


Brick By Boring Brick

by greenblanketbythefire



Series: Your Adventures In The Final Fantasy Universe [3]
Category: Dissidia Final Fantasy NT, Dissidia: Final Fantasy, Dissidia: Final Fantasy Opera Omnia, Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Adopted Sibling Relationship, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, And just kinda gets dropped into a situation by the gods, Angelgard (Final Fantasy XV), Anxiety, Asperger’s syndrome, Astrals Interference, Austistic Noctis, Autism, Canon Rewrite, Class Differences, Cultural Differences, Cultural exchange, Deltarune References, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Falling In Love, Final Fantasy XII Spoilers, Marvel References, Noctis is an aspie, Other, Panic Attacks, Particularly Norse, Protective Siblings, Reader Is a Walking Meme, Reader Knows Basic Latin, Reader Loves Mythology, Reader has Asperger’s Syndrome, Reader is From Another World, Reader is an anxious depressed bean, Reader-Insert, Reader’s knowledge is based on MY knowledge, Self-Indulgent, Sibling Bonding, Tags Would Give It All Away, The Lord of the Rings References, The most fucking self indulgent thing you’ll ever read, Undertale References, reader can play piano, reader is a nerd, reader wears glasses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-03
Updated: 2019-12-31
Packaged: 2020-01-01 13:09:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 66
Words: 237,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18334994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greenblanketbythefire/pseuds/greenblanketbythefire
Summary: Reader literally falls into a world unknown to her. Making a connection to Prince Noctis and his friends, she accompanies them throughout their journey on Eos.





	1. In Tenebrās

Have you ever had a dream where you were falling? Even though you’ve never really fallen from anything before?

Yeah, neither have I. At least, I hadn’t until one day I found myself outside every comfort zone I knew. And you know what? Falling isn’t fun. Not for you, not for the people involved, if any. Because once you fall…

...it’s a bitch getting back up.

 

 

Noctis had never really been one for mornings. That was no secret to anyone, certainly not to Ignis. So once he had finally forced himself up from his sleeping bag and dragged himself outside the tent, he had been expecting breakfast waiting, or at least being cooked. And, of course, that particular day was no exception.

The warm morning air was a nice change from the sweltering heat of the day before. The sun was shining brightly, gleaming on every smooth surface. Noctis wiped the sleep from his eyes and let them adjust.

“Nice of you to join us,” Ignis quipped from the camping stove they had set up that night. He have Noct a small smile. Prompto and Gladiolus were sitting around the now-long-dead fire.

“Mornin’, Noct!” the bubbly blonde greeted.

“Almost thought you were gonna sleep the day away,” said the Shield.

“I could, but then who’d keep your asses in line?” Noct threw back.

“Breakfast is served,” Ignis interrupted, as if to say “Me. _I_ would keep their asses in line.”

The other three soon swarmed the poor man. No one ever had first dibs on breakfast. It was every man for himself and Ignis would take what was left. As soon as four plates were full and four chairs were occupied, the day had commenced. Sausages were scarfed down, eggs were devoured. Bacon was abundant and would not run out any time soon.

As the three finished up and were ready to leave and finish up the hunt they had taken on, there was a loud _B O O M_ that sounded like a sonic boom and a clap of thunder had just shaken hands. Not too far away, up in the sky, what looked like an actual sonic boom (but was later to be revealed not as such) lit up the blue sky with white like a cloud. It was so high up that the four boys did not immediately see what was now falling from the odd formation.

“What is that?” Prompto spoke what they were all thinking.

“Looks like a shadow,” Noctis observed.

“A falling shadow?” Gladio questioned.

“I daresay it’s a _person,”_ Ignis declared, clearly confounded.

“A person?!”

“What do we do?!”

As the dark figure continued to fall from much too great a height, it became more recognizable as at least a person-sized thing at least. Not too much could be determined from so far away.

“The hell do we do?” Gladio roared. As panic set in, Noct began frantically looking around for something to help. His eyes finally settled.

“The tent!” he shouted. “If that’s a person, there’s no way they’re not going to survive a fall that big.”

Without much care for their things, the tent was uprooted from its cozy spot on the Oracle Runes and rushed out into the wilderness. Noctis was warping far ahead to get an estimate of where exactly the thing - or person - was going to inevitably land. There wasn’t much of a shadow on the ground just yet but luckily the occurrence hadn’t happened far from their campsite.

“Over here!”

The four took formation, each holding a different side of the tent. With their practiced teamwork, they followed the the strange form until it came closer.

“By the gods, that really is a person,” Ignis breathed.

“What if they go straight through the tent?” Prompto panicked.

“Not gonna happen,” Gladio growled determinedly.

“Focus,” Noctis directed.

The person’s shadow grew ever larger.

 

 

I had an odd dream one night. I was flying through the sky over an ocean of deep blue. The clouds and I made friends, their fluff fueling my excitement. I’d never had such a dream before. I had always longed to fly, but I was afraid of falling. What happens when you fall and can’t get back up? Is there anyone to help you? What if no one comes?

My dream was not so. There were islands beneath me. I tilted myself forward and began to descend. The islands were not islands, but smaller continents. I was overlooking a beach with white sand and a pier with no boats. Out from the coast was an actual island. It’s mountains looked like angel wings. That intrigued me more than the beach. I had see beaches before, had gotten tired of them. But an island of angels? What did they guard? A heavenly secret? The domain of God?

I hovered near it, the water below me sloshing lazily. Something was stopping me from moving forward. But I wanted to. I drifted slowly, inch by inch, hoping nothing would fly out and command me to stop. This continued until I reached the shore and stepped down onto what looked like the smallest of battlefields.

_I should not be here. I really shouldn’t be here._

I took another step. And another. And one more after that and still more until I was standing in the middle of a circle of swords. What was this place? It’s very air screamed dread. Something had happened here. Something awful.

“And thus, the Lost Child reaches the angel’s guard.”

A soft voice spoke behind me and I whipped around to see- a blur. What was I seeing? An angel? She was- yes, she - blue with wings sprouting from her back. I couldn’t make out a face, and suddenly the air became cold.

And then I was falling.

My eyes opened to see blue once more, but this time it was the blue of the sky.There were clouds beside me and wind in my ears - and then the clouds drifted above me. The screeching currents of air tossed me about. My glasses slipped off my face and I was jerked around. My heart jerked, too, and nearly stopped.

That was definitely ground below. It was a mix of brown and green. I couldn’t see much more than that.

It then dawned on me that I was falling and could not stop.

“Oh my god,” I managed to force out, but my voice was left behind. It was like my bed had pulled out from under me. Hadn’t I just been sleeping?

...Was I screaming? I couldn’t tell if it was me or the wind. My limbs scrambled to find purchase on anything, be it the wind, the disappearing clouds or the sky itself. My hands met nothing and so did my mind. I couldn’t think and that scared me more than anything.

And so I fell.

And fell.

And fell.

The ground was now approaching fast, a dark shape on the ground I could only assume was my shadow. This was it. This was how I died. I was going to die. By all things holy, I was going to _actually die._

_I’m going to die I’m going to die I’m going to die I’m going to die I’m going to-_

“Woah!”

That was not my voice.

My fall was instantly broken by- a trampoline? I was bouncing now and a prolonged squeak left my mouth as the trampoline moved with me.

How on earth did I survive that? How the hell did I _survive that? I should not have survived a fall from that high._

“Careful, now,” said a different voice that still wasn’t mine. My bouncing slowly came to a stop and the trampoline deflated. Wait, trampolines don’t deflate. I was lying on my stomach on what felt like...a rain jacket? Yeah, I definitely should not have survived by a fucking _rain jacket._ Deciding I wasn’t ready to face the world just yet, I stayed lying down.

“Is… is she okay?” came yet another voice.

“Hey, you alright?” asked a fourth. I was nudged. I maneuvered my head to look up. I was met with a bespectacled gaze. Two more people came into view. One was blonde, the other… was there a word for people with black hair? And then another black haired person showed up. Four. Four guys were surrounding me. I wearily lifted myself up only to fall back down again.

“Here,” said the tallest one, coming to help me up. My shock and near-death experience told me to lie the fuck back down but these four men figuratively said otherwise. I was propped up by two strong arms. “You okay? That was some fall.”

“I-I…”

The gravity of the situation - literal and otherwise - came crashing down on me and my eyes stung as I tried to hold back tears.

“I… I don’t… I…”

“Give her a moment, Gladio.” The only one with glasses spoke now. His hair was light brown and styled so his bangs were standing over his forehead. One of my shaking hands came up to wipe the rapidly forming tears away.

“What… What happened…” I finally croaked after what felt like an eternity.

“We were kinda hoping you’d tell us that yourself,” said the first black haired guy. His eyes were a striking blue. And he… looked like an anime character?? What…?

“I-I don’t… I don’t k-know. One moment I was asleep, dreaming, and then I- I woke- I w-w-wo… I w-woke up and I was f-falling…”

I looked up to the sky I just plummeted from. How far up had I been for these four to have time to catch me?

“Th-thanks for catching me…”

“No problem,” said the anime protagonist. “But uh, next time you decide to go skydiving, maybe try it somewhere less… dangerous?”

“Y-yeah… Sounds good…”

“Perhaps we should help her to camp,” suggested Glasses.

“Right,” answered the one holding me up. “Can ya walk?”

“Um…” I hummed quietly. I took a shaky step forward - and promptly collapsed. “...No.”

I was suddenly yanked up. The tallest was now carrying me towards what looked like a flat rock with blue carvings. I squeaked again as I realized I was now in the air again. Squirming, I tried to get comfortable.

“Stop moving,” my carrier grunted.

“Sorry,” I whispered. As I was carried, I looked around. I was in what could be described as sort of desert mixed with grassland. I wasn’t really up to date on overly specific biomes.

I was transport up a natural ramp of a walkway and found the four guys had made a camp here. But the tent was… ohhhh… So _that’s_ what I landed on. As I inspected the place, I realized I had interrupted their breakfast. Whoops. Note to self, apologize for that later. There were four camping chairs around the remains of a campfire. I was deposited in one of said chairs. The foursome moved around so I could see them all.

“Thanks…”I trailed, not knowing who to look at. So I looked down at the campfire. It was just charred wood at this point.

“So you don’t know how you got here,” stated the Carrier. I shook my head and looked back up at each of them.

“Do you have a name?” the blonde one asked. I told them my name quietly.

“Where are you from? Anywhere around here?” That question came from Anime Protag. My heart felt weird the longer I looked at him. It wasn’t fluttering, per se, but there was a weird tug towards him. Due to the look on his face, he felt it too.

“Uh… Where am I?” I asked in return.

“Near Hammerhead,” Glasses answered.

“And… where’s that?”

“Leide.”

”And…. where is that?”

The four exchanged glances and looked back to me.

“Lucis,” said Anime Protag.

”And… where is that?” I asked for the millionth time, feeling utterly lost.

“You don’t… You’re not from Lucis?”

”Lucis?”

”What about Niflheim?” Carrier interrogated. “You from Niflheim?”

“Niflheim…? You know that’s not a- Wait, what?”

I looked at them, extremely confused and wondering why they thought I was from a mythological realm.

“If you’re not from Lucis or Niflheim, then are you from Altissia?” the blonde one asked curiously.

“From where?”

“Or Tenebrae?” Anime Protag looked hopeful.

“Darkness??? I’m not from darkness, that sounds ominous…”

“Then where the hell are you from?”

“I’m from America.”

They didn’t look convinced.

“Y-you know, the United States? On North America? B-Bordered by Canada… and Mexico…?”

“Yeah… Never heard of any of those places.” Carrier was looking at me like I was now a suspect for a murder.

“So you’re from Nowhere,” Anime Protag deadpanned. I slumped in my seat.

“Might as well be…” I muttered. “I’ve never heard of… Lucis? Light? O-or… What’s an ‘Altissia’?”

”Not Niflheim?”

“I’m not from a mythological realm, no.”

“A what?” Blondie looked more confused than ever.

“Niflheim? One of the nine realms from Norse mythology?”

They exchanged glances once more.

“Is there an Asgard? Midgard? Jotunheim?”

No answer. Yep. I was totally screwed.


	2. Princeps Filius, Scutum, Consiliarius, et Pauper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader begins to get to know the world she is now in.

"So… Noctis… Ignis… Prompto… Gladio…?”

I got four nods in return. Ignis was back at the stove, gathering something onto a plate. Noctis and Prompto were sitting now, but Gladio remained standing, still eyeing me with suspicion. I felt guilty under his gaze, even though I had done nothing wrong. I had done nothing wrong… right? 

_ Night, fire, prompt, sword, _ I thought. 

They had also given me their last names. Noctis’ name essentially meant “night light sky” so I opted to call him “nightlight” in my head. Ignis’ name literally meant “fire knowledge” which I thought was funny. Amicitia sounded like the word for friend, so I assumed that’s what it meant. As for Argentum, again, no clue.

These four seemed nice enough. Gladio was Carrier, Ignis was Glasses, Prompto was Blondie, and Noctis was Anime Protag. Prompto seemed like the happy go lucky one of the group, Noctis was obviously the emo or at least the most brooding, Ignis was smartest, denoted by his glasses, and Gladio must be the overprotective one. Wait…

“Y-you guys wouldn’t have happened to have seen a pair of glasses when I fell, did you?” I spouted.

“Uh, I didn’t see anything, did you?” Prompto asked Noctis. The latter shook his head.

“Did you, Specs?” Gladio inquired.

“I’m afraid not,” Ignis replied. “Do you know when they came off?”

“While I was falling…” I disclosed.

“I’ll go take a look,” Gladio offered, already walking towards the ledge we had walked up.

“Oh, that’s okay!” I quickly cut in. “You don’t have to - I’ll just… go look when I’m - when I can walk again.”

“And how exactly are you going to see?”

“Uh, well… I mean, I can see, everything’s just really fuzzy…”

“Yeah, thought so.”

He went off anyway. I slumped in my chair for what felt like the billionth time. These guys were saints for being so nice. How would I repay them? I didn’t have anything on me that was worth much, except for...

“My phone…” I whispered to myself. I pulled the device out of my pocket and tapped the screen. It lit up, battery almost full. It displayed the time - 10:51am.

“Hey, you’ve got a phone?” Prompto lit up as well. “Maybe we’re not so different after all!”

“Uh, yeah…” I unlocked it only to find that there was no signal. My hand dropped to my lap. “So much for that…”

I slipped it back into my pocket. Oh, so the universe decided my headphones would travel with me, as well. Nice to know. Other than those two things, however, there was nothing else in my jacket pockets.

“So do you remember anything from before you fell?” Ignis asked. “Any strange dreams or visions?”

“Um…”

I struggled to remember. I had been flying and then… there was that beach and then that island… everything after that was a mystery locked behind a blurry glass door. I relayed this to them.

“A beach?” Prompto voiced. “You mean like Galdin Quay?”

“Galdin what?” I questioned.

“Galdin Quay! It’s a beach resort. We were heading there, actually.”

“That island could be near there,” Noctis suggested. “It’s good place as any to start.”

“Wait, you mean you’ll- you’ll… help me?” I asked, bewildered. I must have looked pitifully touched.

“Well, yeah, I mean… We found you and you don’t know where you are; ‘s’not like we could just leave you here.”

“Well, I mean, you could but… That’s awfully kind of you… You don’t have to, I’m sure I could… um… well, I’m sure I could figure it out.”

“But you don’t even know what country you’re in,” Prompto put in.

“I just… I don’t… Y-you must be busy. I’d just… Won’t I get in the way?”

They looked surprised for some reason. I shrunk into myself, pulling my jacket more tightly around me. Anxiety was creeping in, making me feel guilty for holding these guys up with whatever they were doing. Why would they help me? Won’t I just be a burden?

“Like Prompto said, we were heading to Galdin anyway,” Ignis swooped in to save me from my thoughts. “Since it sounds like you were there in your dream, it makes sense to bring you along with us.”

Tears pricked my eyes. “That’s… so nice of you…”

Of all the people I could have run - or fell - into, it just so happened to be the four nicest guys on this planet.

“I should have asked - do you have any food allergies?” Ignis asked. I looked up at him. He was holding a plate with food on it.

“Uh… Well… It’s kind of embarrassing but… I’m allergic to apples.”

“Apples?” Noctis and Prompto synced. I blushed and nodded.

“My teeth get all tingly and my lips swell up. It’s not fun. I really miss eating apples.”

“Noted,” Ignis stated. He handed me the plate. An assortment of basic breakfast foods had been neatly arranged onto it. Bacon, eggs, sausage, and a little bit of fruit. Ignis was picking away a few apple slices. “Anything else we should know?”

“Wow, thanks,” I breathed, taking the plate. My next words were spoken smally. “Um… I… I hate to be a bother but… it’s no secret to anyone who knows me that I’m a picky eater…”

“You’re not the only one.” Ignis gave Noctis a disapproving glance.

“B-but I… I have a reason… But… I mean… Well… Do you… Do you guys know what Asperger’s Syndrome is?”

“Asperger’s Syndrome?” Prompto echoed, much like I had done earlier with place names.

“Ah, yes, it’s a mild form of autism, is it not?” Ignis speculated. I sighed with relief.

“Yeah, ‘mild,’” I repeated with air quotes. “To you, at least. Good to know that exists… wherever I am.”

“Wait, autism, like- like the mental illness?” Prompto questioned.

“Disorder. It’s a mental disorder, not illness.” I may have sounded too harsh when I said that, but oh well. Too late to take it back. “Contrary to popular belief, there is not a ‘cure’ and certainly no epidemic.”

“Oh. Okay. Good to know, I guess.”

“Sorry, I feel kinda strongly about that.”

“No, it’s fine! The more you know.”

I gave a half smile and began to pick at my food. After the first bite, I realized how hungry I was. Gladio came back not long after I finished.

“These yours?” He held up my beloved glasses. I smiled widely then and nodded.

“Thank you so much!”

“No problem. They’re a bit dirty, though.”

“When are they not?”

I heard Ignis give a short huff of laughter. I used my shirt to scrub the dirt and dust off. Once it was acceptable, I slipped them on.

“That’s much better.”

“So, how’re your legs?” Gladio asked. “Think you can walk now?”

My eyebrows furrowed. I moved to put pressure on one foot. It was a bit shaky but seemed like it could hold me. I braced myself and stood. Wobbling, I let gravity do its job and gained balance. Just put one foot in front of the other… I couldn’t hide a relieved smile. I could walk, albeit like a newborn lamb. The others looked ready to help if I should collapse.

“I think I’m good,” I said slowly.

“Good. We takin’ her with us?”

“Yep,” said Noctis. “She had a dream about Galdin before she fell. Might as well let her tag along.”

“Galdin, huh? You know Galdin but not the rest of Lucis?”

“I wouldn’t say that,” Ignis said. “None of our familiar locations seem to ring a bell.”

“You don’t think Cindy or Cid would know anything about this, do you?” Prompto asked with hope in his voice. I wondered who Cindy and Cid were.

“That’s not a bad place to start. Perhaps there’s a local legend of people falling from the sky.”

“Still gotta finish that hunt for Dave, first,” Noctis cut in. “Can’t walk into town empty handed.”

I watched the conversation pan out with curiosity. I had no idea what they were talking about, but if I was indeed in a completely different world, then I’d need to get my bearings. From what I could infer, these guys had helped someone named Dave and offered to finish hunting something for him.

“Hey,” Gladio said, getting my attention. “Can you fight?”

“Can I what?” I blurted out. Fight? Why would I need to fight? “Um, no.”

“Should we leave her here and come back?”

_ I’m right here… _

“Nah, she can just hang back,” Noctis told him. He looked at me. “That okay with you?”

I nodded, utterly lost once more. What were they fighting? Would it really take all four of them to defeat it? As Noctis headed back down to the grassy plain below, I followed with a million thoughts running through my head.

The first was how surreal this whole experience was. These guys didn’t seem any different from back home. Somehow we all spoke the same language. The terrain wasn’t unfamiliar, either. Maybe Lucis was some obscure country I’d never heard of before, closed off from the rest of the world. But then there was the mention of Niflheim. Surely that wasn’t a coincidence. But if they knew Norse mythology, then how did they not know what America was?

Another matter was the feeling of this new place. It certainly  _ felt  _ new, but not in a way that was unsettling. There was an odd sense of mysticism that came from my surroundings, almost like the land was infused with a magic of some sort. I’d never lucid dreamed before, but was this what it was like? Was I lucid dreaming? I decided to test it. You can control lucid dreams, right? Lucid and Lucis sound similar. So… I conjured up a torch in my mind. Focusing, I tried to transfer that thought into whatever reality I was now in.

Nothing happened. I tried again. Nothing. My eyes narrowed.  _ Now _ something felt off. I had been treating this like it was a dream. I pinched myself. Ouch. I gave my arm a slap. Pain but nothing else. My heart jolted and my breathing picked up. This wasn’t a dream. My God, this isn’t a dream.

“Hey.” I looked up to see Noctis addressing me. “You got dualhorns where you’re from?”

“Uhh… I don’t think so,” I answered, glad something was taking my mind off an impending existential crisis. “What’s that?”

“Big gray brute,” Gladio said. “Two horns, taller than me. Don’t let it see you. Can’t have you getting hurt.”

Whatever a dualhorn is, it sounded huge.

“S-So, um, how far is it?” I asked.

“A few minutes at least,” Noctis answered. “Why?”

“I was just wondering- if- if I could ask you some things.”

“Sure!” Prompto chirped. “Go for it.”

“Alright, so… We’re in a place called Lucis. And there’s also a place called Niflheim and… Tenebrae? Are they all the same place, like, the same country, or…?”

“We’re in Lucis right now,” Ignis explained. “It is a kingdom plagued by darkness, as is the rest of world. Niflheim is an empire to the north. They are bent on conquering every land  they can get their hands on. Tenebrae is one of their territories. It was taken twelve years ago, and Accordo, where the city of Altissia lies, has been under their rule for much longer.”

“Oh, okay. So… you’re at war with Niflheim? Is that why you were so suspicious?”

“Our apologies, but yes. Can’t be too careful.”

“It’s okay. I understand now. And… is this ‘Galdin Quay’ in Lucis?”

“Won’t be for much longer,” Noctis said bitterly. I gave Ignis a questioning glance. The man sighed, pushing his glasses up.

“Recently, a peace treaty was proposed by none other than the Chancellor himself.” Even Ignis sounded frustrated. “From what I heard, he waltzed right in as if he owned the place.”

“Demanded Lucis give up all territories save the Crown City,” Gladio said. “And His Majesty has us going to Altissia so this guy,” he jabbed his thumb in Noctis’ direction, “can get married to Lady Lunafreya to officiate it.”

Wow, the king himself had asked these guys to accomplish such a task? But what was so special about Noctis to be the one betrothed. Did that make him the Crown Prince? Was I traveling with an actual  _ prince? _

“To answer the look on your face, yes, Noct  _ is _ the next in line to the throne,” Ignis said.

“That’s… a lot to take in,” I managed. “And… you’re  _ sure _ I’m not getting in the way?”

“How many times we gotta tell ya?” Noctis sounded exasperated. “It’s no hold up to us. Certainly not to you.”

I sunk into my jacket protectively. I wished I could tell him about anxiety. Would that make me less annoying? Did they find me annoying? I hoped not. They wouldn’t offer to help me if they did, right?

“And don’t think just ‘cause I’m a prince means you have to act any differently. Prompto’s never treated me like one, so neither should you.”

For some reason that made me smile. It was like they were accepting me already and I had only known them for less than an hour. I made to tell them they were the nicest guys I’d ever met when a loud roar cut the tracks of my train of thought. We had come to clearing with an opening in the raised land before us. Looking ahead, I noticed Gladio’s description hadn’t been wrong.

In the middle of the open inlet was what looked like a rhino. The only differences were the horn, which split into two, and some odd black vapor rising from its head. I shrunk back. Yeah, I’d definitely let these four handle this. I blinked and- where did Gladio get that sword from?

I looked at each of them. Noctis held a one-handed sword, Gladio’s was a huge two-handed rectangular sword that looked to be longer than his body, Ignis was gripping twin daggers, and Prompto had a gun. Where did those come from? They hadn’t been holding those before.

Noctis looked ready to charge into battle, but Gladiolus grabbed his shoulder, holding him back.

“Wait a sec,” he said somewhat casually for facing such an enormous creature. I noted the similar lingo in language.

“What?” Prompto teased. “Scared, big guy?”

“You oughta be, too. Thing’s vicious.”

“Looks tame to me.”

“Yeah,” Noctis agreed. I did not.

“What’s wrong with its head?” I asked quietly, more to myself than anyone else. That mist coming from its head gave me a bitter feeling, like something was waiting to strike unseen. I was suddenly pushed behind Ignis as he told them to look out. The dualhorn was approaching. We had been spotted. My eyes widened as it began to charge. Four of us moved out of the way as Gladio went straight towards it. With a somewhat slow yet powerful swing, he knocked the thing on its side with his greatsword. “Woah…”

“Yeah! Show him who’s boss!” “Nice one!”

“It’s not over yet!” Ignis called out my name. “Find somewhere to hide!”

“R-right!”

I scrambled to a rock nearby that I could peer over. I felt a bit cowardly but there really wasn’t anything I could do. I thought about distracting it for them, but wasn’t that a bit much to do for people I had just met?

_ They need their lives more than you, _ my bastard of a brain told me.  _ You can’t even do anything to help. Useless. _

_ I don’t really know what you expect me to do about that at, like, 11 in the morning, my dude, _ I shot back. I decided to ignore my thoughts and watch the battle before me.

It was something straight out of a modern fantasy setting. Noctis was zipping around the clearing in bright blue flashes, attacking the dualhorn from its blind spots. Gladio was clearly the powerhouse of the quarter in terms of strength. He was dealing damage left and right. Ignis was absolutely graceful with his daggers. Every move was like watching the lovechild of ballet and combat. Prompto, however, was clearly the least skilled. The others had obviously been training for years but the blonde wasn’t quite up to date. That didn’t mean he wasn’t good at what he did, though. He seemed to find openings quicker than anyone else and used those to his advantage.

I wished I had thought to record the whole thing but I was so mesmerized by what I was seeing that I had forgot about my phone. Most of my focus was on Noctis. I wasn’t sure how he was- was-  _ warping _ around the scene like he had some crazy teleportation magic. Magic was probably what it was; if this world was “plagued by darkness” then magic surely wasn’t out of the question.

They wrapped up the fight fairly quickly, Noctis landing the final blow. The hulking creature fell onto its side once more and did not get up. I stood from my hiding spot, unsure what to say. The others looked to me, almost as if waiting for approval.

“That-“ I stuttered, a dorky smile forming on my face, “that was  _ awesome _ .”

“Haha, yeah, we know,” Prompto said proudly.

“What, don’t have regular beast hurts wherever you’re from?” Gladio asked teasingly.

“Not with something like  _ that,” _ I answered, still impressed. I glanced at Noctis. “And certainly not with crazy…  _ warping _ abilities.”

“Warping’s actually what it’s called,” he told me.

“Oh. Well, it was still cool. The rest of you can’t do that?”

“Only Noct can since he’s royalty,” Gladio explained. “But we can summon weapons like he can.”

“So it’s a bloodline thing? Is it, like, magic?”

“That is a story to be left for the road,” said Ignis. “I hate to kill the mood, but the car is most likely finished by now.”

We began walking, all of us following Noctis. I wondered what had happened to their car. What did Ignis mean by “finished?” Did it break? My mind was like a hydra. I had so many questions. Each time one was answered, more took its place.

Beneath my jacket, my skin was starting to feel slick. Oh great I was sweating. But no way in hell was I taking my jacket off. It’s my security blanket, and we would not be separated. The heat was sweltering, though. Must be summer, I thought.

“There’s only so far a man can walk,” Noctis complained up ahead. I could see a small gas station getting nearer now. I assumed we were heading there.

“Our Crown City upbringing didn’t prepare us for this,” Prompto added.

“Pretend you’re walking to the car,” Ignis said. I let out an amused exhale. Traveling with these guys was going to be fun, I could already tell.

“So…” I found myself saying despite my mind’s anxious warnings. “If Noctis is the prince, then who are you guys?”

“I’m just a commoner,” Prompto said lightly. Ignis explained that they had met in high school which had me questioning why the prince of an entire nation would go to a public school. Then Noct backtracked and told me that they had met before that when Lady Lunafreya’s dog was injured and Prompto nursed it back to health. I thought that was sweet.

Next was Gladiolus, who was Noctis’ Shield. That one was pretty straightforward. He was to protect Noctis with his life and he took great pride in it. It had been his family’s duty for generations. He was also the one to teach Noctis how to fight. That created an interesting dynamic between the two.

Last but certainly not least was Ignis. He was Noctis’ retainer/advisor. He had been tending to the prince since they were little kids and was very much the mom friend of the entire group. He did the cooking, too, and most of the driving. I was starting to get a picture of how these four interacted and worked together. They were a very close knit group and while I did feel extremely out of place, I also felt like they’d be willing to have a fifth member, even if it was only temporary.


	3. “This Is Wonderful! This Is Going To Be Fine!” I Was Soon To Change My Mind, However

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A shocking revelation befalls Dear Reader, so she does what she does best: pushes it down.

Hammerhead wasn’t as shark themed as I’d expected. In fact, I was sorely disappointed in the lack of sharp-toothed water predators. Not even one Jimmy Buffett Landshark. How dare they.

Anyway, on the way there, whoever this Cindy person was called to confirm their car had been fixed. Then, right as we reached the road, the largest bird I’d ever seen flew down and right over us. It reminded me of the first Pokemon episode when Ho-oh flies over Ash. Except this thing was dark and terrifying and had, like, six wings. I decided to call it the Roc because that was only bird I knew of to be that size.

Crossing the highway - was it a highway? I couldn’t tell, there were only two lanes - we came into your regular run downish interstate gas station. There was a diner to the left, the convenient store in the middle, and a car garage to the right. In the front of the garage was a beautiful black convertible which I later came to know as the Regalia. It was Noctis’ own version of the Winchesters’ Impala in Supernatural. The only problem was that I didn’t know how I was going to fit in there with four guys, two of which reached at least six feet tall.

Standing next to the Regalia was a cute blonde girl wearing a rather revealing outfit. My mind began to judge but I immediately put a stop to that. This girl could wear whatever the hell she wanted. Besides, in that heat, I didn’t blame her.

Noctis and the girl - Cindy - exchanged a few words. The car was ready to go. The girl’s country accent took me by surprise but it put me at ease. I may not have a Southern accent myself, but being from the South, it was familiar and comforting. My Aspie senses were ringing with happiness at the familiarity of the small town. It was no different from the rest stops you find off highway exits.

The four went to take a picture with the Regalia. I moved out of the way, not sure if I was welcome to their small festivities just yet. Once Cindy handed the camera back to Prompto, she turned to me.

“I see ya’ll made a new friend,” she said. “Don’t think I’ve seen ya around here before. Where ya from?”

“Uhh…” I blanked, freezing up. Thankfully, the world had gifted us Ignis.

“About that,” he cut in, pushing his glasses up, “we were wondering if you or Cid happened to know of any… urban legends around here regarding strangers from the sky.”

“Hmm, now that’s an odd question…” Cindy thought for a moment. “I don’t remember hearing anything like that recently, but Pawpaw might be able to ya’ll more than me.”

We followed her inside the garage. Pawpaw was Cid and Cid was an old man with a beard and red cap. He had clearly been working in this business for a while. Oil stained his worn jeans and his red uniform jacket had seen better days. He looked to be a grandfather like figure, though a little rough around the edges.

“Hey, Pawpaw, the boys have a little question for ya, if you don’t mind.”

“What is it?” I had been expecting a raspy voice. He sounded a tad annoyed, though. “Something’s not wrong with the car, I hope. You didn’t wreck it again, didja?”

“Uh, no,” Noctis answered, a bit put off. “Actually, we were wondering if maybe you could tell us about any kind of story or rumor of people falling from the sky…?”

It really did sound ridiculous now that it was spoken aloud. Cid turned from where he was tinkering with something and locked eyes with… me.

“Fallin’ from the sky, huh,” he muttered, studying my now anxious figure. “I can think of one legend, not sure how much truth there is to it.”

“Would you mind telling us?” Ignis asked. “We witnessed a, er, odd phenomena earlier this morning.”

“Mind, it is a thousand years old, but… you didn’t find this girl just anywhere, didja? Haven’t seen her before.”

My eyes widened and I shrunk behind Noctis.

“Well, story goes that one of the Oracles was passin’ through. Stopped at a campsite not too far from here that turned into those blue runes. One day, a man just fell from the sky, like a fallen angel, or something like that. Only he was as human as you and me.”

So this had happened before…? Who was the Oracle? Could I get home?

“I don’t know the details, but that fella and the Oracle got along mighty fine. Traveled with her and saw what the world had to offer. Not much more to it than that. Some people believe they even got married.”

“But- Did he ever get back?” I asked frantically. “To where he came from?”

“Can’t say he did. But that’s the gods for ya. You got a purpose, you serve it. Astrals know I learned that the hard way.”

It was like reality came crashing down around me. I couldn’t hear anything or feel anything. I could see but it was like white was fading in from the corners of my vision. My breath hitched and my eyes were stinging from keeping a wide stare.

Things had been going so smoothly, for the most part. I didn’t die from falling. I found a group of guys who were kind enough to help me figure this all out. I got to visit a different world and witness actual magic. I had been alright for a while. But this? Not being able to get back home? Not getting to see my family again? No more waking up to my cat purring beside me? Or spending weekends with my friends? ...No more exact, familiar surroundings to keep me at true ease?

I didn’t even notice I’d been moving. Someone was gripping my shoulder and leading me outside. The sun was too bright. It was so bright, I couldn’t take it. I covered my eyes with my hand, desperately trying to block out the light. It didn’t work. Why wasn’t it working? Why couldn’t I go home?

“-ou alright?”

_What?_

“S… out of…”

Slowly, I tuned back into my new reality. I was standing outside the garage in the afternoon sun. Noctis and Ignis were directly in front of me. They looked equally concerned. My cheeks felt wet. The air smelled humid and hot. The warmth from the sun was scorching and my face was flushed.

“She needs to sit down,” Ignis told Noctis. He nodded. It was his hand on my shoulder. He directed me toward the diner where I was sat down in a secluded corner and out of the sun. I raised a hand to my face. I hadn’t even realized I was crying. I was so confused. This wasn’t a dream, no.

It was a nightmare.

 

 

I wasn’t sure how long I stayed staring at the table surface. I was holding my new friends up, I knew that. But I couldn’t just ignore this problem like I usually would. There was no escape from it. I was lost in a totally different world with no way back and with no recollection of how I had really gotten here. It was tearing me apart inside. If I didn’t get ahold of myself soon, I’d have a panic attack and that was something no one wanted, especially not in a public place.

“She gonna be okay?” I heard Gladio’s voice.

“I’m starting to think maybe I should call my dad,” came Noctis’. “Bet he’d know what to do.”

“I’m not sure it’d be best to call him just yet,” said Ignis. “He’s much too busy with the peace treaty.”

“Then what do we do?” Prompto asked. “We can’t just leave her. Not like this. Not even at Galdin.”

“Then we take her to see Luna,” Noctis decided.

“I was about to suggest the same, Highness,” Ignis agreed.

“If we can’t reach Dad, then that’s the next best thing. Maybe she’ll know more about this than we do.”

“We can only hope.”

Another thirty minutes later and I was feeling more and more like a fish out of water. These boys were willing to help me fix this, but that didn’t stop me from being a literal alien. I had no idea how this world worked. They had mentioned gods several times. So they must be polytheistic. Had these gods summoned me here? But for what? Why on Earth would they want me of all people? I shouldn’t even be on their list!

Someone softly said my name. I looked up to see my new companions looking very worried.

“Hey, you okay?” Prompto asked quietly. “You look pretty pale…”

I shook my head. How could I be okay right now?

_Push it down. Don’t let it get to you. Don’t let them see how hurt you are. You’re just burdening them more._

“We… We thought we’d take you to see Luna, the Oracle,” Noctis explained softly. “The, uh, _current_ Oracle. We were already going there anyway, so don’t think anything of it, okay?”

 _Why are they being so_ nice _to me?_

“What am I supposed to do…?” I whispered, my voice cracking. My breathing picked up. “I can- I can’t- I c-ca…”

The road to hyperventilation was uncomfortable and unwanted. My throat dried quickly as my breaths became shorter and quicker and I felt like I couldn’t breathe. My right hand slipped under my glasses to cover my eyes. The sensory overload was too much. I had to calm down. I forced myself to take deep breaths as someone rubbed circles on my back. My lungs slowed their intake and I began to count. I counted the windows in the diner, the chairs, and people. With each number I uttered, I calmed down just a little bit more. Finally I reached stable point.

“I can…” I breathed. “I can do this. Just gotta make it… to the Oracle.”

“That’s the spirit,” Ignis encouraged. I shoved all thought of home and the dread of not returning to the back of my mind. I would just have to focus on my curiosity to remain sane. Yeah. I could do that. Right?

“But uh… where do I start?”

“You mean, where do we start?” Prompto corrected, a bit lightly now that I was looking better.

“We’re going to Altissia, where His Highness’ wedding will be held,” Ignis said. “And since he is marrying the Oracle herself, I see no reason not to take you with us.”

“Same here,” Noctis chimed in. “It’s no trouble at all, okay?”

I nodded. I quietly told them they were the nicest people I’d ever met. That seemed to lift everyone’s spirits. After a few minutes of letting me catch my breath still, we had a quick lunch and headed out to the car. Cindy was waiting, looking just as concerned as the guys, and so was Cid. Although, he seemed more stern than anything.

“Hey, you feeling alright?” Cindy asked softly. I nodded, not feeling up to smiling just yet. “Just let us know if you need anything.”

“Thanks,” I said, voice wavering a little. This whole situation was hard to swallow. Nothing _looked_ different from home besides the wildlife. But if I thought enough, the realization that I might never see my family again caused a big lump to form in my throat.

“Here.” Cid’s voice drew me from my snowballing mindset. He was handing me a thick book that honestly looked more like a textbook than light reading. “S’not much, but if it turns out you can’t get back, well, might be good to get familiar with the land.”

The book was a history of this world, which was called Eos. I turned to the table of contents. The book started right at the beginning with a brief summary of their cosmogony. My lips weren’t listening to my brain but my eyes lit up. I had always been a sucker for mythology and the history of other places.

“Thank you,” I said, firmer this time.

“Shall we get moving?” Ignis proposed. Noctis nodded. We approached the car, which was shining in the afternoon sun. While Cindy asked them to make a delivery for her, I was still locked in my own thoughts. I was forcing myself to think of anything other than home. So I wondered where I’d be sitting. The front would be nice, but I didn’t want to take that from someone who needed it more. That left the middle of the back. I sighed. Physical contact with other people really isn’t my thing. I treasure my personal space and touching people makes me uncomfortable. But… there wasn’t any other option.

“So, how we gonna do this?” Gladio voiced what I was thinking.

“The driver’s seat is yours, Noct,” Ignis said. He left it to Ignis. “You’ll be sitting in the back, then?”

“Yeah. You too, Gladio?”

“I need the leg room,” he answered.

“I don’t mind sitting in the back if ______ wants the front,” Prompto piped up. My need to please would not allow it.

“No, no, that’s okay!” I said hurriedly. “Won’t it get cramped?”

“Well, yeah, but-”

“Then I’ll sit wherever you need me to.”

“You sure?” Noctis asked. I nodded, much to my personal space’s chagrin. “Then… I guess we can see how it goes.”

We piled in. I was sandwiched between Noctis and Gladio, in that order. Prompto had shotgun. I suggested to him that we could always take turns. He happily agreed and off we went. Ignis made sure to tell me it was okay to ask questions if I had anymore. As I read through the beginning of Cid’s book, boy, did I.

“So you guys are polytheistic?” I asked.

“Yep,” Noct answered shortly. “You’re not?”

“Depends on the religion. My world’s got plenty. Most of the popular ones are monotheistic, though.”

“So you only worship one god?” Prompto asked, looking back at us.

“Some people do. Others worship multiple. Some don’t believe in a god altogether. Religion’s a really touchy subject where I’m from.”

“Huh. Weird,” Noct said.

I read about Solheim, an ancient civilization that had died out thousands of years ago. Some ruins of their structures dotted Lucis’ land, but not many had been fully explored. I wondered why but as I reached the War of the Astrals, I soon learned. It scared me a bit, to be honest.

This world was overrun by daemons at night. Not many were brave enough to traverse the land at that time and most of the Solheim ruins were dark and only opened at night. That didn’t stop some archaeologists, though. There were rumors of Niflheim delving into the ruins for unknown purposes over the last thirty years but they hadn’t put out any sort of big discovery concerning their history. That made me suspicious. Personally, I didn’t really have a stance on this whole war thing. I usually prefer to remain neutral, especially if I don’t have both sides of the story. Niflheim was no different, but their actions in these ruins were odd.

As the sun started going down, I reached the building of the kingdom of Lucis. Somnus Lucis Caelum was Noctis’ ancestor, a man who had worked with the first Oracle to purge the world of the Starscourge, some sort of disease that was running rampant at the time. But… There were a few holes I noticed in the story. The Oracle had been blessed with the power to heal the afflicted, but Somnus… The details on him were vague and kind of confusing. The author of the book stated that the primary sources from that time did not explicitly identify Somnus as the healer of Lucis. If anything, there were hardly any primary sources containing information on the healer. That led to more questions.

“So this healer of Lucis…” I began. “Who exactly was he? The book kind of separates him and Somnus. Are they the same person? Did they work together?”

“That has been speculated for hundreds of years,” Ignis answered. “Most have come to the conclusion that they were the same, but since not much information has been found regarding the subject, it has been dropped almost entirely and is often considered myth.”

“Oh, okay.”

We pulled into a rest stop. Nothing looked different from home. After the whole panic attack incident earlier, I had put myself into the mindset that this was an extended vacation with some new friends I had made. Of course, the reality was that I was ignoring the problem at hand and masking it. That is what I do best.

“Night is falling, Noct,” Ignis said. I marked my place in my book. So far this healer of Lucis and Solheim were my main interests. If I wasn’t careful, they’d become special interests. ...Oh, who am I kidding? I was totally going to let that happen.

“We’ll stay at the Motel then,” Noctis decided. I followed them to the concierge (who was in a booth outside for some reason). He was the one we were delivering to, anyway. As the quartet counted up their money - they didn’t take cards outside the Crown City - I observed my surroundings. The rest stop was small but efficient. A motel, a gas pump, a small shop, and a few other buildings made a sort of square. A few old cars were littered here and there and pairs of people made spots in the scene. “We only have enough for one room…”

“Spent the rest on potions?” Gladio asked. Potions?

“Yeah… Can’t be too careful, y’know?”

“Huh. Thinkin’ ahead for once.”

“What do you mean ‘for once’?”

“As we were saying,” Ignis cut in, turning to me, “we only have one room. Will that be alright?”

“Yeah, I don’t see why not,” I blurted out, my words choppy. These clothes were all I had. What was I going to do about pajamas? As for sharing a room with four guys… Eh, they seemed nice enough. They were certainly thoughtful.

“I’m sure we can find you a change of clothes nearby.”

“S- Sounds good.”

Dammit my stuttering was back.

 

Once the guys had settled in the room, Prompto joined me and Ignis to find some clothes. We wandered into a small shop with flickering lights and a dusty smell. There were racks of clothes making rows from the front to the back. The floor was tiled white, gray, and light gray, and the walls were a cream or white, it was hard to tell. At the back of the shop was the cash register and a display case for what I guessed was jewelry. Manning the register was a middle aged blonde woman whose hair reminded me of Prompto’s, oddly enough. She immediately noticed us, her head shooting up and a bright smile spreading over her face. She hurried to the front to greet us.

“Hello, hello!” she practically shouted. I flinched. Too loud. “Name’s Minnie. How can I help ya?”

“We were looking for a change of clothes or two for the lady,” Ignis said smoothly. One of my brows lifted and I gave him a glance.

“Lady?” I muttered.

Minnie took a moment appraise me. After an awkward moment of me avoiding eye contact, she nodded.

“Y’know, I have a scarf that would look lovely on you,” she said. “I know it’s scorching out, but really, it’d bring out those beautiful eyes.”

“U-um, o- okay,” I said with a small voice. I retreated into my hoodie. This woman was overwhelming already. Ignis gave me a sympathetic smile. Prompto seemed pretty cheery. Extroverts will be extroverts.

Minnie led us to the front, asking what style I usually wore. I gestured to my current outfit: jeans, T-shirt, zip hoodie. Simple and casual and very, very comfortable. I was not much of a fashion person. Her eyes narrowed.

“I see,” she said. “Well, that scarf will compliment anything. You know, about thirty years or so ago I had a rather eccentric man come in. Took most of my scarves, but I still have some of those lying around. Chose a rather… interesting looking shirt, a bit like a coffee filter but he made it look good, I must say.”

She giggled after that. Something told me she had tried to pick this guy up and failed.

“Rather charming… Anyway, why don’t you three have a look around while I go find that old thing…”

“Well, she seemed nice,” Prompto said after she left. “Wonder who that guy was.”

I began to search for my beloved T-shirts. There was a whole rack of them against the right wall. I had noticed my new friends all wore black, so maybe that and something blue or green. The shirts were organized by color so I sifted through the black ones first. Most of them had phrases and pictures I didn’t recognized, most likely pop culture references. But my eyes did like the look of one that had a black bird on it. It was like a chicken and a raven had a child.

“Is that a chocobo?” Prompto said behind me. I jumped. “Sorry.”

“S’okay. What’s a chocobo?”

He let out a very dramatic yet comical gasp. Ignis came hurrying over.

“You don’t have chocobos where you live?!” Prompto exclaimed. Ignis sighed. Not an alarm, he thought.

“Uh… No?” I answered, voice higher in pitch. “Is that what this is?”

“Chocobos used to be used for transport back in the day,” Ignis explained. “They’re usually yellow, but their feather can be dyed. However, sometimes chicks come out naturally black. A gene mutation, I would say.”

I hummed. Chocobos were used for travelling. Did they not have horses in this world? “Well, it’s cute.”

“Ooh, look, this one has a moogle!” Prompto said. He held up a blue shirt with an odd white creature with an pink antennae. “You should get this one, too! They’ll match!”

“A moogle?” That word sounded funny. “Alright. I like blue.”

I chose another shirt to wear for sleep. It was white with the phrase “I want to ride my chocobo all day” on it. Prompto started singing when he saw it so I figured, why not? I also found some jeans and gray pajama pants with an intricate black pattern on it. They were soft. Prompto and Ignis also did some browsing, but neither brought anything back to the counter where Minnie was now waiting.

“I see you found something,” she said cheerfully. As she rung up the clothes, she paused when she saw the pajama pants. “That man I mentioned before was wearing something like this, if I remember correctly, but it was on his coat. Don’t know why he sits in my mind so fresh; a bit odd but memorable, I suppose.”

I was starting to feel uncomfortable again. She lifted up a dark red scarf. The pattern was faint but beautiful: an array of leaves that twirled and twisted through the fabric. When I felt the cloth, it was so soft it was it might’ve been made with silk.

“What do you think?” she asked. For the first time in hours, I smiled. This scarf screamed familiarity, like I had known it for ages. I looked up hopefully at Ignis. Prompto tag teamed him with me and he caved.

“I don’t see why not,” he finally said. Prompto cheered and I clapped. Once the clothes were in the bag and we were out the door, I thanked them profusely. “It’s no trouble at all. We don’t know how long you’ll be with us, so it’s only natural that you’ll need more than one pair of clothes.”

“Still, you didn’t have to,” I said. “Thanks. Um, where exactly am I going to keep it?”

“Noct will keep it in his armiger. It’s no problem.”

“Armiger? Is that the magic thing?”

“It is. No doubt you read of the royal family’s abilities in your book?”

“A bit, but it’s one thing reading about it.”

“Agreed.” He pushed his glasses up. I did the same. Prompto bounded up to my side.

“So, you’ve got a phone, right?” he asked. “We should all exchange numbers!”

“Okay,” I said amicably. They really were the nicest guys. Once we reached the motel room, where Gladio and Noctis were waiting, we did just that. I gained four new numbers, and almost cried at the names in my contact list. Hopefully I could return home someday. But for now, I needed to distract myself and push those feelings down.

“Think we should show her King’s Knight?” Gladio suggested.

“Hell yes!” Prompto punched the air. “You’re gonna love it!”

“...King’s… Knight?” I stretched out. “Is that a game?”

“Only the greatest mobile app to sweep the generation,” Noctis advertised. “But… no telling if you’ll actually be able to download it.”

I swiftly connected to the Wi-Fi. My phone was compatible with that, at least. The Astrals or whatever they were called definitely picked the right world or universe from which to kidnap someone. All the base apps I had (music app and app app were the only ones I really paid attention to) had somehow adapted accordingly. I wasn’t sure if that was the influence of their gods or not. Either way, the boys showed me the magic of King’s Knight that night. Or should I say “knight”?


	4. He Gave Them The Heebie Jeebies. He Had Nothing Else To Give.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The road trip brings many experiences with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Just put a feather duster in a coffee filter.  
> Boom.  
> You’ve got Ardyn.”  
> -Pippiuscattius, giving me the best mental  
> image

I had insisted on sleeping on that couch that night. There were only two beds and I was used to lounging on a couch after school anyway. Even though it was summer vacation when I had suddenly appeared here, the sofa was always my friend.

I was awake longer than the other four. Once dinner had been eaten and the lights had gone out, I just stared into the darkness. My thoughts drifted to a conversation that happened not long before.

“So how old are you?” Prompto had asked.

“Turned twenty about a month ago,” I said. I learned Noct and Prompto were the same age. Gladio and Ignis were a little older.

That had got me thinking about the small birthday party I’d had and my family and friends. Would I ever see them again? This whole “other world” thing had me so confused. I still kept the mindset of it being an extended vacation, but that wouldn’t work for much longer. The longer I stayed here, the more I realized just how different this place really was. The currency, the Astrals, the countries, the history, they were all things I didn’t recognize and that drew me back down to Earth - er, Eos.

I unlocked my phone. My thumb hovered over the Messages app for a second before tapping it. I went to the conversation between me and my mother. I typed out a quick “hey” and sent it before I chickened out.

The message never went through. A few tears escaped me, but I let my throat go dry so I wouldn’t sob and wake the others. I turned to face the back of the couch. The Crown City might be miles away, but insomnia was with me that night.

A cute little tune woke me from uneven sleep. I had never been one to sleep without waking up a million times, but last night was awful. A couple of the boys snored (I had a hunch Gladio was the loudest), and my emotions were a changing whirlwind that liked to keep me up. I tugged the blanket up further around me and snuggled into it.

Gladio and Ignis gave sleepy greetings to each other. I heard someone else get up not long after. Prompto’s voice came from them as he knocked on the bathroom door. Someone was taking a shower in there.

“Gonna be awhile?” he asked. Gladio answered that he was almost done. I drifted into dozing. I heard Prompto sit down. “How long you wanna bet it will take Noct to wake up?”

“Hopefully before noon,” Ignis said. “Although it seems ______ might give him a run for his money.”

I could feel their eyes on me. I started a small daydream to get me back to sleep. That man Minnie had talked about before was in it. He had intrigued me.

“You think she’ll be okay?” Prompto asked, lowering his tone.

“No telling. She seems alright after her episode, but that’s easily a mask. I have a feeling she’s doing her best to distract herself. Honestly, I don’t blame her.”

“I feel really bad for her. I’d hate to wake up in a random world I’d never heard of before.”

“Same here. That is why we should do everything we can to help make her comfortable. Hopefully Lady Lunafreya will be able to help.”

“Yeah, that’d be really nice. I can’t believe she’s marrying Noct…”

The lump in my throat had returned. I don’t think anyone had ever been so nice to me before. It was too good to be true. Was everyone in this world as nice as them? Surely they all had their bad sides. But we had just become friends. No need to rush things, I told myself. I forced the tears away.

_Bury them,_ I thought. _If you ignore it, it will go away._

_You don’t deserve their help._

_Shut up._

_They’re better off without you._

_They’ve gone out of their way to make sure I know it’s no problem._

_They’re lying._

_Shut up!_

_They’re just trying to get rid of you quickly._

_I said shut up!!_

The bathroom door opened. I could smell the steam from the shower. One of my cheeks felt wet. Damn. Guess I’ll die.

“Prince still asleep?” Gladio’s rough voice came from the open door.

“The lady as well,” Ignis stated.

“Two sleeping beauties. Want me to wake ‘em up?”

“You take Noct. I think _____ will need a gentler approach.”

I heard the bathroom door close as Prompto went in and footsteps coming towards me. The shuffle of fabric sounded from Ignis crouching down to inspect me.

“Oh, drat,” he muttered.

“What?” Gladio asked from the other side of the room.

“She’s been crying.”

“What, again?”

“It’s hardly her fault.”

“I know, but… Wish there was more we could do.”

“Unfortunately, this is all we _can_ do at the moment.”

A hand was on my shoulder and I was shaken softly. I let out a small groan and pulled the blanket up.

“Time to wake up.”

I heard sheets being torn from a bed.

“What the hell?” came Noct’s raspy morning voice.

“Rise and shine, princess,” said Gladio’s.

“Time is it…?”

“9:30. Now come on, we got places to be. Don’t wanna leave your bride waiting, do ya?”

_“Definitely_ too early,” I muttered. Noctis agreed with me from the bed. Ignis tried shaking me again. I pulled the blanket over my head.

“Come now, even Noct is up,” said Ignis.

“That’s his problem…”

Ignis laughed quietly.

“Hey, if I have to be up, you have to be up,” Noctis protested sleepily.

“Not my fault I’m not a morning person,” I told him.

“Move over, Specs, I’ll get her up.”

“Now, Noct, I’m not sure that’s a-” Ignis started. The air was suddenly freezing as my blanket was ripped from me. I shot up and grabbed at it.

“No-!” I cried. “It’s cold!”

“Suffer with me!” Noctis demanded, pulling the blanket.

“Careful, you’ll tear it.” Ignis’ words went ignored.

“I already am suffering!” I whined. Noct paused, unsure how to respond. Just as I gave a final tug, Gladio swooped in and confiscated the blanket.

“That’s enough, you two,” he said. “You’re fighting like siblings.”

I slouched in defeat. Noct pouted a little.

“They’re both picky eaters and like to sleep in,” Ignis observed. “They might as well be.”

I glared at Noctis and he glared back. I put my glasses back on to further my point. He relented and looked away. Prompto came out of the bathroom.

“Everything okay out here?” he asked.

“Serving justice,” Noctis said. I kept glaring at him.

“Uh, okay.”

Ignis got my attention and let me have the bathroom to change. I walked out to find the others ready to go. We left the motel and found a nice place for breakfast. I didn’t eat much - breakfast isn’t really my thing unless there are pancakes or biscuits - and by the time we were finished, it was almost midday.

When we reached the car, a bark rang out and a black dog came trotting up to Noctis. The brown stripe on its muzzle and its eyebrows made it look angry but it seemed nice enough. I noticed there was a sort of harness around it. Where was its owner?

“Umbra!” Noctis gasped.

“Bringin’ us stuff,” Prompto said. “Atta boy!”

“That dog can really track a scent,” Gladio said.

“Certainly ‘nose’ how to find us,” Ignis joked subtly. I laughed.

“Hope he didn’t have a ‘ruff’ time,” I shot back. I received a smile from them. “C-Can- Can I pet him?”

“Sure,” Noct said, taking something from the harness. It was a notebook. I crouched down with him and let Umbra sniff my hand. He seemed to perk up and snorted at me. I gave him a few pets. His fur was quite soft.

As Noct wrote something in the notebook and placed something inside it, Ignis explained to me that Umbra was one of Lady Lunafreya’s two dogs. Umbra delivered this notebook back and forth and Pryna, a white dog, stayed by her side.

“I know,” Prompto whined. “You’re not gonna tell me.”

“Then don’t ask,” Noct said sternly.

“What was that about?”

Noct sighed, frustrated.

“You don’t say.”

Prompto and I had forgotten our deal and I sat between Noct and Gladio again. I continued reading the history book Cid had gotten me, but it was getting a bit boring now that stability had been reached in Lucis. I closed the book and looked at the landscape around me. The desert setting was giving way to green grass and tall trees.

As we drove on, they turned on the radio to listen to the Oracle give a short speech. She promised that her marriage would not get in the way of her calling and that she would continue to bless everyone. She certainly seemed like a good person, kind and compassionate. I was glad I was going to see her. Surely she could help me. The radio announcer stated that her duties as Oracle would be suspended during that time. Prompto questioned it being in the treaty. I listened, intrigued.

“Of course,” Ignis confirmed. “A simple formality.”

“One of those ‘symbol of the peace’ deals,” Gladio added.

“So it’s more like a… marriage of convenience,” Prompto said.

“Her Ladyship seems nevertheless amenable to the prospect,” said Ignis.

“And Noct here likes the idea,” Gladio teased. The Prince gave an exasperated sigh. I smiled.

“What’s that?” Prompto asked. “‘I do?’”

“Buzz off,” Noct said. I giggled.

“I ship it,” I said softly.

“Come on, you too?”

“Aha! He admits it!” Prom said.

“How is that admitting it?”

“You’re not denying it.”

“I said, buzz off.”

We turned a corner and drove under a natural rocky arch. I saw Prompto snap a picture. The previous evening, he had shown everyone the pictures he had taken. There were a few with me in it. I was a bit embarrassed, but otherwise didn’t mind too much.

We turned onto a road to our left and the glistening ocean was in view.

“I see the sea!”

“I ‘sea’ it, too!” Noct and I said simultaneously. We high-fived. I may have only known these guys for a day, but I was already feeling comfortable, and that’s saying something. I’m already a quiet person, but with strangers I’m even quieter. But these four? They felt like long lost family I’d never even knew I had. Is that weird? I really hoped it wasn’t.

“That’s Galdin Quay,” Ignis said. So _that_ was where my dream had taken place.

“Kinda want to go for a dip,” Gladio voiced.

“That a big mountain behind it?” Noctis asked. I looked and my heart almost left my chest.

“That’s the island from my dream!” I exclaimed. Three heads turned toward me, and Ignis glanced at me through the rearview mirror. “The angel wings island.”

“Angel wings?”

“There was… I can’t…”

As I tried to remember, my head started pounding. It was like a prisoner trying to escape from inside my skull. Why did that island bring out such a bad feeling? I clutched at my temples.

“Everything alright?” Gladio asked.

“I can’t… I can’t remember,” I managed to get out. “It hurts to think about.”

“That is alarming,” Ignis mumbled. “Is it only when you try to remember?”

“Y-yeah… I’ll try later.”

“Don’t strain yourself.”

“Nobody goes to Galdin for an island, though,” Prompto cut in, thankfully saving me from more bad thoughts. “They go to kick back, and get massages.”

“And savor the seafood,” Ignis added. I wrinkled my nose. I had never liked seafood. Except fish sticks when I was really little. Those I used to like. “It’s famously delicious.”

“Sounds great,” Noctis said. We pulled into the parking lot. Surprisingly, there weren’t many cars. We got a good spot in a shaded area. “Nice.”

I was so glad I was no longer pressed against two guys in black in a hot car on a hot day. Sure, it was a convertible, but the wind can only do much. I stretched my arms up and out. A sea breeze lazily blew by, spreading the scent of salt water and sand. Yep. Beach.

We made our way to the boardwalk. My heart was fluttering in my chest now that I was so near the island. I toyed with the thought of asking someone about it. My anxiety said no, but my curiosity said yes. Maybe Ignis could help.

As we made our way to the little pier-slash-beach-resort, I took in the bright blue water and palm trees that were in the middle of the ocean for some reason. Another difference for this world. The sky above was dashed with white cloud. The air still smelled of salt and sand. I thought of a friend back home who adored the ocean and all its eccentricities. She would have loved this. Having reached the resort, I slowed down, wondering if I should take pictures of this place or not. I whipped out my phone and did so. No way was I passing up on evidence of being in another universe.

I made sure to get extras of the island. I decided to call it the Angel’s Island because of the wings.

“Welcome to Galdin Quay!”

I jerked around to see an employee greeting me. The others were up ahead. Oops. Gotta go fast and catch up.

“U-um, thanks,” I told the greeter awkwardly. I sped up, near power walking. In my hurry, I didn’t realize my friends were talking to someone. “Sorry I was lagging behind-”

“-ready to turn shi-”

I bumped into someone. I stumbled back as the person attempted to steady me.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to-” I stuttered. “I’m sorry.”

“The fault is all mine,” the odd man said. Heart fluttering in embarrassment, I let Gladio pull me over and behind him. Odd Man took another step forward. Then he swiftly turned around as something left his hand. Gladio caught it. It was a coin of some sort.

“What is this?” he asked suspiciously. “Some sort of souvenir?”

“Consider it your allowance,” said Handsome Stranger.

“Oh yeah?” Gladio was now in full Shield mode. “And who’s ‘allowing’ us?”

Odd Man spread his arms wide, walking backward.

“A man of no consequence,” he stated matter-of-factly. He gave me one last glance before turning back around. We watched as he left.

“Well that was weird,” I said awkwardly. 

“Yeah, no kidding,” Prompto agreed.


	5. Spem habeo, sed meae cogitationes desperationem adducunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dear Reader starts to give back to the others for helping her.

Galdin Quay was a fancy place. The whole air about it was a luxurious tropical feeling. The straw roof felt authentic and planted island foliage gave off a sweet scent that mixed with the ocean breeze. We passed by a nice looking restaurant. I wondered if they’d have food I’ll actually eat. The smell of fish drifted away and salt took its place as we descended down some stairs at the back of the pier.

I looked out at the Angel’s Island. It looked majestic yet intimidating in the distance. I really needed to find someone or something to tell me about it. The suspense would kill me if I didn’t find out.

“Aw, man.” Prompto’s voice snapped the tracks of my train of thought. “Not a ship in sight. What gives?”

The small strip of wood they called a dock was really underwhelming. I had seen small squares bigger than this. Color me unimpressed.

We made to head back upstairs but another odd looking guy cut us off. Unlike the first man, this one gave me bad vibes. My instincts screamed “how bout no?”

“According to my sources,” said a guy whose hair reminded me of Ignis. I nearly snorted at his accent. Was it Brooklyn? If he said anything remotely stereotypical, I would have to vacate the premises. Or maybe not. Maybe I shouldn’t think things like that. “The empire, giving strict orders not to let any vessels leave the docks of Altissia.”

 _Fuck,_ I thought. _One more thing keeping me from this Lunafreya person._

“Real shame if you were late to your wedding - right, Prince Noctis? Name’s Dino, by the way. Pleasure.”

Yep, I really didn’t like this guy. I wasn’t sure if we were supposed to remain incognito about Noctis but the way this guy spoke said, yes, we were, and someone had had blown our cover. Or - Noctis’ cover, at least. But - shouldn’t people know what he looks like anyway?

Dino went on to criticize my new friends’ bounty-hunting escapades. I wanted to tell him to mind his own business, but I kept my mouth shut, unlike him. Then he mentioned he was a reporter. I knew there was something I didn’t like about him. He said he integrity and would meep the secret - in exchange for a favor.

 _How is that integrity?_ I felt my eye twitch in annoyance. Everything about this “Dino” made me want to tell him off. But my shyness and anxiety said no, bad idea.

“All you gotta do is find me some rough gemstones,” Dino went on. A reported who’s also a jeweler? That sounded ridiculous. It was just the way he carried himself. I could feel another headache coming on, and not from my missing memories.

As we went back out to the car, I realized they were actually doing this. Seriously? I suppose they didn’t really have a choice. But at the time, Dino was still on my nerves.

“You okay?” Gladio asked. I didn’t notice how tense I was.

“I don’t like that guy,” I spoke bluntly.

“Yeah, me neither.”

Ignis said that we best not make him our enemy. We piled in the car and I pulled out my headphones. Music was always good for calming down. The sweet sounds of Coldplay never failed to lift my spirits. With one last glance at Angel’s Island, we were off.

 

I wasn’t sure what I was expecting, but when Ignis pulled over in the middle of nowhere, I thought we had broken down again.

“Uh, where are we?” I asked uneasily.

“This is the place Dino marked on the map,” Ignis answered.

“So he just… somehow knew where some random gems are hanging out?”

“It would seem so, yes.”

_Seeing the Oracle is getting to be a real hassle._

Noctis led us up over the mountains. Every so often some pointy looking dogs would come out and attack. At first, I hid and watched but then I realized none of them seemed to target me, so I began waiting on the side. I felt utterly useless.

_You are useless._

_Not helping._

Finally, after hours of walking and climbing that left me more winded than an orchestra, we made it to relatively even ground. However… the humongous bird we had seen before was nesting right in front of us. I had never seen an animal that large. Prompto took the words right out of my mouth.

“Oh em gee,” he somewhat whispered. His voice was higher than usual. “We supposed to get _near_ that thing?”

“Pipe down before you wake it up,” Gladio scolded. Good thing I was good at being quiet.

“Do you guys want me to get it?” I asked. They looked at me like I’d grown another head. “I’m smaller and much quieter.”

“A fair point…” Ignis began.

“...But not happening,” Noctis stated. I slowed my breathing down and remained silent to prove my point. I was useless before, but not now. Maybe my years of submissive silence in response to negative social interactions would finally come in handy. “I know what you’re trying to do. You’re not going alone.”

“I don’t know,” Gladio said. “Let the girl prove herself.”

“The hell? You can’t be serious.”

“Maybe not, but she is.”

At this point I was sizing the bird up. It was enormous and at least the size of a whale. It was sleeping deeply, though, and at home I was very good at sneaking around. My house’s floorboards were squeaky and I learned where to step so as not to alert my parents I was up later than I should be. Midnight snacks are soul food.

“Besides, all five of us would just make more noise,” I whispered. “I’m expendable.”

“The hell you are-” Noctis protested, but Ignis stopped him.

“You’re not expendable,” he said. “None of us are. Noct, why don’t we let Gladio go with her?”

“I…”

War was going on inside his head. I later found out they felt responsible for me seeing as they had found me. Little did I know at the time that a family of four had just adopted me.

“Ugh, fine, but if you’re not back in fifteen minutes, we’re coming over,” Noct decided. I smiled. Gladio nodded.

“Lead the way,” he said. I slipped my jacket and handed it to Prompto. The jinging of the zipping made me nervous.

“Guard this with your life,” I told him. My jacket has always been my security blanket. I only ever take it off in extreme circumstances, like this one.

Arms shaking and feet light, I slowly stepped out from under the natural rocky arch we had been under. I didn’t bother crouching like the others. I wouldn’t need to if I stayed quiet. Besides, keeping myself upright would take more focus than on stealth.

Step by creeping step, I made my way out of the shadows. The only sound was the wind and the soft crunching of grass whenever Gladio and I took a step. I forced myself to control my breathing as we neared the bird’s beak. The beak had _teeth. Teeth._ I bit my lip. Just keep moving.

As Gladio kept an eye on the Roc, I focused on the ground and placing steps where there wouldn’t be much sound. I stepped over bunches of weeds and longer grass strands. My feet skirted around stones in the ground. The bird’s small snores overpowered the grass being squished beneath our feet.

Then it ruffled its feathers. I felt a hand on my shoulder and I stopped. I could practically the others worry increase. I was halfway there. The alcove of rocks was almost within reach. I saw the creature’s tail lying behind it. That could pose a problem if it moved. Once the bird was settled, we kept going and going and going and-

I let out a sigh. I was being helpful and was _not_ fucking things up. Gladio picked a few stones and pocketed them. He nodded for me to lead the way back. We snuck back around. The bird startled a few times, but never woke. The arch and our friends were in sight.

Right as I stepped back into the shade, a huge gust of wind nearly swept me off my feet. Gladio pulled me back and we cowered near the ground as the bird spread all six of its dark wings and-

Just fucking left. It just left. It flew away and never came back. I straightened myself out and let the longest sigh. My heart was racing. My palms were sweating. I hadn’t even realized.

“Off it goes,” Ignis said. He and the other two came out and we all watched it fly away into a cliche but fitting sunset.

“How are you so damn _quiet?”_ Noctis asked. “The _bird_ was louder than you.”

“I have no idea,” I said, slightly laughing at the thought that _I was still alive._ “I’m never doing that again.”

“Hopefully you won’t have to,” Gladio said, patting me on the back. “But you did good.”

I smiled, happy I had finally done something to repay their kindness. It was the least I could do, I felt. Prompto handed me my jacket and I put it back on and snuggled into it. A few more congratulations and praises went around - I had a feeling they were trying to make me feel more welcome and comfortable. It was…nice.

“Noct, night is falling,” Ignis said. We all hurried back to the car. It was much shorter trip than the way up. Ignis drove a little ways and stopped again. In the distance was another blue runed mound. We made our way up there. This was where we made camp. I didn’t know how to feel about that. I used to like camping but as I grew older, the outdoors were just not for me. But the guys were sweet and had gotten me a sleeping bag when I wasn’t looking.

Once the campfire was started, Ignis began preparing dinner. I looked around. No one was getting up to help him. I sat for a moment. I felt like I should help. The more useful I was, the better I would feel, but thing is, I have little to no cooking experience. I can bake pretty well, but that’s it. Yet… Ignis seemed kinda lonely over there. Prompto and Noctis were playing around with the former’s camera. Gladio had just finished with the tent and was sitting, watching them.

Heart fluttering, I approached the chef.

“Um,” I hummed quietly, unsure of what to say. His head turned toward me. “I um, don’t have much- much experience- but… do you any help?”

_Real smooth._

Ignis smiled. “I could always use an extra pair of hands.”

I wasn’t really sure what we were making, but I was cutting vegetables as carefully as I could. Something was cooking on the campsite grill and after a little while, the scent of steak filled my nose. Oh, yes. Steak has always been one of my favorite foods.

“How are you getting on?” Ignis asked.

“Umm.” I thought for a moment. “Okay, I guess. This place doesn’t feel much different from home.”

“But…?”

“The more I think about it, I just kinda realize it is.”

I could see him nod in the corner of my eye. I finished chopping a carrot (yeugh) and began on another. My voice quieted to a mutter.

“Once I get used to something, something else comes around and says ‘how ‘bout no’, like that bird.”

“In our defense, our birds aren’t usually that large.”

I shrugged. I would accept it with time.

“But still… Are you sure you’re alright? I believe I speak for us all when I say that the stunt you pulled earlier was concerning. You don’t seem the reckless type.”

“I like to say I’m cautiously reckless, if that makes sense.”

“Can’t say I’ve heard the term before, but yes.”

A few minutes passed by. The other three were chattering behind us. I think they were playing King’s Knight. I didn’t know how they were getting any signal. I glanced over my shoulder to see. I misjudged where I was placing my hand. A sharp pain stung my thumb. I let out a pained squeak, and looked to see red welling out of a small cut. I quickly put the knife down. There were no napkins or paper towels in sight. I began to panic. Finger/hand injuries had always disturbed me greatly.

“Ah…” I hissed. I tried to wipe the blood away. It hurt so much to touch.

“Here,” Ignis said. He handed me a small white cloth. So he had tissues. Good to know.

“Sorry…”

His brows furrowed. “Whatever for?”

Another pained gasp left me as I gently dabbed the wound. “Um…” There was no blood on the cutting board. Ignis was wiping the knife off, so no harm done there. “I… don’t know.”

_Dammit why do you have to worry them with your stupid issues?_

“Then there’s nothing to apologize for.”

“I guess not.”

“Noct, do we have a spare potion?”

“What? Why?” the Prince asked. “Cut yourself?”

“I did,” I announced with a small voice. Footsteps approached. A small teal container entered my field of vision. I blinked at it.

“Take it,” Noctis said.

“What is it?”

“A potion. You crush it.”

I set the tissue down and took the… potion? It looked like someone had taken a water bottle and rounded out the bottom. It didn’t seem crushable either. I hesitantly put more pressure into my grip.

“You gotta try harder than that.”

“Won’t I break it?”

“Well, yeah, that’s the point.”

“Oh. Okay. So…”

My mind went “fuck it” and I crushed the small water bottle potion. It exploded in a burst if blue particles and the cut on my thumb closed up, leaving no mark behind.

“That’s _so cool.”_

Ignis and Noctis looked amused. When I asked it worked, Noct looked stumped as if he didn’t use magic on a daily basis. Ignis didn’t really know either, but tried his best to provide theories. I also learned there were Hi-Potions and Elixirs and Hi-Elixirs. I would get to see them later, but they looked the same except for the colors.

Soon after that, dinner was served. Noctis and I picked at the veggies. I did my my best to down some so as to make sure I looked grateful. Ignis had to coax the prince into eating his. The steak was amazing, though. It was perfectly cooked and the chef seemed proud that it was being enjoyed.

Prompto showed us the pictures he had taken that day. He had gotten a couple good ones of the giant bird. One featured me and Gladio sneaking around it. A few of the boys fighting caught my attention. How had Prompto had the time to take those? Then there was a cozy, firelit photo of Ignis and I making dinner and my amazed face at the potion’s healing qualities.

My place in the tent was hard to determine. It was rather small, already a tight fit for the four before me. I opted to sleep wherever I wouldn’t get in the way. The day had been rather tiring, so most of us were ready to turn in early. I felt lucky to have the blanket from that morning. It was comforting and warm.

It was difficult to fall asleep. Gladio was snoring up a storm. My thoughts wouldn’t quiet down. It felt hard to breathe. My anxieties were catching up to me and before I knew it, my body was crawling out of the tent. The campfire was just embers now. There wasn’t much need to watch it as our whole camp was set on a mound of stone. I made my way to the edge of it and sat down, legs crossed.

The open sky was a welcome sight. But what was bothering was lack of the Milky Way in an untainted view. Stars were numerous and in no way countable. There wasn't any way to tell where in the universe this planet was located. Clearly it was far, far from Earth or NASA or some space agency would’ve found it already.

Unrecognizable constellations littered the empty expanse of black. Try as I might, there was no recreating the Big Dipper or Orion’s Belt. My eyes searched every corner I could. A lump caught in my throat, but I forced it down. This was supposed to be comforting. Space had always made me feel better.

A soft breeze blew by, rustling the grass around the Oracle Runes. A hand traced the blue markings, knowing it had been here for hundreds of years. That was a nice thought. These runes were here keep people safe. Off in the distance was a bright red flame. A daemon, probably. There were all sorts. Maybe I’d be able to find a book or something about them.

The rocky scent of the wilderness and weak smell of embers filled the air. It had been so long since I’d actually been camping. I still couldn’t say I liked it, but it was all we had. Complaining wasn’t something I felt I should do. There wasn’t any other place we could go and I was lucky to have found the only four people on this world that were willing to help me.

If only I’d had a telescope. Maybe I could’ve attempted and failed to map out the stars. How many were actually stars? Were there any other planets nearby? Satellites? Nebulae? I knew deep in my heart that nothing was coming to find me. Well, nothing except-

“Hey.” A voice startled me out of my thoughts. Someone eased themself down beside me. I glanced over to see Noctis yawning. “You know what time it is…?”

I shook my head. It didn’t really matter to me at that moment.

“What’re you doing out here?”

“Stargazing,” I answered quietly, pulling my blanket closer. “Couldn’t sleep.”

“Gladio too loud for ya?”

“...A bit. My thoughts are louder.”

“Yeah, I get that.”

A comfortable silence settled over us. I could head Noctis scratching at the ground. My gaze went out to the moving darkness in front. More daemons, I guessed. I looked back up to the sky.

“Hey, Noctis…?” I asked softly. My voice was almost carried away by the wind.

“Yeah?”

“What kind of constellations do you have?”

“Constellations? Uh…”

His eyes turned towards the heavens as well. After a few moments, I learned of the handful he knew about. The pattern of Leviathan could be seen that night. Shiva, too. We could also see half of Ramuh and a small bunch of stars that represented the crystal.

“So there’s a crystal and a ring?” I asked. “Is the ring a good thing or is it a symbol of temptation that will lead to the inevitable downfall of Sauron?”

“Uh, what?” He sounded so confused. I laughed.

“There’s a small series of books where I’m from called ‘Lord of the Rings.’ Never go to war over jewelry. Or gems. That never ends well.”

“Oh. Wish the Empire knew that...”

“Empires fall. Can’t say when, but they all do.”

“That from personal experience?”

“Not really. But Earth has had more than its fair share of wars and empires. History repeats itself, you know.”

“Wish it didn’t. I’d hate for anyone in the future to have to go through this too.”

“So do all who live to see such times. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us. Gandalf, Lord of the Rings.”

“You really are a nerd, huh.”

“So are you and your friends.”


	6. Mea desperatio quo amicorum vincitur

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A tragedy befalls the boys and Dear Reader discovers something odd about herself.

I was awoken that morning by the voices of Gladiolus and Noctis. They were arguing about something. I wasn’t sure what it was about, but it wasn’t an all out shouting match. I was the only one left in the tent so I assumed breakfast was being made. That meant I could sleep a bit longer.

Just as I had snuggled into my blanket, I heard Noctis give a command to Prompto.

“Prom, tell him where he can stick his grapes,” said the prince. There was a pause.

“Um, in the fridge?” came Prompto’s innocent voice.

“Prom, no-”

The argument was dissolved as a girl’s laughter broke the air. They all looked to the tent. I was much too tired and waking up to such an exchange was much too amusing. I was curled into myself, shaking from laughing so hard. Of all the things I could wake up to, it was _that._

They were chattering amicably once more as I dragged myself out of the tent. My hair was a mess from tossing and turning all night. My faded turquoise blanket was wrapped around me. I felt and probably looked like a bog witch.

“Good morning,” Ignis greeted. I groaned and shielded my eyes from the harsh sunlight. The smell of bacon wafted through the air. “Sleep well? Noct told me you were up late.”

I glanced at the prince. He shrugged and said, “Not even the alarm would wake you up.”

“Yeah,” I sighed. “Ground’s uncomfortable, though.”

“Better for your back,” Gladio said.

“Not mine. I’m hypersensitive. This blanket is warm, though.”

I sat down with them in one of the chairs. I listened to as they talked about nothing. After breakfast, we made our way back to the car and were soon in Galdin Quay again.

It was almost noon when we arrived. The sun was heating up the land and my jacket was becoming uncomfortable. I contemplated taking it off. It wasn’t hot enough yet. I still needed it to keep the anxiety from getting worse.

As we neared the resort, I spotted a familiar face.

“Cat!” I exclaimed. I rushed forward to pet a small white kitty. She seemed sweet and sniffed my hand. Then she rubbed against it, welcoming me. I sat down on the pier, legs crossed. The cat sniffed my legs and slowly climbed into my lap. My heart felt so light. _I had been chosen._ This was the best part of my stay, hands down.

Noctis crouched down beside me, smiling softly.

“Hey, buddy,” he cooed. “Takin’ a little stroll?”

The cat meowed at him. I aww’d and scratched behind her ears.

“Makin’ new friends? How come you’re all alone?”

She mewed again. What a friendly feline! She was purring now. My hand kept moving, administering all the pets it could muster.

“Must be hungry.”

“Meow!”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. Hold on a sec. I’ll find you something.”

Noct stood up, ready to feed the cat. Ignis reminded him that we had unfinished business.

“You guys go on ahead,” I told them. “I am morally obligated not to move.”

The cat in my lap agreed. After about fifteen minutes, they came back. The little kitty got up and stretched before climbing out of my lap. I felt disappointed but my legs were happy. I gave her another few strokes before standing up.

“How’d it go?” I asked.

“We got a boat,” Noctis explained. “And some rooms for the night.”

“Nice.”

“We also learned that strange man we met yesterday might be from the Empire,” Ignis said. “It would be wise to remain wary of him should we cross paths again. But for now, we can relax. The boat won’t arrive until tomorrow.”

“We gotta come up with some cat food,” Noctis said. Prompto suggested fishing for some. These guys had fishing rods? I followed them back down the walkway and onto the beach. I was glad to be wearing shoes that didn’t let sand in easily. The worst feeling is always something in your shoe. Or a wet sock. Or both at the same time.

There was a fishing spot not far from the parking lot. Noctis looked excited. That confused me. I’d thought Gladio would be the one for this since he was good in the wild and all. I watched as the prince summoned a fishing rod.

“Wait, we’re actually _fishing?”_ I asked.

“Oh, yeah!” Noct confirmed, casting a line. “‘S’been way too long since I last did this.”

I looked to Ignis and then to the other two.

“So… you’re telling me the prince of an entire kingdom… likes _fishing?”_

Noctis met my eyes. He held contact and cast a line. “Yeah.”

This was going to be a long trip.

Once Noct actually got a bite, the others were pretty into it. I, on the other hand, just stood there. Either he’d get it or he wouldn’t. And he did. Noctis pulled up a fish about the size of a plate. Apparently it was good enough. He carried the poor thing back to the resort and when the cat wouldn’t eat it raw, to speak with the chef at the restaurant.

 _I guess Ignis can’t make cat food,_ I thought.

“You got anything a cat might like?” Noctis asked Coctura, the cook.

“That the best pick up line you got?” she asked back, unimpressed. I snorted. Noct rubbed the back of his neck.

“I- There’s this… cat over there.”

Coctura was nice and helped us out. Noct carried the plate over to the cat, who pranced happily around our feet.

“Here ya go, buddy,” he said, placing it down. The cat began to eat, contentedly purring.

“She’s so sweet,” I gushed. “Precious.”

“You’re one spoiled cat.”

“Aww, I think she likes you!” Prompto said. We spent a few more minutes with her before going to check out the rooms Dino had been kind enough to get for us.

What we had was a small living space with one bed and doors leading to other rooms. I felt so lucky to have my own bed that night. The we decided to spend the rest of the day however we wanted. I changed shirts - I now wore the moogle one - and went to see if I could find any information about Angel’s Island.

The only problem was that I was too nervous to talk to anyone. Maybe there was a brochure or something I could read. I found a whole rack near the front but none of looked like they could help me. My eyes looked around at all the people sitting and eating. Definitely not going to ask them. I wandered back to the area with a roof. Ignis was sitting at the place we had gotten the cat food. I approached him quietly, noting that he was writing.

“Um, Ignis?” I spoke shyly once he had finished. He looked up at me.

“Ah, I had wondered where you had got off to,” he said. “Did you need something?”

I sat down next to him, staring at the table for a second.

“Do you know anything about that island?” I asked, struggling to make eye contact. Gotta remember people like that.

“The island?” He turned to look for it. “Can’t say I do, to be honest. Coctura?”

The chef from earlier’s attention was caught.

“What can you tell us about that island off the coast?”

My improvised name was not far off. It was called Angelgard and the gods used to convene there before they went to sleep. That raised several questions regarding my dream and purpose here. When Coctura told us people generally didn’t go near it and those that did rarely returned, Ignis and I exchanged a glance. Red flags were parading in both our heads.

After that explanation, he led me back to the hotel room so we could speak more privately. I got another headache trying to remember just what my dream had been about.

“Like it or not, the gods must have something to do with this,” Ignis said, pacing. “If you were there on that island, it’s no coincidence.”

“I did recognize it as soon as I saw it,” I muttered, thinking. I was sitting on a chair around the table. “But why? Why _me?”_

“It’s a possibility we may never know, not at the rate we’re going. But if I had to make a guess, I’d say it has something to do with our current situation. Things between Lucis and the Empire are more tense than they ever have been. Perhaps someone from the outside and therefore without bias can provide a better solution.”

“One problem.”

He stopped to meet my gaze.

“I _hate_ politics.”

“And that’s exactly why they would choose you. The less bias you have, the more accurate a solution.”

“No, no, no. My bias is _against_ politics. I’m by no means an anarchist; government and therefore politics are an essential part of life but I’d really want nothing to do with them personally.”

Ignis hummed, thinking. The door opened and in walked Gladiolus. Ignis was pacing again.

“Everything alright?” Gladio asked.

“We found out I was sent here because of divine intervention,” I explained lightly.

“Angelgard is where the gods once convened,” Ignis said. “And where Ramuh now rests. He used to pass judgment there.”

“Slow down,” Gladio said. “What’s Angelgard?”

“The island from my dream,” I answered. I point out the window. “And the one out there. Same place.”

“So you’re saying you’ve got some sort of divine right?”

“No, that’s Noctis. I just… fell, I guess. We don’t know why. Ignis thinks it might have to do with bringing true peace, but I don’t think so.”

“Huh. That’s pretty heavy.”

“Yep.”

“I just can’t imagine any other reason,” Ignis breathed, standing still now. “Why else would she come at such a time?”

“No idea,” Gladio said. “But we can’t rule out anything else just yet. Not until she remembers more.”

“It hurts to remember,” I said. “When I try, my skull aches.”

“Did you see anyone?” Ignis asked. “Or anything that might be a clue?”

I went over my dream up to the point where it started hurting. “There were swords… Really big ones. They made a circle. And then… A formation of some sort… Agh…”

My brain was throbbing. I could see the area clear as day in my mind. The giant swords and an opening in a hill nearby did not go away. I could remember turning to see something but why? Why did I turn?

“I think I heard something-”

A white hot pain shot through my head and I clutched at it. So I did hear something. The pain was all I could feel, though. I must be getting closer to an epiphany. Suddenly I saw Noctis came in and my thoughts and the pain went away. When I opened my eyes, Ignis was kneeling next to me. Gladio was standing behind him. Prompto and Noctis looked confused.

“What happened?” Noctis asked, worried. Gladio filled them in as Ignis checked to make sure I was okay.

“Does it still hurt?” he asked. I shook my head and told him it just went away when I stopped thinking of it. “Try not to think too much of it again just yet.”

I nodded, saying nothing. A few tears had leaked out. I wiped them away and cleaned my glasses.

“Hey, you okay?” Prompto asked. I nodded again. “Just let us know if there’s anything we can do, okay?”

“Yeah,” Noctis said. “Don’t sweat it.”

I smiled and thanked them before standing to go to my room. I spent the rest of the day reading my history book. I skipped ahead to the war between Niflheim and Lucis. I felt the need to catch up with that.

 _Iedolas?_ I thought. _How do you even pronounce that?_

The emperor was once kind and benevolent but as he grew older, his actions became more malicious. He appointed a chancellor, someone named Ardyn Izunia who had helped create the Magitek Infantry. Together they made Niflheim nigh unstoppable. I stopped at the death of the Oracle’s mother. The sun was setting and it was time for dinner.

The rest of the night was pretty relaxed. I distracted myself by playing King’s Knight with the boys and letting them teach me how to play card games. They quickly realized that I could easily be a quick study given the right circumstances. I may not have come first every time, but I came close. We ended the evening with a walk on the beach where we compared memes and discovered our generations’ same pull towards fatalistic humor. I went to sleep that night with mixed thoughts and a comfortable bed.

I was awoken that morning by Prompto. He told me I could stay in bed as long as I was awake. I was grateful and did just that. I decided to get up just as Noctis did. When he asked where I was, I opened my door and walked in.

“Hello,” I said sleepily, running a hand through my messy locks. I received greetings from three of them. Ignis was missing. When he came back, I had taken residence sitting on Noctis’ bed. His expression was unreadable. He was holding a newspaper in his hand. I had a feeling something was wrong.

“What’s that look for?” Noctis asked after his advisor stared at him for a second. Ignis handed the newspaper to Gladio.

“It’s in all the papers,” he muttered. I watched, concerned.

“What is?” Noctis prodded, impatient. The tension was almost palpable. Prompto read over Gladio’s shoulder.

“Insomnia… falls?” he read, disbelief lacing his words. My stomach dropped. Wasn’t that their capital city? Noctis gasped, asking if this was their idea of a joke.

“I need you to calm down so I can explain,” Ignis told him.

“I’m as calm as I’m gonna get!” Noctis said.

“There was an attack. The imperial army has taken the Crown City.”

_No. There’s no way. Now?_

“‘As treaty room tempers flared, blasts lit the night sky,’” Gladio read. “‘When the smoke about the Citadel cleared the king was found… dead.’”

My heart leapt with anxiety. The king was dead? What was going to happen now? Did that mean we were in imperial territory now? Were we safe?

“No, wait, hold on…” Noctis trailed.

“We had no way of knowing,” Ignis stated.

“What? Knowing what?”

“That the signing was last night. That Insomnia-”

“But the wedding! Altissia-!”

“I _know,_ that was the plan. Yet the reports of the invasion are all the same. How could every headline in the kingdom be wrong?”

“...Lies.”

“If only…” Prompto mumbled. A moment of silence passed. I could practically feel their emotions. The same thing that had happened to me had now happened to them.

“I’m sorry…” I whispered, hoping I could comfort them somehow. All I was met with was a glare.

“Did you know about this?” Noctis asked angrily. My eyes widened.

“What?”

_“Did you know about this?”_

I shook my head. “No! Of course not!”

“You sure? It wasn’t in that dream of yours? Nothing to warn us about it? You think you could just keep it from us-?”

“Noct, that’s enough,” Ignis interrupted firmly. “She had no way of knowing, either. She is not from this world and we have already established what she can and can't remember about her vision.”

Noct sat down as Gladio said that we couldn’t be sure until we had seen it with our own eyes. After a small exchange on the safety of said action, we hurried out to the car. I said nothing for a long while. It was raining and so the car’s top was up. It felt more cramped than usual. It was quiet for awhile until we were nearing the border.

I didn’t know what to say. I wasn’t sure there was anything I could do. I wanted to offer comfort but I didn’t want to make anything worse. So I kept my head down and said nothing.

“I hope everyone’s okay,” Prompto said.

“Lotta good hoping’s gonna do,” Noctis sighed.

“You mustn’t lose faith,” Ignis said.

“Really? Can faith stop a fleet of imperial dreadnoughts?”

“Give it a rest,” Gladio grumbled. His father had died defending the king.

“My old man had plenty of faith!”

Noct’s voice was thick, signaling to me that tears were on their way. I tried placing a hand on his shoulder. He shrugged it off. All we had right now was lies. The empire had lied about the ceasefire and the treaty.

Another thirty minutes passed in silence. I respectfully kept my distance. As we neared the border, a group of large airships flew overhead.

“Look at the size of those things,” Gladio pointed out.

“Imperial dreadnoughts,” Ignis explained, “they transport soldiers, namely the Magitek infantry.”

“The things the chancellor made?” I asked quietly, recalling my history lesson from the previous day. I couldn’t remember his name, but the award had stuck with me.

“Precisely. Massed produced humanoid weapons of warfare.”

I shuddered at the thought.

“Doesn’t look like they’ll be signing that peace treaty,” Prompto said. Another few minutes passed and soon we came to an inspection point. There was a convenient way around, a dirt path to our left, so Ignis turned and took that. When we reached a dead end, he stopped the car and we got out. I had my hood up to shield my glasses from the rain so I could see.

There was a decent vantage point up ahead, so all five of us raced up the stairs of the wall. Magitek soldiers were patrolling the area. The boys decided to take out their anger on them. I didn’t blame them.

“Stay out of the way,” Noctis told me. “Last thing we need is someone else getting hurt.”

I patiently waited as they took out the robot things and followed them to the back. Four Insomnians and an alien weaved their way through the structure, the former wiping out all the soldiers they could find. Then they came to a rocky walkway swarming with Magitek. They even had snipers. I did my best to stay out of their line of vision.

Noctis was warping like crazy, hitting every soldier he saw. He was the only one besides Prompto who could take out the ones that were higher up. Ignis and Gladiolus worked together to protect Noct, striking down the ones he didn’t get. I stayed out of sight and therefore out of mind.

And then I heard Prompto cry out. The others were too far away to get to him in time. Noctis killed the sniper who had got him. Prompto was clutching his shoulder, now unable to defend himself. He had been shot. I dodged around rocks and grass until I reached him.

“Here,” I said. He began to protest, telling me to go back and hide. I ignored him. “I don’t know much about first aid, but you need to put pressure on it.”

He let me move his hand away. I laid my hand over his shoulder, wincing as I did. It looked bad. The bullet had hit his shirt, but also grazed his skin. The sight of blood did not help. I pushed down thoughts of distress and focused on helping him. As I began to press down on the wound, my hand suddenly started glowing a faded turquoise. My eyebrows furrowed and I watched in fascination as its light surrounded Prompto’s shoulder, closing the wound. All that was left was blood. We exchanged horrified glances. Suddenly I felt a sharp pain in my left shoulder. I cried out and clawed at it. It hurt so much. My vision clouded for a moment before going back to normal. There was a slight ache, but other than that the pain was now gone.

“What was that?” he choked.

“I have no idea,” I croaked back.

“Prompto! ______! Come on!” Someone called ahead. With an uneasy expression, I hesitantly followed my friends to a cliff overlooking the Crown City. As they watched the city burn and more dreadnoughts fly around, I was locked in thought. How had I healed Prompto? I had never been able to do that before. Did I have magic now? Did the gods do this? What would this mean? I stared at my hands. I had wiped the blood off but I still looked at them like they were filthy. Where had this odd power come from?

I carefully touched my shoulder as the boys pulled up a radio broadcast on one of their phones. It was like a bruise. If I pressed down, it hurt, but other than that, it was fine. I lifted my jacket sleeve and shirt sleeve. Nothing. There was nothing there and yet it still ached.

Prince Noctis and the Oracle Lunafreya were pronounced dead. I looked up with a pained expression.

_Lunafreya? Wasn’t she Noct’s fiance? Oh poor Noctis…_

Prompto dropped his phone.

_I suppose that means I can’t get home, either. If she’s dead… What does that mean for the rest of this world?_

Someone called Noctis. His name was Cor. Interesting name. Noctis was angry but something Cor said sobered him. He ended the call and led us out of there. Prompto and I exchanged more glances, not sure whether to speak of what had happened or not.

“Cor’s waiting for us in Hammerhead,” Noct said. Ignis got to driving. It was another silent ride. I could hear Noctis trying to suppress his feelings next to me. Gladio was silent, not even reading. Prompto didn’t say anything either but looked back at me and Noct every so often. Ignis kept his eyes on the road but did the same as Prompto.

Some time later, Gladio pulled out his phone and let out a very relieved sigh.

“Got a message from my sister,” he announced. “She’s with refugees bound for Lestallum.”

“Well, at least Iris is okay,” Prompto said.

“Yeah. Doesn’t sound like everyone else was so lucky though.”

“We’d best make haste,” Ignis said. “Noct won’t be dead forever.”

I looked at the prince. His gaze was glazed over, facing forward.

“Noctis?” I asked quietly. He didn’t respond. “How are you feeling?”

“No going back,” Prompto declared. “Only way’s forward.”

“‘No going back’,” Noctis repeated. The hurt in his eyes reached my heart. “Let’s go.”

We soon pulled into Hammerhead.


	7. Potestas regis...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noctis takes up his birthright as king.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “The Power of Kings...”

When we got out of the car, Cindy greeted us. She said that Cor had already left to tend to some business. He left us a message with Cid. We hurried to the garage to get out of the rain. Cid was sitting in a corner, looking crestfallen.

“Crystal and the king’s ring,” he said when we were all inside, “what they’ve been after all along.”

“So all talk of peace was merely a pretext,” Ignis said. There was a moment of silence. I hung back to give them space. Oh how I wished there was something I could do.

“They played my father for a fool,” Noctis breathed.

“Don’t kid yourself,” Cid scolded. He picked up a wrench. “Reggie wasn’t born yesterday. Lucis got dealt a losing hand and your old man played it the best he could. He saw this comin’ a mile away, and he wasn’t gonna go down without a fight.”

But it wasn’t enough. Cid was so clearly upset, hunched over at the thought that he couldn’t remember the last time he had seen his friend. The small bouts of silence got to me in the worst of ways. I wanted to cry for them. I watched as Cid left the garage, telling to find Cor. Then I looked back to Noctis. His back was to me, but I could tell this conversation wasn’t helping.

When we got back outside, Cid told us Cor was waiting for us in some tombs. I think we all were wondering why. We piled into the car and headed north for the outpost. It was another quiet drive.

The outpost was a rundown little place. It seemed almost everything was in ruins or at least was falling apart.

_I guess this really is Lord of the Rings._

Noct went around looking for someone. We found her outside a crumbling building. Her name was Monica and she had hair of a grayish color. She knelt and bowed to Noctis, telling him that most of the Crownsguard didn’t make it. Iris was still bound for Lestallum. We were to catch up to the marshal, who I assumed was Cor. Monica gave me a questioning glance, but didn’t comment.

The five of us headed out to the tombs. Were they burying the king? That was all I could guess at that point. It had stopped raining and we made our way up to some old ruins in a rocky outcrop.

“Can’t keep up with this guy,” Gladio said.

“First the Crown City,” said Prompto, “then Hammerhead, then the royal tomb?”

“His nickname should’ve been ‘Cor the Restless’,” Ignis commented.

“Somehow not as catchy as Cor the Immortal,” Gladio said.

“The Immortal?” I asked. Gladio explained he had been through several fatal battles and came out alive. We turned and went through a gate. Where we were looked more like a fort now. A left turn led to a fight with some birds and then to the tomb.

The white stone and dark trimming made for a regal memorial. A carved statue guarded the door, which was black with intricate carvings surrounding it. Noct opened the door and we filed inside.

Cor Leonis was a man who looked much like a lion, albeit without the mane. His resting expression was stern and when he locked eyes with me, I felt like I’d done something wrong. He was quite intimidating.

“At last, Your Highness,” he said, tearing his gaze from mine. I stood to the side, left of Noct.

“Yeah, wanna tell me what I’m here for?” the prince asked. Cor was on the other side of a long dead king’s resting place. The coffin was made of stone and had been cut beautifully to look like a monarch. It held a sword in its hands. Cor held his own over it.

“The power of kings,” he claimed, “passed from the old to the new through the bonding of souls. One such soul lies before you. To claim your forebears’ power is your birthright and duty as king.”

“My duty as king of what?” Noctis muttered. I looked to him in shock.

“Now is not the time to question your calling. A king is sworn to protect his people.”

Noct hissed. “And yet he chose to protect only one prince. Was that his calling? Forsake the masses to spare his own son?”

“How long will you remain the protected?”

I wanted to say he’d done a good job of protecting me, but it was not my place. This wasn’t about me and it certainly wasn’t something I understood enough to argue.

“The king entrusted the role of protector to you.”

“‘Entrusted’ it to me?” Noctis growled. “Then why didn’t he tell _me_ that? Why did he stand there smiling as I left?”

His hand shot out to grip the coffin. His voice was thick. I could feel the lump in his throat, see the tears brimming in his eyes. I understood how he felt.

“Why?”

His frame sunk over his arm, leaning on the coffin. I rushed to his side, placing one hand on his shoulder and the other on his back, making small circles with my thumb. His voice got quieter.

“...Why did he lie to me?”

“I’m sorry, Noctis,” I whispered. My hands were trembling.

“That day,” Cor told him, “he didn’t want you to remember him as the king. In what time you had left, he wanted to be your _father.”_

Noctis was crying now. My own throat was dry, and my chest hurt to see him in such pain. I choked back my few tears. No one said anything for another couple seconds.

“He always had faith in you, that when the time came, you would ascend for the sake of your people.”

The prince, no- _king_ straightened up, standing tall. My hands fell to my sides. I received a grateful expression.

“Guess he left me no choice,” King Noctis Lucis Caelum said, resigned to his fate. He hesitantly held out his hand over the sword in the tomb. It glowed a light blue and hovered over its resting place for a moment. Then it sped forward, launching itself into Noctis’ chest. It circled him and disappeared. At the same time, a faint turquoise light outlined my own body.

“The power of kings goes with you, Your Majesty,” Cor said respectfully. He told the king that there were more tombs for him to find, and that he would tagalong for a little bit to get a measure of his strength. The next tomb was nearby. We began our journey there. “And before I forget, mind telling me who this is?”

I froze, unsure of how to respond. Noctis introduced me and Prompto added in that I fell from the sky. Cor’s scrutinizing gaze had me shrinking behind Ignis.

“We were taking her to see Luna,” Noctis said. “The only lead we have is Angelgard.”

“Angelgard?” the marshal questioned. “The island over by Galdin Quay?”

“I had a dream about it,” I mumbled shyly.

“That is odd. Best keep her with you for now. If she’s connected to the gods, it wouldn’t do to have the empire get their hands on her.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Noct stated firmly. I looked to Prompto, wondering if now would be a good time to let my new ability be known. He glanced back to Noctis and shrugged at me. I decided to wait and see if I could actually do it again.

It wasn’t long until I actually did. A little ways outside the first tomb was an old fort the empire was taking up residence in. My four friends and the marshal seemed happy to put them in their place. I still stayed out of sight, feeling utterly useless once more. Cor kept on an eye on me and Prompto.

Some sort of robot with rockets came at them. I watched in amazement as Noctis warped up to hit one of its weak spots. Gladio and Cor took the legs and Ignis marked places for Noct to hit, Prompto was taking care of some straggling Magitek soldiers.

The machine broke down and fell to its knees. Ignis, Gladio, and Cor got away in time, but as Prompto shot the last swordsman, Noctis got caught up in the blast of an explosion. Checking to make sure no one would attack me, I ran out to join the others.

Noctis came stumbling out from the smoke. We all rushed forward to make sure he was alright. He was shaking it off.

“What?” he coughed. “Something on my face?”

Ignis looked him over for any lasting injuries. “You were burned.”

Noct touched the outside of his right arm and hissed at the pain. It was an ugly red, scalding.

“Eh, I’ve had worse,” the king scoffed. I nudged Prompto. He looked from me to Noctis to me again. “Got any remedies?”

“Not on hand, no,” Ignis said. “Marshal?”

“Can’t say I do,” Cor answered. I took a shaky step forward.

“Ca- Can I see?” I asked nervously. Noct turned himself so the burn was facing towards me. I winced at the sight. I cautiously raised my left hand up near it, not touching the skin. The same turquoise color surrounded my hand. I pressed my hand against the wound.

My right arm immediately started hurting. It was so hot. Was I on fire? I grabbed at it, trying to quell the burning sensation. It calmed only slightly.

“The hell?”

“How’d you do that?”

“Where did that come from?”

“Are you alright?” Ignis asked. I lifted my hand from my elbow. Again it hurt but without the wound. Slowly the pain ebbed away. I nodded weakly.

“Have you always been able to do that?” Noctis asked. I shook my head.

“She healed me from a shot wound,” Prompto vouched.

“That was the first time,” I mumbled.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Noct asked.

“Didn’t seem like the right time. I mean, your home got destroyed, so…”

“Another reason to keep her out of harm’s way,” Cor said. He looked at both Gladio and Noct in turn. “That’s a gods given talent. It needs to be protected. You should teach her to defend herself. If the gods really sent her here, we can’t afford anymore casualties.”

“Right.” Gladio nodded. “Can do.”

Oh sweet Lucis I was so going to die.

 

Cor was still a bit wary of me. I didn’t blame him. I was just some random girl the boys showed up with. My new healing abilities gave the boys new hope, though.

“Wait,” Prompto said as we reached the second tomb. “If Lady Lunafreya really is… gone-”

Noct started to protest, glaring at him.

“Just hear me out! What if ______ is the new Oracle?”

The thought alone scared the hell out of me.

“I don’t think so.” I beat Ignis by a second. “Shouldn’t the Oracle be from this world? And I don’t really think she’s dead. Er, sorry…”

I gave Noct an apologetic look.

“Not to mention the Oracle only heals people with the Starscourge,” Ignis explained further. “I haven’t heard of them healing more physical injuries and certainly not in a way that takes it into oneself.”

Keycatrich Trench did not sit well with anyone. It was a run down shelter as old as the outpost we had come from. Why someone decided to bury a _king_ down there, I didn’t know. Cor left us to our own devices, tossing Noct a key.

Gladio gave me a sort of button to pin to my shirt or jacket. It lit up like a flashlight. How convenient, I thought. We followed Noctis down into the cave. Luckily there was a backup generator.

“Then there was light,” Ignis said once we got it up and running.

“Hello, there, God,” I muttered. No one seemed to hear me.

The cave was dark and dingy and smelled like dirt and dust. I didn’t like it. One room we went into had daemons and I got scratched. It turns out I can’t heal myself. Everything looked the same. The doors, the walls, the walkways, all of it made us go in circles. Some of the doors were locked, so we had to go under and over the cave formations and finally found the entrance to the second royal tomb.

Except it was guarded by a giant spider lady. There wasn’t much of a place to hide. I was frantically running from end to end of the room while dodging her attacks. I wasn’t doing too well as I kept getting grazed. A potion later and I was fine.

The inside of this crypt was the same as the other. The only difference was the weapon in the old king’s hand. A double-sided battle axe flew into the air and into Noct’s chest when he reached out to it. The faint glow surrounded me again. I seemed to be the only one who could see it.

“So Noct borrows the old kings’ powers?” Prompto asked.

“More or less,” Ignis said. “At this rate, he’ll soon rival his father’s legacy.”

 _And what is his father's legacy?_ I wondered.

“The Copycat King,” Gladio teased.

“Out of line,” said king scolded.

“Well? What’s it like?” Prompto pushed.

“Hmm… Like I’ve got some tricks up my sleeve.”

We made our way out of the trench relatively easy. The daemons were backing away for now. They creeped me out. No thank you. Unfortunately, I’d have to face many more on this journey.

Once we emerged into fresh air, Noctis’ phone started ringing. As he spoke to whoever was on the other line, I noticed something to the left of the trench. It looked like more old ruins. My feet carried me over to it. A statue was standing tall and proud in the evening sunlight. I rounded the ridge to get a better look.

Whoever I was looking at was decked out in crazy, pointed armor. Horns protruding from their helm. Between their hands stood a long sword. The almost demonic appearance intimidated me.

“That would be the Founder King.” Ignis’ voice startled me out of my trance. “Apologies.”

“The Founder King?” I repeated. “That’s Somnus?”

“Yes, it is. A truly noble man. Perhaps Noct could learn a thing or two from him.”

”Hmm...”

“Everything alright?”

I sighed, shoulder drooping. “It’s been a long day, for all of us.”

“It certainly has been. I believe there is a caravan at the outpost. We’re meeting Monica there to discuss taking down an imperial base.”

“Let me guess: I should stay there? Until you come back?”

“Actually, I was going to suggest you come along. I understand your new ability causes you harm, but it seems phantom. I hate to ask, but we’re running low on funds to buy curatives…”

He pushed his glasses up. I smiled.

“Okay,” I agreed. With one last look at Somnus, Ignis led me back to the others. Tomorrow was going to be another long one.


	8. ...et auxilium medicarum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Four guys and an alien fight some bad guys and arrive in Lestallum.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “...and the Help of Healers”

It was an easy walk back to the outpost now that the empire’s weaponry had been taken down. Prompto wasn’t sure we could take down a whole stronghold, though. I also had my doubts. There were only four boys and I didn’t know how to fight. Ignis seemed to think I could help, but I wasn’t sure how.

Once we found Monica again, she marked the place on Noctis’ map. The entry they had found was secure. It should be easy to get in. Then she looked to me.

“This is ______,” Noct said for me. “She’s a… healer we found near Hammerhead.”

Well, he wasn’t _wrong._

“It’s good to see you’re making allies, Your Highness,” Monica said. Isn’t he king? Shouldn’t she address him as “majesty”?

Ignis was right in that there was a caravan at the outpost. I didn’t expect “worn down trailer” to be its equal in description, but I wasn’t going to complain. Aloud.

_When will the motel rooms return?_ I wailed in my head. Maybe I’d get a real bed next time.

The next day we hurried to the area on the map. Monica was waiting for us in a little inlet that normally would’ve been overlooked. There was a space to slip through to some other side. She explained that Noctis would join Cor there while she and the other three made a diversion. I was confused as to my place in all this.

“We weren’t expecting a fifth party,” Monica said to me. “So I apologize we weren’t able to include you.”

“That’s okay,” I mumbled, looking down at the ground. “I can’t fight anyway.”

As we made our way to the front of the base, the boys summoned their weapons. I hung back around a corner. They had enough potions to last for this long at least. I worked on consciously summoning the magic I apparently had.

It was difficult. The harder I concentrated solely on the summoning, the harder it was to show up. I tried to feel for it like it was the Force in Star Wars and got a faint light blue tint, but other than that, it seemed I wouldn’t be able to control it just yet. I made a mental note to work on that later.

I waited a few more minutes. The sounds of metal clashing, pained grunts, and gunfire put me on edge. It was _loud._ I was worried something might happen to my friends. Peering around the rocks I was hiding behind, I saw they were clearing out the last few. Once Gladio delivered the killing blow to the final one, Ignis gestured for me to come out. I hurried over.

“Is anyone hurt?” I asked, raising my dominant arm. They looked scuffed up, but otherwise okay.

“Just got bruises that’ll hurt for weeks,” Prompto joked. I didn’t. I approached him quickly. “Woah, woah! I’m okay!”

We rounded up near the gate as it opened. Noct and Cor were standing on the other side. I waved.

“Noct!”

“Alright on your end?” the prince/king asked.

“Right as rain,” Gladio answered, nodding. “The Niffs couldn’t take their eyes off us.”

“Thanks to you we were spared their attention,” Cor said. I again asked if anyone was hurt. “No, but thank you.”

My hand dropped to my side pitifully. Why was I here? They seemed fine on their own. In the air, an ship was gliding towards us. A boy’s voice came over its intercom.

“Stay right where you are,” whoever it was said.

“No thanks, I’m good,” I said aloud. Cor gave me a disapproving glance. I shrunk behind Ignis again.

“Well, well, if it isn’t Cor the Immortal,” the mysterious voice mocked. “So you survived the Citadel. But you won’t survive what I have in store for you. It’s past time for your legend came to an end.”

Whoever this was, he sounded cocky. My friends were going to wipe the floor with him, I bet. The airship’s door opened to a large machine. It was bigger than the one the boys took down by Keycatrich Trench. I stepped back as it leapt down. The ground shook. It was pandemonium as my friends rushed forward to take on this enemy. Monica led me to a safer zone to hide before joining them.

I watched in awe at the teamwork displayed. Noct was calling out short orders in succession. He warped around and caught the blind spots. I hoped he wouldn’t get caught up in the explosion this time. Monica and Cor mostly focused on the MTs that surrounded them. Blow after blow they struck, but there was no end in sight. Those robots really were mass produced.

More and more the quartet got hit. I watched them using potion after potion. Noct groaned in frustration and shouted to Ignis that they were running low _again._ The retainer wasn’t looking too good. Neither was Prompto. They edged the outskirts of the battlefield. I made a split second decision and raced out to them.

I was trodding along the shadows. No one saw me. The others were keeping the enemies busy. I snuck up on Ignis, hand glowing turquoise.

“Please don’t die,” I said as I touched his shoulder. The pain hit me like a boulder. My shoulders ached and I could feel the sting of cuts from MT swords. I grabbed at the sensations, wishing it would go away soon. Ignis pulled me behind him as I recovered.

“You’re supposed to be hiding!” he scolded.

“Say that to your pain,” I groaned. I righted myself and looked for Prompto. He was on the other side of the yard. The ground shook as the machine fell on its knee, vulnerable. “...See ya!”

As Ignis called out for me to stop, I dashed over to Prom. A bullet passed right by my ear. That was a close one. My heart was racing for all the wrong reasons. Breath picking up speed, my hand found Prompto. His eyes widened and mouth hung open. I slipped behind one of the warehouse walls as the feeling of grazed bullets washed over me. My stomach twisted and flipped. I felt like vomiting.

“Thanks!” the bubbly gunman shouted before running to help Noct. I leaned against the wall, legs shaky. Gunfire rang in my ears. The others _sounded_ like they were doing fine now. A minute later and I heard Machine Man cry out in disdain. I stepped out from my spot to see his giant mecha robot collapsed. Noctis was frantically getting away this time. Cor, Ignis, and Gladio were not so lucky. I hobbled my way over to them as the heat from the blast struck. I quickened my pace after seeing the marshal thrust forward and over his feet.

“I should really give you guys a lesson on running from explosives,” I scolded, touching Ignis’ arm. My back erupted with hot pain. I looked to Gladio. He seemed fine and like he did not want to add to my predicament. I pressed a fingertip to Cor’s arm. He had taken the most damage from that. My whole body felt like it had taken impromptu trip to the ground in a freestyle faceplant in the sweltering heat of a volcano.

“Like there’s much we could do,” Gladio retorted back as he helped me stand. My legs were heavy. I felt exhausted.

“You had at least a few seconds to make it a few feet,” I slurred.

“Someone’s feeling talkative today,” Noct teased. My quiet nature wasn’t having their recklessness.

“Say that next time you’re in a pickle and no help will come.”

“Impressive.” Cor addressed Noctis. “Seeing you in action puts my mind at ease. It’s clear I don’t need to worry anymore. I’ll return to watching the Niffs. ‘Til next time. Take care.”

Waving, we said goodbye to Cor and Monica. Noct walked slowly through the gate. We followed close behind. I stumbled to stay on my feet. Healing several people who got beat up pretty badly was taking its toll on me. Guess I’d have to build up a resistance.

“C’mere,” Gladio said, scooping me up after I almost keeled over.

I started squirming again. “Noooo I can waaalk…”

“Stop moving and I’ll think about letting you down.”

I grumpily crossed my arms. This was uncomfortable. What if I fell again?

“Ain’t so bad out here once you get used to it.”

“Still a lot we haven’t seen, though,” said Prompto.

“And a lot for us to do,” Ignis added.

“Yeah.”

“Buck up,” Gladio said. “We’re just getting started.”

I was deposited in the car, head lolling sleepily. It felt like I could sleep for a thousand years. That sounded nice… I was vaguely aware of the others getting in the car. My legs felt heavy. Eyes drooping shut, my head tilted left and I slipped into the realm of sleep.

The dreams that danced in my brain were rather whimsical and weird. I drifted in and out of a deep sleep, sometimes hearing the others speaking. In one dream, there was a large black bird running through a dense forest. It cawed proudly. The leaves from the trees swirled around it, hitting the forest floor only to be swept up again. More birds began to join it. They were all yellow. There were five in total, the black and its yellow friends. As the sequence watched them frolic and play, I smiled, feeling happy. The bird might be different from the others, but it still belonged to their flock.

I awoke to the quartet chatting about the regions beyond wherever we were. My head was leaning on something. Wanting to sleep more, I snuggled closer to my pillow. It wriggled a bit. I sighed contentedly.

“-bigger’s better!” I heard Prompto sing. “More stuff to see and do.”

“First comes Duscae,” said Ignis, “a region known for its wetlands.”

“Really?” my pillow spoke. “Wetlands?”

“I thought _the sky_ didn’t have ground,” I mumbled. Chuckles were heard around me.

“Not the sky,” Ignis explained. “Duscae. With a d.”

“The sky doesn’t have a d. It’s genderless.”

Someone snorted. I slowly opened my eyes, smiling at my stupid sleepy wordplay. Prompto was trying hard not to laugh. Gladio had put his book down. My pillow was shaking. But it wasn’t a pillow.

“Oh, sorry, Noctis,” I yawned, sitting up.

“Uh, it’s fine,” he said awkwardly. “And - y’know, you can call me Noct.”

My eyes widened. “Really?”

“Yeah, I don’t see why not.”

“Does that mean she can call Ignis ‘Iggy’?” Prompto asked.

“Two birds with one stone,” Ignis quipped.

“More like one giant bird with two sneaks,” Gladio said. I laughed.

“Thank you,” I said. “It really means a lot to me, everything you’ve done.”

“No problem,” said the prince. I still wasn’t sure what he was at that point. The other three seconded what he said. I tried my best not to smile and failed miserably.

We kept driving, Ignis telling us more about the lands beyond Leide. There was a chocobo forest. I was quick to tell them about my dream. They smiled when I described the birds. There were five, just like us.

“You have the weirdest dreams,” Noct commented.

Next was Iris and Lestallum. Gladio said his sister should’ve arrived already. I wondered what Lestallum was like. My book didn’t have many pictures of it. I flipped through it to see what it said about the city.

“The Meteor of the Six?”

Noctis’ voice drew me back into the conversation.

“You mean you can actually see it?” I asked excitedly, leaning forward in my seat. “I’ve never seen a real meteor before, certainly not a divine one.”

“Of course,” Ignis answered. “Its heat is harnessed to power Lestallum.”

“Smart.”

“That’s way cool,” Prompto gasped.

“I’m actually looking forward to this,” Gladio said. I found a chapter on Lestallum and began reading. Not long after, we pulled into a gas station. Ignis left the driving to Noct if he so desired. I headed into the convenience store to find a bathroom. When I came out, the boys were waiting by the car.

“Where to next?” I asked, yawning.

“We’re meeting my sister in Lestallum,” Gladio said. “I think you’ll get along great.”

Noct had decided to drive, so I was now sandwiched between Gladio and Ignis. The latter didn’t keep his eyes off Noct and the road. Gladio was reading again. I leaned my head back, looking up at the sky. I was bored of reading. I didn’t feel like thinking more about my predicament since nothing new had come up. I reached into my pocket and pulled my phone and headphones out. Prompto turned in his seat to say something when he spotted them in my hands.

“Hey, Noct, you still got the aux cord in here?” he asked. I looked up, confused. Prom sifted through the contents of the glove compartment until he pulled out a wire. He plugged in one end to an adapter to the car and handed the other end to me. “Show us what kinda music you got back home.”

“I doubt I could show you,” I said, smiling, “but you can listen.”

After inspecting the cord to make sure it could fit in my phone (it could), Coldplay was now singing through speakers. It was nice to share something from home with them. I was scared to sing along, though. So I hummed.

The car ride went by swiftly as carefully selected song after less carefully selected song played. My friends seemed to like the music, and I certainly wasn’t complaining. They looked happy that I was happy. And I was happy that they were happy.

It was late afternoon when we arrived in Lestallum. We passed under a tunnel and emerged into a brightly lit city. As always, it wasn’t what I was expecting. The few buildings we passed by on the way to the parking lot where supported by old columned arches. The buildings themselves weren’t that tall, but they were weathered. It was like several ages worth of history had been melded together to form what we saw now.

As Noct parked the car he said, “It’s getting hot out here.”

“Seconded,” I agreed.

“Just need to pull in somewhere cool,” Gladio said.

“Yeah.”

“Any chance of sleeping in a nice room tonight?” asked Prompto.

“Yes, I’m certain we can find…” Ignis paused. “...suitable accommodations nearby.”

I guessed he didn’t have a good first impression of this place.

We walked up the driveway to the town level. After looking both ways, we crossed the road and found ourselves in what I assumed was the town square. People were roaming about, going who knows where. I then realized this was the first city I had been to in this world.

“Ugh, there are people here,” I grumbled, arms folding.

“Well, yeah, it’s a city,” Gladio said.

“One hell of a crowd,” Prompto observed.

“This must be the main thoroughfare,” Ignis said. Gladio pulled his phone out and told us Iris was at a place called the Leville. I assumed that was a hotel. Finally, an actual bed!

As we walked through alleyways and corridors, it dawned on my that this place looked like if the gas stations we had been to had become a city. It wasn’t awful to look at, but it was a bit dirty. The place was full of wires and pipes. I had no idea where they went. I didn’t want to know.

We came upon a small courtyard with a fountain in the center. It was cute. Right behind the water was the Leville. It was indeed a hotel. We hurried over. As we did so, the ground began shaking. I stopped and struggled to stay on my feet. Noct bent forward, clutching his head. He groaned in pain.

“What’s wrong?” Ignis asked.

“My head just started throbbing,” the prince answered.

“I feel that,” I said, remembering the headaches I gotten from my dream.

“You alright?” Prompto asked.

“Yeah, I’m fine…” Noct said.

“Was that an earthquake?” I wondered.

“It was,” Ignis said. “Most likely from Titan at the site of the Meteor.”

“Wait, your gods are actually on the ground? Where you can see them?”

“Are yours not?” Noct said.

“I wouldn’t say they’re seen everyday,” Ignis explained. “And certainly not everyone can see them, but they are here. There is inevitable proof.”

“Huh. That’s cool, I guess.”

We headed inside the hotel. Noct and I sighed happily as cool air washed us of the heat. I had always preferred cold to heat, even more so now. Soft guitar music was playing, providing me with a sense of safety. There were seats in the middle of the lobby. I sat down as we waited for Iris.

A few minutes went by. Then footsteps could be heard coming down the stairs. I turned my head to see a small girl with dark hair. She actually did look a bit like Gladio. She gasped out a nickname for him and hurried down.

“Look at you guys, holding your own out there,” she said, walking over to us. I stood to be polite.

“What can I say?” Prompto laughed. “You look good.”

They had a short exchange concerning out stay here. Her brother said they had some catching up to do. Noctis introduced me once more. He was more honest this time than he was with Monica.

“From the sky?” Iris asked in disbelief. “I bet Jared will want to hear about that if it’s an old legend.”

I soon found myself in a nice hotel room. It was an upgrade from the motel, and definitely better than camping. It was clear how old the place was from the faded blue wallpaper. Lit sconces were placed at the top of each stone strip that made stripes in the blue. The beds were weathered but looked comfortable with white and green stripes. Leather seats surrounded the coffee table.

“Jared and Talcott!” Gladio said, relieved. “Is it good to see you.”

_Finally some normal names,_ I thought. I was standing behind Noctis, near the wall. Jared was an old man who definitely looked to be the grandfather type. Talcott was a small child who had excitement written across his face.

“Prince Noctis!” he exclaimed, smiling. “Iris is same with me!”

He held his arm to his chest, over his heart. I assumed this was a sign of royal recognition.

“Please excuse my grandson,” Jared said, placing an arm around Talcott. “He has yet to learn his manners.”

Noctis hummed. “I like it.”

“Your Highness is very kind, but we shan’t impose.”

“A very good night to you, Your Highness,” Talcott said. He followed Jared out of the room. Iris closed the door. We all made to sit down. I scrambled for a place that was out of the way and settled on the bed nearest the window. Ignis was on the one beside me. Prompto, Noctis, and Iris sat around the coffee table. Gladio stood. There were a few seconds of silence.

“So Iris,” Noct began, “what was it like inside the Crown City?”

I looked at my feet, trying to give them some form of privacy.

“Not pretty,” Iris said. “The Citadel took a beating. But a lot of outlying neighborhoods made it through in one piece.”

“The empire had tactical targets in mind,” Ignis explained.

“You know if there’s anything else, you can ask me,” I heard Iris say.

“Yeah, uh, thanks,” Noctis said. I smiled slightly at his awkwardness. There was another pause. None of us knew where to start next. Then Iris spoke again.

“About… Lady Lunafreya,” she said slowly. Noct and I perked up at the name. “I keep hearing she was in town. Apparently she left right away, but at least it means she’s okay.”

The prince sighed in relief. “Good to hear. Thanks.”

A third moment of silence reigned. I noticed Gladio’s sister kept glancing at me. I waved slightly.

“So…” Iris repeated my name to make sure it was right. “You… fell from the sky?”

“It was crazy!” Prompto jumped in. “We were having breakfast one morning and this huge sound lit the sky.”

“Then we noticed something tumbling down,” Ignis continued.

“We used the tent to catch her,” Noctis told her.

“All I know is that I was sleeping, had a weird dream with- agh…”

The pain returned. It went away quickly.

“-then I was bouncing on a tent, somehow not injured in any way.”

“That’s so weird,” Iris said, confused.

“Cid told us there was a legend of such a tale concerning the Oracle,” Ignis said.

“So you’re going to see Lady Lunafreya, too?”

I nodded. “It’s taking awhile. But I don’t mind. It’s nice to get to see another world.”

“Well I bet Jared and Talcott will know something about it. We can ask them tomorrow.”

“Thanks.”

“Yeah, well, get a good night’s rest. Do you… want to come to my room? I’m sure traveling with these guys is exhausting.”

I laughed. “A bit, but they’re cool.”

I retrieved my clothes from wherever it was that the boys kept them, and followed Iris to a room nearby. Neither of us said anything. I felt awkward, but sleeping in a rooms without snoring keeping me up kept me going. Once we reached the door, I apologized and said that I wasn’t very good with talking to people.

“Oh, no, that’s okay!” Iris said hurriedly. “Noct’s pretty awkward, too, so I’m used to it.”

“I can probably hold a wet bar of soap better than a conversation,” I joked. We both laughed. There we go. Jokes always work.

This room looked the same as the other one, but the walls were green. When I went to close the door, I could’ve sworn I caught a glimpse of wine colored hair. I peered back out into the hallway. Nothing.

_Huh. Weird._

When I came back inside, Iris wasn’t looking as happy as she was earlier. I realized she must be like the boys and I, who push the bad thoughts away until we’re alone or can’t do that anymore. She sighed. I jumped into Caring For Friends mode.

“Hey, you okay?” I asked gently, walking slowly to her.

“Yeah, I-” She stopped. “No, not really.”

_I don’t know this girl. I don’t know this girl. But she needs help. Comfort. You have to do something._

_But I don’t like hugs! Or touching people in general!_

_Well, it’s a sign of care and comfort so open your damn arms._

I hummed and awkwardly opened my arms. I was sure my expression was contorted with inner confliction. Iris hesitated, but accepted said hug. I have been told I’m very comfortable. My jacket is soft. And I am softer.

“Thank you,” she muttered. If Gladio wasn’t here to help, I’d have to do. I was aware she was probably crying. I understood how she felt. Strange how I lost my home and now my friends lost theirs. We parted after a few minutes. Longer than I would’ve liked, but she needed it.

“We should get ready for bed,” she suggested, wiping her eyes. I nodded with a hopefully calming smile. I was quickest and was in bed within five minutes. The sheets were soft. I snuggled into them. When Iris came out of the bathroom, she tried to start a conversation. I decided to be willing.

“So, did the boys do anything crazy?” she asked. “I swear if they didn’t have Ignis, they’d get nothing done.”

“We- er, they took down an imperial base,” I told her, pushing my sheets down. “I can’t fight, so I just hung back.”

“Just the four of them?!”

“And Cor and Monica.”

“That’s still not a lot of people. They must really be amazing.”

I yawned. “Yeah, they are. Wish I could warp. Don’t know what I’d use it for, but it’d be cool.”

“Yeah, same.” She pulled her bed’s covers down and sat. “Any of them catch your eye?”

My face felt hot. “Huh?”

“C’mon, you’ve been with guys for who knows how many days. You need some girl talk!”

She was starting to remind me of Prompto for some reason.

“Not particularly,” I said. “I’m still getting used to all this…”

“I can’t imagine how it must feel. What happened after you fell?”

I relayed the story. We stayed up another hour or two talking and comparing worlds. Before I knew it, I was asleep. In my dreams, another chocobo joined the flock.


	9. If My Calculations Are Correct, I Have Absolutely No Money

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader and friends spend the day in Lestallum.

Shaking.

Shaking.

………

Pause.

………………………

………………………

_C o l d._

I gasped, opening my eyes and curling up. I blinked. It was like the wind had personally decided it was my alarm clock. Who took the blankets?

“Rise and shine, alien girl!” Iris practically shouted. I groaned at her volume and the light. It was too bright. The window’s curtains were wide open, letting in natural light. I hissed at it. “Come on, don’t you want to see Lestallum?”

“Yeah,” I croaked, “but I don’t mind Le-stallin’ a bit more.”

She giggled. “Noct is still asleep, but Ignis told me to wake you up. Jared and Talcott are leading him and the others on a tour. They didn’t think you’d want to miss it.”

“Yeah, but I just woke up…”

“You’ve got to do that all the time, silly. Now get up!”

I hauled myself into a sitting position. My eyes screamed no, weighing their lids down. “Waking up everyday seems a little excessive.”

“But it’s necessary! Now hurry up and get dressed. They’re serving breakfast downstairs.”

“Alright, I’ll meet you down there. I’m up, I’m up…”

In about ten minutes I was physically ready to start the day. Mentally? I was screaming. Gathering what little strength I possessed, I opened the door and headed out.

Traveling down the hall felt like I was being warped through a tunnel. I swayed slightly, my head spinning with sleepiness. I wondered what time it was, so I checked my phone. As soon as the number met my eyes, I huffed angrily. My eyes narrowed. They were going to pay for this.

 

I slammed my hands on the chair my friends had saved for me.

“You woke me up,” I growled, “at _eight in the morning?”_

The six people in front of me stared for a second.

“It is always best to get an early start,” Ignis said, smirking slightly.

“Then why isn’t Noctis up?”

“I was afraid he’d stab me,” Prompto wavered. I then realized Jared and Talcott were there and slumped over the chair.

“Sorry… I’m not a morning person…”

A round of short laughter chorused around me. I straightened up and took my plate to get some food. I gasped when I saw the biscuits. I snatched some right up before getting some hash browns. I decided that was good for now.

I was mostly quiet at the table, as usual. I listened to their conversation. Gladio had already told Jared and Talcott (who I learned were his house’s retainers) about me, minus the falling from the sky part. He added that part once we were done. They seemed excited, and Jared brought out a notebook he had filled with tales from all around Eos. Cid’s story added up. One of the Oracles a thousand years ago had wed a man with no background. No one knew anything about him except those who had seen him fall. The story had gotten out years after his death from the descendents of his friends. Or at least, that’s what the sources said. Now that it was a millennium later, no one knew whether it was true or not. I couldn’t help but wonder why that man and I had been chosen to just drop out of the sky.

Talcott asked me a lot of questions. His grandfather tried to stop him, but I didn’t mind. His mind was quite creative. I got to relay some of Earth’s history and a lot of mythology, which made me happy. The others added their own questions, and I answered them the best I could. I learned they had Latin here as well. That surprised me. Our worlds were so different yet so similar.

Iris decided to wait for Noctis so she could show him around. I had suspicions that she had a little crush on him. I said nothing. I tagged along with the others as Jared and Talcott guided us to all the landmarks in Lestallum. We went to the power plant first. I'd never seen one before, and it was quite impressive. It was situated over a basin of meteor chunks. Said meteor chunks were big and sparkly. I got a “danger do not touch” feeling from them. I was glad we couldn’t get near them.

Next was the market. It was a wide, open courtyard with lots of tables and stands and _people._ I almost got separated from the group but managed to keep up by looking for Prompto’s bright blonde hair. I had a feeling we’d come back here later. Ignis seemed intrigued by the skewers they had. We wandered for a bit, my three companions telling our tour guides about what we had been up to.

As we reached the outlook, they were talking about the royal arms. I didn’t pay much attention. The view was absolutely spectacular. I could see the meteor from there. It was large enough to make out distinct features, like the white spikes stretching up. It was dark and very much like a big rock had struck the earth. I was glad Titan had caught it: it was possible it could have wiped out all life if it had really hit the ground.

We headed back to the Leville. When we arrived, Talcott told us about a legend of a sword in a waterfall. It sounded a bit like Excalibur and the Lady of the Lake. The small boy and I compared tales, though I couldn’t remember King Arthur’s story all that well. The Sword in the Stone certainly sounded like the royal arms, though.

Noctis and Iris came along soon after that. Talcott told Noct about the sword. The prince thanked him for the tip. The Insomnian quartet and I headed out of the hotel. Ignis advised we stock up on curatives. They couldn’t rely on me to heal them all the time. I didn’t mind helping, but they made the point of it not being fair to me to hold all their physical pain. Not to mention I hadn't built up endurance just yet.

Luckily, enough time had passed by for lunch. We had just enough money for a quick meal. Then we had almost nothing.

“So what do we do?” asked Noctis, who was a prince and had probably never been broke before.

“There’s always hunting,” Ignis said. “Really all we can afford to do at the moment with what little resources we have.”

“Hey, Noct,” Prompto said. “Remember all that stuff we found in the cave?”

“What about it?” Noct said.

“I bet there’s somewhere we can sell it! One of those stands in the market or something.”

“Not a bad plan,” Gladio said. “I picked up some stuff, too. Think I saw somewhere to pawn ‘em, but not sure about what you’ve got.”

The shield was good in the wilderness and knew what kind of things to pick up. We then split up. Ignis would follow Noct and Prom to the market. Gladio was going to wherever he had mentioned. That left me, who wanted to find the nearest bookstore. I walked through the alleyways small streets of Lestallum, not finding what I was looking for. I stopped in an old antique shop that had some old tomes on display. None of them were what I was looking for. The old lady running the shop directed me to a place across town. I headed there immediately.

I gathered every book on Solheim that I could find. Then I almost went on a rampage looking for anything that mentioned famous healers and that one Oracle’s husband. I found a small book on the lineage of Tenebrae. Nothing explicitly on any fallen humans and in what I did find that mentioned him, there was hardly anything concerning the alien part. I was starting to think the people on Eos were just making things up. But surely Jared wouldn’t, right? The others had seemed to believe him. Surely this person must be recorded somewhere.

Noctis and his friends made the horrible, horrible mistake of letting me wander around the city alone. When Gladio came to check on me, he found me trying, and failing, to count up and subtract discount prices for a pile of books I was sitting in. All of them were about Solheim and at least one was about the forming of the kingdom of Lucis.

“Yeah…” he trailed. “I don’t think we can afford those just yet.”

He left. I never got any books. The poor shopkeeper was trying desperately to reshelve the books. I helped, but mostly got in the way. I apologized a lot and left.

I had almost made it back to the market place when I spotted what was quite possibly the best thing in that city: _an old piano._ I gasped and rushed over to it. I pressed one finger to it.

 _We are friends now,_ I thought. All pianos are my friends. One touch is all it takes. I gazed around the small square. Not too many people were out. There was just enough noise for me to be able to play without attracting too much attention. I noticed no sign that I _couldn’t_ test the instrument out. I sat on the worn, sun bleached bench. With my right hand, I acted out a simple C major scale. It sounded to be in good condition. I smiled widely, unable to hold back my excitement.

_But what to play…?_

Best warm up first. And what better way to warm up than with memes? I positioned my hands and began to play short, staccato notes. A jazzy tune soon filled the square. Some people stopped and turned my way. I shoved my anxiety down. I was going to play, so help me _God._

Once that song had ended, I thought a bit more. A few people were straggling behind me now. I may be an anxious mess, but there are a handful of things that override it. One of those things is my love of sharing things with people. I was worried about my performance, but now that I felt that I had a good rhythm going, I decided to jump into it. The next song had been in my head for days. I had played it in the Regalia for my friends. My fingers spread across the keys.

The next song I played was quicker and upbeat. More people were gathering around me now. They enjoyed the fast solo my right hand produced, dancing across the keys and only faltering when I doubted myself. That one ended much sooner than I had hoped. I thought of a longer one, a meme _and_ it reminded of home. I smiled, tapping out familiar chords.

As the song went on, I saw a couple people swaying to the chorus. I couldn’t help but smile. I was making people _happy._ That made _me_ happy. I kept playing, this time opting for a song out of a video game soundtrack. The mature staccato beginning drew more people. I soon had a small crowd around me.

I had to admit, I was pleased with myself. So many hours, so many days had gone into practicing and perfecting these songs. It was endlessly satisfying to play rapid sixteenth notes without any trouble. I loved the feel of it, how my fingers trilled and made the notes lilt. It was as comforting as my usual stims. The forest theme ended on a literal low note.

The next song had also been in my head for days. It was cheery and the lyrics I remembered but did not sing were silly but moving. I kept going eagerly, the joyful notes resonating with my own feelings. The ending was a bit unexpected, but everyone seemed to like it anyway. I then noticed someone had placed a tin can on the piano. When did that get there…?

A little girl asked me if I had any more happy songs. My fingers jumped up and down with more staccato. Luckily, the title of the song fit the weather that day. This one was long, going on further than anyone anticipated. Mr. Blue Sky had no clouds, and for once my thoughts didn’t either.

The left hand hurriedly played the bass clef, right handling its chords. I hit the grace notes carefully. I got a driving rhythm going. The cheerful middle made the children laugh. The recurring leitmotif was simple but pleasing to the ears. I tapped out the final notes.

I began to feel more sentimental. This reminded me of when I’d play for my family during the holidays. They didn’t crowd around me, but they could hear. My grandfather was always encouraging. I swung in some eighth notes, playing a sweet, thoughtful tune. A few people began to drift away as the mellow tune faded, leaving a sad grin upon my lips.

My eyes drifted across the people who were left. My heart jumped as I spotted my friends behind me. I received some nods and thumbs-up. Spirits were lifted again.

“...perfect for a summer’s day,” I heard someone say. A song popped into my head, the movie it hailed from ringing in my brain. It fitted perfectly with my predicament.

“One Summer’s Day,” I announced. Nostalgic chords lit the air. The notes were spirited away, the melody soft and hinting of sweet memories. The eighth notes picked up a bit, calming back down. It was slow, and came to a slow end.

I ended my performance with another nostalgic song. It would have been instantly recognized back on Earth. But here, no one sang along. My smile faded. The tears threatened to well up again. I pushed them back down.

The applause startled me, making me jump. I could hear Prompto cheering behind me. My face flushed, warming even more in that heat. Once the crowd had dissipated, the boys surrounded me in their place.

“That was amazing!” Prom praised. Gladio gave me a hard pat on the back that left me coughing.

“Very impressive,” Ignis said. Noctis nodded in agreement.

“Anything else you can do?” he asked. As I thought, Prom and Gladio looked at the contents of the tin can that had been set on the piano.

“Uhh…” I vocalized dumbly. “I can sing the entirety of ‘It’s the End of the World As We Know It’...?”

They didn’t know what that was.

“I’m a decent writer, I guess.”

“Hey!” Prompto exclaimed. “There’s at least a thousand gil in here!”

“That’s a bit much for one performance…”

“Not bad,” Gladio commented. “Neat talent you got there.”

“At least we’ve got some more money,” Noctis said. I wondered how it felt for him to be broke for the first time in his life.

“Actually, I was thinking we should let ______ keep it,” Ignis told him. “She did earn it herself after all.”

“No, that’s okay!” I blurted, hands waving in a ‘no thanks’ fashion. “I didn’t even put that can there! I just wanted to play.”

“But it’s still yours,” Noct said. “And we got enough from selling stuff. You should keep it.”

The small tin was passed to me. I looked down at the coins inside. They varied in size, some the size of nickels, some were as big as fifty cent coins. I poured them into my hand, reading the different labels and values. It did indeed count up to a thousand gil. There must not be many street performers in Lestallum.

“Well,” I said, “if it’s okay, could I stop and get something before we go?”

We rode off towards the waterfall, a new book in my hand.


	10. How To Get A Hot Body: Set Yourself On Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader begins her training.

“It’s easy. Just imagine the sword in your hand and it’ll be there.”

Noctis was trying to teach me to use his family’s magic, which he could pass on to people if he wanted. It was how the other three didn’t have to physically carry their weapons around. I was skeptical, mostly because magic doesn’t exist on Earth.

It was the day after my piano performance. The boys had spent the rest of it doing one hunt and then looking for a campsite. There were a few more beasts to slay, but since we had the time, Gladio and Noct were fulfilling their promise to Cor in teaching me how to fight.We had gone over basic self defense beforehand. I was already aching. Being afraid of pain certainly did not help.

It wasn’t going well.

“Okay, so…” I stuck a hand out. “Like this?”

An image of a weapon appeared in my mind. The sword Noct was holding appeared in my hand. I wasn’t expecting it to be so heavy. I was dragged toward the ground as it fell with a clank. Hissing, I struggled to lift it again.

“So we’ve got that down,” Gladio said. “But actually using it is going to take a lot more work.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Since you’re the tiniest one here, we’re gonna start with something simple.”

He instructed me to hold my dominant hand, which held the sword, out. I placed my right foot forward, pointing it to the middle of the now empty campsite. With Gladio’s directions, I began to make slow cuts using just my wrist. It surprised me how much effort this actually took. My forearm was not built for this.

“This is… This actually kinda hurts,” I bit. I kept going until I was told to stop. My arm stung with aches.

“Alright,” Gladio said. “Now I’m going to come at you with some easy blows. Do your best to block ‘em.”

My eyes went wide. “But- But what if you hurt me?”

“How many times I gotta tell ya? You’re going to get hurt anyway. Might as well get used to it.”

I let out a small sound that was a mixture between a whine and a whimper. Bracing myself, I waited to be knocked down once more. He swung down. I brought my arm up, supporting my hand with the other one. He came in from the side. I did my best to meet it, but I was a bit slow. He almost hit me.

“Uh, Gladio, dontcha think you should show her the rights cuts first…?” Noctis asked.

“The best way to learn is by doing,” the shield said, trying another side cut. We did a few more rounds of that before he specified just what I was doing. Then he put me against Noctis. “Just those four, nothing fancy, okay, Highness?”

Prompto and Ignis watched from the sidelines as the long stick Noct was using hit me repeatedly. This continued for a very long while. Noctis would give me tips, Gladio would help with positioning. By the time we were ready for another hunt, I was already feeling exhausted.

“Can I just… stay here?” I asked, draping my legs over the edge of the runes.

“Gotta put those skills to the test,” Gladio said.

“Didn’t I just do that?”

I was made to follow as they walked. But then…

“Woah, that’s a cool rock!” I exclaimed, rushing in the direction of some pointed stones with yellow energy crackling from them.

“Wait, don’t touch-” Noctis was cut off by me bending over the rock and going to poke it. Suddenly the yellow stuff was absorbed into my hand. A few strands of my hair stood on end. It was like an electric current had thought I was a good conductor. It soon faded. I stared at my fingers dumbly. “No way…”

“What was that?” I asked, waggling my fingers.

“It would seem…” Ignis said, “that healing is not the only magic you possess.”

“More magic? Then what was that, electricity?”

“Yeah, but,” Noct stuttered, “only- I thought only my family could do that.”

“Everyday you become more of an enigma,” Ignis told me.

“There’s more over there!” Prompto pointed in the opposite direction. “See if that works, too.”

I absorbed the blue energy from the next rock. It was freezing. I shuddered as the effect wore off. The last rock made me feel hot. Red sparks came from it. Ice and fire, then.

“More training for ya,” Gladio said. “Good to know.”

I could feel the different elements coursing through my body if I really paid attention. It was ready to be called at any moment. Noctis told me he could do the same, but had to put his magic into flasks to be able to use it. There had been an accident when he was young that hindered his abilities.

“But you might be able to use it fully,” he said. “Could be useful, having a mage on our team.”

I smiled brightly at the title.

 

“I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU COULD HANDLE THIS!” I exclaimed, heart pounding in my chest. Ignis was not looking good. Prompto wasn’t much better, but at least he was standing. Iggy, though… Bruises painted his skin, gashes from the spiracorn’s horns littering his arms and a few were on his sides. There had been too many of them. I rushed forward, hand glowing teal.

“_______, no,” Ignis protested, coughing. He had ended up taking blow after blow for the others. Several times he had helped Prompto from danger. “A hi-potion will fix the problem.”

Gladio held me back. A few curatives and Ignis was looking much better. I escaped the shield’s grasp and pressed a finger to Prompto, who was accidentally blocked by a tree. The feeling of being hit hy a car caused me to double over. I felt like vomiting. Prom and Noct helped me to stand.

“For goodness’ sake, you can _not_ take it upon yourself to heal us when it can be avoided,” Ignis scolded. My throat felt tight. A few tears escaped. Dammit, why do I keep crying? “There is a reason we keep medicine on hand.”

“I know, but…” My voice was scratchy. “I can’t bear to see any of you in pain.”

They were silent for a second.

“That doesn’t change the fact that it hurts you to help us,” Noctis spoke up. “And you can hardly bear it yourself. Hell, you almost passed out from healing Cor.”

“I just… want to help…” I sobbed. “I can’t _do_ anything else.”

“You are helping!” Prompto was quick to say.

“It’s nice enough to have someone who cares like you do on our side,” Gladio reassured.

“Just… take it easy, okay?” Noct said.

“We know how to take care of ourselves,” Ignis said softly. “You are _not_ a burden to us, whatever you might believe.”

This day had gone from good to bad in what felt like ten seconds. This was the third hunt today. I had already exhausted myself from training and healing some minor wounds from the first two. All I wanted was to help. It had almost been a week and my thoughts were tormenting me with the feeling of annoyance. Like I was holding them back, getting on their nerves, no matter how kind they were.

_Might be better for you to leave, my brain said. Stop hindering them. They know what they’re doing. Why on Earth would they need you? Or you could die-_

_Not. Helping._

“I’m sorry!” I whispered, attempting to stand on my own. I could do it, but only just. The sun was starting to set. I stared at the ground instead of the sky.

“Don’t be,” Noctis ground out. “Why do you have to apologize all the damn time?”

_Because I always view myself as a nuisance and that everything I do is a mistake so I feel the need to apologize due to this crippling fear._

“Anxiety, I guess,” I mumbled.

They let me take a few more minutes before heading back to the campsite. Ignis wouldn’t let me help with dinner. My eyes were glued to the fire as the others talked and bantered. I had my newly beloved blanket around me. It helped keep the panic attacks at bay. I had been doing so well. They let me join in their fighting for a few brief moments. I managed to do better than when fighting Gladio and Noct. Fighting tends to be easier when the other party actually wants to hurt you.

“Hey, you alright?” Noct’s voice cut my thoughts. I nodded slightly, not feeling like speaking. He sat down next to me. “We don’t mean to be so hard on you. We’re just… Uh…”

“Not wanting me to get hurt since I’m not from this world and thus can’t die until we figure out what’s going on?” I finished quietly.

“It’s… more than that, but yeah. I know you wanna help, but there isn’t really much to help with, y’know?”

A pain hit my heart like an arrow. He was right. I _knew_ he was right. But it didn’t help my mental state. If I wasn’t helpful or doing _something_ useful, then wasn’t I just dead weight? Why didn’t they-?

“Why didn’t you leave me at Lestallum then?” I whispered, scared to speak louder in case they heard the extent of my emotions. My throat was tight and dry again.

“That’s not- I didn’t mean that, I just…” He sighed, frustrated. “Dammit, why is this so hard?”

“He means you shouldn’t see us as your responsibility,” Ignis said. “We understand that you’re grateful and that you wish to return the sentiment, but there isn’t any need to do so.”

“Yeah!” Prompto piped up. “That’s what friends do!”

“You really… see me as a friend?” I asked in disbelief. “Even though you hardly know me?”

“Well, yeah,” Noct said. “‘S’hard not to. You’re so… nice. It’s kind of off putting…”

“Too nice for my own good, yeah, I know.”

That managed to get them to laugh. It was true, though. Some might say it’s a good thing, but really, it could easily be taken advantage of. I was lucky these guys had good hearts.

“But really… I don’t think I’ll ever be able to thank you all enough.”

After dinner, Noctis and I headed a bit off the camp ground. He was going to show me how to use the elemental magic I had absorbed earlier. I could still feel it flowing, though it wasn’t uncomfortable. I just had to ignore it.

“Alright, so, the way I make the flasks should be enough to start,” Noct said. “You already feel it inside of you, right? Kinda like a current.”

I nodded.

“Right, so just… try to focus that current into one of your hands.”

“Like I’m using the Force?”

“The what?”

“Nevermind. So…”

I tried tapping into the energy. It was difficult to redirect it, but I managed to shove some into my right hand. It was glowing a faint yellow. But then it faded.

“Uh, you gotta keep the focus,” Noct said.

“Oh. Right.”

I made my hand glow yellow again. It stayed that way this time. Will sheer force of will, it was pushing against the control I had over it. Noct told me to aim and let go. My eyes landed on a bush nearby. Using the hand motion my friend had demonstrated, I let go of the energy and-

_C R A C K_

I whipped around to find I had electrocuted a tree behind me. It was now on fire.

 _I can’t start a forest fire!_ I thought, panicking. _What would Smokey Bear think?_

“Uh… I mean, that’s one way to do it,” Noct said.

“I was aiming for a bush…”

“Alright so, try and control how much you put out.”

I tapped into the ice magic and thrust my hand at the burning tree. A few snowflakes appeared but nothing else happened. My shoulders dropped. I tried again. Nothing but more flurries. I groaned in frustration. Noct came over to demonstrate with an actual flask. We continued practicing until we heard daemons nearby. Then we scurried back up the Oracle Runes. Another hour of silently listening to my friends talk and it was time for bed.

I was the last to head inside the tent. Stargazing was becoming a habit if I couldn’t sleep. Noct stayed with me for a while. We watched the daemons in the distance prowling around. I told him about demons in my own world. He admitted they sounded a heck of a lot scarier than the ones he was used to. Possession and not being able to control oneself didn’t sit right with either of us. I read my new book for a while after he went to bed.

I now had two books. One about Eos’ history in general, the second about Solheim. Their ruins dotted the Lucian landscape, from castles to supposed resting places. They had seen fire as a symbol of life, which caught the attention of Ifrit the Pyreburner. But when they began to spurn the gods, he grew angry and brought down the meteor to kill the very people who had once worshipped him. I thought that was a bit dramatic. Didn’t he know civilizations change over time? That not everything is set in stone? I guessed not.

I only decided to sleep when I couldn’t keep my eyes open anymore. I curled up in the back right corner and drifted off into the realm of dreams.

Gladio woke me up the next morning. I stayed lying down for awhile until I checked the time. It was close to eleven. I shook Noctis awake. If I was up, then he had to be up. He groaned and yawned.

“Alright, alright,” he said. “I’m awake. I’m up.”

We exited the tent together and joined the other two for breakfast. Then Gladio and Noct had me training again with more swords and magic. I managed to light the campfire unnecessarily. It was a start. Then we found the car and drove off to the waterfall Talcott told us about.

It was a short walk from the highway to the waterfall that felt like forever. There was a giant cobra at the bottom of the path that we narrowly avoided and then some big crabs attacked us. I asked them why all their animals were so damn big. No one had a good answer. Finally, we came to the waterfall. Clear blue water roared down a steep cliff into a small river below. The rocky wall was slick and moss was growing under foot. I liked the earthy, wet scent for some reason. It was a pleasant change from the hot humidity outside.

“The legend says to look behind the waterfall,” Prompto said as Noct led us around it.

“And what does the waterfall say?” Ignis asked jokingly.

“I think it says… ‘come in’!”

I laughed.

“Waterfall is the opposite of firefly,” I quipped. Noct halted, turned, and stared at me.

“Don’t,” he said. “Not today.”

“Brown is just a mix of every color.”

“Stop.”

“The brain named itself.”

“Seriously.”

“Tea is just leaf water and coffee is bean water.”

“I am this close to leaving you here.”

“...Fine.”

Luckily, there was an entrance just behind the wall of water. We stepped inside. I thanked the Astrals for sending me here with a jacket. The inside of the cave was frosted. Cool air drifted from further in. The circle flashlight they had given me to clip to my jacket flicked on.

“Double back for our coats?” Prompto suggested.

“What’s the point?” Gladio said. “A little chill won’t kill ya.”

“Unless it’s hypothermia or frostbite,” I added cheerfully.

“Not helping.”

“Well, looking on the bright side,” Prompto said, “maybe the cold keeps the daemons at bay?”

“Yeah, because monsters like warmth,” Gladio retorted.

“Ah. Sarcasm.”

We were greeted with what looked like blue Grimers from Pokemon. I did my best to slash at them, but the space was so small, I was afraid I’d hurt one of the guys. With five of us, they were soon gone.

“Oh, lovely,” I muttered when we came to an icy slide. “I’ve always wanted to ride a fun slide to my death.”

“Can it and go,” Gladio ordered. I sat on the edge and inched my way onto the ice. The ride down wasn’t actually that bad. I flew into Noctis at the end, though.

“Sorry,” I groaned, hauling myself to my feet. We were now in an ice hell of a cave. “Guess hell really did freeze over.”

My friends laughed. Noct began to lead us through various halls and rooms. Several times we got lost. Lots of daemons came to say hello and we were having none of it. I healed a few cuts, and shot some sparks at blue Grimers that did nothing but provoke them. When we came to a ledge to cross, I was ready to nope the heck out.

“Yeah, I think I’ll stay here,” I said.

“Not a chance,” Gladio said. “We’ll keep you in the middle. If you fall, Noct will catch ya.”

I had never been so afraid in my life as I slowly scooted across the frosted ledge. I almost lost my footing at one point. Gladio kept me up and Ignis helped me down when we reached the other side.

“I really hope we don’t have to do that again,” I breathed. My heart was racing. They let me (and Prompto) calm down before moving on. Speaking of Prompto, we stuck close together. He was frightened of what could be in the cave and I was nervous and on edge. We did our best to calm each other.

I think we all sighed in relief when the end of the cavern was in sight. A royal tomb did indeed lie there. We just had to traverse one small room before getting to it.

We were promptly attacked by what looked like mini Cthulhus. More blue Grimers and these sparky balls of living ice joined them and it was utter chaos. I was slashing left and right, trying to remember the tips my friends had given me. I watched the others for signs of distress. I wouldn't let them get hurt, not on my watch. Unfortunately, one of the Cthulhus was targeting me specifically. I tried to run around him. He blocked my way and began to corner. I swung at the tentacles trying to harm me. My energy was draining. Was he sapping my lifeforce? Oh, _hell_ no. Not today, Satan.

My mind was in a frenzy with the will to live and the Gen Z wish of death combatting endlessly. My vision was hazy, the floor starting to sway beneath me. I took my sword in both hands and raised it up to challenge the Elder God before me.

“Don’t fuck with me!” I shouted. “I have the power of God _and_ anime on my side!”

“What-” someone started. I interrupted them with a loud screech and charged the mindflayer. I managed to get him back a few steps and quickly darted to the left so I was free once more.

“That’s what I’m talkin’ about!” Gladio praised. Prompto hit the monster with a few well aimed shots. Ignis marked a spot that Noct came to hit. They let me land the final blow. All the daemons were gone.

“The hell did you shout at it?” Noct asked.

“A Vine,” I said proudly. “A meme. And I have no regrets.”

Noctis unlocked the royal tomb. He retrieved its corresponding weapon and the other two he already had appeared with it. We all observed the three royal arms circle Noctis and disappear. Gladio patted him on the back. I asked how it felt.

“Kinda weird,” the prince answered. “Like the actual magic is manifesting itself.”

The way out of the cave was much easier. No crossing ledges, no daemons, no steep natural ramps to walk up. Finally the end was in sight. Our eyes were met with the setting sun. It felt nice to be out in fresh air again, though I’d miss the cold. Noctis suddenly cried out in pain and clutched at his head.

“Noct, you okay?” Prompto and I were quick to rush to his side.

“What did I…” he groaned. “Where was that?”

“What is it?” Gladio asked.

“A hole in the ground… something burning… the Meteor?”

“You saw the Disc of Cauthess?” Ignis gasped. They decided to get back to Lestallum. The only problem we had was stopping along the way to find somewhere to sleep. Another campsite. Joy.


	11. Apotelesma

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The quintet begins their journey to see Titan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: the influence that stars have over human destiny

“Prince Noctis!” Talcott exclaimed when he saw us. “Welcome back.”

“Your story came to a happy end,” Ignis told him.

“No ladies in lakes, though,” I said. As we entered the hotel, Noctis received another throbbing headache. “Noct?”

“What’s the matter?” Iris asked, concerned. “You alright?”

“He’ll be fine, don’t worry,” Gladio said, waving her away. “But we oughta take a closer look at this so-called Disc.”

I bounced in excitement at the thought of seeing the Meteor in person. An actual _meteor. From space._ And it was such an important part of their history, too! Ignis smiled at my enthusiasm.

“Then look no further than the outlook,” Prompto said. “We can use the viewer things!”

“No substitute for being on sight, but it would be a start,” Iggy reasoned. “Let’s see what we can glean of Noct’s condition.”

“Then what are we waiting for?” I prompted, clutching my history book. “There’s no time like the present!”

It felt nice to be myself again. I had finally started getting used to my new friends and judging their reactions. For once, it was me leading them. They asked me what I had learned about the Disc. I told them it’s where Titan caught the Meteor and that the size of it probably would’ve wiped all life had it met its destination. Like the dinosaurs. That scared them a bit, but my excitement washed it away as we neared the outlook.

“There!” I called out, spotting the viewer things. “You can even see it from here!”

Prompto and I made to rush to get a good view, and him some good pictures, but I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw the person who was already there. My heart leapt into my throat.

“What a coincidence!” said the man from Galdin Quay. He had _followed_ us here. Maybe. I am always on a quest to give people the benefit of the doubt.

“I’m not so sure it is,” Gladio growled, suspicious. I gave him a glance. His guard was up, a stern expression on his face. Odd Man began to walk towards us. My own guard went up, just in case.

“Aren’t nursery rhymes curious things?”

His question caught us all off guard. When no one answered, I spoke up. “Uh, I guess…?”

He granted me a glance. For a second, he seemed puzzled. That seemed to be a recurring theme of my presence among my new friends. No one knew who I was. Not that I was complaining…

“Like this one.” He recited a rhyme about the Archaean, who I guessed was Titan. As he did so, he continued his way, causing us to split our group down the middle. Ignis came forward to push me between himself and Noctis. “The King made to kneel, in pain, he crawls.”

“So how do we keep him on his feet?” Prompto asked. Odd Man reached the edge of the outlook.

“You need only heed the call. Visit the Archaean, and hear his plea.”

He dramatically turned around.

“I can take you.”

 _Oh, yes, please!_ I thought, eager to see the Meteor and maybe an actual _god._ I turned to my friends for approval. They didn’t look convinced as they made a small half circle to go over our options. I listened as they decided to go along with it, but keep caution close. As they spoke, I looked to the strange man again. He observed me closely. His gaze trailed all over me, trying to understand just who I was to these young men. My face instantly felt uncomfortably warm.

“...let’s do it,” they concluded. I brought my attention back to my friends. I guessed they had decided to go along with this guy for now.

“I’m not one to stand on ceremony, but such an occasion calls for an introduction,” our guide said. “Please, call me Ardyn.”

It sounded familiar. Had I heard it somewhere before? It was like the word ‘ardent’, so I figured that must be it. I followed Noctis closely as Ardyn led us up the stairs. I felt safest by him for some reason.

“Come with me to the car park. That’s where I left my automobile. She’s a dear old thing. Pales next to your Regalia, but she’s never let me down.”

_Wait, how does he know what car we have?_

“So, we take two vehicles - a convoy of sorts. Shall we?”

As strange and eccentric as this man was, I enjoyed the way he spoke. Eloquence has always been a weakness of mine. He was no exception.

A minute passed in silence before Ardyn spoke again.

“If I may ask,” he addressed me. I startled a bit, not expecting to be singled out while with my friends. “What brings a fair young lady such as yourself to travel with four young men?”

“Oh, um,” I stuttered. “That’s, uh…”

“What’s it matter to you?” Noctis shot back. I sent him a grateful smile.

I could practically feel the tension from the boys. It radiated off them like a nuclear generator. They clearly did not like and/or trust this man. I couldn’t help but give him a chance. But that doesn’t mean I’d tell him everything.

“Just curious,” Ardyn said. “Nothing more. No need to be so _hostile.”_

Ardyn’s car was red with a white stripe running down the middle. Like the Regalia, it was also a convertible. I guessed people just really like those in this world. Noct pulled me behind him

“All set?” Ardyn asked. “Allow me to do the honor of assigning your driver…”

_What? Why?_

What was the point of picking someone to drive?

He chose Noct. Predictable. Yep, he knew who my friends were. Greaaat.

“What if I drive your car?” Noctis shot back, crossing his arms. I erupted into a fit of giggles. I tried to calm myself, but the image and the thought and the sheer nerve were just too amusing. “You okay?”

“I’m fine,” I gasped, catching my breath. “Noct, you can’t drive someone else’s car.”

“I can do whatever the hell I want.”

“The government says no.”

“Fuck the government.”

“Highness/Noctis, you _are_ the government.” Ignis and I spoke simultaneously. Ardyn chuckled a bit.

“You might find the rental fees to be more than you bargained for.”

“Burn,” I whispered. I was lightly elbowed. “Ow.”

“You drive your car, and I drive mine. With that decided, let us be off.”

“Alright, fine,” Noct agreed. He turned to find the Regalia.

“Oh, and one more thing.”

“Agh, what is it now?”

Ardyn’s eyes searched for mine. Being me, I deigned to avoid such an uncomfortable feeling.

“I’m sure riding with four boys gets cramped,” he began. “If it’s alright with her, I wouldn’t mind giving the lady a lift.”

“No way in hell,” Noctis growled.

“Come now, why not let her decide for herself?”

Everyone’s attentions rested on me. I shrunk back, an uncomfortable awkwardness in my shoulders.

“Uh, um,” I stuttered. “I’d, uh, um… I’d rather stay with you guys…”

Gladio nodded in approval.

“Very well,” Ardyn said. “Just follow me and we’ll be off.”

 

The ride that followed was mostly silent. I could feel the tension from the guys around me. It set my nerves off, anxiety rising. Ignis had taken Noctis’ place in the back. I now sat between the biggest two of my friends. As much as I liked them, I still wasn’t fond of touching people. I was hunched in on myself, shoulders forward and legs pressed together.

There were a few conversations here and there. They discussed whoever this Ardyn guy was - he almost seemed familiar to me, in an odd way - saying that they couldn’t imagine him as either a Niff _or_ a Lucian. Which begged the question: just who was he?

_Doesn’t matter. Yet. He’s helping us now._

_But he might not later._

_So?_

_This is why you get attached so easily._

About halfway through the drive, Noctis started rubbing the back of his neck subconsciously. At the same time, my wrists began twisting, the bones cracking and popping. It was comforting to me, though Ignis did send me a questioning glance when I didn’t let up after a half a minute.

“Noct, if you keep doing that, you’re gonna hurt yourself,” Gladio warned. He looked at me. “You too.”

I dropped my hands to my lap, eye twitching.

_I’m stimming, you ignorant- no, calm down. He doesn’t know._

_But what was Noctis doing?_

_Heh, maybe he was stimming too._

_But only autistic people do that. And Noct’s not autistic._

_...Or is he?_

I thought on it for a minute. He was “picky,” like me. Or rather, aversive to certain foods. Both of us weren’t fond of the sweltering heat (personally I preferred the cold). But other than that…

_Fishing is his special interest._

_Oh my God._

My eyebrows furrowed the more I thought about it. He had trouble expressing his emotions in neurotypical ways. The process of processing what had gone on in Insomnia had him overwhelmed, more so than his friends. Granted, it did mean he was the king now and thus has a lot more responsibility, but still. He almost hadn’t been able to take it without… melting down…

_There’s no way._

_Oh, there IS a way! No wonder we get along so well!!_

A tugging began in my chest. I looked down and then back up. Whatever invisible string had manifested now pulled me toward Noctis. I watched as his head jerked for a moment. Our eyes met in the rearview mirror. He started rubbing his neck again.

“Noct, how many times I gotta tell ya?” Gladio said.

“He’s stimming,” I said without thinking. My wrists began their twisting in earnest.

“He’s what?” Prompto asked.

“Stimming - any repetitive physical stimulation that calms someone. It’s a symptom of autism.”

“Yeah, but… Noct’s not autistic.”

“Are you sure?”

Complete silence. The only sound was the hum of the Regalia’s engine. Noctis tried his best to keep his eyes on the road. Ignis was thinking it over as well. Gladio didn’t seem to believe it. Prompto was frantically looking up information on his phone.

“Wouldn’t I have been diagnosed sooner?” Noctis finally said. I shrugged.

“I wasn’t until two years ago,” I explained. “Trust me, it explains everything. Especially your odd interest in fishing.”

“It’s certainly not a bad speculation,” Ignis put in. “It actually makes more sense the more I think about it. Granted, my knowledge on the subject is rather limited…”

“Food aversion, possible sensory issues,” I listed. “And the special interests are there if you look. He’s probably an aspie, like me. ‘Mild,’ to you. But keep in mind it’s a spectrum, which is why it’s included in the first place. Mild doesn’t exist. You’re either autistic or you’re not.”

“Oh hey!” Prompto cut in. “Listen to this: ‘vulnerable to becoming emotionally overwhelmed under stress or when faced with change, may appear to lack empathy for others or lack emotional reci- recipro- recripo…’”

“Reciprocity,” Ignis and Noctis said simultaneously.

“Yeah that! ‘May have difficulty communicating feelings in a way that is clear to others, stress or emotional distress often results in behavioral symptoms like increased perseveration or rigidity.’”

“Noct checks all the boxes on that,” Gladio said, now more convinced.

“What’re you reading?” Noct asked, trying to get a glimpse.

“Watch the road, Noct,” Ignis instructed.

“‘Emotional Features of Asperger’s Syndrome’,” Prompto cited. “I found a whole board for it online.”

“Would you mind reading more?” Ignis said, now using his own phone for research. “This has more merit the further down the hole we go.”

“Wait, so you’re saying I have a mental disability?” Noct protested. “No way.”

“Think of it as a gift,” I said. “You’re completely different from everyone else on the planet. Our minds are literally wired differently from anyone else’s.”

“But- Hold on…”

“‘People with Asperger’s Syndrome are generally more compassionate,’” Ignis joined the quoting session. “‘Studies have found that when people are overwhelmed by empathetic feelings, they tend to pull back.’ Noct, that is _definitely_ something you tend to do.”

“Uh, guys?” I said. Noctis’ hands were tightly gripping the wheel now.

“So _that’s_ why you avoid eye contact,” Prompto said. “Does it really make you guys that uncomfortable?”

“Yes, but… Guys, you’re making him nervous.”

Our leader let out a breath as they quieted down.

“You okay, Noct?”

“Yeah, I…” He paused. “Well… Not really, I mean…”

“Need some time to process it?”

“Yeah…”

“Can do. Now hush, you three. Give him some space.”

Right as I said that, Ardyn’s car pulled into a rest stop. I was glad for the distraction. If we stopped, maybe I could help Noct figure this out and reassure him it would be one of the best discoveries of his life.

What say we call it a day here?” he asked the boys.

“‘What say’ we continue on to Cauthess?” Gladio suggested impatiently.

“The Archaean’s not going anywhere!”

I giggled a bit and Ardyn looked proud of himself. Everyone exited their respective rides.

“Neither are we under your stewardship,” Ignis proclaimed. I laughed more. Savage, Iggy.

“So we make camp,” Prompto said somewhat bitterly, _“with Ardyn.”_

“Hell no,” Noctis protested.

 _Camp again?_ I whined internally. I sent Gladio a pleading look which he never received.

“Might as well get the tent up,” he sighed.

“Oh, I’m afraid I’ve never really been one for the outdoors,” Ardyn said slowly. Thank God he was here or I would have restless sleep for the second night in a row. “I shall foot the bill, so let us stay at the caravan over yonder.”

Well, at least it wasn’t camping.

“Hey, Noct,” I said, hurrying over to him. “Do you… need some space or… I can help you process it if you want. But you don’t have to. It’s up to you.”

He shifted his weight from side to side for a moment.

“Can you stay quiet?” he finally asked. I nodded. “Hey, Ignis, ______ and I are going for a walk. We’ll be back later.”

“Of course,” Iggy said. “Be careful. There’s no telling what’s out there.”

The small patch of woods made for good strolling space. I followed Noct awhile, admiring the trees and foliage. My mouth stayed shut, only opening occasionally to compliment particularly nice plants. When maybe thirty minutes had passed, we found a fallen log to sit on. I waited patiently to see if Noctis would say anything.

“So…” he started awkwardly. I moved my head to face towards him but didn’t look directly at him. “Can I ask… what it was like when you found out?”

“That I’m autistic?”

“Yeah.”

“Hmm… It was like everything about my life suddenly made sense. That there wasn’t anything wrong with me. That I wasn’t the only one who’s like this. It’s very reassuring in my not-so-great moments of self doubt and despair.”

“Right…”

I let him think.

“But… Is it normal for me to feel… overwhelmed by it?”

“I would think so, yes. It’s a big change, a big revelation. Take your time to process it. We won’t rush you. And if you don’t think you are, that’s fine, too.”

“That’s the thing, though. I think… I mean, everything they were reading is right. And I can’t think of any reason why I couldn’t be… It just feels… not wrong exactly, but…”

“Hard to come to terms with?”

“Yeah…”

He rubbed at his neck before realizing what he was doing and stopping.

“I’ll warn you now,” I said. “If you do decide that you are autistic, like me, your symptoms might get stronger. In fact, I think they already are… Stimming’s perfectly normal. I have my own little stories on that subject.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yep. I do this weird thing with paper - it’s all over those history books now - where I take the edge and sort of… fringe it. Like, if I bend it with one finger, a crease forms and then I push down. It kinda ripples down to the edge. The sensation is super calming. The only problem is that I do it to any paper-like surface I can find. My mom got on my case about it all the time, telling me I couldn’t turn in schoolwork like that. One of my friends tried to help me to break the habit by stopping me whenever I did it. I never did stop.”

“Huh… So it can be anything?”

“Yep. And then there’s the whole food issue.”

We both groaned.

“People always liked to tease me or complain about how there wasn’t much I would eat. Heck, they still do. Once learned I have Asperger’s Syndrome, I started eating so much mac and cheese. My mom would stock up on it every week.”

“No wonder it’s been so hard for Ignis to get me to eat specific stuff.”

“Yeah… Trying new things has always been hard for me. I’ll try weird stuff, but I still refuse to eat hamburgers.”

“Really? But they’re so good!”

“Maybe to you, but not to me!”

We laughed. He slowly started to relax into the idea that hey, maybe he’s even more special than previously thought. This, however, wasn’t due to his birthright or some divine prophecy. It was purely him, and he was alright with that.

When we came back, Gladio was eyeing Ardyn like a hawk. If the guy made one wrong move, it’d be over for him, I knew that much. We he saw us approaching, he called Prompto over. Noctis seemed relieved that they didn’t bring up his new revelation. He still needed time to mull it over.

Gladio suggested I train some more. My shoulders drooped. My arms were sore from what I had already been doing. Was relaxing not in this guy’s vocabulary?

“Didn’t we do that this morning?” I complained.

“You need all the practice you can get. I’m not taking any chances of letting a daemon get you when we aren’t looking.”

“And what a welcome death it would be,” I muttered, dragging my feet over to him. He took me and Prompto out to an area just outside the station. I summoned the sword they had gifted me with. Gladio gave Prompto one. “Wait, why are you here?”

“He’s not as experienced as the rest of us,” Gladio told me. “So I figured it’d be good to let you two duke it out.”

I sighed in frustration.

“Don’t worry, I’ll go easy on ya!” Prom said cheerfully. My eye twitched. Best get this over with.

“Please just end it for me now,” I called out. He lunged and I jerked in fear before remembering what to do. I barely managed to block. I cut from the left. He jumped back and tried another blow. I blocked again and swiped at him with the sword. This continued for several minutes until my footing said no and I stumbled.

“Ha!” Prompto won that round.

“How many times do I have to say: it’s left, then right,” Gladio instructed.

“Sorry, I kinda forget when someone’s _attacking me,”_ I retorted. I heard some people laugh behind us and turned to see everyone from our little group watching. Including Ardyn.

_Oh no, I’m making a fool of myself in front of a stranger._

“Again,” Gladio barked. I managed to keep my balance this time. “Prompto, watch your speed. If you’re too fast and focused on hitting, you won’t see what’s coming at you.”

I struck at my blonde friend with the practiced movements I had been taught. I quickly learned I was good at dodging and tried to use that to my advantage. I lunged. He parried. He slashed. I stepped away in a split second, the blade grazing my arm. I twisted myself around to counterattack.

“Watch yourself, ______! If you keep that angle, you’ll damage your nervous system.”

“I don’t have a nervous system!” I shouted, now frantically blocking. “I _am_ a nervous system!”

 _I’m here all night, folks,_ I thought as they laughed again.

My legs felt heavy by the time we were done. Both Prompto and I were panting as we trudged back to the caravan to sit down. I took my glasses off and let my forehead hit the table with a thud. My eyelids refused to open. I could sleep for a year. Or ten thousand. Give or take.

Footsteps trailed around me. Someone set something on the table. I lifted my head to see a water bottle and an Ignis. Prompto was already gulping his down. I did the same, but more slowly. Hopefully Gladio would let us rest for the remained of the day.

When the sun began to set, Ignis went inside to cook dinner. Again, he wouldn’t let me help. Not just yet, anyway. I had a feeling he wanted to keep me away from knives for the time being. I didn’t blame him after the last accident I had. So instead I spent my time observing for the handsome stranger in the odd clothes. The weird vibes I got from were equal parts intriguing and creepy. Sometimes he locked eyes with me for a few seconds. I always looked away first. He didn’t say much until night had almost fallen, just watched us watching him. As he spoke to the others of his travels, I went to check on Ignis.

“Everything okay in here?” I poked my head in the doorway. Iggy nodded.

“Everything is in order,” he said. “Though if you’re willing to help now, I wouldn’t mind.”

This time I watched the noodles spin around the pot while he did the vegetable cutting. However, his mind was lost elsewhere, his brows furrowed seriously. His chops weren’t even and I bit at my nails, worried. Was it Ardyn that had him on edge? I couldn’t imagine any other reason why he might be other than Noct’s headaches and self-diagnosis.

“Hey, Ignis?” I voiced. He turned his head toward me. “You okay?”

“Yes, I- Ah!” He hissed and I peered down to see he had cut his hand. A recurring event, it would seem. Though this one was worse than the one I had. “Blast…”

My right hand came up, glowing teal. “Here, lemme see.”

“_______, no, I can’t let you-”

“It’s just a cut. It’ll hardly do anything to me. Now come here.”

Ardyn chose that exact moment to step into the van. He watched curiously as I took Ignis’ hand and tapped into the white magic I possessed. I gasped as the sharp pain pierced my hand. It ebbed away slowly and soon everything went back to normal. Ignis was wiping the blood off his hand. I looked up to see Ardyn standing there, an unreadable expression written across his face that masked a bubbling fury. He was staring at me, no, at my _hand,_ which gave him a wave.

“Uh, I guess the secret’s out,” I said. Ignis jerked his head to face our visitor. “So ah… Yeah…”

A pregnant pause filled with tension. Ardyn stormed out of the van, going who knows where. All I had seen in his eyes was a madness filled with anger. What was wrong? Did he… not like my ability?

“Of course he came in at that exact moment,” Ignis muttered behind me. I turned back to him.

“I don’t think he meant to. Did you see how angry he was?”

“Angry? Livid would be more precise.”

“...Should I go see if he’s alright?”

“No, let him be. The less we interact with him, the better. And thank you.”

“No problem.”

By the time he came back, Ignis and I had finished making dinner. Most of us were sitting at the table. I picked at my food, both hungry and not. I perked up when Ardyn came into my field of vision. Whatever had caused him to storm out earlier had worried me.

“Hey, you okay?” I asked him.

“I’m just fine, my dear,” he reassured. “Though you all did neglect to tell me of your… gift.”

Noctis and Gladio fumed.

“How do you know about that?” the latter interrogated.

“Wasn’t aware we _had_ to tell you,” Noct shot back.

“Iggy cut himself,” I said quickly.

“And you just _had_ to heal him?”

“It’s more efficient than using a potion! Which you need for other things, I might add.”

Noctis sighed. “Just don’t overexert yourself, okay? We don’t need you passing out again.”

“That was one time!”

Ardyn stared at me as we bickered. I did a double take when I saw his unreadable gaze fixed on me.

“That is no ordinary gift,” he stated lowly to me. “Healers like you should be revered for the services they provide. And should you find yourself underappreciated or cast aside, just remember it is not your fault but of those who scorn you.”

He turned on his heel to fix his own plate. Our gazes were glued to where he had been standing. A moment passed.

“The hell was that about?” Noct voiced. I shrugged.

“Personally I’m thankful to have such a gifted individual on our side,” Ignis said. I blushed and shrunk into myself.

“Guys…” I trailed, not liking all the attention I was getting.

“Well, it’s true,” Gladio said. “Who’s gonna save us from all the explosions?”

“That’s your own damn fault for not running away when you had the chance!”

“But how would we _know?”_ Prompto teased. “All they do is sit for a moment and then BAM! We’re all a burning mess and you’re sprinting over to help.”

Our guide stepped back out to join us.

“Maybe if you thought of your own safety instead of the victory you had, you’d be better off,” I commented.

“Yeah but every time we tell you we’re okay you heal us anyway,” Noct said. “Don’t stress yourself.”

“We’ve had this conversation before, yes, I get it, I’ll be more careful from now on and no, I don’t think of myself as too much of a hinderance anymore. Now eat your food; it’s getting cold.”

There were a few laughs at my aggravation. I really wished they’d take better care of themselves, though.

The rest of the evening was spent awkwardly listening to tales Ardyn told us. Noctis and his entourage showed clear signs of annoyance. I rested my head on one hand and tried to ignore their ever rising agitation. At one point, Ardyn swiftly spun around and attempted to lightly caress Prompto, who sat back and gave him a disgusted glare. I silently laughed, shoulders shaking. My friends’ reactions were too funny.

When it came to sleeping in caravans, I opted to take one of the two couches which lined the sides. The quartet doubled in the beds, and I wasn’t about that. However, that left Ardyn sleeping across from me. I had lost my blanket. Gladio or Prompto had it, or at least that was my best guess. So I curled up into my jacket and failed at falling asleep for the umpteenth time.

I flipped to my other side, facing the back cushion. No one was snoring yet. Perfect moment to fall asleep. Fourteen minutes later and consciousness would not leave me. I exhaled loudly, irritated. My usual strategy of daydreaming yielded no results. Anxiety had decided that now was its time to fucking shine. My heart wouldn’t settle and metaphorical butterflies used my stomach as a tourist location. I turned back over.

I was a bit nervous after Ardyn’s odd reactions to my magic abilities. Why did he act that way? Why did he look so _pissed_ at what he saw? Was healing not a good thing? The guys seemed to think it was.

_It’s just one person. Don’t worry about it. You’re probably fine._

I sat up, realizing dreams would come late. I checked the beds. Noct and Iggy were sound asleep. Prom and Glad shifted a bit, but were otherwise fine. Ardyn hadn’t moved. I slowly stood up. Like a deer in a meadow, I crept out of the van. A breath I didn’t know I was holding slowly eased out. The stars looked nice tonight. It was about fifty feet to get under the dim streetlight. I crossed my arms. My jacket was back inside.

_Why do I feel so emotional today? Is it Ardyn? Is it the Meteor? Am I just sensitive?_

The emotions I had been so adamantly evading piled up. The toll, however, was unavoidable. Staring at the stars had been helpful until now. No matter where in the universe anyone could be, there would always be a gorgeous cosmic view. There would be patterns to trace and planets and stars and whole galaxies are merely dots of bright light we can’t distinguish. But… I longed for something I recognized. A familiar constellation. The sight of Venus in the sky before any star. I wanted Jupiter and Uranus and Mars. The sun to shine brightly but not too bright. To gently warm the Earth in spring and cool in the fall. I wanted the thought of asteroids and shooting stars and the history of the moon and its craters you could see with a telescope. I wanted a blanket to spread on the grass and my mother to come out and look at the night sky with me even though we should be sleeping.

I wanted home. And it hurt. It hurt so much I thought I couldn’t take it. A dry lump caught in my throat yet again. My chest felt tight, eyes brimming with tears. A cold breeze blew by and my body shivered. I tried desperately to blink my thoughts away. But I couldn’t. Not when I hadn’t faced my own fears. The fears of never seeing home again. Never seeing my parents or my best friends. The sight of my cat in the morning. The wide backyard stretching to a small forest with a trail to walk through. The sparkling lake. My warm bed. Long nights spent reading or watching videos at late hours. Skype calls with my friends.

It was so cold here.

So cold.

And hollow.

I felt… hollow…

 

“What’re you doing out here?”

“Ah-!” I gasped. I spun around to see Noctis standing behind me, sleepily rubbing his eyes. A relieved sigh left me. “Oh it’s just you.”

“Who else? What’re you doing?”

“I… I was, um…” The hoarse voice coming from me sent my mind grasping at thoughts for an answer. “Stargazing, I guess…”

I sniffed. Dammit. The last thing I needed was for him to see me crying. I didn’t dare look his way, fearing judgment. He stepped forward.

“Are, uh, are you… okay?” he asked. I nodded, a sure lie.

“I just…” No words volunteered to leave my mouth. I looked up at the sky, a heartbreaking smile painting my lips. I sighed. “The sky is nice.”

The crack in my voice caused him to grimace slightly.

“I just wish I could see something familiar.”

He stepped forward.

“And I keep thinking that maybe if I look hard enough…” I swallowed. “...I’ll see home.”

The dam broke. I let out a sob, hand coming up to wipe the tears away. A hand fell on my shoulder. I couldn’t- I couldn’t take it. I missed home. I missed it so much. My heart ached so much I couldn’t take it. The deep breaths I took to calm down didn’t help. The small cries left my throat softly. A soft sigh left Noct. A moment passed.

………

Awkward arms pulled me forward. I responded to the hug almost immediately, searching for any sort of comfort. Failing to calm down, I cried into his shoulder. One of his hands rubbed gently at my back, doing his awkward best to help.

“Don’t worry,” he whispered determinedly. “No matter what, no matter how long it takes or how hard it’ll be…

“I’ll help you get back home. I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to longlostintentions for pointing out to me Autistic Noctis!  
> and to Pippiuscattius for the pun Noctistic  
> i didn’t use it in the story, I just thought it was funny
> 
> and yes, I _am_ autistic myself~


	12. Why Does Nothing Ever Go As Fucking Planned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The quintet reaches the Disc of Cauthess

“Hey, get up.”

I groaned and rolled over. “No.”

“Come on, I’m already awake. That means you have to be, too.”

“Too tired. Please try again tomorrow.”

“Do I need to rip the blanket off you again?”

I groaned again and sat up, glaring at Noctis.

“Fine…” I growled. I rubbed at my eyes, blinking sleep away. My gaze softened at the memory of what occurred last night. When I had stopped crying, we went back into the caravan, hardly saying a word besides bidding each other good night.

“You okay?” he asked. I nodded, and slowly stood. “You, uh, feel better?”

I laughed slightly. “As good as I can be. Thank you, really.”

“Yeah. No problem. Ignis has breakfast ready. Come out when you’re ready.”

When I stepped out into the morning sun, I was greeted with a cheerful hello from Prompto and a softly concerned Ignis. Apparently he had woken up last night when Noctis left the bed and saw we were both gone.

“It’s all good, now,” I explained. “Just a bit homesick, is all.”

“Why don’t you talk about it?” Prompto asked as I sat down. I lifted an eyebrow and asked him why I would do that. “Well, I mean, wouldn’t it help you feel better?”

I barked a laugh. “Talking about it? Ha, no, I prefer to internalize all my problems so they eat away at me from the inside until I’m unable to function in any way.”

Ignis gave me a disapproving glance. I ignored his gaze and sat down next to Prompto. Ardyn looked on, amused and silent, for once.

“Same,” Noctis said, taking my other side. “So, you think we have time to practice with the elemental magic after this?”

“I don’t see why we shouldn’t,” Ignis said, looking at our guide. “After all, the Archaean isn’t going anywhere.”

Noct and I picked at our food while Ardyn smirked.

“Take all the time you need,” he said. “And thank you very much for the meal.”

Practicing magic was fun. Practicing magic was _very_ fun. When I wasn’t focusing.

...Noct had managed to burn himself.

“Come here, Noct.” I smiled as I stalked towards him. He backed away.

“No, I can heal myself,” he protested. I increased my pace. “Dammit, stop.”

“Just let me-”

“-no!”

“Come here!”

“I said no!”

I chased him round the same area I had trained at with Prompto. We speed-walked in circles, never getting too close. My hand was outstretched, outlined with a dark turquoise, ready to do its job. A stupid smile etched into my face. Noct grinned slightly, not letting me get more than a couple inches within range.

“If you two are quite done acting like children,” Ignis pushed his glasses up, “I believe you were working on quantity and aim.”

It took a warning from Gladio to get us going. We isolated a small bush and I worked on lighting it on fire and putting it out with Blizzara. The grass all around the bush had gotten scorched, but not the plant itself. I groaned.

“Is that all this is good for?” I asked. “Changing temperature enough to harm? Can’t I make something solid from the ice? Like a snowball?”

“I wouldn’t doubt that you could,” Ignis said from the sidelines. “But practice makes perfect. Once you’ve mastered this, you can work on technique.”

Hell froze over again as my frustration caused the whole area to become dusted with frost.

 

The rest of the ride was filled with impatience and anticipation of finally facing the Archaean. After helping Noct more with his unofficial autism diagnosis, I opened my history book in order to ignore the growing anxiety radiating from everyone in the car. I had gotten bored of reading small accounts of kings and queens doing various yet similar feats and moved to the forming of the Empire of Niflheim.

It turned out that Niflheim was the outcome of attempting to recreate about the glory of Solheim. That caught my interest, and I read on. House Aldercapt had served as leaders of the empire for ages. A while ago, like, several hundred years, they had left Tenebrae alone, but allowing their close ties with Lucis to continue. Twelve years ago, however, that had ceased after the previous Oracle, Lady Lunafreya’s mother, was killed while Noct and his dad were there. There had been nothing they could do.

Next was the creation of the MTs, the robot things we had been fighting forever. They had been created in the labs of Verstael Bersithia, with much help from…

My heart nearly leaped out of my chest.

_**Ardyn Izunia.** _

I stared at the name on the page for what felt like forever. Had we been traveling with the enemy for a day? Had we really been trusting him? Was he actually the chancellor or was Ardyn just a common name here? Unsure of how to approach the subject, I nudged Ignis and pointed to the passage in the book. As he read, I heard him inhale sharply. A few moments went by.

“Noct?” he asked, on edge.

“Yeah?”

“We have a problem.”

“What kind of problem?”

“The man who’s leading us, our _guide…_ may or may not be the _chancellor of Niflheim.”_

Noct almost completely stopped the car, swerving violently. I was knocked into Gladio and squashed between him and Ignis.

“Watch it!” Gladio warned.

“Keep driving,” Iggy said.

“Keep driving?” Noct repeated. “Are you nuts?!”

“We don’t know for sure, and besides, this is the only way to reach Titan before the empire.”

“I think they’ve reached him already-!”

“Listen, Noct: we can stop and confront him now and risk you not receiving Titan’s blessing, or we can continue on and play along. The longer he thinks we’re under his spell, the more power we’ll have over _him.”_

Noctis said nothing. His grip on the wheel looked dangerous. He thought it over, sighing in great frustration before agreeing.

“Fine,” he growled. “But if something goes wrong-!”

“Then you can deal with it however you like.”

The ride went silent for a good while. I almost felt kinda bad about pointing it out, but the more aware we were, the better. ...Right?

I fiddled around on my phone for a bit. It was reaching a very low battery but I had nothing else to do. Reading had gotten boring and the landscape repeated itself. I sighed and leaned back, turning my phone off.

“So…” Prompto said, cutting the silent tension with a quick metaphorical bullet. “Didja look more into the whole Noct-tistic thing?”

I snorted. That was a perfect pun and I loved it.

“Yeah,” Noctis said. “It… makes more sense the more I think about it. And _______ is right. It’s not a bad thing. Everything about my life suddenly seems… to be explained, I guess. But, uh, don’t treat me too differently, okay?”

“What a mentally diverse group we are,” Ignis said.

“Explains why it’s hard to get you to focus on certain things,” Gladio said.

“And the fishing,” I added.

“What’s with you and my fishing?” Noctis asked.

“It just seemed weird that a _prince_ likes _fishing,_ but now that we’ve established your aspie-ness, it makes sense.”

“What’s an aspie?” Prompto asked.

“Name for people who have Asperger’s Syndrome.”

“Is there a difference between that and autism?” Ignis asked.

“Nope. It was added back into the spectrum recently. The symptoms are so similar, I guess there wasn’t any reason to establish them as different things.”

The trip lightened up a little for a while. For about thirty more minutes, we followed Ardyn through the desert landscape. We talked more about random things and I learned Ignis was rather wary of Noctis’ driving habits. And then we came to a large, closed gate. Ardyn drove to the side of it so we could pass and stopped. Noctis pulled up.

“We’re here,” our guide said.

“Better not be a setup,” Noctis ground out.

“Have I given you any reason to doubt me?”

“You don’t exactly inspire confidence,” Prompto said.

“Yeah, not very straightforward,” Gladio added.

“Hello!” Ardyn called out to whoever was working the gate. “It’s me! Be so kind as to open up!”

As the gate opened, Prompto said, “Wow, that worked?”

“I may not look like much, but I do have _some_ influence. Aren’t you glad we came together?”

Ignis and I exchanged a suspicious glance. That added to our new intel on Ardyn being the imperial chancellor.

“Your audience with divinity lies ahead.”

“You’re leaving?”

“I drop you at the Archaean’s open door, and with that, bid you farewell.”

Noctis paused a moment, unsure of whether to continue. Ignis prompted him to and we entered the Disc.

There wasn’t much to see inside. Just rock walls and bumpy roads. The white crystals of the Meteor jutted out to the right. We’d have have to find our way down.

“I’ve met some weirdos…” Gladio muttered.

“I hope we never meet that one again,” Ignis said. I nodded.

“You gotta admit, the guy knew his stuff about nursery rhymes,” Prompto said.

“Yeah, nothing creepy about that,” Noctis said sarcastically. We came up to some crumbling columns. The limestone creeped out, merging with the natural stone we parked on. “So we keep going this way.”

“Then we’ll find out what the empire’s up to,” Gladio said.

We made our way through the narrow passageway before us. The light rock under our feet brought back memories from the royal tombs we had already been.

“These ruins…” Ignis breathed.

“They _do_ look familiar,” I said.

_I guess they’re of similar origin._

Noctis led us down the path, beneath broken buttresses and fallen walls. We came out into the light, and there in front of us was a balcony overlooking the Meteor. And lying in the center was a stone coffin.

“Is that what I think it is?” Prompto asked in disbelief.

“Didn’t expect to find a royal tomb here,” Ignis said.

There was something odd about this particular tomb. I felt pulled to it, like I felt pulled to Noctis. But at the same time, a bitter taste rested in my mouth. Whoever rested here must’ve had one hell of a life.

Noctis reached out a hand to the two-handed sword on the coffin. It floated up into the air and swooped down to Noctis, piercing him in the chest. The other two mystical weapons joined it to float around him and then burst into sparkles, disappearing.

Right after, I fell to the ground as an earthquake shook the ground.

“Here we go again!” Prompto exclaimed. He tumbled down as well.

“This one’s huge!” Gladio shouted.

“Get away!” Ignis ordered. “Quickly!”

I watched Noct fall to his knees as Titan stirred and caused him another headache. The balcony began to crumble down. My heart nearly stopped as Noctis and Gladio tried their best to run forward.

_“NOCTIS!”_ I screeched as he fell over the edge. I scrambled to my feet and moved to see where he had gone. Our moment from the night before played in my head. I was nearly crying as Ignis pulled me back.

“Look,” he said, his arm still holding me. He, Prompto, and I watched the Meteor move. It shifted, slowly, and reared back, showing a humanoid giant with golden swirls on his skin. “The Archaean.”

A strange noise came from Titan. It sounded like garbled nonsense. As it pierced the air, a sharp pain shot through my head. I gasped and clutched at my forehead, eyes tearing up. It went away as soon as it had come.

_If that’s what Noctis has been dealing with this whole time, then he is a real trooper._

“Noct!” Prompto called out. Ignis and I joined him at the edge now that the earth had stopped quaking. “You okay?”

I saw Noct and Gladio standing on a ledge at the bottom. A great sigh of relief left me.

“Thank heavens you’re safe,” Ignis said. “Is there a way back up?”

“No, but there’s a path!” Noctis shouted. “We’re gonna see where it leads!”

“You three try to get down!” Gladio said.

“Very well,” Ignis agreed. “We’ll look for a way. Be careful, now.”

“You too!” Noct called. “Take extra care of ______!”

“Of course!”

“What?” Prompto exclaimed. “We’re going _where?!”_

“Quickly!”

Prompto, Ignis, and I backtracked to the walls surrounding what was left of the royal tomb. There wasn’t really any other way to go but back to the car, so we went that way. As Ignis and Prompto ran, I did my best to keep up. A crack in the right wall caught my eye. I stopped to look through.

“______, hurry!”

“I think there’s a way through here,” I said. The crack looked big enough for us to slip through. It had been opened by the earthquake, hidden by boulders. Ignis ran over to it. “Look, it runs deep.”

“I think there’s light coming through at the other end. Hurry, now, you two first.”

I followed Prompto with Ignis at the end. We scraped our way through the crack. It opened up into a natural path leading down. The ground shook again. Heat welled up from the earth, fires from the magma below sprouting from slits in the rock. We were sweating within minutes.

The natural rocky road leading to more even grounding started out very dangerous. There wasn’t much room for good footing. We slipped several times but stayed up with sheer determination. I clung to the rock, and Ignis’ hand when I needed it, and did my best not to look down. Prompto was whimpering half the way down. Ignis somehow remained in control of himself.

The ground began rumbling again when we had almost made it to the new ledge. My heart pounded as we stopped to let the quake pass. Suddenly, the planet’s crust split, separating our little path from the rest of the mountain.

“Blast!” Ignis said, barely audible over Titan’s wrath. “Prompto, do you see any other way down?”

“Uhh…” Prompto searched around for anything. “If we move sideways, we might be able to make it to that overhang.”

To our right was an outcropping overshadowing the ledges below. It was slightly below us, so we’d be able to make it if we were careful.

_I’m going to die. We’re all going to die._

_Shh._

I inched my way along the stone, following Prompto’s path and occasionally checking on Ignis. My foot slipped at one point and my heart nearly stopped. Grasping the rock as tightly as I could, I moved to lower myself down like Prompto had. The overhang was close. Just a bit more and we’d make it.

Unfortunately, I am not as strong as my four new friends. My hands were sweating and my whole body shook with nervousness. I began to panic when I couldn’t find any good place to put my foot. Deciding that moving forward was more important, I just put it where I thought it could hold for a few seconds at least. When my other foot lifted, I slipped.

My arms jerked as I managed to hold onto some rock jutting out. Pain screeched through my limbs, causing me to cry out. I could hear Ignis and Prompto panicking. All I focused on was keeping what little hold I had on the rock. My hands started to slip as well.

“No no no no no,” I whispered. “Come on, come on.”

I fell.

The wind whirled around me for a moment. Then there was a thud as I hit the overhang and almost rolled off it completely. My fingers were clinging to the ledge. I tried pulling myself up but it wouldn't work. I wasn't strong enough. My heart was pounding so quickly that all I could hear was its beat and my own frantic breathing.

_Now I’m **really** going to die._

Someone called out my name. I looked up to see Prompto and Ignis reaching the ledge. Their feet hit it as I began to slip again. Right when my hands left the stone, they each grabbed one and hauled me up. I was alive. We were fine. Everything was fine.

It really wasn’t. I hardly got any time to recover. Ignis pulled me up and looked me over.

“Are you alright?” he asked. I barely nodded.

“I think so,” I said coarsely. A few coughs from the dust and smoke left my throat.

“Good. You had us worried there for a moment.”

“Ignis, look!” Prompto called. We all turned to see a bright flash of blue gleaming in the air as Noctis surged forward with his weapons to meet Titan’s fist. My heart jumped with worry. “We gotta get down there!”

As Noctis settled to warping around the area to fight off Titan’s attacks, we made our way to the other end of the ledge. That’s when we saw the airships and MTs. Ignis cursed very lowly under his breath. I would’ve laughed in any other situation.

We waited and watched. One of the ships settled very close to us. Ignis pushed his glasses up.

“Quickly, now,” he said. “Onto that airship. We’ll take it out and maneuver to the ground.”

“Um, how?” I asked.

“Jump! Quickly!”

“You want me to do _what?”_

Prompto got a running start and I watched him fly, limbs flailing, through the air and land painfully on the roof of the ship.

“I’ll go first,” Iggy said. “You follow behind me when I get up.”

Ignis’ leap was much more graceful, like a cat. I backed up on the ledge, heart fluttering in panic.

“Oh God I can’t do this,” I muttered. “I can’t do this. I can’t _do_ this!”

Ignis called out my name.

_Noctis is counting on you._

_You’ve got to help them!_

_What if they get hurt and need you to heal them?_

_Maybe if you fall and die you’ll get sent back home._

With the last thought as fleeting as the others, my body made the decision for me and dove off the cliff. My heart might’ve actually stopped for a few seconds. Then Ignis and Prompto caught me just in time. The airship jerked into motion. We sat on its roof and waited to see what would happen. It came to hover just above the ground. The Magitek soldiers came pouring out, ready to fire and swing at the outlines of Noctis and Gladio.

Ignis gave us the signal to hop down and attack. I slid down the side of the ship and hit a boulder. My feet stumbled over the top and I nearly tripped on my way to the actual ground. Once we knew we were all in one piece, we ran off to join our remaining friends.

The defeat of Titan came a lot quicker than I had expected. Prompto and Ignis had their own little technique that called for magic flasks of ice. However, instead of receiving a flask, I was instructed to use my magic to freeze over the god’s arm. So I did. Noctis landed the final blow. The frozen part of the giant’s arm crumbled and shattered into rocky pieces. The Archaean fell forward, landing on what was left.

The ground began to sparkle. Little glowing specks floated up from the earth. Titan reared back, summoning forth some kind of power. Noctis’ and my visions went white. Pain shot through our heads. I saw nothing, but Noctis had gotten an image of the Oracle speaking with Titan. Noctis understood the covenant had been forged and received Titan’s blessing. Then we were left among the remaining rock and fire. With no way out.

The empire’s airships retreated now that Titan had disappeared. All but one ship flew off. The one that stayed drifted down closer until we could see the doors being lifted open. There, in the ship, was the figure of Ardyn. He stood oh so casually.

“Fancy meeting you here!” He shouted. “It occurred to me I never formally introduced myself! Izunia! _Ardyn_ Izunia!”

“So ______ was correct!” Ignis said. “I had a feeling we hadn’t seen the last of you, the _imperial chancellor.”_

Ardyn looked taken aback. He recovered quickly.

“At your service,” he said, “and more importantly, to your aid!”

We had no other choice. It either accept his help once more or die among the ruins of the Meteor. Noctis and Gladio climbed up first. The latter pulled me up before helping the other two. As soon as I righted myself, I flung my arms around Noctis.

“You’re alive,” I whispered. He awkwardly but loosely returned the gesture. An odd pull tugged in my chest for a moment. I ignored it and pulled away. “I was- _we_ were so worried.”

“What am I, chopped liver?” Gladio scoffed. He received the same welcome. “That’s more like it.”

“Thanks heavens you’re both alright,” Ignis said. Ardyn had disappeared for a moment. I assumed he was checking on whoever was flying the ship. I inspected the state of both Noct and Gladio.

The edges of their clothes were singed, burns littering their flesh, and both sagged under the weight of there being more to deal with. I rushed forward, Ignis attempting and failing to hold me back.

Noct was the worst off. He didn’t show it, but the pain and aches I felt after placing a hand on his shoulder had me doubling over and shrieking slightly. _Everything_ hurt. My legs wobbled and my arms could hardly come up to support myself. Every inch of my skin burned and felt the piercing of several blades and bullets like sharp needles to my very flesh. Lastly, the pain of being hit by many buses at once overwhelmed me. I fell back into Ignis.

“How many times must we tell you?” he scolded. “We have medicine for this!”

“It hurts,” I whined. “I don’t think a potion could take all of it away.”

Ardyn stepped back into the room. His eyes narrowed as he saw me in pain, trying to heal Gladio. Noctis helped Ignis keep me back.

“That’s enough,” Ignis said sternly. “You’re already exhausted.”

“But-!”

“No buts,” Noctis cut in. “You need to rest.”

“Everything alright?” Ardyn said, calling our attention to him. Gladio glared at him. “Why don’t you all take a seat? We’re in for a long ride.”

Ignis helped me to find a place along the left wall. Noctis sat to my left, keeping an eye on me. The other three completed a small circle around us. I struggled to keep my body upright. Noct let me mean against him again.

“And what will you do with us now?” Ignis interrogated angrily. He stood to face Ardyn. I hadn’t seen him so upset before.

“Why, grant you safe passage, just as I said,” the man in question answered smoothly.

“Pretty generous offer,” Prompto said, “for an _imperial.”_

I did my best to give him a disapproving stare.

“Come now,” Ardyn said slowly. “Is it fair to begrudge a man the circumstances of his birth?”

“Well, no. I guess not.”

I couldn’t help but smirk slightly. Burn, Prom. You shouldn’t judge someone based on something like their home country.

Ignis dropped down to crouch near my right. He inspected me carefully. Too exhausted to protest, I let him.

“So what do we so after he drops us off?” Gladio asked.

“Go get the car.” Noct said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Can’t leave her unattended for long,” Ignis said. He stood to address Ardyn once more. “Chancellor, if you truly wish to aid in our efforts, then I request you release us this instant.”

I jerked my head toward him. “Uh, Iggy, that’s, uh, a bit of a drop…”

He didn’t hear me. Neither did Ardyn.

“This instant?” the latter repeated. “It’s a long way down. Perhaps the army could break your fall.”

_Sounds painful._

“Or perhaps you could simply sit back and enjoy the ride. You needn’t worry - you’re in good hands with me.”

On the topic of where to drop us off, the guys decided that the chocobo post would be good. Prompto seemed ecstatic and I certainly looked forward to seeing the giant birds in person. Well, not as giant as the one guarding the stones that one guy wanted, but still. I imagined chocobos were as big as ostriches since they were able to be ridden.

The ride felt like it took forever. I drifted in and out of consciousness, trying my best to stay awake. Noctis and Gladio told us what happened on their end. Learning about Titan smacking Noctis around made the whole hit-by-a-bus feeling understandable. Then Ignis summarized our own journey down the Disc, thankfully skipping over the part where I had almost fallen to my death. We spent the majority of the rest of the ride in silence. When we arrived at the chocobo post, Noctis helped me out of the airship while Ardyn bid us farewell.

“Here’s to hoping you find that car of yours…”


	13. The Tale of Sleipnir and the Mage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternate Title: “How To Train Your Chocobo”

The chocobo post was your average horse ranch in a forest but without covered stables and without the horses. The bright yellow birds stood and preened their feathers while little chicks frolicked and played. I gasped at how cute the chicks were.

_“I want ten,”_ I gushed “They’re so cute!”

“Me too!” Prompto cheered. “Then we’d have twenty!”

At the center of the ranch, amidst a few lunch tables, stood Wiz, the man who ran the establishment. He undoubtedly looked like a man who had been doing this for a while with graying hair, faded clothes, and the general display of having many experiences in his eyes. Noctis and Ignis explained the situation while Prompto and I attempted to get the chicks’ attentions. We had no luck.

“Well you’re plenty welcome to stay here,” I heard Wiz say. I stood up. “There’s a caravan down thataways and several campsites around the lake. If you need somethin’ eat, you can grab a bite here.”

We thanked the good man and made our way to the caravan. Prompto immediately flopped down onto one of the beds.

“I could sleep _forever,”_ he sighed.

“Big mood,” I said.

“What’s a mood?” Gladio asked.

“Just means ‘saaame.’”

“Gotcha.”

Luckily they had attached an air conditioner to the caravan. The air cooled us all down. I lied on one of the small couches, staring at the ceiling. Soon the boys began to wash themselves up. It was a thing, too. They were filthy after getting smacked upside the head several times by Titan. I remained on my couch.

I managed to get a small nap in. I awoke to the sound of thunder in the distance. Ignis sat across from me, his small notebook in hand. A sleeping Noct occupied a bed.

Iggy exhaled. I looked at him.

“Running low on supplies…” he muttered to himself.

“Where do we get them?” I asked sleepily. He gasped slightly, jumping a bit.

“______,” he said. “You startled me.”

I laughed for a few seconds. “Sorry. Well, not really. But still.”

He pushed his glasses up, causing me to do the same.

“We can either buy ingredients or forage for them in the wild,” he answered my question.

“Forage?” I echoed “That seems- wait, what?”

He chuckled. “There are certain procurement points we can find. If we hurry, we might be able to gather enough for the next few days. Would you like to join me?”

I blinked. “Isn’t that… unsanitary?”

“Not if we wash them thoroughly. It is what humans did before civilization.”

I blinked again.

“As for worms, well, we’ll have to hope the early birds got to them.”

I agreed after the joke.

 

“Um, do you know where we’re going?” I asked. We had been walking for ages and had only found a few things to take back.

“Not particularly,” Ignis replied. What? Wasn’t he usually the prepared one? “If we stick near the ranch, we should be able to find our way back.”

“Right…”

If only Google Maps could save us.

I followed alongside my fellow glasses wearer, holding a basket we had found that no one was using. The sky grew dark with clouds. Evening would come soon. I could smell its sweetness in the air. Or maybe that was the rain.

We continued on in relative silence for awhile. I started humming quietly, a tune only I knew. The trees passed by, some broken and bent, others standing proud. A lake beheld majesty beyond the treeline. A large creature that reminded me of an elephant waded in the mirroring water. The small stretch of grass from the forest to the water’s edge was home to many animals I had never seen before. Big and round ones bumbled about on tiny feet. I thought they looked kinda like giant armadillos.

“I hope you’re enjoying your stay here,” Ignis said, cutting my thoughts in half. “Well, as much as you can.”

“Yeah.” I nodded. “It’s been… weird but nice.”

He smiled. “Glad to hear it.”

Quiet. An aura of anticipation arose. He was going to ask me something, I could feel it.

“I suppose I should tell you I didn’t bring you out here just to scavenge.”

“Is this the part where you kill me and say an animal did it?”

He laughed. “No, absolutely not.”

The sincerity grew as he fixed his glasses.

“I wanted to know how you’re doing. How you’re _really_ doing.”

“O-oh, um… Okay, I guess? I’m super homesick sometimes, mostly at night, but… With everything that’s happened lately, I’ve been too distracted to think about it constantly.”

“Well, that’s good to hear. But are there any concerns or questions you have? That I can truly answer, I mean.”

“Um… Hmm…”

He let me think it over for a moment.

“My mental state has never been… the greatest. I had medicine I’d take back home for it, but now that I’m on a different _planet,_ I don’t exactly know where to get any. Or if I can even take it. Then there’s the whole reason I came here, but I don’t think any of us know that.”

“I see. What kind of medication did you take? Perhaps we’ll be able to find something suitable for you.”

“Antidepressants. And it took me five tries to get it right with some unpleasant consequences.”

“Yes, I’ve heard the chemical imbalance can be tricky to fix… But it’ll be a start. As for your purpose here, well, the only theories I have so far are: you being here is merely an extreme coincidence of chance, or… the gods brought you here for some reason.”

I stared at the ground as we walked. For some reason, the thought of unknown gods influencing my fate did not sit well with me.

“Everything alright?”

“It’s just… well, it’s unfair, but it’s also really, _really_ inconsiderate.”

“I agree. But seeing your reaction to Titan’s fury does solidify that particular theory. It’s almost as if you somehow share some of House Caelum’s power…”

I whirled around in shock.

“What?!” I exclaimed. Ignis stopped. “But I’m not even _from_ here!”

“Exactly. Which begs the question: why would the gods grant you such a gift?”

 

Ignis and I managed to find more ingredients. Not enough for a full week, but we could always get more. When we arrived back at the caravan, Noctis had awoken and was playing King’s Knight with Prompto and Gladio. He told us he called Cindy and she was now on the lookout for the Regalia. Twilight fell. Soon it came time to eat. Dinner consisted of curry and rice, one of which I loved, the other I despised.

I lifted a spoonful of… whatever substance covered half my plate. I sniffed, wrinkling my nose at the spicy smell. Not wanting to seem ungrateful, part of the spoon was cleaned of its rider. I instantly started coughing. The food was _hot._ And not just any hot. It was _spicy._ My tongue started tingling, mouth warming to an unbearable degree. It didn’t even taste good.

Someone snorted. The others snickered as I downed half a bottle of water.

“What, can’t handle your curry?” Gladio teased. I looked down at my plate.

_“That’s_ what this is?” I asked, appalled. I groaned. “No wonder…”

I scooped up some untouched rice and hoped it would replace the lingering taste and feel of the curry. I had never liked curry. The first time I tried it was in a restaurant in London on a school summer trip. Never again, I vowed. No more spices for me. None. The rest of that night I just ate the naan bread while my friend enjoyed her spicy hell they called a food.

“No curry for _____,” Ignis said. “Noted.”

“Sorry… The only spicy I like is mint, and that’s not even considered a spice.”

“Mint?” Prompto questioned.

“Mint is cold spicy. Like if cold had a taste. Well, it does, but I mean, like, a different, more distinguished taste.”

“You have really interesting thought processes,” Noct commented.

“Cold has a taste?” Gladio asked. “What’s it taste like?”

“Snow,” I answered, nodding. “Or certain kinds of ice. Mint is, of course, the best flavor. Right up there with cinnamon and snickerdoodles.”

“What’s a… snickerdoodle?” Noct repeated. My jaw dropped.

“Please tell me you have cookies here.”

“Uh, yeah…?”

“You mean to tell me you _don’t have snickerdoodles?”_

“That’s a cookie?”

“Sounds like some sort of code word,” Gladio quipped. I let out a prolonged whine that gradually descended in pitch until I sounded like the undead.

_“How do you not have snickerdoodles?_ ” I emphasized. “They’re only the best cookies ever! Like chocolate chip! But not, obviously. It’s cinnamon and tastes like coziness.”

It piqued Ignis’ interest and he soon was writing down more things in his notebook.

The next morning, Prompto eagerly woke us up for the chocobos. I changed shirts, now wearing the one with the black chocobo on it. Noctis and I stepped out into morning sunshine, rubbing our eyes. I hissed a bit at the sun’s bright glare.

“Good morning,” Ignis greeted, nodding.

“A morning’s only good if it’s a late one,” I muttered.

“Agreed,” Noct said.

After breakfast, Prompto dashed over to Wiz to tell him we’d like to ride the chocobos. My heart sank when the man said they couldn’t go out. When we asked why, he told us about some giant beast terrorizing the woods named Deadeye. That alone had me shivering. Noctis and the boys decided to take on the hunt. I asked if they were okay to do that after fighting Titan.

“You can sit this one out if you want,” Noct said. “Sounds pretty dangerous.”

I thought it over. I could get some extra rest, maybe play with the chocochicks. But what if my friends needed me? Did they really? I’d just be another person to worry about.

“Yeah…” I said. “I think I will. Sorry.”

“No, it’s fine,” Noct said. “We’ll be back soon, okay?”

I nodded. Once they had left, I went to wander around the chocobo post. I found a book on a table that piqued my interest. Cosmogony. My heart flitted around in excitement. Mythology that was _real._ No one seemed to be looking for it, so I took it back to the caravan to read.

As I read through the first book in the tome, a picture caught my attention. An icy blue lady with little to cover her was fixed in the center of the page. Crescent moon wings sprouted from her back. The trim around the image frosted the edges and spiraled inward like a snowstorm until it reached her.

_Have I seen her somewhere before…?_

Blinding pain shot through my head and my vision went white.

_“And thus, the Lost Child reaches the angel’s guard.”_

_A soft voice spoke behind me and I whipped around to see- a blur. What was I seeing? An angel? She was- yes, she - blue with wings sprouting from her back. I couldn’t make out a face, and suddenly the air became cold._

“The Lost Child of Eos…”

My head whipped up from its resting place on my chest. Gaze darting all over the caravan, nothing caught my eye. There was no one there but me.

_The fuck…? Now I’m hearing things…_

I rubbed my forehead, the pain starting to ebb away slowly.

_I hate to say it, but maybe some fresh air would be good._

_Yeah, that’s enough reading for today. I wonder if that had something to do with what Ignis said yesterday…_

I spent some time sitting on the ground with the baby chocochicks. They ran over my lap and nibbled my hair. One nestled itself in my crossed legs for a nap. Its yellow down caressed my hand as it passed over. So soft! So cute! If only my phone was still on so I could take a picture.

Another chick brought me a small stick that I threw for it. While we played fetch, Wiz came over to watch.

“You the gal travelin’ with those boys?” he asked. I tilted my head up and nodded, smile fading slightly. “You seem good with the birds. Wouldja be interested in helping ‘em out a bit?”

I tipped my head to the side. “What would I be doing?”

“Just feedin’ ‘em is all. I’m sure they’ll take to ya just like the chicks.”

The one in my lap chose that moment to run off after its siblings. It made the decision for me.

“Sure,” I said, standing up and dusting my hands off. Wiz led me over to the stables. Beautiful yellow birds stood in each stall, each similar but with their own look. My smile returned.

“Now they get rowdy around feeding time, so you just gotta have patience. And caution. Those beaks can do some nasty damage even on accident.”

One of the stable hands showed me how it was done as her break was coming up and her coworker had taken the day off. Soon I carried a basket of greens.

The first chocobo greeted me vigorously, rushing up and trying to snatch the greens from my basket. I held out a hand to stop him.

“If you’re not patient, you’ll get some last,” I warned. He seemed to understand and stood down, ruffling his feathers. It was comical, in a way, a small girl scolding a very large chicken.

The next couple ate their fill ravenously, but thankfully stayed still. The fourth reared back excitedly and I scrambled to get out of range before he calmed down. The fifth and sixth minded their own business like I didn’t exist. They ate when I left.

The last chocobo shied away from the new face she saw. I tried tempting her with a nice juicy leaf. She backed away. I tapped my chin. How could I get her to eat? I stared at the ground and snapped my fingers. ...Maybe I got that from Ignis.

Once a few greens were on the stable floor in her stall, I stood a few feet away. She eyed me cautiously. I turned my head, pretending not to be paying attention. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched her slowly inch towards the last of the greens. She dragged one leaf back a bit and ate it. Then she deemed it safe to continue. I admired her elegance and pretty feathers. A few of them were faintly tipped with black. If I was just a bit closer, I’d be able to see them better…

She drew back as I stepped forward. I halted. She stopped eating. I looked away. She tried another leaf. I turned back to her. She stopped again. One of my hands was outstretched. She glanced at it and chirped warily. I pulled it back. Her eyes met mine. She took a step back. I put my head down, a familiar scene in mind. Hand reaching forward, I waited.

Warm breath tingled my hand. I didn’t move and forced my breath to steady. A beak nudged my hand. And then…

I giggled as she nuzzled my head, sniffing. I turned back to her, petting her soft feathers. She qweyed cheerily at me and I laughed more, using both hands to tend to her.

“You’re just a bit shy, like me,” I told her quietly. “Do you have a name?”

A low chirp was her answer.

“Well, well, well, I’ll be!” Wiz came walking over. “That one doesn’t usually take to strangers. She must like you.”

I smiled at her. “Do they have names?”

Wiz shook his head.

“Nah,” he said. “Well, some of ‘em do, but we usually leave the names to the riders.”

I looked back at my new friend.

“Sleipnir,” I whispered. She nuzzled my hand. “I’ll call you Sleipnir.”


	14. Saxa, cuniculēs, et bona temporēs!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader and friends take a trip to a mine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “Stones, mines, and good times!”

“Haha, see you at the finish line!”

“Hey! Get back here!”

Prompto and his bird, Apollo, rushed ahead of me and Sleipnir. We both exhaled frustratedly and picked up our pace. Riding chocobos had taken some getting used to, but it was fun. We spent the rest of yesterday doing so after they proclaimed Deadeye dead. Now I was determined to win this race, my mostly unused competitive side peeking out.

Sleipnir was swift and eager with the right people. Apparently that meant me, according to Wiz. We got used to each other fairly quickly and had already beaten Noctis. Our smaller frames meant more agility. But Prompto was the smallest of the boys and he gave us a run for our money. But we had determination.

_Stay determined. The thought of winning this chocobo race fills you with determination._

A quick turn between Prom and the corner had us pulling ahead. I heard him shout as another slight kick left him in the dust. The finish line greeted us warmly and soon I hopped down, giving Sleipnir congratulatory pets.

The boys had let me name all their chocobos. Prompto’s was Apollo, Ignis’ was Minerva, Gladio’s was Odin, and Noctis’ was Hades. I felt proud of myself. Both boys and birds seemed to like the names. It made me happy.

Gladio and Noct took off.

“Very impressive,” Ignis said. I ruffled Sleipnir’s feathers.

“She did all the work,” I said. She chirped happily.

“That’s the third time!” Prompto cried. “I thought I had you!”

“We are small and swift,” I said matter-of-factly.

“You’re not much shorter than me.”

“I’m five four.”

“Yeah, but… still!”

The races didn’t take too long. Noctis managed to beat Gladio by a second. Then he took on Ignis. And lost. A few more and we headed back to the post for lunch. While we were there, we overheard someone talking about a mine not far from there. It was rumored to be haunted by daemons.

“Think we should check it out?” Noctis asked.

“It wouldn’t hurt to,” Ignis said. “Perhaps we can find a royal tomb nearby.”

We got directions from Wiz and, when lunch was finished, set off for the mines.

_“Why_ is it in a desert?” I complained, mostly to myself.

“It must be rich in resources,” Ignis replied.

“I’m getting gold rush flashbacks, and I wasn't even there. Call me a forty-niner in two thousand nineteen.”

“Two thousand nineteen?” Noctis questioned.

“The year back home.”

“Your world is only two thousand nineteen years old?” Prompto asked. I rolled my eyes.

“No, it’s four point eight _billion_ years old. The year is fashioned in which year it is after Christ’s birth. Any time before that is either BC or BCE. They mean the same thing. Ancient civilizations.”

“Who’s Christ?” Gladio asked.

“He’s the man who died for our sins to be forgiven, God’s son. His name was Jesus. He traveled the land of Israel, teaching scripture and healing and helping people. And he cursed a fig tree once. That was funny.”

“Why?” Noct asked.

“It didn’t have any fruit so he got mad.”

“So you worship this man?” Ignis inquired.

“Ahh, some people do. Er, a _lot_ of people do. We worship God, and there are three persons in him, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.”

“Isn’t that just three gods?” Gladio asked. I shook my head.

“I think of it as… the Son and Holy Spirit come from the Father, but the Spirit also comes from the Son. It’s called the Trinity.”

“I… Okay.”

“God created the world, right? And then he made his son who came down to die for our sins so that we may have eternal life. And from those two comes the Holy Spirit, the Lord, the giver of life.”

_Oops I slipped into church speech there._

“Okay, that makes more sense,” Prompto said. “I think.”

“But not everyone worships the same god or gods. There are lots of different religions.”

“That’s so strange,” Noctis said. “Doesn’t everyone disagree on which ones are real?”

I slumped over Sleipnir.

“Yes,” I said weakly, voice cracking. “It’s kind of a problem. I wish everyone could just get along but alas, that is not the case, ever.”

The Balouve Mines were in a broken, closed off area. Train tracks trailed a path through the tall fence someone left open. We got down from our chocobos. I inspected the tracks. Yep. Trains.

“You guys have trains but not planes?!” I exclaimed.

“Uh, what’s a plane?” Prompto asked, confused. I groaned.

The inside of the mine was pitch black. Our little flashlight pins flicked on. An elevator rested not far from the entrance. It did not look safe. I hesitated.

“Um, should we be using that?” I asked as Noct opened the door.

“I’m sure it’s fine,” he said. I forced myself inside.

The damn thing shook as we descended. I braced myself in case it decided it hated us. My whole body tensed and I waited. It never fell.

“See?”

The door opened and out we walked. The miners had left a few lights, but there weren’t many. At least they brightened up some parts of the place The earthy smell of dirt drifted into my nose. It was cold. Except for the buzzing electricity of the mine lights, not a sound could be heard but our own footsteps.

Small daemons popped up every so often. It proved difficult to fight in such a tight space. I kept to the back so the guys could do their thing. I helped, of course, but I feared accidentally hitting one or more of my friends.

Soon we reached an open shaft. The floor gave way to the third floor. Only the train tracks kept going on until they met the other side. Carefully, all five of us stepped across the hall. I sighed in relief at the end. It was short lived.

Behind us appeared a large, human-looking monster. He actually looked like a samurai. Goblins filled the place as he swung at us with a very large sword. Noctis managed to parry and another battle began.

While Noctis and Gladio dealt with the samurai guy, Prompto, Ignis, and I started swinging (and shooting) at the goblins. Prom and I found a good system - whatever he shot at, I landed the killing blow. It worked pretty well. Even if the only things lighting the corridor were our flashlight pins. I slashed at the little gremlins clawing at my legs. Ignis gracefully cut through them. Gladio and Noct had a hard time with the samurai.

And then we were suddenly thrown off the platform. And by we, I mean Prompto and me. The samurai disappeared.

I nearly landed on my face, tumbling over Prompto. The pain hit me like I had purposely ran and jumped sideways into a wall. The wind was knocked out of me and when I took a deep breath, dust filled my lungs and I started coughing.

“Prompto?”

“________!”

“We’re okay!” Prompto wheezed. I propped myself on my elbow. Where the flashlight pin? Hands reached out into the dark, shuffling about for the pin and…

“My glasses!” I shouted hoarsely. “I lost my glasses!”

“Shit,” someone above said.

“Just… stay down there!” Noctis said. “We’ll come get you.”

“Prompto, is there a way for you to light the area you’re in?” Ignis asked.

“Uh, I’ve got my phone,” he said. He turned on its flashlight. “Don’t know how long it’ll last.”

“Stay put,” Gladio ordered. “We’ll be there as fast as we can.”

We watched their lights dash back down the mineshaft. I sat back and crossed my legs. Prompto sighed, the light from his phone lighting his face spookily.

“How long do you think it’ll take?” I asked.

“I dunno,” he said. “Hopefully not long.”

We sat in silence for some time. I rubbed my arm, trying to make the ache go away. Then I tried brushing the dust and dirt out of my hair. When I shook my head to get some off, some of it smacked Prompto in the face. I could hear him sputtering.

“Hey!” he protested. I started giggling.

“Sorry,” I said. He placed his phone face down on the ground so the area was more illuminated. “Ah, that’s much better.”

In all the corners the light reached, my glasses could not be found. My eyes searched everywhere their field of vision could see.

“I can’t see them.”

“Your glasses?”

“Yeah.”

“Here.”

He got up onto his knees and I did the same. Together we crawled around the space looking for anything that might glint in the phone’s light. Most of what I saw was fuzzy so Prompto did most of the work.

“Oh, here there are!”

Behind a rock, my glasses lied. Prom picked them up and gave them to me. I thanked him and we went back to our sitting spots. My glasses were all dusty. Try as I might, the little specks just would not come off. I groaned slightly in frustration.

“These are useless if they aren’t clean,” I muttered. I set them in my lap. Maybe Ignis could help when he got here.

More silence. I’d expected Prompto to have conversation at the ready. Oh well. If he didn’t want to talk, then I wouldn’t force him.

There was no sound. A few clicks here and some clacks there, but otherwise… Nothing. The air was stuffy, tickling my nose. I tried not to sneeze. The earthy smell of the mine drifted all around us.

I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been in a place this dark. If Prompto didn’t shuffle every so often and the phone light was gone, I would’ve started questioning his really being there.

“Do you think they’ll really come back for us?” he asked suddenly.

“Huh?” I voiced, confused. Why would he think they wouldn’t? “Of course they will. They wouldn’t just leave us here.”

He sighed, seemingly dejected. “Yeah, I know, but… why?”

“What do you mean?”

He didn’t say anything.

“Prompto…?”

He looked… forlorn. His eyes were cast down, head doing the same. No smile adorned his face. His hands rested lazily in his lap.

“I just… don’t know why they would,” he answered quietly. Something must really bothering him.

“You’re their friend,” I said softly. “Of course they’d come back for you.”

He paused again. “Can… Can I tell you something? Since… I know you have similar feelings…”

“Of course. You can tell me anything.”

Mom Friend Mode activated.

“I…” He stopped. “Sometimes I wonder why they keep me around. I don’t really add much to the group. I’m not a prince like Noct, or smart like Ignis, or good with people like Gladio. I’m just a commoner who likes taking pictures.”

The hopelessness in his flat voice tugged at my heart.

“Prompto, you _do_ add something to the group, even if you can’t see it. Without you, it’s not as vibrant and colorful. You make them happy and help carry the weight. You’re really refreshing in stressful times.”

“That’s just it, though. I’ve worked so hard to get there. I’m the happy-go-lucky guy, always energetic and ready to go. But I don’t know if that’s who I really am, y’know? And… I think they’d be better off without me…”

Oh my heart. “I know. And it’s okay to think that. I think that about myself all the time, even before coming here.”

I gathered my thoughts.

“It’s not so much… who you look like or where you come from that matters, but what you do, who you strive to become. That’s why they consider you their friend. Because you _are.”_

“You… really think so? I’m not just… dead weight?”

“Coming from someone who similar thoughts concerning themself, yes, I do think so. Y’know, whenever I worry about being too annoying or that maybe these people just keep me around ‘cause they’re being nice, I just think about how their lives would look like without me. How mine would look without them. Is there a difference? Yes, there is.”

“I see…”

He fell quiet once more. I patiently waited to see if he had anything more to say.

“So… Without me… the guys might be really depressed and have more weight on their shoulders? And they keep me around because we’re friends and that’s what friends do. They help each other.”

“There you go. I’m proud of you.”

“Thanks, ______. I really mean it. I didn’t mean to bother you, but… I don’t know, you just feel like someone I can talk to, y’know?”

“You’re never a bother, Prompto. Not to me, not to Noctis or Gladio or Ignis. Unless you’re specifically trying to be.”

We laughed for a second.

“So, uh, think they’ll get here soon?” he asked. At that moment, the telltale sound of daemons emerging echoed from the left side of the mineshaft. The gooey, stickiness of it caused me to shiver. “Oh no.”

We stood quickly. Prompto pointed his phone down the tunnel. A horde of goblins and gremlins hissed at the light and picked up their pace. There were too many for us to take. We looked each other in the eye and simultaneously said, “Run.”

We took off down the hall in the opposite direction. The daemons somehow ran faster and faster, crawling all over the floor and walls. I summoned my sword to slash at a few that picked at my jeans. Prompto fired a few shots behind us. A squelch met my ears, signalling he had killed one or two.

“Nice!” I shouted.

“Thanks!”

A fork in the road greeted us. Prompto shouted to go left when he saw a minecart blocking the right side. I gripped my glasses tightly and veered left. My heart was pounding, and I was starting to run out of breath. My footing stumbled and I slowed. My sword swung out at the goblins trying to catch me. I couldn’t keep up.

_I’m going die I’m going to die I’m going to die I’m going to die_

Right as Prompto realized I lagged behind, a flash of light suddenly lit our path and-

-I smacked right into Noctis. Gladio managed to catch Prompto, but Noct and I tumbled over. We both coughed. The other three began the fight with the daemons.

“Watch where you’re going,” Noct scolded.

“Sorry, I didn’t realize there’d be _people_ in an empty mineshaft!” I retorted.

“Now is not the time for arguing,” Ignis said. Now that there were five of us, the goblins were gone within minutes. “Are you two alright?”

“Yep!” Prompto said. “That was a close one.”

“No one’s hurt?” Noctis asked. I shook my head.

“My glasses are dirty, though,” I told him. Ignis offered to fix them for me. They were pristine when he handed them back. “Wow thanks. I don’t think they’ve ever been this clean before.”

“You’re quite welcome,” he said.

“Good thing you managed to find them,” Gladio said. I nodded.

“Which way now?” I asked. Noctis led us back to a steep slope that led both upwards and downwards. We began to descend. “Oh, further down. If only we had some canaries.”

I gained a chorus of chuckles and smiled.

 

After what felt like ages of wandering around mineshafts, killing goblins, and skirting by minecarts, our hard work paid off. A blocky room of white stone opened up before us. Ladders led down to the bottom. We took turns carefully climbing down.

“Is that limestone?” I questioned.

“It’s similar to other stone we’ve seen before,” Ignis speculated.

“You think there’s a royal tomb here?” I asked. “Why is there a tomb for _royalty_ in an abandoned mine? And- and- in a _dusty cave_ whose generator wouldn’t even work?”

“I believe the kings were buried there as they were places they added to Lucis’ landscape.”

“Oh. Well. That’s… tedious…”

Noctis whipped around then and backed up.

“We’ve got company,” he said. The samurai guy from the first floor shaft appeared. More goblins accompanied him. Our roles from the first fight returned. As Gladio and Noctis took on the samurai, Ignis, Prompto, and I took out the little gremlins.

Several minutes later, my arms grew tired. I still wasn’t used to using a sword or moving like that. My forearms ached and screamed at me to stop. I lowered my sword when the goblins stopped focusing on me. My clothes were sticking to my skin and sweat dripped down the sides of my face. My chest heaved as I tried to catch my breath.

They just coming. I only managed to get a few seconds break and then another goblin came to claw at me. When it dissipated, a sharp cry pierced the air. Prompto was down.

The other three weren’t doing too well and were busy with the samurai. Noctis tried to get over to him, but was knocked over by the monster’s katana. I raced over to him, and helped him up - without healing him - and we both sprinted to Prompto.

I propped him up against a wall. Bruises and blood had been splattered all over his skin and clothes. Cuts dotted his skin and a few deep gashes painted his side where the cloth was ripped. Noctis told me to stand watch. I stood with them behind me

“Here,” Noct said, handing his best friend a bright orange feather. I heard the sound of revival that came with using potions. “Feel better?”

“Yeah,” Prompto groaned. “Thanks, Noct.”

I noticed that just the samurai was left. Noct helped Prom to stand. I turned to see the latter had been fully healed.

“Everything okay?” I asked. He nodded.

“Thanks,” Prom said. Noctis checked to make sure he was still okay before summoning his full armiger and taking off after the samurai.

“Hey, I forgot part of my speech earlier,” I said, letting myself rest as Prompto fired off several shots. “They’re your friends, right? They shouldn’t care- no, rather… they’ll always support you, no matter who you are or who you choose to be. And if they don’t, they’re not true friends. But these guys-?”

“They are!” Prompto shouted, firing a piercing shot. Noct landed the final blow and the samurai fell. I smiled.

“Yeah, they are.”


	15. Gladius et clipeus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gladio takes Reader’s training regimen up a notch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “The sword and the shield”

“_______, you’re still holding back! Give him all you’ve got!”

A day had gone by after our mining expedition. Noctis had managed to find a royal arm there and was now testing it out. Against me. I didn’t want to hurt him, or myself. But Gladio’s orders were making me nervous. Thankfully Noct was going easy on me.

I thrust forward. Noct parried. He gave me small tips but I was still a beginner. I slashed, he dodged. And vice versa. This had been going for quite some time and my arms were starting to ache. My arms and parts of my legs stung from all the nicks Noct had gotten in.

“Don’t hold back,” he said. “I can take it.”

Well he did take on a god. And the empire. At the same time. Hmm…

I rushed him, slashing diagonally from the bottom left up to the right with all the strength my smaller body could muster. Noctis stumbled.

“Atta girl!” I heard Gladio call. “Keep it up!”

I slashed again from the opposite direction. Noct blocked it and pushed me back. I couldn’t keep my balance and started to fall. Noct caught my hand and pulled me back up.

“Not bad,” he said. “For a beginner.”

I smiled shyly. “I have good teachers.”

“That’s only half of it,” Gladio said. “The rest is all you. I think that’s good for today.”

We had set up camp near the chocobo post. It was situated by a forest called the Nebulawood, where Ignis and I had gone looking for ingredients. In the morning, Noct and I had gone over elemental magic. My aim was steadily improving, but my control needed work. I always ended using too much and had lit several bushes (and one tree) on fire. Using ice was my favorite. It came easier to me than fire or lightning. It’s kind of like the cold and I mixed well together, like a glove and a hand.

As for healing, well, it’d only been a day. But along the whole journey so far, I had been practicing summoning the teal light consciously. I used Noctis’ element training and soon I could control the light energy coming forth from my hand. It didn’t last long, but I could do it now.

I flopped down onto the rock of the Oracle Runes, lying sideways and facing away from the center.

“How did it go?” Ignis asked.

“She’s doing better,” Gladio said. “Starting to put more effort into it.”

“Your yelling scares me,” I told him.

“Good. That’s what it’s supposed to do.”

“I hope it doesn’t frighten you too much,” Ignis prompted. I shrugged and regretted the action. My shoulders burned from all the movement they were unused to.

“If it gets me to improve, I can deal with it,” I said.

“That’s the spirit,” Gladio said.

Minutes went by. The others did various things, like messing around with Prompto’s camera or reading or whatever. I wasn’t really paying attention. Slowly I drifted into sleep.

_The chill of the cold pierced me quickly. I curled up into a ball, holding my knees. It was freezing. I could feel a snowstorm swirling around me, the wind yowling and snowflakes sticking to my skin. Slowly they covered me. My breathing slowed. It was… so cold… And I was so tired…_

_Crunching pulled me from giving in to frostbitten sleep. I pries my eyelids open with sheer force of will. The snow had not yet fully blanketed me. A figure could be seen in the distance. I squinted. They came closer and closer… ever closer until they reached my frozen body which started to shut down and the cold could no longer be felt. Every inch of me had gone numb._

_I managed to gaze up at the shadowy figure. They became a dark blue and bent down. My eyes widened and I tried to shuffle away but I couldn’t feel my arms or my legs. Panic set in. Who was this person? What did they want? Why weren’t they helping me?_

_They reached out a small azure hand. I whimpered. My mouth couldn’t open or at least, I don’t think it could. It was hard to tell. I squirmed as the hand came closer. Then it was on my shoulder._

_And the cold and numbness faded. Feeling returned. I moved my fingers and wiggled my toes. My mouth opened and closed. All in perfect order. I hauled myself into a sitting position. The whirling snow and screaming wind still covered my savior. I stared up at them. No features struck out except for two things protruding from their back. Were those wings?_

_“Are y-you a-an…” I stuttered. “Are you… Are you an angel?”_

_The figure shook their head._

_“It is time to wake up,” they said. Their voice… It sounded familiar._

_“But I’m not asleep,” I said, confused. How did I get here again?_

_“The time has come for you to take your place amongst the peoples of this world. Your gifts and abilities shall prove useful in the days to come. Use them wisely.”_

I jerked awake. The evening sun stared me in the face. I groaned and covered my eyes with my hand. A breeze blew by, chilling the air around me. I shivered slightly.

_“The Blessing of the Glacian goes with you.”_

I sat up and rolled my shoulders. A dull pain came from them. I used one hand to rub at one. A hiss broke the air. It still hurt.

“You okay?” Noctis asked me.

“Did you guys hear that?” I rasped, still sleepy.

“Hear what?” Gladio asked.

“That voice…”

“What voice?” Prompto asked quickly, scared. I stood up. The fifth became occupied. I scratched at my head, blinking.

“Did something happen?” Ignis asked concernedly.

“Uh…” I voiced eloquently. “I had a weird dream. And then when I woke up, some voice whispered… Oh, what did she say…”

“She?” Noctis questioned.

“Yeah, I think it was a girl. Ummm… Something about a glacier? Or… Or was it a blessing… No wait, ‘the blessing of the glacier goes with you.’ Whatever that means.”

“You’ve been blessed by the Glacian?” Ignis said quickly. His hands gripped the arms of the chair.

“Uh, maybe? I don’t know.”

“Tell us what you saw in the dream.”

I told them what happened. There was much more detail in this one than the first. By the time my little story was done, the four guys sitting around me were looking shocked.

“So…” Noctis said after a long period of silence. “You got the Glacian’s blessing before _me?”_

“I… guess?” I answered. “No idea _why,_ though. I’m just… some insignificant human from another world- you don’t think _she_ brought me here, do you?”

Ignis stood. He paced back and forth as he thought.

“Got anything, Specs?” Gladio asked “‘Cause personally, I have no clue what the hell this means.”

“_______, do you recall our conversation the other day?” Ignis asked. I blinked.

“Yyyyyeaaahh, why?” I said slowly.

“I’m starting to believe my second theory to be true.”

I sighed.

“What’s the theory?” Prompto asked.

“It may very well be that the Astrals themselves spirited _______ away for an unknown purpose.”

My gaze fixed on the rock in front of me. I certainly wasn’t smiling. A bitter feeling welled up in me.

“‘S’matter?” Noctis asked.

“It’s just… rude,” I explained. “Inconsiderate. And that’s, like, my biggest pet peeve.”

“Hey,” Gladio said sternly. “They brought you here for a reason. You better own up to it, like Noct.”

“Now, Gladio,” Ignis started. He didn’t get to finish.

“Oh really?” I scoffed. “You want me to comply? With gods I’ve never even heard of who took me _from my home_ and just _plopped_ me on a planet I’ve also never heard of?”

“It’s not like you’ve got any other choice,” Gladio said. I said nothing. My eye twitched. He was right, but that didn’t mean I had to like it.

“Ummm,” Prompto cut in, not liking the sudden tension. “Didn’t the empire kill Shiva?”

“Just how many gods do they plan on getting rid of?” Noctis asked angrily, leaning forward.

“No idea,” I said shortly.

“Most likely all of them,” Ignis said. “They went out of their way to fell the Archaean. And I’m sure the fight with Shiva was no walk in the park… I’m not sure what they’re planning, but it isn’t good.”

“They have to be stopped,” Noctis growled. “First Insomnia, now the Six?”

“Can’t do much without the car,” Gladio said. “I say we start looking for it ourselves.”

“What about the part where _______ has to take her place in our world?” Prompto cut in. “Does that mean she can’t get home?”

I hunched over in my seat. My arms were crossed for support. The ground looked nice.

“_______?”

“You okay?” Gladio asked. I nodded, to exhausted to feel anything too powerful.

“I just…” I sighed. “I’ll just have to get used to it. Come to terms with it.”

“Take all the time you need,” Ignis said softly.

“Yeah, just…” Noctis tried. “Yeah. What Iggy said.”

They let a moment of quiet pass. My thoughts collected themselves and were organized in the “ignore until later” file.

“So we have two people connected with the gods,” Gladio spoke.

“So cool!” Prompto cheered. “My best friends are gonna change the world!”

I smiled at my lap. These guys really were too sweet.

 

“So, uh, why is it just _me?”_

“The other three have enough experience. If you’re going to get better, we’re going to have to find something you’re not afraid to hurt.”

About three days had passed since my dream. In that time, we had gone looking for the car by chocobo and found nothing. Cindy hadn’t heard from anyone either. So Gladiolus decided to up my training regimen.

And it was utter hell.

The first day he was forced to stop due to my body screaming at me for rest. I still wasn’t used to exerting myself in such a way. The second day, he pushed me a bit further, but Ignis cut in. I’d never been more grateful for him. I woke up everyday aching and wishing for death to take me quickly. It never came. The third day was the same as the other two. Then Gladio decided to take me on a personal “walking tour” of the wilderness, aka, we’re going to go find shit to kill so you don’t have to hold back. I still feared hurting my friends.

Magic training was going much, much better. I enjoyed setting things on fire. Many things got struck by lightning. After my dream, my control over ice was the best. It had changed a bit, too. I could frost things over and create snowballs. Just that so far, but the more practice I got in, the more advanced things I could do.

The small lake by the chocobo post proved to be a good spot for all of us. Noctis got to fish, Prompto snapped some great pictures, and Ignis cooked the fish Noct caught. Now Gladio was dragging me around its perimeter. It had rained the day before, so my shoes were getting wet and I feared the same happening to my socks.

“Yeah, but isn’t fighting innocent wildlife a bit cruel?” I asked.

“In the wild, it’s kill or be killed,” Gladio answered. I stared at him in horror.

“Well, gee, thanks, Flowey…”

“Flowey?”

“Only the universe’s most evil flower.”

“Right.”

“It’s from a video game.”

“Anyway, what we’re hunting ain’t innocent. These things’ve been attacking people so we gotta take ‘em out.”

I sighed and begrudgingly followed him. Clouds streaked the sky. Some dark ones hung low in the distance, promising more rain. Hopefully we’d have the car before then. Camping in the rain was my new least favorite thing.

The weird armadillo things grazed nearby. We went around them, crossing into the treeline of the Nebulawood. Growling could be heard in front of us. I assumed it was whatever we were hunting.

“We couldn’t be hunting ghosts instead?” I muttered. “Like the Winchesters? Or demons?”

Gladio hushed me. “They’re close.”

We snuck behind a bush and peered over it. Some odd looking dogs were standing in a pack. Their skin or fur or whatever was stripes yellow and brown. Giant claws protruding from their feet and their snarling snouts didn’t seem any friendlier.

“We have to _fight_ these?” I whispered.

“Shut up and follow my lead.”

Gladio crept around the foliage, sword in hand. He gestured to the enemies and held up three fingers. Did he seriously think he could take out three in one hit or did he mean for me to join when three were gone?

I watched as the pack of what I later learned were Voretooths became prey as Gladio’s wrath descended upon them. I realized if he and Noct could take on the empire while fighting a god, he was probably fine. I really needed to remember how capable these guys actually were.

Three of the Voretooths fell and I summoned my courage and darted out, striking one down. Now that I was putting my life on the line, it did feel much easier to put my training to good use. These things looking hideous helped, too. Better put them out of their misery.

One by one, the remaining seven perished until only one stood. Gladio and I had been at separate ends of the clearing. I turned after pulling my sword the side of one of the beasts. Gladio struck the second to last down. He didn’t notice the one behind him. A crackling could be heard as I used lightning to electrocute it. Gladio spun around to see a half burnt Voretooth lying on the ground.

“Quick thinking,” he said. I smiled weakly. One of them had nicked my calves and another had bitten my arm. I couldn’t heal myself. “Here.”

He handed me a hi-potion. I crushed it and relished the feeling of my energy being replenished as well as the cuts and bite closing up.

“This world does things _right,”_ I said happily.

The walk back to the post got interrupted by a giant frog crushing me. And it would not get up. My glasses were knocked off as I tried to escape. It felt like being flattened by a rubber ball. All its weight pushed onto me. I couldn’t breathe.

“Shit!” Gladio shouted. He swung his greatsword. “Hang on!”

All the air was squeezed out of me. My face was shoved into the dirt. I made the mistake of trying to inhale. The only sound was me attempting and failing to breathe and the glimpses of a sword hitting something. Dark spots began to dot my vision. Small, sharp stones dug into my skin. I tried heaving myself up. A large force shoved me back down. My ears started ringing. My forehead had hit a larger stone.

A dry cough scratched my throat. My lungs were on fire and slowly started to ebb away from feeling. It was like they had disappeared. The edges of my sight darkened until I could no longer see. Or hear. Or feel…

Air filled my lungs as I gasped. The large weight was gone. Gladio hovered over me, worry contorting his face. I noticed I was now lying on my back. I turned over and coughed, small specks of dirt coming out. I spat the rest out, or what little I could. The next few seconds were spent dry heaving.

“Thank the Six you’re alright,” Gladio sighed, helping me sit up. “I almost thought I’d have ro carry you back to the ranch.”

I nodded, not wanting to speak just yet. My throat hurt, my breath tickling it uncomfortably. I managed to sit without support. I’d never been a living pancake before.

“We should get back before something comes.”

I nodded again. I wobbled a lot when I stood. Gladio let me use him as a crutch. I stumbled over roots and rocks. The scratch on my forehead would hopefully be gone soon. Every limb ached and hurt. Feeling slowly returned to my middle.

“Hey, how’d it- Ignis, get out here!” Noctis rushed over to help us as we reached the caravan. Prompto stood behind him, not knowing how to help. Ignis burst from the van, taking one look at me and hurried over after Noct. I was sat down in a chair at one of the tables. Gladio explained what had happened as Ignis assessed me. This time I got to use an elixir. Renewment washed over me. It still hurt to breathe though. Prompto handed me a water bottle. I took a sip, swirled the water around and spat out to the side. The next went down my throat.

“Thanks,” I said, voice hoarse and scratchy. “I swallowed way too much dirt.”

Noct and Prom looked a tad disgusted.

“So the hunt went alright, but you were ambushed on the way back?” Ignis reiterated, wiping me off with a wet cloth. I jerked my head away. He forced me to hold still.

“Yeah,” Gladio said. “Thing’s dead now.”

“Good,” said Noctis. “Or I’d have to go find it myself.”

“There,” Ignis muttered. He drew his hand away. “All better.”

“Thanks again,” I mumbled, drinking more water. The rest of the day I was to stay at the post.

 

The next day, they miraculously let me sleep in. When Noct woke up at the same time, I understood why. The rule was that if one of us was up, so was the other. I yawned and so did he.

“Time is it?” he asked. I shrugged. As he got dressed, I flopped back down. “Hey, come on. It’s almost noon.”

I dragged myself outside.

Gladio went easier on me that day. The attack yesterday and my general sleepiness didn’t make for a good combination. By the time evening cam round, however, I felt much better. I had managed to frost the ground over and it made me happy. All five of us trekked out to a campsite. Noct now let me take almost all the ice magic. We shared the fire and lightning. As the sun began to go down, Ignis announced he, Prom, and Noct were going to search for a few ingredients for the night’s dinner.

“Cool,” Gladio told them. “______ said she wanted to hunt daemons, so I snagged a couple more bounties.”

“I was joking!” I protested. “I didn’t mean _those_ kinds of daemons. I meant the kind that possess people!”

“So soon?” Ignis said sternly.

“I’ll go with them,” Noctis said, walking over to us. “You two be careful, alright?”

Ignis wanted to say something against it, but kept quiet.

“Just be careful,” he said.

Noctis, Gladiolus, and I began our search for daemons in the dark. There were two groups to look for: some lightning orbs and more mini Cthulhus. Some sparking by the lake alerted us to the former. We approached cautiously yet casually. My fingers crackled excitedly, electricity pulsing.

“Ready?” Gladio asked. Noct nodded.

“_______,” he said, “make it a frozen hell on earth.”

“You mean Eos,” I quipped back. My hand froze over. I clenched my fingers into a fist. The small little orb daemons jerked and cried out as the ground beneath them froze over and snowflakes whirled around. Gladio and Noctis lashed out and with the three of us, the monsters were quickly defeated.

“Good work,” Noct said. He looked at me. “Your magic’s gotten a lot better.”

I smiled.

The mini Cthulhus, also known as mindflayers, gave us more trouble. We didn’t bother using magic first this time because they noticed us quickly as we fought off several imps. They dissipated and our attention immediately turned to the hunt at hand.

There were three of them, one for each of us. The only problem was that they began to single Noctis out. Gladio managed to beat one back, and furiously hacked away at its tentacles. I stayed closer to Noct and did my best to back him up. However, the tentacles were too much for me and I fell back. My form began to slouch. Foggy thoughts swirled around in my mind. I felt drowsy. Dammit, the mindflayer was sapping my lifeforce again!

A sword suddenly struck the creature right above my head. Noctis warped with it.

“Are you ready to fucking die?” he roared at the daemon. I stumbled and regained my senses. With a lazy slash I moved out of the way.

“No!” I countered. “I’m a bad bitch. You can’t kill me!”

The two of us dispelled the daemon with a few well placed blows.

Just as we were about to cheer, Noct was snagged by the third. Gladio had been fighting it and the second off. As soon as our prince disappeared into its hold, he ventured to get it off. The second wouldn’t let him. It tugged and tugged at him, most likely believing I wasn’t much of a threat.

“You get Noct!” he ordered. “I’ll take care of this one.”

“Okay,” I said to myself. I steadied my sword arm. “Okay. I can do this. Okay.”

I rushed the mindflayer. My arms worked carefully to free my friend. A tentacle lashed out. I chopped it off. How? I don’t know. The moment was a blur. I slashed at the other tentacles. They retreated. I aimed for the head. But I was too small to reach. The cut landed on its middle. Noct came tumbling out, hacking up the gas it tried injecting him with. I drove my sword up through the opening. The mindflayer faltered and evaporated into the night.

I shook some residue goop off my hand.

“Hey, Noct, want some ectoplasm?” I asked, holding it out to him. He crawled backward.

“Fuck no,” he said grossly. He stood, wiping his hands on his pants. “But thanks, for saving me.”

“Toldja she’d do better out in the field,” Gladio praised, slapping an arm around me. “Twenty four more years and she’ll give me a run for my money.”

“The sword and the shield,” Noct joked. “I like it.”

I laughed. We all did.


	16. Propositum nostrum clarus existit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The quintet finally makes a breakthrough!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “Our objective becomes clear”

A week passed by. My training continued. I no longer ached as much. Snowflakes covered every surface I could find. My blessing from Shiva proved to be fun. My friends, however, started to find it a bit annoying.

It didn’t help that we had to wait for the tables to thaw before eating.

“Alright, no more freezing the table tops,” Noctis said one morning. I sulked guiltily. An hour later and he got hit in the head with a snowball. I couldn’t act innocent. I was the only one who could do that. Our sparring that day ended quickly and with me flat on my back.

Another day he woke me up when he and Prompto went to go take pictures. I helped Ignis make breakfast that morning. I made it snow over Noct’s head for half an hour in retaliation. I couldn’t manage any it for any longer.

Then, after the week had passed with no sign of the car, I woke up to see Noctis, Prompto, and Gladiolus were nowhere in sight.

“Did they die?” I asked sleepily. Ignis was reading by the campfire. I had spent more time around him in the past few days. He was becoming a good friend.

“If only,” he joked back. “They bet on whose chocobo was fastest. I decided not to partake.”

“Probably a safe bet.”

Some time passed in comfortable silence. I gazed up at the cloud ridden sky. Rain would come soon. I could smell it. And feel it, since I had been reduced to a drowsy mess.

“You were talking in your sleep last night,” Ignis said. My eyebrows furrowed.

“That’s… weird,” I voiced. “That’s not something I usually do.”

“I know, which is why I thought perhaps you need someone to talk to.”

“...What was I saying…?”

“Well… Nonsense, at first. Something about a pirate and not having enough gold for the captain. But then you started panicking, twisting in your blanket. Noct managed to calm you down. So I was wondering if maybe there was something on your mind.”

I thought for a moment. Nothing new had me worried. Just the usual fear of not getting home and wondering what would happen in the future. But… Actually, something else _had_ been on my mind.

“I… I guess I just…” I swallowed. “If I _do_ get home, I’m just wondering what will happen to you guys. I’ll miss you.”

Ignis seemed a bit surprised. He recovered swiftly and gave me a warm smile.

“That’s good to hear, in some way,” he said. “We’ll miss you, as well. And I’m sure in time, we’ll learn what is to come. But I’m sure we’ll be fine. Just a bit heartbroken is all, but glad you’ll be somewhere safe, and back home.”

A high pitched, choked sound came from my throat. My body tilted to the right. He was so sweet. By the gods, he was _so sweet._

“You’re making this really hard on me,” I rasped. He just laughed.

When the guys got back, they packed up the camping stuff and we headed to the caravan after seeing a forecast for rain. Someone decided to turn on the radio situated on the table nearby. A man with an English accent was talking about blockades being put into place to catch the people who were responsible for the attack on the Crown City. That was bullshit, but it wasn’t like we could do anything about it. Then he addressed the earthquakes caused by Titan.

“I can’t believe it,” Prompto said. “Shouldn’t the car have turned up by now?”

“Yeah…” I agreed.

“We should wait until Cindy’s done asking around the local garages before we despair,” Ignis said. I thought it was odd that so much time passed and yet she still hadn’t finished.

“Let’s not fool ourselves,” Gladio said. “The empire has it.”

“Then maybe we could ask Ardyn to help us out again, right?” Prompto suggested hopefully. I raised a brow.

“Really?” I asked.

“The imperial chancellor,” Gladio said sarcastically.

“He represents a problem,” Ignis countered, “not a solution.”

“So where does that leave us?” Prom asked.

“Stranded, awaiting word from Hammerhead.”

_Still no actual sharks…_

“In the meantime,” Gladio said, “we’ll have to hoof it.”

Prompto suddenly brightened.

“Look!” he said. “It’s Umbra!”

When Noct tried to talk to the dog, he ran away, expecting us to follow.

“Someone’s sending us a message,” Ignis said.

We chased after Umbra for a minute. He led us to a clump of trees not far from the chocobo post. Noct stopped for a second and gasped slightly.

“Gentiana…” he said. We all followed his gaze. A woman with straight black hair and closed eyes stood some feet away. I found her black and white dress to be rather strange for the setting. She held herself regally, and began to speak.

“Hear me, O King of the Stone,” she said gently. My eyes narrowed. “By the Stormsender’s blessing with the path to the Stone be opened. The Oracle goes hence in her King’s name.”

“That voice…” I whispered to myself.

_It sounds familiar._

“Luna-!” Noctis started. “Where is she now?”

“The eye of the Storm,” Gentiana answered. “When the covenant is forged, the Oracle and ring shall await their King at the Walls of Water. Stray not from the path.”

Noctis sighed, looking down for a moment. Gentiana opened her eyes and met my scrutinizing stare. She smiled and nodded before disappearing into thin air.

“She’s a messenger,” Ignis explained. “A spirit, faithful to the Oracle.”

“Her voice sounded familiar,” I said.

“I’m not surprised. It was probably she who you’ve heard in your dreams.”

I thought silently as Noct tended to the notebook Umbra carried. He started moving not long after. We followed.

_Why did that messenger nod at me? Is she really the one delivering the dreams? Maybe I’ll get a chance to talk to her._

“Lady Lunafreya has done well to keep the ring from falling into enemy hands,” Ignis said, startling me from my thoughts. Prompto mentioned Altissia next, to which Ignis replied that all we needed was a ship. A place Caem might serve us well.

“The hidden harbor.” Gladio answered the question forming on my lips. “Just might work. I’ll ask Iris to set it up.”

“I guess being a noble has its perks,” I said quietly.

“You know it.”

On the way to… wherever we were going, the rain began its fall. I pulled my hood up, wishing I could shield Sleipnir as well. Poor thing had to just deal with it herself. I muttered praise to her and she chirped.

It turns out we were going to a sort of ravine. A shimmering green, petrified tree lied at the end. The air around it was charged with electricity. I could feel the energy from the tree as Noctis reached out. His eyes turned purple, power bursting forth from the bark. I registered what had happened. Then I noticed someone speaking.

_“Foreign hordes fear the True King’s ascension.”_

_True King? Is that Noctis?_

_“The fearful seek to seal the path of what must come.”_

“What is it?” Prompto asked Noct. “Another headache?”

“I heard her,” the prince answered. “Gentiana.”

“Is it weird that I heard her too?” I asked.

“Almost,” Ignis said, “but because we know of your connection to the gods, not much surprises me anymore.”

“Maybe she wants to make sure you know your place in all this,” Noctis speculated. “Like your Glacian dream said.”

“But… Okay.” I sighed, defeated.

_But why let me hear messages meant for Noctis? Unless there’s more to come…_

There were more to come. We came upon the next location and Gentiana’s voice made itself known to me and Noct once again.

_“The covenant is forged but the revelation awaits. Make now for the Stormsender and let judgment be passed.”_

_Oh… So I’m going to be judged by a god. Good to know, I guess. Fun times._

The final tree rested in a cave called Fociaugh Hollow. Prompto wasn’t keen on going in. We had to anyway. It had been revealed to us specifically.

“I can’t quite make out how deep it runs,” Ignis observed. The hollow was dark and wet from the rain. Ramuh really didn’t mess around when it came to covenants and judgment. The endless downpour showed no sign of stopping. At least we had shelter now.

At the end of the cave, the wall split in two. Noctis said there should be enough room to squeeze through. I loathed the feeling of getting stuck between the walls of stone, but I made myself do it anyway.

“Oh this reminds me of Fat Man’s Squeeze at Rock City,” I groaned. My body frantically worked to pull me through. I sighed in relief when I got out.

Then Prompto got kidnapped. His yelling caused us to rush back to an opening in the rock. There was no sign of him.

“Are you okay?!” Gladio called.

“No I’m NOT okay! This place is _literally_ the worst! And why did it have to be a _snake?”_

I couldn’t help but giggle a bit at the image of a small snake taking Prompto.

We ran through the cave to find him. The snake had dropped him halfway. We continued warily until a large opening caused us to halt.

“Perfect place for a boss battle,” I muttered. A giant snake with a woman’s head dropped down from us.

“Have you… seen my… baby..?” she asked in a creaky, croaking voice.

_Nope. Fuck that. Let’s all board the Nope Train to Fuckthatville._

She attacked. I let the boys do most of the work. It wasn’t that I was too lazy, but I really didn’t like the look of this thing. She was clearly a daemon, and a sentient one at that. I am not about either of those.

“______, get in here!” Gladio shouted. I shook my head behind a rock and said no. “Why the hell not?”

“There comes a time when you just can’t!” I called back. “You gotta draw a line somewhere! You gotta draw a fuckin’ line in the sand, dude. You gotta look inside yourself and say, ‘what am I willing to put up with today?’ NOT FUCKIN’ THIS.”

Without any kind of warning, a gas filled the area they were fighting in. When it cleared, four little frogs hopped around helplessly.

 _“What the fuck?”_ I whisper-shouted. I stepped out from my rock. “All right, that’s it, bitch. _No one_ hurts my friends. You want your baby? _Come get her.”_

Wrong thing to say. I barely managed to parry her dive. I slashed and she dodged. She bit and grazed my arm. I hissed. I stabbed forward and nicked her. She coiled around me. I tried desperately to wriggle out. No avail. She squeezed tightly. The wind was knocked out of me. Then someone sliced her tail. She roared and tossed me aside. I hit the very rock that had once helped me. My head started spinning. I hauled myself up and slipped back onto my face. My glasses lied to my left. I retrieved them. The vision of the cave floor swam. I hadn’t taken notice of my hearing being gone until my ears were greeted with the noise of the naga’s demise.

Ignis sprinted to my side instantly. He helped me up. I leaned against the rock. One potion made standing seemed like a better option.

“Protective much?” Noct teased.

“Hey, you basically did the same for me,” I said. Maybe I should stop being so damn reckless. Then I wouldn’t get hurt as often.

_But you’re finally able to give back! Not well, but you can! You can help them finally! Just like they do for you!_

That made me happy. I’d endure the pain if it meant no one else getting hurt.

A small path led to the inner chamber. The shimmering bark leapt out immediately to greet us. Lightning struck the tree as Noct touched it. It ruptured in bright magenta sparks. That was it.

“This is it,” Noct said, “the power of the storm.”

“Eh, I expected more fire and brimstone,” Prompto said. I thought the same.

“Some gods are friendlier than others, I guess,” Gladio thought.

“But not all of ‘em,” Noctis said. “Poor Luna…”

“Perhaps you had better console her in person,” Ignis suggested. I nodded.

“I bet she’d love to see you,” I told Noct. 

The rain stopped. The sky was bright blue with small white clouds here and there. Overhead, a large triangular ship flew. The guys confirmed it as the empire’s. Noctis’ phone rang.

“Yeah,” he answered. Silence. “Yeah? ...Ugh…… Don’t worry about it. We’ll figure it out. ...Yeah, thanks for the heads up. Later.”

He hung up.

“Who was that?” Gladio asked.

“Cindy.”

_Finally. Thank God._

“What?” Prom exclaimed. “You can’t talk to her that way.”

“Yeah, I can,” Noct said. “I just did.”

Cindy had confirmed our suspicion of the Regalia being in the empire’s clutches. I simmered silently. They had cost us a lot of time. Noctis said that we should retrieve her now. And then a sharp pain shot through my skull.

_“The Oracle awaits not only the True King. The Healer Mage shall learn her fate at the end of the Walls of Water. May she be filled with the strength to continue. The King will need her kinship on his journey.”_

The pain faded. I stared at Noctis.

“Did you hear that?” I asked. He nodded slightly.

“Yeah” he answered.

“What did you hear?” Ignis asked. I swallowed.

“The Oracle is waiting for me, too,” I relayed, “and Noctis will need me on his journey.”

“Guess we gotta act quick,” Gladio said. Noctis summoned the chocobos.


	17. Well, Well, Well, If It Isn’t The Dawning Realization That I Fucked Up Real Bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mission: Retrieve the Regalia is a go.

The ride to the imperial base took a lot longer than any of us had anticipated. Several times, small troops would stop us and attack. I lost count of how many there were. Our potion and elixir supply started to wane. A nasty cut on Gladio caught my attention. One touch and he was healed. And then I started coughing.

The hacks of air shot up through my throat. They scratched at the sensitive skin. I covered my mouth with my hand. When it pulled back, just liquid slicked my palm. Specks of… something lied here and there. I wiped my hand off on my jeans.

“You okay?” Gladio asked. I nodded.

“Hope I’m not getting sick,” I teased, half serious. I hadn’t taken into consideration diseases in this world. I had no immunity to anything that differed from Earth. Should I fall ill, there was only so much the guys could do.

The fortress the Regalia rested at looked absolutely massive. By the time we reached it, night was falling. Its silhouette caused us to double back. Ignis explained that the walls were from an older fort of which the empire was now making use. Noctis led us to a camp not too far away. We’d stay the night, devise a plan for infiltration, and execute it the following evening.

After dinner, we plotted. Or rather, Ignis did.

“So, any bright ideas, Ignis?” Noctis asked. He, Gladio, Prompto, and I sat around the campfire. Iggy stood, pacing a bit.

“A dark one, as it were,” he answered. “A frontal assault would leave us exposed. But, if we moved under cover of night, we might be able to infiltrate the base unnoticed.”

“And until then?”

“We learn all we can about the base’s design and attempt to narrow down the Regalia’s location. I’ll analyze what intelligence we have available to find us a way in.”

“Sounds good, Specs.”

“Alright!” Prompto cheered. “We’re gonna get our wheels back!”

As per usual, I stayed up later than the others. The stars twinkled daintily at me. Instead of the typical feeling of contentment, it almost felt like they were mocking me. I frowned and lowered my gaze to the fire in front of me. When I decided to head to bed, I’d put it out.

_It’s about damn time, I told myself. Your skills are improving. You can give back! You can help!_

_But is it a good idea? What if I get hurt?_

_Who cares-?_

_They will._

_But you’ll be useful. Think of all they’ve done for you._

I had fallen from the sky. Right when I thought I’d die, I was caught by four guys who were quick to adopt me into their close knit group. They had been incredibly sweet and understanding. They had offered to help me figure out what was going on.

Then they had lost their home. I knew how they felt. Thoughts of leaving them to get out of the way had pricked me from the get-go, but once I realized they needed emotional support, I couldn’t just abandon them. We had common ground, as heartbreaking as said ground was. Even if they couldn’t get me home, I could at least help them take back theirs. Try as I might, I just wasn’t up to standard then. I couldn’t fight, I couldn’t devise plans very well without knowing the world I had fallen into, and I sure as hell didn’t even know what to do. But I could heal them. I could give back just a sliver of the kindness they’d shown me.

_You’re getting emotional again._

That’s what happens when I go without my medicine for too long. I feel like crying more, and it’s easier to break down. The millionth lump formed in my throat. I wanted to help them. I wanted to help my friends as much as they’d helped me. And I would stop at nothing to make sure they knew how grateful I was, how grateful I’d always be.

I raised a hand to my eyes, wiping away little drops of water from the corners. I wouldn’t let myself cry again. I couldn’t.

 _I’m so tired of_ crying. _Why can’t I get mad? Why am I not angry for once? Why am I always sad and despondent instead of determined and out for blood?_

_Because you know violence isn’t the answer. Has Undertale taught you nothing?_

_You have no determination to speak of. All you have is Perseverance…_

_And Kindness._

“Dammit,” I whispered, voice cracking. “Why can’t I be filled with determination for once instead of depression…?”

The tent rustled. I ignored it. Maybe Noctis would come out again. Our little late night talks had been a source of comfort these past couple weeks. I heard the footsteps and waited. My form slouched in my seat. It’d be no surprise if it looked a tad pathetic.

“_______?” a soft English accent filled the void we call silence. “It’s late and we have a long day tomorrow.”

“Oh,” I breathed, devoid of emotion. “Hey. Thought you were Noctis.”

“So that’s where he gets to each night.” Ignis sat down next to me. “I remembered you wanted to tell me something. Then I noticed you weren’t in bed.”

“The stars are mocking me. They think it’s funny that I’m… I don’t know, but they don’t like me anymore.”

I wasn’t looking at him, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out he probably looked concerned.

“I’ll be honest,” he said, pushing his glasses up, “but I have no idea how to respond to that.”

“Yeah, same,” I laughed. “I’m just spiralling, is all. I’ll be fine. Maybe. Eventually.”

“How are you faring without your medication?”

“Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically?”

“In general, if you don’t mind.”

“Uh, well… Hmm… As of late, okay, I guess? You guys are good at distracting me. But when it’s just me, I don’t really feel… anything. Just kind of… empty.”

“I can’t say I’ve been depressed before, but the descriptions I’ve read would say that’s normal for your… affliction.”

I made a split second decision and dabbed. “Nothing in life matters!”

Silence. My arms started hurting so I put them down and leaned back.

“Or maybe that’s just nihilism. But yeah…”

“A fair assumption, but now you have me concerned.”

“Well… I mean, it would seem that’s a common thing among our generation, even worlds over.”

“I suppose so.”

“But really, I just want to know why I’m here.”

Ignis sat deep in thought. His eyes narrowed. Several moments dragged by. The fire died down. Then Iggy stood and started pacing again.

“I feel…” he muttered, “as if we have been given several clues as to your purpose here. But none of them make logical sense, which tends to worry me.”

“Well what is it?”

“First, your shared powers with Noctis. Its mysticism is surprising, but should you two be more closely linked than I had originally thought, perhaps it will eventually have some merit. Then there’s the dreams. You’ve heard Gentiana’s voice in them, so she must be speaking to you. But _why?_ Why would the gods-?”

He halted and spun to face me. “You’ve been reading the Cosmogony, yes?”

I nodded.

“Then you know of the Glacian’s fondness for mankind. And, should you be from a world that also houses humans-”

“-then she might really be the one who brought me here? But _why?_ Why _me?_ I- I… I’m n-nothing- I’m nothing special. I never had these powers before, so she gave them to me, right? But _why?”_

“I wish I could tell you… But only the Oracle could give us the true answer.”

I sighed, defeated.

_Then we have to get there as quickly as possible. To Altissia, that is._

The tent rustled again.

“What the hell are you two doing out so late?” Noct’s voice growled sleepily.

“Speculating,” Ignis and I chorused. Noctis sighed.

“Well, hurry it up, alright? We got a lot to do tomorrow.”

The next morning, we all slept in. We’d be up late, so getting as much sleep as we could was necessary. Lunch passed by in silence. Then our reconnaissance commenced.

Ignis and I, being the most silent of our quintet, would sneak around the base to look for weak points and get a general picture of what we were up against. I might not be the best at improv, but should we be spotted, I’d have to do the talking. Ignis was known as Noct’s ally, so he was more easily recognizable.

Meanwhile, the remaining three would head to nearby towns and gather information from the people there. We mounted our chocobos with that plan in mind.

“Alright, Team Four-Eyes is a go!”

“Shut up, Gladio,” I called. Sleipnir and Minerva took off towards the base. When we got near the entrance, Ignis veered left and I went right.

Sleipnir kept to the shade of the treeline. I observed the tops of the base walls. No one could be seen roaming or patrolling. My phone, freshly charged, zoomed in further. Nothing. I spurred Sleip into action to move forward. She crept along the forest edge. Not even one mecha suit came walking through the small stretch of grass between us and the base.

_They must all be near the front. Do they really think no one will come and try to attack from the rear? Or is that what they want us to do…?_

There was no telling what the empire had in mind. If Ardyn really wanted to help us, then why take the car? That had only served to hinder us so far. His actions didn’t make sense to me, or to anyone.

When I reached the back of the fortress, Ignis came riding along not long after. We fled into the forest and ran the long way around to camp.

“I hope you weren’t waiting long,” he said.

“I had just gotten there,” I told him, shaking my head. He nodded and proceeded to tell me of an area around the left we could take that led to the inside. “Is it me, or does this seem too easy?”

“Let’s not make assumptions just yet. The majority of their soldiers are inside. They will most likely give us a worse time there.”

Noctis and the other two returned a few hours later. We had a late dinner and waited a few hours more. Night fell. Midnight passed. We’d let them continue for a while. Once it reached a late hour, we headed out on foot. Noctis practically sprinted. I was near huffing point when we came to the base. We hid behind some mobile warehouse containers. The mission began.

“Our goal is the Regalia. The last thing we want is to engage an entire garrison. Avoid detection at all costs.”

“In and out before it gets light, then,” Gladio said. I raised an eyebrow.

“And how exactly do you expect to get a _car_ out of there unnoticed?” I asked.

“By avoiding detection, duh,” Prompto teased. I rolled my eyes.

“We could disguise ourselves?”

“Nah, too much work,” Noct whispered.

“But a good backup should this fail,” Ignis confirmed.

“You’d have to do it, though,” Gladio told me playfully. “Flirt with ‘em, get ‘em to let you slip right in.”

I simmered silently.

“Even if it means leaving the task unfinished,” Ignis instructed, “we should withdraw before we overstay our welcome.”

Slowly we came to the area by the road. A few armored soldiers patrolled in front. On Ignis’ count, Noctis warped and killed a few, clearing the way for the rest of us. I made a mental note to tell him how cool it was later. Then I noticed the two _giant_ tanks sitting there. I whimpered slightly. Why did I agree to this again?

_Give back!_

Right.

Noctis led us to the entrance. It had been left unguarded. A large spotlight roamed the open area, however. Ignis stopped Noct before he walked right into it. They crept to the space behind a tarped load. A rather convenient path helped us keep to the shadows. We all hid as some Magitek armor passed by our spots. Then we snuck behind the large boxes of supplies. Shivers plagued me every other step. I hadn’t realized how frightening this would be. Maybe the guys would let me opt out.

No. I had to keep going. What if something happened and they needed me?

Shaking fearfully, I followed closely behind Noctis. He warp-killed more soldiers. Soon the area was clear of creepy guards. We slinked into the floodlights. The Magitek armor searched back and forth. We got its pattern down and hurried to a gate made of red lasers.

“This is least safest thing I’ve ever done,” my shaky whisper broke the silence. “Please tell me we don’t have to do this again.”

My hands trembled and my eyes were wide. My jumpiness had raised significantly. A sound nearby startled me.

“Scared?” Gladio asked as Noct disabled the gate.

“Petrified,” I whispered back, nodding.

“Just stay close and you should be fine,” Ignis said. My heart hadn’t been able to stop fluttering. Messing with the military had never been a goal of mine.

Gladiolus spotted some sort of generator in the distance. It most likely powered the MTs. Destroying it would make our lives easier. But the Regalia came first. Noctis made a few more warp-kills. We continued sneaking around in the dark until-

“Oh thank God,” I sighed. The sight of a car had never given me such relief. An invisible weight was lifted off my chest.

“There’s the old girl,” Noct said. We all ran towards it.

“She’s a real sight for sore eyes,” Prompto praised.

“And none the worse for her time in imperial hands,” Ignis said. I smiled in happy satisfaction. Finally, after ages of waiting and spending more time in the wilderness than I’d like, the Regalia had been found. No more long journeys on foot. I’d miss Sleipnir, but my legs had grown saddle sore. I couldn’t wait to relax in an actual car again.

And then that satisfaction was instantly destroyed by a giant mecha suit attack.

“Change of plans,” Ignis said. “Our new objective is to clear a path for the Regalia.”

“You seriously didn’t have a plan for that before?!” I exclaimed as I summoned my sword.

“More fighting, less bitching,” Gladio called, heading for the Magitek armor.

“Don’t make me come over there, Gladiolus Amicitia!”

As the guys took a more melee approach to taking it down, I used my lightning magic to strike down anything getting close to them. Running back and forth between sides of the base proved exhausting, but I really didn’t feel like getting hit with bullets.

Then I got an idea. Maybe I could freeze the MTs? I looked up at the watchtowers. Several soldiers stood unharmed. Noctis was too busy with the giant machine blocking our way.

“Don’t get blown up!” I shouted, sprinting for the tower. “If you get killed, I’ll kill you again!”

A chorus of “can do” and “no promises” met my ears. I ascended the steps. The first MT turned to attack. I raised my hand. A blast of frost and snow immediately iced him over. With a golf-like swing my dad would’ve been proud of, the soldier shattered into little icy pieces.

_It’s just a robot. It’s not a person. It’s just a robot. It’s not a person._

The thought that I was killing actual people started weighing on my conscience. But they were just robots. That’s what Ignis had said. ...Right?

My legs and lungs were screaming in pain as I kept going. Another soldier ended up as Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes. And then the one at the top got a chest full of sword. I shoved him over the railing. I received a thumbs-up from Noctis that I could barely see. The next minute I used as a breather. Then I made my way back down.

As I reached the nearly dead mecha suit, Ignis told Noctis to destroy the generator we had seen earlier. There was a chance it could weaken the MTs.

“No more stealth?” the prince questioned.

“Our cover’s been blown,” Iggy said. “Go to town.”

“______, come on.”

Noctis and I made our way to the generator. A few soldiers blocked our way. We took them out fairly easily. I froze them solid, Noct warped and shattered them like mirrors.

Right as we reached the generator, another Magitek armor suit came out. More soldiers appeared. We groaned.

“This thing is serious business,” Noct said. I nodded, trembling slightly now that it was just the two of us. “You focus on destroying that thing. Electrocute it or something. I’ll take these guys out.”

“Right.”

I ran around the few traffic barrel things as Noctis went straight for the enemy. My sword struck down an MT before assessing the generator.

_There's a chance it’ll absorb any electricity I throw at it._

A bullet narrowly missed my head. I jumped and moved toward the power source.

_When in doubt, set it on fire! This one’s for you, Pippi._

A large blast of heat lit the space around me. The generator was set ablaze. And then the fire died out.

“Oh _come_ on!” I shouted in frustration. “Fine, then. Let’s cool it down a bit.”

The force of a snowstorm filled the air with coldness. The generator froze over. I smiled triumphantly. The fight continued on around me. I began hacking away at the ice. Hopefully I was doing _some_ damage.

“Could go for an Ebony right about now,” I heard Ignis quip.

“Save the coffee for later,” Noctis growled. I wobbled back as the hits I landed backfired, sending tremors through my weapon.

“Something to look forward to.”

Small sparkles began to lift from the ground. The air around us lit up, a magenta haze coming with it. Then the sky went dark and a massive hand reached out-

-and snatched Noctis from the ground.

I followed the hand. A giant, wizened old man hovered the landscape. He pulled Noct to him, lifting his staff. I recognized him from the pictures in the Cosmogony. That was Ramuh.

With power equal to his title of god, the base was struck with the largest lightning bolt anyone had ever seen. It didn’t hurt me or the other three. The MTs and mecha armor perished amongst the wrath of the gods. The light from Ramuh’s judgment caused me to shield my eyes. When I looked up, Noctis was back on the ground.

The remaining electric energy crawled along the ground… and into my body. My hair frazzled and stuck up straight before going back to its usual state. I shivered uncontrollably before the energy faded.

_Guess I’ve got Ramuh’s approval. And power._

“Thanks, Thor wannabe,” I muttered. “Seriously. I mean it.”

“That. Was. Hardcore!” Prompto exclaimed. “You both got the blessing!”

“And it did the trick,” Ignis agreed. “The place is dead.”

“Rest in pieces,” Gladio said. “C’mon. Let’s grab the Regalia and split.”

We ran back to the car.

“This is the weirdest day we’ve had and that’s saying something,” I mumbled when we finally reached it.

“I’ll say,” Gladio said. I was nearest the Regalia. Ignis was behind me. Prompto lagged behind. Right as I reached for the door handle, he pointed out something behind us.

A man with white hair and dressed in the same color slowly approached us. His left arm had been replaced with dark metal. He carried an intricate sword in his other hand.

_Who is that…?_

His presence had me on alert. He was dangerous. I could feel it. I quivered next to Ignis.

“Long has it been, Noctis,” the man drawled.

_Wait, isn’t that the voice from the radio the other day? What was that guy’s name?_

“Ravus,” Noctis voiced.

_Right. The high commander._

“You receive the Storm’s blessing,” Ravus said, pace quickening. Ignis and Prompto shoved me between them. Ravus raised his sword to Noct’s face. I inhaled a sharp breath. “And yet you know nothing of the consequences.”

“Watch it,” Gladio warned, coming forward to protect Noctis. The point of Ravus’ sword transferred to him. Ignis stepped forward. I did the same but backward.

_Coward._

_Can you really blame me?! This guy is terrifying!_

“Be still,” Ravus said flatly. His gaze met mine. “All of you.”

His eyes narrowed at the sight of a random girl amongst the entourage of the King of the Lucis.

“Not good…” Prompto trailed.

“Heir to a crown befitting no other,” Ravus continued, coiling the fingers of his metal arm.

_Bucky Barnes???_

_Not. Now._

“Witness his splendor and glory. All hail the chosen king.”

Ravus clearly resented Noctis for something. His mocking words irked both me and Gladio. Well, we were the most obvious. I didn’t care who this guy was or how scary he looked. I wasn’t going to let him just attack Noctis like that, not after all he and his friends had done for me. My own hands clenched into fists. My eyebrows furrowed angrily. I sent Ravus my best death glare. My body still trembled.

“Awful high and mighty for an imperial rat,” Noctis retaliated, “serving the enemy to hunt down Luna.”

His words provoked Ravus further. His eyes held back a fury like none I had seen yet. His metal prosthetic grasped Noct by the throat.

“I do not _serve,”_ he said, shoving my friend back. “I command!”

I gasped. Gladio rushed ahead to shield the others. He faced Ravus bravely.

“The king’s sworn shield.”

“You better believe it,” Gladio growled confidently. Ignis pushed me to side, out of harm’s way. At the time, it seemed wise.

“A weak shield protects naught.”

Ravus circled his sword around. He swiftly brought it down. This time I stepped forward as Gladio summoned his greatsword and struggled under the commander’s strength.

_What the hell? Gladio’s the strongest guy I know!_

We all tensed, the air tight and suffocating. Then Prompto rushed to get out of the way as Ravus thrust Gladiolus back with one push. The car shook under his force. Breath left me. I paused, devastated.

_Do something!_

_Give back!_

_Protect them!_

_You can’t do anything else!_

_...Or are you too useless and weak to care? To do anything?_

“NO!” I shrieked, at both myself, and Ravus. Without any other thought I propelled myself in front if Noctis, summoning my own meager weapon.

“______, what the hell are you doing?” Noctis angrily snarled. I ignored him.

“If you wanna get to Noctis, you’ll have to go through me, too.” I took the most protective stance Gladio had taught me. Coincidentally, I had learned it earlier that day- er, yesterday. Ravus stared at me, saying nothing. “I don’t know who the hell you are or what problems you have with him, but he’s one of the nicest people I’ve ever met. And I’m an innocent person. You really want to kill an innocent person just to make a point?”

My actions had apparently shocked everyone. Noct could hardly do anything without angering Ravus and if the others lifted a hand, they could fail as easily as Gladio. But I was unknown to the enemy. At the moment, I was the only effective thing in his way.

“...Should the Chosen fall, that, too, is fate,” Ravus spoke slowly. I tightened my grip on my sword, ready to fight if I must. My hands felt cold. They were freezing. I drew myself up. Ice slowly crept up the hilt. “Or would he put the soul of a child before him…?”

_Child?!_

I growled and prepared to launch myself at him.

“Wait, _____,” Noct said. “Don’t-!”

The sound of something shattering greeted my right ear.

“I’d say that’s far enough,” a familiar voice warned. I turned to see Ardyn walking towards us. He had a hat this time.

“Ardyn...” I breathed. My sword disappeared into little sparks.

_Oddly perfect timing…_

“A hand, Highness?” he asked.

“Not from you,” Noct growled.

“Oh, but I’m here to help,” Ardyn offered.

“And how is that?” Ignis asked warily. Ravus rotated to face away from us all.

“By taking the army away.”

“You expect us to just believe that?” Gladio asked.

“When next we meet, it’ll be across the seas. Just so happens we have business of our own with the tutelary deity. Don’t we?”

Ardyn stepped closer to Noct, lifting an arm and waving it slightly. Ravus reluctantly and irritatedly followed his order, leaving the scene.

“Fare thee well, Your Majesty. And safe travels.”

We all watched as he stalked away.

Pause. Something fell nearby.

…

…

…

The guys immediately surrounded me. They were also pissed. I could feel the tension radiating from them. It caused me to cower inwardly. I pulled my jacket further around me.

“What the hell were you thinking?” Noctis roared, doing his best to hold back his volume. It didn’t work well. “Do you _want_ to die?”

“I-I was just-”

“Are you insane?” Gladio added, not helping in the volume department. “Not even _I_ could take him and you just put yourself between us!”

My throat felt dry. Tears welled up.

“I just wanted-”

“Of all the things you could’ve done,” Ignis began, crossing his arms, _“this_ was the _worst._ I agree with Noctis when I say, were you _trying_ to get yourself killed?”

A tear fell. “Please, I just-”

“Please don’t do that again!” Prompto’s plea caused the already formed lump to block my airway.

“I just- I- I just- wanted- to help!” I choked. “He knew the rest of you. He didn’t- he didn’t- he did- I’m unfamil- unfamili- I…”

I gasped, trying desperately to fill my lungs with air.

“You could’ve gotten yourself seriously hurt!” Ignis furthered. “Do you have any idea how serious this is? How dangerous that man is?”

I collapsed under their worried and furious glares. I brought my hands up to cover my face as the tears were released.

“I- I-” I inhaled deeply. _“I’m sorry!”_

The sight of my distress seemed to dispel their anger. The tension left their bodies, but none of them came forth to comfort me. I wept as silently as I could. No one said anything. They just watched as I broke down _again._ This time because of them.

“I…” Noct finally said. “I didn’t mean to be so loud, I just…”

He sighed, not knowing what to say. I fought down hyperventilation, not wanting to have another panic attack. That would make the second within two weeks.

“We were just…” Even Ignis was at a loss for words. “You had us worried sick and completely in shock.”

“Yeah,” Prompto broke in. “Usually it’s us protecting _you._ We just didn’t want you to get hurt.”

A sob was all I could manage to respond. They stood awkwardly, not knowing how to deal with this. I shook uncontrollably, trying to shove these feelings down. But nothing could calm me.

At last, someone pulled me into a strong embrace. Then someone joined them. Then another, and another.

“I’m sorry…” I whispered. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, we know,” Gladio muttered. “We get it. You saw something bad happening, and you had to take action. But you’re like our sister, y’know? We can’t just let you do something like that.”

My cries only worsened. I shivered and cowered against them. Their declaration just served to make me feel worse. But… what would have happened if I hadn’t stepped in? Would Ravus have hurt Noctis before Ardyn got there? There was no way of knowing.

But I had stopped him. I wouldn’t feel bad for that. I had managed to throw him off, even if it was only for a second. I had given back. It wasn’t much, to me, at least, but it was a start. I had _helped._

But at the cost of their trust.


	18. Propter meae audaciae, retro retineor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader faces the consequences of her actions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “Because of my recklessness, I am held back.”  
> Alternate Title: “Therapist Ignis”

The first half hour in the Regalia was spent mostly in silence. My tears kept falling, physical emotions on my face. I knew I was in the wrong, and I kept apologizing for acting so recklessly. But I wouldn’t apologize for helping.

Ignis told me and Prompto that Ravus was Lady Lunafreya’s _brother._ That would explain why he was so pissed at Noctis. And I had just put myself in the middle of their dispute. Whoops. But I hoped he could understand I wanted to protect my own brothers as much as he did with his sister.

An hour in, the tears had dried. I had managed to avoid a panic attack. That made me feel a bit better. However, sitting between Gladio and Noctis, the most protective of the bunch, didn’t help to sooth my already extremely low self esteem.

_Look at you. Can hardly even help yourself and you think you can help them?_

_They probably hate you. If they didn’t before, they certainly do now._

_Weak._

_Helpless._

_Pathetic._

_Please just stop,_ I whined at my thoughts. _You’re not helping._

_Who cares if we’re not helping? Maybe you should’ve done the same._

My head hung, chin meeting my chest. My hair fell around me like a curtain. Gladio was reading and Noctis was admiring the landscape. I kept my head down, too scared to speak.

_They’re not going to let you do anything now._

_I know. Shut up._

“So, uh,” Prompto cut the silence with a sharp blade, “where we going?”

“Thommels Glade,” Ignis answered. “_______ let me borrow her history book, and several royal arms locations are recorded in it.”

That got everyone’s attentions. I vaguely remembered reading about a few of them. There was one near some old Solheim ruins called Costlemark Tower. Maybe we’d get to go there.

“Thommels Glade it is,” Noct said. “Anywhere else?”

“The glade is near the Rock of Ravatogh,” Ignis explained. “So we might as well have a look while Lady Iris secures the hidden port in Caem.”

That settled everyone’s curiosity. Ravatogh was a volcano, if I remembered correctly, or some sort of mountain. It’s where Ifrit the Infernian was defeated during the War of the Astrals. I looked forward to seeing real lava in person.

We stopped for lunch along the way. The Crow’s Nest gave me memories from the beginning of my journey. I wished to God that I wouldn’t break down in this one. Gladio and Noctis sat in one side of the a booth, Prompto and I took the other. Ignis dragged a chair over to sit at the end.

They chattered about nothing while we waited to be served and then while we waited for the food. I ordered quietly and didn’t say anything again. It was normal for me to not say much, but I hardly paid attention now. Instead I focused on shoving my emotions down. When the food arrived, I ate slowly.

“You okay?” Prompto prodded me with his elbow. I looked up to see the other three gazing at me. “You haven’t said… anything.”

I nodded, eyes downcast. I felt empty. I probably _looked_ empty. All motivation had disappeared. I just wanted to curl up in a ball and sleep.

“We, uh,” Noctis started, “we didn’t mean… we didn’t mean to be so harsh on you.”

I shook my head. “Don’t. It’s not your fault. I’ll be fine.”

The four guys exchanged glances with each other.

“Are you _sure_ you’re alright?” Ignis asked. I nodded again. No eye contact. I refused to look at any of them. When I didn’t say anything, he whispered to Noctis, “She’s starting to withdraw. We need to act fast.”

“So, uh, is there anything you wanted to do?” the prince asked awkwardly. This time I gave him a confused glance. “Like, we’ve only been going places the four of us want to go. Is there something you wanted to see?”

I thought for a moment. Was there anything I wanted to do? Not really. I didn’t really feel up to doing anything. I didn’t want to move. I could hardly eat.

“Not that I can think of,” I told him dully.

“Well, ah, just tell us if you do, okay?”

I nodded.

The Thommels Glade royal tomb was fairly easy to find. We happened upon it in the middle of our search. It stood cleanly in the wild, white stone partially blinding me for a second. I trailed behind the other four, entering last. I took my usual spot to Noctis’ left, Ignis behind and between us.

Noctis reached out to the shield lying on the marble coffin. It turned a transparent blue and swooshed into its new bearer. The rest of the glaives came out and circled Noct. I stood still for a moment, unable to care.

“______?” Ignis got my attention. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

“No,” I said simply. I missed his extremely concerned stare. “Come on, let’s go.

We followed the others back to the car. I started to feel a bit irritated. I had been in the company of four people for weeks. There had been hardly any alone time in those weeks and it took a toll on me. I squished my arms into my sides, not wanting to touch anyone.

There was a caravan at a stop along the way to Ravatogh. Noctis decided to park the car there and go the rest of the way by chocobo and/or foot. He paid for a night with the idea of crashing there later in mind.

“So, uh, we’re heading up the mountain,” Noct said to me as I sat at one of the tables out front. “And- Well…”

“You want me to stay here?” I finished with a sigh. “Okay. I don’t mind. I don’t like the heat anyway.”

“You sure we should be leaving her here alone?” Gladio asked Noctis. The latter shrugged.

“I don’t see any better option,” he said.

“What if she hurts herself? Or does something crazy?”

“I’m protective, not suicidal,” I protested.

“Still, with your mental state the way it is, you shouldn’t be alone. We don’t know how long we’ll be.”

I slumped in my seat.

“Um, maybe she’ll be okay,” Prompto suggested. “I mean, she’s been fine before.”

“Yes, but Gladio has a good point,” Ignis said. “Her mental health isn’t what it used to be. ...Why don’t I stay with her? I trust you three will be fine on your own?”

“You sure?” Noctis asked, skeptical. “I thought you’d want to come.”

“I do, if only to make sure you come out in one piece. But I can’t ignore this any longer. She needs _help,_ Noct.”

“I mean it, I’ll be fine!” I said. “I’ve done it before, I can do it again. Please don’t let me hold you back… It’ll just make it worse.”

I don’t usually use the guilt trip card like that, but my anxiety took over for a moment. It made _me_ feel guilty just for using it.

“And that’s exactly why I need to stay,” Ignis said.

“You’re not holding us back,” Noct said. “We’ve been moving forward pretty good for a while now.”

“Yeah,” Gladio agreed, “if anything, we’ve been moving too fast for _you.”_

“You’re really good at adapting,” Prom said positively. I nodded. Then I slouched more in defeat. There was no winning with these guys. Not in something like this.

“Just be careful,” Ignis told them as they set out. “If you can’t make it back before nightfall, find somewhere to take shelter.”

“Got it,” Gladio said. “We’ll be just fine.”

Noctis was the last to mount his chocobo, giving me and Ignis one last glance. We watched as they rode away toward the mountain in the distance. I sighed for the millionth time, feeling awkward now that it was just me and Ignis. After a moment had passed, he sat down in the chair opposite me.

“I just… wanted to help,” I explained, bringing up my hands and then helplessly flopping them back down. “I’m sorry…”

“I know you are,” Iggy said gently, “but this hasn’t happened before, and it’s worrying us all.”

“I don’t mean to add to your list of troubles.”

“And we appreciate that, we do, but I’m wondering if perhaps you’d like to talk about it instead of… well…”

He tried to think of something to say that wouldn’t make me feel worse. I decided to take up his offer on talking because not doing so would only cause further tension. Reluctant words came forth.

“It’s just,” I said, “when I first came here, I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t fight, I couldn’t help with… anything, really. And… you guys are… so _nice_ and _friendly_ and _patient._ You’re some of- no, you’re probably _the kindest_ people I’ve ever met. I’m not usually the fast friends type of person, but you all made me feel welcome and- and as stable as I could be. There’s only so much I can do, and I’m so- grateful- and- and…”

I paused to breathe, shoving the welling emotions down as best I could.

“And when he - Ravus - just totaled- almost totaled the Regalia with Gladio, I panicked. I hardly even remember moving. I just thought I had to do something, that I had to give back somehow, and then my bad thoughts just flew by and I snapped and… shouting ‘no’ at him was- it wasn’t just directed at him, y’know? Gladio said you guys think of me as a sister. But it’s a two way street. I alway tend to think of my friends as family. And I love my family. And no one’s ever messed with my friends like that before, so… Yeah…”

Ignis kept quiet for a moment. My eyes were glued to the table edge. A warm breeze blew through the sandy air. I wondered how the other were doing. An hour or two would bring the darkness. They’d probably have to stay the night on the mountain.

“You…” Ignis pushed his glasses up. “You remind me of myself, in a way.”

I allowed my eyes to glance over to me. His own were gazing wistfully at the table.

“I swore an oath to protect Noct, and I shan’t break it. He means too much to me, to all of us. We’ve been friends since we were small.”

I tried to think of a younger Ignis and failed.

“So I understand how you feel. Especially in your situation, and I’d imagine how lost and alone you first felt. How you might still feel. I suppose none of us took into consideration a deeper approach to those around you. It’s not just the weight and false guilt of believing yourself a burden on us, after everything that’s happened, and I’ll reiterate that you’re _not._ It’s also a strong sense of loyalty and gratitude for not only assisting you in your time of need, but for being your friend, as well.”

I nodded fiercely. He was incredibly perceptive and that saved me a lot of time and explanations.

“It hurts me that…” I swallowed. “That… you lost your home around the same time I did. And I feel the least I can do is help you reclaim it, even if I can’t get home - to my own home, I mean. It’s… weird. I tend to feel things either very deeply or not at all.”

“I see. And we couldn’t be more thankful to have you with us, _______. But throwing yourself in front of Ravus was not the most adequate way of demonstrating it.”

“Yeah, I know. And I’m sorry, I really am. But as soon as I found myself in that place, I realized he didn’t know me. He knows the rest of you. There was a chance I managed to stall him before something awful happened. Would Ardyn’ve got there in time?”

“A fair point, but Ravus isn’t exactly known for his mercy. Please, next time, let us handle it, alright?”

“Yeah. Okay. And… Thank you. I don’t think you realize how much it means to me.”

He smiled. “It’s never a problem.”

The rest of the evening was spent quietly making a small dinner and having little talks in between bouts of comfortable silence. The feeling of renewment that came with hanging out with another introvert refreshed me in a way I hadn’t realized I needed. There wasn’t any obligation to speak or the straining and distressed feeling my chest got when trying to keep up with four guys. My heart wasn’t tight with general nervousness for once. My hands weren’t shaking and my body felt loose. I was… relaxed.

I fell asleep easily that night, with no spare tension to keep me awake.

When the guys returned the next day, I was feeling a lot better. Ignis’ motherly nature had been soothing. We spent most of the night talking. Nothing specific, but it was nice. I feared I had destroyed my relationship with him and the others with my reckless actions. For once, I was wrong.

They got back before I woke up. Ignis disclosed the previous day’s discussion (with my permission, of course). It opened their eyes a little. Prompto woke me up and smothered me with a hug.

“What…” I groaned. I had actually slept really well, having been in an actual bed this time. Two arms were tightly wrapped around me and I had no idea who it was.

“I’m just so happy you feel the way we do,” Prompto’s voice cracking in my ear caused me to flinch. “I think we were all worried you felt like you owed us and nothing more.”

“What? Of course not! You think I’d do something like that just because of a debt? You’re my friends and I’m not about to let you die.”

“That’s good to hear,” Noctis said behind Prom. “Ignis said you’re doing better.”

I nodded once my body was free, and smiled.

“Talking always helps,” I said bashfully, averting my eyes. A slight heat burned my cheeks. “Oh! And I thought of someplace to go if that’s still an option.”

“Sure. Where?”

Costlemark Tower took a while to get to. It was on the other end of the map, so I began to feel guilty again for holding them up. The ride was nice, though. Bright green trees and fields that shined in the morning light. Random wildlife I still wasn’t used to seeing popped up every now and then. My heart sank with disappointment at not being to go “cows!” and have everyone stare out the window for a second as we passed them by. There were some weird horse things: big, gray and white, with horns that spiraled out from their heads. It was like a unicorn, horse, and giraffe in one. They crossed the road in front of us.

We stopped for lunch about a third of the way there. After that I spent the next hour of the trip researching Costlemark and learning more about Solheim. The tower itself was very intricate. Layers upon layers of unseen architecture lied beneath the earth, waiting to be explored. Not many had gotten far inside due the place being overrun with daemons. I kept my fingers crossed that we’d get to see more of it.

Around mid afternoon, we happened upon a royal tomb not too far away. Happy we’d managed to find another, we hurried inside.

Noctis unlocked the crypt and we all filed in. Light from the outside flooded the white marble room. The usual sculpture of a lady near the back remained. But there was one problem.

“Where is it?” Noct said, eyes searching around frantically.

The royal arm was missing. Shards of black stone had been scattered over the ground, like someone had broken in. On the coffin, behind the head of the carved king, was note.

“‘Greatsword remains unaccounted for,’” I read aloud, “‘likely taken to Costlemark by daemons. Investigation continues. Hunter HQ.’ Huh. Good thing we were going there anyway.”

“A stroke of luck,” Ignis said. Gladio patted me on the back.

“Good thing we’ve got this one with us,” he said.

“Let’s go,” Noctis said. We piled into the Regalia and drove off to Costlemark.

The tower could be seen in the distance from where we parked. It loomed over the small grove of trees surrounding it, casting an ancient shadow. I got _Lord of the Rings_ vibes from all the old ruins around Lucis. It was like some sort of AU where Aragorn and Frodo had merged to create Noctis in a modern world. I shook that thought away.

All our stalling from lunch and the detour to the Fallgrove tomb had night coming sooner than expected. It was only a few hours till dusk. Wanting to find the greatsword and then shelter took first priority. As we traipsed through the forest and grass, we passed a campsite.

“Should we set up before looking?” Gladio asked. We stopped right beside it. As they debated, I gathered more ice element power. The surge of magic flowing through my veins gave me a chilly rush. A pleasant but cold shiver ran up my spine. I shuddered happily.

“It would be good to come back to,” Ignis said. I glanced back over at them. “We could get the tent up while you three scout out the tower.”

I eagerly led Prompto and Noctis to the left of the Oracle Runes. Carved stones lied here and there, the writing similar to… oh what was it called?

_Not the Assyrians, but… Or was it the Assyrians? Shit, I can’t remember. Not hieroglyphics, that’s Egyptian. This one was from the Middle East…_

“Oh gross!” Prompto yelped. I tore my gaze from the old rock and turned to see giant centipedes blocking the entrance to the tower area. Bad shivers sprinted across my body and I stepped back.

“Uh, can we go around?” I asked, still shaking.

_Ew ew ew please god no not today_

“Let’s just get this over with,” Noctis sighed. “Or Gladio won’t let us hear the end of it.”

I hated every minute of fighting overgrown bugs with way too many legs. I was on the receiving end of many of their attacks. Disgust had overpowered me and I flinched back every time one came near me. The squelching of each blow made me cringe. Soon they were dead. I stalked around the wall they guarded to get away.

“Nope nope nope nope nope,” I repeated as I stomped toward the ruins. “Nope nope nope.”

That was worse than the naga woman.

A burst of excitement shot through me. We neared the tower. Adrenaline rushed through me and I took off. Stairs led up to the platformed foundation. I sprinted up them, ecstatic to be seeing ancient ruins in person. Worries forgotten for a moment, I vibrated in place silently when I reached the entrance.

“It’s beautiful!” I gushed, eyes shining. The tower was massive, stretching up to the sky. A few rooms surrounded the main shaft. We decided to search those first. “It looks like the Colosseum in Italy! Look at those arches! They’re stacked just the same!”

“You… really like history,” Prompto observed. I nodded enthusiastically.

“Look at those carvings!” I bounded over to a thin strip carved into the wall. “It looks like circuits. Oh! And those columns! I’ve never seen anything like it before! How are they still standing?”

Noctis and Prompto followed me leisurely as I bounced from one area to the next. All the rooms were empty and most lacked ceilings. I examined the odd brickwork and the etchings in the stone. Then I swiftly made my way back to the actual tower. A small bridge led to a wall. More columns lined the sides. The bridge itself suspended us over… nothing.

“It just keeps going down, down, down,” Prompto echoed.

“But how far does it go?” I asked no one in particular.

“Where’s the entrance?” Noctis asked. “It just leads to a blank wall.”

“It opens at night. One of your kings led an expedition to reclaim it. Unfortunately a daemon killed him.”

“Why do you know more about our history than we do?” Prompto asked.

“Because I read, that’s why.”

I gasped suddenly.

“What?” “Where?” my friends panicked.

_“Look at those pediments!”_

Ignis and Gladio found Noct and Prom sitting against the bridge railing half an hour later. I had managed to find a space to slip through to get closer to the Colosseum-like arches. The sun settled low in the sky. Since there was no way to get inside, we had nothing to do.

“These columns looks nothing like the ones we have back home,” I spouted as Ignis led me away from the edge of the tall foundation. “No ionic or doric or Corinthian. It’s so… square. Look how they carved it. It goes in and out and in and out…”

“We get it,” Gladio teased. “You like ancient history and architecture.”

“It’s a whole other level of Classicism! Those arches are semi circle arches and they look so pretty! The stacked ones help support the weight. Though, there really isn’t anything to support so I guess it’s just for show. But still!”

Ignis smiled, amused.

“And the frieze! Is it a frieze? I don’t know, but the top level that the columns support: it looks so simple but intricate. Ooh, is that dental molding?”

They couldn’t stop me. No one could.

 _“How_ do you know all this?” Noctis asked finally, throwing his arms out in exasperation.

“I took an architecture class the semester before I came here. Good thing, too. This is _fantastic!”_

In the end, they had to pry me away from the tower to eat dinner. I pouted for a bit throughout the evening. Then we got to go back.

“Oh wow,” I breathed, mouth open in awe at the lit stone. The same writing on the stones was written on the columns. It glowed orange, lighting a path to down the bridge to a large opening in the wall. Darkness gaped at us now, intimidating and causing the air to run cold.

“Maaaaybe we should do this again tomorrow,” Prompto suggested. “I mean, we just climbed Ravatogh. And I don’t want to be here when those bugs come back.”

“There’s no telling how far it goes,” Ignis added.

“Then we’ll take a look around,” Noctis decided. “If we can’t find anything, we’ll just… come back and try again tomorrow.”

“Gives us time to prepare for a longer expedition.”

We headed into the tower. A long hall lined with columns greeted us. The space spread out to to the sides. A slope led down into the structure, stretching endlessly. None of us could see where it went.

“Ha!” Prompto shouted. “Knew there’d be a way in.”

“No red carpet,” Gladio said, “but a stone staircase is the next best thing.”

“What’s keeping the lights lit?” I asked. The steps were embedded with small blue lights in the middle. It gave our descent a pleasant yet mysterious atmosphere.

“No idea,” Noct answered.

One of the steps held a circular metal port of some kind. We crossed over it and it began to glow red. I gave it a wary glance but kept going. At the end of the staircase was another arch with beautiful, flowing decorations over it.

“Ooh, that’s more like a Roman arch,” I gasped, “I think. And look how beautiful the image carving is!”

“_______,” Noctis warned, “if I hear one more comment about stone carvings…”

“You’ll what?”

“I’ll lock you in here, king’s orders.”

The floor leveled out into a short hallway. I noticed the dark stone stripe running through the walls. The doorway at the end caught my attention.

“Look at the squares,” I commented. “It’s so weird. The Greeks used the Golden Rectang-”

“________, I swear to-!”

A loud growl in the next room interrupted Noctis’ outburst. We crept in to see more Grimer impersonators. They were even purple. These ones were lil gelatins that got no love from anyone. They perished within minutes.

More monsters attacked in the next open space we found. The ancient hallways held nothing but barrel vaults and more building techniques no one recognized. As we came to a spiral slope leading further down, larger monsters nearly decimated us.

“Noct?” Ignis asked. I pressed a finger to Prompto and began coughing. He was healed, but the pain made its way into my body. My throat hurt like hell. It felt like someone had scratched it from the inside. Small specks sputtered onto my hand.

“Yeah?”

_Is that…? No, it can’t be. It can’t be. It just can’t. I should be fine._

I ignored the warning sign.

“We’re running low again on curatives,” Ignis said. “It would be wise to stock up before continuing.”

“Right. Let’s head back up, then.”

We made our back to the entrance. I tried soothing my throat my rubbing it gently. I swallowed as smoothly as I could to get some liquid to the area. Breathing hurt just a tad.

Right as we came upon the second half of the ascending staircase, Gladio’s large frame stepped onto the metal port we had activated earlier. Noct turned back when I started coughing again. He stopped, sensing something was wrong. We each placed one foot each onto the pad.

And instantly warped back to the circular room at the bottom. Ignis, Gladio, and Prompto vanished before our eyes. When it registered in our minds, we panicked and dashed back up the staircase.

Racing onto the leveled platform, we hurled toward the doorway. Not realized what had happened, Noctis and I ran straight into the wall separating us from the outside.

“Ignis?!” Noctis shouted. “Prompto? Gladio!”

Muffled sounds came from the other side. Neither of us could make out what they were saying. Noct pounded his fist against the wall, grunting in pain and desperation. I stopped after a few seconds. This was going to get us nowhere.

“What happened?” Noctis blurted. “What do we do?”

“Nothing, I guess,” I said bluntly. “That metal tile thing must’ve trapped us in here. There’s no telling how to get out.”

He started panting, his body shaking furiously. His hand trembled. I slid down the wall, sitting on the floor and sighed.

“They can’t just,” Noct paused. “They can’t just lock us in here.”

I rested my hands in my lap. “We’ll just have to wait. I’m sure there’s a way out.”

Noct collapsed next to me, head in his hands. I placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t worry, Noct. There’s always a way.”


	19. Rēx et medice sunt frater et soror

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noctis and Reader make their way through Costlemark Tower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “The king and the healer are brother and sister.”
> 
> This chapter is 100% Noctis and Reader~!

“Y’know, when I said I’d lock you in here, I didn’t really mean it.”

“A bit late for that, _Your Majesty.”_

“Hey!”

Time had has passed. How much? We didn’t know. Noctis and I were still stuck inside Costlemark Tower. Our phones weren’t getting any signal. There was no way to contact anyone outside. So now we were just sitting and waiting.

I rested my chin in my hand. “I didn’t know this place was basically an Egyptian tomb.”

“A what?”

“The pyramids in Egypt? They’re supposedly chock full of traps and curses to keep grave robbers out.”

“Oh. Yeah, not a bad comparison.”

_I keep forgetting their knowledge is not the same as my knowledge._

“What are we supposed to do?” Noct asked the air. “This place only opens at night. We’ll have wait almost a full twenty-four hours.”

“We could explore?” I suggested, voice rising awkwardly in pitch.

“In a cave full of daemons?”

“You got anything better?”

“Staying here and waiting for the guys to figure something out?”

“Yeah, but what if we find a way to open it ourselves? Maybe there’s a mechanism or something to disable the trap. I mean, _someone_ had to come down here, right?”

“You know you can just say you want to see the rest of the ruins, right?”

I crossed my arms and turned away, huffing.

“Alright, fine. Let’s go. We’ve got nothing better to do.”

We made our way back down the staircase. The metal warp pad no longer glowed red. Or at all. Not even when we stepped on it. So we continued down until we reached the first spiral slope. It was a slow walk down and at the bottom were more daemons.

A giant purple ball of electric energy with a face caused the most damage. It’d explode after laughing at us and Noct had to take it down first. A few potions had us ready to go again and we took down the squishy gelatin things. I shook their sludge off me, shuddering.

“Ick,” I spat. “Hey Noct, want some more ectoplasm?”

“Absolutely not.”

We shared some fire magic and turned to a caved in opening behind us. Something had dug into the ground, providing us room to keep going. Noct crawled under first, and I went second. He was already fighting off gremlins with wings. I narrowly dodged their clawed swipes. Panting now, we came to a fork in the hall.

“So, left or right?” I asked. To the right was an empty room, most likely home to more monsters. Left was more hallway.

“This way.” Noctis turned left. Blue-glowing sconces dimly illuminated the corridor. As we walked, I continued to admire the architecture and how much care and detail that went into it. “Come on, hurry up.”

“Sorry!”

A stairwell rested in the next room. Rubble filled most of the space. Dust tickled my nose. Our movements caused it to stir and float up and around. Noct sneezed. We carefully stepped over the broken chips of wall and ceiling, fought more daemons, and took a quick breather on the stairs.

“You think the arm’s really down here?” I asked as we sat.

“I dunno,” Noct answered, shrugging. “I hope so, or else this would’ve mostly been a waste of time.”

I stretched my legs out. “Ignis’ll probably be peeved we didn’t stay put.”

“Ha, yeah. Guess we gotta be extra careful. There’s only two of us.”

A moment of silence settled. The only sound was the occasional fall of a rock somewhere. The smell of dust and old rock filled the air. This place was generally cool since most of it was underground.

I looked up at the ceiling. The square patterns the Solheim people used extended there, as well. The sophisticated circuit pattern trimmed it, making it look like a fantasy-sci-fi hybrid. My legs crossed and I leaned back. Resting was nice. The tension straining my limbs slowly ebbed away. Soon I was looser and more comfortable.

Noctis didn’t move. I glanced at him a few times. No emotion made itself present on him so I didn’t know what he was thinking. Was he alright? Should I ask? Maybe I should. He scratched his head. My gaze shifted away.

“Are you really alright?” His voice sounded odd against the pure silence in the room. It was loud and echoed slightly through the corridor in front of us.

“...What do you mean?” I asked, tilting my head.

“It’s… I mean, you put yourself in front of Ravus. And I know that was a couple days ago, but…”

He remained quiet for a moment. I let him think.

“It’s just… You nearly gave me a heart attack. After seeing what he did to Gladio… There’s a chance you wouldn’t have survived a real fight with him.”

My lap became an object of interest. I fiddled with my jacket zipper, a bit downcast.

“Yeah, I’m alright,” I muttered after a minute. “Like I told Ignis, it happened so fast I didn’t really give myself a chance to protest. You’re my friends, and… well, you’re the only friends I have right now. And I care about you. I get attached really quickly, I know. I don’t mean to. But… I was scared you’d get hurt. I just couldn’t let that happen.”

He sighed. “Yeah, I know what you mean. Just… You know you don’t have to take full responsibility for us, right? I know you’re grateful, and that’s nice to hear. But… You don’t owe us anything. You’re our friend, too.”

And that’s how friendship works, he meant. I could hear it in his tone. Noctis didn’t seem to be the best with expressing his emotions. I could tell he was really trying. A smile came upon my lips.

“Yeah, I know,” I said. “It’s a nice thought. I’m really glad for it.”

“It’s… weird,” he sighed. “We haven’t known you that long, but…”

He paused again. The faint tugging in my chest began again. Something clattered nearby and faded.

“It feels like… I’ve known you forever, I guess.”

He said it so nonchalantly, like it didn’t really mean anything. But that was the cue for knowing it was actually the opposite. My smile returned and grew wider.

“Same,” I laughed, giving my words the same treatment. A comfortable stillness went by. Neither of us spoke. For just a little bit, we had a sense of peace.

“We should probably keep moving,” Noct said finally. He stood and helped me up.

At the bottom of the stairs was a series of small rooms. In the second we met more daemons. They were tougher and harder to beat than the fake Grimers. I got knocked onto my back a few times. Potions were running low. Once those ran out, elixirs would have to be used sparingly. The bruises from this place would stick with us for a while.

Costlemark Tower went on _forever._ It was an endless array of staircases, hallways, and collapsed architecture filled with daemons. Noctis barely escaped mostly unscathed each time (I got hurt the most). After every few fights or so, we’d take a rest for a bit and then keep going. The wall carvings were starting to get boring and repetitive. Yeah, they looked cool, but I had been staring at them for hours. Just when we thought perhaps there was no end in sight, the last spiral slope opened up into a very large room with the same tiles as the staircases used.

“Woah,” I breathed, gazing up. The ceiling was dark and invisible, it was so high up. Noct led me around the area. Several square tiles lied in each corner. Some had large stacks of bricks next to them. “What do we do from here?”

“I think these weird squares have some sort of purpose,” Noct said. “Maybe they open?”

We took turns walking around on the platforms. Noctis had the genius idea to stand on one. When it began descending, I almost jumped off.

What followed was the most excruciating puzzle in my life.

We had to _move_ the cubes we stood on. And not just that, we had to decide _where to move them._ Then monsters attacked us every other space. Sometimes Noct would push the block left instead of right and we’d have to go back around. My eye twitched when the same thing repeated after completing the first. And then the second. And the the third.

After each individual puzzle was solved, the ground opened up and dropped us through to a large room held up by columns. Red giants and imps and all manner of daemons attacked us and we only just managed to defeat them in one piece. Then we had to head up and do it all again. Several times we argued.

“I thought you said left!”

“We already did that one!”

“No we didn’t! It went right instead of forward.”

“But the _last_ one did the _same thing.”_

“No it didn’t!”

“Yes it did!”

“No it _didn’t!”_

_“Yes it did.”_

Then…

“I don’t think this is going to work.”

“Shh… I’m thinking.”

“Seriously, Noctis, it couldn’t be left three times in a row. How do you even know where we’re going? Everything looks the same!”

“Just… hold on a sec.”

“We’ve been at this for hours. Can we _please_ take a break?”

“Will you shut up for a second and let me figure this out?”

“Fine. I’ll be over there watching and judging every move you make.”

Finally, _finally,_ we made it to the fourth. Well, not yet. But we reached the end of the third cube puzzle. Trial and error never fails. My hair was sticking out all over at this point. Our clothes were torn and slightly singed. Everything hurt and ached and weighed me down like an anchor. After the last mini fight, we dropped down into the boss battle.

There were two red giants this time. Noctis had to use his armiger to take them out while I tended to the smaller monsters. His glaives gleamed and flashed beautifully as they took down daemon after daemon. I was stuck getting cornered every other imp.

My own sword wasn’t balanced very well. At least, not for someone of my size. While I had been doing well in training, Gladio had suggested that we should probably find something better suited for me. That being said, my cuts and slashes tended to be a bit sloppy no matter how hard I tried. Teetering forward a bit too much, I thrust at the daemon in front of me. It lashed out with razor sharp claws. I slashed at it. The blade of the sword shifted a little too far to the right. I missed.

I quickly found myself lying on my back with three deep gashes starting from my side to the left half of my middle. The pain was unbearable, so bad I could hardly feel anything but the absence of flesh and something leaking from it. Noctis let out a short roar and the daemon was gone with one hit.

“Noct…” I wheezed. My head felt light, spinning slightly. There were two Noctises hovering over me.

“Stay calm, okay,” they said. They both held out an elixir. “Here.”

They crushed it and the pain faded slowly as the wounds closed. I closed my eyes as Noct helped me lie back. Wheezy breaths filled an otherwise quiet atmosphere. Could he hear the heart racing inside me? I swallowed.

“There’s… a chance it might scar,” he said. “A wound that bad. I’m sorry I wasn’t paying more close attention.”

“‘S’not your fault,” I slurred, trying to stay awake. “Ignis ‘n’ Gladio are gonna- gonna kick your ass, though.”

Trying to see again, only a sliver of vision returned. My eyelids wouldn’t cooperate. Sitting up ended as failure. Noctis helped me move into a more comfortable position as he leaned against the wall. His body supported mine as I slouched against him. Forgetting where we were, I slipped into dreamland.

 

When I woke up, we were back in the starting room. My head was lying on one of Noctis’ crossed legs. His eyes were closed and his breathing was steady. He must be out, too. Then I noticed some soft fabric covering me. Somehow he had retrieved my blanket from his inventory. I thought it was back at the campsite, but there it was. Slowly sitting up, I maneuvered both Noct and I so the blanket covered us both.

Some time later, the prince awoke to find warmth cloaking him and a weight on his shoulder. My head rested there, his own against mine. I straightened up as he stirred.

“Hey,” he said sleepily.

“Hello,” I yawned. “Hope we weren’t out too long.”

“Yeah. Come on, we’ve got one more left.”

At the end of the fourth puzzle was another room. It was smaller and held a metal platform in the middle surrounded by stone railing. Short obelisks circled the railing. I snapped a quick picture, like I done with the rest of the tower.

A little dome rested in the middle of the platform. Lines lit up white as Noct touched it. We both stood still as the pad brought us smoothly down into a large control room. It was a metal dome with wire-looking accents. Our platform slid through a red and glass shoot and ended in the middle of the room.

A giant lizard roared as we stepped back. Insect-like wings protruded from its back. The long snout was lined with pointed teeth. The tail looked strong and heavy. I made a mental note to stay clear of it.

“Is that a dragon?!” I shouted as Noctis went straight for it. I warily kept back.

“I think it’s a jabberwock!”

“Oh _joyous_ day, callooh callay!”

“It’s ‘frabjous’!”

“Whatever, I was being sarcastic.”

Noctis got the beast distracted. My sword found its side and slashed furiously. I noticed jagged horns poking out from its head. Noctis swerved around and went for a wing.

The jabberwock was rather slow. It could move swiftly in bursts but otherwise stayed in one place. I got out of the way when Noct told me to, narrowly avoiding the beast’s petrifying attacks. The sides of it ended up scratched and partially flayed from my own. Noctis did the most damage, summoning his armiger once more and going all out.

In the far reaches of the circular room, I spotted a dash of gray. It was quick, but when I looked again, it remained. A long greatsword with a choppy edge lied amongst stone from a royal tomb. I made sure Noct was okay before making a break for it.

I sprinted toward the weapon. It stayed still as the dragon rushed us for time. Panting heavily, the sword got nearer… and nearer…

_One step, two step. Almost there..._

_**Whoompf!!** _

A heavy weight slammed into me. The jabberwock launched my body from the ground into the wall on the opposite side of the room. The wind burst from me as I hit the metal casing. My body collapsed and tumbled down to the floor.

Ringing. That was the only sound to be heard. Its shrill tune rattled my brain. The floor shook beneath me, physically and visibly. The scene before me swam, blurring together the colors of red and black and gold as my mind tried to collect itself together. My skull pulsed incessantly with pain. I couldn’t move. When I tried to get up, I fell back again.

Blue flashes met the corner of my eye. Noctis had summoned his armiger again and struck the beast down blow after blow after blow. With one final jerk of his hand, every royal weapon he had collected thus far filleted the jabberwock with a righteous vengeance that exploded in a bright burst of blue and white crystalline power. The beast had been smote.

As my hearing returned, I heard Noctis say, “That’s for my sister, you son of a bitch.”

He stuck a sword into the corpse and rushed to my aid.

“Hey, you okay?” He helped me as I struggled to stand.

“I think so,” I rasped, nodding weakly. “Could use a vacation, but I won’t ask too much.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll be back soon.”

He lifted a hand to the royal broadsword which floated up across the room and dove into him. Then he assisted me in looking around for something to help us get out. A flashing light caught his eye and we limped over to it.

“Uh, what does ‘hostibus’ mean?” he read. My thoughts sifted through my conjugations and declensions for a minute. Remembering Latin in this state was difficult.

“Uh…”

_Hostis, hostis… hoste? No that’s ablative. Hostem… Hostis, hostis, hostī… Hostēs, hostum… Hostibus…_

“For enemies.”

Noctis pressed the button. The light stopped flashing and went out.

“Guess that did the trick,” he muttered. “Come on.”

Supporting me, he led us back to the platform in the middle. Something shiny caught my eye.

“Hey, wait,” I choked out. “What’s that?”

A gorgeous sword peeked out from behind one of the panels. Noct deposited me on the elevator and retrieved it. The hilt was elegant. The pattern woven into the metal reminded me of Vikings and the Nordic countries. It ended in a slight point, the handle made of black leather. The blade was a nice length, extending out a good few feet or so as I held it. Its weight felt nice in my hand. It balanced perfectly.

“I like it,” I admired softly. Sparkling, childlike eyes met Noct’s. “Can I keep it?”

He chuckled. “Sure, why not.”

With a smile, I touched the orb on the elevator to take us back up.

“Thanks, _brother.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOTE:  
> Since this is my magnum opus for FFXV, I _**will**_ be including Dissidia, no question. It’ll begin next chapter. If you’re not familiar with Dissidia, I highly recommend looking into it. It’s a fun game~
> 
> Comments are much appreciated! Don’t be shy~!


	20. You’ve Got To Be Fucking Kidding Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A strange occurrence interrupts the journey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty here’s the thing:  
> I don’t think I’m actually qualified to write Dissidia but because I have no self control, I’m going to anyway. I just got into the whole franchise and I’ve only played XV, Dissidia NT, and Dissidia Opera Omnia. That being said, I have no idea how well I’ll be able to write the characters from other games, but I will do my damn best.  
> Also I hope you guys like XII 😏

The cool night air kissed our lungs as we emerged from Costlemark Tower. Star twinkling a hello. A breeze blew past. Both Noctis and I were glad to be out.

The guys had disappeared. We supposed they went back to the camp so they could try and look for us in the morning. Noct helped support me and my wheezing coughs slowly down the stairs and through the grass. It took a while, but we finally made it back to camp.

Prompto spotted us first. His shout alerted the other two and soon three figures were sprinting across the small field. Prom made the misjudged mistake of hugging me first. I cried out as every bruise and cut and ache on me screamed in agony as the slightly touch. Ignis and Gladio helped me back up the slope to the camp as Noct hurriedly explained everything.

“You two did what?!” Gladio roared. He backed down when he saw me flinch. Ignis rummaged through the bags by the makeshift stove and returned to me with a first aid kit. “Are you both insane?”

“Sorry,” we whimpered at the same time.

“I’m just glad you’re alright,” Ignis said, scooting my chair closer to the fire so he could see. “We panicked as soon as we saw the entrance had disappeared. We searched everywhere to find a switch or lever or _some_ way to open it back up. Then we came back here to regroup before trying again.”

“The switch was in the control room,” I said. “Where the jabberwock was.”

“I got the royal arm,” Noctis announced.

“Good,” Ignis said, dabbing at a cut on my forehead, “that saves us a lot of trouble.”

“But _______ took a beating. It wasn’t just that damn dragon that got to her.”

Curious to see if what Noct said was true, I absentmindedly lifted the left side of my shirt and peered down. Prompto gasped. Ignis inhaled sharply. Gladio and Noct came round to see.

Three long scars trailed from near the center of my stomach to my left side. Each was just a bit darker than my skin and easily noticeable. My throat clogged up a bit at the sight. Shit. That was a lot worse than I expected.

“Noct?” Gladio growled lowly.

“Y-yeah?”

“You’re dead meat.”

“You used a potion, I presume?” Ignis asked quietly as Noctis took off with Gladio hot on his trail.

“Yeah,” I said. “Elixir. I fell asleep afterward.”

“Uh, shouldn’t we stop them?” Prompto asked.

“Noct’s had worse,” Ignis said. The sounds of the Noct and Gladio’s scuffle could be heard below the campsite. “And he’ll get an earful from me when that’s over.”

“It’s my fault,” I tried to say as Ignis turned my head. “I shouldn’t have convinced him to explore.”

“Noctis is always getting himself into trouble. He’s just as much at fault for not copping out when things got rough. But still, you both should know better than to explore a tower filled with daemons by yourselves. And not stopping when you should have… With that sort of recklessness, I’m starting to wonder if you really _are_ related in some way.”

“W-well, we did call each other brother and sister. Or at least, I heard him say that to the dragon and reciprocated.”

“Awww,” Prompto gushed. “I _gotta_ get a picture of that soon.”

“Get a picture of what?” Noct came walking up the slope. He looked worse than when we came out of the ruins. His hair was messy and sticking out everywhere. At least one bruise marked his cheek.

“Just your adorable sibling relationship!”

“Fuckin’ knew it,” Gladio said, crossing his arms.

“You okay, Noct?” I asked. He nodded.

“I… kinda deserved it,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. “For not paying attention in there. You’re lucky you didn’t get hurt more.”

“You’re lucky you made it out _alive,”_ Ignis said, cleaning the scratches on my arm.

“You’ve finally earned your stripes,” Gladio said to me proudly. “Even if it’s a bit literal. We should get you that new sword soon.”

“Actually, we found this in there, too,” Noctis said, summoning the pretty sword and handing it to him. “I told her she could keep it.”

“Woah,” Prompto gasped. “That’s totally an awesome sword!”

“Good for your size, too,” Gladio assessed. “Not bad. You just found it in there?”

“Yeah, with the greatsword,” Noct answered. “Same room. Guess that jabberwock’s got a thing for sword collecting.”

Gladio leaned the sword against my chair. I admired its elegance and sighed happily. Ignis continued tending to me. There wasn’t much he could do as most of the wounds were small and all the big damage had been fully body. But I thanked him nonetheless.

Soon all five of us were sitting around the fire in the early morning hours. Glad and Prom looked on with approving amusement as Ignis berated me and Noct for our wild, dangerous escapades.My head hung slightly in shame while Noct glared at the ground to the his left with crossed arms. Before going to bed, they had me and Noct retell everything that had happened in more detail. Once that was over, a nice quiet fell.

“You know,” Noctis turned to me, “a good sword needs a good name.”

“Ooh, what about ‘the Costlemark Destroyer’?” Prompto said, enthusiastically spreading his hands as he spoke. I laughed.

“No, no,” I said. I pulled out my phone and headed to notes. There I had a list of names I had come up with and compiled in Tolkien’s Elvish for stories. Convenient. “Ithilcalad. Elvish for moon’s fire or moonlight.”

“More of that… Lord Ring or Ring Lord thing?” Noctis questioned. I laughed for a second.

“Yep. Lord of the Rings. The guy who wrote them made his own languages. Elvish is really pretty and it’s perfect for naming things. So Ithilcalad.”

The blade gleamed brightly under the night’s watch as we slept.

 

“Uhhh… Noct?”

“Where the hell are we?”

“Nevermind.”

The last I could recall was falling asleep in the Regalia. Noctis made a good pillow, so my head was resting on his shoulder. The purr of the engine carried me away into a shallow yet comfortable sleep. My dreams danced in my mind, senseless yet moving. After exploring Costlemark Tower, this was a very welcome break from being launched across a room by a dragon’s tail.

And then suddenly the car disappeared and I fell. Again. Luckily it wasn’t much of a distance.

Hissing in pain at nearly landing on my tailbone, I took the hand Noctis offered. We frantically looked around.

We had been dropped into a desert. Hard stone and sand stretched as far as the eye could see. It was a barren wasteland. What had happened here?

“Ignis?” Noct called out. No response. We sighed. “Must be Gladio’s doing.”

“Wouldn’t we have woken up?” I asked. He shrugged, checking his pockets for his phone. Mine was missing as well.

“What-? Where did I?”

“Um, Noct?”

“What?”

“Look.”

Behind him was a girl with pink hair and dark colored armor. A black sword was in her right hand. She stood there silently, staring. Both Noct and I took a step back.

“You the welcoming committee?” Noct asked. She said nothing, only pulled her sword back. Noctis pushed me out of the way, both of us summoning our own weapons. Ithilcalad shined in the desert sunlight.

Before the girl could land a hit, she collapsed into sparkles. I stared at the body and then looked back up. We stood there, awestruck. The same girl but lighter in color came toward us.

“You okay?” she asked, sheathing her sword. Noct advanced, ready for a fight. “Wait.”

“You real?” he asked. She rested a hand on her hip.

“What’s it look like?”

He hummed, head turning away. We looked from the corpse of the darker version to the lighter girl standing before us. The darker body dissolved into sparkles.

“I’m sure you can figure it out.”

“I… gotta be dreaming.”

“Hey, if you’re dreaming,” I said, “then so am I. And people don’t share dreams, as far as I know.”

“Sorry but you’re wide awake,” Sword Girl admitted. She crossed her arms. “First-timers, huh?”

I nodded as Noct inquired about her origin. What she from here? She shook her head.

“However, others like us should be here.”

_Others “like us”?_

“There’s others…?” Noct asked awkwardly. He and I exchanged a glance. Another body fell and dissipated, causing me to jerk in surprise.

“Like him.”

“Is that you, Lightning?” the newcomer said. “And they are…?”

My eyes widened. A white-haired man in dark purple armor approached us. Three horns poked out from his helm. He seemed friendly enough, but dressed a bit oddly for the setting.

_Doesn’t he get hot in all those layers?_

“Hey there,” Noctis greeted him. I just waved.

“New allies,” the warrior said. “Welcome to the fight.”

“Fight?” I blurted out. My distressed gaze met Noct’s. “Hold on…”

“I thought it was finished,” Lightning said. My eyes continued to wander the Warrior. Seriously, how was he not burning alive?

“We have been called upon to serve a new purpose,” he stated simply.

_New purpose? Seriously?! I fall into one world and then get transported to another?!_

“By Cosmos?” Lightning asked.

“No, by the heiress of her will.”

 _At least_ someone _knows what’s going on._

“Serve what new purpose?” Noctis asked, raising a hand for emphasis.

“Yeah…” I agreed. “You’re telling me I have to do this _again?”_

“I’ll explain on the way,” Warrior said.

“You’re coming too,” Lightning added.

“Seriously?” Noct and I said exasperatedly at the same time. Warrior nodded. He looked out towards a tall, sparkling tower in the distance.

“We will seek out an audience with her,” he said. I sighed. Great. Another quest to get pulled into. Fucking fantastic.

As we trudged over the deserted landscape, Warrior told us a tale of a cosmic being conveniently name Cosmos. She and another god called Chaos were constantly at war with each other. For their thirteenth fight, Cosmos was incredibly weakened, so she summoned ten warriors to fight for her. They traveled through her world to find crystals (Noct and I exchanged a look) only for Cosmos to be killed when they finished. Then they used their crystals to defeat Chaos and Cosmos revived.

Then they were summoned again, this time with more warriors. They were to fight an army of crystalline warriors. The only problem was that these crystal warriors negated the gods’ abilities to revive after death. So Warrior and some other guy called Kain fought their own allies so they wouldn’t fight the army. But Lightning didn’t like that plan and led some other people to close the portal the crystal army came from.

The story went on and on and I lost interest at some point. The whole time travel thing was weird and confusing and as much as I liked it, I just wanted to get back to Eos and then go home to Earth.

“So you two got names?” Lightning asked. We neared the tower.

“Uh, Noctis,” Noct answered. “And this is _______, my, uh… My… sister.”

I waved.

“You don’t talk much, huh?” Lightning observed. I nodded. “That’s fine. There are some others who are like that.”

The blue tower we walked to stretched up high. It was as tall as a skyscraper and lights twinkled around it. The sharp spires intrigued me. When was this place built? How did they build it? And why, for the love of God, was it in the middle of nowhere?

When we got close enough, the world around disappeared and we were transported to a very blue room with other people standing inside. I blinked. Did we just teleport? Like in Costlemark?

“Noct…” I whispered. “I’m not sure about this…”

“Yeah me neither,” he said. “But maybe whoever called us here can send us home.”

Lots of people with armor milled about. Some stood away from the crowd, others talked and caught up with each other. I noticed one woman with what I think were rabbit ears observing everyone quietly. Some had sharp weapons and odd colored hair. They all looked like they came straight out of an anime.

_Crazy convention, am I right?_

Noctis and I kept to the back of the room. A small boy in an outlandish red outfit stood in front of us. As soon as we were situated, there was a small burst of light and a woman appeared. She floated before us as we gathered around her. A staff of cog wheels and metalwork accompanied her hands. A garment of similar composition sprouted from her back.

“Thank you all for coming here,” she said. “It could not have been easy. I am pleased, however, that you answered my call.”

I just stared at her. Eyebrows furrowing, my head tilted confusedly.

“I am Materia.”

Sounds of the same confusion answered her greeting. They whispered amongst themselves.

_Great. They don’t know what’s going on, either._

“Uh… who?” one of the guys in front of me said.

“Beats me,” Outlandish Boy said.

“It is my purpose to deliver this world from the grip of Void,” Materia went on. “To prevent its destruction.”

_Poor Void. Always getting a bad rep._

“I am the manifestation of order and harmony in this realm. A god, if you will.”

That seemed to shock everyone further. Then one man stepped forward. His white hair cascaded down his lightly colored armor.

“You speak of preventing destruction,” he said, “but how do you intend to do this?”

Materia lifted her arm up. “The realm feeds off a very specific energy - energy born of battle. Despite the best of my efforts, however, I have yet to produce it myself. Thus-”

“Thus you gathered us here completely out of the blue,” Lightning said firmly. “And against our will.”

“Yes.”

_What? Does she seriously have no remorse for kidnapping us?_

“So that we’d fight each other?” Lightning furthered. Materia hesitated.

“Why is she wearing a laundry basket?” I whispered to Noct. He snorted. A few of the people around hs gave me various glances and glares.

“....Yes,” she said finally.

“Leave it to a god to just do as they please,” Lightning muttered.

_Oh COME on. Again?!_

“I’ll say…” I muttered, folding my arms against my chest. Noct gave me his best sympathetic glance.

The Warrior from our arrival walked to the front. “Let us forget the means for a moment. You wish us to preserve harmony in this world, do you not?”

Materia looked away. “Um, well… Uh…”

“Well what?” said a guy with a… was that a tail?

“Yes. Please, for the sake of my world-”

The room began shaking, the calm blue light turning into a fiery red. Everyone went on high alert. I stepped closer to Noctis. A disembodied, English accent spoke loudly.

“The sake of _your_ world, you say?” the male voice taunted. “You may call me Spiritus.”

_Better name than ‘Materia.’_

“I am a god, born of dimensional fragments and given form to rule this world.”

Apparently Materia had never heard of this, either. She really needs to get a grip if she’s going to rule a planet. She stated that she is that world’s only keeper. A screen opened behind us, showing a realm of fire and villains. Our view spiraled up to face Spiritus.

“Continue to think that if you wish. It bothers me not. My might, however, will soon prove you wrong!”

Spiritus had white hair and a very muscular body. I couldn’t but blush slightly, cheeks heating up. It was hard to make out any other features in the shadows of his realm.

“This is a cruel world, and it can only be tamed by a crueler heart!”

_Undertale says otherwise, pal. Show some Mercy._

Laughing, Spiritus’ image faded as his weird Skype call ended. No one said anything after confirming Materia was okay. Her head tilted downward, eyes away from us all. Then Noctis decided that was a good time to raise his hand.

“You’re not in school,” I muttered. He elbowed me.

“Um…” He got Materia’s attention. “Hate to butt in here, but do you think I can ask… how we get back home?”

I summoned my courage to add, “Yeah… This has already happened to me once and lemme just say that twice is a bit much.”

Materia loomed confused. Her head leaned left.

“Who… are you?” she asked me. My fluttering heart nearly stopped. “I do not remember calling you here.”

People began to whisper and talk amidst themselves. Some loomed curious, others were suspicious. Their gazes bore into me. Embarrassed heat crept up my cheeks. No one gave me a reassuring glance. I shrunk behind Noctis, peering over his shoulder.

“This is ______,” Noct answered for me. “She’s my… sister.”

“She should not have been able to come here. Unless… You were touching at the time of the call.”

“We were napping in the car, yeah. So, uh, can we get back home please?”

“You may not.”

Noct and I made noises of protests.

“I beseech you, both of you, defeat Spiritus. That will be all.”

Everyone began to mingle about. Noctis and I just stood awkwardly, unsure of how to respond to our new situation.

“I’m going to kill something,” I growled lowly.

“Hey, don’t worry,” Noctis assured me. “We’ll get back soon, I’m sure.”

“Yeah, but this is yet _another_ god who thinks it’s cool to take me from my home. And I’m not supposed to be here but she won’t let me go back? Who does that?”

“I know, I know. But maybe if we get this done, she’ll let us go.”

“I almost want to _not,_ just to spite her.”

“Noctis,” someone said. We looked up to see the Warrior of Light approaching us. “Why don’t you come with us? We can help you adjust.”

Someone was with him. My cheeks heated up more at the second guy. He was very handsome and my nervousness had me averting my eyes.

 _Why are there so many attractive people here? They’re going to kill me! Figuratively_ and _literally!_

“Cecil,” the second guy said. “Nice to meet you.”

“Noctis,” Noct said for the millionth time. “And this is _______. She’s, uh, pretty shy.”

The ground looked very interesting all of a sudden as Cecil greeted me. My hand clasped around my wrist and I swayed awkwardly, nodding. Then the four of us were transported out of the tower and back to the desert.


	21. Go On A Roadtrip, They Said

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Journey 1.5 begins.

“Our questions are many,” Warrior said. “One thing however is clear - Materia requires our strength to achieve her objective.”

_What strength?_

“Noct, I can’t even fight!” I whispered furiously. “Not well, at least!”

“Then she shall have it,” Cecil said. “For now, anyway.”

“Wait,” Noct said. “‘For now’?”

“As he said, there is much we don’t know.”

“Is there now?”

“We would do well to move forward with caution,” Warrior spoke up. “Regardless, action shall prove more fruitful than idleness.”

He turned and began to walk towards our destination, wherever that was. Cecil followed. Noctis and I looked at each other and did the same.

“Don’t worry,” he said quietly. “I won’t let anything hurt you again. Not like last time.”

Cecil glanced back at us as we caught up.

“We just finished Costlemark,” I said to Noct. “Don’t we get a chance to rest?”

“Apparently not.”

I met Cecil’s gaze and immediately looked away. I absentmindedly ran my thumb over the scars I got from the daemons in the ruins. Hopefully nothing like that awaited us on this journey.

“You said this has happened before?” Cecil asked, curious.

“Did- D-Did I…?” I stuttered.

“The whole room heard it,” Noct said. “There weren’t exactly that many people in there.”

“O-oh… Um… Uh, Noct…?”

“________ fell into my world - literally. My friends and I caught her and let her tag along with us. Speaking of which, she’s still learning how to use a sword, so… we’re gonna need to be extra careful.”

Our companions nodded.

“You said you were siblings,” Warrior teased, though it didn’t sound like a tease. He seemed to speak in only one or two tones.

“Uh, only in spirit,” Noct said.

“Noct is a _nerd,”_ I emphasized.

“Hey! _You’re_ the nerd.”

“I know. You’re one too.”

Cecil and Warrior looked amused.

The journey was both long and short. The desert heat beat down on us, though the rest of the atmosphere of this weird planet cooled us down. The air smelled of dust and sand. A tower glowed red in the distance. I assumed that was our objective. Besides getting the crystals, of course.

“So what exactly is this place?” Noctis asked after a while of mostly silence.

“Yeah,” I added. “Some kind of desert wasteland?”

“It is a remnant of the world Cosmos lived in,” Warrior theorized. “I am not surprised by its desolateness. It has been long since she lived here.”

“So post-apocalyptic world of doom, got it.”

At some point I took off my jacket and tied it around my waist. It was a wonder how Cecil and Warrior could keep all that armor on.

_Think they’ll take a few layers off?_

_Stop._

Noctis caught me staring at Cecil. Rolling his eyes, he gave me a small, sobering shove. I shoved him back. He shoved harder. I tried again and he stepped forward and I missed. My feet stumbled but my balance held. Noct grinned.

Growling softly, my hand sparked with electricity. Aiming carefully, I released a tiny bit of lightning energy. It hit Noct in the back of the head. He hissed and stopped in his tracks. The slightest bit of smoke wafted up from singed hairs.

“What the hell was that for?” he asked angrily, spinning around. Cecil and Warrior stopped to inspect the commotion.

“Stop shoving me!” I retaliated.

“Then stop staring!”

“Well don’t shove me and I won’t!”

“What’s going on?” Cecil asked. Noct and I pointed at each other.

“He/She started it!” we chorused.

“She zapped me with lightning!”

“You _shoved_ me first.”

“You weren’t focusing!”

“You’re not focusing either!”

“I’m focusing more than you.”

“You made me almost fall!”

“We don’t have time for arguments,” Warrior cut in. “Materia is counting on us. There is still much we have to discover and squabbles like this won’t help.”

“Sorry…” we both said sheepishly. Noctis rubbed his neck. I stared at the ground.

“We just had a… _very_ long day and night before we came here,” I explained quietly. Our companions nodded. “But we’ll behave. For now.”

At some point, maybe two-thirds of the way to wherever we were going, we were suddenly attacked by floating specters. Each was a different color and there were three. Noct told me to hang back. I did, albeit guiltily for not being able to help. I watched Cecil and Warrior. They were very experienced, more so than Noct, but the three of them worked together pretty well.

Then one of specters noticed I was unarmed and came charging at me. I summoned Ithilcalad and swung up, blocking the translucent ghost. It screamed at me. Trusting instinct better than my training and suddenly the specter was frozen solid. It’s gaping mouth reminded me of an angler fish. The ice broke into a million pieces as Cecil shattered it with one blow.

“Are you alright? he asked. I swallowed and nodded. That was a close one.

“You can use magic,” Warrior said with a smile. “That will be useful on our journey.”

“You okay?” Noct asked, hurrying over.

“Yeah,” I said. “Wasn’t as bad as the jabberwock.”

“You two fought a jabberwock?” Cecil said, surprised.

“And barely survived, but yes.”

“It was the only way to get out of this tower we got locked in,” Noctis explained. “It was guarding the control room.”

“It’s good to have new allies,” Warrior said. “And new friends. We have much to learn from each other and our experiences.”

“Well, lesson one is don’t fight a jabberwock,” I quipped. My smile was the result of their laughter.

The last stretch of our trek took us through some bare, rocky mountains. The only color was gray. Bits of green grass cropped up here and there, but there wasn’t much of it.

_Someone needs to get new decorations…_

A cliff lied at the end of the bluffs. A white circle shimmered and pulsed as we neared it. That must be where we were going. Warrior led us down the last slope as Noctis tried to explain to Cecil why were so desperate to get back home.

“I got people waiting on me,” he said in exasperation.

“Right,” Cecil said.

“Things were not lookin’ too good when I left.”

“I’ll say,” I muttered.

“And you have no way of speaking with them,” Cecil surmised. Noct turned, pointing a finger at him.

“Yeah,” he said, surprised.

“We are the same. Even now my allies worry.”

We had all stopped by then. Warrior was closest to the glimmering portal. He turned to speak.

“I see we all have a place to call home.” He looked to me. “Even if it is temporary.”

My gaze turned down, cheeks warming.

“Even you?” Cecil asked.

“Yes,” Warrior answered. “Even if I did not, though, that would change nothing. I still would have answered her call. Of that I have little doubt. Sorry you were involved.”

My eyebrows furrowed. Was that sarcasm or was he being sincere? Noctis turned his head to the side.

“It’s not like you’re the one to blame,” he said, shifting his weight to one foot. Warrior nodded and began to walk into the portal. We just watched.

“Ever have someone you didn’t understand…” Cecil started to say.

“Hmm?”

“And yet you find that what is important to them… suddenly becomes important to you?”

I perked up. “Yeah! That’s how I feel with Noct! And his friends, of course.”

“_______…” Noct trailed, a bit touched. I smiled at him.

“You did the same for me,” I said. To hide his slightly flushing face, he looked back to the retreating frame of Warrior. 

“So… _that’s_ how he feels.”

“To put it simply,” Cecil finished. Noctis sighed and raised his to put his hands behind his head.

“Anyway, it’s like he said. Nothing’s gonna get done if we just stand here.”

“Agreed.”

We walked to catch up with Warrior. I guessed he didn’t have a name or didn’t feel comfortable giving it. He shifted to face us.

“Cecil, Noctis, ______,” he looked at each of us. “Thank you.”

“Think nothing of it,” Cecil said amicably.

“Yeah, um,” Noct spoke awkwardly, “no worries.”

I gave him two thumbs up. “Same.”

With a “shall we?” we all filed through the portal.


	22. Where’s My Epic Background Music?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A crystal makes an appearance.

I shivered as I stepped through the portal. It felt like an electric current ran down my whole body. Shaking it off, I watched Noctis come through. We both stood to the side to see how far we had come.

An entire ravine stretched out between the portals. I appreciated having not fallen off the cliffs or not having to walk across the entire thing. I inched forward to look what lied at the bottom. Noct held me back.

“We’re all in one piece,” Cecil stated.

“So that’s how it works,” Noctis said.

“Now we’re thinking with portals.” I gave the ravine double finger guns. No one understood the joke but me.

“Noctis, look.” Warrior pointed to the portal. We scooted closer to see the inside change to an image of a deep blue crystal.

“What the…” Noct voiced.

“Is that like the one you have at home?” I asked him.

A bright blue light erupted from Materia’s tower in the distance. It shot up into the sky, lighting the areas around it in a cerulean glow.

“Woah, that’s crazy!” Noctis exclaimed. He smiled while looking up at the beam. A small grin wormed its way onto my face too.

“Our conflict is what sparked this phenomenon,” Warrior explained.

“The beacon of Minas Tirith has been lit,” I whispered to myself. I hopped back a bit and looked at Noct. “Gondor calls for aid!”

“You’re such a nerd,” he laughed. “Man, if the guys were here, they’d totally flip at seeing this.”

“Wish we had our phones to take a picture…”

We all shifted around to see what would come next. I saw another portal, this one closer than the last. Thank goodness. My feet were starting to hurt.

“Let us press on,” Cecil said. “We should reach Spiritus soon enough.”

The walk _looked_ short. It felt longer, maybe twice as long. There wasn’t even anything to look at. Just dull, gray stone and dust. I started to question whether or not being there was worth it but then remembered I wasn’t even supposed to be here.

_Are we… really just doing as a random goddess asked? No, **demanded?** She hardly even let us ask to leave. I know Noct is a good candidate to choose for help as a hero, but… didn’t she take into consideration our own problems?_

I felt my eyes twitch. The longer they let me remain in my own thoughts, the worse my mood would get. If there was one thing I hated more than downright rudeness, it was inconsiderateness. I had been thrown one world by some gods I’d never heard of already. I had made the best of it, found some great friends who accepted me as one of their own. Only the same thing had happened again.

_I swear if this happens a third time, there will be a reckoning._

_Just channel that frustration into your magic and we’ll be fine._

About halfway across the chasm, Cecil turned to Noctis, frowning. I wondered what was wrong. We continued walking as they spoke, Warrior leading us but listening closely.

“Noctis,” Cecil said.

“Uh, yeah?”

“I know there’s been conflict already… And she seemed just fine…”

“But…?”

“But you said your ‘sister’ isn’t very experienced with combat?”

“Oh, right.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, she, uh, just started learning, actually. My friends and I have been teaching her. Her magic is a more natural skill, though.”

“I’m right here,” I muttered.

“Forgive me,” Cecil said with a small smile. Heat rushed to my cheeks.

“...It’s fine… And it’s not just elemental. I can heal, too, if you need it.”

“Another useful skill,” Warrior said up ahead. “I have a feeling we will need of such a talent.”

“She was blessed by the Glacian,” Noct declared proudly. I knew he did it to tease me.

“Noooct…” I whined, giving him a playful push. “You’re the ‘chosen one’.”

“I didn’t ask to be.”

“Well I didn’t ask to be sent to Eos!”

“R-right…” He sounded so guilty. My heart broke a little.

I stopped walking and gave him what I hoped was a reassuring smile. “But I’m glad I was. Then I wouldn’t have met you and your friends.”

Cecil and Warrior were glancing at each other, amused. Noctis’ blue eyes widened and he looked away.

“Uh, yeah, I…” He paused awkwardly. “I’m glad you came, too.”

Beaming, I looked to Cecil to see if he had anything else to say. He smiled and looked to Warrior once more.

“Well, if we have time,” he said, “we could take a break to see what she knows.”

And that’s when we were attacked by more specters.

It would seem that whatever was sending these realized an unexpected person was amidst Materia’s champions. There were four of them this time. I didn’t have a moment to inspect them, but they all resembled humans in some way except for a very small rodent-looking lady who laughed at me. I didn’t like that. Summoning Ithilcalad, I rushed to where Noctis was taking two of them on. I would stay by his side however long I could.

My sword crossed with another, blocking a blow that would’ve landed Noct on his back. The specter jumped up and began… flying? They glided through the air, away from me. Like an invisible line turning red I watched as they rushed in for another attack. Noctis did the double jump too as I parried. Then he was flying too.

“How did you do that?” I called. I ran as far as I could before turning and releasing a burst of flames upon the person targeting me. Dammit, I was running out of fire juice.

“Just jump and think of where you want to go. It’s like dashing in midair!”

Ithilcalad blocked another attack.

“If this doesn’t work, you’re getting another opponent,” I muttered at Noctis. My enemy hopped away, targeting me again. “Here goes nothing!”

A leap of faith. That’s what it was. I ran and leaped into the air. Wind whipped through my hair. It threatened to knock my glasses clean off. But… I was doing it! I was _flying!_

“Atta girl!” I heard Noct call out. “Takin’ it to ‘em!”

“Shut up, Noct!”

Somehow this new ability unlocked new confidence in me. It was the weirdest feeling, motivation, but it was a good feeling. I dashed to my target and slashed. And slashed again. She sidestepped. I released a bolt of lightning. Then, when her health seemed low, a burst of energy washed over me. Ithilcalad lit up and I struck quickly. Three times it was, and my sword froze, burned, and sparked with magic in that order. My enemy was incapacitated.

The battle was won. My sword, Ithilcalad, vanished to wherever it was Noct stored all our weapons. I stared at the vanishing specter in amazement.

“Did you see that?!” I shouted excitedly at Noct. “It was just like a video game!”

“I know, right?” he said as I neared. “I hope that crosses over when we get back.”

“Me too! Can you imagine the look on Gladio’s face? And Prompto’s?”

“Man, they’d be so jealous.”

Cecil and Warrior joined us. I stayed happily quiet as my companions congratulated each other. Then I realized I had other abilities. I tapped Noct once and then Cecil and Warrior. The pain spread through me, though it wasn’t as bad as on Eos. I shook it off.

“I think it’s safe to say our mage is in good hands,” Warrior nodded at me. I smiled back.

_Their mage. Great, now I’m getting attached._

Though, it was a safe bet to say Noctis was, too.


	23. Twilight Healer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader and friends make a discovery and continue on to an encounter with a very interesting man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! *waves*

We finally made it to the second portal. This one was leading us across another ravine. The cross through was the same. I felt that electric spark and then it dissipated. Noct and I turned to see how far we had come. The portal scene changed to show the blue crystal again. The guys all nodded at each other, ready to keep going.

As we turned to walk away, the glow from the portal became yellow. We twisted around to see what was happening. Something long and serpentine was winding around the crystal. Its yellow body looked much like a snake.

“What is…?” Warrior trailed off.

Is _that a snake…?_

His eyes went wide. The serpent swam closer, enveloping the crystal and its surroundings with black particles. It looked like a computer glitch. The snake drew so close we could make out clear features. It was definitely a snake and it was gold and its head reminded of that one dinosaur that spits venom. You know the one. From Jurassic Park.

“Jormungandr…?” I muttered. It was the only explanation I had. Its mouth opened and snapped, breaking through the portal like it was coming through glass. Noct pushed me to the side and swung out at it with a sword. The serpent flew up into the sky.

“Dammit,” he whispered. “What do we do now?”

“How ‘bout we don’t fight the giant snek?” I suggested.

“No, we have to-”

“______ is right,” Cecil said. I blinked in surprise. “We push on.”

“Wait, what? And just let it go?”

“Dwell not upon it,” Warrior ordered. He began to walk towards our next destination: yet another portal. “Cecil is correct. The fruit our battle bore seems to have withered against that light.”

We jogged up a bit to keep up.

“We’ve seen this destroyer of dimensions before,” Cecil explained. “And it went by many a sonorous name.”

_Why does everyone here but Noct and me talk like they’re in the Middle Ages or something? Don’t they know this isn’t a Shakespeare play?_

“Whatever the name,” Warrior cut in, “it burdens Materia.”

I looked at Noctis. “Destroyer of dimensions…?”

_Please don’t tell me all our worlds are gone now._

“And us,” Noct said in response to Warrior.

“For certain,” Cecil agreed. He glanced at me. “You mentioned Jormungandr.”

“Yeah,” Noct said, confused. “Who’s that?”

“The World Eater,” I quoted. “Er, wait that might be Alduin… Anyway, Jormungandr is the world serpent from Norse mythology. One of the sons of Loki born to Angrboda. When Ragnarok comes, he’ll eat the world or something like that.”

“Ragnarok?”

“Norse end of the world; apocalypse. And a really great Marvel movie.”

“Oh. Great.”

“Yep.”

When we reached the portal, Warrior pointed his sword at it. I wondered what the point of it was.

“Perhaps the time has come to reconsider who our enemy truly is,” he said. We stepped through the portal.

 

“Please don’t tell me this happened _again.”_

Our surroundings were significantly different from the barren gray wasteland we had just been in. It actually looked like a sci-fi setting of some sort. Lights were embedded in the ground, providing the area with a way to see. A strip of of a blue circuit pattern wormed its way around the room.

“If this is another world I’m getting dropped into, there will be a riot,” I growled. My hands subconsciously crackled with electricity. An eye twitched.

“Calm down,” Noctis said. “We’ll get home eventually.”

“Eventually being the key word, Noct.”

Before was a red crystal, this one shining darkly. A man with longish brown hair stood with his back to us. I got a regal vibe from him and his outfit. He must be someone important where he’s from. His arms were folded behind him. The four of us stood still and waited.

“Do the goddess’ blind faithful come to do her bidding?” he asked, turning his head. My heart jumped into fast mode.

_Holy shit now **that’s** a voice I can get behind._

No one said anything for a few seconds. Then my friend took the lead.

“Not her faithful,” Noctis said amicably. “Here because we gotta be.”

“Actually I am an outlier,” I muttered, unaware the room made things echo slightly, “and should not have been counted.”

Noct laughed. “I don’t think you realize how accurate that is about you.”

I shrugged. The strange man could see us, though his back was still turned. He eyed me for a split second before returning to Noct.

“Ah,” he said, nodding, “all that was left you was to submit.”

_Oh I’ll gladly submit. But not to the goddess._

_You have a **problem.**_

“Not that we wanted to,” Noct replied with a resigned sigh. I nodded in agreement.

“Big mood,” I said. The man turned around completely. My breath hitched for a second, heart jumping into hyperdrive.

_He’s **gorgeous.**_

Lord save me.

“It is for the best, to be sure,” he said. My cheeks flushed, though I hoped to God no one could see. But… Noctis, knowing me, gave me a deadpan side glance. I shrunk back guiltily.

_Sorry, Noct._

“Though dullards they may appear, from desolate earth they have conjured worlds one would think beyond their ken.”

 _Forget Warrior and Cecil._ This _guy takes the cake for Shakespearean eloquence._

“There is no reasoning here. We must only listen and obey.”

The spell was broken. With one line, this guy, whoever he was, brought back my frustration with becoming an unwilling world hopper.

“No thanks,” I ground out, crossing my arms. The man, who I later learned was called Vayne, looked me in the eye. A ghost of the smallest grin perked up on him. “I’d rather keep my mind, thanks.”

Noct shoved me slightly. The lightning sparked slightly in my hands again. I gave him a warning glance.

Warrior drew his sword. That sobered me. My eyes widened at the thought of another elite battle I could hardly keep up with. Something told me we shouldn’t mess with this guy.

“Then I take it…” Warrior prompted, “you are prepared to do what you must?”

I looked worriedly at Noctis. He was staring at our new friends like he was starting to wonder if something was wrong with them. Cecil had also drawn his sword. I quickly canceled the angry sparkling in my fingers.

“That gravitas is why you’re our leader,” Cecil told Warrior. I didn’t remember electing him. I just thought we were a group with one guy who actually knew what he was doing.

_Oohhhhh it’s a **group** project!! And I guess that means I’m that one person who isn’t really great at contributing…_

Vayne raised an armored and white-gloved hand. It extended towards us like a welcome.

“Are you guys actually enjoying this?” Noct asked. His hands were on his hips. He looked so stern I almost laughed. But he was right.

“Yeah…” I whispered in agreement.

“Of course,” Vayne told us. “Us pawns must fight for our freedom.”

“Again,” I muttered, quieter this time, “outlier and should not be counted.”

“Just stay in the shadows,” Noct told me. He summoned one of his weapons. “We’ll be done soon.”

I sighed and took a step back. “Fiiine. If you guys get killed, I’ll kill you again. Especially you, Noctis.”

“Duly noted,” Warrior said lightly. Cecil nodded. Apparently my personality amused him.

Four specters joined Vayne’s side. I guess it had to be an even match. Fair enough. Except… Wait…

“I’m afraid being an outlier is no exception,” our opponent said to me. My heart jumped again, but not in blatant attraction. I stared at the green silhouette at his right side.

“Is that me?!” I exclaimed. Noctis and I exchanged a very worried look. My alternate self smirked, raising a hand burning with flames. My own sparked and sizzled electrically with irritation. Noct’s eyes narrowed.

“If that’s how you’re gonna be,” he growled. “Leave my sister out of this!”

“It’s an even match, Noct,” I sighed, more resigned than he was earlier. My anger was starting to wane. This whole place was so tiring. “Although I _swear_ I wouldn’t have interfered!”

The battle began. I didn’t move for a second. My body just slumped forward tiredly before summoning Ithilcalad.

_Really, anger? Did you HAVE to disappear right when I need you?_

“Oh shit,” I muttered. Counterfeit me was running straight in my direction. “Fine, let’s get this over with.”

Fighting against myself was hard. We both knew what the other would try. The only difference was that she was a lot cockier than me. I dashed away through the air. A lightning bolt missed her as she dodged. I noticed the telltale sign of ice magic and rushed forward to swing out to cancel it. She blocked and knocked me back. I hopped away. We stood for a moment, assessing the other. My friends and their oddly polite enemy could be heard clashing nearby.

 _Eh, gotta try_ something.

In a weird movement that could almost be described as a one arm dance, me and my alternate self raised our left arms and clenched a fist. I moved quickly away but she didn’t run fast enough. My movements were just one second swifter. She froze. I rushed forward and slashed twice. The ice broke and she growled at me.

“This is the most surreal day of my life and that is _saying something!”_ I didn’t realized I had shouted. Noctis called back something about falling. “It’s a bit different than that, but yeah!”

Swing. Block. Slash. Parry. I stepped back and stared at her.

“Stop copying me,” I seethed. She just smirked. I growled shortly and rushed. She underestimated my returning fury. I thought about the fall and how the gods on Noct’s world thought I’d just be fine. Inconsiderate. I thought of Materia and her utter disapproval at me being here even though it was _her_ fault in the first place. My eye twitched again. I stabbed Ithilcalad forward. Other Me stumbled back. Then she retaliated with the same move. I nearly fell over.

Her eerily warped voice echoed in my mind. “What’s the matter? Scared of a little fall?”

Oh man the heat returned with a blazing burst of fire. A flame shot to the center of the room. It spread out to encircle our battlefield. Every inch of me burned.

“That’s none of your damn business, _me,”_ I snarled. The magic lit up in my veins and my sword. Fire slash, electric swing, ice cut. The final blow exploded in electrically charged ice shards. She was incapacitated. “I least I can best _myself.”_

I turned to see Noctis warping through the air. Warrior focused on the red crystal, trying to shatter it. Cecil was fighting on his own, but he seemed fine. Vayne was targeting Noctis, whose back was turned to fight a dark version of Lightning. With an angry huff, I flew over to Noct’s side. Just as Vayne reached him, I swung up, blade freezing over. He just narrowly dodged it, looking almost surprised but not quite. There was no telling what he was thinking. I didn’t get this guy but hey, he was attractive.

He was also trying to hurt my brother.

Noctis and I fought back to back now. Warrior had given up on the crystal, seeing our struggle and was now fighting a newly revived Other Me and someone I didn’t recognize. Noctis managed to get a small break as he knocked Shadow Lightning back. He nudged me.

“Think you can freeze the place over?” he asked. My stance faltered. Could I? “You made that ring of fire, right?”

_I fell into a burning ring of fire. I went down, down, down-_

_NOT. NOW._

Shit, Vayne saw my opening. I panicked and raised my arms up swiftly, Ithilcalad dissipating. My fright caused a flare of cold and snowflakes to surround a five foot radius.

_Why am I better at fighting in this world? Is it really a video game?_

But Vayne was still coming in at supersonic speed. I started panicking more, forgetting my training. My hands were freezing and covered in frost. Could I do something with that?

Noctis warped in from behind me and “Noct’d” our adversary down. I sighed in relief, not realizing I had been holding my breath. Lightning came in at Noct, too. Ithilcalad was knocked out of my hand by the force of her strength. I summoned it back. My rage had been replaced with fear. I couldn’t fight these people. They were too good. Lightning prepared another attack. With a scared little whimper I dashed and flew away. She chased me. My feet hit the ground again and I had to run. I spun around to see her flying in at me. Ithilcalad was raised.

Someone in the distance was incapacitated. We had won somehow. Lightning evaporated. I stared in marveled, relieved awe. I had survived. I had actually survived.

The crimson crystal in the center of the room shattered on its own. My friends and I stood a shorter distance from Vayne than earlier. I cowered near Noctis, feeling exhausted. My lungs were working overtime. They demanded paid vacations. My legs and arms screamed at me in defiance of their recent actions.

Vayne gave a short sigh and his head turned down slightly, looking away. Then he stood up straight and addressed one of us.

“Noctis, yes?” he said. “Pray tell, for what purpose do you fight - or would you fight - were you back home?”

Noct started forward but then calmed. He thought for a second. “Something important was taken from me. I mean to take it back.”

The corners of my mouth threatened to lift at his determination. Vayne gave a thoughtful hum.

“That doesn’t mean mean I’m just doing it for myself, though,” Noctis continued. “I’m doing it for everyone who depends on me.”

My heart fluttered slightly. All eyes were on him.

“For everyone who has supported me this whole time.”

“Noct…” I whispered, touched.

“I can’t let them down… not when I owe them so much. …I need to get back soon.”

Tears of sentiment pricked my eyes. We’d had our little heartfelt talks before, but… Noctis had never said anything like this. My gaze turned to the ground, wondering how to respond.

“So…” Vayne said. “You bind yourself with fetters of your own making…”

Silence. Cecil stepped forward.

“What binds _you_ lends _us,”_ he said, “and Materia - the strength to protect what we cherish.”

Vayne was quiet for a moment. Then he looked to me. I straightened in awkwardness.

“______, was it? And what is it that you fight for?” he asked. My heart sputtered and did flips in nervousness for being put on the spot. Noctis opened his mouth to talk for me. Vayne shook his head. “No, no. Let her answer for herself.”

“Um,” I thought. “Well… Do you mean… On my home planet? Or Noct’s? ‘Cause the answer is gonna be _reeeaaally_ different depending on your answer.”

This seemed to spark curiosity in everyone around me. I glanced at each of them and tilted my head down to avoid eye contact.

“I mean… I’ve said this a million times on Eos, but… Noctis and his friends have done so much for me since I… literally fell there. I don’t know if I can even get home, so… I just want to help them as best I can. And it isn’t much I can do, but…”

I looked Noct directly in the eye.

“They’re like family to me now.”

The fire around us began to die down. I released the jacket zipper I was subconsciously playing with and the flames went out.

“I see…” Vayne trailed. “And were you back home?”

I hid away in my hair. The weight of guilt pressed down on my chest like someone slowly handing me an anvil. “Nothing, I guess. There isn’t really… anything I can think of… besides the same, but in a lesser quality.”

Noctis riled up slightly, concerned. “Hey, you-”

“Don’t,” I interrupted. “Please. We’ve gone over this before. Kind of.”

“A soul of kindness,” Vayne said slowly, “of such compassion… has hardly any place in such ruthless worlds.”

“A soft heart in a cruel world is strength, not weakness.”

His turned more towards me. After another small bout of silence, he said, “So it is.”

Warrior sheathed his sword. “Our work here is done. Let us depart.”

A portal opened up at the other end of the small room. A realization forced itself upon me as I watched my slightly weary companions. With a small noise of exclamation I rushed forward. Noct got a boop to the nose, Cecil’s shoulder was poked, and Warrior’s back was tapped. The pain was greater than the last battle. It was spread all over me. I hunched over a bit. Noctis came striding back.

“You okay?” he asked. I nodded. Then I straightened and before Noct could stop me, I was swiftly walking to where Vayne had stood aside to let us pass. I held a hand out. He looked rather confused, but took it anyway. My hand glowed turquoise and I felt the aches coming and twitched slightly. They faded.

With blushing cheeks, I made the rapid guess that he was a noble of some sort as he lifted my hand and gave my knuckles a soft kiss.

_Fuck._

“______, get a move on already!” Noctis called. Warrior and Cecil had already gone through the portal. An embarrassed tremor rattled up my spine.

“Right!” I called back. “Sorry!”

I looked back to Vayne, avoiding eye contact.

“Um, bye!”

I hurried back to the portal, heat blossoming all over me. Noctis rolled his eyes and went through to the other side. Before I stepped into it, I looked back. Vayne was still watching. A moment passed.

The portal closed as I went through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve never actually played FFXII before so I have no idea if I got Vayne’s character right. All I had to go off of was his wiki page and this video here that this scene is from:  
> https://youtu.be/az3pk2zh4ZY
> 
> (and yeah I’ve got it bad for Vayne, sue me)


	24. Memory Bubbles Are A Blessing And A Curse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The portals lead Reader to a familiar location.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took some creative liberties with how the portals and rooms work. Hope it’s alright!

A wondrous meadow of pretty pale green opened up on a sparkling lake. A magnificent castle lied on the other wide. A great expanse of cloud dotted blue sky stretched up and over. Noctis and I walked forward, taking in the beautiful scenery. A breeze blew by, causing the grass to roll like waves. Cecil stood before us, just as in awe.

“Are we…” Noctis asked, “inside the gateway?”

“That we are,” Warrior answered. “It was here my journey first began.”

“It’s beautiful,” I complimented. He nodded.

“And you’ve been to that castle?” Cecil questioned.

“Indeed,” Warrior said. “The princess had been spirited away, and I pledged my sword to her rescue.”

_Classic._

“However, what awaited us-”

He was interrupted by a loud laugh. I spun around. A great sword on a chain launched itself at us from a portal of swirling darkness. My heart nearly stopped. Just as it reached us, Warrior swung out his arm. An array of golden shields appeared and blocked us from harm’s way.

A man in full metal armor, helmet and all, stepped out from the portal. He was gigantic. Two large horns protruded from his helmet, reminding me of a bull. He towered over us. A sword pointed straight at Warrior.

“Do you remember me?” the villain said in an equally villainous voice. “You were lucky enough to defeat me once!”

_No I do not remember you and I’m glad that I don’t._

“Garland!” Warrior proclaimed. “How did I know you would be here?”

“Interesting,” Garland said, reaching out and curling his fingers into a fist. “I could say the same thing to you!”

I stepped back. I really did not want to touch this guy. At all. Or even be near him. Noctis moved to be in front of me. Cecil did the same. Warrior held his blade vertically in from him.

“Fate seems set on having us,” Warrior swung his blade to the side in a diagonal slash, “cross swords evermore.”

Garland swung his own sword up and behind him. The obvious intimidation move was very effective - on me, at least. My body was shivering. I had never seen a person that tall.

“Even though we are no longer bound by time,” Garland taunted, “we are still bound by destiny to fight!”

Warrior seemed almost excited to fight this guy again. He eagerly turned to speak to us. Noctis paused for a second, unsure whether to heed Garland’s words.

“Cecil, Noctis,” he said, “let us oblige him!”

“Oh, okay,” I squeaked. “I’m totally fine with staying here. Just say if you need something.”

“Just… stay out of the way,” Noctis instructed. “I’ll try to stay as close as I can.”

I nodded. Thankfully Garland hadn’t expected four of us. Two shadow heroes (or were they villains?) appeared next to him. I watched the fight from a safe distance. Seeing as I wasn’t acting as a threat, no one attacked me. I saw Garland look toward me a few times. He contemplated aiming at me to provoke Noctis and our new friends. Fortunately, he decided to not act on those thoughts.

The fight was over with much struggle on both sides. Garland and Warrior were quite evenly matched. Noctis helped here and there. He was good at interrupting enemy attacks. Warping proves to be even more of a useful skill. Cecil helped Noct defend me whenever someone got too close and Noct wasn’t able to get there in time. I summoned my sword just in case. I never got a chance to use it.

The sun started to set as the battle ended. My friends won, though I still couldn’t tell what justified a victory yet. Garland had the high ground as twilight fell. The sky behind him was purple. Warrior faced him ever bravely.

“You owe me an answer,” he demanded. “Is Spiritus the one sapping this world’s life force?”

_I don’t think he is. Did he ever **state** that he was? It seemed like he wanted to rule over it instead. You can’t rule over a nonexistent world._

“Nonsense,” Garland told him. “He is the successor of the old gods, and deeply bound to this place. He desires not its destruction.”

“I fuckin’ knew it,” I muttered, coming up behind Noctis.

“If he speaks true,” Cecil thought, “then we are only wasting our efforts.”

“You’re correct,” Warrior said, turning to him. “We must return at once and apprise Materia of-”

“Uh, hold up!” Noctis raised his hand again. He had our attentions. “So… um, well… We don’t have to go all the way back there.”

“We don’t?” I said hopefully. Finally, a break from walking miles to do nothing.

“Remember how Materia and Spiritus could communicate in real time back at her dome?”

“You mean otherworldly Skype calls?”

“Yeah. We could just use whatever they did. ‘S’not like Spiritus will attack us. All we gotta do is ask. It’ll save us time. I’m sure of it.”

“Aw, yeah!” I gushed. I was so proud of him. “That’s my Noct!”

“Hey, I’m not your- whatever…”

I tried hugging him. He pushed me away.

“That may work,” Warrior said. “If Spiritus will let us.”

Garland jumped down behind him. The ground shook under his weight. I squeaked and hid behind Cecil, who just laughed. Garland watched me. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking. Noct protested at my choice of protection.

“He is not so single-minded as to let a petty feud cloud his better judgment,” Garland reasoned.

“Then our next destination has been decided.”

The two nodded at each other. How amicable. If only all villains and heroes could something like that. Joining together against a common cause is always a great way to bring people together. Even if they usually hate each other.

Another glistening portal opened up. Garland led us all to it. I trailed behind Noctis, who was speaking to Cecil.

“That was an ingenious solution, Noctis,” Cecil complimented.

“Ah, no problem,” my brother said. “Just one thing.”

We stopped. The ground beneath my feet felt weird. I shifted to get better footing. It was all wobbly.

“How ‘bout you call me Noct instead?”

“Aww…” I cooed softly so only Noct could hear. He glared at me and then looked down. His eyes widened.

“_______, wait-!”

“What-?”

I fell through the portal under my feet.

 

“Ah… My head…”

The portal dropped me over a dusty, desert-like setting. I fell a few feet and almost landed on my neck. I flopped over onto my stomach to hoist myself up. The portal closed. I stood up straight.

“Noct?!” I called. No answer. “Noct!”

_Oh god where am I?_

My eyes searched frantically around for any sign of my friends. I turned wildly in circles. Once I had a good glimpse of the terrain, I stopped. This place looked familiar.

_Is this…_

“...where I fell?” I breathed. I spotted the same rocky structures in the distance. They arched up over the landscape. A couple shacks blotted the ground some ways away. Heat beat down on me. I was glad I had taken my jacket off. The weather on Eos was merciless.

Wait. If I’m back on Eos, then that means the others are somewhere around here, too, right? I just have to find those Oracle Runes for a start. If this was where I first fell, then they’d be somewhere nearby. My body twisted to see a cliff face behind me. The white smoke the runes emitted rose up from that direction. I set out for it.

When I reached the campsite, a person with long, brown hair could be seen standing atop it. I sapped up some fire energy from some elemental stones. My eyes caught a glimpse of the person. Excitement starting my heart anew, I dashed up the slope.

“Gladio!” I shouted. Finally, I was back. A sigh of great relief left me. “Gladio, you’ll never guess- you won’t _believe_ what just happened to Noct and me: we were just in this other _world_ and there were people there - people like _us_ \- and we had no idea what was going on and he thought you were playing a trick on him- …You’re… not Gladio.”

The guy we had fought earlier - the really attractive one who kissed my hand - had pivoted around as I rambled. I froze in shock. My heart began fluttering for an entirely different reason. My eyebrows furrowed. I looked back out at the land around us.

“I could’ve sworn…”

I slumped with an inaudible sob.

_No no no no you cannot break down. Not again. Now is not the time. There are things to be done and Spirituses to talk to- Right. Noct. Gotta find Noct._

“Hey, look,” I said, sighing, “I’m not here for a fight. I just wanna get Noctis and then go home. And by that I mean get back to Eos and maybe then go home.”

“Ah,” he said, “and here I thought we pawns would fight for our freedom yet again.”

_That **voice.** I could listen to it all day._

“I’m not a-!” I started angrily. Then I stopped and sighed again. My eyes were trained on the ground. “I wish I could say that and actually mean it.”

He stepped closer and into my vision. I shyly peered up. And promptly gulped. Dammit, who gave him the right to be so attractive?

“I take it you’d rather not bend to the gods’ wills, either?” he inquired.

_Either…?_

I leaned to the side, trying to find a way to explain, and shrugged.

“It’s a long story,” I summarized. He nodded. “I, um… Ah… I don’t think I, um…”

I scratched at my arm awkwardly. He waited patiently. I looked away to be able to speak properly.

“I don’t think I got your name earlier.”

He smiled and my heart nearly stopped.

“Vayne Solidor,” he said with a small bow. “And I believe your name is ______, yes?”

“Yep.”

“It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

“Uh, same. I guess.”

_Why is everyone in this world amused with my personality?_

He gazed out at the surrounding desert grassland. I followed where he was looking.

“I don’t think this is one of my memories,” he said. My head tilted to the side. I looked the same way.

“It’s, uh,” I stuttered. “It’s mine. I think. Or Noct’s. Or maybe both of ours? Hmm…”

“It reminds me of the outskirts of Rabanastre.”

“Of what?”

“Rabanastre - it is the Crown City of Dalmasca.”

“Oh.”

I spun around to look in the distance beyond Hammerhead. That was the direction Ignis drove us to Lucis’ Crown City. So that must mean…

“I actually think Insomnia’s that way,” I told myself. Oh, right, there’s a person with me. “I mean, I don’t really know. I’m not from this world, exactly.”

“Ah, yes, the ‘outlier who should not have been counted.’ Quite fitting.”

“Thanks.”

I looked up at the sky beyond the campsite and pointed.

“I fell from there.”

Vayne’s eyes followed the way I was pointing.

“You fell from the _sky?”_ he asked, bewildered.

“Yep. I’m really lucky Noct and his friends managed to catch me. And that they were there at all.”

A portal opened beside us. I glared at it. Stupid Materia and her stupid orders. I was so close to ignoring her and just working to find a way home. My new companion gestured to the cosmic opening.

“Shall we?” he said. I continued glaring at it.

“I’m inclined to stay here,” I gritted. “Materia didn’t want me here.”

The uncomfortable feeling of everyone back in her tower turning to stare at me resurfaced. I didn’t want to go back to that. Cecil and Warrior were nice, but everyone else scared me. What if they didn’t want me there either? I certainly wouldn’t want me there. I could hardly even contribute!

“I’m afraid we don’t have much choice,” Vayne said. “And your brother is waiting for you, is he not?”

Determination took over. Right. I had to get back to Noctis. He could survive without me, but… I could only imagine how worried he must’ve been. It wasn’t a happy thought. So I nodded. Then Vayne nodded toward the portal. I blinked. He waited. I sighed.

_Fine, I’ll go first._

 

“Oh please not again.”

When I stepped through, familiar ruins filled the new space. Their square-based architecture was all too well known to me now. Noct and I had spent many hours in here trying to get out. The people of Solheim were too smart for their own good.

“Any idea as to where we might be?” Vayne asked when the portal closed. My eye twitched.

“Costlemark Tower,” I said, irritated. “Noct and I were literally just here.”

We were in the cube puzzle room. The ceiling stretched up and up and up. The staircase that should lead to the entrance was blocked off half way up. Cool air caused me to shiver. I slipped my jacket back on. The tiny lights etched into the stone didn’t do much for our vision. I lit a small flame in my hands. Vayne had to step close in order to see.

“Interesting…” was all he said. His close proximity was giving me heart palpitations and a case of the nervous stiffness. I had only known him for maybe forth-five minutes and I already had a crush. I’m pretty sure he knew it, too. He didn’t say anything, but the way he held himself said it all.

“This might be a weird question, but… can you use magic? Or at least hold it?”

He eyed me questioningly. “A bit, yes. Why?”

“Here.”

I conjured up another flame and gave it to him. It pulsed happily in the hands of another magic user. We looked around the room again. I glared at all the points Noct and I had to solve the puzzle. They were in each corner of the room. I really wished we wouldn’t have to solve it again.

“You were just here, you said?” Vayne repeated what I told him.

“Yeah,” I nodded. “Noct and I got locked down here after accidentally setting off a trap. It was just the two of us versus a whole bunch of daemons. And then we almost died. Er, well, _I_ almost died. Twice.”

“Hmm… And what exactly _is_ this place?”

“I… don’t know, actually. What it’s for, that is. It’s an ancient tower from Solheim. We’re underground, though. The top looks like the Colosseum back in my world. Gotta love those arches.”

“You enjoy architecture?”

“Yep, yep! Just ask Noct. He and Prompto couldn’t keep up with me. They gave up halfway through my happy bouncing between rooms and columns.”

“Then it appears we have something in common.”

I looked over at him, eyes sparkling.

 _“Nice,”_ I emphasized. I went to the stairs to sit down. Before I reached them, a flashback of waking up next to Noct played out as I reached it. It was… trippy seeing myself outside my body again.

“How sweet.” Vayne was _right_ behind me. I jumped, a warm shiver running up my spine. “But you’re not actually related, are you?”

“N-no- nope. Just have that sibling bond.”

I found a spot to sit on the staircase. Another memory played. This one of me and Noctis arguing over the puzzle and how solve it.

 

_“I thought you said left!”_

_“We already did that one!”_

_“No we didn’t! It went right instead of forward.”_

_“But the last one did the same thing.”_

_“No it didn’t!”_

_“Yes it did!”_

_“No it didn’t!”_

_“Yes it did.”_

_Then…_

_“I don’t think this is going to work.”_

_“Shh… I’m thinking.”_

_“Seriously, Noctis, it couldn’t be left three times in a row. How do you even know where we’re going? Everything looks the same!”_

_“Just… hold on a sec.”_

_“We’ve been at this for hours. Can we please take a break?”_

_“Will you shut up for a second and let me figure this out?”_

_“Fine. I’ll be over there watching and judging every move you make.”_

 

“This is trippy…” I muttered, now sitting. The flame in my hand sparked up with slight embarrassment, the flames tinged green. Vayne came to sit next to me.

“It almost reminds me of my own brothers,” he said wistfully.

“You have brothers?”

“Had. They were… …They were killed. Now all I have left is the youngest of us.”

“Oh. I’m… I’m sorry.”

He didn’t say anything. Both our flames died down to deep reds with hints of orange. I wondered what we were doing here. Why did this world bring both of us _here?_ What did Costlemark Tower have to show us? I had literally just been here. Was I supposed to reflect on it?

The image of me and Noct on the stairs some floors up arranged itself in the space before us.

 

_“Yeah, I’m alright,” I muttered. “Like I told Ignis, it happened so fast I didn’t really give myself a chance to protest. You’re my friends, and… well, you’re the only friends I have right now. And I care about you. I get attached really quickly, I know. I don’t mean to. But… I was scared you’d get hurt. I just couldn’t let that happen.”_

_Noctis sighed. “Yeah, I know what you mean. Just… You know you don’t have to take full responsibility for us, right? I know you’re grateful, and that’s nice to hear. But… You don’t owe us anything. You’re our friend, too.”_

_And that’s how friendship works, he meant. I could hear it in his tone. Noctis didn’t seem to be the best with expressing his emotions. I could tell he was really trying. A smile came upon my lips._

_“Yeah, I know,” I said. “It’s a nice thought. I’m really glad for it.”_

_“It’s… weird,” he sighed. “We haven’t known you that long, but…”_

_He paused again. Something clattered nearby and faded._

_“It feels like… I’ve known you forever, I guess.”_

 

“Hey, memory bubble, these are private,” I called out. I crossed my arms and leaned on them.

“Perhaps it’s trying to tell you something,” my companion said next to me.

“Yeah, but what? We just had that conversation…”

“If I may…”

“Sure, go ahead.”

“I feel it is reiterating exactly what he told me before we arrived here. However, it is from a different perspective. It may very well be that he believes he is under obligation to you. I don’t know what it is that he lost, and I won’t pretend to, but be that as it may, he understands how you feel. You’ve both lost something precious and are both working much too hard to prove to the other that he or she has your support.”

_Oh. Well. Thanks, Vayne, you just tore my heart in half._

_Noctis, I’m coming._

I was speechless. It made so much sense now. Why Noct had been so passionate in his reply to Vayne’s question earlier. Why he reacted the way he did whenever I told him how grateful I was. He felt the same way, but didn’t know how to say it. Perhaps he felt that since I had been stuck on Eos for so long now that he was under some obligation to help me get back home. But that wasn’t his responsibility. The gods were the ones who put me there in the first place.

The gods. Ugh. So entitled. I really didn’t like Materia. Shiva seemed cool, though, pun very much intended. She had given me ice powers. That made up for a lot of my stress.

“Thank you,” I whispered.

“Of course. I am always happy to be of assistance.”

“But what about you?”

He looked confused.

“Is this the only reason you’re here? Or is there some inner turmoil burning within you, too?”

“There is inner turmoil in all of us, I think.”

_Way to dodge the question._

“I wouldn’t suppose there is anything bothering me. I merely wish to return home to Ivalice so I may carry out the remainder of the plan I have concocted.”

“...Can I ask what kind of plan it is?”

“One of possible sacrilege, as it were, as well as one to bring more power to the Archadian Empire and glory to House Solidor.”

_Oh so he’s one of THOSE guys. The “all I want is power” guys. At least he’s pretty._

“Well, why do you want power so much?” I asked. “Is it worth a possible Pyrrhic victory?”

“The gods think they can rule us. I aim to free us from their grasp. We won’t be their _toys any longer. History is made by man alone.”_

“Alright. That’s fair. The empire on Eos is also on a quest to destroy the gods. Except… Noct kinda needs their blessings to become king so… I don’t know… They took me from my home and thought I’d be fine, I guess. I don’t really… know how to feel about that. At least you’re trying to do something about it.”

“It is most perverted that you should require the gods’ _approval_ to make history.”

Sighing, I nodded in defeat.

“Yeah,” I said almost hopelessly. “I admire your initiative, though. I don’t think I’d be able to do that without being blasted into oblivion.”

“And here, there _is_ no civilization. Only two gods who suppose they can mold us to their whim.”

“I know, right? There’s- If there’s no one here, then what’s the point? Nothing’s going to happen but endless conflict.”

“Would that I had the time to correct it.”

“Correct it…?”

My eyes flitted back to him. Vayne seemed rather frustrated. His eyes had narrowed and he stared very intently at the ground.

“As you stated, there is no point to a world without history,” he said. “There is no purpose it serves to benefit any people.”

“So… what,” I responded, “would you just destroy it?”

“Yes. It is most reasonable, especially if it proves a threat to Archadia, and the rest of Ivalice.”

“Hmm…”

_Is that… really the right thing to do…?_

_He’s got a point. And you said it first: what’s the point of this world if there’s nothing here?_

I managed to look him in the eye.

“Well… As dramatic as that is,” I said, swallowing, “there’s nothing I can find to counter that, I guess. I’ve never destroyed a world before, so… Sounds fun in theory. I’d join you if I could. Just… be careful, okay? I’m sure your brother wouldn’t want anything to happen to you.”

I received a small, slightly awkward, heart fluttering grin, rare from him. Perhaps people didn’t often agree with him. I also became aware of how close he was. These stairs were kind of narrow. We were almost touching.

_His eyes are really green._

_So green._

_So pretty._

_You should kiss him._

_Wait, WHAT?!_

He opened his mouth to speak. A portal interrupted him. I glared at it. These portals were cool and all, but they had horrible timing.

“I suppose that is our cue to continue on,” he said instead of whatever he was going to tell me. He stood. I stayed on the stairs, disappointed. He held out a gloved hand. I took it.

“Thanks,” I muttered when he helped me up. He nodded.

We walked through the portal together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :DD


	25. Reunited And It Feels So Good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something is revealed...

“_______!”

“Noct!”

Without paying attention to my surroundings, I took off the moment I saw and heard my brother. I ended up slipping. Thankfully, someone caught me before I hit the ground.

“You really should be more careful,” Vayne said, helping me correct myself. My whole face felt warm from feeling his arms around me briefly. Noctis reached us quickly. Warrior and Cecil were right behind him.

I hugged Noct upon our meeting. He returned it without thinking. Neither of us let go for a moment.

“I was so worried,” he breathed. “Where the hell were you?!”

“Volume,” my voice cracked as I protested. I stepped away. “Back near Hammerhead and then Costlemark Tower.”

“More memory portals, I take it,” Cecil said. Vayne and I nodded. Noctis noticed him.

 _“You,”_ he seethed. “What’s the big idea-?”

“Noct, it wasn’t him,” I stepped in front of my new friend. “This world likes its portals and we’ve already established that Materia hates me.”

“I don’t think she _hates_ you,” Warrior assured me. I looked at him.

“I’m pretty sure she does. And trust me, the feeling is mutual.”

“Why did it show you Costlemark?” Noct cut in. “Weren’t we just there?”

I exchanged a glance with Vayne.

“Reasons,” I said shortly. Noct shot me a deadpan expression. “Certain… revelations I may or may not talk to you about later.”

Noctis sighed and said, “Fine, have it your way. Come on. We were just about to talk to Spiritus about the video call thing.”

“Right.”

“It’s good to see you’re alright,” Cecil said. We began walking up the slope to Spiritus’ dome. Garland led the way with Warrior right after him.

“Noctis was worried sick,” Warrior told me.

“Thanks,” I said, “and I’m not surprised.”

I halted and turned around. Vayne was standing where we had come out from the portal, lost in thought.

“Hey,” I called out. He looked up. “Wanna come with us?”

After a moment, he walked forward.

“I see no reason not to,” he said. I smiled. Noctis rolled his eyes. I zapped him with the smallest bit of lightning.

“Stop that!” he protested. I just laughed.

We continued our way up the slope. The red glare from the rest of the tower sent me into a haze of uneasiness. It was really warm. My jacket and shirt started sticking to me.

“So you were in Costlemark, right?” Noct asked. Vayne and I nodded. “Please don’t tell me you almost died _again.”_

“Well they do say the third time’s the charm,” I gave Noct double finger guns. He wasn’t amused. “No. I’m fine, really. Nothing attacked us.”

“Then what were you doing?”

“Having meaningful conversations, unlike this one.”

Someone chuckled next to me.

“And how did you elude death before?” Vayne asked. Cecil looked back, slightly concerned but also curious.

“Hi-elixir the first time,” I explained. “I’ve got scars now, though. The second time I was launched across a room by that jabberwock I told you guys about earlier. Hit the control room wall. It hurt. Noct killed the thing - very impressively, I might add - and helped me back to camp.”

“Why bring the small one with you?” I heard Garland ask. “If she can hardly protect herself?”

“I’m not _that_ small…”

“I don’t believe Noct will let her out of his sight,” Cecil explained. “Thus is the way of the older brother. In a situation like this, at least.”

“We’re the same age.”

“Still.”

“And Materia has already questioned her being here,” Warrior said. “It was an accident.”

“Just my luck…” I muttered.

“But I think you’ve proven your worth.”

Heat warmed my cheeks. My gaze fixed on the ground. “Thanks…”

We reached the dome. Cecil and Warrior revealed what we had discovered earlier concerning the world destroyer. We’d all have to work together to prevent this realm’s destruction. Spiritus seemed much more reasonable than Materia (don’t tell her I said that). He allowed us to contact her to share the news. However, before he got the interdimensional Skype call going, it opened up in front of us from other end. We turned and stared in surprise.

“Don’t waste the last drops of our precious time gawking,” a higher pitched female voice said, “the situation demands we begin talking!”

I blinked twice. That was definitely not Materia. Nice rhyme, whoever you are.

“Gawking?” Warrior turned to Noct. “Was I gawking?”

I shrugged.

“What’re you asking me for?” Noctis shot back.

“Do you mean to turn my champions against me?” Materia demanded. I desperately wanted to say yes. I remained quiet.

“Save your quarrelsome posturing for another time, Materia,” Spiritus retorted, slamming his sword into the ground.

“Can anyone in this place speak normally for once please?” I muttered. The goddess’ furious eyes landed on me.

“Or was it you who swayed them?” she asked. I stepped back in shock.

“What?!” I exclaimed. Electricity crackled around us. “The hell kind of claim is that?”

“You were not supposed to be here.”

“Might I remind you that was _your_ fault!”

Lightning cracked in front of the screen. My fingers twitched.

“We don’t have time for this,” Warrior interrupted.

“_______, you need to calm down,” Noct whispered.

“Calm down? You want me to calm down when she-?”

“Now is neither the time nor place to contend with divinity,” Vayne cut in. I met his gaze, sharp comment ready to fire. I stopped when I saw the accusatory patience in his eyes at what I might say. I looked away, the electric energy dissipating.

“Right,” I said reluctantly. One hand clutched at the other. “We can, uh, plan a hostile takeover later.”

He nodded approvingly.

“Remind me what you two were talking about earlier?” Noct asked, ever confused.

“Later.”

Spiritus looked to his left where an eccentrically dressed sorceress conjured a orb with the Jormangandr we had seen in it.

“As even fragments of the beast take this form,” she proclaimed, “our travails will persist until we kill it outright.”

The golden snake vanished. Materia looked surprised, like she had no idea what to do.

“Seems like wherever we go,” a voice from her end said, “there they are.”

The small rodent lady whose shadow I fought before hovered up into view.

“Our paths home are blocked as long as it draws breath,” she said.

“What?” I gasped.

“Another reason it deserves a quick death.”

“Did you know of this, Spiritus?” Materia asked accusingly. “Did you stand idly by while the world’s lifeblood was siphoned away?”

I facepalmed as Spiritus explained that he knew as little as she did. He also reasoned that as they grow, so their world must grow with them.

_I’m on his side, if we ever have to take sides. He seems to have a brain._

“Very well,” Materia finally agreed. “Then I have a request: Warriors of distant worlds, lend us your strength and skill. Pull this world out from the mire of combat.”

A moment passed. Then Warrior came forward and stood before her. He drew his sword and held in front of him.

“The light…” he declared, “will always be with us!”

The weird Skype call ended.

“That was so cliche it hurt,” I muttered. Then I stared Noctis down, pretending to be serious. “Also, I think I’m starting to side with the empire, here, Noct.”

He looked comically betrayed, even holding a hand to his heart.

“And here I thought I could trust you,” he said, catching on to my joke. I smiled.

“Guess I’ll have to join Ardyn then.”

He laughed. “Imagine that. Chancellor’s assistant.”

That gained chuckles from everyone around us. A portal opened up at the bottom of the tower, Spiritus told us. We’d have to walk down to enter it. So our little quartet headed back down the slope. Vayne followed behind. I guess he didn’t have anything better to do.

The portal was a ways away from the tower, maybe a hundred feet. Not too far in hindsight, but we were attacked halfway by three more shadow people. They were tall and intimidating and I bumped into Vayne trying to hurriedly backtrack.

“Hey,” Noctis called out at him. “Vayne, right? If you want something to fight for, protect my sister!”

He warped away to clash with a guy who looked like a ripoff of Garland. I bristled silently.

“I’d protest that I don’t need protection,” I growled, to myself mostly, “but then I’d be lying.”

Noctis summoned his armiger with a bright flash. The streaks of blue almost clouded my vision.

“Show off!”

I then noticed Vayne had a similar weapon. A group of swords circled him. They darted out at any foes who got too close. His expression was that of calm pride.

“This is Sephira,” he introduced, “the divine sword.”

I eyed him up and down. Was he joking? Or was he serious?

“Isn’t that the name of the dragon from Eragon?” I questioned. We stared at each other in blank confusion for a moment. “Nevermind. That’s cool.”

I summoned Ithilcalad when one enemy got a little too close. I noticed my friend’s interest in the weapon, probably because it appeared out of thin air.

“Noct’s family’s magic lets him do that. He can lend it out to other people. Not the warping, though. I really wish I could do that. This is Ithilcalad, by the way. Elvish for ‘moon fire’.”

“...Elvish, as in the _Lord of the Rings?”_

My heart _jumped._ I jerked to face him excitedly.

“You know the Lord of the Rings?” I asked eagerly. I bounced energetically on my feet. Vayne nodded. The biggest smile appeared on my lips.

_Hug him hug him hug him hug him hug him_

I kept my hands to myself.

“You should _really_ see Eos, then!” I told him. “It’s like a- like a… It’s like a modern Middle-earth!”

That caught his interest. I explained the ruins that dotted Lucis’ landscape, the mines we had gone through (like Moria’s), the glaives of kings Noct collected like Aragorn, and of course, the pictures I had seen of Insomnia’s Citadel (for Gondor). The battle ended as I mentioned the Rock of Ravatogh being like Mount Doom. Noctis and friends hauled themselves over to us.

The fight had been a tough one. The shadows were getting stronger, it seemed. The three who had fought were worn out. Noctis was the worst off again. Before he could say no, I was already going around and healing everyone. My coughs hadn’t followed me here. I deemed it safe.

Oh how wrong I was.

The moment my finger booped Noctis’ nose, the pain welled up in my chest. I tried to keep it down. And failed. I began hacking up air like a quick lumberjack who couldn’t get the tree to fall down. It hurt. The sharp pain pierced my chest and small parts of my abdomen. My hand came to grasp at my throat. I couldn’t stand. I couldn’t _breathe._ Noctis followed me to the ground as I knelt.

“What’s going on?” Cecil was asking. Warrior also looked extremely concerned. Vayne watched with scrutinising eyes.

“I have no idea!” Noctis said frantically. “This has happened before, but- oh gods- Does anyone have some water?”

Something splattered on the ground. Blood was coming out again. I began to panic. What little breath I could draw picked up its pace.

_No no no not here. Not in front of your new friends. They’ll hate you. They’ll think you’re looking for attention._

_I am DYING._

_Oh god I’m dying. I dying. I don’t want to die!_

“Get her inside the tower,” Vayne instructed.

“What?” Warrior questioned.

“Help her to Spiritus’ tower. Now.”

Noctis helped me to stand. He and Cecil supported my pitiful limp to the tower Spiritus resided in. It was funny, really. The moment my foot stepped into the threshold, the pain ceased. My coughs became gasps for air. They lowered me down to lean against the wall along the slope. I began to calm down. Noctis stayed with me.

“How did you know?” Cecil asked Vayne.

“It was simple, really,” he answered. “She did not take ill when first we met. The influence of the dark seems to counteract it.”

“Wait,” Noct said as I breathed normally again. His eyes narrowed. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

Vayne shook his head slightly. He met my gaze.

“You are from a world different than the rest of ours, yes?” he asked. I nodded. “And does this world possess magic?”

I shook my head.

“She was blessed by the gods,” Noctis explained. “When she got here- I mean, there. To Eos. Like my family, but a bit different. Said there’s no magic where she’s from. Just science.”

“Ah…” Vayne said. “Then I believe I see the problem.”

“You think they overdid it,” Cecil observed.

“What?” Noctis asked. “There’s no way…”

“Too much light can cause harm,” Warrior said. “Even I know that. There needs to be a balance. It’s why she can heal the way she does. There’s no even amount.”

“Exactly,” Vayne concluded. “And therefore, a bit of darkness is needed reach a stable threshold. It would also explain the amount of power she possesses to be able to summon a storm from sheer anger.”

“So they just zapped her with energy and said ‘go nuts’?” Noctis said. “Are they crazy?”

“In many cases, yes. Or desperate. Or power-consumed. Perhaps all three at once. It can be difficult to tell, but the black magic she can use is her soul’s way of making up for the lack of the dark.”

“And how do you know all this?” Warrior asked.

“I have a spent a reasonable amount of time in my life studying the gods and certain magical… _conditions_ that have led to such a conclusion in their analogy.”

My limbs felt heavy. My eyelids drooped. All I wanted was to sleep. Was that too much to ask?

“I understand you must return to Materia. Noctis, you may remain here with her if you so wish. But if not, I will permit you to leave her in my care.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Headcanon that LOTR exists in Ivalice. Fight me.


	26. Consul et medica

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Progress and conversation lead to friendship.

Noctis had left with Warrior and Cecil. He didn’t want to, but the already straining alliance between Materia and Spiritus deemed it the wiser choice. I walked the line between light and dark. Noct was strictly light. Thus, I remained sitting at the bottom of the tower for who knows how long.

My throat hurt. No one had any water so I toughed it out. Vayne had gone back up with Garland a while ago. I hoped he’d come back, but I didn’t count on it. We both had a lot on our minds. So, I sat against the tower wall, arms around my knees. Thoughts swam around like whirlpools in my head. There was no wading through them. I’d have to dive in head first.

Footsteps came from the right. I didn’t look up.

“I see you’re still here,” Vayne said. I glanced up at him.

“Yep,” I answered quietly. I didn’t know what else to say.

“You are welcome at the top, if you wish to come.”

“Maybe. Thanks.”

He kept standing and leaned back on the wall next to me. Neither of us spoke for a good few moments.

“Do…” I licked my lips. “Do you really think I’ve got too much light, or whatever?”

He nodded. “It is the most logical conclusion I could come to. Is it bothering you?”

“...Yeah. I just… It changes things.”

“How so?”

“...How I see everything that’s happened. I… I don’t really wanna bother you with all this, though…”

He thought for a second. Then he walked to the slope leading up.

“Come,” he invited, reaching out to me and curling his fingers. I reluctantly stood and followed him. “I will give you until we reach the dome to speak your mind.”

We began.

“Um,” I hummed, thinking. “Well… Like I said, my home world doesn’t have magic. It’s heard of and fantasized, but actually using it is a whole other concept. And I… I don’t know. I just can’t stop thinking about what’s going to happen now and what other people will think of me and… Stuff like that…”

“You do worry an awful lot about trivial things, don’t you?”

I looked up at him.

“Have you never heard of anxiety?” I quipped. He nodded. “It’s not exactly something I can turn off.”

“I am aware,” he said. “And I hold nothing against you.”

“It’s just… Back home, we have multiple religions. I mean, there are different religions you can choose to follow, not at the same time. Some are really similar, and some are polar opposites. My own family is averagely religious, I guess. I’m… still figuring things out, myself, so… Being dropped into a world I’ve never heard of before and being told gods did it just… Overwhelmed me, I guess. Heck, I’ve practically met two of them and… I don’t know.”

I sighed.

“Noct is going around collecting their blessings. I guess I assumed that to mean they’re good gods, right? They’re working with the king of one of the nations. But now I learn they messed with… with _me._ I never asked for this to happen, and while I think everyone at some point wishes to be able to use magic… I didn’t mean like _this._ I didn’t even get a warning. I went to bed one night and suddenly I was falling.”

“They took you without your _consent?”_

“Yeah, exactly. So… basically I’m just confused as to what I’m supposed to be feeling. And Materia isn’t helping. The moment she noticed I was here, she literally told me I wasn’t supposed to be here but then wouldn’t let me go home. Er, back to Eos.”

I sighed again.

“I see…” Vayne said. “I certainly understand your frustration. And being taken from a place you love dearly… The notion of being taken from Ivalice for longer than we’ve been in this desolate space sits bitterly in my thoughts.”

“I still have no idea what the Astrals want from me. Noct was taking me to see the Oracle but it’s taking so damn long… The ferry from Altissia never came, so now we have to get our own boat. But hey, I definitely understand your perspective on things. Maybe even agree with it, almost.”

I whispered the last sentence quietly. Did he hear it? If he did, he said nothing.

“Ah, there’s the little healer,” Spiritus said as we reached the dome. “Good of you to have retrieved her, Vayne.”

“Of course,” my new friend responded.

“What a teensie-weensie little thing!” A loud voice said behind me. I gasped and moved closer toward Vayne, hiding. A man dressed like a clown had been hovering right behind me. Something told me to not interact with him. “Perhaps we could make fun use of her~!”

“I’m afraid not,” Vayne countered. “She is under my protection.”

“Protection?” the almost completely bare lady from earlier (with the image of the golden snake) scoffed. “What protection could a power-hungry consul offer?”

The misty atmosphere around her had me on higher alert.

“Clearly you have never seen the man fight!” Garland bellowed. It was nice to see someone familiar, but that didn’t mean I’d go near him.

“And what of the girl?” A tall man with long white hair stepped out from the shadows. He carried a long sword - or was it a katana? I gulped.

_Oh Lord help me. There’s too many attractive people here._

“She and Materia do not get along,” Spiritus claimed. “So I have allowed her to stay here.”

“So she belongs to the light?”

“She walks the line, Sephiroth, between light and dark. She is the gray area in the middle.”

_Sephiroth…? Have I heard that name somewhere?_

“Whose side is she on?” someone else asked.

“There are no sides. We must all work together to bring this world from the brink of destruction.”

“Yes, but we are to fight those of the light, are we not?” Sephiroth asked.

“Then she will mostly likely fight on the side of her brother,” Vayne answered.

“Then what is she still doing here, hmm~?” the clown man inquired playfully. He lied horizontally in the air and gestured to Vayne. “Spending time with Boyfriend here, perchance?”

“He- He’s not my-” I stuttered. Vayne shook his head in disbelief. “I- We’re not- Um…”

“How shy she is…” Another woman entered the dome. She looked like an evil sorceress. “How cute…”

Everyone was starting to surround us. Panic set in. My body subconsciously inched closer to Vayne’s. The room dropped a few degrees. I shouldn’t have stayed here. I should have gone with Noctis. Why did I accept the offer of going? I could handle some coughs!

A hand rested on my shoulder. I flinched.

“Had you seen the girl’s powers,” Vayne intervened, “you would know not to provoke her - in _any_ way.”

“Then why doesn’t she show us, then?” Garland demanded. “She fought naught when I arrived in the memory of Cornelia.”

Frost began to fan out from my feet. No one seemed to notice yet. My hands were freezing. I rubbed them together, softly wringing them.

“Go on, then!” a guy with lavender hair and some floating orbs around him said. “Why don’t you give us a show?”

“Please…” I whispered. “I can’t…”

“Can you not see the uncomfortability?” Vayne argued.

“It would fare interestingly to see what both light and dark can do,” Sephiroth chipped in. Suddenly the hair on the back of my neck stood up. Someone lifted a lock and sniffed. It was not Vayne, I knew that. I jumped forward, whipping around. A chunk of ice shot out from the ground as I saw the clown guy laughing. I didn’t even realize my hand was outstretched. It retracted awkwardly. Vayne sighed.

“Her magic is in tune with her emotions,” he explained. “As I said, it would be best not to bother her, especially while I am around.”

The glare he sent Clown Guy had everyone in the room rethink their actions. I don’t think I’ve ever seen such coldness before.

“Hmm…” Sephiroth said behind me. I turned around again. “She could be useful.”

“She’s a healer, you said?” the sorceress asked. I stepped back. “Perhaps she could provide aid to the whole battlefield.”

Vayne thought it over. I waited for his answer. He knew more about this light-dark balance thing than me. Finally he met my gaze.

“You would have to stay close to one of us,” he said. “If the coughing begins again, we should be able to keep it at bay.”

“Okay,” I said in a small voice. “I can do that.”

A few people continued to watch me curiously, but most of them went back to their own business. I found a secluded spot in the back and slid down the wall to sit. Then I frosted the floor around me over. The heat from the tower was starting to get to me.

There was nothing to do. Some of the villains had gone somewhere to spar for the final showdown. Spiritus remained in his spot near the middle of the dome. Vayne observed everything, occasionally talking to anyone who approached him. He’d glance over at me sometimes. I started to wonder if maybe I reminded him of his brother.

After maybe thirty minutes of daydreaming and picking at Ithilcalad, the purple haired man from earlier came over.

“_______, right?” He asked. I nodded slowly. “Quite the impressive array of magic you possess.”

“Uh, thanks?” I said, confused. What did he want? The three orbs around him twirled and spun.

“Would you like to rehearse with me?”

“Re- what?”

“Practice.”

_This guy must like theater or something._

I thought it over. I had nothing else to do. Maybe if the people saw what little I could do, they’d leave me alone. So I agreed. The man of theatrics - Kuja, he said was called - led me and an ever-masked Vayne down to the outskirts of the tower where a few people were still sparring.

Sephiroth was there. So was Garland. I did my best ignore their glances as we found an open spot. Kuja’s elemental orbs spun around him eagerly. I summoned Ithilcalad and awkwardly stood in place.

_Okay… Now what?_

“Why don’t you take the first move?” my new acquaintance offered.

“Uh…” I thought for a second. “Just like that? No rules or anything?”

“None whatsoever~! And don’t worry - I won’t go easy on you.”

I shrugged to seem indifferent. Deep down, I was panicking. I had no idea how to start with an actual person. The wild life on Eos usually attacked first. So what do I do?

Ithilcalad dissipated. I raised my dominant hand, fingers curling. The air dropped about ten degrees. Vayne watched with interest now that he had a proper spectator view. Snowflakes were sputtering around me. I stayed that way for a while, just to fake them out.

“Is that it?” I heard someone mutter loudly. I smirked.

“Surely she can do better,” another person said. My hand jerked. Its fingers tightened into a fist. Suddenly, with a burst of cold wind, frost and snow covered the ground within a fifty foot radius. I relished in the cold. It soothed me, made me feel more confident, more refreshed. With a flash of flames blooming in front of me for intimidation, I lunged at Kuja, sword back in hand.

“Not bad,” he commented. “But practice makes perfect.”

He launched a series of magic attacks at me. I managed to dodge most of them. Instead of taking damage from the lightning, however, I reached out and absorbed it. That got me a few more whispers from the now surrounding spectators. My hand spat the electricity right back out at Kuja. He just smirked and darted away. I aimed carefully, taking just a bit too long.

The feeling of being on fire was not welcome. I was _burning._ Every inch of me felt uncomfortably hot. I made a split second decision and frosted myself over. The coolness washed away my fears. I dashed to where Kuja was watching amusedly. Ithilcalad swung three times, each having a different element attached to the blade. Then my legs carried me away as his magic prepared another attack.

It was soon a battle of physically manifested wits. The manner in which we executed our attacks was almost like a game of Rock, Paper, Scissors. When Kuja shot lightning at me, I sent it back. When I launched a fireball at him, he hit me with ice. However, the longer we continued, the more elegant and complex his attacks became. Mine were the same things repeated over and over. So I began to frantically search for more ideas.

I don’t know how it happened. Kuja was winning, and my health was getting low. My whole body screamed at me to rest, my arms and legs aching. The blasts of fire and ice and lightning sent me into a panic. The magic fizzing in my fingers was tainted with dark spots. One moment I was conjuring up a snowstorm, the next?

An explosion of black matter burst forth from my body, sending my opponent reeling back. Ithilcalad lit up with inverted light. The darkness seeped through the ground and into my body. Everyone had looks of shock on their faces. With two slashes, Kuja was nearly incapacitated. We were both exhausted.

He won, technically. I fell to my knees after that breathtaking display. Vayne came briskly walking. He knelt down to inspect me. Kuja also hurried over.

“Impressive,” he said. “For a beginner, at the least.”

“As I thought,” Vayne muttered to himself. “Infused light into a body unused to such effects… causes darkness to be harnessed from it and _from_ those around it.”

I met his gaze unsteadily.

“Come now. You’ve exhausted yourself, and I’d rather not have your brother out for my blood should something happen to you.”

I nodded wearily.

“And to think you didn’t fight when you should have!” Garland scolded me. “You’d make a fine addition to any one of our ranks, as a recruit.”

“Sure,” I agreed mindlessly. I just wanted to get somewhere no one (but Vayne or Noctis) could talk to me in.

“She’s a time bomb waiting to burst,” the sorceress said. “Or perhaps untapped potential. You should hand her over to someone who can make true use of her, consul.”

“And tarnish the name of my House?” Vayne protested arrogantly. “I think not. I promised her brother she’d be in my care, and rarely do I go back on my word.”

“Then I can see why she likes you.”

“Friend,” I muttered without thinking. “Good friend. Wants to fight gods, too.”

“Not quite what I meant, but I’ll save you the embarrassment. For now.”

Vayne just stared at me for a moment before guiding me back to the tower. I really wished another memory portal would open and lead to a warm bed. But nothing happened.

My heart was going wild in my chest. It wouldn’t stop beating at a rapid pace. I was starting to get worried. My breathing was mostly fine, but… was I getting sick or something?

“Vayne?” I asked.

“Yes?”

“What’s happening to me?”

“What do you mean?”

“Feels like… I just ran a marathon… But I don’t live in Greece…”

“I see… Your body is most likely adjusting to the presence of dark magic. Black magic, the elemental attacks you used to combat Kuja, is slightly different. Dark magic is much more powerful, and dangerous. Joined with the light, there’s no telling what wonders you can conjure… You may be one of the most powerful beings on this planet.”

I sighed childishly.

“Do I have to be?” I pouted. “I wanna just be me.”

“I don’t believe I said you couldn’t be.”


	27. The Land, the Cat, and the Roman Senator

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, a well-earned break.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :D more friends

I wasn’t sure how long we were going to spend time preparing. All I knew was that being back with Noctis and explaining everything that had happened in the short span of time I was gone was both made us both very confused and made Vayne very exasperated as we couldn’t quite comprehend what he was telling us.

“So… You're saying that… because she has too much light, she also has too much dark?” Noct reiterated for the millionth time.

“Yes,” Vayne said.

“But that doesn’t make any sense. I get there needs to be a balance, but where did the dark come from? You said it wasn’t the tower, so…”

Our friend sighed.

“It doesn’t necessarily come from _anywhere,”_ he said. “The universal laws of magic are simply doing their best to stabilize what they’ve been given.”

“So the universe is doing this to her?” Noctis asked.

“Not exactly…”

“But you said-”

 _“Yes,_ I am aware. As someone who possesses the darkness as well, it makes more sense to me than to those with the light. But I am _trying_ to tell you in the best way I can.”

Noctis lifted his hands in defeat.

“Alright,” he sighed. “I’ll just… ask Ignis when we get home.”

“Good plan,” I said.

“If that is all,” Vayne finalized, “then I shall be taking my leave.”

A portal opened behind him. He nodded to us respectfully.

“Wait, you’re leaving so soon?” I asked. “You, um… Mm…”

I couldn’t think of anything to say to keep him here.

“I shall await your arrival on the battlefield,” he said cordially. “I bid you farewell.”

My heart sank as the portal closed as quickly as it had gone, taking him with it. Noctis sighed yet again. He placed his hands on his hips.

“Well, might as well get back to the others,” he said. I nodded. We started on the short trip back to Materia’s tower. I wasn’t looking forward to seeing her again.

“What am I going to do, Noctis?” I asked woefully. “I don’t _want_ all this power. How do I get rid of it?”

“I dunno… We can ask Luna when we see her, okay?”

“Yeah… If that ever happens. At the pace we’re going, I’m not sure we will.”

“We will. I’m sure of it. Just trust me, okay?”

“Okay.”

Within moments of returning to the warriors of light, a few people crowded us instantly. Cecil and Warrior came to greet us. A small guy with a tail came bouncing over, too.

“Good to see you,” Cecil told me. Warrior nodded in agreement. “I hope you’re feeling better now.”

“Turns out she can use powers of the dark now,” Noctis said. “Not sure _why._ That Vayne guy tried explaining it to us, but I could hardly understand a word he said.”

“It’s a… complicated matter. As the dark knight, I understand your mixed feelings. I used to be mostly dark, but the light found its way to me and me to it. There isn’t much in the way of explaining its fundamentals. It is just something we have to come to accept with time.”

“Right…”

“I’m a _witch,”_ I joked. My raised hands crackled with lightning.

“Hey, Noctis,” the guy with the tail said. “Ready to go fishing?”

“Hell yeah!” Noct said excitedly. I stared at him.

“Are you serious?” I asked, deadpan. _“Now?”_

“Yep! Everyone’s decided to use one of the memory bubble places to gather strength.”

“There’s a nice place with a beach someone told us about,” Tail Boy said, “so that’s where we’re going!”

The beach was nice. Its memory wasn’t as warm as beaches usually are. That made me feel better, more relaxed. As Noct and his new friend (Zidane) went to find a good fishing spot, I trailed along the line where the sand made friends with grass. Soon I came to a nice, shady tree and sat down beneath it.

My head drooped to meet my chest. No longer could I control my eyelids. They fell closed. Before I let myself fall into a dreamless sleep, I slipped my jacket off to use as a pillow.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Someone was shaking me awake. I batted their hands away.

“Not now, Iris,” I muttered. She paused.

“Um, my name is Terra…”

I opened my eyes. A girl with long, tied back green hair was kneeling before me. Her clothes were rather odd - light greens and pinks. She reminded of the clown guy but much, much better.

“Oh…” I breathed, sitting up. I rubbed at my eyes and blinked the sleep away. “Uh, how long was I out?”

“I don’t know,” Terra said. “I saw you lying over here. When you didn’t move, I got worried…”

I blinked again. “Oh, uh, thanks, but I’m fine. I think. It’s been a really long day…”

“I’ll say! You’re the girl with the guy in black, right? What was his name… Nox?”

“Noctis, and yeah, I’m with him. I’m _______.”

“Well, it’s nice to meet you!”

“Uh, you, too, I guess.”

Instead of the awkward silence I expected, she giggled at my answer. I blinked once more. She turned to view the ocean behind her.

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” she said. I nodded. “All of our worlds seem so different yet so similar.”

“Yeah. It’s kinda weird, but… at least we’re not _completely_ unfamiliar with each other.”

Terra turned back to me and sat down properly, no longer crouching.

“I hope you don’t mind, but…” she began, “you looked kind of lonely over here…”

I smiled. “It’s all good. So, what kind of world are you from?”

She told me about the conflicts on her planet, the situation with its empire and the mastermind behind it. My eyes were open wide by the time she explained the esper thing.

“So they were able to control your mind?” I asked in disbelief. “And I guess those new powers just made you more of a target.”

Terra sighed. “Yeah… It was worth it, though. I think so, at least… I never want to go back to Kefka. And I don’t want anyone I care about getting hurt, either.”

“I get what you mean. And I bet those children’ll be really happy to see you again when it’s all over.”

That made her grin. She asked about my journeys, as well. My story was as wild as hers. By the time I reached Costlemark and Noct’s and my arrival to this strange world, both of us were comparing experiences and laughing at our friends’ antics. Then came the small exchanges that revealed so much. I summarized most of it, not sure if giving too much information was something Noct or I wanted.

“But Noctis,” I said, “he’s got so much on his shoulders. I just want to help him… But then Vayne suggest he feels the same about me…”

“I think it’s really sweet how close you two are after so short a time,” Terra said, leaning forward. “I know how it feels, almost. I just… wish I could feel it more…”

“It’ll come with time. Some friendships take a while to develop, others just click, y’know?”

“I suppose… The guys back in my world are pretty sweet, too. When did you get back to Noctis?”

I gave her a synopsis of Spiritus’ tower and how I almost hacked up a lung trying to heal everyone. Up until now, she had stayed quiet about my weird ability and its consequences.

“You really should be more careful! What would happen if you stopped breathing?”

“I… have no idea… But Vayne and Cecil were pretty quick to get it. Stepping back into the tower set me straight. And then I learned I also have the power of the dark…”

“That’s so strange. It’s… almost as if you don’t really belong to either.”

Our conversation caught the ears of a sensible person nearby. She inched closer to listen.

“A fine line between them, Vayne said,” I quoted. Terra sniggered.

“You seem to like _him_ an awful lot. Too bad he wasn’t summoned by Materia.”

Heat rose up my cheeks. I averted my eyes, staring at the sand.

“He’s… nice,” I said shortly, trying not to think too much of the handsome and eloquent politician. “And… I’d like to think I don’t belong to either Spiritus or Materia. Least of all the latter…”

“She does have a pretty quick temper. I’m glad you guys snapped out of it, though. That could’ve ended poorly.”

“Tell me about it. Good thing I was able to stay in the tower, weird as it was. This… crazy clown guy looked like he wanted to kidnap me or something. And then there’s Sephiroth… Something’s off about him…”

“Clown guy?” Terra groaned. “That must’ve been Kefka. He didn’t try to hurt you, did he?”

“No, but he sniffed my hair. I blasted some ice at him. Didn’t hit him, though.”

“Too bad.”

“Yep. Then this guy named Kuja asked to see more of my magic. That sparring session ended with me learning more about the darkness and generally being scared of my own strength.”

“You met Kuja?”

“Yep. You know him?”

She nodded. “He joined me and Zidane for a short while. He’s interesting, isn’t he? I hope I can talk to him again someday.”

“You seem to like him an awful lot.”

“Hey! Not like _that!”_

We laughed. Someone shifted in the corner of my eye. Then it widened as I saw the person standing near us. She - was it a she? - was wearing white. Her eyes were like a cat’s, she had ears like a cat’s, and there was also a tail. My face scrunched up in confusion.

“My apologies,” the person said. I deemed them female. “I didn’t mean to interrupt. I’m afraid I overheard your conversation on dark and light magical application.”

I blinked, still assessing her. Was she a cat? Or a person? Or both? Was she a… cat-person?

_Oh god the nekos are here. Hide the catnip!_

“It’s no problem!” Terra answered. “No one on our side seems to understand her situation all that well.”

“So it would seem,” Cat Girl said. “I must admit, I find it a fascinating case. Would you mind if I joined you?”

“Not all all! ______, is that okay with you?”

I was still lost in thought. Terra nudged me and I jumped.

“Oh! Sorry,” I said sheepishly. Cat Girl smiled slightly. “I, uh, hmm… Hi.”

“It’s quite alright,” she said, sitting down. We now made a small circle under the palm trees. “I’ve gotten used to the staring.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to! I just- Oh, there’s no way to end this without sounding… rude.”

“There are no Miqo’te in your world, I presume?”

“Mi- Uh, no. Sorry…”

“Interesting. It would seem that’s the case for most others here, as well.”

“Oh. Sorry, again…”

She smiled and introduced herself as Y’shtola. She asked about the magic in my world and I summarized my journey once more.

“That is most interesting,” she said, bringing a hand to her chin. “You come from a world where magic is but myth only to be given it in large proportions. No wonder it has such a toll on your health.”

“So… you think they overdid, too?” I asked. Perhaps Cecil was right.

“It would be hard to tell without seeing it firsthand. Do you think you could summon any of the magic right now?”

I lifted my dominant hand and tapped into the white magic rushing through me. From my fingers to my wrist, my arm was outlined with a faint turquoise. Both Terra and Y’shtola leaned in to see.

“Curious…”

“It’s so small,” Terra said. “Does it hurt?”

The magic faded and my shoulders slumped.

“No,” I said, “but it does take a lot of concentration.”

“And what of the dark?” Y’shtola asked. “Does it take as much energy?”

My eyes narrowed as I concentrated. Surprisingly, finding the dark energy inside me was easier than the light. It jumped at the chance to be used. My hand was soon shrouded in dusty black mist. It reminded me of the daemons on Eos. That caused a pang of worry to hit my heart.

My hand continued to hold the darkness for much longer.

“That’s a bit worrying…” Terra said in a small voice. “No wonder Materia reacted the way she did. You might actually belong to Spiritus’ band…”

My head shot up to meet her gaze. She looked at me, eyebrows furrowed with concern. I looked to Y’shtola.

“What- Does-?” I swallowed. “Does that have any merit?”

“It may,” she responded, still thinking. “There is another here who might be able to provide more substantial observations. Unfortunately, I am unaware of her whereabouts. I shall do my utter best to provide what little explanation I can.”

“So… Any hypotheses?”

“Just one, though it would require further research. I wish we had the time for it. Perhaps with all seven of us, we would be able to discover something previously unseen.”

“Seven of us?” Terra questioned.

“With myself and Shantotto, it could work, but it might be fruitless in what little time we possess. However, combined with the three of us here as well as the doctor, Cecil, and Vayne - and Noctis, of course - there might be better council from a larger band of resources.”

“We could always ask Materia. Or Spiritus.”

“Hell no,” I said, crossing my arms. Y’shtola grinned wistfully.

“It isn’t a _horrid_ suggestion,” she said. I shrugged, not wanting to deal with the Goddess of Laundry Baskets. “As for the theory I’ve concocted… I believe, for now, it is a matter of energy. With no magical base to your world, of neither light nor dark, the gods who bestowed this upon you have been relying on your very essence to maintain the balance. They fused you with light magic, but the cut you received is too much for your soul to handle. That is where the dark comes in.

“It would seem that the white magic you use consumes energy. It exhausts you, feeds on your core being. The darkness, however, renews that energy. You’ve been convinced to use your healing abilities sparingly, so it hasn’t come up until now. But the more you use them, the more energy your soul consumes, and if you consume too much, it creates its own power supply from your body. There is, admittedly, not much to back this, but it _is_ a start.”

“So…” I thought for a moment. “Light is bad for me, dark is good?”

“More like they require each other to live presently and coexist in a state of renewal. The light keeps the dark at bay. Without it, I’m not sure what would happen.”

“Man… Wait until the guys hear _this.”_

“It is utterly fascinating. You’re a scientific and magical marvel!”

I smiled shyly. “I try…”

At that moment, a portal opened and Warrior of Light stepped through.

“The time for battle has come!” he announced. “We will meet at the battlefield ruins. Materia and Spiritus await us there now.”

I sighed, heart fluttering nervously. I stood along with my two new friends.

“Worry not,” Y’shtola said. “If anything happens, you can always come find me.”

“And me!” Terra said quickly. “We’ll do our best to help you.”

I smiled widely. “Thanks. I mean it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeet YEET magical theory


	28. Oh Dear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The battle arrives.

Noctis wasn’t exactly happy to hear the news. He was more puzzled than anything. Cecil and I did our best to try and explain it on our way to the battlefield. I looked forward to seeing what Vayne had to say.

“So we’ll just ask Ignis and Luna when we get home,” Noct said. I nodded, hardly listening. The ruins we were meeting the other team at looked like a broken amphitheater. A large rift had broken it in half, the middle falling into the ravine below. Ionic columns supported a crumbling entablature. Noctis elbowed me to pay attention. We and all our allies situated ourselves on the steps. I stood near Noct, and by his new friend, Zidane. Warrior made his way out furthest.

_Guess he’s our spokesperson._

The villains on the side had taken their places as well. All was quiet for a moment. Then Garland stepped forward.

“To cast off the chains that bind us to the cycle,” he shouted, “we must make our stand!”

_Alright, I’ll agree with you just this once._

Warrior drew his sword and lifted it up before him.

“Our common enemy is none other than the plansegorger!” he announced. “Whether we be gods or their champions-!”

He turned his head slightly, his eye catching mine. I nodded.

“-or variants there between…”

He trailed off, stopping suddenly. I saw his shoulders bouncing. Was he… Yep, he was laughing. Noct and I exchanged a glance. We were both thinking the same thing:

_What the hell is wrong with this guy?_

“We may have our differences,” Warrior continued, “but in this world, we are one!”

_There may come a time when we abandon all notion of fellowship - but it is NOT this day-!_

“For the time being,” someone on our side said.

“Right,” Terra agreed. “Don’t think you’re forgiven.”

I nodded. Noct summoned his Engine Blade. I sighed, slumping slightly, and reached out for Ithilcalad.

“This world was pretty cool, after all,” my brother said.

“Yep,” I said. “Maybe after all the shit back home is over, we can come back.”

“Let’s meet up again once things calm down,” Zidane agreed.

We waited for the signal.

“Go forth,” Materia said. “And prevail!”

The battle began.

The first thing that happened was me almost having a panic attack. I followed Noctis down to the broken, rocky field and just watched. I watched as everyone around me began clashing. They were all so… _skilled._ And _dangerous._ Explosions boomed left and right. My eyes couldn’t keep track of all the blows and blocks of swords. Noctis ran off somewhere. I knew he’d be fine. If he could survive Titan and the empire, then he could survive this.

I just didn’t think _I_ would.

A flash caught my eye nearby. Terra was fighting her best amongst the rubble. One of the sorceresses from earlier was targeting her. I summoned what little courage I possessed and flew out to them.

Terra was too far away. I wouldn’t be able to reach her in time. My fear caused my sword’s blade to freeze over. The witch summoned an array of colored bullets and fired. A surge of anger went through me. Without thinking, I rushed forward. I dashed over floating rock, stepping and stepping. Ithilcalad’s icy blade reached a frozen tip.

My foot hit the last boulder. I lifted my arm, and swung.

The witch barely avoided it. I sent a bolt of lightning her way. My body dodged her own magic. I shoved a burst of flames at her.

“So you did take their side,” she taunted. I exhaled.

“I take the side of the people I care about,” I shot back. I swung again. She flew sideways and a charged beam burst into my field of vision. I blocked it with a wall of ice. It burst and sent me hurling back.

Ithilcalad caught on one of the rocks. I hauled myself to my feet just in time to see two of the witches sending pulsing magenta energy at Terra - who had been guarded by Y’shtola just before. I darted down to them right as another burst of magic cut off the blast. The small, rodent-looking lady laughed.

“You guys okay?” I asked. My new friends nodded and jumped back into action. I stood still for a moment before deciding to check on Noct and then see if I could find Vayne. I stumbled over the rocks and drifted back down to the ground. Flashes of red and white caught my attention. Lightning and Sephiroth were fighting on the quickly tumbling boulders. I may be willing to fight for a friend, but I didn’t know Lightning very well and I was _not_ about to touch a scuffle with Sephiroth anytime soon. Noctis warped in, anyway. They were fine.

More explosions caught my attention. I dashed over to the middle of the field where Warrior and Garland were dead set on eliminating each other.

_Nope._

Someone grunted loudly nearby. Kefka was taking on two boys, one of which had joined Noctis and Zidane when we left for this place. Vaan, I think he was called. I contemplated getting a real hit in on the clown.

_Eh, why not?_

As he was distracted by the light ball of energy they were kicking back and forth at him, I aimed carefully. With a louder crack than I would have liked, the sky lit up with a bolt of electricity. And I was promptly blasted forward as someone hit me. My glasses got knocked off. I quickly grabbed and readjusted them. A guy with blond hair and a beanie grinned slyly at me.

“Not cool,” I said, trying to clean my glasses. “These are _prescription.”_

He said nothing, but rushed me. Ithilcalad rejoined the fight. I managed to parry and jumped back. I lit the ground around me on fire, silently daring him to come closer. He dared.

The giant shield on his arm intimidated me but I tried not to let it show. I met his quickly timed punches with lightning and fire. However, he was still too fast and I ended up flat on my back. He came at me again. My heart nearly stopped. Breathing proved difficult. I struggled to kick at him. I rolled over and swung out with Ithilcalad. My fear welled up in a burst of dark energy.

I found myself able to stand. My lungs heaved, trying desperately to calm me down.

“Don’t panic, don’t panic.” I didn’t realize I was whispering it out loud. Beanie Guy rushed me again. I sidestepped and ran. I could hear his footsteps come after me. I turned a lashed out with any magic I possessed. Someone lingered in the corner of my eye. Beanie Guy swung, I blocked. Repeat. Parry. I broke through the fear for a few seconds and attempted to strike. A burst of dark magic came in from the left. Ice shielded me quickly. My magical instincts were getting better.

Another blond guy was hovering to my left. His regal disposition suggested he wasn’t someone to mess with. Now I faced _two_ people. I started to break down. My eyes were wide with terror. Beanie came at me again. I swung out with one hand and sent lightning flying at Wizard King. Something in the distance burst into red particles. A person was running our way. This time, I sent Beanie back with a wall of ice and came running at Wizard. Both of them dodged my amateur attacks. A beam of energy and the shield of Beanie closed in around the same time. I raised my arms in defense.

Something _slammed_ into Beanie, sending him flying into a boulder. Unfortunately I got hit by Wizard’s attack. My glasses didn’t fall, but they did lie askew on my face. I hauled myself up for the millionth time.

“That is _no_ way to treat a lady,” Vayne’s voice came from above me. He situated himself in front of me. “Her power is mine.”

_Holy shit. That was awesome._

Wizard narrowed his eyes. Beanie shook himself off.

“Not bad for a rookie,” he quipped before dashing off somewhere else. I saw him heading in Lightnin’s direction. Wizard hadn’t left.

“If her power is yours,” he said arrogantly, “then claim it.”

“So be it,” Vayne said. I watched as he made quick work of Wizard. I never thought I’d be the type to be attracted to specific fighting styles, but there I stood in awe. My heart was pounding and not just from the fighting. The raw power and practiced movements in his body had me in a shy, anxious tizzy. I was also heaving and coughing from all the dust and dirt. Someone else came to confront the Wizard and Vayne drifted back to me. “My apologies for my tardiness.”

“It’s fine,” I croaked, voice cracking. “I really shouldn’t be here.”

Vayne shook his head. “No, you shouldn’t be, not at your level. But thus spake the gods.”

A fiery explosion covered us in more dusty particles. An eye twitched in annoyance. I sighed.

“Now what?” I inquired. Kefka spotted our open. Vaan and the other boy - Tidus - were still with him. Vayne nodded towards them. My grip tightened on Ithilcalad. “At least I won’t feel bad for fighting _this_ one.”

“Hmm, I’ve been needing to kill something today.”

_“Same.”_

While Vayne went for the boys, I went for Kefka, who was looking pleased at my joining the fight. I sent a burst of flames and electricity at him. His own magic countered mine easily. I began to think about consciously using the darkness. One of the energy balls nearly hit him. I dashed up and swung, my sword misted in a light gray. A beam of energy cut my attack off. I sent a blast of ice and snow out in both surprised fear and frustration. The area around us now looked like a cheap winter wonderland attraction.

I retreated back slightly as the magic attacks kept coming. I focused my will in several, _sharp_ shards of electrically charged ice - and shot them all at Kefka.

_For Terra!_

He had to move quickly to dodge those. One almost hit him. I sent bolts of lightning straight after, realizing the more ground between us meant I could attack more easily. My clown-like adversary soon found himself busy with someone else coming in from the other side. I almost felt disappointed.

That someone also had Vayne occupied and Vaan was coming in with vengeance. My heart flipped and I flew over. My feet landed on the ground. I ran and ran and ran until-

_**Shing!** _

Our swords collided and bounced off each other. Vayne’s head turned sharply to see what the noise was.

“Wha- hey!” Vaan called out at me. “I thought you were on our side-!”

“Sir,” I interrupted, happy a quick comeback was ready for fire, “that is my _emotional support consul.”_

“Your what?”

Instead of a verbal answer, he got a sword charged with electricity. Right as it clashed with his own weapon, a burst of darkness and a piecing roar alerting everyone to rise of the giant, golden serpent. The planesgorger flew up into the air, its body coiling loosely, spiralling in the air. I stepped back, brushing against my friend.

Everyone banded together against the giant Jormungandr wannabe. I had never seen anything that big, not even Titan. Lots of people huddled together as it readied a cosmic blast.

I’m not sure what I was thinking. All I knew is that something was attacking and I had to defend. As the blast hit everyone at once, my arms came, bringing a thick wall of ice to shield just two of us: me and Vayne. It was hard keeping it up. The white magic felt like it was burning me alive. As the power persisted, the black mist welded up and strengthened the icy shield. My body misted with it. I missed the hands on my shoulders until they lifted.

The world around us was an utter hell on whatever planet this was. I tried quelling the flames, but they sprouted back up quickly. Vayne pulled me back as they licked at my shoes.

Jormungandr remained. I looked on as everyone jumped into action as one, clashing against the beast and showing it no mercy. Flashes of bright lights and the glints of swords broke the air - and the snake burst into a mortal form.


	29. Remember Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It all comes to an end...
> 
> ...or does it?

“_______!”

Noctis came sprinting over as fast as he could. The planesgorger manifested itself as a giant, winged serpent. No longer was it gilded, but the color gray wrapped around its form. Everyone regrouped before attacking. I met my brother with another hug, thankful he had survived Sephiroth.

“Thank the Astrals you’re alright,” he breathed. “I’m sorry - I should’ve paid more attention-”

“Noct, I’m fine,” I laughed. “All thanks to Vayne, here, otherwise I’d be in _much_ worse condition.”

Noctis turned to the man in question.

“Guess I owe you one,” he said. A ghost of a smile appeared on Vayne’s face.

“Then I shall think of a colorful time to collect,” he said.

“Everyone!” Warrior cried out. We all stood at attention. “To arms!”

Noctis warned me not to get near the gorger. I’d settle for magic attacks, then. Charging electricity was something I had come to enjoy. The crackling sound it made and the tingling sensation in my fingers made for a good new stim. Hiding behind, a broken pillar of stone, I let the magic out in time with the the other mages.

I watched Terra release a series of icy spheres. Y’shtola worked with her to send fierce attacks at the serpent. Cecil and Warrior were fighting side by side, narrowly dodging the beast’s tail. Bursts of light blue alerted me to Noctis warping in. I caught sight of his armiger circling him. A similar circle of swords surrounded Vayne, who commanded them with ease. Everyone seemed to be alright. So far.

The snake charged its attacks and released an abundance of damage. My worry about my friends grew. I watched Noctis get knocked back by a beam of energy. I almost rushed forward, but remembered his warning. Next was Cecil getting trapped between the spiked gray tail and the ground. Warrior tried to retrieve him, but was driving back. Terra got launched by one of the beast’s attacks.

The planesgorger was massive. It reminded me of the Pokemon Rayquaza excep it was bigger, golden, and a lot deadlier. It could defend itself against everyone’s attacks, but not all at once. Its attacks, however, began to drive them back. I watched as they were struck down, one by one. Noctis hauled himself up, stumbling a bit. Cecil had managed to get out from the snake’s hold and was attempting to join the fray again. It didn’t last long. Terra was now among the outskirts of our allies, using magic instead of head-on blows.

Everyone seemed to notice their mutual struggle. With nods and unspoken words, they banded together in a tight group, charging a final attack. With an explosion of light backed by both Materia and Spiritus, the planesgorger was struck down, imploding into a burst of sparkling particles.

Silence. No one spoke for a moment. Then, one by one, they began to cheer. I smiled with excitement and relief and ran out to find Noct.

“You did it!” I shouted as I reached him. We exchanged high fives. “That was amazing! Wait until the guys hear about this!”

“Man, they’d be so jealous they missed out!” he said, also smiling.

“Ignis would probably kick you for being so reckless.”

“Eh, he can deal with it.”

I laughed and held a hand out.

“If you don’t let me heal you, you will be tackled,” I said. He sighed with a groan and held out his arm. One poke and I doubled over, my chest feeling like it had been stabbed. A cough forced its way out. I quickly summoned the darkness among the dull pain in my body. Black vapor misted up around me. The sharp pain in my chest ebbed away.

“There you two are.” Cecil came walking over to us. His steps grew faster when he saw the darkness surrounding me. “Are you alright?”

“I found a way to counteract the coughing,” I told him with double finger guns. He nodded.

“Just don’t over do it.”

A tap later and his pain vanished.

“Thank you.”

“No problem.”

I turned to Noctis.

“I’m going to help everyone else. Wanna come?”

“Nah,” my brother said. “I think I’m gonna stay here a while.”

He plopped down onto a rock. Cecil sat down next to him. With a smile, I turned away to look for Terra and Y'shtola.

“There you are!” Terra exclaimed when she saw me. “I was so worried when I lost sight you…”

“I’m alright,” I said. “I faced death again and was saved just in time by our resident politician.”

“I’m starting to think he likes you, too.”

“I think he just wants my power. I’m not boasting, or trying not to, but everyone keeps telling me I have potential.”

“After what you told me and Y’shtola, I’m not surprised. I just hope it doesn’t end up hurting you.”

“Speaking of pain…”

I poked her forehead. Sharp pain pierced my arms and chest. I coughed once before summoning back the darkness to help. Terra asked if I was alright.

“Yeah, I’m good.”

“That _is_ an extraordinary way of healing,” Y’shtola’s voice said behind me. I turned around and poked her head as well. Some of the burn marks on her faded. Bursts of heat pricked at my own skin. I shook it off. “Just make sure you know and understand your limits.”

“Right. Any advice on who I should heal next?”

Terra dragged me over to Vayne, who was standing a little ways away. He looked to be lost in thought and his gaze lifted when I was shoved in front of him. Terra must be starting ship us.

“Ah, there you are,” Vayne said. “I suppose you’ve taken it upon yourself to heal everyone?”

I nodded and poked his arm. I did not enjoy the feeling of being hit by a bus. The air got knocked out of me from the force of the dull pain. Wheezing, I looked back up at him.

“What the hell happened to you?” I asked.

“I’d prefer not to disclose the details.”

“Uh, okay. But that felt like I got hit by a train. How are you still standing?”

“Sheer determination.”

“Nice.”

Silence.

“So, uh, I got further details on this magic balance thing-.”

Someone called out my name. I turned to see Terra with a few people who looked a lot worse than the handful I’d healed so far. I looked back to Vayne and gave him an apologetic smile.

“Um…”

“You can tell me later. Go. They need you.”

Zidane and two other blonds stood, scorch marks covering their skin and clothes. A few bleeding scratched had etched themselves into the guy wearing black. He was protesting Terra’s help.

“I said I’m fine,” he was saying as I reached them. He seemed to be trying to break away from the group but no one would let him. My hand glowed turquoise and I tapped his shoulder. His pain was a lot worse than Vayne’s. In fact, it felt similar to what I had felt after Titan and Noctis had fought. I bent over slightly, straightening up after letting the pain ebb away.

“There,” Terra said, sounding a stern mother. “Good as new. _Now_ you can go off and brood.”

With short thanks, he trudged off.

“That’s Cloud. He’s a bit of a loner.”

“...He reminds me of Noctis.”

I turned to heal Zidane and the guy standing next to him (whose name was Tidus). Two more bouts of pain and I was soon making my way around the group of heroes and villains. I purposely avoided Kefka and Sephiroth, unsure of how to approach them. The third to last was Vaan.

“You should really stay away from him,” he said as I tapped his shoulder.

“Who, Vayne? Why?”

“He might seem nice at first, but thousands of people have died in the wars he’s started. He’s dangerous. I wouldn’t want anyone else to get hurt because of him.”

“Eh, I’ve fallen for worse.”

It was an offhand comment with unforeseen consequences.

“Wha- _Fallen?”_ Vaan sounded appalled. I assessed my words before jerking in surprise and straightening up. We just stared at each other in shock.

“I… did _not_ mean to say that,” I said, voice higher in pitch.

“But you still did…”

“...Why don’t we agree to never speak of this again?”

“Sounds good to me.”

Terra helped me with Kefka, who I realized was just generally insane, and the last to be healed was the intimidating (and rather attractive) Sephiroth. I meekly and slowly stepped my way over to him. He was by himself, amusedly watching everyone.

“Um…” I trailed, unsure of what to say. My heart fluttered nervously. “Hi.”

“It’s my turn, then?” he said. His low voice was doing… pleasantly _unpleasant_ things to me. I nodded shyly. “Go ahead.”

_Where do I touch?_

_...Let’s not take that train of thought._

I hesitantly poked his arm. Surprisingly, there wasn’t much pain on his side. I stared at him in confusion. Why wasn’t he as hurt as the others? I remembered seeing him fight just as hard.

“You’re Noctis’ sister, right?” he asked. I supposed he was recalling fighting Noct.

“Uh, yeah…”

He smirked. “Interesting.”

I hurried back to Noctis, who was brooding now. I nudged him with my foot as everyone began to file back up to the land above the ravine. Materia and Spiritus had returned to their towers, leaving us all with a handful of strange white creatures with magenta antennae.

“What is _that?”_ I asked.

“Do you not have moogles when you’re from?” Cecil asked. I shook my head.

 _“That’s_ a moogle?”

“You literally have a shirt with one on it,” Noctis said.

“Yeah, but… Still.”

The moogles began handing out small crystals to everyone. Warrior explained that these crystals would allow us to leave behind a copy of ourselves to help the two gods in their quest for energy from battle. How convenient.

“Wait, we’re leaving already?” I said.

“I suppose so,” Cecil said. “It was nice meeting you two.”

“Same here,” Noct said. “Hope we can come back sometime.”

I nodded in happy agreement before spinning around. Heart pounding, I spotted Vayne and marched over to him. He wasn’t very far, actually. Maybe ten feet away. Noctis could keep an eye on me from where he was.

“So I… guess this is goodbye…” I said. “Or a ‘see you later’ type of ordeal…”

“Actually, I had a proposal for you,” Vayne said professionally.

“A… what?”

When my head tilted in confusion, he continued.

“Come back with me,” he said. “To Ivalice. There, you wouldn’t have to deal with the ‘Astrals’ and we could truly determine what it is that has you in such a state. It would do well to both of us, I think, if you’d accompany me.”

_Oh. I see…_

“So that’s why you’re so nice to me,” I said with a sad smile. “You… just want my power.”

He was silent for a second. I waited to see if he had any protest.

“Perhaps at first,” he then said. “Our personalities fit well together, I think, and you remind me of someone, in a way.”

I thought it over. It did sound nice. I’d be in a world where the Astrals had no influence, maybe helping Vayne with whatever plan he had against his own gods. They had Lord of the Rings in Ivalice, so that was a plus. I could further this odd friendship I had with Vayne, as well, maybe even turn it into something… more…

_But…_

“I can’t,” I said, shaking my head. “I want to, kind of. It sounds fun, but… Noctis needs me. I told myself I’d help him reclaim his home. I’ve lost my own now, and I’d hate to see him lose his for good…”

“I see… A pity, really, but if that is your wish, I will honor it. Should we ever meet again, the offer shall still stand.”

He held out his hand. I stared it for a moment. Without thinking, I voiced my first intrusive thought.

“Do you ever take your gloves off?” I asked, curious. The corners of his mouth threatened to lift but he kept himself in check. I watched as he slowly extracted his hand from the white gloves, probably a last try at getting me to join him. A pang of guilt throbbed in my heart. “I wish… I had something to give you… To… remember me…”

He blinked thoughtfully. A few seconds passed. Then he reached into a hidden pocket in his coat. He held out his hand again. On the palm, was a shiny, white, ornate rook. It had been carved from marble and glistened in the light of the Dissidia world.

“Take it,” he said. I blinked once.

“Are you sure? If you carry it around with you, isn’t it important to you?”

“I’d rather you have it.”

He took my hand and turned it palm up. The chess piece was placed in my hand and he curled my fingers up to cover it.

“Thank you…” I said softly. He nodded. Noctis called my name. “Um, I guess I’ll see you later, then?”

“I would hope so. I wish you the best of luck in your adventures.”

“Same to you.”

I slowly made my way back over to Noctis. A moogle had two crystals with it. Noct already had one. The other was placed in my free hand.

“Wait, I get one, too?” I asked it. It bounced slightly, nodding. “Wow, thanks…”

A shimmer of light flashed and a copy of both me and Noct appeared, smiling at us.

“Ready?” The real Noct asked me. I nodded.

“I guess,” I said. “I’ll miss this place, though.”

“Yeah, me too.”

White particles sparkles around us, lifting us in the air. Cecil and Terra and all our other friends shouted their goodbyes. I looked down at the rook in my hand and then back up. My eyes met Vayne’s again and I waved with a smile. He bowed his head.

My hand took Noctis’ as we were transported back to Eos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not to worry! There will be more Dissidia in the future!
> 
> Here’s the rook Vayne gave her (the piece on the far left):  
> https://images.app.goo.gl/rgS425ft7DofCqUx6


	30. I’m Taking A Break, Thank You Very Much

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A well deserved interlude.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have returned to Eos!

Blink.

Blink.

_Blinding light._

“Agh…” I groaned, raising a hand to cover my eyes. The sun shined harshly down. Its heat pierced my skin.

“_______?” I heard Noctis ask. “Are we back?”

“Noctis!” “_______!” “Thank heavens you’re alright.”

I sat up to see Ignis, Gladio, and Prompto hurrying towards us. We seemed to be on a campsite. I didn’t remember being here when we left.

“What happened?” A worried Ignis asked quickly.

“You two sleep deeply, but I didn’t think it was _that_ extreme,” Gladio said.

“Woah, woah,” Noctis said, lifting his hands to stop them. “Hold on - what happened?”

“You two were out cold for nearly six hours!” Prompto explained. “We tried everything to wake you up.”

“Nothing worked,” Gladio added.

“Your trip into the tower was taxing,” Ignis calculated, “but surely not enough that _this_ would happen.”

Noctis and I exchanged a glance. I silently asked him whether we should tell them or not. He sighed and nodded.

“Might wanna get comfortable,” he said, “this is gonna take a while.”

A while later and the guys were staring at us like we had grown two new heads.

“So…” Ignis began. “Your consciouses were summoned to another _world?”_

Noct and I nodded in tandem.

“And there were other humans?!” Prompto asked excitedly. “That’s insane!”

“Welcome to my world,” I quipped.

“I wanna meet this Vayne guy,” Gladio said. “Have a talk with him.”

“W-what for?”

“No one manipulates my friends without consequences.”

“I don’t think he was manipulating me… He seemed sincere most of the time. And he helped me!”

“Still… I don’t trust him.”

“I’m more concerned about the planesgorger,” Ignis cut in, “and ______’s enhanced abilities.”

“We took care of the giant snake,” Noctis said. “Our new friends helped keep ______ safe.”

“Yes, but the darkness is nothing to ignore, Noct. I agree that perhaps it helps to balance the rest of the magic within her. But using it to counteract the effects of her healing is… questionable.”

“What, would you rather she die?!”

“Of course not! All I’m saying is to keep an eye on her magic use. And if it truly is in tune with her emotions, we’ll have to be extra careful.”

“But world hopping!” Prompto exclaimed, eyes shining. “What was it like? Was it awesome? I bet it was awesome!”

“If you call a barren wasteland awesome,” I said, “then yes.”

“It turned out to be pretty fun, though,” Noctis said.

“True. And we made some great friends.”

“I’ll say!”

 

We walked into Lestallum about an hour after that discussion. Apparently the guys didn’t notice our dispondentness until they tried waking us up for a bathroom break. After lunch, the guys went to restock on ingredients and potions while I worked up the courage to talk to the concierge at the Leville. Iris was waiting when I got there.

“________?” she said. I jumped slightly and calmed when I saw it was her.

“Hey Iris,” I breathed. “You scared me.”

“Sorry… Where’s Gladdy and Noct?”

“They’re stocking up on stuff for the road. We got beat pretty badly - well, Noct and I did - in this place called- hey, what’s wrong?”

Iris wasn’t smiling. Her gaze was cast at the tiled floor, arms folded. She looked… sad. She shook her head at my question.

“I… Can I tell you when the guys get here?” she asked. I nodded.

“Yeah. Um… Hmm.”

_What do I do? What do I say? Do I offer a hug again? Should I just stand here and wait?_

I pulled out my phone and told Ignis what was up. He responded that they’d be there soon. I slipped the device back in my jacket pocket. Iris didn’t seem to be any better.

“Here,” I said gently. My hand gestured to the round seat in the lobby. “Why don’t you sit down? I’ll go get the rooms I said I would and I’ll come right back. Ignis said they’ll be here soon. Does… Does that sound good?”

She nodded. Once she was sitting, my legs carried me to the front desk.

“Umm….” I murmured. “I, uh, I need… two rooms. For five people. Uh, double beds in both, please…”

The concierge typed something out on his computer. “You’re in luck! We have just enough open spaces.”

Not knowing what to say, I just nodded once.

“How many nights will you be staying?”

“Uh…”

_Crap I don’t know. Maybe a night? Or two? Depending on what Iris has to tell us, I have no idea._

The awkward silence had me hating my inability to talk to people normally. The man stared at me as my mind blanked.

“I- I don’t- Oh, um… Maybe just- I think- I don’t…”

He became more confused the more I stuttered. I couldn’t get a complete sentence out and he said nothing. My shoulders fell and I took a step back.

“Actually, you know what? Neverm-”

“Just one night, thanks.”

Ignis, you were sent from above.

He guided me back to where everyone was waiting after we collected the keys. Iris stood and was talking to Gladio.

“The empire came while you were gone,” she said. We all tensed.

“We should probably continue this somewhere else,” Gladio said. We filed up the stairs and to our rooms. I saw Talcott peek out from one nearby. He closed his door when he saw me staring.

“None of us said a word about Noct,” Iris explained once we were all situated. Most of the guys stood - Gladio was behind Iris - and Prompto and I sat on one of the beds. I averted my gaze and listened. “They just showed up and then…”

She sniffed.

“Poor Jared…”

“What do you mean?” Gladio asked urgently. “What happened to Jared-?”

“There was nothing we could do!”

The room was filled with silence and a stiffness that came with the unexpected death of a loved one. I didn’t know Jared well enough to cry, but my chest tensed a little and my heart sank. He had been so nice and welcoming to me.

_Is this… No it couldn’t be my fault. We’ve been gone too long. How did they know?_

_What do I do? Should I say something?_

_No, bad idea._

The creaking of the door notified us of Talcott’s presence. He was sniffling and trying his hardest not to cry. My heart ached. This poor boy… He didn’t have anyone else, did he? Besides Iris, but… they weren’t related as far as I knew.

Noctis crouched in front of him.

“It’s… not right,” he said. “We should’ve been here.”

Talcott’s restrained sobs reached my ears. He refused to meet anyone’s eyes. I stood.

“I… I couldn’t…” he choked out. “I couldn’t stop them!”

_Oh, my heart…_

“But I won’t let the empire get away with it,” Noctis continued. “They’ll pay… for what they’ve done. I promise.”

“I… believe in you, Prince Noctis,” Talcott sniffed. He stilled for a moment before turning and shuffling down the hall. Some sort of strange maternal instinct lit up inside me. As Iris spoke again, I slipped through the door.

I followed Talcott. He stopped in front of his room’s door. I knelt down in front of him.

“Hey,” I whispered. Unsure of what else to do, my arms opened. “Come here.”

Still sniffling, the small child was slowly enveloped in the most comforting embrace I could provide. One hand rubbed his back. He kept trying to hold back his tears with heart wrenching sniffs and quiet sobs. It caused a slight pain in my chest.

“It’s okay to cry,” I told him. “It’s perfectly okay. It’s a natural response to grief.”

He let himself cry. My hold didn’t let up and I wouldn’t let it until he was feeling better. After a while, he returned the hug.

I wasn’t sure how much time had passed. All I knew was that there was a sad child without a mother that needed help. And if no one else was going to give it, then I would. Children don’t usually sit well with me, but I’d make an exception this time. Talcott was sweet and very smart and seeing him so upset… Well, I already said it hurt.

When he had calmed down a bit, I withdrew my arms. “How are you feeling?”

“Better,” he said thickly. “Thank you, Miss ______.”

“It’s no problem at all, okay? Remember: your emotions are valid and it’s perfectly alright to show them. I’m really sorry about your grandpa. But you’ll get through this, okay? It’ll take time, but I’m sure he’d want you to stay strong, right?”

He nodded firmly. “I won’t let him down!”

I smiled. “I know you won’t.”

Talcott went to his room. I stood there silently for a moment, picking at my now wet shoulder. Oh well, it was worth it. Poor kid…

We all finally got a break that night. Albeit a depressing break, but it was a break nevertheless. I curled up on a warm bed after a solemn dinner. Talcott wasn’t looking much better but his crying had halted for the time being.

Noct and I shared a room while the other three took the second. Ignis had the second key to ours so he could wake us up in the morning. Not much was said while we got ready for bed. Noctis was rather tense, his frame stiff and mostly unmoving when he stilled. I tried to get him to talk, but he resisted so I dropped it.

I fell asleep first that night. The sound of someone tossing and turning drew me from my dreams. Noctis panted and growled in his sleep. A few whimpers came forth. Sighing, I sleepily stood. He wasn’t even under the covers.

“Noct,” I muttered, shaking him awake. “It’s just a dream. Wake up.”

He grunted and turned his back to me. “Ten more minutes.”

An hour or two later, his nightmare returned. I got up, shook him awake, and went back to bed. And then it happened a third time. I sighed for the umpteenth time.

“Alright move over,” I growled sleepily. He had pulled up a blanket the second time he woke up. I shoved him a few inches and crawled next to him.

“What’re you doing…?” he drawled.

“This is the third time you’ve had that dream. I will make it run in terror. Goodnight.”

Ignis found us platonically (or familially) snuggling the next morning. The picture made its way onto his phone and into my messages. He would never let Noct live that down. The prince was super embarrassed, however, glaring at Ignis and almost pushing me out of bed. We decided to never speak of it again for his sake. I saved the picture on my phone.

Noct and I sluggishly made our way downstairs. Everyone else was waiting at the doorway.

“Shall we then?” Ignis prompted.

“Yeah,” Gladio said. “I don’t wanna leave Cid and Cindy waiting. They’re fixing up the boat as we speak.”

“We ought to thank them.”

“Actually, Jared’s the one we oughta thank.”

“He really thought of everything,” Prompto said.

We made the short trek to the Regalia. Fitting six people (Iris was tagging along) inside would be a squeeze, but it could be done. Ignis decided to put the top up and Gladio reluctantly let his sister sit on his lap. If fortune favored us, it wouldn’t get too cramped.

The ride wasn’t anything to write home about (if I _could_ write home). Just the usual scenery of forests and occasional lake. About halfway through the journey, a giant, triangular airship flew overhead. I immediately looked down. Bad memories…

“Oh great,” Gladio said, voice laced with sarcasm. “Another floating fortress.”

“Let’s pull over,” Ignis suggested. Iris turned to Noctis.

“Noct…” she trailed.

“Relax,” he said. “We’ve got this.”

“I’m assuming I’m banned from going?” I said.

“Probably for the best,” Gladio answered. Ignis pulled into a town called Old Lestallum.

“Thought so.”

The guys left me to explain go Iris what had happened at the last imperial base. She was pretty shocked when I told her over lunch. Then I told her about Costlemark and the whole planesgorger disaster.

“Sounds like you’ve had a hell of a time,” she joked.

“More of a frozen hell,” I said, smiling. “So what’re we gonna do while they’re gone?”

The answer was defy the patriarchy. Against what the guys would advise, Jared’s death had Iris out for the empire’s blood (not that she would let her brother know). But since we couldn’t hunt down imperials, we settled for small hunts we couldn’t possibly die from.

Being the daughter of the king’s Shield naturally meant she grew up learning how to fight. The guys confirmed their course for the base, meaning they wouldn’t be back anytime soon. It had been a few hours already after getting a motel room and eating lunch, so since we were already bored, why not?

The sabertusks we took out didn’t stand a chance. Fighting with Ithilcalad was smooth and much easier than the blade the boys had given me. Combined with magic and Iris’ quick, graceful strikes, they died out quickly.

Next were some giant wasps I didn’t want to go anywhere near. We began with a blast of ice and snow and finished them off within a few minutes with only minor scratches.

By then it was getting late. The motel room provided a wonderful place to rest. Hopefully the last bounty we took wouldn’t take too long tomorrow.

“So tell me more about this Vayne guy,” Iris said as we got into our beds. I had the one nearest the window, as per usual. And she was teasing me now, of course.

“Well…” I swallowed. “He’s a consul of… somewhere.”

_What was it? Raba-something. Radagast, radabaster, alabaster, no… Hmm…_

“Consul?” Iris interrupted my thoughts. “What is that?”

“I… don’t know actually. Lemme look it up.”

Eos’ version of Google was Moogle. Its mascot was the little white and magenta creature that had given Noctis and I our crystals. I typed ‘consul’ into the search bar.

“Okay… ‘An official appointed by a government to live in a foreign city and protect and promote the government's citizens and interests there.’ Oh, that’s pretty cool.”

“Yeah! But what kind of government does he work for?”

“He mentioned an empire. I think he’s also from a noble house. He seemed pretty proud of that.”

“You’ve got expensive taste, girl!”

I couldn’t hide the shy grin that crept onto my face.

“But you said he works for an empire? That’s got to raise a few flags…”

“Yeah, a few. We were talking about the gods that brought us here and how unfair and rude it was. He was… willing to destroy their world to… ‘correct it’? I mean, there was nothing there. No people, no animals, no plants, nothing. I don’t know what the point of that world is, to be honest, if there’s no history and no one to _make_ history.”

A waiting silence fell between us. I waited for Iris to respond.

“Well,” she said slowly. “That _is_ pretty worrying But he returned to his own planet, right? So it all turned out okay. What does he look like? He’s a politician, right, so I bet you wouldn’t go for one of those unless he was attractive at the least.”

I laughed and was thankful for the slight change of subject. “He’s… Hmmmmm I’m not used to this kind of talk…”

Heat crawled up my neck to my face. The heart fluttering in my chest wanted to break free and fly away. My hands pulled the comforter up closer to me.

“Oh come on!” Iris said. “You’ve been traveling with four _guys_ for weeks. You need some girl talk! And I’ve been single for so long I need _some_ romantic entertainment.”

“Glad to know I amuse you,” I said, trying to keep my smile down. We both laughed.

“So go on! Tell me!!”

“Only if you tell me about you and Noctis.”

“What? Me and- me and Noct? There’s- there’s nothing like that between us we’re just friends I don’t know why you’d think that ha ha…”

“Wow. So discrete.”

“He has Lady Lunafreya, anyway… I don’t want to get between them. I’m fine just being friends.”

“Hmm… Alright, I’ll tell you about Vayne if you give me an embarrassing story about Noct as leverage.”

“Deal. So what’s he look like? Is he hot?”

“He’s…” Heat blossomed in my cheeks. The awkwardness I felt could not be described. “Um… He’s… gorgeous. Very noble looking.”

“I need details, ______!”

“Alright, alright! Long hair, side parted but it looks amazing and its a deep brown and kinda wavy. That good?”

“And the rest of him…?”

Man, she was really pushing.

“I don’t know. Everyone was wearing stuff that looked like it came from a crazy anime fantasy setting. His was more tame, though. He certainly looked important when we first saw him. White, gold, and green. Like his eyes…”

I brought the comforter up to hide my red cheeks. Iris was giggling at my timidity.

“A nobleman and politician meets a shy, walking meme. Now _that_ I’ve got to see. Get a picture next time, if you can.”

“I will. Now, Noctis…?”

“Oh, right… Well, it’s not embarrassing for him, but… When I was really little, Gladio had already started training him. I heard lots of stories about him and he’s a prince, of course, so I really wanted to meet him. I ended up getting lost in the gardens. He came and found me and… the rest is history.”

“Meet-cute.”

She threw a pillow at me. “Sh-shut up!”

The morning brought sobering situations. The guys texted me that they’d be back in a few hours. Iris and I hurried to our last hunt: a coeurl. It was basically an electric cheetah with really long whiskers.

The coeurl took both of us to fight. I lit the surroundings on fire as Iris got closer to slash and stab. With a blast of ice, I lashed out with Ithilcalad. Iris stabbed the big cat at the same time, but her attack was more effective. It turned on her and before I could stop it, claws came swiping at her.

With a loud cry, I summoned the power of the Glacian and froze the area within a fifty-foot radius. Then my feet dashed over to Iris who was now sitting on the ground, the dead coeurl lying over her. I pushed it off. Iris was bleeding pretty badly from scratches on her arms and a few had landed on her chest above head dress. My hand glowed a light turquoise. One finger poked her forehead and the wounds were gone.

“Woah, how did you do that?” she asked, awestruck. A pained smile was her answer as the pain from the scratches lit my arms aflame with the sensation. But something was wrong. My chest was hurting, like someone had tried stabbing it but didn’t quite do the job right. One cough escaped me. And then another. “_______?”

I began the coughing again. It wouldn’t stop this time. My body was hunched over, a hand catching the breath from my mouth and whatever came out. Iris placed a hand on my back.

It felt like someone had flayed the inside of my throat. Each cough came out roughly and painfully. When the attack finally finished, I looked down at my hand. Iris gasped behind me.

Little drops of blood stained my hand. My eyes widened, heart nearly stopping.

_No no no this can’t be happening. Now?!_

I tried tapping into the darkness to stop the coughing. My dominant hand was soon covered in a dark mist. A wave of relief swept through my body.

“Um… _______?”

“Don’t worry. I know how to counter it.”

I gave her a weak smile.

“Come on,” Iris said gently, helping me stand. “Let’s get back before the others arrive.”

Scared to speak, I only nodded.

Water was a blessing. I had drank three bottles of the stuff when the guys got back. My throat also felt much better. Oh, and I had also sworn Iris to secrecy so the guys wouldn’t find out about our hunting trip.

“We got some money,” I announced, holding out a bag full of gil.

“And where’d you get it from?” Gladio asked, suspicious. He crossed his arms.

“I found another piano. Turns out people don’t really get live performances around here so everyone was really grateful.”

That seemed to quell their suspicions.

Along the way to Caem, they told us about the fort they infiltrated. One of the heads of the imperial army was there and they managed to knock him out. Only he escaped quickly and then they were attacked by a flying female warrior. Shd called it quits when her work hours were up. I found both amusing and respectable. She knew her priorities.

“I coulda gone another round,” Gladio declared.

“Given her prowess,” Ignis said, “you should be glad you didn’t.”

“Yeah,” Prompto breathed. “That Loqi guy was nothing compared to her.”

I perked up. “Loki?”

“Not your myth guy or whatever,” Noct said. “The guy in the robot machine from the first place we took down.”

I shrunk back down, disappointed.

Another hour passed. We drove down a road with the Rock of Ravatogh in the distance. To our left was a wall and the right was thick, green woodlands.

“Is it me or is this place beggin’ to be explored?” Prompto said.

“Never been one to turn down an invitation,” Noct said.

“That explains a lot,” I muttered. He gave me a lighthearted shove.

“If what they say about the Malmalam Thicket is true…” Ignis thought aloud.

“Then we might just find what we’re lookin’ for here,” Gladio finished.

“A boat?” I questioned, confused.

“No,” Ignis said, smiling. “A royal arm.”

Oh. Right.

_Man there are a lot of those._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright I’ll shut up about Vayne now lol


	31. Ruin-nation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arm? Royal.  
> Ruins? Solheim.  
> Imperial? Blockade.  
> Chancellor? Ardyn.  
> Guide? Aranea.  
> Hotel? Leville.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :D

“Oh! While you guys were gone, we saw a chocobo run past and it had a person on its back. _______ said you actually got to ride them! I bet it was super fun.”

“Haha, yeah,” Prompto brushes it off like it was nothing.

“Noct, call a bird for the lady,” Ignis said. Noctis blew the chocobo whistle. Light breath tickled the back of my neck.

“Hello, Sleipnir,” I cooed, nuzzling her beak. Sleipnir chirped.

Iris let me name her chocobo Artemis and we were off. The trail leading to the thicket took about an hour to get to by bird. We all followed Noct as he led us over rocks and hills and then over a bridge I was scared of. The water below looked inviting and cool but I didn’t want to take any chances.

“_______, get a move on!” Gladio called. “It’s just a bridge; you’ll be fine!”

 _“Just_ a bridge?” I shouted back. “Say that to all the movies where the bridges snap!”

_Bridge over troubled waters, I’ll bet._

Sleipnir took matters into her own hands and carefully stepped onto the wood planks. Step by step she walked until we were on the other side. I gave her a few grateful pets and whispered praise. Precious girl.

Malmalam Thicket was dark and dank. Most of the path was surrounded by natural stone walls covered in moss and thick trees in every corner. The smell of wet grass hung in the air, which felt the tiniest bit humid but still a bit cool.

Giant bugs swooped out of the air to attack us. Terrified, I swung Ithilcalad at them until their corpses lied dead on the ground. Not today, thank you. I’d really rather not deal with that today. Prompto readily agreed with me. Then the trees sprouted up and started attacking us.

_Talk about being ‘one’ with nature…_

In a little alcove in one “room” of the thicket, Noctis found some Malmashrooms. Ignis inspected them and his eyes lit up like fireworks.

“That’s it!” he declared.

“What’s up, Iggy?” Gladio asked.

“I’ve come up with a new recipe!”

I mouthed along as he said it. That phrase was becoming a sort of meme within our little group. He had said that at least ten times by now.

“I can’t wait to try it,” Noctis said. We continued on.

After fighting some huge crabs that wanted to eat me, we came across a creek flowing down from the hill. Right next to it was a campsite. I prayed to any god listening that we wouldn’t stay there for the night. It was just past one in the afternoon.

They did decide to have a late lunch there, so that was a nice break. Noctis and I gathered some more magical energy. ‘Twas I who lit the campfire and put it out when we were done. The food was, as usual, delicious. Iggy used his new recipe, which I admittedly mostly picked at. Then we were on our way.

“Ah, man!” Prompto exclaimed once we were back in the water and heading upstream. “My underwear’s soaked!”

“I… really hope that’s from the river,” Noct replied.

Getting to the top of the slope was difficult. We slipped several times. The current’s strength tugged at our feet. It threatened to carry us away. Prompto and I helped each other not to fall. Then Gladio helped us when we reached the top.

Another fight broke out with the local wildlife. Some of us kept falling into the water. The bug bugs made us dizzy and I really hoped I wouldn’t hurt myself in confusion. When that dispersed I was set upon by one of the giant crabs that wanted to feast on my flesh. Well, they probably didn’t but that’s how I saw it. The battle went on for ages but thankfully, with six of us, it got done sooner than I expected.

We had to wade through a part of the waterfall to keep going. Tired of all the water getting in my shoes (it was sloshing around and making me cringe), I just froze the whole thing so we could sneak over it. Simple enough. We had to be careful not to slip, though.

“It just keeps going,” Noct said when we were all on the other side. I canceled the freezing effect and torrents of water came bursting over the edge. Good thing we were out of the way.

“Then we keep going too,” Gladio told him sternly. Now the surroundings were completely made of rock. Our footsteps were the only sound as we rushed through. The stone gave way to grass and dirt halfway. The cave opened up to a green clearing surrounded by birch trees. A very large creature roamed around in the back. I lagged behind a bit, memories of the jabberwock still fresh in my mind.

With a few words of courage, the guys ran toward it. I stood there, trembling and watching. The thing was as big as the dragon in Costlemark and just as scary. Its face was armored with spikes and horns. The rest of its reddish body was much the same, ending in a spiked tail that didn’t pose as a threat this time.

My hands heated up, glowing a slight red. I lifted one up and _boom!_ The ground beneath creature exploded with flames. It roared and charged me.

“Oh shit,” I muttered. Wielding Ithilcalad, my legs dashed to the right. I ran toward the trees. The beast skidded to a halt and and swung around. “What _is_ that thing?”

“I believe it is called a bandersnatch,” Ignis called back.

“Benedict Cumberbatch?!”

_Oh Ben, what has this world done to you?_

“Ban-der-snatch!”

“Free band-aids with every snack?”

“I’m not repeating it again!”

My laughter sounded almost maniacal as I lit the bandersnatch on fire again. He charged once more. I fled. He ran into the trees. The boys launched themselves at the vulnerable beast. With another burst of flames and more blows from the guys and Iris, the bandersnatch was no more.

“Noct, you might want to see this,” Ignis said. At the very end of the clearing, a royal tomb rested. Noctis unlocked it, and we waited as he collected the scepter inside.

“Almost makes up for the soaked socks and bug bites,” Prompto joked. I smiled and nodded.

The rest of the ride to Cape Caem relaxed all of us. No more having to kill things and traipse through the wilderness. Although, killing things other than daemons wasn’t sitting well with me. It just made me feel guilty, even though it was self defense.

We finally made it to the port after driving through a tunnel. A gorgeous, blue ocean sparkled in the sun’s light to our right. Seagulls flew about in the distance. An odd-looking lighthouse sat on a hill. I assumed that was where we were heading.

“This the place?” Gladio asked.

“Sure is!” Iris answered. “Thanks for the lift Ignis.”

“My pleasure,” he said.

“Can’t wait to see my buddy Talcott!” Prompto said.

Cape Caem was just as beautiful as the sea it bordered. A cute little trail rimmed by stacked bricks led up to the lighthouse and a place to stay. The leafy trees and sea breeze gave the whole place a light and airy atmosphere I wholeheartedly welcomed. Letting go of the tension in my body, I relaxed a bit, shoulders dropping.

Cindy waited for us about halfway up the path. She had us follow her up as she explained what was going on with the boat. I wasn’t really listening, but my ears did their equivalent of zooming in when I thought I heard the word “mithril.”

_Nah, they wouldn’t have that here. That’s more Lord of the Rings. Too much of a coincidence._

Apparently work on the boat was going at snail’s pace. A very steady snail, but a snail nonetheless. Cid didn’t have all the material he needed, so we’d probably have to go out and get it ourselves. I sighed. Another setback.

_When can Noct and I see the Oracle?_

_Not now and at this pace, probably not ever._

Biting back a groan, I trailed behind my friends as they reached a very worn and weathered house. It had definitely seen better days. The edges were dark and a bit rusty. Whitewashed walls had started fading with time. How old was this place?

Talcott waited for us in the front. He greeted us excitedly.

“I think Miss Cindy might’ve told you already,” he said, “but she needs a very special kind of ore called mythril to fix the boat.”

So I _did_ hear right. My happy inhale had heads heads turning.

“Sorry,” I muttered, looking down.

“You know what that is?” Prompto asked.

Shivering slightly, I answered, “Only the toughest material in Middle-earth! - Lord of the Rings again, Noct - The dwarves in Moria had a lot of it, I think. Nothing can pierce it! Not even the spear that a troll threw at Frodo got through. He wasn’t skewered, he just got a big bruise!”

“And just when I thought you couldn’t get any nerdier,” Gladio teased.

“Well,” Talcott cut in, “not exactly, but you’ve got the right idea.”

I beamed.

“Remember the waterfall? I read in Grandpa’s notebook there’s some ruins near a lake just north of there. It said you’ll find mythril inside!”

_More ruins? Yes please!!_

_Lord of the Rings, ancient ruins, and my new best friends? All we need is the friends we made in that other world and this would be perfect._

“About that lake,” Iris said. “Pretty sure he was talking about the Vesperpool.”

The knowledge I had gathered in this world surfaced.

“Steyliff Grove?” I asked eagerly. More staring. “More Solheim ruins.”

“Great,” Noct grumbled. “More places to get trapped in.”

“I asked Monica to look into it,” Iris continued, “and she told me the road leading there’s under imperial lockdown.”

“Road work ahead?” I whispered to myself. “Uh YEAH I sure HOPE it _does.”_

Prompto and Noct snorted and had trouble keeping in their giggled next to me.

“Give us a minute,” Gladio told Iris.

“Uh, okay?” she said, put off by his request. “I’ll wait inside then.”

When she was gone, Gladio turned to all of us.

“So, yeah,” he began. “I’m gonna have to ask you to handle this boat business without me.”

_What? Why?_

“Say what?” Prompto voiced.

“Got some business of my own to deal with,” Glad told us. Noctis mulled it over for a moment.

“Do you thing,” he decided. “Not like we could stop you anyway.”

“You know me too well. See you around guys.”

Gladio left by chocobo. He also left Ignis to take his place with Noct as my training instructors while he was gone. Too bad I didn’t get out of that.

_But where is he going? What ‘business’ does he have to tend to?_

I guessed we’d find out sooner or later.

 

A few days passed. Gladio was still gone. I spent the time training and helping the others with various tasks. There was a cat by the lighthouse I visited often. She was very sweet and followed me around. I named her Pearl.

Once Ignis declared we had sufficient preparations, we headed out for the Vesperpool. It took a very long drive to even get near it. We made it to the area around the waterfall and frozen hell they call cave.

Sitting in the backseat and not pressing up against people was a feeling I had missed. Noct took the wheel, so it was me and Iggy behind him and Prompto. I had long since gotten used to the windy sensation of my hair whipping around in air currents the convertible stirred up. Unfortunately it made it very frizzy. I looked almost like an electrified cat.

“The waterfall cave was right around here,” Ignis pulled me from my thoughts.

“That means the lake should be somewhere north of here,” Prompto added.

“Be wary, though. Where we go, the empire seems to follow.”

Noct steered us toward a gates tunnel. We got a bit closer and the gate… opened? We drove on through.

“Wait,” Prompto said. “What happened to ‘under imperial lockdown’?”

“They all but turned the key and left the gates open for us,” Ignis surmised, “as if awaiting our arrival.”

“-I bet it’s that guy,” Prompto sighed, annoyed.

“Ardyn…” I muttered as Ignis said simultaneously, “Chancellor Izunia…”

_That guy is **everywhere.**_

“Can’t complain as long as he lets us in,” Noct said casually.

“Who’s to say he’ll let us out?” Ignis countered. I got an uneasy feeling from that idea. Being stuck in the wild with the empire breathing down our necks did not sound like fun. “Would that the marshal were with us, since we are a man down.”

Wish Cecil was here. He was a good traveling companion.

The road to the Vesperpool was long, winding, and puzzling. Noctis got lost at some point and Ignis and I had to figure out where to go using the map. We had gone too far, so we turned around.

Way too many troops of MTs stopped us along the way. On every stretch we came to, there they’d be at the end, ready to fight. I got so tired of repeatedly leaving and getting back into the Regalia. I just wanted to see the ancient ruins. Was that too much to ask?

At long last, we reached a parking spot. Tall leafy plants shaded the area. The clucking of birds nearby pierced the air. Not wanting to tire ourselves out further, Noct led us around them. When we reached a pool of shallow water, I gasped at all the carved stones around us. They were spread across the ground. Small corners from old, long-dead buildings jutted up from the earth. I bounced over to a fallen column. The writing carved into it was no language I had seen before. I hurried to the next. They were the same.

“You know what?” Noct said, sighing. “Just go for it. We’ll meet you there.”

“Really?” I exclaimed happily.

“Just don’t go too far,” Ignis said. “The empire is still around somewhere.”

I carefully ran towards the ruins in the distance. A few blocks stopped me, begging to be inspected. Some had moss growing on them. I peeled it off. Then I was bounding over to a more intact column in front. When I got tired of those, I kept my little jog up.

The ruins came into sight. With a happy noise of excitement I picked up my pace. But something quickly obstructed my path and I couldn’t stop in time.

“Oof!” I ran into someone. Their arms came out to steady me as I almost tripped over my own feet trying to stand back. “I’m so sorry! I got excited and-!”

It was Ardyn.

“Well, well,” he said with his usual smirk present. I swallowed nervously. “What do we have here?”

_Shit shit shit what do I do?_

“Surely they wouldn’t send a defenseless young woman out into the wilderness all on her own?”

I took a couple steps back. My mouth couldn’t form words. No thoughts for response entered my mouth. This man was dangerous. And I had literally run into him.

_What do I say what do I say what do I say_

“Cat got your tongue, darling?” Ardyn chuckled. My eyes were wide with fear. “Perhaps you can answer this: are your _friends_ nearby?”

The way he said ‘friends’ did not rest well with me. It was as if he didn’t really believe we were friends, that they didn’t really care for me. I bravely narrowed my eyes, still unable to speak.

“No? Pity. I was hoping to speak to them, you see. I believe I can help you with your _little problem.”_

My eyes went wide again. Thoughts flew through my head. I didn’t know how to respond. My mouth wouldn’t work. My body just froze.

_Damn it, say something!!_

I tried to open my mouth to speak. Nothing.

_I can’t. I can’t. Noctis, where are you?_

Maybe the Astrals did have my back. My friends appeared right on cue.

“Gentlemen,” Ardyn greeted. I jerked around to see Noct and the other two. Ignis’ eyes were narrow. “What a pleasant surprise.”

Prompto groaned. “Told you he’d be waiting.”

“With my imperial friends, no less,” Ardyn added slyly. “But fear not - I’ll put in a good word.”

Noctis’ eyes glanced at me. I sent him a fearful look.

“What?” he asked. “You okay?”

I glanced around at the ground, trying to make my mouth work. When it still wouldn’t respond, I shook my head.

“What did you do to _____?” Noct growled, coming forward to pull me back.

“I haven’t done a thing, I promise you,” Ardyn answered calmly.

“Then why can’t she talk?”

“I haven’t the _slightest_ idea.”

“______, come here,” Ignis said, sending Ardyn a warning glance. I huddled close to Ignis. Prompto came to closer to provide more comfort. Ardyn watched as Ignis whispered a question, “I’ve been reading more about autism. Is this what going nonverbal means?”

I jerked my head up and then down, unable to nod in any other way.

“Alright. There’s no need to speak. Let us handle it.”

I tried a nod again. It was easier this time.

“All set?” Ardyn asked, eyeing my curiously.

No one answered.

“Well, come along, then.”

He escorted us through the- was it a swamp? Anyway, he led us through the water. The trees provided pleasant shade. I slowly began to calm down, my wrist slowing its movements slightly. I hadn’t even realized I’d been stimming. Another fallen column caught my attention.

_Oooh… That one looks different!_

“Don’t stray too far!” Ardyn called out. “Lest you get left behind.”

I quickly rejoined them.

“And surely you’d rather avoid unnecessary scuffles, seeing as you’re now a quartet.”

Noctis bristled with irritation. I placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Oh dear. Touchy subject?”

_Please stop taunting my friends, you creepy fucker._

“One we won’t discuss with you,” Ignis warned.

“Then let’s discuss why you’re here,” Ardyn said. “Hmm… It can’t be archaeology-”

“Bet,” I managed to quip quietly. He gave me a sideways glance.

“-mythril, perhaps?”

“Yeah that too.” “This guy’s reading our thoughts!”

Prom and I stared at each other for a second.

“Only _she’s_ here for archaeology,” he explained. I clapped my hands twice in glee, also happy I was gaining my speech back. This time Ardyn gave me a smile. “You know Costlemark? She went _crazy_ there!”

 _“Noct_ went crazy there,” I muttered.

“Hey!” Noctis protested, giving me a slight shove. “You were the one going on about pediments and stone carvings.”

“Yeah and you _weren't!”_

“And that puts me at fault?”

“Yes!”

“How?”

“Alright, you two, that’s enough,” Ignis ordered. Ardyn chuckled.

“Mythril,” he repeated. “It’s a _precious_ resource, you see. We can’t let just _anyone_ get their hands on it.”

“But you’ll help us get ours on it, right?” Noct said melodramatically. Ardyn let out a comedic gasp.

“I never said that!”

I started giggling.

“Of _course_ you didn’t,” Prom said.

“Where is the fun in that?” Ardyn pondered. “I thought you’d rather dig it up yourselves.”

Noctis and I looked at each other. Another expedition into ancient ruins filled with daemons? Hmm… Maybe another day, thanks.

Beyond the fog emerged the silhouette of Steyliff Grove. It looked much different than Costlemark. Instead of a tower and Colosseum, it was one long, walled building. There weren’t as many columns and the outer walls were rather plain. I suspected the real decoration was within them.

“Fear not, I’ll be but a moment,” Ardyn said. A handful of soldiers were stationed around the area. Three of them guarded the entrance. One manned a small airship. Ardyn talked to the person in the middle of the entrance, a woman in complicated armor that resembled a dragon.

“A moment doing what?” Prompto sighed.

“Beats me,” Noct replied.

“All set!” Ardyn announced. “Go right ahead.”

We walked closer cautiously, creeping through the water.

“Alas the ever wary military-”

_**!!!!!! Wordplay.** _

That phrase would be repeating in my mind for the next few days, I bet.

“I must prevail upon you to accept an escort. I’ve seen to everything.”

My friends went up to the woman at the entrance. She was being paid to escort us under the guise of doing “special training.” We were her new recruits. She eyed me with one eyebrow lifted.

“Don’t remember you at Fort Vaullery,” she said.

“I was… in detainment,” I put awkwardly. That just made her more confused. “They wouldn’t let me help out.”

She nodded.

“I trust you’ll be civil,” Ardyn said. “Commodore Aranea Highwind! I leave them to you.”

_Her name literally means spider. Huh._

Aranea told us we had to wait until sundown to go in. Just like Costlemark. Great. I prayed we wouldn’t get locked inside.

“So _______,” Prompto prompted. “Whatcha know about this place?”

_It’s my time to fucking shine._

“So the people of Solheim were all about fire, right?” I began. “Sol means sun, so it makes sense. Anyway, if that’s true, then they believed fire to be a symbol of life and energy. Naturally, water represented death and mortality. So this place here, Steyliff Grove, is a mausoleum they used to pay tribute to the dead at the Vesperpool.”

“Huh,” Prom said, shifting weight to one foot. “So we’re grave robbing. Cool.”

I laughed. “Think of it as ‘borrowing’ something.”

“Ah yes, ‘cause that makes it better.”

“Very impressive,” Ardyn’s voice was closer to me this time. A shiver ran up my spine. I spun around slowly. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but would the lady mind if I had a word with her? Now that she can speak.”

“Uhh…” I looked to Ignis for help.

“Absolutely not,” he said sternly, leaving no room for argument.

“Come now, we’ll be but a moment.”

“If she doesn’t want to,” Noctis said, hands turning into fists, “then she doesn’t want to.”

“I…” I trailed. “What did you want to ask me?”

“That is between you and me, my dear,” Ardyn said.

“Uh… No thanks. I’m good.”

“Very well. Then I shall be off. And do take care of your healer. It wouldn’t do to leave her behind and abandon her.”

_Abandon me? Why would he think they’d do such a thing?_

He left before my friends could say anything.

“We should keep ______ away from that man,” Ignis suggested.

“Agreed.”


	32. Dungeons and More Dungeons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two dungeons in one day has everyone exhausted.

Since it was mid afternoon when we got to Steyliff Grove, Noctis and Ignis decided to check out a place near the Vesperpool called the Myrlwood. According to my history book, a king of Lucis had been here before and there was a chance to find a royal arm there. We took our chocobos and skirted around the beautiful lake.

This area really reminded me of home. A long backyard had stretched for half an acre to a shimmering pool of water. That water eventually led to a river. A small forest lied right by it, a trail twisting through. I lagged behind to get a better look.

_Maybe if I can’t get home… I could find a place to live around here._

The Myrlwood was overgrown and filled with shade. The tree canopy blocked the sunlight from filtering in, leaving the air around us cooler than normal. Leafy plants lined the grassy path in.

“Wow! This place looks like a jungle!” Prompto said.

“Abundant in not only flora, but fauna as well,” Ignis added.

“Kinda dark,” I muttered. The further we went in, the darker it got. “This is more of a thicket than Malmalam.”

A small scuffle with the wildlife broke out and resolved itself quickly. I mostly hung back, still in the tight grip of homesickness. I remembered the rule about forests and protection and pulled my jacket hood over my head to prevent ticks from latching on.

“Hey, ______, you okay?” Prompto asked. “You’ve been quieter than normal.”

“Yeah,” I sighed, “this place just reminds me of home the most. I lived on a lake like this. It was bigger and led to the Tennessee River, but it still has the same look. You’d think this would make me feel better, heh…”

“I think we’re all a bit homesick,” Ignis said, readying his daggers as more creatures attacked, “but you, most of all.”

“We’ll get you home,” Noctis grunted, fending off the long tails on the living trees. “I swear it.”

Soon we came upon stone leading inward. We followed Noctis through.

“Can’t say we’re out of the woods just yet,” Ignis said.

“Not with all these monsters,” Noct said. “There’s danger at every turn.”

“Take care we don’t lose our way.”

“How could we?” I said. “It looks pretty straightforward.”

“Still, there could be branching paths or lack thereof beyond this stretch.”

“Right.”

We did reach a fork in the road. To the left was a small pool of clear water. To the right was more rocky path. In front were more monsters. They perished quickly.

“Hey,” Noctis said, looking the small waterfalls pouring into the pond. “Think we could stay here after the Solheim expedition?”

“To fish?” I teased.

“Why else?”

“I don’t see why not,” Ignis said. “As long as we make it out in one piece. If not, we can try again some other time.”

We continued to the end of the woods.

At the end of the rocky pathway was a small cliff overlooking one singular tree surrounded by a large puddle. Noctis led us down the natural ramp to the left. We were immediately greeted with a living tree attacking us, this one much bigger than the others before it.

“This one is a Treant!” Ignis called out to me. My heart jumped.

_“Treebeard, what have they done to you?”_ I exclaimed. “We will put you out of your misery!”

“Enough with the references!” Noctis said. “Just set it on fire!”

I did as told. At the same time, Noct threw a magic flask. The treant lit up like a bonfire on the Fourth of July. A roar sounded from it like a million trees creaking and groaning in a storm. Ignis marked its weak points and Noctis hit everyone of them. Prompto fired a bullet so loud that I got flashbacks to Schoolhouse Rock’s “Shot Heard ‘Round The World.”

The monster prepared a pounding attack. We fell back, splashing in the water as it began to rain. Finally, Ignis raised a hand toward the beast.

“With everything we have!” he shouted. We charged the treant. Noctis warped in, Prompto fired off several rounds, Ignis sliced forward, and I overcharged Ithilcalad with ice to the point that it looked more like an icicle than anything else.

_Work on control later. Go!!!_

The walking tree fell.

I panted heavily, leaning back slightly to catch my breath. That was wild and fast. As I stood, Ignis walked further into the clearing. Noctis looked his way. Through the rainy mist was the silhouette of a royal tomb.

_Oh of COURSE there’s one here, too!_

“Of all places,” Ignis said, “here, too, rests the powers of kings. I wonder how many more remain.”

“All of them,” I said back.

“Is that a fact or joke?” Prompto asked as Noctis unlocked the tomb.

“Yes.”

The weapon inside was a large shuriken. Noctis called it the Star of the Rogue when he collected it. It looked to be bigger than half my body, which scared me a little. I hoped he wouldn’t use it during training.

“Noct,” Ignis said.

“Yeah?”

“Night will be falling soon. I suggest we hurry back to Steyliff Grove.”

By the time we got back, evening had turned to dusk. We gathered around the entrance to the ruins. Our guide was waiting for us, ready to get this over with. She left two of her men to guard the outside and off we went.

Aranea seemed pretty laid back for a leader of the empire’s air force. However, she was also the kind of person who wanted to get things done as quickly as possible so she could get back to whatever it was she did on the side. So that combined with me rushing all over the place to look at even the tiniest details in the stone did not make for the greatest start to our little expedition.

“The hell are you going?” she asked me, a tad annoyed. I had gone the opposite direction once we reached the bottom of the stairs leading down. They had gone left while my curiosity went right. Noctis steered me to the right direction.

“Don’t wander off,” he said gently. “We don’t want you to get hurt again.”

“Right,” I said. “Sorry.”

“Uh, _______?” Prompto asked nervously. He lagged behind a bit as we continued. “Any reason the lights are still on?”

“Uhh… Nothing I can think of. Costlemark was a little the same, remember?”

“R-right… Fun times.”

“This place has seen better days,” Ignis commented. Just like in the tower before, Steyliff Grove was littered and filled with rubble. Some of it still crumbled and fell, causing us to jump a little. Just like in Costlemark (the two were quite similar), lots of rooms held daemons. Thankfully it wasn’t just Noct and me this time round.

A door led to a long open hallway. We were on the second floor, looking down. I rushed to the railing. On the first floor the ground was covered with stone tiles. The parts in the corners where the tiles were no more had grass growing on them. Light poured in from above, illuminating the area in a way that… wait a minute…

“Beautiful beyond words,” Ignis breathed. My eyes were cast upward. I pointed at what I saw. Prompto gasped.

The underwater pattern moving about the floor wasn’t just a cool effect. A flowing layer of water was suspended in the air. It seemed to act as the ceiling for this place. It pulsed and moved like gentle waves. Light swam in like a neverending tide, making the whole place look like we were submerged. I quickly got a picture. I knew someone who would absolutely _adore_ this.

“Woah,” Aranea observed. “If that’s the water’s surface…”

“Wait, what?” Prompto was completely flabbergasted. “Does this mean we’re underwater?”

“Nothin’ like this in Costlemark,” Noct said. “Just endless staircases and spiral slopes downward.”

“The control room was pretty cool,” I reminded him.

“Yeah, but it was nothing compared to this.”

“True.”

“Woah,” Prompto said, “there’s even fish.”

“Where?”

“Company!” Aranea called out as we walked onto an open balcony. More Grimer clones popped out. These ones were orange and red. I froze them all solid. Noctis smashed them into pieces. The others finished off some skeletons. So far it was going so much faster than with just two of us.

My happiness ended when we came to a collapsed floor. The only way across was a tiny ledge that did not look like it could support all of us. Noctis and Aranea scooched across first. Then Ignis decided to go last to make sure Prompto and I were alright. I gestured for him to go before me.

“Nuh uh,” Prompto said. “Not until you go. Ladies first.”

“Prompto,” I said sweetly.

“Yeah?”

“Please go across so I don’t panic. Or I will gladly _kill_ you.”

Prompto went and then I did. The fall looked terrifying. My heart was racing faster than a cheetah. Unfortunate that I had to look down to see where I was putting my feet. One foot almost had me slipping down, but Noct and Prom helped me the rest of the way.

There was a room with a series of broken walkways. Some looked stable enough to walk on so Noctis went first, stepping carefully. The floor immediately collapsed under him. A horde of daemons, much _larger_ daemons, popped up and attacked.

“_______, stay up there!” Noctis called out. Ignis, Aranea, and a reluctant Prompto jumped down to join the fight. I helped where I could from above. Some small shocks of electricity zapped here and a few bursts of flames burned there. But they did most of the work. An iron giant was felled by Noct and Aranea. I was instructed to wait while they found their way back up. The floors floated back into place. I gulped and pressed my back against a wall, sliding down to sit.

When they finally returned, I was holding a ball of fire in my hands for light and warmth. It flickered out when they appeared. My mouth opened to ask if anyone was hurt, but Ardyn’s words rang in head.

_“And do take care of your healer. It wouldn’t do to leave her behind and abandon her.”_

Sighing, I followed the group as it descended. My depressed mood from earlier that week was returning. Lagging behind wasn’t something I wanted, but it happened. Noctis and Aranea were at the front, leading us down a small flight of stairs. Prompto was right on their heels. Ignis glanced back to see me wandering almost aimlessly, hands in my jacket pockets.

“Everything alright?” he asked, waiting for me to catch up. I nodded. He sensed I wasn’t up for talking and let me be. Bless you, Ignis. Instead he asked Aranea a question, “What does the empire seek here?”

“Specimens,” she answered. “and we’re stuck harvesting them.”

“Specimens?” Prompto asked.

“Daemons.”

A fight interrupted the conversation. More skeletons attacked and a reaper fought against Noct and Iggy. I held my sword for protection and lit any open enemy aflame. It rounded up quickly.

“Turns out the empire makes weapons out of them.”

“Weapons?”

“Yeah. I’m sure you’ve seen your share by now. ...Something not quite right with the empire lately.”

“It’s not just lately,” Noctis said.

“True. Maybe it’s time I left.”

We continued to creep along. Another staircase led us to another floor down. Noctis paved the way for us down a narrow corridor.

“What would you do?” Prompto asked curiously. “If you left the army.”

“Whatever I want,” she answered. Fair enough. “I was a mercenary once. Maybe I’ll round up my men and hunt daemons for cash?”

“That’s a… a heck of a plan.”

One fight later and the talk continued.

“What about the empire strikes you as ‘not quite right’?” Ignis questioned.

“The emperor and new high commander,” Aranea told us, “for starters. And then there’s that charmer of a chancellor. I really can’t stand that guy.”

Noctis glanced at me at the mention of Ravus. Ignis looked a concerned about Ardyn considering his sudden and weird interest in me. Our guide glanced at me with a raised eyebrow.

“Don’t know what he wants from you, though. I’d be careful if I were you.”

“I have been,” I answered. “It’s like he wants to get me alone for something.”

“Remember what the marshal said,” Ignis said. “We need to keep you out of the empire’s reach.”

“And what does that make me?” Aranea said.

“Apologies.”

“Don’t worry. I agree, actually. Whatever _His Excellency_ wants from you most likely isn’t good.”

After fighting our way across a bridge, we went down even more stairs to find corridors and hallways intersecting with each other. There were so many rooms, none of us knew where to start first.

“Which way?”

“Whichever way leads to the treasure,” Noctis said.

“If only we knew,” Ignis muttered.

“Wish we had a map,” I said.

“Guess we bumble on,” Prompto said.

“Keep the bumbling to a minimum,” Ignis told him. Their banter started to pull me from the funk I was in. Noctis had me come to the front.

“We could really use your instincts right now,” he said.

“What instincts?” I questioned.

“Anxiety. Which way is safest and won’t get us stuck in here for hours.”

I hummed and slowly observed all the walls around me. We had just exited a circular room. A dead end lied to the right. So I walked left. We passed a small room and came to another hallway. I looked right. Another wall. Left again. We continued until we came to yet another corridor crossing. Prompto came up and looked left.

“Hey, what’s that?” he said, heading to a metal plate in the ground. My heart leaped.

“NO!” “DON’T!”

Noct’s and my exclamations caused our blonde friend to jump. He whipped around.

“No need to be so loud about it,” he said, raising his hands in defense.

“Sorry,” Noct said. “That’s what got us trapped in Costlemark. Probably shouldn’t go near it.”

“Just in case,” Ignis added. I nodded.

“You guys got locked in one of these places?” Aranea asked.

“Just us.” Noctis gestured to me and himself.

“I almost died,” I said matter-of-factly with a smile, as if it didn’t really matter. She glanced over me.

“You’re tougher than you look,” she complimented. My smile widened.

One right and one left later and we came into an small inner chamber. Elemental magic rocks waited to be emptied. I happily sucked up the ice. Noctis split the other two with me.

“So what exactly is the deal with you, anyway?” Aranea asked me casually. “First you were in ‘detainment’ and now you’re here?”

“I, uh, may have…” I swallowed. “I almost tried to fight Ravus.”

She nearly stopped in her tracks.

“So that was you?” she asked, looking me over once more. “You got a death wish or something?”

“Not exactly… Uh, does word get around that quickly?”

“We had a briefing recently. Chancellor was talking to him about it. Takes guts to do something like that. Ravus seemed pretty pissed you got in his way.”

Another small fight broke out in an empty room. I froze the place in frustration. We could hardly make two steps before more daemons appeared. Aranea was even more confused with me.

“Is that _magic?”_ she asked.

“Uhhh… No.”

“Right. The room just _did_ that.”

“I see no reason to keep it secret,” Ignis said. “So many people have seen it by this point.”

“She can heal people!” Prompto added excitedly. He calmed slightly. “Only it hurts her, so we don’t use it often.”

“Huh.” Did anything faze this woman? “Yeah, I’d _definitely_ keep her out of the empire’s hands if I were you. Does the _chancellor_ know this?”

“Unfortunately.” Ignis gave me a disapproving stare. I withered under his gaze. Aranea was now looking at me like I was some sort of puzzle she hadn’t been able to solve in a while.

“...Knew something wasn’t right with him… Again, be careful with that guy. He’s got the whole nation practically under his control. Or at least it would seem that way. Only thing he can’t control is the emperor himself.”

That did not help our current imperial frustrations. We turned a corner into a room with more magic energy and I sapped it up. Noctis changed our course of topic and led us out into the main chamber.

“Oh, spacious,” Prompto observed. “There’s _so_ gonna be a big nasty here.”

“Game design in a nutshell,” I quipped.

On the bridge at the other end of the hall was an enormous, yellow, red, and blue creature. It growled as we walked closer, weapons in hand. It spread its wings wide and glided over us to land behind. Stretching an abnormally long neck, it roared.

“What is _that?”_ I shouted, running to the side of the room.

“A monster!” Prompto called back.

“A quetzalcoatl, I believe!” Ignis answered.

“Quetzalcoatl?!” I screeched. “What is the _Aztec god of the sun_ doing here?!”

“The what?” Noctis shouted. He swung a greatsword at it. I aimed for a lightning bolt to strike it. It interrupted me with its own flashes of electricity. There goes that plan.

“Nevermind!”

“It’s weak to ice,” Ignis instructed. “Use that to your advantage!”

“How do you even _know_ this?”

I waited until it had landed on the ground to swerve by and light up the ground with frost and ice. A fleeting thought glanced by and as the others physically attacked it, I summoned a hoard of ice spikes up from the floor. It shrieked. My body drooped. That took a lot out of me.

Noctis and Aranea were able to strike the beast as it flew. The former’s warping skills were very impressive. Bright blue flashes gleamed all around the air. The color clashed with the softer blue if the water above.

The water above. There was water above us. Ice is made from water. It is literally just froze water. I hid in a corner and tried to think up some plan to use it. Maybe if it got high enough, I could make more spikes? Could my magic reach that altitude? There was only one way to try.

A giant staircase lied at the end of the room. When the quetzalcoatl was preoccupied on the other side, I dashed forward. It was a long stretch to the stairs, but I made it. Or rather, I almost did. The beast flew over my head and aimed an electric attack.

I don’t know what’s more wrong with me: the fact that I reached out to _grab_ the lightning or the fact that it hardly bothered me at all. Anyway, I did that stupid thing. I thought I would die. And I probably would have if it wasn’t for the sheer amount of determination I had in that moment to _not_ die. The crackling blue energy shot toward me. Like a lightning rod, my hand lifted up-

-and _absorbed_ the electricity.

Even the beast looked shocked. An overflow of raw power flooded through me. My whole body was sparking blue and twitching with energy. My veins acted as circuits and my heart and soul were conductors. It dawned on me that _this_ was the power of Ramuh.

“_-______?” Noctis sounded incredibly worried.

I couldn’t attack the quetzalcoatl with lightning. But I could charge up the ice I made. The beast shrieked and roared. It landed and bounced back up to fly and rush me. Noctis and Aranea were quick to act. They leaped up after it. I stood still, concentrating. When the creature reached a height I could reach, I raised my arm up again and brought it back down, my fingers making claws.

The water above temporarily froze. Large, fat stalactites of electrically charged ice jutted out from the surface underneath. The quetzalcoatl was pierced just enough to fall back down. The tips of the spikes were now dyed red.

The energy quickly rushed out of me as soon as it had come. The last thing I saw was Ignis and Prompto sprinting to catch me as I collapsed. Noct landed the killing blow.

The beast was dead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes magic can be a bit too much for Reader


	33. Quid sum facere?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The last true bit of calm before the storm.

I woke several times while I was unconscious. The first was when we reached fresh air again. Ignis was carrying me, I think. The second time we were in some sort of chamber. The guys later told me Aranea gave them a lift to Lestallum, so that must have been her airship. The third time I awoke, I was more aware. I heard Aranea and the guys talking before they carried me away. I fell asleep again halfway to the Leville.

When I reached permanent consciousness, my head started spinning. The anxiety I felt caused a contraction in my chest. Where was I? What was going on? Why do I feel so scared? My whole body was shaking.

“Noct?” I croaked. I couldn’t move. Or at least, not very well. “Noctis? Ignis? Anyone?”

_Mom? Dad? Someone please answer me!_

I tried sitting up. My arms ached and protested loudly. I didn’t get very far and promptly collapsed. My eyes burned a bit as crying ensued.

Where am I? What happened? Why can’t I move?

A door opened. I jumped and frantically squirmed to see who it was.

“Ignis…”

He hurried over. “You’re awake. Thank the gods.”

“I can’t- why can’t I move? Where am I? What’s going on?”

“Shh, shh, shh. You’re a bit delirious right now. The enormous amount of magical energy you used rendered your body in a panicked yet unconscious state. We’re not sure _why,_ but magic has its own state of mind.”

So I was… I was just unconscious for a while. How long had it been? Where was I? My heart jumped into overdrive and my breathing became rapid.

“Please don’t tell me I’m in a hospital,” I sobbed. _“Please_ don’t tell me I’m in a hospital.”

“No, no, no, you’re not in a hospital. We’re in the Leville. You’re perfectly safe.”

I began to calm down slightly. My mind was so disoriented I couldn’t make sense of my surroundings. The blue wallpaper merged with the strips of wood between each stripe. The lights were so bright. I closed my eyes for a moment.

“Where’s Noctis?” I asked. “And Prompto?”

“Noct is assisting the lady who will treat the mythril for us. The power plant is overrun with daemons, so he’s hunting them down for her. Prompto is waiting for him finish. I came back to check on you. It’s good to see you’re doing a bit better.”

Okay. I could live with that. But I really wanted in that moment was a hug. For some reason. I’m not much of a hugger, but my mind demanded comfort. I turned on my side, facing Ignis. He gave me a pillow from the other bed when I asked. I cuddled it, holding on tightly.

“So tired…” I slurred. My eyelids struggled to stay open. Ignis told me to rest. He’d be here if I needed anything. With a few words of thanks, I fell asleep.

It was surprising to Gladiolus in the morning. Noctis and I trudged down to breakfast and he was sitting there chatting with Iggy and Prom. Noct told me he was the other hunter in the power plant. After gathering our own food, we joined the others at the table. It was nice to have all five of us in one place again. Gladio had gained another scar, this one on his forehead. He said he’d tell us about it later.

“So I heard you became a living electric outlet,” he said to me playfully. I grinned slightly, still sleepy.

“Yep,” I said. “And I’m still exhausted.”

“As we suspected,” Ignis said. “You’ll have plenty of time to rest on the way back, and on the trip to Altissia.”

“You guys got the thing?” I asked, forgetting the name for a second. “The, uh, the mythril.”

Noct nodded. “It’s all ready to go.”

We were also all ready to go. Finally, after a month of waiting and dangerous adventures, we were getting to go to Altissia. I was excited to see it. It sounded like an absolutely gorgeous place. Not to mention Lady Lunafreya was there, too. Although, I felt a pang of sadness and longing at the thought of having to leave my friends.

The drive back seemed to fly by. Gladio told us about his journey to the Tempering Grounds to challenge someone names Gilgamesh. That name was familiar and I recalled hearing of an epic about him back home. We all found that to be interesting if not a bit eerie how similar our worlds are. Once we reached Cape Caem, everyone buzzed with anticipation. We climbed to the top of the hill. The lighthouse rested on the cliff comfortably. The early afternoon sun made everything brighter. I had a feeling this was the last we’d see of anything remotely peaceful for some time.

The next few days passed by slowly. It almost felt like the world was trying to say goodbye. I tried my best not to think of the heartache that would come with leaving my new best friends.

In what moments I had to myself, I spent with Pearl the cat. She often curled up on a few barrels behind the lighthouse. No one really went there, so it was a good spot to have to myself. The view of glittering light on the sea helped to fill the conflicting void in my chest.

“I don’t know what to do, Pearl,” I muttered to my feline friend. She was grooming herself in my lap. “I miss home, but… leaving doesn’t feel right, y’know?”

She mewed softly.

“Yeah, I know. But if I go home, I’ll never see them again. And Noctis…”

I sighed.

“He’s like the brother I never knew I wanted.”

Pearl chirped at me.

“I wish there was a way to stay in touch. Maybe I’ll work towards joining NASA so I can find this place.”

My hand began to scratch behind the cat’s ear. She had already been purring, but it grew louder. She sounded like a little motorboat. Her white fur had the softest texture. I missed cuddling with a cat like this. Cats are so sweet and gentle. They deserve all good things in life.

Someone came walking up the right path. I turned my head to see Noctis. His eyes lit up as he spotted me and Pearl.

“Guess we’ve got a mutual friend,” he said, crouching down to scratch under her chin. “I was thinking about going fishing to make some more cat food. Monica said she could help. You… wanna come with me?”

Hmm… It was either stay here and be bored or go with Noctis and spend what little time I thought I had left with him. There wasn’t much of a choice - obviously I’d go with him. So I nodded. Pearl got up, stretched adorably, and padded off somewhere to lay in the sun.

“Alright, come on. There’s a good spot at the bottom of the cliff.”

“You’re fishing on the _ocean?”_

“Yeah! It’s gonna be a great catch. I can feel it!”

Caem Shore was a lot rockier than I expected. I suppose I had thought it’d be more like Galdin. Noctis and I hopped our way across the stones and boulders until we found a small pier. As he readied the line, I went searching for tidal pools.

The sea sloshed lazily against the rock. The smell of salt could not be ignored. Every so often, a breeze would blow by, fueling the calm and cool atmosphere of the ocean. I had no luck finding tidal pools, so I sat down on pier, shoes and socks off and feet in the water. The sudden feeling of nostalgia rushed through me as I remembered the times my dad would take me fishing. I had been a lot younger, but it was fun.

“Whatcha thinkin’ about?” Noctis asked, interrupting my reminiscing. I hesitated for a moment.

“I’ve mentioned several times that I had a friend who adores the ocean,” I said. “She lived on a sailboat for two years of her life and knows the sea backwards and forwards. Everytime I look at the water, I think of her. We were practically inseparable in high school.”

“Sounds like me and Prompto, minus the ocean and sailboat part.”

“Ha, yeah. We had nearly every class together our first year, so… I figured we might as well be friends. I’d never had a friend who had so much in common with me before.”

“Yeah, me too. I just wish he would’ve said something sooner.”

A comfortable silence fell. I swished my feet through the water, trying not to make too much noise. If I scared the fish away, we’d be here much longer.

“How long do you think this’ll take?” I asked.

“Don’t know,” he answered. “That damn fish doesn’t wanna show its face.”

The line began to tug right as he spoke. We’d already been there for a couple hours at least. Noctis had caught everything _except_ what we needed.

“Oh, man, I think this is it!”

I situated myself sideways so I could watch the struggle between man and nature. Whatever kind of fish he was looking for did not want to end up as cat food. The line strained in its metal bonds. I propped my head on my arm. This could take a few minutes.

“Ha ha, yes! Got it!”

The fish was definitely worth the wait. It was huge and colored darkly to blend in with the water. It tried squirming on the hook but Noct would not let it get away.

“Nice!” I said, hurrying to put on my shoes. “Back to the cat?”

“Back to the cat!”

Monica was ready to turn the fish into a meal right we when we arrived. She had actually come out to meet us. However, instead of heading to house to prepare it, she used the small appliances in the lighthouse. I shrugged and figured it was because we were closer to the cat. The strong scents of dead and cooked fish mixed together and forced me back outside. Noctis soon emerged with the plate and we presented it to the very joyful feline. She mewed at us and ate it up quickly.

“That’s one spoiled cat,” Noctis said. I laughed.

“Yep. She’s one lucky kitty. Poor thing must’ve had a rough time getting here.”

“Just like us.”

“Yeah, but she didn’t have any friends to help her.”

I narrowed my eyes playfully at Pearl.

“Or did you, you silly kitty?”

She huffed defiantly at me.

“Alright, then, keep your secrets.”

“Noctis! _______!” Ignis’ voice called from nearby. “Dinner is ready!”

I hadn’t realized how hungry we both were. We gave Pearl a few more pets and went to find Ignis.

“I hope your excursion went well,” he said.

“Sure did!” Noctis said. “Got some more fish for ya, too.”

“Good. I shall make good use of it. Come now, we shouldn’t keep the others waiting.”

A strange feeling washed over me. My heart began fluttering rapidly in my chest. Was this anxiety? Was I dying? Was something about to happen? I couldn’t tell.

_Anxiety, why must you do this to me now?_

Ignis held the door open for us. Noctis motioned me to go first. He was in front of me, though, so I tried to tell him without words to go ahead. He refused.

_Alright, then, fine._

I stepped into the house. And then I almost cried.

All the friends I had made on Eos in the past few weeks were gathered around the table in the main room. Iris, Talcott, Cid, Monica, Cor, Gladiolus, and Prompto welcomed me in. The table held all manner foods they knew everyone including me would eat. And… the sweet scent of cinnamon wafted in from the kitchen.

I was aware this was most likely a send off for me. My eyes stung with the rush of tears coming to them. Throat tightening and feeling dry, I swallowed to be able to breathe properly. Everyone here was so sweet and kind. I had only known them for about a month and here they were, ready to bid me goodbye like an old friend.

_How am I supposed to leave **this?**_

“We couldn’t let you see the Oracle without a proper farewell,” Ignis said behind me. “Just in case it was the last we saw of you.”

Unable to stop the tears from falling, I swiftly took off my glasses, turned around, and hugged him fiercely. I could head several chuckled from all around me. I didn’t want to let go. Prompto bounded over and joined in. Then Iris followed him, saying not to forget her. Gladio pulled Noctis in with him. It was a warm pile of friendship that I did not want to leave.

Someone snapped a picture. Dinner began when Ignis said the food would get cold soon. I sat between him and Noctis. I vaguely recalled telling our chef my favorite food at some point and was surprised he had remembered. It was probably some of the best macaroni and cheese I’d ever had.

Chatter was inevitable. We told everyone about our adventures in the Solheim ruins. Noct and I impressed Cor with our detailed tale of Costlemark. He stated that he didn’t have many more worries concerning our abilities. Cid and Talcott told us some stories they’d heard about the place. Hardly anyone believed Noctis and I’s adventure in another world, although Talcott loved every second of that story.

“Oh, and then he gave me this!” I pulled out the chess piece Vayne had given me. It glistened in the light. “How’s _that_ for not real?”

“You could’ve picked that up anywhere!” Cid said with a slight laugh.

“But it _is_ in good condition,” Ignis said. “A sentimental token.”

“I think it’s sweet,” Iris voiced. “You’ll never forget that place and all the friends you made there!”

“You should’ve seen what she did in Steyliff Grove!” Prompto exclaimed. I groaned. The embarrassment of the attention caused heat to creep up my neck. _“Huge_ spikes of ice just _skewered_ the quetzalcoatl!”

“I passed out,” I muttered, nibbling on some bread. “And Noct killed the thing, not me.”

“It was still _way cool,_ though.”

When everyone had had their fill, Ignis instructed me to close my eyes as he brought something from the kitchen. I waited patiently. Soon the smell of cinnamon from earlier grew stronger. Its sweetness had me smiling. Something was set in front of me.

“I believe you mentioned something like this,” Iggy said, “so I looked into it. It may not be the exact recipe you’re used to, but I do hope I got close to it.”

_Oh, Ignis, you didn’t._

I opened my eyes. My hands came up to cover my mouth. He did. He had actually tried to recreate snickerdoodles. It smelled _heavenly._ The little cookies were a soft tan color and perfectly crisp. The dusting of cinnamon wasn’t completely covering it, but it was enough for me to decide that yes, he had done a wonderful job.

“Ignis, you shouldn’t have,” I croaked. I was really close to crying again.

“I helped, too!” Prompto said. “I put the cinnamon on top!”

“I took ‘em out the oven,” Gladio added. I laughed with a wide grin.

“You guys are the sweetest,” I declared. “Seriously! You’re the best!”

Noctis’ hand reached in for a cookie. I smacked it away.

“Mine.”

Biting into the cookie was like biting into a warm hug. Cinnamon had long been my favorite scent and its taste was just as good. Ignis had done so well I thought it was an actual snickerdoodle for a moment. I gave him a very happy and pleased thumbs up. He let a relieved breath. I handed a cookie to Noct. Soon snickerdoodles were everywhere.

_How am I supposed to leave them?_

I didn’t know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Altissia next!!


	34. In māre apertum!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Altissia holds many surprises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “On to the open sea!”

The next morning, we prepared quickly for Altissia. The boat was ready and so were we. I followed my friends to the lighthouse.

When the elevator reached the bottom, where the hidden harbor was, Talcott told us that the marshal had come to see us off. We filed down the walkway and into the small room off the dock. Iris stood on the stairs, saying goodbye to each of us.

“This is really it then,” I said. She smiled sadly.

“Yeah,” she said, “but it was really nice to meet you. Thanks for looking after the guys when I couldn’t.”

It was my turn to smile. “And I’ll keep doing it as long as I can.”

I allowed her a hug. At the bottom of the stairs, Cor stood from his place on the couch to address Noctis. Everyone else was gathering round. I went down to join them all.

“Something I gotta get off my chest,” Cor admitted. His arms were folded.

“What’s that?” Noct asked. Cor wouldn’t meet his eyes for moment.

“I’m sorry. Sorry I wasn’t there for your father.”

_Oh dear. This is a personal matter. Should I pretend I’m not listening?_

“I swore an oath to protect the king, but… I wasn’t strong enough to uphold it.

Silence. No one said a word. Noctis didn’t know how to respond. The mention of his father brought the memory of Insomnia’s fall. The air stilled. All was quiet.

“Ain’t nothin’ nobody could’ve done to stop what happened.” Cid came walking in, carrying a wrench.

“Yeah,” Noct said quietly. “I realize that.”

Cid sat down on the couch in front of us. “But you need to realize just what you mean to the boys by your side.”

Noct scoffed slightly. “I do.”

“Even if they can’t solve your problems, you can’t hide what’s goin’ on from ‘em. It hurts like hell.”

Cid leaned forward.

“Remember - those ain’t your bodyguards, they’re your brothers. Trust in ‘em, always.”

There was no stopping the soft smile on my face. My friends were like a little family. It was so touching.

I watched in a corner as everyone said their goodbyes. My heart felt like it was being stretched for some reason. Was it sentiment? Or was something bad going to happen? It almost felt like a small rift was being formed. There was a chance I’d be leaving for home soon. I had come to care for these people in such a short time. They had done so much for me and we all took care of each other. I almost didn’t want to go.

“I hope you’re doing all right.”

My head turned to see Cor standing next to me.

“Oh, uh, yeah,” I said awkwardly. “Um, thanks…?”

He nodded. “Even if you can’t find a way a home…”

His gaze turned to where the others had gathered.

“...I don’t think they’ll abandon you.”

I looked over to where Prompto was teasing an annoyed Noctis.

“Yeah,” I said, grinning. “I know they won’t.”

Before we left, Prompto got a picture of all of us together. I offered to take it for him, but he pulled me to the rest of the group. Tears of a melancholy yet joyful sort threatened to spill over. Especially after the small party last night, I was sad to be leaving, but my heart warmed at being accepted. Maybe Prompto would let me take a copy of that picture with me.

Soon the boat was sailing away out of the cape. Talcott and Iris waved as we set out onto the open sea.

The first thing I did was curl up on one of the seats and try to nap. I had half a mind to ask to take a detour to Angelgard so I could have a short “chat” with Ramuh about whatever the hell he did to me. But I didn’t. I just found a pillow in the storage space under the cushions and lied down to sleep.

My dreams were mostly nonsensical. Bits of the conversation drifted into them. Prompto was excited to be on the ocean. Cid inquired about my adjustment here. A few chocobos ran by here and there. The little flock of them from forever ago returned. One black one surrounded by five yellows.

Then the image my brain conjured up dissolved. I could hear rain falling and a muffled voice speaking. There was nothing to see, however. The voice cleared the longer I stayed there.

“-tary, standing in the way, while you rush off to slay the Hydraean for your poor sister’s sake.”

The noise of someone turning on pavement sounded.

“I know the price of the covenant.”

The speech ended. My mind drifted back into consciousness. I kept my eyes closed. My pillow had been elevated slightly. I snuggled into it.

Prompto spoke from behind.

“What are the odds the empire might crash our pool party with Leviathan?”

My body jerked slightly at the name. Days of watching _Supernatural_ told me to stay _away_ from those black goopy freaks. I wasn’t sure I could cut someone’s head off. A hand rested on my arm lightly. Right. Leviathan was the goddess of the sea here. No Dick Roman to worry about.

“Consider it a guarantee,” Ignis said. “They _felled_ a god to prevent Noct was receiving his blessing, and they’ll do so again.”

“But we beat ‘em to the big guy - thanks to our friendly ‘guide’.”

Gladio hummed. “Never know which way that one’s gonna move next.”

“The chancellor has an agenda all his own,” Ignis growled slightly.

“He helps sometimes,” Prompto said, trying to be optimistic. “Like when he called off the army and let us escape?”

“But he was still a creep about it,” Noctis protested. His voice came from above me. Was my head in his lap?

“Well it feels like he’s only helping us because he wants something,” Gladio said. “I just don’t know what…”

“And then there’s the odd interest in ______…” Ignis thought aloud. “That’s twice now he’s asked to be alone with her.”

“Even creepier,” Noct commented. “We’re definitely keeping her away from him. And from the empire.”

“Even Aranea?” I asked sleepily.

“Wha- hey! It’s for your own safety.”

“How long have you been awake?” Ignis asked.

“Since Prom asked about pool parties with Leviathan.”

“You sneaky little bitch.” I knew Noct meant it as a tease.

“You’re the bitch.”

“At least I’m not the one in love with a politician.”

“Oh shut it. Noct, you are _literally_ the _king_ of an entire nation.”

“...Touché.”

“As Gladio said,” Ignis continued, “his actions are not motivated by altruism, but by self-interest. And when he does come to our aid,” Ignis went on, “I see only condescension in his eyes.”

Cid cut in to ask about the king’s ring. Noct said he’d get it when we arrived in Altissia. I had a feeling it’d be a lot harder to get to than that. Cid told Noctis that his dad had considered the ring his heritage. They had traveled together like Noct and his friends before. Then a falling out happened and they never talked face to face again.

_There goes my heart._

The oceans of Eos were a deep elegant blue. Small rocky islands dotted the surface here and there. The smell of salt never left the air. I made sure to get a few pictures so I wouldn’t forget. I’d never traveled the sea like this before.

The path to Altissia lied between two cliffs. It was a thin strip held in by two walls in the water on either side of us. Then it opened as a bridge over a large pool of water surrounded by waterfalls. I gasped and ran to the side of the boat to get a better look. An entry way lied a ways away. Two stone angels flanked the side of the arch-like gate. When we got through security with a really old permit Cid had kept, I skipped to the other side of the boat.

The vaulted ceiling above let the seaside air in. Tall arches lined the way to the port. Small red and purple banners hung from above. My mouth hung open in a wide, amazed smile. The Solheim ruins were beautiful, but this was completely new. And it was absolutely gorgeous.

“They call it the ‘Walls of Water’,” Gladio said when we finally stepped down onto the dock, “but it ain’t just the waterfalls - it’s the whole damn city.”

“Which is why we can’t traverse the town by conventional means,” Ignis explained. “We’ll have to rely on gondolas instead.”

“Gondolas?” The biggest smile remained on my face. “So this place is like Venice!”

“What’s Venice?” Prompto asked.

“A city in Italy known for its gondolas. I’ve always wanted to go there!”

Noctis led us through the port gate. A man stopped and asked the purpose of our visit. Noct paused, unsure of what to say. Ignis told him we were here to study the culinary arts. That got us through.

“You wanna check out Weskham’s place?” Gladio asked.

“Yeah,” Prompto said. “Let’s all go to Maagho.”

“Who’s Weskham?” I asked.

“One of my dad’s old friends, Noctis answered. “He stayed back when they came here. Opened up his own restaurant.”

“Oh, that’s cool!”

We began our journey around the city. The architecture confused me at first. Was it French? Or Italian? Maybe if I could find a cathedral, I could make a decision.

“So this place is like if France and Italy had a child,” I said to myself.

Near some steps were some women talking about an exhibition window showing Lady Lunafreya’s wedding dress. We decided to let Noct go see it before finding Maagho. Several times we got lost, but luckily people were talking about it all over the city. We climbed stairs and traveled across a few portico bridges. Finally, on street, we found it. The sun was starting to set by then. The evening glow lit up the display in a rather romantic way. We let Noct have his space to view the dress.

A picture of Luna had been placed in the window. She was a pretty woman with light blonde hair and a soft, friendly face. She did look a bit like Ravus. He must be the eldest. Which means only girls can be the Oracle. Interesting.

To get to Maagho’s, we took a gondola. The ride was spectacular. I felt like I was riding around Venice as we weaved through the buildings. The gentle swishing of the water calmed my general anxiety. The sea breeze blowing in was refreshing.

Weskham’s restaurant was a fancy place situated on a platform surrounded by water. The only way to get to it was by gondola. Crystalline lights hung from the rafters and the bar was the centerpiece. A dark skinned man with graying hair manned it. He greeted us as we approached. Cid had told him we’d be coming.

“My word, you’ve grown, little prince,” he said. Noct hummed awkwardly. “Ah, but of course. You were only a babe at the time.”

I giggled slightly. There’s always that one person who says something like that.

We all sat down in a row at the bar. Ignis, me, Noctis, Prompto, Gladio. Weskham seemed happy to see us all. I was glad we didn’t have to explain my presence for once.

“So this is your maiden visit,” Weskham said. “Enjoying it so far? You doubtless have many questions, so ask away.”

Noctis asked about the empire first. I didn’t blame him. It _was_ a pretty concerning factor. I just hoped no one would bother us.

“There’s no need to jump at every shadow. Just be aware that the terms of our independence grant the empire free rein to come and go as they please.”

It was a one sided arrangement. Everything they did required Niflheim’s permission. Apparently Luna shouldn’t have been to appear before the public. Weskham didn’t know how the government got that to happen.

“So you see lots of Niffs around here?” Noct asked.

“We do,” our host answered. “Sometimes even at my place.”

A cold wind blew through the restaurant. As Weskham told us about Ravus showing up, I summoned the scarf I had gotten forever ago from Minnie’s shop. I wrapped it around my neck. Much better.

“That woman was right,” Iggy told me. “That scarf does look nice on you.”

I felt my cheeks flush warmly. “It’s colder here.”

Prompto peeked around Noct to see.

“Hey, he’s right!” he said. “Now you and Ardyn match!”

“Prompto…” I growled. My scarf was a deeper and redder color. It reminded me of Mikasa’s from Attack on Titan. “Don’t compare me to him!”

Noctis asked Leviathan as Weskham chuckled at our antics. The government was going to open up the altar of Tidemother. They were stockpiling emergency provisions. So they were allowing the summoning of a havoc wreaking sea serpent? I understood Noct’s blessings were important, but… that seemed a bit much.

_“It is most perverted that you should require the gods’ **approval** to make history.”_

I bristled silently, Vayne’s words playing in my mind. A city shouldn’t have to be destroyed just to receive a blessing.

“Ah my dear Camelia,” Weskham announced as we prepared to leave to find a place to stay. “It’s been awhile.”

“I heard about your distinguished guests,” a woman’s voice came from my left. I turned to see a person who looked oddly familiar.

_What the fuck… Is that Hillary Clinton?_

“Gentlemen, lady,” she spoke to us cordially, “I won’t waste your time. My name is Camelia Claustra.”

_Whatever you say, Alternate Hillary Clinton._

“First Secretary of the Accordo Protectorate,” Ignis disclosed. I shot him a look that said “seriously?”

_You know this woman’s name and who she is but the name ‘Ardyn’ doesn’t ring a bell?_

“You should know,” Ms. Claustra continued, “we have Lady Lunafreya in our care. And… the empire demands we surrender her.”

_Oh shit._

“What?” Noctis hissed.

“Yet I am loathe to acquiesce unless we stand to profit. Hence I’ve come to discuss terms… with the King of Lucis.”

 _I’m glad_ somebody _is recognizing his new title._

“If you’ve a mind to talk, come to my estate.”

She departed. Weskham assured us her heart was in the right place. I doubted that a bit, but he lived here, not us. Might as well trust him.

The sun had been long gone by the time we reached the Leville. I guessed it was a chain hotel. At least we could count on there being one when we needed it. I sat and waited as the guys planned the rooming situation and then got said rooms. My body was slumping over slightly. I was still exhausted from everything that had happened so far.

“So, uh,” Noct got my attention, “Iris mentioned you might need some space, so… We got you your own room.”

“What?” I stood quickly. “You didn’t have to do that! Why?”

“You’ve been traveling with four guys,” Gladio reasoned. “Four very busy guys.”

“Not to mention your obvious introversion,” Ignis said. “There wasn’t much we could do in Lucis, but since these might be your last days on Eos…”

“We figured we’d give you some space,” Noct finished. “To… think and stuff.”

I didn’t know what else to do except hug him. Prompto found it adorable and joined in. Then Gladio did. And then Ignis. Dammit. I felt like crying again.

 

We got lost more trying to find the First Secretary’s estate. I had offered to stay back in case it’d help things go more smoothly, but they dragged me along anyway. The sooner I could see Luna, the better. As the terms were being discussed, I hung in the background. The soldiers looked French. It was off putting with the strong Italian vibe I got from the majority of the city.

I didn’t pay much attention to what they said. Sure, I support my friends all that I can, but political matters are not my thing. What I did hear, though, was stuff about keeping the citizens safe when Leviathan was awoken. Again, I didn’t understand why they’d let this happen.

“Assign three of your own for the evacuation,” Ms. Claustra said. “Whom you choose is up to you. The rite will be initiated a week from now. You have that time to decide.”

The talk ended with a handshake. When Noctis turned to lead us out, his eyes caught mine and he looked back.

“Uh, hold on,” he said. “Um, if- if I may…”

“Yes, what is it?”

“My friend here really needs to speak with Luna. It’s urgent. Do you think she’d… be able to see her? Just for a moment?”

“Hmm… Is it an emergency?”

Noct and I exchanged a glance. I shrugged.

“Uh, not exactly,” he answered.

“Then I am afraid not. I’m sure you understand we cannot risk anything happening to the Oracle.”

“R-right. Thanks anyway.”

All the tension from being brought into the spotlight dropped my shoulders as we stepped out into the sunlight. I didn’t like being in there. My every move had been watched by the guards. It was unbelievably uncomfortable.

“Sorry,” Noct said gently. “I’m sure you can see Luna after the rite.”

I nodded. “I have more time to spend with you guys.”

We spent the rest of the day touring the city. Prompto was determined to get me to buy any sort of souvenir that wasn’t a book. I got dragged into store by store by store. Noct eventually got tired of all the rushing around. Nothing was bought except lunch and a small snack in the afternoon. But then I spotted a gelato stand right after said snack. Excitement prevailed. It took some convincing, but Prompto and I managed to beg Ignis to let us all get some.

“We _are_ here to ‘study the culinary arts’,” I mentioned. He couldn’t argue with that. Mint chip, here I come.

We arrived back near the port in the late afternoon. The gelato was amazing and I would be getting more later. So good.

“So Noct,” Prompto said, jumping up ahead to join him. “Wanna check out that arena we heard about?”

“That did sound pretty cool,” Gladio added.

“Sure,” Noct said, “why not?”

We reached the Leville. There was a gondola nearby they could ride to find the one that transported them to the arena. I stopped at the hotel.

“Do… Do you guys mind if I sit this one out?” I asked. “Maybe explore a bit more? I don’t really want to see animals pitted against each other for nothing more than entertainment…”

“Not at all,” Noctis told me. “Go ahead. Just be careful. We’ve got our phones if you need anything.”

“Try not to get lost,” Ignis advised. “We’re not sure when we’ll be back.”

“Thanks. Don’t stay out too late,” I said. As they boarded a gondola, I climbed the stairs to my room. I stayed there for a rather long time. They were right. I really did need the time alone. Spending hours upon hours with four people for a month drained me dry. I just daydreamed the time away. When the sky grew dark and the city lit up, I decided it best to find something to eat or Ignis would scold me for not taking care of myself. They had texted me they were still at the arena. It was enjoyable to them, so I was glad they were happy.

Altissia was a marvel at night. Was there anything in this place that wasn’t astounding? I climbed stairs and then more stairs. Long stretches of streets over woven other streets had me traveling through alleys and bridges. I came to a square with a small street performer band. I watched for a bit. The jazz they played was intricate and I found myself walking to beat when I spotted some more stairs to climb. Up and up it went until a little open area came into sight. It was very high up. A potted tree and some flowers decorated the terrace. A dark fence kept it all inside.

“Wow…” I breathed. The view from up there was… Was… Words couldn’t describe it. The waterfalls could seen in the dark, the lights of the city sparkling from down below. People bustled about on the streets, looking small and insignificant.

The stars greeted me politely. They apologized for mocking me before. I smiled up at them. How was Earth, I asked.

It’s faring alright without you, they said.

Can you tell me what’s going on? Does anyone miss me? Have they even noticed I’ve gone?

There was no reply. I glanced back down.

Are my parents at least doing okay?

We’re sure they are, the stars assured me.

Can you show me to be sure?

We cannot, they denied.

Could they show me the way home?

...Did I even _want_ to go home?

_Do you want to go home?_

_I… I think so. I don’t think I could stay for very long without eventually wishing I could return._

_But here you have a purpose. Here you can help people. You don’t have to work behind the scenes anymore!_

_But I like working behind the scenes! And I can help people at home, too._

_Not the same way you can here. You’re not cut out to be a doctor. You’re too squeamish for that._

_I’m sure there’s lots of things to help with._

_But your friends here understand you._

_So do the ones at home! I love them!_

_You love these ones, too! They’re like your brothers! How could you just leave Noct after all you’ve been through together?_

“I…” I whispered, fighting down the dry, tight feeling at the top of my throat. “I don’t know… if I can…”

The pull in my chest began again. A sudden longing to be with Noct and Iggy and Prom and Glad yanked on my heart. I should have really been with them right then. We worked so well together. We were a family.

_But I miss home so much. I want to see Pippi and Laura again. I want to see my parents and my cat. I want to wake up in my room to my Loki plushie and cuddle the hell out of it. I want to watch the Avengers again and Supernatural, too. I want to read Lord of the Rings and watch the Hobbit. I want to see pictures of my childhood so I don’t forget._

_So I don’t forget._

_So I don’t… forget…_

“When the light is running low,” I sang softly, “And the shadows start to grow. And the places that you know… seem like fantasy.”

A breeze blew by, rustling the leaves of the plants.

“There’s a light inside your soul, that’s still shining in the cold, with the truth… the promise in our hearts… ...Don’t forget… I’m with you in… the dark…”

“Lovely view, isn’t it?”

I almost jumped out of my skin. The voice was _right behind me._ Panting, I slowly shifted around, playing with the ends of my scarf. The person standing there gave me a smirk.

“Hello, my dear.”

“Oh, hi, Ardyn…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My birthday was on Saturday!! And guess who got FINAL FANTASY XII?!  
> Ivalice, here I come~


	35. Comminationēs et empyreae declarationēs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What does Ardyn want...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “Threats and fiery revelations”

The esteemed chancellor of Niflheim stood before me. I said nothing, not knowing what to say. A gust of salty smelling wind blew by. He stepped closer. I backed up against the railing.

“Did they leave you all on your own again?” he asked. I shook my head. “Oh? Then what brings you here, all alone?”

“Tha- th-that’s…” I stuttered. “That’s personal.”

“Hmm… Is it? You know, I’ve been waiting for a moment like this.”

He took another step. Anxious fear shot through me. My skin tingled like I was shaking. Ardyn was blocking the only way out.

“Would you mind answering a few…”

Step.

“...questions for me?”

I gulped. My eyes were wide, I knew. I probably looked like a deer in the headlights. Ardyn’s aura screamed instability. Something was very, very wrong with him.

_Politician on politician. What would Noct or Vayne do?_

“Depends on the question,” I managed to say, voice cracking slightly. This was the very thing the guys had been trying to prevent. How did he know I was here?!

“Well, the first is: _who. are. you?”_

His whimsical voice deepened into a warning growl. He didn’t seem happy about my presence.

“Uh, a person?” I answered uneasily.

_“Wrong answer.”_

A shot hand shot out to grip the railing. I flinched, trapped.

“Who are you, where did you come from, and what are you doing here?”

“_______, Hammerhead, traveling with friends.”

“Your _full_ name, please.”

_Give him a fake name._

_He already knows my name._

_Fake last name, then._

“________ Solidor.”

Wow.

“You’re not a Caelum, then?” Ardyn asked. His tall form loomed over my small one. I was thoroughly intimidated now.

“Not that I know of. Although, Noct and I are like siblings, if that helps.”

_STOP GIVING THE ENEMY INFORMATION._

“Siblings?” Ardyn seethed. “So he’s like a _brother_ to you.”

“Uh, if that’s how you want to interpret it…”

“Do _not_ play coy with me. I can see right through you. A healer with ties to an uncrowned king. How utterly _pathetic_ of the gods to taunt me in this way.”

“Uh, what?”

“Why did they send you here?”

“Who?”

“What purpose do you serve? Is this a means to throw a _wrench_ in my carefully constructed plans?”

“Plans?”

He surged forward, pressing against me. The sharp point of a dagger showed its face. I whimpered. His head lowered close to mine. Something glistened in his eyes. Something dark. Something _obscenely_ dark.

“Give me one reason why I shouldn’t kill you now,” he ordered. My heart jumped into terror mode. _Now_ I was shaking.

_My first day in Altissia and I’m already being threatened._

“Well?”

_Play it cool, play it cool. Think, think, think!!_

Nothing came to my thoughts. I just stared at him with eyes as big as plates and a blank mind. He observed my reactions carefully. The tip of the knife came to the underside of my chin.

“P-please don’t,” I found myself saying.

“Is that all? You’ll beg for your life with no reason to keep it?”

I closed my eyes.

“Yes,” I whispered.

A moment passed.

The pressure left my body, dagger and all. I let out a long breath. Ardyn watched me with an unreadable expression.

“Pathetic,” he spat. His anger sat in his eyes behind the pretense of disgust. It was a madness I’d never seen before in anyone. “For them to replace me with _this._ Let me make one thing clear to you, ______ Solidor.”

If I hadn’t been so scared, I would’ve laughed so hard at the fact that he had actually bought my fake last name.

“The gods care not for you or your friends. Whatever reason they have intertwined your fates will only lead to your untimely demise. Should you stand in the way of destiny, _I **will** cut you down._ Am I understood?”

I nodded shakily.

“Good. I’d refrain from disclosing our little _discussion_ with your dear _king,_ if I were you. Lest there be _repercussions.”_

With one last glare, he turned and stalked down the stairs.

I stood there for a good while in shock. When I finally came to my senses, I hurried down the streets of Altissia and back to the Leville.

 

**Day 1 of Mission: Fellowship of the King**

 

Ignis knew immediately something was wrong the next day. I stayed mostly silently all through breakfast and then through to lunch. I refused to look any of them in the eye. At first he thought my depression was getting to me again. My jumpiness when spoken to told him otherwise. So, he found a moment during lunch to gently corner me.

In other words, he followed me to the bathroom and waited till I came out.

“______, a word, if you don’t mind,” he said. I swallowed and nodded. “You’ve been rather anxious today. More anxious than usual. Did something happen last night?”

“Uh… No…”

“______.”

“I can’t tell you.”

“Whyever not?”

“...I just can’t.”

“Did someone bother you?”

“......”

“So that’s a yes, then.”

_Wait. Ardyn said not to tell Noctis, not Ignis. And what if I don’t speak to Ignis but let him ask yes or no questions?_

I nodded.

“Was it someone from the empire?”

Nod.

“Was it Ravus?”

Shake.

“The chancellor?”

...Hesitant nod.

“Blast… What did he want? You can tell me, _____, I won’t let anything happen to you. You have my word.”

“Just wanted to know who I am.”

“And what did you tell him?”

I answered quietly so only he could hear.

“Uh, he asked for my name, place of origin, and reason for ‘being here’,” I told him. “I said ______ Solidor, Hammerhead, and traveling with friends.”

Ignis nodded in approval.

“We’ll have to be extra careful,” he said. “Did he threaten you at all?”

My eyes stung for a moment, like tears wanted to spring up. I nodded. Ignis became visibly angry. He pushed his glasses up, eyebrows furrowing. The way he stiffened had tension radiating from his body.

“Alright,” he said. “We’ll tell the others, quietly, and we won’t let you go anywhere alone. Is that alright with you?”

I nodded. We walked back to the table. Our friends looked up, ready to tease us for being gone so long together. My very unhappy, frowning face calmed them down. Ignis told them what I had communicated in a low voice so no one around could hear him but us.

“Next time we see him, he’s a dead man,” Gladio growled. “I knew there was something off about that guy.”

Noctis was simmering silently. None of us dared to ask him to speak his thoughts. He’d probably explode and blow our cover.

“So what do we do?” Prompto asked. I’d never seen an angry Prompto before. I was starting to get scared of how calm he was keeping himself. “I’ve got a few bullets with his name on them.”

“Nothing drastic,” Ignis said hurriedly. “I’m just as furious as you are, but we can’t risk our safety, and more importantly, we can’t risk _____’s safety. She was told not to tell, so you’d do well to keep your voices down.”

“We keep her in sight,” Gladio said. “None of us are going anywhere without a buddy. Got it?”

Prompto, Noctis, Ignis, and I nodded together. No one would be getting cornered by any imperials again.

After lunch, Prompto was determined to see me smile. He rounded up me and Noctis and led us to the area near the Oracle’s wedding dress. Ignis and Gladio lagged behind, enjoying our antics. I was pulled into almost every store they could find: clothing stores, gift shops, even a few antique places. Most everything was out of our price range. Gladio suggested asking Weskham for bounties. Noctis dubbed it a good idea and they parted with us remaining three. Ignis followed me and Prompto on our little shopping adventure. I got flashbacks to my first night in Eos.

“Oh! Over here!” Prompto said, pulling me to yet another shop. “They’ve got T-shirts!”

The clerk at the counter said they were having a special sale for the rite. The new T-shirts we were looking at had an image of the Tidemother on them and said “I survived the Wrath of Leviathan.” It was a tad morbid concerning what was coming next week, but I did like it, actually. Prompto convinced me to buy it mostly as a joke. Ignis shook his head as we paid.

Then I spotted a little cart right outside the shop. I asked if it was what I thought it was. Prompto got excited with me. After a few minutes, we managed to get Ignis to agree to more gelato.

“Just don’t ruin your appetites for dinner,” Ignis told us with a relenting grin. Prompto cheered and I clapped my hands happily. Once our treats were in hand, we found an empty bench to rest on.

“So we have six more days?” I asked, taking a lick of gelato. Ignis nodded.

“Man, it’s coming up soon,” Prompto said, leaning back. “Kinda nervous, to be honest. Something tells me Titan was way tamer.”

“As you should be,” Ignis said. “Leviathan is most certainly the most headstrong of the Six. Earning her trust will not be easy.”

_“Why_ are they letting her destroy the city?” I asked. “I know Noct needs her blessing, but is there not _any_ other way to get it?”

“I’m afraid not. I must admit that I didn’t think the First Secretary would allow us to continue. But given that Noct has her trust, it will be worth it.”

Anger started to bubble in my veins. My eye twitched How could they just sit here and accept it?!

“Worth a whole city destroyed?” I said through my teeth.

“Were there any other way, we would take it,” Ignis said.

“That’s not fair. Just because she’s a goddess doesn’t mean she gets to do what she wants.”

Ignis paused mid-bite. He observed me for a moment before speaking.

“I suppose your frustration in being sent here against your will fuels your words?” he asked. Prompto began to pay more attention, turning his head to see us.

“I guess,” I said, lifting one hand and shrugging. “But there’s six of them, right, and like, _millions_ of you! Not to mention they’ve been asleep for thousands of years, doing _nothing._ Why should Noctis need their _permission_ to take Lucis back?”

Silence. Conflicted tension rose, an air of uneasiness surrounding both Prompto and Ignis. I boiled quietly, waiting for them to respond.

“______…” Ignis began. “Did… something else occur last night for you to suddenly become so passionate about this?”

It came to my attention that I hadn’t been like this before. Usually I preferred to remain neutral in the matters of their religion seeing as I didn’t know too much about it. Now, I had pretty much met two of their gods, one of which had tried to kill Noctis. But I had been reading the Cosmogony whenever it was to be found and after mulling over my conversation with Vayne and that whole Materia-Spritus fiasco, I had realized that I had a say in my own life. That everyone should have a say in their own lives. And the fact that we had to let someone destroy so many people’s homes and history and culture _really_ pissed me off.

“No,” I muttered. “I just gained a new perspective after actually thinking about stuff.”

Ignis and Prompto exchanged a worried glance. The latter didn’t know what to say in this situation, so Ignis decided to end the discussion before it got out of hand.

“There’s no changing fate, ______,” he said finally. I slumped, gelato finished. “You, most of all, should know that.”

When we joined up with Noctis and Gladiolus at the Leville later, Ignis said nothing of my outburst to them. I wasn’t sure whether to feel bad about that or relieved he didn’t think it important enough to mention. He did, however, suggest I stay in my room to “cool down” for a while. They assumed I was overheated and I was basically under Ignis’ Mom Friend guise of “go to your room.”

I bristled the whole way up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I lied about shutting up about Vayne lol  
> His words actually lit a fire in dear Reader.


	36. Aure perennius

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The week long interlude comes and goes very quickly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “More lasting than bronze”
> 
> This chapter details the last happier moments between Reader and each of the boys. They each get their own little segment.  
> Enjoy :D

**Day 3 of Mission: Fellowship of the King**

 

A day for exploration passed and then came day three. The guys were going to take the boat out to go see something Weskham had told them about. Some sort of lesser god of fishing. And of course, Noctis was ecstatic. I, on the other hand, was completely done with his odd hobby and had taken to daydreaming. I was thinking about how my copy and Noctis’ were doing in what I dubbed the “Dissidia world.” The thought of us getting into all sorts of trouble with our new friends left a small smile on my face.

“Uh, _______, you okay?” Prompto asked as Noct drove us out of the harbor. I jerked up from my thoughts.

“What?” I asked. Blink, blink.

“You just… had this smile on your face.”

“What, I can’t smile?”

“I didn’t say that! It’s just that you usually don’t, uh, show much emotion when you’re spacing out…?”

Oh. Oops.

“I just thought of a meme,” I lied.

“Another one?” Gladio asked.

“What’s this one?” Noct asked from the front.

“Anyone have anything I can throw?” I inquired. My smile widened into a mischievous smirk. Prompto held up a can of a drink he had finished earlier. I wasn’t sure about throwing it in the ocean of all places, but maybe when we stopped, we could retrieve before something tried to snack on it. “Perfect, actually. I’ll show you when we get… wherever we’re going.”

The lesser god’s name was Bismarck. Why they named him after the capital of North Dakota, I don’t know. What I do know is that they decided to follow some _seagulls_ to find him. I thought that was… well, not the most _efficient_ way to do it. But those were the instructions they received.

Noctis circled around small islands, weaving between them until we found the seagulls again. I still thought it was a waste of time. As I sat on the seat furthest to the back, I checked my phone out of boredom.

“Oh!” Prompto called out. “I see them! Over there!”

In a space near a larger island, the water teemed with fish. The flock of birds circled us overhead. Noctis stopped the dock and weighed anchor. Prompto and I rushed over to the front of the boat. I’d never seen so many fish in one natural place (I had seen many an aquarium). We all watched in amazement as a large mass broke the water’s surface.

“Woah, look at the size of that thing,” Gladio said.

“A divine presence indeed,” Ignis added.

“He’s really here!” Noctis said, leaning slightly over the edge of the boat.

“And he’s enormous!” Prompto exclaimed. “Like, gi-normous!”

“Uhhh…” I squinted, making sure I was seeing this right. I’d never been whale watching, but… This didn’t look like a deity worthy beast. I was expecting, like, a sea monster or something.

“Get a load of this, Noct,” Gladio pointed out. “There’s fish everywhere.”

“Easy to see why he received the anglers’ apotheosis,” Ignis said.

“Well, guess we gotta pay our respects, too!” Noct declared.

“Um, I hate to bring down the mood,” I said, snapping a picture of the whale, “but you know that’s a _narwhal,_ right?”

Four faces turned toward me. I shrunk back a little.

“A what?” Gladio asked.

“A narwhal?” I repeated. “Y’know, unicorn-style whale? You do have whales, right?”

I got blank stares.

“Here and there,” Ignis answered. “There aren’t too many of them.”

“Huh…” I said, feeling a bit awkward.

“You have more of these where you’re from?” Noct asked with wide, excited eyes.

_Wow, he must actually really love fishing._

“Well, yeah,” I told him. “I mean, not _everywhere,_ but it’s not like they’re unheard of or anything.”

“How much ocean does your planet have?” Gladio asked.

“Earth is approximately seventy percent water, most of it ocean. We got lotsa whales and fish and stuff. Although… we know more about space than we do about the bottoms of the deepest seas.”

“How come?” Prompto questioned. Noctis was getting his fishing gear out. I dramatically looked up at the sky.

“NASA’s urge to leave the planet grows ever stronger.”

Noctis fished for a _while._ After Bismarck had finished feeding and swam away, I had gone back to the seats and sprawled out. To pass the time, I did various things on my phone. The Notes app had been home to several accounts of our travels for awhile now. There was a color by number game to keep me from growing too bored. Pinterest was, unfortunately, not working, so I just used their internet for memes and funny posts.

The haul was huge. I had no idea what they were planning to do with all the fish Noct caught. Maybe sell it to a vendor or something…? Would they even take it? The guys moved the bucketed fish to somewhere below deck so the smell wouldn't suffocated us. I just watched.

“Sure you’re a king, Noct?” I asked. “Fishing seems to be your calling.”

“Ha, I wish,” he called back from the captain’s chair, “almost.”

“Wait!” Prompto shouted. “________ never showed us the meme!”

We gathered at the bow. I instructed Prompto on what to say and do. When he was ready, we began.

“_______, want some?” he recited, handing me his empty drink can. I took it and pretended to look inside.

“This bitch empty!” I exclaimed. I pulled my arm back and launched the can into the water, as far as I could throw it. _“YEET!”_

This became a recurring joke. That’s how much they liked it. Sometimes you could hear Noct say it before he warped.

The ride back Altissia seemed a lot shorter than coming out. Noctis had no problem finding the water bridge leading in. I kept my seat as we rolled along. Er, floated along.

Evening was falling by the time we got back. Prompto and Noctis were itching to go back to the arena to see some rare creatures they were presenting. Gladio would’ve gone with them, but…

“I need to make sure _______ is prepared for the rite,” he said. He turned to me. “C’mon, we got some shits to take out.”

With a groaning grumble, I followed him through the maze-like streets of Altissia.

The spot we came to was a secluded corner off a cute little square with shops and kiosks. We walked down the stairs and turned left, went under some bridges, and came to the corner. Two samurai-looking daemons appeared and were upon us instantly.

“Like you mean it!” Gladio shouted at my meager slashes. “Pretend they’re your worst enemy!”

“I don’t have a worst enemy!” I called back. I swiftly sidestepped the samurai’s cut. My sword swung out and nicked its side. Another slash did more damage.

“Then pretend he’s the one who took your home away!”

Boiling rage welled up in my veins. I could feel my body shaking. Lightning cracked overhead. I stabbed at the daemon with Ithilcalad, which had lit up with darkness. It swung at me and I blocked. A shove had it stumbling back slightly. I lashed out right. I lashed out left. Diagonally, up, down, left to right, right to left. I was blind. All I could see was the homesickness and pain of not knowing if I could and wanted to go home.

The beast perished. I kept swinging.

“Woah, woah, woah,” Gladio said. He rushed to my side and held my arms back so I calmed down. “Easy. I didn’t mean to rile you up _that_ much.”

“Huh?” I snapped out of my trance and slumped back. Gladio let me go. “What did I do?”

“You just about set stone on fire. Look.”

The brick around was scorched and smoking. It wasn’t like a fire had started, though. It looked like several lightning strikes had found their marks. I let Ithilcalad shimmer away back to Noct’s inventory.

 _“I_ did that?” I breathed.

“Yeah,” Gladio said. “You need to get those emotions of yours under control.”

I got immediate flashbacks to the Captain Marvel movie that had come out earlier that year.

“We’ll see,” I said. “Sometimes it’s a good thing to let them out.”

“I just don’t want you to hurt yourself, okay? I saw the darkness around your sword. Scared me for a second.”

“I’m fine, promise. Are you hurt?”

“Nah, I’m good. Let’s head on to the next.”

 

**Day 4 of Mission: Fellowship of the King**

 

The following morning I was sore all over. I got shoved into a wall by some giant imps on the last hunt. When we got back to the Leville I went to bed almost immediately.

It was nice not having to get up so early. I stayed in bed, awake, daydreaming and messing around on what phones apps Eos had to offer. I missed breakfast and it was right before lunch that someone came eagerly knocking on my door.

“_______?” Prompto’s voice came from the other side. “You in there?”

I let out a small groan and hauled myself out of bed to open the door.

“Whaaat?” I stretched.

“I found a cool spot for some pictures in a garden nearby! You gotta come with me.”

I yawned. “Where’s Noct?”

“He and Gladio went to find some places in the city for more fishing. And Ignis is taste testing for recipes.”

“What happened to the buddy system?”

“He’s at Maagho, so we’re gonna meet him there later. Now come on! Before the sun goes down and the good lighting’s gone!”

“It’s just almost noon, Prom. Alright, let me just get dressed first.”

“Yes! I’ll meet you downstairs!”

The place Prompto nearly dragged me to was a gondola ride away. He warmed up his photography skills by capturing some images of the surrounding city. They all looked amazing.

_Man, Prompto really does have a talent for this._

I followed my bubbly friend up some stairs and over a bridge. It seemed like we were near the First Secretary’s estate. We passed through a courtyard with live music playing and then crossed the road that led to said estate. A flash of white caught my eye. There was hardly anyone in this section besides some guards, so it wasn’t hard to spot. My heart almost stopped and my feet actually did.

Someone was coming out of the building.

Someone _very familiar_ was coming out of the building.

Someone I had _really_ been hoping not to see again was coming out of the building.

“______?” Prompto said, realizing I had stopped. We were partially in the shade of the awning on the building behind us. “You okay?”

“Is that Ravus?” I muttered, turning my head so he could hear me. He looked where my gaze was set and fumbled with his camera as he nearly dropped it.

“Uh, y-y-yeah, I- I think so…”

Neither of us said anything or moved. We watched Ravus emerge from the shade of the estate. His white clothing had me squinting, it was so bright. His face was scrunched up with frustration, his metal hand curling into a fist and then relaxing repeatedly. After a few, silent seconds, he shook his head and made to walk away when he spotted us. Prompto and I stiffened.

No one said a word. Ravus didn’t pay Prompto any mind. It was me he made eye contact with. My hands felt shaky, heart fluttering with fear. My toes began tapping nervously in my shoe. I was frozen, unable to look away. Ravus narrowed his eyes as our staredown continued. Prompto snapped out of it and glanced between me and Ravus over and over. I straightened my back, petrified but unwilling to let the man I had stood up to make me cower.

Finally someone broke the silence.

“H-hey, R-Ravus,” Prompto said shakily. “Long time, no see…”

Ravus huffed and turned briskly. We watched as he stormed away. Soon he was gone. My whole body drooped as I let go of the tension I had been holding.

“Well, _that_ took a few years off my life,” I said, laughing slightly.

“No kidding. Should we head back and tell the others?”

“Let’s get to the garden or somewhere public. I’ll text Ignis.”

“Good idea.”

 

 _To Iggy:_ Hey, we just saw the Oracle’s brother - how do you spell his name? - by the estate we went to the other day. Should we come back or-?

  **Iggy:** You saw Ravus?

 _Me:_ yeah we were just passing by and he came walking out

 **Iggy:** He was probably trying to see Lady Lunafreya. Did he say anything?

 _Me:_ nah we just had a staredown, me and him

 **Iggy:** Did he seem hostile at all?

 _Me:_ uhhh

 _Me:_ no???

 _Me:_ a bit grumpy, but he didn’t attack us or anything

 **Iggy:** You should continue on, then. Just keep an eye out for any imperials. And let me know if anything else happens.

 _Me:_ Will do *salutes*

 

“Iggy says we can keep going,” I relayed to Prompto. “We just gotta be careful.”

“Right. Let’s go, then.”

The garden Prompto led me to turned out to be a miniature botanical garden. My allergies almost immediately began to bother me but I didn’t let it deter me. They had a whole section of carnations and orchids. Prompto got a few secret shots of me marveling at all the pretty colors. Then I helped him find places to get better pictures.

A small group of kids was playing by a patch of daisies. The sun shined sweetly overhead and provided an innocent view of childhood. Then we found a cute couple exchanging roses among the hydrangeas. Some people had gathered around one of the gardeners, who was explaining the technicalities of caring for the daffodils and lilies. That led the way to an open space with benches and more beautiful plant life.

“Uh, hey, ______?” Prompto said. I turned to him. “I really need to find the restroom. You keep going, okay? I’ll find you later.”

“Alright,” I said. “Just be careful you don’t run into anyone suspicious.”

“You too!”

I entered the courtyard of hopes and dreams and found it to be full of golden flowers.

“Oh wow…” I breathed. My time playing Undertale came rushing back. The golden flowers in that game were ever present, and they had found a special place in my heart.

_The golden… flowers… in my town… Let… me… see them when I… fall down…_

_I’m sorry…! Please stay with me! The shield above won’t let me leave…_

_I’ll always be determined!_

Those lyrics from the fanmade musical rang strong in my head. How fitting they seemed for my own situation. With a will all their own, my feet carried me to the edge of the square of flowers. I smiled down at them, glad to find something familiar and with sentimental value. I gazed around for somewhere to sit and wait for Prompto. There was a spot on a bench next to an old lady watching her grandchildren.

I spent the first few minutes waiting humming the Undertale theme and tapping along with my fingers. I observed the people around me, their enjoyment of the garden making me happy.

“That’s a lovely tune you’re humming,” the old lady beside me said. I jumped slightly. She chuckled. “My apologies. May I ask what it is?”

“Oh, um,” I stuttered, unsure of how to talk to a stranger. “It’s, uh, from a… video game… It has golden flowers, so… I just… Yeah…”

“They are beautiful, aren’t they? Just as pretty as the sylleblossoms in Tenebrae.”

“Sylleblossoms?”

“Oh, yes. Gorgeous little, blue flowers cover the fields there. They make their crowns out of them.”

“Oh, that must be pretty.”

A wistful smile greeted me. “They are. I’ve heard the Oracle sometimes carries them with her, as symbol of hope.”

Before I could figure out how to respond, a small cry interrupted us. One of the lady’s grandchildren had tripped and scraped her knee. Her older sister ran over to see what was wrong as she began crying.

“Oh, Emilia!” the old lady exclaimed, standing quickly. “Are you alright? Let Grandma take a look.”

I followed them, wondering if they’d let me heal her. The scrape was pretty bad. At least, to a kid, it was. I watched awkwardly to see what would happen.

“It hurts!” Emilia cried. “It hurts!”

“It’s just a scratch,” her sister said. “You’ll be fine.”

“No, I won’t! I’m dying, Grandma! I’m dying!”

“Here,” I found myself saying, kneeling down. “Let me see.”

There wasn’t actually that much blood, but it clearly disturbed little Emilia. I gave her an awkward but hopefully reassuring smile.

“You’re gonna be okay.”

“C-can…” She sniffed, tears still falling. “Can you fix it?”

“I can. Here…”

I let my hand glow turquoise.

“When I got hurt when I was kid, my mom would always sprinkle fairy dust over it to make it better.”

I pretended to sprinkle said fairy dust over the scrape. I let my fingers gently brush against it so my magic would actually do the healing. The blood disappeared and the scratch was gone.

“See? Good as new.”

Emilia gasped.

“Grandma, didja see that?!” she said in a loud whisper. “It’s gone! Like in a princess story!”

“Well, I’ll be,” the grandmother said with a big smile. “Just like magic!”

“It _is_ magic, Grandma! She must really be a princess!”

“Ah, well, not really, I-” I tried to protest. Emilia leaned over to her sister.

“What kind of princess is she, Nessa?” she whispered. “What castle is she from?”

“What kingdom do you hail from?” Nessa asked me, playing along. “Her Highness of Altissia wishes to know.”

“Uhh…” I gulped. Ummm… More fake things to come up with. Might as well be consistent. Where did Vayne say he was from? “I am _______ Solidor of Archadia and Ivalice.”

_Forgive me, Vayne. And Vaan, too, I guess._

“We have to make her a friend!” Emilia declared.

“You are a guest of the realm!” Nessa said. “Come, let us welcome you!”

They pulled me to the golden flowers to sit. I let them, afraid to back out lest they become heartbroken. When Prompto found me later, I had been crowned with with a ring of golden flowers.

 

**Day 5 of Mission: Fellowship of the King**

 

“So, _______, any idea on what to take back with you?”

Today it was just me and Ignis. I was starting to suspect they were taking turns spending time with me and I was definitely alright with that. It was sweet.

Ignis and I were wandering the streets and canals of Altissia with no set destination. He let me ramble on about the architecture of the place. I loved the mixed Italian and French feel. I couldn’t tell exactly what kind of style it was. Was it rococo? Neoclassicism? Arts and crafts? It was a style all its own, a mixture of what I had learned in my architecture class back home.

“Um… Hmm…” I thought for a bit. “Maybe a map of the world? I can’t explain it with words, but I think that’d be nice.”

It would be great to have a small diagram of all the places I had been on Eos. I could map out my journey and maybe turn it into a novel one day.

“A sound idea,” Ignis agreed. “I’m sure we can find one somewhere.”

We managed to find an alley of vintage travel shops. Actually, it more mystic than anything. A few fortune tellers here, shops full of nature-themed souvenirs that let one stay in touch with the land. I found it to be a nice change from the rest of the cosmopolitan city. One of the shops had what we were looking for. It was full of navigation trinkets. Real maps and star charts covered almost every surface. There was a whole table full of old compasses. I spent a few minutes looking at those. Finally, I spotted an old, faded map of Eos.

Then Ignis told me he’d pay for it and to wait outside. I did so without questioning him, knowing he wouldn’t give me a straight answer.

I leaned against the outside wall. People passed left and right, doing who knows what and going about their own days. The faint smell of incense from of the stores wafted out into the street, reminding me of special occasions in church when the priest and deacon would spread the stuff around the congregation.

Someone was staring at me. I could feel their gaze and it was both uncomfortable and bearable at the same time. Whoever it was wasn’t hostile, just curious. I gazed around.

It was a woman sitting cross legged diagonally from me on the other side of the alley. Her expression was unreadable, but I could tell she meant no harm. She wasn’t exactly like the mediums I had seen on the streets back home, but she resembled one enough for me to make that conclusion. Really, she looked like a normal person. Her dirty blonde hair was pulled back and half hidden under a thin shawl to keep the sunlight out. Her long magenta shirt went well with the black pants she wore. A table with an intricate cloth over it sat in front of her, a deck of cards resting on it.

_They have tarot here?_

_Shit, she probably knows I don’t belong here._

My curiosity got the better of me. Instead of looking away, I cautiously approached her setup. She gave me a reassuring smile and gestured for me to sit down. I did so reluctantly, aware of the consequences of consulting things like this.

Other gods had brought me to this world. Surely God could forgive me looking for answers from this person if I couldn’t see Luna.

“You’re nervous,” the woman observed. I nodded. “I know lots of people see things like this as evil, but I assure you it’s because they don’t really know or understand what it is.”

“I know,” I said. “I just… Well… Um… How do I say this…”

“You caught me staring at you. Sorry. There’s just this… _weird_ aura around you. I’ve never seen anything like it.”

“Yeah, I bet. Um… Can you… tell me who it is you ask your questions to…?”

She smiled. “Usually the gods and spirits. Nothing evil. That would end poorly for everyone.”

“Okay… I’ve never done this before so…”

She shook her head. “Don’t worry. Most people haven’t. I’m Melina, by the way.”

“______. So… How does this work?”

“We start with a question. But… I hope you don’t mind me asking where you’re from first.”

“Uh, that’s… complicated.”

I looked around for any suspicious characters. No one. Ignis must still be in line. I leaned forward.

“I’m only telling you this since you might actually believe me, but… I’m not exactly… from Eos…?”

Melina’s eyes lit up with both interest and skepticism.

“Really?” she asked. “No wonder you’re so… blurry. But… Why don’t we let the cards tell us more?”

“Sure, why not.”

She began to shuffle and separate the tarot deck. I watched anxiously, scared of what I might be told. A weird presence fell on my chest with the guilt of defying the order of not doing something like this. I ignored it, needing answers.

“Alright,” Melina said. “Usually we’d take the three off the top, but something’s telling me we need to do this differently. Choose one of these.”

Three different stacks were in front of me. Still ignoring the weight on my chest, I let my intuition pick the left one. Melina set the other two to the side and spread out the cards in the chosen stack in a circle with one in the middle.

“Okay, now choose three. Doesn’t matter which. Just pick whatever feels right.”

There was one in the top right that came first. Then the one to its left. The final card was off to the left side of the circle. Melina cleared the rest of the cards away and carefully made sure the order of my chosen cards stayed.

“So this one denotes the situation you’re in right now. Let’s take a… Oh.”

The card depicted a tower, burning and crumbling down. Pretty accurate for what my life was at that moment. Melina let out a whistle.

“Alright, so…” She took a moment to gather her thoughts. “The Tower represents chaos and change. You’ve recently gone through something that turned your whole world upside down and now you’re trying to find your way through. Adds up with what you told me. Any idea how you got here?”

“Divine intervention,” I said quietly. “Can’t say I’m too happy about it.”

“I don’t blame you. Usually the Tower has a lot of negative connotations. I try not to let that deter me or my clients but you… Man, I’m so sorry.”

I shrugged. “I’ve been here for about a month now. I’ve made good friends who have helped me. I just don’t know what to do now. If I can’t see the Oracle, then…”

“That’s where card number two comes in.”

She flipped it over so we could see. I felt a presence behind me and turned to see Ignis standing there with interest.

“Don’t mind me,” he said. “I shan’t interfere.”

The second card had a full moon on, situated between two towers. A dog and a wolf howled up at the moon as a crayfish crawled up from the water.

“The Moon represents your fears and anxieties, which I can tell you have a lot of. When you came to Eos, you pushed your fears of not returning home down but they’re resurfacing and overwhelming you.”

I nodded.

“My advice would be to not go making any hasty decisions just yet. You probably don’t have all the information you need about your situation. And, seeing as this is the Moon, I think you’ll be able to talk Lady _Luna_ freya soon. She’ll be able to answer your questions.”

I let out a long, relieved sigh. Ignis remained quiet.

“Thank goodness,” I said. Melina smiled and turned over the third card. A man and woman were standing naked in a field, looking up at an angel.

“All Major Arcana, huh?” she muttered. “Figures. This one is called the Lovers card. It’s name and meaning are pretty straightforward at first glance. However, the relationship in question doesn’t have to be romantic. Someone you’re close with feels that same deep connection.”

“Noctis, perhaps?” Ignis prompted. I grinned.

“In the days to come, you’ll both be in a vulnerable state. Your bond will be given an opportunity to strengthen. ...But perhaps… It’s more than one person? The Lovers also represent values and beliefs. You’ve recently established yours and it might pay off to bring you closer to the people you care for. Two forces in opposition will need to be brought together and your beliefs and kind heart will aid in that process.”

Melina let out a breath.

“This is one wild reading. I feel like I’ve been preparing my whole life for this moment, ha ha.”

I rested my chin in my hand, thinking. Indeed my belief system had taken a rather radical reform recently. But who was I supposed to be bringing together? Noctis and the gods? Wasn’t that Luna’s job? So what did that mean?

_Try not to look too deeply into it. Take it as it is. She said you probably don’t have all the information you need, anyway._

“This has certainly been insightful,” Ignis spoke. “And relieving, to say the least. How much do we owe you?”

“Nothing,” Melina said, surprising us. “Usually I’d charge ya, but this… I have a feeling this is more important than money. I’m just glad to have helped.”

We insisted on giving her something at least and left with a little less gil and our hearts at a temporary ease.

 

**Day 6 of Mission: Fellowship of the King**

 

The second to last day of peace was spent with Noctis. After the tarot reading the day before, I was pretty excited to spend a day with him. My brother from another world. We had both faced death innumerable times and had somehow come out alive.

We were also kinda bored with nothing to do.

“Altissia’s nice and all,” Noct said, “but this weird break is starting to get to me. I feel like we should be doing something.”

“Are you feeling alright?” I asked. “I thought you’d like the break.”

“Yeah, but we’re in imperial territory with a crazy chancellor after you and a crystal to take back. Not to mention Luna’s all alone…”

“I’m sure she’ll be fine, Noct. You’ll see her in a couple days.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s just so hard to wait any longer.”

“We could always stop by and ask.”

He thought it over.

“Probably not a good idea,” he said. “Imperials, remember?”

“Right.”

We continued making our way through the city, no goal in sight. We talked about everything and nothing all at once. Our worlds were compared, history, culture, art, language. From the most miniscule details of day to day life to the bigger picture of what would happen when we died. It was nice to hear Eos had a pleasant afterlife to look forward to.

A couple hours passed. We rode the gondolas, had lunch at Maagho, and found ourselves near the artsy section of the city. Music swirled everywhere, crafts on display at every turn. Artists showed off their skills. People maneuvered from one exhibit to the next. Were the prices reasonable? Some were, some weren’t. It was to be expected at any sort of market like this.

“Ooh, look!” I said, nudging Noct to get his attention. “Live music! With a piano!”

It was a small jazz quartet. Lots of people had gathered round as they jammed, the melody bringing us all together. I was completely entranced by their skill to converse via music. The saxophone would do his part and be interrupted by the clarinet. Then the pianist would cut in with a soulful riff here and there to keep them in check. I never noticed Noctis sneaking off and coming back.

When the music had ended, the square started to clear. I heard people muttering about preparing for the evacuation for the rite ina couple days. Right. That was coming up soon. Better get all our fun in now.

_And that means swallow your anxiety whole and play a song._

_Whyyyyyy_

_You gotta._

“Wanna play something?” Noct asked, nodding toward the piano. The right corner of my mouth stretched out to form the living version of the :/ emoticon.

“I mean…” I started. “I _want_ to. But I’m also scared of people, y’know?”

“Oh, come on. You’re great at it. They’ll love it.”

“Yeah but… I’ve never sung along in front of people before.”

“You… you’re gonna sing?”

“I remembered a song that fits my whole recent life pretty well.”

“Then go for it. If they don’t like, they’ll have to deal with me.”

“I…”

I looked at the piano. There was no around to say I _couldn’t_ play. So I approached the instrument cautiously. One touch and we were friends.

“Atta girl,” I heard Noct say as I sat on the piano bench. “Do somethin’ to warm up first.”

I quickly tapped out the Mii Channel Theme. A few people stopped to listen. I tuned them out and focused on shoving my anxiety away. My arms and hands were already shaking nervously. I was ready to flee at any moment.

Next song was Home from Undertale, and I happily used that to warm up my vocal chords. The soft, sweet notes swung into the air, my voice with it. It was homely and it was nostalgic. It reminded me of Earth.

“So… Stay determined as you grow, love as you go… Think of the kindness that I’ve shared, and… cherish those who care. Even if we’re worlds apart, stay in my heart. And… if you find you’ve lost your way, I… hope you’ll think of me… Think of me… Think of me…”

Small claps broke my concentration. I smiled sheepishly and decided to just get it over with. The final song began with slowly but quickly jumped to upbeat chords flying to the melody.

 

_“She lives in a fairy tale,_

_somewhere too far for us to find._

_Forgotten the taste and smell_

_of a world that she’s left behind.”_

 

The image of Earth play through my head, alongside it was Eos. My family back home became black and white and all my new friends jumped out all in color.

 

_“It’s all about the exposure, the lens_

_I told her the angle are all wrong_

_Now she’s ripping wings off of butterflies.”_

 

The gift of magic swirled through my veins. My first heal replayed in my brain. My experiences with the gods here on Eos renewed my memory. The training I’d received had been used in bulk.

 

_“Keep your feet on the ground…_

_When your head’s in the clouds…”_

 

I tried not to let my thoughts get the best of me this time. I had a song to focus on and one mess up would throw me off the tracks.

 

_“So go get your shovel_

_And we’ll dig a deep hole_

_To bury the castle, bury the castle_

_Go get your shovel!_

_And we’ll dig deep hole_

_To bury the castle, bury the castle!_

_Ba da ba ba da ba ba!”_

 

Earth reappeared in all its glory. The more it spun, the more it faded. I buried the thoughts back down in my mind. I could worry about home later.

 

_“So one day he found her crying,_

_coiled up on the dirty ground._

_Her prince finally came to save her_

_and the rest you can figure out!”_

 

The encounter with Ravus flashed through my head. Why had I caused my friends to worry like that? It only served to have them trust me with myself less.

 

_“But it was a trick and the clock struck twelve_

_Well, make sure to build your home brick by boring brick_

_Or the wolves gonna blow it down.”_

 

The Dissidia world rushed to the forefront, its illusions and desolateness not quite what I’d call friendly. It had ended quickly, but I already missed the friends I’d made there.

I replayed the chorus, singing along and making sure to pay attention to what I was doing. In the corner of my eye, I spotted a grinning Noctis. It was hard to tell, but I was pretty sure he was tapping his foot along to the music.

 

_“Well, you built up a world of magic!_

_Because your real life is tragic!_

_Yeah, you built up a world of magic!”_

 

Was this all in my head?

No, it couldn’t be.

 

_“If it’s not real, you can’t hold it in your hands,_

_You can’t feel it in your heart…_

_And I won’t believe it, but if it’s true, you can see it with your eyes,_

_Oh, even in the dark…_

_And that’s where I want to be, yeah!”_

 

I knew the feelings I had for my friends. I loved them more than life itself, just as I had loved my friends back home. The small life I had here wasn’t any less legitimate than the one I used to have.

My feelings are valid.

My feelings are _valid._

_My feelings are **valid.**_

 

_“Go get your shovel!_

_And we’ll dig a deep hole!_

_To bury the castle, bury the castle!_

_Go get your shovel!_

_And we’ll dig a deep hole!_

_And we’ll bury the castle, bury the castle!”_

 

When I was finished, I have Noctis the biggest smile. It was instantly returned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more day and then...  
> The rite.
> 
> I don’t have any experience with Tarot so I had to do some research. If I got anything wrong, please me know and I will do my best to change it and make it accurate~
> 
> Golden Flowers song reference:  
> https://youtu.be/EsRZ8rmiEVc
> 
> Home:  
> https://youtu.be/hUUMUsAl97M
> 
> Brick By Boring Brick piano:  
> https://youtu.be/u-KcPPwJLoc


	37. It All Goes To Shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where peace ends and strife begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is. The rite. I hope you guys are ready.
> 
> Seaglass bracelet:  
> https://pin.it/cewaqkykr7qjsa
> 
> Tree of Life pendant:  
> https://pin.it/hn2t4fzgq6hj6u
> 
> Feather:  
> https://pin.it/sfwjdoomxhvalh
> 
> Compass:  
> https://pin.it/sjrcqyxfg23eb5
> 
> Othala Rune necklace:  
> https://pin.it/25rdwwnnyxqier

**Final Day of Mission: Fellowship of the King**

 

The last day in Altissia was spent out on the water. When we returned, night was falling and we made our way back to the Leville. On the way there, I spotted something light green and sparkling at a stand nearby. My curiosity drove me towards it.

It was a bracelet of sea glass stones held together by silver wire. Most of the glass was a pale green but a few were a misty white. I’d never been much of one for jewelry, but sea glass isn’t something I came upon often.

“Whatcha find?” Noctis asked, coming up behind me.

“Sea glass,” I said excitedly, having never seen it in person before. “It’s so pretty!”

“Yours for only two thousand gil,” the clerk said with a smile. I looked to Noctis, my lips starting to curling into a pleading grin. He sighed.

“Sure, why not,” he said. I clapped and handed in the money. “Now, c’mon, we’re going to get dinner.”

In the evening, we had a mini party in the boys’ hotel room. Our last bit of respite was spent together. The guys had cards, food, and enough stories to last us until bedtime.

I joined them for a round of King’s Knight (which I was getting better at) and attempted some Lucian card games. Luckily, I’m a fast learner. It came down to me and Noct.

“I swear if you have the ace of hearts-!” His voice strained.

I struggled to hide my smirk and shrugged. He laid down a three of diamonds and picked a card from the stack. I picked up his three and put down a jack of clubs. The remaining three grinned at his groan.

“It’s almost like watching a game of chess,” Ignis surmised humorously.

“A less boring chess,” Prompto said.

“Chess can actually be quite interesting given the skill level of the two players.”

“How many games did you guys steal from Earth?” I cried, exasperated.

“I want my queen back,” Noctis complained.

“No.”

He put down a four of spades and drew a card from the stack. He sighed. I deposited the three I had collected earlier and drew a card.

_Oooh, hello, there, King of Spades._

I eyed Noct as he continued to fail at getting the cards he wanted. When it was my turn again, I set my hand down. He sighed louder.

“I fucking knew it,” he muttered. I permitted myself to smirk this time. “All the good Spades were gone.”

“What can I say?” I grinned. Noctis narrowed his eyes. “I guess I’ve got skills in _spades.”_

He laughed while Prompto groaned. Ignis chuckled quietly. Gladio was grinning with me. I was so proud of myself.

“Now what?”

“Well, dinner has been eaten,” Ignis said, “and games have been sufficiently played. I believe we should bestow upon our boons of friendship.”

“Your what?”

“We’ve been sneakily getting you stuff,” Prompto told me. “Like when I left to use the bathroom at the garden.”

“Or during your little performance,” Noct added.

“The point is,” Ignis said, “we each wished to give you something to remember us by. I have a feeling we’re reaching a point of no return.”

“You…” I swallowed. “You guys didn’t have to… You didn’t have to do that.”

“I know,” Noctis said. “But we wanted to.”

Gladio’s gift came first.

“In all honesty,” he said, “I didn’t know what to getcha. But I saw this and thought of you.”

He handed me a small object wrapped in tissue paper. I unwrapped it and my eyes widened.

A circular pendant made of copper wire rested in my hands. From the base of the circle, more wire curled up to form the trunk of a tree and fanned out support autumn colored beads as the leaves. My eyes followed the curves and rolls. This had been beautifully crafted, the copper and silvers wires contrasting wonderfully.

“It’s supposed to be the Tree of Life,” Gladio said. I smiled down at it. “Figured you’d like something like that. Don’t let life get you down. You just keep standing strong, got it?”

I nodded happily. “Thank you. It’s so pretty and shiny.”

“What are you, a crow?”

“Yes.”

“Ooh! My turn!” Prompto cut in. He rushed to his side of one of the beds and hurried back. “When I was walking back to those yellow flowers, a bird flew overhead right when I was thinking about what I could get you. This landed right in front of me and I thought, ‘hey, maybe this is the answer!’”

He handed me a falcon feather. White fluff rested at the base of the stem and turned a dull bronze with alternating white until it reached the tip. I ran my fingers over it, enjoying the soft yet firm texture.

“So you know to just let the wind guide you, y’know? Go with the flow and don’t worry so much.”

My smile grew slightly bigger.

“I love it,” I told him. I looked to Gladio. “And yours, too.”

Noctis gestured for Ignis to go next. He found the bag with my map of Eos and extracted something from within it.

“In case you ever lose your way,” he said, presenting to me a travel worn compass, one of which I had been looking at in the shop two days before. “You can always find your way back to us.”

I was starting to get a little teary-eyed. These guys were so sweet and thoughtful. My fingers caressed the edge of the compass, eyes watching the pointer spin and come to a stop at North. The inside was yellow like old paper. The compass rose on it reminded me of how far I’d come.

“Thank you,” I said. “I’ve always wanted a compass of my own.”

“Glad to help,” Iggy said with a small smile. He looked to Noctis.

“Guess it’s… my turn,” he said. “I, uh, saw this in that crafts market we went through. Well, I mean, more like _it_ saw _me.”_

What Noctis gave me was a necklace with what seemed to be a Norse rune as the centerpiece. It hung on a small chain. The rune itself looked like an equal sided diamond with two of the ends jutting out at the bottom.

“The woman running the stand said it’s called Othala. Stands for inheritance and family and heritage. So, uh… Consider yourself an honorary Caelum.”

I slipped it around my neck, fighting back the tightness in my throat.

“I don’t know which of you to hug first,” I said helplessly. Prompto was the first to act. I’d never been part of so many group hugs in such a short span of time. But… it was nice.

_They somehow managed to get me to trust them wholeheartedly within the span of a month._

_Weird, right?_

_I know! And we’re letting them touch us!! How strange is that?_

_So strange._

_But still… They’re sweet. I’ll really miss them when we’re gone._

_Me too, me. Me too._

 

**The Day of the Rite**

 

“Prompto, wait!”

He was already running off to take care of some MTs. We had just finished evacuating the people of Altissia. Leviathan was due to show at any moment. Lady Lunafreya had given a short but motivational speech earlier before heading to the altar. My nerves were higher than ever and my whole body felt light and shaky.

“Ugh…” I shook my head and took off after Prompto. I banished Ithilcalad and readied several bolts of lightning. One by one, the soldiers fell by magic and bullets alone. Prompto stood standing by a big mecha suit that slowly aimed at us. “Don’t run off!”

“Sorry! We got more company!”

I summoned my sword and sighed in annoyance. Noctis had said I could go find Luna when we were done with our jobs. Just how long would I have to wait?!

Prompto began firing at our final enemy. I rushed in and started hacking away at its legs with my sword. Here and there, I’d add in a burst of magic. It didn’t seem to be doing anything.

“Look out! Rockets!”

I managed to dodge just in time. Small explosions went off at the base. They had been trying to get rid of me.

“I’m going to freeze it,” I said, looking at Prom. “Don’t fire until it’s shattered.”

“You sure this’ll work?”

I shrugged. “No idea.”

The power of ice rushed through my veins. My hands froze over with frost. The temperature around us dropped a few degrees. I raised my hands and pulled them back. Then I thrusted them forward.

Nothing happened.

“Uh, ______?”

I growled in frustration.

“Ugh, fine,” I muttered. “I’ll do it the stupid way.”

I rushed the big metal suit. Prompto shot its attacks out of the way for me. When I reached the base, I reached out and shoved my power onto it as soon as I made contact. The suit froze over. I could hear whirring and screeching metal parts from the inside as it malfunctioned. I ran back to Prompto. One hand lifted to the sky.

The ice shattered as lightning struck. Prompto shot bullet after bullet at all the weak spots. Wielding Ithilcalad, I ran in and swung at the suit’s arms. The electrocution had fried some of its circuits. With one well placed blow, one of its arms fell, useless.

“The legs!” Prompto called. “Get the legs!”

I singed them with fire first. Ithilcalad struck the legs as fast as I could swing it. Finally, with Prompto’s help, it came crashing down. I got out of the way quickly.

“Hey, what’s this?”

Prom was looking at an odd attachment to the suit. It seemed to be in working condition. It was black and shaped kind of like Aranea’s lance. Maybe it flew?

I tapped the transceivers we had received from the Altissian government.

“Hey, Ignis,” I said. “We found a thingy. Black, looks like a weapon, maybe a lance or something.”

“Yes, I’ve seen them,” Ignis’ voice came from his end. I heard grunting as he fought off more MTs. “Are you two finished evacuating?”

“Yep.”

“Okay. Prompto, you take that jet to find Noctis. _______, head to the altar. I suspect Lady Lunafreya might need your protection.”

“Right. Prom, you good here?”

“I’m good to go!” he said. “You go find the Oracle.”

“Alright. Be careful, guys.”

“You, as well.” “You, too! Don’t die!”

I ran off down the street. Wherever I saw the empire, I turned down a different alley. I didn’t have the time or skill to deal with them all by myself.

Everything looked the same. During our fight, Leviathan had appeared, but we had been too busy to watch. Now, real walls of swirling torrents surrounded the whole city. Debris was flying everywhere. Large slabs of stone and blocks would slam down onto the ground and into buildings wherever I was. They shook the ground, causing me to slow down.

“I did not sign up for this that night I fell asleep and came to Eos,” I muttered. Soon I found myself in a open area. I was so surprised at the lack of soldiers that I stopped for a moment. “Am I going the right way…?”

I gazed up in the sky. Leviathan was close. I just had to turn right and keep going. The sheer size of her gave me second thoughts, though. She was _massive._ A giant, blue, sea snake with fanning fins and wide mouth large enough to swallow a person whole. She commanded her maelstrom with a stormy vengeance. Why she was so bent on destroying this place, I still had no idea.

_Now is not the time to be bitter. Luna needs us! GO._

I ran down the square and through the alley ways to the coast. There. I saw her. Lunafreya was standing in the altar. Something was flying through the air - was that _Noctis?_

“Shit, it’s happening,” I whispered. “We got this. We _got_ this.”

I made my way to the altar, climbing over the rubble of a fallen building. Once I got over it, I rushed to Oracle. But… something was wrong.

_Where’s Noct? He was just here._

Confused, I slowly walked up the stairs of the altar. It was eerily quiet except for the roaring of the waves. An air of foreboding settled. It prickled at my skin. I didn’t like it one bit.

“...about that Ring…”

_That voice…! No, it couldn’t be!_

I forced my tired body up the remaining stairs. When I reached the top, I saw exactly what I had feared.

Ardyn Izunia was kneeling beside a fallen Lunafreya. The same knife he had threatened me with was in his hand. He didn’t seem to have seen me.

“On second thought, you let him have it,” he snarled. The knife plunged into Luna’s gut. The pained sound she let out broke me from my thoughts. I sprinted over, summoning Ithilcalad. Ardyn looked up right as I reached them. I swung fiercely, determined to stop him from doing anything else. He dodged and sneered. “Of _course_ you’re here. Did I not tell you I would _cut you down?”_

“Leave her alone,” I said lowly. All I had to do was distract him and get him to leave. Luna was shuffling toward something at the end of the altar. Ardyn ignored me and pulled her back.

“Ah, ah, ah. We weren’t quite finished, were we, my dear _Lunafreya?”_

Sparks crackled around us. Electricity was jumping through my body right to my hands. Ardyn looked back at me and smirked.

“Are you going to electrocute me?”

I said nothing. I surged forward, pushing all my energy out at him. I managed to shove him over slightly, but he didn’t fall. One of his hands lashed out and struck me _hard._ I stumbled back, sharp pain throbbing in my cheek.

“Alas, my ride is here. But worry not: I _will_ be coming for you, sooner or later. Oh, and Lady Lunafreya? _Do_ make sure he gets the Ring, would you?”

Ardyn stepped into an airship and it flew away. I immediately fell to Luna’s side.

“Hey, hey, hey,” I said as she gasped for breath. “You’re gonna be okay, okay? You’re gonna be fine.”

My hand began to glow.

“_______, don’t…” she protested. “You’ll hurt yourself. It’s too fatal.”

“Yeah, well, fuck that.”

She was too weak to push me away. As soon as I touched her, the sound healed. Then the forceful stab nearly numbed me as I hunched over. My energy was sapped, making me drowsy. I felt dizzy, like my head was spinning. Now Luna had to prop _me_ up.

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” I slurred. Something tickled my neck. I summoned the darkness before the coughing could begin. That lessened the pain somewhat. “See? All good.”

“Thank you, ______. Truly.”

“How do you know my name?”

“The gods’ messages reach my ears. I can explain later. Right… Right n-now we have to…”

She began coughing just like I had once. I helped her sit upright.

“The trident. It will help Noctis.”

I crawled over to get it and dragged it back to Luna.

“Here,” I said. It was surprisingly light, but I held it up for her anyway. She placed her hands on it. She and it began to glow yellow, my body a light turquoise. Then, Noctis’ body was lifted into the air. Beams of light from all over Eos burst into the sky, granting him their power. His armiger flared out, swirling around him. He jumped into action, sending his godly weapons at Leviathan.

We slowly set the trident down. Luna couldn’t keep herself up any longer. Ravus’ words from forever ago played in my mind.

_“Yet you know **nothing** of the consequences.”_

Was… was communing with the gods _killing_ her? No wonder he was so upset!

_Can I help?_

“No, ______, please don’t,” Luna managed to say. “I cannot be healed. Not from this. It’s too much.”

“No, no, no, I’m not letting you die,” I said sternly. “I’ve come too damn far for that and you have a Noctis to console and reunite with. If you die, I will actually follow you into the afterlife and kick your ass.”

She laughed weakly.

“Very well,” she said. “But I can’t remain like this.”

“That’s okay. You get some rest. I’ll stay here and make sure nothing happens.”

“Thank you, ______. You truly are a kind soul.”

I took off my jacket and folded it to be a makeshift pillow. Then I helped lower Luna down to the ground so she could sleep. Noctis’ armiger flashed through the sky. He cut Leviathan’s fins free from the empire’s clutches. I cringed at the thought of how painful for her that must be.

Finally, Noctis used the trident. He dove into the Tidemother’s side and _ripped_ downward. Instead of blood, seawater erupted and gushed out from the wound. Noctis drew back, exhausted. As Leviathan fell, so did he. He came down to me. And Luna, of course.

“_______, you okay?” Gladio’s voice broke the sudden silence. I was working to fix my jacket so both Luna and Noct could use it as a pillow.

“I’m fine,” I said. “So are Luna and Noct. They’re just unconscious.”

“Okay. Iggy’s on his way. His transceiver’s busted, I think.”

“Alright. Thanks for letting me know. I’m gonna stay here.”

“Right. Prompto and I are heading over, too, but it’ll take longer. Watch out for any imperials.”

“Will do.”

I sighed and sat cross legged. Now I had nothing to do but wait.

_Well, that was fun._

_No kidding. At least Luna and Noct are okay._

_But what now? Where do we go from here?_

_You go **home.**_

 

Two figures appeared over the rubble of the city. I stood and summoned Ithilcalad. Luna and Noct were not going anywhere.

_Wait… That’s…!_

“Ignis!” I called out. He looked up.

“______, there you are!” he shouted back. “Stay there!”

_And who’s with him- **No.**_

Ravus was sprinting over along with Ignis. I raised my sword, determined not to let him scare me. He rushed past Ignis, hurrying to get to Luna. Right as he reached us, I cut him off, sword point in his face.

“Don’t even _think_ about it,” I growled.

“You…” Ravus sneered. “Who _are_ you?”

“______, it’s okay,” Ignis said, coming up behind Ravus. “He’s with me. He’s good.”

I looked from Ravus to Ignis and back again. After a moment went by, I stepped back and let Ravus through. Then Ignis was engulfed in a _very_ relieved hug.

“Thank goodness you’re alright,” he muttered, returning the hug. “I was worried sick.”

“It’ll take more than _that_ to kill me,” I joked. Ravus let out a soft sob. We turned to see him standing, staring heartbrokenly at Luna. Oh, right. Her dress was still stained from the stab wound and he had no idea I could heal people.

“First…” he said with a rough voice, “the Lucians stole from me my mother…”

His hand went to his sword and unsheathed.

“And now… they make a sacrifice of my _sister!”_

“She’s not dead!” I said, rushing forward. “She’s just unconscious. I healed her.”

_“How could she be healed from a wound like **that?”**_

I was shoved aside as Ignis pushed me out of harm’s way. His daggers held Ravus back.

“Ravus, listen to me,” he said. “______ was blessed by the gods to have unbelievable abilities. One of those abilities is _healing._ Check the wound yourself. You won’t find one.”

“Please, Ravus…” I whispered. His eyes flitted to me. “Noct is like my brother. I wouldn’t just let his beloved _die.”_

Ithilcalad had long since disappeared. I stood before him unarmed. Ravus’ gaze went from to Luna. He just _could not_ believe she was alive after that. I raised a glowing hand.

“Here.”

“_______, do _not_ touch him,” Ignis ordered. I ignored him. One touch and I couldn’t hold back the coughs and sudden fatigue. I had used up too much energy. It was draining me dry and using my soul as a food source.

I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t focus enough to bring forth the darkness. I was forced to my knees. Ignis managed to push Ravus back and come to my side.

“What do I do?” he asked. “Tell me, ______, what do I do?”

Ravus said nothing. He only watched. The two were forced to look on as my coughing fit subsided. Small splatters of blood were left on the ground and my hand. Instead of consoling Ignis, I looked up at Ravus.

“Check her,” I wheezed. “She’s just unconscious.”

With an angry huff and sword still withdrawn, Ravus did as I said. A great sigh left him as he checked for a pulse. But his rage had not left. He stood once more, glaring at Noctis with hatred. He raised his sword. Ignis was quick to act. He fought him off.

“What are you doing?” he said with a strained voice. I was too weak to stand and help. Tears formed in my eyes. Why wouldn’t they stop fighting?

“What I should’ve done long ago,” Ravus snarled, “ridding us of this _menace!”_

“Stop,” I croaked. No answer.

Ignis shoved Ravus back, falling himself before doing so again. He looked so weak against Ravus, but he kept trying.

“Stop!”

I couldn’t move. I could only watch as they fought each other.

_The guardians’ conflict._

Once in action, it was clear Ignis was an even match for Ravus. But the latter wielded electricity like I did. His skill with a sword was impressive and I had to watch he struck Ignis again and again.

_No… I have to do something. Anything! I can’t let him hurt them!_

I slumped forward, arms shakily holding me up. Then they slipped. I hauled myself back up on my knees. The sound of metal clashing brought my anxiety rushing back. My heart beat wildly in my chest.

_Just… stand… up…!_

My knees were still working. I stretched one leg back. It seemed fine. Slowly but shakily, I got to my feet. I wobbled, swaying left and right. One foot slid forward. The other joined it. Shuffling was the only way to walk. I gained speed as I got used to the feeling of almost falling over at every step.

“...a mistake,” Ravus roared as I neared. “One that must be corrected!”

I had no idea what he was talking about. Something about Noctis, probably. Neither of them noticed my struggle. Good. That meant I had the upper hand with surprise.

“You of all people must understand how Noct feels,” Ignis argued, “bereft of both parents, and forced to carry on despite losing those you love. You both feel that pain!”

“I feel _nothing!”_ Ravus seethed.

“And ______, bless her soul. She’s from a different _planet,_ Ravus. She’s lost more than all of us combined and yet she still remains strong and caring.”

_“Lies.”_

“It is the truth! She has lost her home, her family, her friends, her culture, and her _history,_ and you stand here wanting to take away the only thing she has left!”

“And what would _that_ be?”

“Noctis! They are as brother and sister, a healer and a ruler destined to sacrifice all for the masses. Surely you understand _that.”_

Ravus brought his sword up in rage. The darkening sky lit up with energy. I recognized the familiar sparkling. Just as he charged his next blow, the electricity zapped through the air. I had absorbed it. His eyes met mine. I couldn’t bring it in myself to waste energy on backing away as he changed targets.

“_______, what are you _doing?!”_

“I won’t fight you, Ravus,” I muttered. He stopped in tracks, not knowing which way to turn. Should he rush to his sister? Should he take the opening and kill Noctis? Should he kill _me?_ “I promised Luna I’d protect her and Noct. Don’t go back on her wishes.”

Ravus stood staring at me. I was a complete anomaly to him. The pain in his eyes hurt _me._ I understood his loss. It pierced my own heart just like Noctis’ had when he had lost his father. Ignis took the opportunity to stab through his metal arm with a dagger, pinning him to the ground.

The battle was done. They had exhausted themselves. Ravus rose to his feet, pushing gently past me. Ignis stood and helped to support me. We watched as Ravus shuffled his own way back to Luna.

“I always knew…” he admitted. He wasn’t talking to us, “...that you would face your fate without fear, fulfill your duty without regret.”

We followed behind him, shifting over the remains of the altar’s arch.

“But… part of me always hoped…”

Ravus fell to his knees.

“...that I might see you happy one day. Your burdens lifted, free to live and love as you please.”

He carefully turned Lunafreya over. She had shifted towards Noctis in her sleep.

_Why is this world so **sad?**_

“You would have made a beautiful bride.”

_Just make it stop._

Ravus lifted her cautiously, cradling her head and holding her. Tears formed in my eyes, threatening to spill over.

“Even in death, the Oracle does not rest. Only once the darkness is dispelled is her calling truly fulfilled.”

_Who made these rules? Why should it be so? How is this fair?! For anyone?!_

“And, as in life, I know she will confront that challenge with a smile on her face.”

“How many times,” I rasped, “do I have to tell you? She’s just unconscious. Stop being so melodramatic and let’s get them to- agh… to safety…”

The coughs began again, not so violent this time. I was too tired to fix myself. I just wanted to sleep.

Unfortunately, that was never an option, ever.

Ignis lowered me down to help Ravus tend to Luna as he checked over Noctis. I sat there, unsure of what I was supposed to be doing. I could hear Ignis moving around behind me. I knew Noctis as okay, but we still had to be careful in case anyone else showed up.

“How did you do it?” a soft voice broke my thoughts. Ravus wasn’t looking at me, but I knew it was he who had spoken. “How did you heal her from such a wound?”

“Oh, um…” I paused. “I don’t know. I just have these weird magic abilities. Healing’s one of them. It takes a lot out of me, though. I feel the pain myself.”

“Your name… She’s asked me to find you once or twice. ...You must’ve healed her despite her protests.”

“I was a bit creative in my coercion but yeah. No way in hell was I letting her die, though.”

“You have my thanks. Perhaps… Perhaps I should apologize for my past hostility.”

“It’s all good.”

Silence fell once again. It had started raining, though I wasn’t when. I hated getting water on my glasses. And Noctis was using my jacket. I huffed in annoyance.

“IGGY!” Someone familiar called out. Ignis and I jolted, recognizing them.

“Gladio!” Ignis called back. He stood to meet him. “Are you alright? Where’s Prompto?”

_Where_ is _Prompto?_

Gladio said nothing. I didn’t like the feeling I was getting from him. Something wasn’t right. I turned myself to see him.

“Well, well,” Gladio said, eyeing Ravus and then me. “What have we here?”

“Gladio, where’s Prompto?” I asked. “Is he okay?”

Instead of answering, Gladio raised his greatsword. Ravus was quick to defend himself - and me, by extension, I guess.

_“You,”_ Ravus seethed. _“Ardyn…”_

I gasped and scooted back to get away. Before Ignis could rush in to help me, Ardyn!Gladio dissipated his sword.

“Oh, dear,” he said. “Was I that transparent?”

The illusion faded and in came dozens of MTs. I was forced to my feet and restrained. I thrashed against them as I watched them shove Ignis to the ground. Ardyn made sure to keep me in his sight.

My breathing picked up. Noctis was just lying there on the ground, defenseless. Ravus was fiercely guarding Lunafreya. Panic started to take hold of me. I couldn’t deal with all of this horrible stuff happening all at once.

“Let him go!” I pleaded. _“Please_ him go! Let them all go!”

Ignis was completely helpless as well. The MTs’ hold would not let up and he had no room to even wiggle. Ardyn ignored me.

“The game’s up, my boy,” he said lightly, knocking Ignis unconscious with his foot.

“Ardyn, _please,”_ I continued. “Please let him go.”

“So you’ll beg for his life but not your own? How utterly cute and _selfless_ of you.”

“My life is worth nothing compared to his. Or Noct’s.”

Ardyn blinked in surprise.

“Ah, so you care about _all_ of them. How curious for an otherworldly girl to become _so attached_ to her new friends in just one month.”

My eyes went wide. How did he _know?_

“Yes, yes, I know _all_ about your little secret. How, you might ask? Oh, I have my ways. And besides, dear _Ignis_ will wake anytime now.”

He crouched down, his knife making another appearance over Noctis.

“No,” I fought harder. I shoved weakly against the soldiers. Their grips held me more tightly. It hurt. “No, no, no, no. Please, Ardyn, don’t hurt him. Please don’t hurt them. I don’t have anything else. _Please.”_

Ignis slowly drifted back into the waking world. I watched Ardyn play with his knife as he waited.

“Ardyn, no, don’t. You can’t. _Please!”_

“Silence her, will you?”

A metal hand clamped around my mouth. I screamed in frustration around it. The more I squirmed, the tighter they held me.

“Come now,” Ardyn said to Ignis, “why not follow your liege’s lead and stop resisting?”

“...Never!” Ignis gasped, struggling in his metal bonds, himself.

“You risked life and limb to safeguard the ‘King of Kings,’ only to witness him fail so _spectacularly.”_

Ardyn situated himself to hover over Noctis’ unmoving body.

“You must be so disappointed.”

_“Unhand him.”_

“I know I am. Oh, what good is a world that only ever lets you down? Why not end it all right here?”

“No… You _can’t…”_

Ardyn lifted Noct’s head, raising his dagger as well. I made all the noise I could, trying anything to get him to _stop._ Ice was creeping out from under my feet, freezing the shoes of the soldiers holding me. Lightning flashed dangerously close to the altar. I was so scared and angry that I didn’t know which feeling to harness power from.

_“NOOOCT!”_

Something flew in just as Ardyn was about to bring his hand down. I wrenched myself sideways, enduring the dull and sharp pains of the soldiers’ hard grips. Ravus was now standing, breathing heavily. He had thrown something at Ardyn.

“My,” Ardyn said, “you three certainly have become fast friends.”

He abandoned his position above Noct. Then he leisurely made his way over to Ravus, comically placing his hat on a soldier’s head. I would’ve found it funny in any other situation.

My eyes widened as Ardyn lifted his hand. It as shrouded in darkness, the same kind we had seen in daemons. With a blast of purple and black, Ravus was blown back. I let out a choked sob. Our only defense was gone. What would happen to Luna? And Noctis? What would happen to _us?_

“Permit me to make a suggestion,” Ardyn said, hand still misting with black. “Rather than follow this flotsam and float away to a watery grave, why not come with me? What do you say?”

He was asking Ignis. Not once did he look at me. I stared at Ignis, pleading with him silently to make the right choice. I wasn’t sure which it was.

“I…” Ignis whispered, trying desperately to think clearly. He looked from Ardyn to Noctis and then to me and again.

_Ignis, please do something! I can’t move!_

With loud groans of effort, Ignis forced the MTs off of him. He got to his feet, standing determinedly. His glasses had fallen off. I sighed in relief. He had made a decision. I trusted him.

“I’ll take that,” Ardyn said, “as a ‘no.’”

“I… swore… an oath,” Ignis declared. He had something in his hand, “to stand with Noct and keep him safe. Whatever it takes, I _will_ protect him!”

_Lunafreya had the Ring._

_**No.** _

I thrashed my hardest against the soldiers. My noises of protest and worried screeches fell on deaf ears.

“Ah, ah, ahhh,” Ardyn chided. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

Ignis had put on the Ring. He groaned and clutched at his head as its power burned through him. Ardyn only laughed.

“I… may not be of royal blood,” Ignis said nobly, “but if a _Glaive_ can harness its power, then _so can I!_ Kings of Lucis! _Lend me your strength!”_

Ignis’ cries and shouts of pain sent me into a frenzy. Magic welled up inside me, aching to be let out. The elements burst out around me, but still, I could do nothing. I wasn’t strong enough to break free like Ignis had.

With one loud cry, Ignis went silent. Only the sound of the rain filled the silence. A strange, magenta fire covered his left hand, the one with the Ring. It also covered his eyes.

_Did… Did he do it?_

With one glance at Ardyn, Ignis warped away. I stretched my neck to see him. He had gone to the next platform. I looked back to Ardyn. Rage was suppressed behind those whimsical eyes.

“Well,” he said. He disappeared… And reappeared right in front of Ignis.

_Did… Did Ardyn just **warp?**_

_**What?** _

The MTs held me still as a fight ensued. Ignis fought with all the power the Ring had granted him. They were much like mine. I saw fire, ice, and lightning flare out around him as he struck Ardyn as hard and as fast as he possibly could. My nerves were on fire, my heart racing at what was probably an unhealthy rate. _Ardyn was hardly even fighting back._

_How? How is he so powerful? Is he really a daemon? Can a daemon be a person?_

_**How did he warp?!** _

Magic was still building inside me. I gazed down at the unconscious Noctis and Luna below me. Fury welled up in me. The Ring was a gift from the gods and yet it still did nothing to help. The gods had done absolutely nothing to help us this whole time. They had only held us back. And Ardyn? Well, he was just the _icing_ on the cake.

_“The gods care not for you or your friends.”_

_“There’s no changing fate, _______, you of all people should know that.”_

_“It is most perverted that you should require the gods’ **approval** to make history.”_

_“Should you stand in the way if destiny, I **will** cut you down.”_

_They did this. They did this to all of us. If you trace it all back, it just comes to the gods and their sick way of torturing my friends._

Right as Ignis’ Royal Ring Free Trial ended, an explosion of white fire erupted into the night. The MTs restraining were blown back. I felt a rush of renewed energy run through me. It gave me the strength to bolt.

A shriek pierced the air. My hands had reached their destination. Ardyn didn’t even have time to dodge.

_“Stop. Hurting. My. Friends.”_

I channeled all the white magic in my body through my hands into my fingers and into Ardyn’s face. I had never thought someone screaming in pain would be something I enjoyed, but right then, oh, was it satisfying. _Finally._ A way to take out all my anger and rage. Ardyn had been the last straw. I was _done _standing in the background doing nothing.__

Black sludge began to pour from Ardyn’s features. It came from his eyes in the form of tears, from his mouth like saliva. His golden eyes inverted to black with yellow sclera. He really was a daemon. With one more shout, he managed to shove me off of him.

Groaning, he stumbled back, staring at me in almost frightened bewilderment. _Almost_ frightened.

“Well,” he said, snarling at me. “That was… exhilarating, to say the least.”

He retreated with what remained of his soldiers. I stumbled back to where Noctis was. Now I was completely exhausted. I collapsed next to Ignis, who was lying on the ground. Ravus came calmly walking over to us and knelt beside Ignis.

“That was rather reckless,” he berated. He looked to me. “Remind me not to ever cross you again.”

I wish I had the strength to grin or even nod.

“Where’s Noct?” Ignis gasped. “Is he… Is he… alright?”

“Ignis, he’s right there,” I whispered, unable to lift my voice higher. “He’s okay. You’re okay. We’re all okay.”

“Thank goodne-”

Coughing interrupted him. And it wasn’t me. The effects of the Ring had taken a huge toll on him, like my own powers had taken a toll on me.

“Iggy?!” Gladio’s voice shouted from the street. “Where are you?”

“Iggy!” Prompto called out with him. “______! Noct!”

“Over here!” I said, voice hoarse and hardly audible. Ignis tried to answer, as well.

“Be still,” Ravus told us. I looked at him helplessly. “Conserve your strength. You’ve a calling to fulfill.”

“Fuck my _calling,”_ I spat. “I just want my friends to be _safe.”_

“And I wanted the same for my sister. Look where that left me.”

He stood. Gladio and Prompto continued to call out for us.

“Wait,” I said. “Come with us. You can take…”

I coughed.

“...take care of Luna…”

He paused, and turned to look at his sister. A sigh was all I heard.

“Only for a little while,” he said.


	38. Copula sortis et conploratio patriae

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is time for Reader to discover her fate and her ties to Eos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “The bond of fate and the mourning of (the) home(land)”
> 
> I toyed around with lots of ideas of what could happen to Earth. It seemed only fitting that the Astrals (read: Bahamut) do something about to ensure Reader can’t return home. If it seems a little too dramatic, I’m sorry, but I’m sticking with it.  
> You have been warned.

“Okay. I can do this. I can do this.”

I let the white magic take over, my hands glowing cyan. Ignis say before me in Noctis’ without his glasses. It was the day after the rite and refused to leave his side. Both Luna and Noctis had yet to wake. Ignis had lost his sight to the Ring. Everytime I looked at the scars around his eyes, my heart hurt.

“_______, you don’t have to,” Ignis said softly. I shook my head even though he couldn’t see.

“No, I do,” I said. “I have to at least _try.”_

I placed my hands on his head, cupping his face. I let the magic feel around for the damage. Nothing happened. I tried channeling the magic to his eyes. Still nothing.

“______?” he muttered. I let out a sharp breath.

“It’s… it’s not working…” I panicked. “Why isn’t it working?”

I pressed my hands against his head, forcing the magic out. No amount of concentration or effort would work. Tears came to my eyes.

“It won’t work.”

Ignis took my hands from him. I took them back and threw my arms around him. He slowly returned the hug.

Time passed by. Neither of us said anything.

“What were you thinking?” I finally whispered. “I can’t heal this.”

“I knew the consequences,” Ignis told me. “It was all we had. You would’ve done the same.”

I hated that he was right. The tears spilled. I let myself cry now. I had tried so hard throughout our journey not to the let them see how broken everything was slowly making me. But now… There was no fixing this. I couldn’t take it.

“Shh… Everything’s alright now. Noctis and Lunafreya are safe. _You_ are safe. I told you I wouldn’t let Ardyn hurt you.”

“You could’ve _died.”_

“And I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”

Ignis had made me swear not to tell the others what had really happened. Even Ravus was in on the secret, though he had argued along with me that they all deserved to know. Ignis didn’t want them worrying too much. Instead, the focus was on my ability to hurt Ardyn, to _really_ hurt Ardyn.

Everything that had happened yesterday was still overwhelming. I needed time to _think._

“How are you feeling?” Ravus’ voice came from the door. He peered in as I extracted myself from Ignis, wiping my eyes.

“It can’t be healed,” Ignis spoke for me. “As we suspected.”

“Then there’s no reason to keep trying.”

That sentence was aimed at me. I sulked and went to on the bed next to Noct, back to them. He slept soundly and peacefully.

“How is she?” Ignis asked.

“Still asleep, like him. It’s only a matter of hours before they wake, I presume.”

“I hope Gladio isn’t giving you too much trouble.”

“Just about as much as everyone else.”

“Besides ______ and I, of course. I’m sure they’ll come round.”

Ravus had been surprisingly compliant to the First Secretary’s terms to allow him to stay with his sister. His helping out against the empire he once worked for was nice, but it didn’t guarantee him anyone’s complete trust.

“Yes, well,” Ravus said, looking away. “Let me know when he wakes. They’ll most likely want to see each other.”

When he had left, I went to join Ignis at the small set of chairs around a small coffee table. I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. The longer I sat there, the guiltier I felt. So, being the stubborn person I am, I stood and tried placing my hands on Ignis’ head.

“______…” he said. He slowly pulled my hands down. “Don’t.”

I tried again. “But I-”

“Please.”

“...Okay…”

The soft, hopelessness in his voice had me acquiescing to his request. I flopped back onto a chair.

“But… what good are these powers if I can’t even help my friends?”

“You _healed Lunafreya. That_ is what is most important.”

“But _you_ can’t _see.”_

“And I am plenty aware! ...But I’ll live. It will take time, but… It will have been worth it.”

It didn’t really sound like he believed that last sentence. I didn’t know what to say. What _could_ I say? That I was sorry I wasn’t strong enough to push off the holds of several soldiers? That I couldn’t help because of circumstances I had no control over?

_This is bullshit. Ignis shouldn’t have to suffer like this. **No one** should have to suffer like this._

If this is what the gods wanted, then I would have no part in it. Except… What if they still needed me? What would they even need me for?

_**Why am I here?** _

Rustling broke our solemn silence. I lifted my head to see Noctis coming to. He hesitantly sat up, blinking sleepily.

“Morning, sleepy head,” I said, doing my best to smile.

“Hey,” came Noctis’ croaky voice. “What happened…?”

“You won,” Ignis said without any emotion. “Lady Lunafreya is still asleep, as far as I am aware. But she lives. You have _______ to thank for that.”

“Uh, yeah, I saw. You okay?”

“I will be. I’m very glad you’re awake, and that you're alright. I’ll find Ravus and tell him the news.”

“Do you need-?” I tried to ask him as he felt for the arm of the chair to get up.

“No, thank you. I’m sure Noct has questions for you.”

Noct and I watched quietly as he slowly made his way out of the room. Noctis awakening must’ve been too much for him.

“What’s with him?” Noctis asked, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. I paused before answering.

“...He was blinded,” I said softly.

“What? _How?”_

“I don’t know. He won’t tell any of us.”

“But- how can he just-? What…”

Lying to Noctis left the weight of guilt on my chest, but I’d honor Ignis’ wish of not telling anyone what had really happened. Instead, I stood and walked to the bedside.

“How are you feeling?” I asked. He snapped out of his shocked trance.

“Uh, fine, I guess. Where’s Luna?”

I let Noctis get up and dressed. Then I led him to Lunafreya’s room. I peered inside. Luna had awoken as well. Ravus was standing to her side, facing the door. Ignis wasn’t anywhere to be found. I knocked gently,

“His Majesty wishes to see his bride,” I said jokingly. Noctis sputtered behind me. Luna gave me a weak laugh and nodded for us to come in. I let Noct go in first.

“Luna!” He rushed over to her. Ravus circled around the bed to stand next to me. It was hard to tell, but I was certain he had a small smile on his face at seeing his sister so happy.

“Should we give them a moment?” I asked. He sighed and nodded. We left the room. I was just glad _something_ good was happening now.

It wouldn’t last.

I found Ignis sitting with Gladio and Prompto. They were all silent until I appeared.

“So, no dice with the healing?” Gladio asked me. I shook my head.

“I gave it all I had,” I told him. Gladio’s eyes shifted from me to over my shoulder at Ravus and narrowed. “Come on, Gladio, be nice. He’s here for Luna, and he helped Ignis.”

“Forgive me for still having my doubts.”

I sighed, shoulders dropping. My own eyes looked to Ignis.

“How’re you feeling?” I asked. “Er, that’s to you, Iggy…”

“As best I can,” he muttered. “______, please don’t worry about me. I know you want to, and I appreciate it, but if there’s nothing to be done, then I don’t want you to waste your energy on it.”

I let out a small whine. “Bold of you to assume I can just stop worrying like _that.”_

I went to sit next to Prompto, who inquired about Noctis. I gave him what little report I could. Several moments passed. No one really said anything. Ravus leaned against a wall. Perhaps thirty minutes went by, maybe an hour. All I know is that at some point, one of the caretakers of the place we were staying at came to fetch me. She said Luna wanted to speak with me. I followed her to the room.

“Uh, hey,” I said awkwardly. I slipped into the room, closing the door behind me. “You, ah, wanted to see me?”

“Yes, please,” Luna said. Noctis was sitting at a chair at her side. Another one was right next to it. “Please have a seat. It’s wonderful to meet you officially.”

“Uh, you, too. You, ah, probably know what I need to ask…? But I can wait until you’re feeling better.”

She shook her head, fair, blonde hair flowing around her. She really was beautiful. Noctis must feel like the luckiest man on Eos.

“You’ve waited long enough,” she told me. “I can only imagine how difficult being on another world must be.”

I shrugged and said, “Noctis and his friends have made it relatively easy.”

“I’m very glad they were there to help. But… I’m sure you’ve all been wondering _why_ it is you’re here.”

“Yeah,” Noct said. “Cid told us about a legend from a thousand years ago about the same thing happening.”

Luna nodded. “Yes, it’s good you’re familiar with the tale. He was from the same world as _______, I believe. It’s a popular tale in Tenebrae. His purpose was to provide a link between worlds, as Earth and Eos are related in terms of their origins. The gods began there first, but left it on its own over time.”

“Wait,” I interrupted, “so you telling me _Astrals_ are actually _God himself?”_

“That would be one way to interpret it, yes.”

“So God really did abandon us. Huh. Well, that’s… gonna be a cause for a religious existential crisis later.”

Luna laughed. “Don’t think on it too much. What I really need to tell you is your link to each other.”

Noctis and I exchanged a glance.

“You mean the weird pull that I get sometimes?” Noctis asked.

“You feel it, too?” I asked.

“Yeah, how could I not? It’s so weird. Can’t say I like the sensation.”

“Before the universe began,” Luna explained, “everything existed all at once and in a very compact space. Then, it all expanded outward in a great burst of light. Everything is made from that light, the gods, the worlds, and even yourselves.

“Soon the light began to separate, creating the universe as we know it. However, some things once together now long for their twin. Atoms that once existed in tandem and in harmony were forced apart. You two… are one example of this.”

“Are…” I licked my lips. “Are you telling me…”

“...that we’re, like, soulmates, or something?” Noctis finished. Luna nodded.

_No wonder we’re so alike._

“So we’re… soul siblings?” I reasoned. “‘Cause being anything else would be…”

“Not… right,” Noctis said awkwardly. Strange how we were so in sync. “Man, that makes so much sense. It’s… kinda weird, though. I almost don’t want to believe it. I mean, soulmates are just something you hear about in stories.”

“Yeah… But… It _does_ make sense. We’re both autistic and picky and kinda reckless…”

“And now we’re finishing the other’s sentences.”

_“Weird,”_ we spoke at the same time. Luna was giggling at our exchange.

“Yes, very,” she said with a wide smile. “Noctis has needed your companionship and now, he has it.”

“I’ll say,” Noct said. “I couldn’t have braved Costlemark alone.”

“Costlemark? Costlemark _Tower?”_

We spent the next hour or so telling Luna about all our crazy adventures, including the Dissidia world. She was both impressed by our resilience and exasperated by our sibling squabbles.

“You were pretty infatuated.”

“I was not!”

“Uh, yeah, you were and you _still_ are.”

“I am _not!”_

“You broke when he kissed your hand! And we had only known him for, what, _maybe_ twenty minutes?”

“You dove headfirst into a fight with _Sephiroth.”_

“For good reason! Lightning lost her sword!”

“And then everyone, _including you,_ went for the planesgorger without much of a plan.”

“What would you have suggested?”

“I don’t know, but there were at least thirty other people there. We could have come up with _something.”_

“Alright, you two,” Luna cut in, laughing. “I think that’s enough.”

“At least he protected you,” Noctis said to me, scratching his neck. “Maybe he… likes you, too?”

“I don’t know,” I said. “I’m more annoying than anything. He probably just thinks I’m a hindrance.”

“I don’t think anyone could find you a hindrance,” Luna said. I couldn’t help but smile.

It wouldn’t last.

When we left to find the others, we discovered Luna still wasn’t doing too well. The rite had taken a larger toll on her than any of us had would have thought. She couldn’t walk very well and Noctis had to help her to the door. I asked if she’d rather stay on bed, but she said no. Ravus would probably scold us later.

Everyone stood upon her appearance in the sitting room, even Ignis. No one had told her of his blindness and she gasped when she saw the scars around his eyes. Ravus came forward to take her from Noctis.

“What happened?” she asked.

“He won’t tell us,” Gladio said, crossing his arms. “Something with the Niffs, probably.”

He glared at Ravus. I nudged Luna and mouthed “ring.” She nodded solemnly.

“Perhaps I could do something,” she said.

“There’s no need,” Ignis tried to protest. “Not even ______ could.”

“But _______ is not the Oracle.”

Ignis caught her hint that I might’ve let something slip and sighed.

“If I have no other choice…” he trailed. Luna smiled approvingly.

“Then please, sit down,” she said. Ignis did as told. I hurried to stand beside him as Noct and Ravus helped Luna to stand before him. They relinquished her arms and she placed her hands on his face. We watched as she leaned down to rest her forehead against the top of his. “Blessed stars of life and light…”

A soft glow emitted from her hands. I looked on with awe as it traveled from her fingers to his eyes. Just as soon as it had come, it disappeared. Luna pulled back and Ignis slipped his glasses off. The misty gray faded to green. He blinked several times and rubbed his eyes. Finally, he gazed up at Luna.

“I…” he breathed. I swear I saw tears start to form. “I am in your debt.”

“No,” Luna said, shaking her head. “I am in yours.”

“I think you’re even, now,” I said, laughing slightly.

“I thought…” Ignis swallowed and sent me a grateful glance. “I was sure it was permanent.”

“With the Oracle, anything’s possible!” Prompto said. We all laughed.

But it wouldn’t last.

Several days passed and those days turned into weeks. Accordo was in disarray. There wasn’t much we could help with, unfortunately. The city had been almost completely decimated. Leviathan’s wrath had touched most of the small nation and now they had to find a way to rebuild. Most of the citizens had survived, though, and the First Secretary had us to thank for that. She allowed us to stay for as long as we needed provided we help with anything that needed helping.

I spent those weeks getting to know Luna, and Ravus, by extension, and reveling in how cute and flustered Noctis got when he was with her. Oh, I loved teasing him.

Gladio and Prompto got used to Ravus being around. Ignis pulled me aside the at first day to thank me for telling Luna, even if it had been just one word to let her know. He still refused to tell anyone the details on what had happened other than that Ardyn was involved. Ravus and I often gave him disapproving looks whenever it came up, but said nothing otherwise.

I also spent that time telling my friends more about Earth, now that things were looking up concerning my going home.

“No way thirteen _colonies_ beat an empire,” Gladio scoffed.

“Yeah way,” I retorted. “We had help _and_ knew the land better!”

“And I bet their military was a hell of a lot better than yours.”

“Sure, but we had determination and George Washington.”

“And what?”

“The guy who became the first president.”

“Right. I’m still not buying it.”

I rolled my eyes. “That’s not my fault.”

“I think it’s way cool,” Prompto said. “Gives me hope about our chances against Niflheim.”

“Yes, but we have no way of declaring independence,” Ignis put in. “Seeing as Lucis and the Crown City aren’t exactly in fine condition. There wouldn’t be any point. Most of the Glaives perished with Insomnia’s fall.”

“Just remember empires fall, too,” I said. “Great Britain is now just a little island and a half in the north part of Europe.”

“I guess every country’s got that ‘take over the world’ phase,” Noctis added. I nodded with an amused grin.

Later on, we really did address our new bond.

“So…” I said, not sure where to start. Noctis and I were sitting on the edge of the bed in his room. After skirting around the issue and getting used to the idea for a few days, we finally decided to talk about our soul bond. “I’ve got a soul twin from another planet.”

“That’s putting it lightly,” Noctis laughed. The laughter died down soon. A moment passed. “But… I guess it makes sense. Why you were brought here at this point in time. It’s… nice, having you here and… Well, I…”

He started scratching at his head.

“Your… support… and… friendship has been… Ah, well, it’s something I didn’t know I needed. I mean, I’ve got the guys, but I’ve never… had an actual sibling before, you know?”

“Neither have I,” I said, nodding. “It’s… _really_ good to know there’s been someone out there all this time who’s had my back. My life on Earth wasn’t- _isn’t_ all that bad compared to a lot of other people, but… it wasn’t- ugh, _isn’t_ perfect. It just makes the worst moments seem almost bittersweet now that I know I wasn’t alone.”

“Yeah, I get that.”

Neither of us spoke for another minute or two. I listened to the gentle hum of the air conditioning and just enjoyed the presence of my friend-turned-brother. Soulmates… We weren’t two halves of a whole. We were more like two parts of a pair. We could function without the other just fine, but together we were better.

“It almost doesn’t feel any different,” Noct said quietly. “It just feels like I’ve known you my whole life and that’s that.”

I smiled. “Me, too. Let’s not let it rule our lives, right?”

“Oh, yeah. Definitely not. Soulmate or not, if you make fun of my fishing again, I _will_ kick your ass.”

“Fight me, nerd.”

_“You’re_ the nerd.”

Not every moment was as lighthearted, however. Luna’s condition was getting worse and worse. It started with coughing, much the same as mine. Then she couldn’t leave her bed. As days passed, whenever I came to visit, she didn’t seem as optimistic as before. In fact, it was to me in particular she looked at with sorrow. Why, I wasn’t sure, but I never questioned it. If she had something to tell me, then she’d tell me.

And then I began to notice Ignis acting in the same strange way on occasion. It was only to me and Noctis, and it was usually after the times Noct pushed about his blinding. He didn’t say anything, but the pained glances he sent our way had me concerned. It was almost as if he knew something we didn’t.

“Hey, Ignis?” I asked after dinner one night. We were alone in the kitchen, cleaning up. “Can, uh, can I… ask you something?”

“Of course,” he said, pushing his glasses. He continued rinsing off a plate. “What’s on your mind?”

I took a moment to think of how I wanted to phrase my question.

“Are you… _sure_ everything’s okay now?” I asked quietly. I checked the doorway to make sure no one was listening. “I mean, I’ve been having dreams about what happened with Ardyn, too, but… they seem to be affecting you more.”

Ignis paused in his washing. His eyes flitted to me and then back.

“Everything is alright,” he said stiffly. I sighed.

“Okay…” I relented. “I won’t push but… you can talk to me about anything if you need to, okay?”

He nodded shortly. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

The next day, when I came by to see Luna, she was saying goodbye to Ravus, who had to leave to answer to the empire for his betrayal. I waited patiently outside the door, but it was cracked open just barely. I didn’t mean to hear the conversation going on inside.

She was crying.

“...can’t tell her, Ravus,” her faint voice drifted out from the crack in the doorway. “I _can’t.”_

“You must,” Ravus told her. “I won’t be here to do it for you. You’ve delivered the Ring to Noctis, you can deliver this news to _______.”

_They’re talking about me? What isn’t she telling me?_

“It will _break_ her, Ravus,” Luna sobbed. “I can’t bear to see her pain. Not after all she’s been through. Not after what she’s done for Noctis.”

“You have the strength,” Ravus insisted. “And if you don’t have it afterward, her friends will support her. Of that much, I am sure.”

“But can they save her from herself? And if she acts rashly, will she let them stand in her way?”

_What??? Why would they stand **against** me?_

“What if she hurts them in her pain? What they hurt _her?”_

“Noctis would not allow it. I saw them in Aracheole. She defended his life in a heartbeat. He would do the same for her, especially if what you told me is true.”

Silence. Then Luna whispered something I couldn’t make out. I decided then to find Noctis and see her later. I shouldn’t be eavesdropping. She would tell me sooner or later. She _had_ to.

Ravus was gone the next day and without him, Luna was even worse than she had been previously. She would only eat with Noctis and hardly spoke when I came to check on her. Whenever I asked if something was wrong, she would shake her head with a forced smile and tell me no.

 

“Soul mates, huh?” Gladio said. “Figures.”

“Weird, right?” Noctis said. “But… Nothing seems any different.”

“We’re just closer than before,” I added. Noct agreed. Ignis didn’t meet either of our gazes.

“It’s all coming together,” Prompto said almost dreamily. “First your powers, then the gods’ blessings, and now this? We should seen it sooner!”

“Explains a lot,” Noctis said. “But we’ve agreed to not let it dictate every interaction.”

“It’s more like a background detail,” I said. “And a good excuse for why I’m here.”

“What do you think, Iggy?” Prom prompted. “You’ve been awfully quiet.”

Ignis managed to lift his head.

“I’ll admit, it was one of my wilder theories,” he said coolly. “I never truly thought it possible, though.”

“Yeah, I know! It’s like a fairy tale or something.”

“A fantasy,” I suggested.

“Yeah, but a _modern_ fantasy! You don’t see that everyday.”

“The last fantasy,” Gladio joked. “The last original one of our generation.”

“A _final_ fantasy,” Ignis quipped. I laughed.

_Final fantasy… Why does that sound so familiar?_

“So…” Prompto said. “Anyone up for a game of Ace’s Plight?”

“Me!” I said instantly, raising my hand quickly. I had come to love that card game dearly.

“Oh, no,” Noctis said warily. “I’m not losing to you again.”

“Come ooonn. It’s only the fifth time.”

_“Fourth_ time. That one in the Leville didn’t count.”

“Uh, yeah, it did. I won by technicality.”

“You did not. That drink spilled right as I got a full hand.”

“And I already had one. I win by the those few seconds.”

“Not fair.”

“All’s fair in love and war and card games, Noctis.”

The next day I finally mustered the courage to announce my inquiring about going home. If I could, _then_ I’d fret over whether or not I really wanted to. For now, we had respite. I wouldn’t let its tranquility go to waste.

“We’ll wait outside for you,” Noctis said. They followed me to gather around the door to Luna’s room. “Take as much time as you need, okay?”

I nodded and took a deep breath. The air was still with apprehension. Everyone was quiet. Luna awaited me inside.

_Moment of truth._

I was not ready.

When I closed the door after entering, I took a look at Luna. She was exhausted, slumped against the pillows propping her up. Her skin had gone sickly pale, eyes only able to fully open for Noctis. I gulped and approached the bed. When she recognized me, she closed her eyes.

“______,” she breathed. “Good to… to see you.”

“You too,” I said. My heart fluttered anxiously. “Um, so… There’s something I’ve been needing to talk to you about.”

A great sigh left her. She slowly opened her eyes. A sense of resignment ebbed from her and I came fo stand by her bed, not sure whether to sit down or not.

“I know,” she rasped. Her eyes narrowed as she struggled to keep tears back. “I _know,_ and yet…”

She let out a choked breath.

“I wish I was not the one to tell you.”

My heart fluttered nervously. That didn’t sound good.

“Tell me what?” I asked softly. “About home?”

“Yes,” Luna answered. “About Earth and its fate.”

“I’d say you don’t have to, but… that’s… kind of why I traveled here with Noctis in the first place.”

She said nothing for a few minutes. I waited patiently, fiddling with my jacket and the bed comforter. The hum of the air conditioning switched on.

“Why must it always be like this?” Luna finally spoke. I brought my gaze back to her. “Why must such sorrowful things come to pass to those who deserve it the least?”

_Oh no._

“So I…” I licked my lips. “I can’t go home…?”

“No,” she whispered. “It isn’t possible.”

My heart dropped in my chest. I knew it. I had known all along. As soon as I heard my predecessor hadn’t gone home, I knew I wouldn’t, either. That’s fine. I could deal with it as it came. I’d just… mourn in time, like everyone did.

“But I must tell you why.”

I shook my head. “You really don’t have to. I… guessed I wouldn’t be able to. Go home, that is.”

“Please, ______… I must or… Or I won’t be able to live with myself. You deserve to know what happened.”

I hesitated before speaking.

“...Okay…” I relented in a whisper. I let her speak.

“I know it will be hard to take,” Luna said thickly. The tears had spilled. That did nothing to quell my fears. “But I… ...Just know this: it is _not_ your fault, and it could not be helped.”

_What is that supposed to mean? Did it get destroyed or something?_

I meant it as a joke.

“It was a meteor- an asteroid. It…”

A heartbreaking gasp left her as she tried to stop crying.

_**No.** _

“There was nothing they could do,” she sobbed.

_**No.** _

“It hit the surface and then… They had no Archaean to break its fall.”

_**No.** _

_“I’m sorry, ______.”_

I shook my head.

“That’s not possible,” I denied with an empty smile. “They would have seen it. We have things that could have stopped it.”

She shook her head and brought a hand to her face to wipe the tears away.

“It is the truth,” she whispered. “Please believe me, _______. _Please.”_

Silence.

A pin could drop and you could hear it.

My breathing, once inaudible, became deeper and louder. I stared at Luna with that same broken smile. I blinked once. I blinked twice. No thoughts ran through my head.

All was silent.

Then, I turned to the door and turned my head.

“Thank you for telling me,” I said, void of emotion.

When the door opened, everyone looked up. A moment passed. I said nothing. Prompto spoke first.

“How’d it go?” he asked anxiously. I blinked at him. Then I looked to Gladio, who raised a brow. Then to Ignis, who looked solemn. And finally, I glanced at Noctis, who now was worried.

“You okay?” he asked. I said nothing.

…

…

…

I turned on my heel and walked all the way down the hall to my room. I could hear Luna crying the whole way and feel the others’ gazes on me as I went.

I felt nothing.

The door closed quietly.

 

In the center of my room sat a dog. Its white fur was fluffy and it panted with its pink tongue out. I was in no mood to coo over it. I gave it one glance and turned to my bed. The dog whined and stood.

_Please come here,_ it begged. I glared at it. _Please. I have something important to show you._

_Is this one of Luna’s dogs?_

Sighing in annoyance, I walked forward.

“What?” I said flatly.

My vision flashed white and a scene of black and white showed my struggle at the altar and Ignis putting on the Ring. Then my outburst of magic and the near-wounding of Ardyn played and my sight returned to normal.

_So it is._

I knelt down before it. This must be Pryna. I had wondered where she had been this whole time.

“Show me,” I said, throat tightening. “Show me what happened.”

The visions returned.

A planet of green, white, and blue floated in the deep expanse of space. The marble planet, my home. Earth. It was so beautiful from a distance, a haven for life. My home. My life. My love.

My heart jolted with homesickness.

A flash of light blue lit the left side of the vision. A large, cratered asteroid appeared from the banks of my sight. It creeped steadily across its half of the picture.

My breathing stopped as it crashed into my home. Dust burst from the collision, clouding around the whole planet. Rocks and chunks of earth spouted from the point of impact. The dust did not settle. Slowly, orange and red seeped up around the asteroid. It was large enough to break the crust.

It was a scientific anomaly.

It was the Second Coming without Jesus.

It was the end of a history.

It was the end of everything I had once known.

It _hurt_ to watch.

And then the vision changed. Gone was the color. Gone was the vibrancy of Earth.

A hand now rested in the center of my sight, black and white. An older Noctis appeared with his father’s sword in hand.

A demonic voice began to speak.

“A power greater than even that of the Six, purifying all by the light-”

An image of me, by Noctis’ side. Older me watched on with a heavy heart and tearfilled eyes.

“-and the glaives of rulers past.”

One by one, his ancestors struck him. Each blow was more devastating than the last.

“Only at the throne can the Chosen receive it, and only at the cost of two lives: his own-”

Older me stood crying next to her brother. The last of the kings was a older man, solemn and full of sorrow. She faced him with pleading eyes that caused him to hesitate.

“-and his twin’s.”

His sword struck her down. She fell to Noctis’ side. His hand slid down his weapon.

The image changed to Noctis summoning his forebears in an empty realm. His sister stood at his side. She granted him her power.

_I’m the light?_

“The King of Kings shall be granted the power to banish the darkness, but the blood price must be paid.”

The King and Healer sent the best of their strength surging towards - Ardyn. He was the darkness. The same black residue was on his face as when I had struck him.

“To cast out the Usurper and usher in dawn’s light will cost the life of the Chosen.”

Then the faces of my friends each appeared. Noctis, Prompto, Gladiolus, Ignis, and me.

“Many sacrificed all for the King, so must the King sacrifice himself for all. Now enter into Reflection, that the Light of Providence shine within.”

The waking world flashed back into view. Pryna sat before me, ears drooping.

Silence.

_“Are you telling me…”_

_“...that we’re, like, soulmates, or something?”_

With a piercing, _heart_ wrenching sob, I flung my arms around the dog, and cried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter does start where you think it will.


	39. Back Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re in Dissidia again!!! This time, it’s Dissidia Opera Omnia. Technically, that game is supposed to be an alternate timeline, but in my story, it’s a continuation of the last time they were there.  
> Enjoy!

“Ugh… Stupid sunlight…”

An aching pain throbbed in my skull. I slowly sat up. I was not where I was supposed to be.

“What the… fuck, where am I?”

I got to my feet and looked around. Ruins lied all around me. It looked like an ancient castle was slowly withering away with mold and moss growing on its sides. Or at least, that was one of it. The other side was where I was actually standing. These ruins were much more… crumbly. The buildings had no roofs but I could make out the distinct rooms.

_Am I… in some Solheim ruins?_

“Noctis?” I called out. “Gladio? This isn’t funny. You guys _know_ I can't defend myself very well.”

No answer. I sighed. Fine. If they wanted to play a prank, then so be it. I’d play along. For now.

_What was I doing? And where was I? Agh, my memories are all… jumbled._

Had we reached Altissia yet? Had we even gotten a boat yet? Where had we left Iris? Everything seemed fuzzy. I knew it was there but I just couldn’t recall it. It was like taking a test and _knowing_ that we had covered certain material in class but I just couldn’t _remember._

“Ugh… better find my way out.”

I stuck my hands in my pockets and gazed around the grassy patch I was in. Faded walls surrounded it. There was a break to my left. I strolled through it. Everything looked relatively the same. Back and forth, I made my way through the ruins’ rooms and faded paths. Every so often I could swear I heard someone talking. When I stopped to listen, it was gone.

_Honestly… Of all the places they had to put me…_

Footsteps.

_Shit._

My heart jerked in my chest as I heard someone on the other side of a wall. I crept to its edge and peered out. A group of people wearing various states of dress in all manner of colors were walking by, facing me. None of them seemed to notice. I kept watching.

“Can’t believe he just expects us to be okay with this,” said a boy with sandy blonde hair.

“I don’t think he does, Vaan,” said a girl with equally sandy hair and pigtails. “We just need to tolerate him for as long as he’s with us. I don’t like it either.”

_Who are they talking about?_

No one on Eos dressed like the people I was looking at. No one on _Earth_ dressed like them, either. Except maybe at conventions and LARP sessions. Everyone seemed to come straight from an anime. A guy with spiky blonde hair was dressed all in black and carried a huge sword. Another blonde with a ponytail looked like someone from a renaissance fair. Next was a girl with pink hair and white gloves carrying a bow. A green haired girl stood with her. Then there was the two kids. They were dressed for somewhere that was a lot warmer. Last but not least was a small, blue, hooded creature with a hat and two white dots for eyes.

Curious, I leaned out a bit further for a better look.

Someone caught a glimpse of me. I jerked back into hiding.

“I think I just saw someone!” someone said.

“Think they’re the same as us?” another asked.

“Probably! They must be so confused.”

“Then what’re we waiting for?” a third said. “Let’s find ‘em.”

I ran. Just when I reached the end of the room, they spotted me. I could hear them running after me and worked to run faster. I turned right into more of the ruins. Then I turned another right. Whoever was after me called for me to stop, that they wanted to help. But I didn’t listen. I just wanted to find my brother and my friends and get to Altissia.

A left and then a right later and I slumped against a wall, breathing heavily. I covered my mouth so they wouldn’t hear me.

“Where’d she go?”

“Don’t know. These ruins are like a maze.”

“We shouldn’t waste time looking. She’ll come to us if she has any sense.”

“I just hope the monsters and Torsions don’t get to her first…”

“Don’t worry, Terra. They always find a way.”

_Terra? Why does that name sound familiar?_

I listened as they walked away. My fear of interacting with strangers reared its head. There were a _lot_ of strangers. I couldn’t deal with them all at once. My anxiety wouldn’t allow it. But perhaps I could follow them until I was comfortable enough to confront them? Yes, that sounded good.

It didn’t take long.

I managed to keep quiet and stay in the shadows for what felt like a good while. The strange group of people kept walking and walking. That path must be the main road. Wherever they were going, hopefully it’d be somewhere I could find my friends.

Then they spotted me again. I decided to go around that chunk of the ruins and wait. They beat me, though. And they had met up with more people. As soon as I snuck up to the wall, I spotted what I _thought_ was familiar. Light brown hair with the front styled up. My heart leaped with relief.

“Ignis?” I said, very sure it was him. “Ignis! Where’s Noctis? Where are we?”

Everyone turned. I stopped in my tracks at their stares now transfixed on me. The guy who I thought was Ignis…

“You’re… not… Ig-nis…”

All was quiet. Then…

“______?” the girl with green hair said. I took a step back, eyebrow rising.

“How do you know my name…?” I asked slowly. I was ready to bolt again.

“Please don’t run!” the weird blue hooded creature said. It sounded like a small child. “We don’t mean any harm!”

My other foot joined the first. Yeah, I did not believe them.

“She probably doesn’t remember,” the pink haired girl said.

“Remember what?” I asked. “I, um… Is this… an anime convention or something…?”

Not-Ignis and his friends shook their heads.

“Settle down,” he said. “It’s quite the tale.”

Blue Creature, Green Hair, and Not-Ignis introduced themselves as Vivi, Terra, and Balthier. Together, they and the majority of their friends told me about what was going on. Apparently, this world was under threat of things called Torsions. Torsions were basically tears in spacetime and were unleashing monsters upon a realm of respite. They had been tasked by a goddess and a god - named Materia and Spiritus respectively - to rid this world of said Torsions. Their guide, a Moogle they called Mog, had been separated from them on this island. They were going to find the Torsion located here and him as well.

A moment passed. And then I started laughing.

“Hold on, hold on, hold on,” I said, waving my hands to get them to stop. “Lemme get this straight - oh gosh - you’re telling me… that I’ve been taken from my home and dropped onto _one_ world… only to be taken from _there_ and dropped on _another?”_

“Um…” Vivi said. “Yes…?”

I laughed harder.

“Oh, this is _rich,”_ I hissed, laughing to cover the rage that was slowly boiling up. “Alright, so… Really, where am I?”

No answer. My smile faded.

“You’re serious…”

“Wish we weren’t,” Spiky Hair said shortly. “But that’s how it is.”

I crossed my arms. “And… what now? Am I just supposed to… join you? Because some _more_ gods decided I’m due for another impromptu world hopping trip?”

“We don’t like it, either,” Ponytail Guy said. “So that’s why we’re travelling together. So we can find answers.”

“Answers?”

“Like who’s causing the Torsions and monsters to appear,” Terra said. “We could use your help.”

I shuffled my feet awkwardly.

“I won’t be much help, actually,” I muttered shyly. “I just learned how to use a sword and… my magic is new and still needs work… I can heal, though. That much I can do.”

“That’s fine,” Pink Hair said. “Whether or not you can fight, we should stick together. The monsters get stronger the further we go.”

I sighed.

“Fine,” I breathed. “Um, but my people skills aren’t exactly the greatest, either.”

I received various chuckles and smiles.

“You’re safe with us,” Pink Hair said. I nodded. Terra looked at the ground.

“You really don’t remember?” she asked me with hopeful eyes.

“Remember what?” I asked awkwardly.

“You’ve don’t… know any of us?”

“No, I don’t think so…”

I gazed at each of the faces presented to me.

“I’ve never met any of you before in my li-”

My eyes stopped on one person. He was fairly tall, dressed in elegant armor, and his long, brown hair was parted to the side. His eyes lit up with an unrecognizable emotion when my own landed on him.

“...ife…”

Where had I seen this man before? I couldn’t recall a name to go with his face but he seemed so familiar.

I blinked. So did he. I blinked again. Nothing. I shook my head.

“Nope,” I said to Terra. “I mean, _some_ of you look familiar, but…”

I looked down.

“My memories are all fuzzy. Like… There’s weird chunks missing…”

Pink Hair nodded.

“A lot of us are like that,” she said. “That’s another thing we’re trying to solve.”

My eye twitched.

“You mean you got summoned here by, what, a _god,_ and she doesn’t know anything, either?”

Several people nodded.

“And… okay…”

I rubbed at my temples.

“I won’t be rude. But… That just seems… wrong…”

“Yeah, we know,” Sandy Boy said, for some reason glaring at Elegant Man. “But it’s all we’ve got.”

“Will you come with us?” Terra asked. She looked so innocent and hopeful. I caved.

“I guess…” I said, scratching nervously at my hand. “‘S’not like I have anything better to do.”

“Good to have you on board,” Balthier said. I shrugged.

“Whatever you say, Not-Ignis,” I muttered. I paused. “But, ah, um… who are the rest of you, exactly?”

I got various introductions. Sandy Boy was Vaan and his friend, Sandy Girl, was Penelo. They were friends with Balthier and were very wary of Elegant Man. Ponytail Guy was Ramza. Spiky Hair was Cloud. Pink Hair was Serah and her sister was also missing her memories. That left Elegant Man.

“Vayne Solidor,” he said formally, extending a hand. His name sent my heart all aflutter.

_What the fuck. Maybe I have met him? But my memories…_

I gingerly took his gloved hand. It nearly broke me when me he lifted my own to his lips and gave it a soft kiss.

My heart went haywire.

“Seriously?” I heard Vaan groan. Vayne gave the boy a stern look before releasing my hand. I just stared straight ahead, trying to comprehend what had just happened. The object of my sudden affections seemed somewhat amused.

“Come on,” Cloud called. “We got stuff to do.”

Apparently there were a lot more people they had gathered and recruited. For whatever reason, these gods needed more than a handful to save this oddly desolate world. And that wasn’t all - the two gods weren’t even working together. They had both summoned their own warriors with Materia being more lenient and Spiritus wanting control. His warriors had repeatedly tried to interfere with my new acquaintances’ efforts. The only outlier there was Vayne, who had been cornered by a so-called Emperor to fight for him.

“Another one…” I muttered.

“You have one, too?” Vaan asked. I shook my head.

“There’s one on Eos. I’m pretty sure all the ones where I’m from died out.”

I heard Vayne gave a small noise of disbelief behind me. He had been tailing me the whole, short way we had already walked. I wasn’t sure why.

“And… you and you…”

I looked from Vaan and Penelo to Ramza.

“...are from the same world but… at different points in time?”

“Yes,” Ramza answered. “But what is familiar to one of us is not quite familiar to the other.”

I blinked several times.

“Alright, then,” I said. “First world hopping, then magic, then more world hopping. I’m not surprised time travel got into the mix at some point.”

“Magic?” someone asked.

“Magic doesn’t exist where I’m from. Or rather, to the majority of people, it doesn’t.”

“That’s so strange,” Terra said. “Are there no espers?”

“What’s an esper?”

Several gasps met my ears. I shrunk into myself.

“Your world must be boring,” Cloud said from the front.

“Uh, not really?” I said, thinking. “It’s kind of a mess, to be honest.”

“How so?” Ramza asked.

“Uh, where do I even start…”

I swallowed and recalled the ending of Bill Wurtz’s _history of the entire world, i guess._

“Some people have no friends, some people have no food. The planet is warming. And the ocean is full of plastic.”

I licked my lips and thought more.

“Lots of people are fighting, though that’s not new _anywhere,_ terrorism is, well, terrifying, and the government is corrupt and just changed heads and is now partially led by the worst person possible. But I won’t go into that ‘cause we’ll be here a while.”

“Sounds like any other world,” someone joked. I shrugged and scratched at my head.

“That’s civilization for ya.”

“What about Eos?” Serah asked. “Is that any better?”

“Not really. My friend, Noctis, his homeland was just taken over by the empire of Niflheim. They destroyed Insomnia, the Crown City, and took this magical crystal that gives Noctis’ fam- Noct’s bloodfam- ugh… it gives his bloodline cool powers to protect their country and also the world if need be. And I was dropped right into the middle of it. You… haven’t happened to have seen him around here, have you?”

“Noctis? No, the name doesn’t sound familiar.”

I drooped a bit. “Ah, well. It was worth a try.”

“What does he look like?” Penelo asked.

“A little bit taller than me, black hair, blue eyes, wears all black. He can warp, which is when he throws his weapon and magically teleports to it in a flash of blue.”

“How?” Vivi asked excitedly.

“Remember that crystal I mentioned? That’s what it does, along with other things.”

“So Noctis is a prince?” someone inquired.

“A king, technically. He needs the crystal to ‘ascend,’ whatever that means, and the empire has it now, so… We’re trying to get it back.”

“Impressive, how much you know of this world,” Vayne said behind me, “after so short a time.”

“The first thing I did was read a history book about the place. Heh, I know it better than they do at this point.”

A loud growl interrupted the conversation. We were set upon by many smaller monsters and everyone but me and Vayne jumped into action. I actually took a step back in fear. Nothing attacked me. They had already said I didn’t need to help with the fighting since I was so inexperienced, so I just watched as they demonstrated their skill.

Then I looked to my right. Vayne stood there watching, as well.

_Why isn’t he helping?_

_Why does he seem so familiar?_

_Why does my heart go crazy when I look at him? It can’t be just because he’s insanely attractive._

_...Why isn’t he helping?_

“Our agreement,” he said, somehow reading my thoughts, “for me to accompany them for now stated that I stay my hand in their battles.”

“...Why?” I asked.

“They do not trust me. It is a well placed mistrust, in their eyes.”

“And in yours?”

He glanced at me.

“It might as well be,” he said. “I understand their hostility. Our history is rather rocky, as it is.”

I nodded to show I was listening. The fighting continued. I briefly wondered what Vayne was capable of to have them so scared of him fighting in their midst. If he was one of Spiritus’ warriors, then perhaps I should be wary, as well. It was hard to be, though. For some reason, my instincts trusted him more than anyone else here. It was like I somehow expected him to be the most honest with me.

He also seemed to be bitter towards these so-called gods that had summoned us here. In his short addition to the rather extensive story I’d already been told, it sounded like he’d rather do anything else than submit to whatever some random, overpowered _person_ told him to do. I admired that. I wished I could do the same on Eos, even if I wasn’t sure what they wanted from me.

_Did_ I know what they wanted from me?

A large gap was missing. There was a chunk between Costlemark Tower and a return to Lestallum that had me proverbially scratching my head in confusion and then… No, we _had_ made it to Cape Caem. And then… Steyliff Grove. Yes, I remembered that now. I also recalled the sweet memory of a send off dinner held in my honor. But everything after that… Something was _there,_ but I just couldn’t retrieve it.

_Glad I’m not the only one here who has stuff missing. That would’ve been more worrying._

Once the fighting was finished, I continued to follow them. They seemed fairly familiar with each other, though I supposed it was because they had been traveling together for a while now. I still felt hella awkward and uncomfortable in my own skin. I hadn’t been taught how to deal with interacting with multiple people from several different worlds.

Thankfully, their curious questions about me had died down and I had time to think.

_Two more gods to mess with my life. God, why does this keep happening to me? What did I do to deserve this?_

The more I listened to their idle conversation, the more I felt out of place. The people I was with seemed kind and determined. They were the kind of people who kept going no matter what. Here and there, I heard short but entertaining short stories of their travels back home. They all seemed so… noble and just. I was just… me. I’m nothing special, not really. Rather plain, to be honest.

Also, this Materia person was starting to piss me off. I just didn’t understand why’d she call people here to do her bidding without really knowing what was really going on herself. This was her world, right? So why should people from other places be forced to figure it out _for_ her?

Then there was Spiritus. I had Materia’s side of the story, but I wanted to know his. I wanted to know how he worked and how he treated his own warriors. If there came a point where I had to pick sides, I’d need all the information I could get. So the best place to start would be…

...talking to Vayne. Everytime I looked at him, my heart leaped and fluttered. I didn’t know it was possible to develop a crush in such a rapid amount of time. The thought of being the one to initiate contact first had me in an anxious, flustered puddle in seconds. So, basically, I was stuck with my own thoughts as I was too shy to talk to anyone else.

It came to a point where I started to distance myself from the group. There were so many new people and it overwhelmed me. I didn’t know how to take it. Back on Eos, I had been introduced to a small group of friends, but this was a small _crowd_ and most everyone didn’t know the others all that well.

Despite my anxiety, I still found myself beside Vayne. Sometimes I’d catch him glancing at me. He was completely unreadable, but he and Terra had this weird air about them that screamed “why don’t you remember me?”

Sighing, I stuck my hands in my pockets and looked ahead. Yet _another_ group of people was waiting for us right where the ruins led to a gorgeous field of flowers. My nerves kicked up a couple notches. I found myself slowing down until I reached the back of our own group.

Another oddly familiar face headed the people before us. His armor was a faded indigo and his hair, white. He carried a sword and shield of the same colors. His helm had two horns that stretched up to the sky.

_Man, this is trippy. I’m pretty sure I’d remember these people, though. They’re so… fairy tale-like._

Vivi went skipping up to the Fantasy Knight.

“We found another ally!” he said excitedly. He turned back to search for me.

“I don’t… remember explicitly saying I’d be their ally,” I muttered to myself. I crossed my arms. Several heads turned toward me. I shrank back.

“This is ______,” Terra introduced. “She’s a bit shy, but her memories are missing, as well.”

They introduced me to the Warrior of Light, who then introduced me to his larger band of friends: another pink haired girl named Lightning (Serah’s sister), her friend Sazh, an energetic thief named Yuffie (who knew Cloud), a knight in purple called Cecil - whose voice sounded _hauntingly_ familiar - an academy student named Rem, another white haired guy in armor named Firion, a dashing, blonde king named Edgar (a friend of Terra’s), and a girl in pink with braided brown hair called Aerith (also a friend of Cloud’s).

“It’s nice to meet you,” Warrior said. “I hope your journey hasn’t been too harsh.”

“Uh, not… really?” I said awkwardly. “I’m just confused and disoriented.”

He nodded. “Much like the rest of us. But we’re all here to help each other.”

_...He seems nice enough. But I still don’t feel right._

“Come. The Torsion’s not far.”

“And hopefully Mog isn’t, either,” Terra said. She cared an awful about the Moogle, who, the more I heard about him, seemed pleasant but suspicious in a too-innocent-for-this-world kind of way.

The field of flowers was something I hadn’t seen on either Earth or Eos. It was absolutely beautiful. Small, pastel blossoms of pink, white, and blue filled the landscape like algae in a pond. Mountains rose up high in the distance, and combined with the light blue sky, it almost reminded me of my home in a river valley on Earth.

_This really does feel like a fantasy land of some sort._

I began to notice my new acquaintances traveled in bunches. Not everyone grouped up in one large crowd. Instead, Warrior and some others were at the head with a medium sized group in the middle with the stragglers in the back. I was somewhere between the stragglers and the middle bunch with Vaan, Vayne, Terra, Ramza, and various others.

I was so busy admiring the scenery that I didn’t notice something being taken from my pocket.

“Huh??” a high pitched voice said nearby. “A… slab of metal and a chess piece?”

I instantly searched my pockets. My phone and the white rook I carried with me were missing. My head jerked to my right. Yuffie was looking at her hands with utmost confusion. The items from my pockets were in those hands.

“Wha- hey!” I said, panicking. “Those are mine!”

“What exactly does _this_ do-? Ooh, it lights up!”

I rushed forward to snatch my phone from her grip. She was too quick. Frost began to fan out from my feet and onto the flowers. I didn’t know how to handle thieves. What was I supposed to do?

“Please give them back,” I pleaded. Yuffie glanced me over.

“Hmm… Nope! Finders, keepers!” she said, hopping back. Electricity sparkled in my hands.

“Please, that’s all I have left of home!”

“What, the flashlight thing?”

_“Yes._ I don’t even know if I _can_ get home. So please… I need it.”

“Hmm…”

“Yuffie,” Cloud warned. I hadn’t realized he was back here with us. “We don’t have time for this.”

“Mmm- fine! You can have _this_ back!”

She tossed me my phone. I rushed to catch it before it hit the ground. I slipped it back in my pocket. I’d have to be careful around this one…

“But _this_ one looks antique! If I had the whole set, I bet it’d fetch a pretty price!”

My heart _lurched._

“No, really,” I begged. “I need that back, too.”

“Where’d you get it anyway? You don’t seem the chess type.”

“I’m not. I’m _horrible_ at it, ask anyone. But… seriously, it’s not right taking people’s things.”

“What’s this? There’s a vee on the bottom… Did you steal this?”

“Of _course_ I didn’t! Someone _gave_ it to me.”

_What? Wait, where **did** I get that rook?_

“I suggest you hand it over.”

That wasn’t me. The sunlight coming in behind me was suddenly blocked. I glanced over my shoulder to see Vayne sending Yuffie a _very_ stern look with narrowed green eyes and arms behind his back. She gulped. Even I was thinking of shrinking away.

“Just give back what you stole,” Cloud said, sighing. “You’re outnumbered.”

“Ugh, fine!” Yuffie said, exasperated. “What’s the point of traveling with you all if I don’t get any otherworldly treasures from it? But if you want it…”

She pulled her arm back.

“Go _get_ it!”

She threw the rook right past me, to my left, where no one was standing. With a gasp, I jerked to rush to it.

A gloved hand reached out and snatched it from the air. It retreated back to its owner.

“I believe this is yours,” Vayne said, holding the piece in the palm of his hand. I sighed with relief.

“Thank you,” I said, taking it from him. I held it with both hands and close to my heart, unsure of why it meant so much to me. “I’m not sure why, but… this means as much to me as my phone.”

That same unreadable expression was on his face. It was ever so slightly different from the one he showed the others. It was… actually the same one Terra gave me every so often. Like they were hiding an emotion deep within the depths of their hearts.

“I’m sure it does,” he finally said. He turned to join the others who were now continuing on their way. I stayed still for a moment. I felt for my phone in my pocket and looked down at the rook.

_Why do these hold the same sentimental value?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :D


	40. I Had Plans, I Had Designs; Seeing You Changed My Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New friends!  
> Old friends...?  
> And...  
> Politics????

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title is a lyric from Floweytale:  
> https://youtu.be/i-b_aeifxvA

“Chara, with you by my side,” I sang lowly so no one could hear me, “surface life seems just fine.”

“Hey, ______!”

I nearly jumped out of my skin. Whipping around I saw Terra standing behind me. Catching my breath from that scare, I laughed slightly.

“Oh, sorry! I didn’t mean to frighten you…”

“It’s all good,” I said. “Did you… need something?”

“Aerith and I were going to look at some of the flowers. Want to join us?”

“Oh, um…”

I didn’t want to be rude. And I might to be able to get some answers to some of my questions.

“Sure, why not.”

We didn’t stray far from the group. Aerith told us she grew and sold flowers back on her world, which was how she met Cloud. She was very sweet and welcomed me wholeheartedly on their little excursion.

“That’s a beautiful necklace you have,” she complimented. Confused, I looked down. I was indeed wearing a necklace, the object dangling from the chain looking like a Norse rune.

“Oh, thank you,” I said awkwardly. Then I whispered to myself, “Where did I get this…?”

We found a nice patch of blue and white flowers near a grove of trees. It was a relief to be away from the crowd for a little bit. Being alone amidst so many people I didn’t know had me jumpy and shaky. I watched Aerith plop down and begin weaving the flowers with expert precision. She taught Terra as she went. I mostly just watched and stroked the flower petals.

“So…” I said, rubbing and itching my cheek. “What do you guys know about Spiritus? I know you’re… Materia’s, right?”

My two new friends nodded.

“Why do you ask?” Terra inquired.

“I like to get every perspective I can.”

“I know he summoned Sephiroth,” Aerith said, stopping her flower weaving for a moment to think. “And the others who have tried to stop us were his, too.”

“I think he lets them cause chaos,” Terra said. “I know Kefka had Vincent under his control…”

“Vincent?” I questioned.

“A friend of mine and Cloud’s,” Aerith told me. “And I agree. I think they were set loose to thwart us.”

“But then there was Kuja with Shantotto,” Terra said.

“What’d he do?” I asked.

“He showed her that _we_ can make the Torsions. They’re not just from monsters.”

_This is getting more and more convoluted._

Aerith and Terra continued to tell me their own accounts of what had happened so far. As they spoke, I spotted something moving by the tree. Well, I say trees. It was more of a small forest. Someone was walking along the treeline. I recognized them as Vayne. He was taking a stroll. My eyes followed him until he disappeared within the trunks and branches.

“______?”

I jerked back to attention. Terra had been the one to get my attention.

“What are you looking at?”

“Oh, uh, nothing,” I said, shaking my head. “Um, hey, what do you guys know about Vayne?”

“Who?” Aerith asked. Terra sniggered.

“He’s from Vaan’s world,” she said. “An imperial and probably the heir to the throne.”

“Oh, wow. That’s… important,” I trailed. She continued to giggle. “What?”

“Oh, nothing. I just it’s cute how you’re drawn to him even when your memories are… uh… oops…”

I blinked.

_I **know** him?? But we’re from different worlds. When and where could I have have met him?_

_Man, I better get those memories back soon._

Something was dropped on my head. I looked up to see leaves and flower petals. A soft weight rested on around the crown my head. A flower crown?

Aerith giggled at my confusion.

“You can have the first one,” she said. I grinned shyly and thanked her. “You’re so pretty! Blue and white suit you.”

Heat crept up my neck to my cheeks. I looked down, unable to stop the grin from widening.

“You should talk to him!” Terra declared. I looked up at her.

“To who?” I asked.

“To _Vayne,_ silly. If you want answers about Spiritus, then he’ll be able to provide more information than we can.”

_But I’m so shy…_

“Well? Go!”

Shrinking into my jacket, I slowly stood. Aerith and Terra gave me reassuring smiles. With my flower crown still with me, I walked the short distance to the trees.

I walked along the treeline, gazing through the trees. I didn’t see Vayne, but I did find a small path. I decided to follow it. It wasn’t long. It led to a small clearing surrounded by berry bushes. More flowers sprouted up from the grass. And there, near the back, was Vayne. I took a moment just to admire him. He was utterly enchanting. It was like a Monet painting. The sunlight filtering through the treetops landed right on him, making the charming image of a noble surrounded by nature.

My heart decided it wanted to learn ballet. Shaking with anxiety, I cautiously made my way to where he was standing. When I was a couple feet away, he turned his head to see me.

“Uh, hi,” I said quietly, looking to the side. He nodded his greeting. “Um, so… ah… hmm…”

He maneuvered his body to face me properly.

“Can I help you with something?” he asked. My vision flitted to his face. Calm as ever. I tilted my head in my nervousness.

“Um, so I…” I licked my lips. “I heard you could… That you could tell me more about Spiritus and his… people.”

“And why would you want to know about that? You are one of Materia’s warriors, yes?”

“Ah, well… I don’t exactly know. I just kinda woke up here, so… I’m just trying to make sense of everything. And I’ve gotten one side of the story, so I’d like to hear the other. Not to mention I’m not really much of a warrior…”

“Mage, then. As for Spiritus, he wishes for us to do his bidding, follow his will without much question. I’d sooner die than acquiesce to such a god, or _any_ god, for that matter.”

“But what does he _want?_ Does he want the Torsions to stop?”

“I wouldn’t know. I haven’t spoken to him directly quite yet. I plan to, but for now, I am in need of more information, much like yourself.”

I sighed, arms falling to my side helplessly.

“This is ridiculous,” I breathed.

“Oh, I agree,” Vayne said. “Once I have it all figured out, I will take action.”

The conversation fell silent. His attention returned to the bushes once more. Although, he didn’t seem to really be looking at them. It was more like he was lost in thought. I gazed at the berries and smiled.

“We had these in my backyard,” I said with a sad smile. “Or rather, they were in a forest in my backyard. We’d pick them in the summer when they were ripe, wash ‘em, and then my mom would make blackberry cobbler.”

_Why am I talking so freely around him? I don’t even know him?_

“You speak in the past tense,” Vayne observed.

“Well, we don’t really do it anymore,” I explained. “And besides… I got transported to Eos, so… No idea if I can go back.”

“You have my condolences.”

I shrugged. “Thanks, I suppose.”

Another bout of quiet followed. My eyes were trained on the bushes. When I looked back to Vayne, I caught him observing me. He turned away. I continued to watch him.

_He’s so… pretty. It should be illegal to be that handsome._

_Seriously? You have to do this **now?**_

_**Yes.** _

More minutes passed. The thought to leave crossed my mind, but I decided against it. I still had one more question. Terra had already let it slip once. Somehow, there was a slight possibility I knew this man. But that was impossible, so…

“Why do I feel like I know you?” I asked softly. Vayne’s green eyes came back to lock with mine. “I… I mean, you’re not the only one… Terra is really familiar, too, but… I feel like… I know you the best…”

“One could argue that you do,” he said. “But we hail from worlds over, two different locations. How could that be?”

“That’s what I’m trying to figure out. But my memories are shot. There’s so much missing that I… I don’t know _what_ to believe.”

“Do you believe the gods’ words to be truth?”

“Uh… I don’t know. From what I’ve heard, they know as little as we do, so color me unimpressed, at least.”

He huffed a slight laugh.

“Um… Are you… planning to break away from the group?”

He quirked a brow. “Perhaps. Once I have all the information I need.”

“Can… Can I… come with you?”

That surprised him slightly. He thought over it for a moment.

“Would you not feel safer among the company of your companions?” he asked. I tilted my head awkwardly.

“Well…” I swallowed. “I don’t actually know any of them, and… I feel really out of place most of the time. But if you don’t want me to, just say so. I’ll understand.”

He paused.

“I shall consider it,” he said. I perked up and smiled.

“Thank you.”

He nodded. And then someone screamed. I jerked my head to the right in the direction of the scream. It came again. I looked to Vayne, who looked at me, and then back to the forest. I took one last glance at him before running off as another shout reached the sky.

I sprinted through the small forest, tree branches and bushes whipping by me. A few thorns got caught on my jacket, but I kept running. Finally, I burst into a larger clearing where a few of my new friends’ other friends were playing. And they were just _children._ Vivi and a purple haired girl were doing their best to look fierce in the face of a giant Behemoth. It snarled, and its tail was whipping around behind it.

I rushed forward and summoned my magic. My body forced its way to line up with the kids, shaking all the way. I was terrified. My arms pulled back like I was getting ready to push something and then thrusted forward quickly, my fingers curling slightly. Great spikes of ice shot up from the ground, piercing the beast. Spurts of red stained the tips of the spikes. The Behemoth roared loud enough for me to cover my ears. It was stuck on the spikes long enough for Cecil and few others to come bursting in and kill it off.

My arms fell to my sides limply. The wobbling in my legs had me searching for a place to sit down for a while. I hadn’t expected to be outputting so much magic in such a short spanse of time.

“Very impressive,” Vayne said behind me. I jumped and then laughed at my own fear.

“Oh, uh, thanks,” I breathed. “I panicked.”

“Your magic is in tune with your emotions. That makes for rather potent spells in the right situation.”

“Yeah… I once skewered a quetzalcoatl with elec- eleclec- electrilec- ugh… e-lec-tri-cally charged ice.”

Vayne’s eyebrows lifted with interest.

“A quetzalcoatl?” he asked. I nodded, swaying slightly.

“I passed out afterward, though,” I explained. “Woke up hours later in a panicked state.”

“Interesting… I assume your body isn’t quite used to the effects of magic, yet?”

“Nope, not in the slightest for larger outputs.”

I brought a hand to my head. I could fall asleep on my feet.

“________, are you alright?” someone said behind me. I turned to Cecil approaching me. “You look exhausted.”

“I’m not quite used to large portions of magic just coming from nowhere,” I tried to explain. He nodded. “My world doesn’t have magic, so I’m still getting used to it.”

Vivi and the small, purple haired child came running over to thank me. I complimented their own magic and made a few snowflakes for them. Then they ran off to join some of the others. The friendly smile I adopted for them fell.

“I think I’m gonna pull a Rip Van Winkle and sleep for a hundred years,” I said yawning.

“A… what?” Cecil asked.

“Just this… story from home about a man who fell asleep under a tree and slept for so long that when he woke up, he was an old man and everything had changed.”

“Sounds frightening.”

“I can’t remember the details, but it sounds pretty nice right about now. ...Do we… have time for that?”

“Perhaps. We’re due for a real break, anyway. I’ll let everyone know someone needs to stop for a bit.”

“Thank you.”

As Cecil left to escort the kids back to the group, I found a nice spot under an oak tree. I marched my over to it and plopped down, slipping my jacket off. I then used my jacket as a pillow and lied down on the roots.

“Are you sure the _dirt_ and _roots_ are where you should be napping?” Vayne asked, sounding very perplexed and slightly disgusted.

“I’ve had worse.”

 

When I awoke maybe an hour later, I was all alone. Yawning up a storm, I got to my feet and brushed all the dirt and grass off. With my beloved jacket back on, I hurried out of the trees before more monsters could find me.

The flower field hadn’t changed. It still looked gorgeous. Wind swept over it, causing the flowers to rustle cutely. I spotted a group of people in the distance. With no one else quite in sight, I made my way over to them.

Ramza, Edgar, and Vaan stood watching Firion walk up to Vayne, whose back was turned. I just barely made out their conversation as I came up the slight hill.

“I hear you’re from an imperial family,” Firion said to Vayne. “...You’re nothing like the emperor from my world.”

_I hope that’s a good thing,_ I thought as I came to the edge of the group. I decided to stay there and listen.

“The Palamecian Emperor, was it?” Vayne said. “And as here, he visited tyranny upon your world.”

“He used monsters to conquer neighboring lands,” Firion told him. “He’s an emperor consumed with avarice.”

_Note to self: look up ‘avarice’ when you get back to Eos._

“No people should be subjugated. He built an army to obey his every whim… and used it to rule the world.”

Then Edgar came walking up to them. They turned to face him as he spoke.

“Somewhat hard to forgive, wouldn’t you say?” he said. I wondered if he was trying to provoke him. “You strike me as a different sort, though.”

“He occupied my home,” Vaan said from the back. “The empire makes nothing but war.”

“The censure of an opponent’s citizenry leaves no room for retort,” Vayne said calmly. I supposed he was used to the hostility from Vaan.

_He’s got a point, though. What was it Ardyn said?_

_“Is fair to judge a man by the circumstances of his birth?”_

_Yeah, that was it._

“But in the interest of one’s homeland,” Vayne continued, “there come times when conflict is inevitable. Such is the position of a sovereign.”

_I guess he’d know better than us, at least. Er, me and Vaan, that is._

“Understandable,” Edgar agreed. “As king, I was responsible for breaking the superficial alliance with the empire in my world, engaging in hostilities. I can never lose sight of the innocents sacrificed to the ravages of war by my decision.

_This reminds of that Latin phrase I tried to memorize. What was it…?_

“...Is royal birthright all one needs to take the lives of others in one’s hands?” Ramza spoke up solemnly. Vayne addressed him, calm as ever.

“The emperor of Archadia is appointed by her people,” he said. I perked up. “Blood does not decide all.”

_That sounds nice._

_Obi-wan Kenobi voice: DEMOCRACY._

_Ha, not quite but… it does sound like Ancient Rome._

“That, too,” Edgar said, “must make for a difficult line of succession. After all, you need the people’s support.”

_True._

“What way with words I do possess is thanks to that,” Vayne said.

“A far better system than the Emperor’s brute force,” Firion said, frustrated.

_Dammit, what was that phrase??? Si vic… No, si vis… pacere? No, not that either…_

“What gives?” Vaan said, exasperated. “How can he be so well behaved?”

_He’s a gentleman and politician, Vaan, and you’re just a kid._

“That is how he is able to capture public sentiment,” Ramza explained.

“Listening to him talk,” Vaan kept going, “it makes me sound like I’m just a wrongheaded kid. I can’t tell what’s what anymore.”

_I want to side with Vayne, but I have little to no idea how your world works so I’m just going to stay out of it for now._

“You needn’t struggle to keep up,” Ramza told him. “Simply, when an unreasonable claim is made, call it out as such.”

They kept talking and I tuned them out. That Latin phrase was right on the tip of my tongue. Dammit, come on!!

_Si vis… para bellum… What was the third word?_

My mind registered Edgar walking over to Vaan and Ramza. I didn’t notice Vayne taking notice of _me._ Firion stared ahead, lost in thought. I forgot about him in my desperate attempt to recall my miniature Latin lesson.

As Edgar and Vaan stopped talking, I straightened up happily. With a smile, I recited the phrase to myself. Ah, that was so satisfying. A wave of relief washed over me, lifting a weight from my chest.

“What was that?” Edgar asked me, curious.

“Huh?” I jerked out of my thought zone. “What?”

“What you just said.”

“Oh, uh… Si vis pacem, para bellem…?”

“What does that mean?” Vaan asked.

“‘If you want peace,’” Vayne translated for me, surprisingly, “‘prepare for war.’ A fitting phrase for the conversation.”

I nodded in agreement. Then I retreated into my hoodie, hoping nobody would ask me any political questions. Thankfully, they were ready to drop the topic. So I made a new one.

“So, uh, where is everyone?” I asked. “I didn’t… actually pull that Rip Van Winkle, did I?”

No one understood the reference but me, and Vayne, somewhat. He shook his head.

“They are ahead. I offered to stay here and wait for you.”

_What? Why would he do that?_

“And I didn’t trust him,” Vaan said, crossing his arms. “There’s no telling _what_ he’s up to.”

“And I decided to stay with Vaan,” Ramza said.

“Firion and I were stragglers,” Edgar explained. “The flowers are especially lovely in the sunlight, wouldn’t you say?”

“I guess?” I said awkwardly. I gave Vayne a small smile. “Thank you.”

He bowed his head to acknowledge me.

“What were you even doing?” Vaan asked. “You were all alone.”

“Sleeping,” I answered simply.

“You were _sleeping?_ All alone? In a _forest?”_

He turned to Vayne.

“And you were going to _watch_ her?”

“Of course not,” Vayne huffed indignantly. “I would never do something so unbecoming. I said I would _wait_ for her, not watch.”

“Uh, I appreciate it,” I said, more awkwardly this time. “Seriously, I do. It’s sweet, but, uh… Can we… not argue? I just woke up and you’re kinda making me nervous…”

“Sorry…” Vaan said sheepishly. He gave me a pained yet concerned look. “It’s just… this is the second time you’ve… trusted him. It’s _weird.”_

“Second?”

_What???_

“Uh, oh, right…” Vaan said. “You don’t remember.”

“What am I not remembering???” I asked. I looked to Vayne to answers. He just shook his head at Vaan. “Hello?”

“She should remember for herself,” Vayne said. Vaan sighed.

“It is for the best,” Ramza told him. “She’s not the only one with missing memories. Perhaps it would better for everyone to remember at the same time. Then we can piece it all together.”

“They’re over there,” Firion said suddenly, pointing over the hill. “C’mon, let’s go!”

Vayne gave me one last glance before following Firion. I hurried after him.

_Why would you wait for me, Vayne?_

Behind me, I heard Edgar teasing Vaan.

“You know,” he was saying, “it might not bode well to question a woman in love.”

_WHAT?!_

I stopped in my tracks but didn’t turn around.

“In love?” Vaan sounded just as shocked as me. “Why would she be in love with _him?”_

“Well, it might not be love just yet… But she _is_ quite taken with him, wouldn’t you say?”

I began walking forward shakily. Was I really that obvious?

“How can you tell?” Ramza asked curiously.

“They’re rather in tune with each other “ Edgar said. “One quotes, the other translates. She seems to trust him, as you said. Sometimes people just click together, just as sometimes, people don’t always get along.”

“So they’re just drawn to each other for no reason?” Vaan said, skeptical. “That sounds ridiculous.”

“Not for no reason. Think of them like magnets who have never met before. You and Vayne repel each other like two alike ends of the magnet. However hers and Vayne’s ends instantly connect if you let them.”

_So we have chemistry, huh? I could’ve sworn we had history, heh heh._

_Forgive me, Pippi._

“Don’t think on it too hard,” Ramza said. “Just accept it for what it is. It’s her choice to make.”

“Doesn’t mean I have to like it,” Vaan muttered bitterly. “I can’t even imagine someone like him in a romantic situation.”

“Remember what I said about keeping up?”

“Right, sorry.”

_Lord, save me. I’m going to die._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was debating whether or not to keep that last scene in but I have no regrets. I changed the tags to read Vayne/Reader instead of “kinda” “we’ll see”  
> ;)
> 
> I mean, I still have no idea what’s gonna happen but we really WILL have to see  
> >:)


	41. Maybe I Can Nope Out Of This Situation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Choices are made, moogles are stolen.

When we reached the rest of the crowd, we discovered them to be waiting for us. Warrior came forward and welcomed us back. I noticed a few people I hadn’t met yet. A guy in black with white fur trim (Squall), a silver haired woman in blue with an eyepatch (Fujin), and the woman’s friend Raijin. They were at the front of the group. Vaan joined them. I stayed at the edge, hoping I wouldn’t have to do anything just yet.

As soon as we began to more forward, we were stopped by an odd looking sorceress. She wore a crimson dress with black fur. Two dark wings protruded from the back of it. Her silver hair was styled to look like horns. The markings on her face made me wonder if she was a witch of some kind.

“You’ve finally arrived…” she said smoothly, “to this deceitful garden…”

_Deceitful?_

“Who’s the deceitful one here?” Squall countered.

“Seifer,” Fujin said. “Where?”

“The sorceress’ knight,” the witch said, “fulfills the sorceress’ wishes. He is her shield, and preserves her life.”

“Like Gladio,” I muttered.

_Great. We have to deal with someone like Gladio? This’ll be tough._

A blond man in a white coat came walking up behind the sorceress. A moogle followed him.

_That must be Mog._

A dark energy pulsed faintly from the moogle. It latched on to my own dark magic. I narrowed my eyes. I could barely feel its presence, but it was there.

“What the hell is this?” the blond man said furiously. “Why is the disciplinary committee threatening the sorceress?”

“We got reasons, ya know?” Raijin told him.

“I don’t want to hear excuses!”

“You’re the one who asked,” Vaan said. “What a pain in the butt…”

“I’ll say…” I crossed my arms.

“Is battle our only option?” Warrior asked. “With Seifer, too, now?”

“We can’t let Ultimecia exist here,” Squall said. “She’s no better than your Garland.”

That had me turning my head.

“What does _garlic_ have to do with this?” I whispered, extremely confused.

“Garland is my own rival,” Warrior answered. Before he could continue speaking, Seifer cut him off.

“Cut the slander and bring it on!” he challenged. “All of you! Traitors, too!”

I jumped behind Vayne.

“No thanks,” I squeaked. “I’m good.”

“You can tell his stance on the matter,” Squall said. Everyone jumped into battle positions. Well, everyone but me and Vayne. We watched from the sidelines.

“That sadness…” Ultimecia said, “anger… hatred… loneliness… All shall be assimilated and flow into the dimensional algorithm.”

She lifted her hand.

“Do battle, children of destiny. I, too, shall join you.”

With everyone there, Seifer didn’t stand much of a chance. His own friends were determined for him to see reason. He was struck more quickly than I imagined.

_Man, Gladio’d wipe the floor with him._

Ultimecia, however, proved more of a challenge. Her magic was a force to be reckoned with. Several times, I wanted to leap out and heal the fallen, but Vayne caught me every time.

“Save your strength,” he said. “You will need it.”

Thankfully, they managed to scrape by and win. Seifer was on his knees.

“Is this knight…” Ultimecia scoffed, “spent? Useless man.”

Her back was to us.

“I am through with you. I will see you children again… in the Dimensional Labyrinth.”

_In the **what?**_

“Wait!” Seifer called after her. “I… I caught the Moogle like you asked!”

_Tough, buddy._

“Kupo?” Mog asked. He was hovering next to me and Vayne. “What are you talking about, kupo?”

_The fuck is a ‘kupo?’_

“I could finally meet back up with everyone, kupo! You’re a lifesaver! Thanks for helping me out, kupo!”

He turned to me.

“And you all found _____!”

I squeaked again, hiding further behind Vayne.

“Wow, that’s ton of strong light coming from her, kupo! The most I’ve seen yet! ...But also a ton of dark, kupo…”

“What’s happening?” Seifer distraughtly asked himself. “Aren’t I… the sorceress’ chosen knight?”

“Seifer…” Fujin tried.

“Don’t you come near me! I can’t stand _traitors.”_

“...You don’t even have faith in your friends?” Squall asked in disbelief. I detached myself from Vayne now that Mog’s attention was elsewhere.

“And you don’t remember what happened back in your world, right?” Vaan asked Seifer. “...This is getting kinda sad.”

“Who created these circumstances…?” Vayne asked himself.

“I know, right?” I agreed quietly. “What kind of world _is_ this?”

_One where we forget those closest to us… Dammit, why can’t I remember what happened after Cape Caem?!_

Vayne’s arm suddenly shot up to target Mog.

“Kupo?!”

“He’s got Mog hostage, ya know!” Raijin exclaimed.

“You said you’d stay your hand!” Vaan argued.

“Are you blind to your own situation?” Vayne reasoned. “This moogle uses gods’ names to manipulate men as though they were game pieces.”

_What?! Fuck._

“Mastermind…?” Fujin trailed.

“Are we supposed to cut him down on your say so?” Squall asked.

“I have just found my objective,” Vayne answered. “First, to break free from the fetters of these ‘gods’.”

“Revolutionary,” Fujin said.

“Help me, kupo!” Mog pleaded. “I’ll tell you anything you want, kupo!”

He faced me for a moment. I stepped back, looking from the moogle to Vayne and repeating that several times.

“I…” I didn’t know what to say.

“He’s hiding more than you realize,” Seifer said. I glanced at him. “Let him go… I need to pay him back, too.”

“Hand over Mog,” Squall said. Everyone took a fighting stance. I stepped back again.

_I do **not** want to get caught up in the middle of this._

_You don’t have a choice. You have to make a decision._

Vayne took one look at the warriors readying themselves to take him on. Then his gaze fell on me.

“______,” Vaan said. “Mog said you have the most light. You can stop him!”

“...Why?” I asked, frightened and shaking. “I hardly know anything about that… What is it, again?”

“Don’t you have moogles on your world?” Squall asked.

“No?!”

Vaan sighed. “She’s going to side with Vayne. _Again.”_

“Hold on. I’m not- I can’t even-!”

“It seems we are at an impasse,” Vayne said. “So strike at me. Evince the power to claim your path!”

“You asked for it!” Vaan growled. He glanced at me. “And you better not heal him…!”

_No promises…_

The battle began.

“It is the right of the powerful to hold the reigns of the future!” Vayne declared.

“Balderdash!” Ramza said back. I held back from sniggering at the word. “That’s just a sophist’s excuse for might makes right!”

“Don’t waste your breath on him!” Vaan said. “We’re past the point of talking!”

I took several things away from their conflict. One, never mess with Vayne. He has two modes: physical and magic. And he is _terrifying._ Two, I agreed with both sides and it was _really_ difficult to figure out my own morals. Vayne had a point - ‘survival of the fittest,’ anyone? - but at the same time, I wondered if that was truly the way things should be. Three, never mess with Vayne. Four, don’t run into the midst of battle to heal people. I didn’t actually do this, but it did cross my mind. Unfortunately, there was a possibility both sides would target me if it wasn’t clear who I was going for.

And five, _never mess with Vayne._ Not only could the man wield a sword like a master, his weapon of choice _was his fists._ He could send opponents flying in any direction and several people fell this way. And then there was the magic. He could send a wave of energy through the ground that dealt an unbelievable amount of damage. Also, his magic mode meant he was _floating_ in the sky. _And_ his sword turned into a tree of light that wiped several of his enemies out in seconds. However, I was mostly drawn to his mastery of close combat. I’d never seen anyone fight like that before, not even Gladio. It was impressive. I wondered how long it took for him to get to that level of skill.

...A wave of heat swept over me as I realized he must take incredibly good care of his body to reach that level of strength.

_NOW IS **NOT** THE TIME TO BE THIRSTY._

_**SHUT UP.** _

My blush disappeared as he fell. I guess there were too many of them. Matera’s warriors were just as skilled with their own weapons. Vayne was on his knees. My heart jolted at the sight of him in pain.

“Hnh…” he wheezed. “Not yet…”

_Fuck what Vaan said._

I rushed forward to help him up. He stuck a hand out to stop me.

“Don’t,” he said. “It is not over yet!”

He managed to get to his feet rather easily. Then, he sent a blue wave of magic through the ground and straight to Mog. There was a flash of light…

“Kupo?!” I heard someone say.

...When I could see again, Mog was contained inside a dark red, transparent ball. A humming noise came from it. Everyone watched as the ball floated up and up and up…

A created a _massive_ Torsion.

The dark red energy swirled around it rapidly. At the center was a sparkly, purple void. Several gasps met my ears.

“Mog is…” Warrior said, “driving the Torsion… out of control…?!”

I let out a small whimper.

_Why am I here?! I don’t like this world…!_

“...I see,” Vayne voiced. “So that is where it is.”

He looked to me.

“You said you wished to join me?”

I perked up and nodded. This seemed hella dangerous… but I’d already aligned myself with him when I tried to heal him.

“Come. We mustn’t waste time.”

Realizing I didn’t know all the mechanics of this world, one gloved hand took mine - and we began to _fly_ up to the Torsion.

_Wait, we’re going **inside** it?!_

Right as we reached the inside, Vayne quickly dodged to the left. Something of gargantuan size was trying to leave the Torsion. It was white with six wings and a face I couldn’t comprehend. We landed on nothing. Only starlight made up the floor.

“Is that an archangel?!” I asked.

“Hush,” Vayne said. “Follow me.”

Ahead was a large mass of stone. We stepped onto it. Rocky ruins and stalagmites made the landscape. There wasn’t really a sky. An infinite cosmos stretched up, red and blue and purple. I looked as far as I could. Still no Earth.

_When can I go home?_

“We mustn’t waste time. Hurry.”

Vayne was following the moogle in its sphere. I hurried behind him, looking around his shoulder at Mog.

“What _is_ that thing?” I asked.

“I’ve no idea,” my new companion said. “What I _do_ know is that we musn’t let its influence spread.”

“Right.”

We traversed the first small islands of rock in silence. I took Vayne’s left side so I could actually see his face and not just those beautiful, brown locks of his. The dark energy now radiated off of Mog. Several times I stumbled as I felt it feeding off our own magic. There was definitely something wrong with him.

“So…” I said, trying to fill the silence. I also felt a strange need for his attention. “Why’d you bring me with you?”

“You asked me to, did you not?”

“Well, yeah, but… I’ll admit I didn’t think you would…”

He glanced at me.

“My reasoning is my own,” he said simply.

“Oh, sorry… I didn’t mean to pry…”

A sigh left him. I fiddled with the chess piece in my pocket. Then I took it out and examined the bottom. Yuffie had been right; the letter V was engraved on the bottom. My eyes flickered back up to Vayne, who turned his head as soon as I caught him watching me.

_Did… **Vayne** give me this?_

_No, that’s impossible. You’ve never met the man before._

_Then where did I get it?_

_Man, I wish Noctis was here. He might be as clueless as me, but then someone I actually **know** would be here._

_Wait. Some people have met before, right? Like Warrior and Terra and Cloud. They seemed pretty familiar with each other. And then there’s Vaan and Vayne and Cecil._

“Um, can I ask you something?” I asked hesitantly. My anxiety flared up, causing my chest to contract nervously.

“What is it?”

“I know certain people here have met before… Have you ever met Noctis?”

“...Your brother, yes?”

“Yeah.”

No answer.

_Well, that’s suspicious._

I remained silent, unsure of what to say. We continued our power walking for the next island in silence. When we came to one of the small bridges connecting the stone mass, I glanced back up at Vayne. He was a master at masking his emotions, but at that moment, it was clear that fight had tired him more than he was expecting. While his eyes might’ve been slightly narrowed in determination, it was also in exhaustion. I hoped we’d get a chance to rest again. I felt fine after walking with my friends on Eos for so long, but I wasn’t sure how long Vayne could keep himself up.

I didn’t want to take any chances. _And_ I found I cared for him. So, I placed one hand on his arm. His head turned to face him. I gave him my best concerned expression and let the magic flow. He realized what I was doing and tried to inch away but he was too late.

“No, ______. Don’t-!”

And lemme just say… One word: **Ouch.**

The pain was both sharp _and_ dull. Aches spread all over my body from all the blows he had _somehow_ endured. Any scratches he might have had disappeared and -

_Something_ in this world or dimension or whatever was very, very _wrong._ I instantly collapsed and it wasn’t from feeling what he had gone through. No, it was exhaustion of my own and from using just a fraction of my power. Something was sapping the energy from me. I spiraled into a panic attack.

_I’m dying. I’m dying. Oh god I’m dying._

My breathing picked up to an almost inhuman pace and my heart followed it. Chest heaving with hyperventilation, I lifted one hand to slip under my glasses and cover my eyes. I was on my knees. The other hand reached out for something, _anything._

Panic as well as pain coursed through every cell in my body. My chest was light and tingly and my heart was dancing for all the wrong reasons. My thoughts flurried and snowballed.

_Oh god I’m dying. And I never got to say goodbye to Noctis._

_It hurts…_

_Vayne probably hates me for slowing him down._

_Everyone hates me for taking his side._

_It hurts._

_Noctis isn’t even here and I’ve disappointed him without him even knowing._

_It hurts!_

_**I never got to see home again.** _

_What would Ignis think?_

_What would Prompto think?_

_What would Gladio think?_

_IT HURTS._

_They’d all hate me. I’m never going to Eos again and I’m never going to see **Earth** again and I’ll die without someone who loves me here to say goodbye…!_

“Shh, shh, shh. Take a deep breath. You need to calm down.”

A voice…! Was someone coming to take me away?

“I ca- I _can’t-!”_ I tried to say. I couldn’t breathe. I gasped desperately for breath. I hadn’t even noticed I was crying. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

_“Breathe,_ ______. Do it with me, now. In…”

I gulped in a deep breath and attempted to hold it. It didn’t last long, but it helped.

“I didn’t mean to,” I said to no one. “I’m sorry.”

“Again. In.”

Deep, deep breath. I held it longer.

“Out….”

I released it all. On the voice’s command, I inhaled… and exhaled… And again…

A moment passed. The pain was gone. My throat felt raw. Had I been screaming? I didn’t know. I felt two hands on each of my arms, holding me securely in place. Somehow, I had curled up on the ground, knees pulled up and rocking.

The tears started pouring. I was a pathetic mess. _Why_ did he take me with him? And _why_ did he stay with me?

“Come now, there’s nothing to cry about. You’ve done nothing wrong.”

_I wouldn’t have expected him to be good at comforting people. Guess that was a correct hunch._

When I took my glasses off to clean them, I glanced pitifully up at him. Vayne was kneeling over me and looked extremely uncomfortable. I supposed he didn’t have to deal with anxious messes very often.

_I’m sorry._

“What happened…?” I asked. “I’ve never…”

I hiccuped.

“Had a panic attack after healing…”

“Hmm… I suspect that moogle has something to do with this… Are you feeling alright? Can you continue?”

I looked down.

“I think so…” I said. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to- to slow us down…”

“...You were shouting.”

“...What?”

“At me. You were shouting at me to save you.”

I blinked at him.

“Why?” I asked, confused. I pulled my jacket further around me.

“I haven’t the slightest idea,” Vayne said, just as perplexed as me. “Something about… death, and fate…”

I furrowed my eyebrows.

“I have no idea why,” I said. He helped me to my feet. “But… Thank you. You didn’t have to do that.”

He scoffed. “Nonsense.”

“What?”

“If I hadn’t, we’d be here for much longer.”

Instead of feeling bad, I just found myself laughing. And then… I kept laughing, giggling even. And I wasn’t sure _why._ His uncomfortable yet slightly flustered expression had me in shambles.

“Are you done…?”

“Sorry, sorry,” I said. “You’re just… You’re so cute.”

_Wait, WHAT?!_

My hand clamped over my mouth, eyes widening. I hadn’t meant to say that out loud. A very frustrated sigh left Vayne. He didn’t look so out of his element anymore. Just annoyed.

“Yes, well, if you’re fine, let us keep going.”

“Right, sorry.”

Mog’s bubble of doom began to shake. It vibrated pulses of darkness. It sent off waves of an unknown will. A blackened will.

“Damn,” Vayne muttered. “Quickly, now.”

We hurried through the rest of the Dimensional Labyrinth.

“Wait, why were we hurrying before?” I asked, struggling to keep up.

“There are others who would use this to their own wills,” Vayne said. “For personal gain. They’d see this world overtaken by whatever it is this moogle hosts.”

“Hosts? So… It’s bigger than a cat, at least. Good to know.”

He laughed slightly. _“Much_ bigger.”

_Oh dear. Now I’m really scared._

We came to the stone entrance of more ruins. The arch as square and led downwards. The formations around us reminded me of Stonehenge. I had the privilege of seeing it in person once. This gave me flashbacks to those days.

_No time for missing home!_

We turned at the bottom of the stairs. Vayne went for a corner and I followed right on his heels. As soon as we reached it, the sphere burst.

“Kupo…?” Mog said groggily. “What happened, kupo? ...Kupo!”

He noticed me and Vayne.

“What’d you do that for, kupo?!”

_“Enough,”_ Vayne said strongly. “Tell us what it is you want with this world.”

“Kupo… I don’t know what you mean, kupo!”

“Your energy,” I said quietly. “It’s… messed up, to put it mildly.”

“You’re _feeding_ off of her,” Vayne seethed. He was enraged and yet, he kept himself still, kept himself calm. It was a bit frightening. “Off of the raging battle in her soul.”

“I don’t- I don’t know- You mean the light and dark, kupo?” Mog asked, shivering with fear.

_“Yes._ Now _tell me._ What is your objective? What aim do you have that would include feeding off the energy of an innocent woman?”

“I… I don’t _know,_ kupo!”

“Wait,” I said, stepping in front of Vayne, who had the moogle cornered. “Be gentle. Some people don’t do well under pressure. You’re not giving him room to _think.”_

“Room to-?” Vayne cut himself off. “That is the _point.”_

“Mog,” I said gently. “Just tell us what’s going on, and we can help you.”

I held up my index finger to stop Vayne from interfering. He huffed frustratedly.

“I don’t know, kupo. All this… this _energy_ is making me hungry, kupo. But I swear I was doing as the goddess said!”

“We know,” I said softly. “But you might have a parasite latched on to you. Can you feel for it?”

Mog looked down and paused. Vayne brought a hand to his forehead.

“This is a waste of time,” he said. I shushed him.

“It’s _dark,”_ Mog said pitifully. “So many things…writhing around, kupo. It… It _hurts,_ kupo!”

Dark energy suddenly burst forth from the moogle. I was pulled back and situated behind Vayne. Something black began to bubble up from inside Mog. It dripped down and pooled underneath him.

“He’s a daemon,” I whispered, horrified.

“No,” Vayne said quietly. “This is much, _much_ worse.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So  
> I’m going on a two-week long vacation in a week. I will not have much access to the internet during that, so here’s what I can do:  
> One, leave you this chapter and keep writing and continue to upload when I return.  
> Two, leave you this chapter and upload chapters up until the point that Reader remembers Vayne. And _then_ continue uploading when I get back.
> 
> I personally haven’t decided, so if you have a preference, just let me know! :D


	42. You’d Think We Had Stopped It, But No

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A much needed rest leads to a scavenger hunt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, the scavenger hunt will be explored further

“So,” a calm yet excited voice said behind us. Vayne and I turned to see an extravagant man hovering there. Ultimecia stood with him, as well as a large man in a suit of dark purple armor. “You brought the moogle, as planned.”

_What?_

“I have acted on my own accordance,” Vayne spat back. Mog continued to deteriorate into a pile of sludge, black energy pulsing from it incessantly. “It means to use this world as a feeding ground. I _cannot_ let that continue lest my own world fall prey to its grasp.”

“Come now,” Ultimecia said. “Why not let the beast loose? Let its darkness and hatred consume the world.”

“The chaos it wreaks shall be most divine,” Armor Monster said.

_“How_ can you stand there and just _watch_ it happen?” Vayne said strongly, appalled by their lack of concern. “Do your own worlds not have meaning to you? Are they not in peril if we let this _thing_ continue its feast?”

“Let all return to the void,” said a voice from an opening Torsion. A near naked woman floated out of it, two yellow snakes attached to her and hair defying gravity.

“Let it burn,” Armor Monster said. “The carnage will be sweet. Its destruction, satisfying.”

I stepped back, frightened of all the powerful beings in the room. If they attacked, we wouldn’t stand a chance.

“Let it turn the world inside out,” said another newcomer. An oddly shaped man in light blue armor came out of a new Torsion. “The Void will consume all!”

“The Void…?” I whispered in horror. I looked up at Vayne. “What do we do?”

We were the only things standing in the way of these villains and Mog, who continued to invert and pulse. I felt sleepy the more it continued. My magic was being sapped from my body.

“Give us the moogle,” Regal Man said. “And I’ll spare your lives.”

“Did Spiritus not summon us all together?” Vayne tried to reason, trying to buy us time. “Why fight when we can rid our worlds of this menace?”

“The Blackened Will,” Ultimecia said, “is not the only thing that moogle hosts.”

We paused long enough for Mog to burst into sphere of blackened light. Something at the center was pulsing and beating. It moved like a writhing tumor. Vayne took one look at it. Then he looked at me. Finally, he looked at the villains. A Torsion opened behind him.

With a swift movement, Vayne shoved Mog into the Torsion, closed it, and opened another. I was pulled through before the others could follow us.

“You hide it now,” Blue Armor said, “but I will find it posthaste!”

The Torsion closed.

 

“You should rest.”

“I told you, I’m perfectly fine.”

“I can take away your wounds but not your exhaustion. Sit down, at least. You’re pushing yourself too hard.”

“If I had known you’d be this _insufferable,_ I’d have left you with Materia’s warriors.”

“How is getting you to rest being insufferable? Last I checked, _I_ was the healer.”

“I am aware, but I am telling you: I am perfectly capable of continuing on.”

“And what exactly are we going to do? _Fight_ whatever was infesting Mog? On our own? Against those other villains?”

“If I had _time,_ I could’ve come up with _something.”_

“Right. Well, until you do, _sit the fuck down.”_

“Insufferable…”

Insufferable or not, Vayne still sat down. The place his Torsion had brought us to was a large castle overlooking the sea. It was gorgeous and huge and I’d never been inside such a magnificent place before. However, my awe was short lived as I noticed whatever that Blackened Will had done to us had made us exhausted.

The room we were in was a sitting room of sorts. Somehow, the lights in this place were still on. I’d managed to convince Vayne to “explore” and by that I meant “go in this room and sit down.”

He was very stubborn. But so was I.

I plopped down next to him. We sat there in silence for a good while. Several times, I almost fell asleep again. Vayne stared off into the short distance, lost in his thoughts. Occasionally he’d catch me watching him.

The room was dusty, but not too dusty enough to make me sneeze. I could smell it, though. That, and the scent of polished wood filled my nostrils. It wasn’t unpleasant, just odd. I felt strangely safe in that room with its weird smell. It was quiet and secluded and hopefully far away from the Blackened Will.

I spent some time scrolling through the pictures on my phone. Sometimes I would smile or laugh slightly at a meme or two. Other times, my grin would morph into a frown as I found pictures of my friends and family from Earth. It sent me into a small wave of depression at my lost memories.

I put my phone away.

“The lack of information,” Vayne said quietly, “is what bothers me most. How can we solve this without truly knowing what it is we’re up against?”

“You and me both,” I muttered. “These… memories I’m missing…”

I didn’t know how to continue.

“A frustrating point,” Vayne said. Silence reigned again. I slipped my jacket off and curled up against one end of the sofa, resting my head on one of its pillows. I then draped my jacket over me like a blanket. I heard my companion sigh. He propped his feet up on the coffee table.

“I wish Noctis was here,” I whispered.

“I’m sure you do.”

 

I hadn’t even realized I’d fallen asleep again. So much had happened in the course of a few hours that it rendered me incapable of staying awake. When I woke up, my jacket had been replaced with an actual blanket and Vayne was nowhere in sight.

I sat up. Glancing around the room made it clear that he had left. My heart sank and contracted slightly.

_He didn’t…_ actually _leave me… Did he?_

I put my jacket back on and then wrapped the blanket around me like a cloak. I quietly walked to the door and opened it to peer out. All was silent.

“Vayne?” I called softly. No answer. I tried again, louder. Still nothing.

_Please don’t leave me._

I stepped out into the corridor. The regal red of the carpet swept out to various rooms. The sconces were lit, so it wasn’t dark. That dusty smell still remained. This world was so strange. Why was this castle here if there was no one to live in it?

I didn’t know which way to go. So, I wondered what Vayne would do.

_He said he wanted information. So the first place to look would be…_

_...the library._

_But where is the library?_

No idea. Just pick a direction and go.

I went right. Gold joined the red of the carpet and led to a large staircase. I decided to go up. A giant chandelier had been hung above. Its lights flickered like fireflies. I almost missed a step while I was admiring its crystalline structure.

At the top, I could go either left or right. I started to go left, but my intuition said no. Right it was.

“Vaaaayne?”

No answer. Time to continue on. I gazed around at all the subtle yet beautiful details in the design of the castle. The vaulted ceiling arched up. The trim around the ceiling had been carved to look like foliage. The leaves twisted and twirled on and on and on. I followed them.

At the end of the hall was a large set of double doors. A plaque to its left had only one word on it: Bibliothece. I assumed that meant library so I hauled one of the doors opened. It was almost too heavy for me.

The scent of old books and parchment filled my nose. I nearly cried. Finally. Something familiar. I took in all of the library that I could. A desk sat to the left of the door. Tables and practically antique chairs were placed strategically around the room along with couches and armchairs. Another chandelier had been strung overhead.

And the books. They were beautiful. Shelves upon shelves lines the walls. A staircase led to a second floor where even _more_ books rested. So much knowledge. So much history. So much _culture._ With a happy gasp, I forgot my predicament and rushed forward to the center of the room. The second floor was calling to me so I hastily climbed the stairs. I turned left around the railing and began to look at the various labels on the shelves.

Unfortunately, my Latin was limited and I couldn’t understand half of them, but I hoped the books themselves would be in English. I took my time. At each bookcase, I’d stop to flip through anything that looked interesting. Indeed, the books were legible and I was able to understand them. I found an array of genres: historical nonfiction, early science fiction, a book of myths (which I took to keep), medicinal practices, fairy tales (which I also took to keep), an atlas of a world that sounded familiar (which I took to look through while I waited to see if Vayne returned), various dictionaries and reference tomes, and - _a book of magic._

Near the end of the left side of the second floor was a whole bookcase dedicated to magic and alchemy. Granted, I couldn’t understand half of what they said, so I found a beginner’s guide to the arcane arts for a start. Then I noticed the writing.

Instead of a bookcase, the wall at the very end was barren. Two words had been carved into it by a master stone carver.

“‘Scientiā solidor,’” I read aloud. “Scientiā solidor… Scientiā solidor… That’s Ignis’ last name… Knowledge.”

_What does ‘solidor’ mean? Isn’t that Vayne’s last name?_

I hummed in thought, clutching my books.

_Maybe there’s a Latin dictionary - WAIT. My phone!_

I had installed a Latin dictionary on my phone. I took it out and prayed to any god listening that it worked without Wifi.

It _did._

“‘Solidare’,” I whispered to myself. “‘Make firm/solid, strengthen, consolidate.’”

When I looked back up, I noticed a thin strip of paper peeking out from the shelf next to me. I pulled it out.

_Scientiā solidor, sed scientia nonnunquam prohibeor. Inquire librum animae. Id potest adducere veritatī._

“Great, well,” I licked my lips, “let’s go translate some stuff.”

I took the paper to a table in the left corner of the second floor. I set my books down and used my mobile dictionary and the Notes app to make a rough translation of what the paper said.

_I am strengthened by knowledge, but knowledge sometimes is forbidden. Seek the book of spirit. It can lead to the truth._

“Scientiā solidor,” I repeated. “Scientiā solidor… Ha ha, I like saying that. Scientiā solidor… Scientiā-”

_“Whatever_ are you doing?”

“-solid-AHH!”

My body _wrenched_ to the side. I flattened myself against my chair before realizing who it was.

“Vayne, holy shit,” I breathed, catching my breath. “You scared the hell out of me.”

“My apologies. Now, care to explain _why_ you are repeating the name of my House over and over?”

“Look.”

I showed him the paper and my translation. My heart was still rapidly beating. A moment passed.

“You translated this?” he asked, sounding a tad impressed. I nodded. “You’ve done well.”

“Uh, thanks,” I said, still recovering. He set the paper down and gave me a stern look. “What?”

“I came back to the parlor and you were _gone._ Forgive me for being _concerned.”_

I blinked and looked away. “I woke up and _you_ were gone.”

I paused.

“I thought… I thought you had left me…”

The greatest sigh left him as he took the chair across from me.

“It’s crossed my mind,” he admitted. “You are _utterly_ infuriating.”

I slumped in my seat.

“I’m sorry,” I murmured.

“And then there’s _this.”_

I glanced up. “You just gestured to _all_ of me.”

“Exactly. You’re curious and outspoken one moment, and then shy and withdrawn the next. I can hardly keep up or understand…”

I lowered my head like a sad puppy.

“I’ll… stay here if you want to go,” I said.

“Absolutely not. I made a promise and I intend to keep it.”

I gave him a perplexed look.

“I’d rather not go into specifics right now.”

“Okay…”

Silence.

“Where did you go…?”

He sighed again, lowering his cold gaze. “I was looking for, well, _this.”_

He gestured to the library.

“But it would seem you found it before me.”

“And on the first try.”

I grinned. He said nothing. My grin faded. He looked to the books I had collected. The atlas I’d found was on top. He took it and opened it to a random page.

“This is…” he gasped. “Where did you find this?”

“Somewhere up here,” I answered shortly. “What is it?”

“This is a map of Ivalice. My home.”

“So _that’s_ why it sounded familiar.”

He glanced up at me and then looked to the piece of paper.

“And where did you find _that?”_ he asked. I stood up, took the paper, and led Vayne to the wall with his and Ignis’ last names on it. “Scientiā solidor… And the librum animae must be around here, I presume?”

I shrugged. “I hadn’t gotten that far. Maybe its on one of the shelves…?”

We started at each end of the west wall. Unfortunately, I wasn’t nearly as tall as Vayne, so I couldn’t read the top shelves. What I _could_ see never had anything to do with the spirit or the mind or any of ‘animae’s’ other translations. I checked the bookcase of magic first, then its neighbor, which was on the law and government of various places. The third was chock full of plays from various places I’d never heard of (although I did take a copy of Shakespeare’s most famous works). The fourth didn’t have a set genre and neither did the fifth. When I reached the sixth set of shelves, Vayne had reached his sixth as well.

_Wait… This shelf is all about psychology… And the anima is one of Carl Jung’s theories…_

I frantically poured over the different titles for anything by or about Jung. The hairs on my arms stood up as I registered Vayne watching me in my frenzy, but I paid him no mind. I passed some of Freud’s and scoffed slightly as I’d never really liked him much, as big as his influence was. The thought of how this world got ahold of Earth’s literature and science crossed my mind but I set that question aside for later.

“Ah! Found it!” I said. But… “It’s right… there…”

I couldn’t reach it. It was on a shelf _just_ beyond my reach. My hand stretched up and couldn’t even touch it. Even standing on my toes didn’t work.

Then a hand that wasn’t mine reached up. Someone was nearly pressed against me. They grabbed the book and brought it down.

“‘The Undiscovered Self’...?” Vayne read. He was _right behind me._ “I fail to see how this relates to the spirit.”

Heat spreading to my cheeks in rapid time, I turned around and took the book from him. Then I pointed to the author’s name.

“Carl Jung was one of the influences of modern psychology on Earth,” I explained. “I did a school project on him once. One of his theories was called the animus and the _anima._ And I couldn’t find anything else. On a… readable level, at least…”

“You’re quite well versed on the workings of your world.”

“Eh, most of what I know is just useless trivia.”

“Still, you continue to impress me.”

I looked down shyly, letting my hair curtain my face. The book was taken from my hands. Once he opened it, another slip of paper fell out.

“Ah, so it’s a scavenger hunt. This had better be worth our time…”

I leaned down to the get the paper. Great. More Latin. Not that I minded, but it was getting a little annoying.

“Here, let me see.”

He glanced over it. A moment went by. I waited patiently.

“What’s it say?” I asked.

“This… is hardly reasonable…” Vayne muttered. “Whoever wrote it obviously is not fluent in Ancient Archadian…”

“Ancient Arch- You mean Latin?”

“Is that what you call it?”

“Yeah. The _Romans_ spoke it. Probably half of English is derived from it as well as the Romance Languages.”

“Roman…? Romānī must refer to that, then. What do you know of the Roman gods?”

I perked up. “I never say this and certainly not confidently, but you are _really_ lucky you have _me._ I _love_ mythology. What’s it say?”

He glanced back down at the paper.

“The image of Venus gives way to Minerva’s wisdom.”

“Way-noose… Oh! Venus.”

Vayne gave me repugnant expression.

“I beg your pardon?” he asked. I lightly slapped his arm.

“Get your mind outta the gutter,” I laughed. “Venus is the Roman goddess of love and beauty.”

“So we’re looking for a statue of some sort. It is most likely on the first floor.”

Seeing as Vayne wasn’t familiar with Earth myths, we stuck together this time. However, there was hardly anything in the way of statues or art in the library. There were maps and globes of places neither of us had ever heard of before, but no statues. Both of us were getting frustrated until we came to the conclusion that perhaps it wasn’t _in_ the library after all.

“As amusing as this has been,” Vayne said, “I don’t believe we have time for treasure hunting.”

“Awww…” I drooped, disappointed. “I’m keeping this, though.”

I folded the two slips of paper we had collected and put them in my pocket. Maybe we could come back later and solve whatever mystery this had become.

“Did you get _any_ rest?” I asked Vayne as we descended to the first floor of the castle.

“I wasn’t gone for long,” he sighed. “It had been at _least_ half an hour.”

“Mm… Fine, good enough. Where are we going?”

“I thought we’d see how Materia’s band is faring in the Dimensional Labyrinth.”

“Dimensional Labyrinth… If someone told me a little over a month ago that my life would become a crazy, interdimensional, fantasy quest, I would have been both excited and scared for their sanity.”

Vayne chuckled. “Something we have in common, then.”

When we reached the bottom of the stairs, he opened a Torsion. Then he gestured to it.

“Ladies first.”

I hesitated. The gaping, dark purple center of the Torsion surrounded by the swirling mass of plasma scared me, to be honest.

“Is it… safe?” I asked, glancing up at him. He nodded. I crept toward it and stuck a hand through. There was nothing on the other end. It was strangely cold and felt like air. “Oh, this is weird…”

“Any day, now.”

I braced myself and walked through.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo  
> I’m going to be gone for two weeks. But don’t worry - I have up to Chapter 49 written, so there will be plenty of content when I get back. Hopefully Vayne’s event in Opera Omnia will happen soon (I’ve been farming for all the crystals to strengthen him. Now I just need to work towards Noctis’). And hopefully Act 2, Chapter 3 will come out soon so I can continue the story.  
> ANYWAY  
> I will return in two weeks~ I hope you guys have a great two weeks as well~


	43. In Which I Argue With A God And Vayne Reviews His Life Choices On This Planet Thus Far

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The “Interlude...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’M BACK!!!!  
> I hope you guys missed me ‘cause I’ve got chaaapteerrrrrs~!!!
> 
> Anyway, read on, my friends. There’ll be another note at the end concerning some shtuff.

“Vayne,” a deep, accented voice greeted us. “And ______. Good of you to have retrieved her for me.”

“Spiritus…” Vayne hissed under his breath. I moved to stand next to him. I had a feeling we weren’t where Vayne had intended us to be. “To what do we owe the pleasure…?”

“Materia’s warriors have reached the end of the Labyrinth. They’ll deal with the moogle and its parasite and then, hopefully we can send you home.”

“What about their missing memories?”

“What of them?”

“Should they not regain them? I’ve witnessed the effect myself. They should have their lives in their own hands.”

“Be that as it may, I’ve no idea how to go about it. Materia and I did not take them ourselves.”

“What about what Mog said,” I whispered to Vayne, who was getting agitated about the lack of competence this god showed. “About the other things inside?”

“Other things?” Spiritus said. “There’s _more?_ Of course there is…”

He looked at me.

“It is good I summoned you, _______. Perhaps the chaos you wreak between groups will pay off.”

_What?!_

“You mean to use her as a _pawn?”_ Vayne seethed. “I will _not_ allow it.”

“You’ve grown close since last you met. I expected as much. Materia might be fond of such relationships, but I am for differing reasons. I summoned her for _you,_ Vayne. Because of your shared interests in regaining control.”

I blinked. “What?”

“Her memories are among the missing,” Vayne said. I nodded in agreement. “She doesn’t remember the… calamity we faced.”

“The what?”

“Then find a way to make her remember.”

“Hold on!”

I’d _had_ it. ...But I still hesitated.

“Oh?” Spiritus voiced. “Speak up, little healer.”

“Let me get this straight,” I said, crossing my arms. My anxiety had my frantic heart telling me to _shut the hell up,_ but I ignored it. “You took me from what became my second home knowing full well what had happened to me before that and expect me to understand all this without you explaining everything?”

“I didn’t think it would need explaining nor do I know the answers to several of your questions. Are my orders not enough?”

“One: no, of _fucking course_ they’re not. Two: you’re no god of mine, so why should I listen to you? And three: you’re not really a god. You’re more of a powerful being who’s like a really bad manager at a retail store.”

Silence. I had even surprised myself with my outburst. The anxiety I had gotten from being two worlds over from home had caught up to me but instead of having another panic attack, I got angry. Weird.

Then Spiritus started laughing.

“So, the kitten has claws,” he said. “Isn’t she adorable?”

My eye twitched. “That wasn’t the point.”

“I am aware. But you will realize this: you cannot return to Eos without my saying so. And neither can your beloved companion return to his home if what crisis we have here is not averted.”

_Dammit just solve your own problems!_

“If there’s one thing I hate more than rude people,” I sighed, exasperated, “it’s people being _inconsiderate._ You _do_ realize we have lives outside of whatever hell hole you crawled out of, right? You’re a god, right? Why can’t you solve your own problems _yourself?”_

“Or better yet,” Vayne added, “why not work _with_ Materia to fix this world and then return to your incessant feud?”

Spiritus didn’t like that. His temper flared with the flames in his dome sparking up. Vayne pulled me back.

“You dare think I need _her_ to fix this world?” he growled. _“No._ Her methods are far weaker to solving the overall calamity here. Only chaos and _change_ will fix this mess. I will allow you to stay here for the time being. But you are not to speak to me for only criticism of my own methods.”

Whatever small pocket dimension we were now had no chairs. Vayne might be fine with standing but I was still pretty tired from first arriving here, overusing my magic, worrying about Noctis and Vayne, having an emotionally taxing panic attack, and dealing with whatever was inside Mog. In shorter terms, I really wanted to have something to at least _lean_ against. My shyness would not allow me to ask Vayne if I could lean against him.

“This is humiliating,” he whispered to himself. “Forced to act at the hand of a god not even of Ivalice.”

“Welcome to my world,” I muttered.

“How do you bear being so far from home? Does it not tear you apart inside?”

“It does. Everyday. I’m good at ignoring things.”

“Whether that’s beneficial or not, I cannot tell.”

“At first, but then it bottles up and makes me bitter.”

He sighed, hands on his hips.

“This is no world of ours,” he said, “and yet we are forced to defend it.”

“There’s no one even living here,” I observed quietly, hoping Spiritus wouldn’t hear. “What’s the point if there’s no one here?”

“...A very valid point. If there’s no history to preserve or anyone to _make_ history, then what purpose does it serve…?”

Our conversation dwindled into thoughtful silence. I watched Spiritus conjure some sort of video feed of Warrior and the others fighting inside what looked like a malformed room made of monsters’ mouths and gray tentacles. Well, it looked more like a gray brain than tentacles. And in the center was a much bigger Blackened Will that pulsed and dripped. I felt sick just looking at it.

“Nearly there,” I heard Spiritus say to himself. “And then we can begin anew.”

Whatever he was planning, I didn’t like it.

 

As soon as Materia’s heroes struck victory, the dimension they had found themselves in burst into white light. The video feed ended. As Vayne and I came to proper attention, several people were summoned into the room. We found ourselves standing between another scary Armor Monster and a tall guy with long, silver hair carrying a katana. He glanced at me, smirking.

“I see the healer’s on our side this time,” he observed.

_This time?_

“I decided she would be useful, Sephiroth,” Spiritus said. “But enough of that, for now. Materia is rallying her warriors once more.”

The video feed came up again. Mog was with them. Somehow he had survived and was himself again. He mentioned he could sense other wills in the world. Wherever we were still hadn’t been fixed. Materia addressed her warriors.

“Warriors,” she said. “To repair this world, won’t you lend me your strength? I would have you make for the crystal core and ascertain if anything is there.”

“Why us?” a feline woman who struck me as extremely familiar asked.

“...I cannot leave my position for long. It is difficult to maintain this world.”

They made their decision to find the core of the world and see what was causing its crisis. With that plan in our minds, Spiritus closed the video.

“The moogle is no longer necessary,” he said. “Forge your own paths.”

_What? When can we go home?!_

“Hmph,” Regal Man scoffed, turning his back on the god. “As though I needed you to tell me that.”

He walked away without another word. Sephiroth chuckled to himself.

“...The center of everything,” he muttered with an unnerving smile. “If I am there…”

He, too, walked away, his own scheme forming.

“Spiritus,” Armor Monster 2 spoke, “I cannot guarantee I will act as you expect me to… There is something important to me. Does this present a problem for you?”

“None,” Spiritus told him. “My warriors are those can achieve what they will.”

_Then what does that make me?_

Vayne and I were the only two left. I glanced up him, hoping he’d have some idea of what to do. He closed his eyes, thinking.

“...I will not be a puppet of the gods,” he said slowly. “Yet… I lack knowledge.”

“What Materia’s warriors released,” Spiritus told us, “is in the vicinity of the crystal core.”

_So there **were** other things inside Mog. Great…_

“If you wish to see it with your own eyes, that is where you shall go!”

If there was one thing I had learned in the past hour, it was that Vayne did not like to be told what to do. A mood, to be honest, but also a problem at some points. He turned his back on Spiritus.

“...Hmph,” he breathed angrily. He looked to me, gaze softening ever so slightly. “I assume you’ll be joining me?”

I nodded with a small smile.

 

“This is… well, I don’t know how to feel about it, to be honest.”

The core of the world lied somewhere in what looked like the inner machinations of a steampunk factory. Everything was a sort of bluish turquoise. Scraps of metal and different machinery parts had me thinking it was a junkyard of some sort.

“This is where the core is,” Vayne said. “And yet… There is no set path.”

“What exactly are we going to do?”

“I’ve yet to make a proper decision.”

He stopped and turned, giving me an odd look.

“You strike me a somewhat independent woman.”

I shrugged.

_Not really…? I lean on my friends far too much, that’s for sure._

_In your situation, it’s not like you have much of a choice._

_True._

“Why follow me if you can make your own decisions?” Vayne asked. Something told me he didn’t ask that out of curiosity. He wanted to know where my loyalties were. He wanted to know how my mind worked.

“You seem like you know what you’re doing,” I said honestly. My gaze shifted downward. “And, uh, you’re kind of… the only one I trust here at the moment…?”

Was that true? Did I only trust him? Yes, I did. I did trust the others, to an extent. But honesty reigned supreme; Edgar had been right: I _was_ pulled toward Vayne like a magnet. On the outside, it might seem like I’d do fine on my own, but humans are social creatures. I needed guidance. Somewhere, somehow, in some cornered recess of my mind, I knew Vayne had proven himself to be a friend, even if he’d deny it. He had waited for me during my first nap, gone to find me after the second. Continuously, he had pulled me behind him in the face of danger… _And_ he’d helped me with a panic attack, which was no small feat…

And then there was the simple fact that I was attracted to him. He was a handsome, intelligent man. Tall, elegant, and eloquent. And damn me to a frozen hell if eloquence from such a man didn’t reduce me to a pile of mush in seconds.

_I guess I just have a thing for nobility. Which is a problem because I am a middle class citizen with hardly any world experience whatsoever._

But I wasn’t about to _tell_ him that.

“Perhaps not quite as independent as I thought,” he said quietly. I shrugged again.

“Anxiety is a hell of a mental illness,” I said with a grin and matching finger guns. He wasn't amused. “But, um, if you’d… rather I just go off on my own, that’s cool, too…”

He thought it over for a moment. His silence rendered me even more of an anxious mess. The longer he took to answer, the more awkward I felt.

“No, I couldn’t do that to you,” he said, shaking his head. “Were you perish on my watch, there’s no telling what sort of vengeance a protective older brother will inflict upon me. I’d rather not lose my life just yet.”

_Is he… **scared** of Noct?_

“Besides, despite past… conflicts, I don’t truly find you insufferable. A tad eccentric, perhaps, but never annoying. And certainly useful in certain situations.”

_Oh. Okay._

He had just admitted in the most nonchalant way that he enjoyed my company. My smile returned.

_“However,”_ he started.

Oh no.

“Despite your inexperience, our lack of information grows ever more. Were we to, say, spread out a bit more, we might find our way more quickly.”

“So…” I licked my lips. “You’re sending me out on a scouting mission or something?”

“Precisely. _Do_ try your best not to get lost, yes?”

“I’ll try, ha ha…”

We established a meeting point near the entrance to the place. Then, I went left and Vayne went right. We’d meet back in thirty minutes, mostly because being away from each other with monsters about wasn’t really the best idea.

Five minutes in and I was already bored. Everything looked the same. There was hardly any variation in color and it was starting to give me a headache.

Ten minutes in and I was humming Undertale and Deltarune songs out of habit. My eyes scanned every bit of the landscape (if you could call it that) as I could. Nothing.

Fifteen minutes and I turned a corner. A loud noise clanged nearby as something fell. I jumped stumbled over my own feet. Right as I righted myself, something big and purple obstructed my path. My eyes traveled up and up until… Oh.

It was Armor Monster 1.

I backed up and he followed.

“The healer witch,” his voice boomed. I flinched at how loud he was up close. “Where is your master?”

“Master…?” I squeaked. A quote came to my mind. “What master? ‘What am I supposed to say? Jesus?’”

“The nobleman you travel with. Where is he?”

_Straight to the point, then._

_Wait, did he just call Vayne my **master?!**_

Heat flared up my neck to my cheeks at the thought in a different context. I shook that (pleasurable) idea out of my head and furrowed my eyebrows.

“Vayne’s not my ‘master’,” I explained nervously. “He’s my friend.”

“Hmm… Despite my disbelief, my memories of you remain, sister of the heir apparent.”

“You know Noctis?” I asked in shock. “Where is he? Is he around here?”

“I know not whether he was summoned in this cycle. Do you not remember our glorious fight against the planesgorger?”

“Against the… what?”

_What????_

“Whether you will it or not, you will remember in time,” Armor Monster 1 declared. “I am Garland of Cornelia, and I demand you bring your ‘friend’ to me at once.”

_Ohhhh **this** is Garland! I thought Warrior meant garlic…_

“Uh, I can try?” I said awkwardly, hands picking at each other. “We’re kinda busy, so…”

“Then finish whatever it is you’re up to. I wish to exchange information.”

_Oh! Vayne will like that._

“Alright,” I said, kicking at the ground slightly. “I’ll tell ‘im.”

Twenty five minutes in and I felt like I’d been walking for hours.

“Go on a scouting mission, he said,” I muttered. “Practice your independence, he said.”

I spotted him through the junkpiles. He wasn’t quite where he said he’d be, but I’d take it. I hurried over to where he was. Right as I reached him, I stopped in my tracks.

“What the fuck is that…”

_Is that a… cat??? Riding giant, white stuffed animal????_

I rubbed my eyes to be sure. Yep. Still the same. I crept up behind Vayne.

“Hmm,” the cat said. My eyebrows shot up in complete befuddlement, “two gods and an entity that’s consuming dimensions. What have I gotten myself into?”

_WHY IS THIS CAT SCOTTISH?!!?!_

“Um?” I whispered, slightly terrified. “Vayne, what the _fuck_ is going on?”

“Ah, there you are,” he said. “Crude language aside… This is Cait Sith.”

I stepped back and jumped closer to Vayne as the cat greeted me.

“He’s a Sith Lord?!” I whispered, horrified. Vayne sighed.

“Forgive her,” he said to the cat. “This is my… partner, ______. She’s prone to making references no one else understands. Back to the conversation at hand… You do not take the gods’ words for truth, do you?”

“I’m just a fortune telling machine,” Cait Sith answered. “That’s a mite harder question than I can answer.”

Vayne chuckled. “So you say. However, you have a will of your own, do you not?”

“...What about you? Are you doing what the gods tell you?”

“History is woven by man. In all worlds.”

_Well, he’s not wrong._

“Nice sentiment,” Cait said, “but there don’t seem to be any other people in this world.”

“Precisely. Here, there is neither nation nor society. Only those chosen by the gods’ whim. It is most perverted. A man is human because of the societies he builds.”

_Holy shit. He’s… He’s **right.**_

“However much of a hero you are in your own world,” Cait countered, “what good is it without something to protect?”

“I have a duty to my nation and my House Solidor,” Vayne said nobly. For _some_ reason I found it insanely attractive. He had a subtle passion about him for the things he loved, I noticed. And I was _feeding_ off of it like a lovestruck teenager.

_Get your mind in gear. Stop pining and pay attention!!!_

“...if Cloud and the gang are fighting for something here,” Cait was saying as I tuned back in, “I can’t just leave them on their own.”

“I see…” Vayne said thoughtfully. “You will then join Materia’s warriors.”

“Yes, they’re my friends. Although…”

“For their sake, you require the information I hold. Am I correct?”

“Leave it to a politician to sense an opportunity for collusion. This’ll make things go much faster.”

I tuned them out again. Politics were not my thing and I had hardly any interest in them. Most of the time. Instead, I observed Cait Sith.

Cait Sith was a black and white cat wearing a red cape and gold crown. What he was riding on, I still had no idea and it disturbed me ever so slightly. It was large and white with small purple wings. It looked like a monster of some sort.

_Fortune telling machine…? How is **this** a_ fortune telling machine…?

“_______?”

_It’s a cat…?_

“_______.”

“Huh?” I jerked out of my thoughts. Vayne and our new friend were both staring at me. “Sorry…”

“Come. We have a plan.”

“We do?”

Cait Sith had found some transceivers. They’d use them to exchange information. And by ‘exchange information,’ he meant we’d just be listening in on Materia’s warriors’ conversation. I’ll admit, it sounded pretty fun. It was certainly different from what we had already been doing.

“So, what’s the deal with you two?” Cait asked. I acknowledged him with a questioning glance. “No offense, but you dinnae look like you’re from the same world.”

“...Is that… bad?” I asked, glancing at Vayne, who also looked at me.

“Not at all! But color me curious to know why a noble politician is traveling with a commoner.”

I shrugged to hide my sudden insecurity. It wasn’t that I had forgotten Vayne’s status. I just had a habit of overlooking the class separation. Noctis didn’t want me to treat him like a prince, so I didn’t. Besides, treating people equally seemed to my preferred option. I was used to being casual most of the time.

“I will say,” Vayne spoke for both of us, “what I remember will make for a lengthy story.”

“What _you_ remember?” Cait asked.

“A lot of us are missing our memories,” I explained. “Me being one of them.”

“That must be a mite frustrating.”

“You’ve got _no_ idea. But I trust him. With me at least.”

We came to an intersection to go our separate ways. Vayne pointed out a direction for Cait Sith to find something in. But before he left, he kindly offered to tell our fortunes. Vayne declined. I asked how it worked. All I needed was to ask a question.

“...Will everything on Eos ever be okay?” I asked quietly. It was a serious question but Cait’s method of ‘telling’ the fortune included a weird dance of him rocking back and forth and waving his arms. “...What is he doing?”

“You did ask for this,” Vayne said, as bewildered as me. Cait came to a stop.

“...The light will come pouring in, but it will cost more than you know.”

_Oh. Well._

Deep down, a strange emotion welled up in me. It was… overwhelming sadness… It pooled up from my stomach into my chest.

_Weird. Why does that leave such a negative feeling in me?_

I was quiet as we continued. Vayne fiddled with his transceiver, glancing at me concernedly every so often.

“...He is a just an entertainment machine,” he said quietly after roughly ten minutes of me being depressed.

“I know,” I said without much emotion. “I just… got this weird feeling. Like, a really _sad_ feeling. Like I know more than my mind is letting me remember.”

_Just **what** am I forgetting?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, so we’ve got a problem.  
> Dissidia Opera Omnia looks nowhere close to finished. And what’s more... Prompto and Ignis have been added in the Japan storyline. And I don’t live in Japan OR speak Japanese, so research is out of the question. Global’s only on Act 2 Chapter 2 and we’ll be getting Chapter 3 later this month. Japan is up to at LEAST Chapter 7.  
> So. I have a plan.  
> I’m going to try uploading a chapter a week. And if that’s not enough to stretch it out enough to at least get to Iggy (who comes in Ch. 7), then I’ll try every two weeks. The only downside to this is that I might lose interest in continuing this particular story (unlikely with the way I’ve been going lately. Let’s hope I don’t jinx myself there) like I did with the Ardyn timeline (see Falling if you’re interested).  
> Anyway, worry not - my love for XV and all its characters and quirks has not diminished and my love (and thirst) for Vayne is still growing yet (we’ll see what happens as I continue XII. I hope my characterization of him is okay - he’s only been in, like, two scenes so far and Larsa talked a little bit about him, calling him remarkable).  
> Don’t worry - Noctis _is_ coming. It’ll be a few chapters, but I WILL get there or die trying. Vayne’s event is coming in a month or two so it’ll happen then. The soul sibling reunion will be bittersweet, but my love for Noctis remains strong and standing.  
> Sorry ‘bout the long note lol. Thanks for reading, guys~ You’re the best. Yes, you. See ya in a week!  
> -Green  
> P.S. On the other hand, I have an in-the-works private fic from Vayne’s POV, if you’re interested. I’m almost sorry you have to endure my extreme infatuation with him but Autism brain declares “special interest!!” and I must manifest that _somehow._  
>  P.S.S. OR I could try writing the whole story from Noct’s POV. Could be fun.


	44. Garland’s Attempt At Matchmaking Leads To Conflict and Resolution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Were my assumptions wrong? Should I trust him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are!

“Oh! Before I forget, I met Garland while I was away. He wanted to talk to you.”

“You spoke with Garland? _Alone?”_

“He didn’t attack me, so that’s a plus.”

Vayne sighed and said, “I leave you alone for thirty minutes…”

“I… I didn’t do anything wrong, did I?”

He sent me an unknown expression. “Of course not. Now I know _not_ to let you wander.”

I slumped. “I was careful…”

“Yes, but I’d rather you not have a run in with that one again.”

I gazed at him for a moment. He was incredibly hard to read. I still wasn’t sure why he kept me around. Did he actually care for me? At this point, I was starting to believe that we _had_ met before.

“Thank you,” I found myself saying. “Whatever Vaan says, you’re not that bad.”

I blushed slightly and looked away.

“Kind of sweet, actually…”

I don’t know whether or not he heard the last sentence. When I shyly peered up at him, that same unknown expression was gazing back down at me. I managed to hold eye contact for a few seconds before he looked away.

_What was it he said to Cait?_

_“A man is human by the societies he builds.”_

_But he’s right. Dammit, he’s **right.** Other animals might have communities and travel in packs, but humans… Society is a lot different than a pack of wolves. Laws, power, money… What society is made up of isn’t really evident in nature. Our intelligence and how we utilize it sets us apart._

Vayne’s philosophy would never leave me.

We walked in a comfortable quiet for a while. I had long since stopped taking in my surroundings. Nothing ever seemed to change. Actually, the constant bluish-green color was starting to get to me. It wasn’t too bright to a normal person. Vayne seemed fine. But as an Aspie, I was sure Noctis wouldn’t like it either.

The sides of my skull started to throb a few minutes later. I brought up a hand to rub at the sides of my head. My eyes closed for a few seconds.

_Ugh, when will this end?_

“How are you feeling?”

I opened my eyes and looked at Vayne.

“Still tired?”

I nodded. “It’s too bright…”

“Bright…?”

He glanced around at the machinery junk pile.

“I wouldn’t exactly call it such.”

“Maybe to you, it isn’t. But to someone like me, it’s… kinda causing a sensory overload, along with a ton of other things.”

Shit, I hadn’t noticed how close to another meltdown I was. My heart felt tingly, chest light and yet slightly tight at the same time. I needed to get somewhere safe.

“‘Someone like you’?” Vayne repeated. “I wasn’t aware our class differences extended to biology.”

I giggled. “No, it doesn’t. I don’t know if it exists in your world, but I’m autistic. We’re pretty hypersensitive.”

He racked his memory for the term. He could’ve sworn he had heard it somewhere. Psychology was hardly his area, though.

“It’s a ‘mental disability.’ Our brains are wired differently from anyone else’s. Noctis is autistic, too. I’ll be fine, though.”

“If you insist.”

I was utterly relieved when we came to the entrance of a forest. It was dark and ominous, but it was easier on the eyes than the weird junkyard.

_You know what else is easier on the eyes?_

_Yes. Don’t start this now._

_It’s Vayne._

_Yes. I know._

“Is this more to your liking?” the man of my quick affections asked me. I nodded happily. The sweet smell of wood and leaves was a nice change from the musty scent of metal and smoke. We made our across the mossy forest floor. The darkness of the woods slowly helped to ebb my headache away.

It was eerily silent. No wind, no rustling of leaves, absolutely nothing but own our efforts met our ears. I was reminded of the Myrlwood and Malmalam Thicket. Hopefully no monsters would-

“It would seem we have company.”

-attack us. _Dammit._

These ones were much stronger than the ones we’d seen the others fight before. Wolves, specters, and a few machinations were upon us. Electricity made quick work of the MT-wannabes. Their circuits overloaded and they came to just in time to be put out of their misery by both me and Vayne. Killing the wolves left me feeling guilty but it was either them or us. And they’d attacked us first.

It surprised me how well we worked together. The combination of magic and physical attacks was something we had in common, it seemed. An odd sense of deja vu took over me as Vayne quickly took out a ghostly creature I hadn’t seen.

_Weird. This is getting weird._

Luckily, he was fine, so no healing was needed. I was thankful no more panic attacks were ready to be executed by my torturous psyche.

The forest didn’t stretch very far. Soon we came upon a cave. Cool air drifted out from it. The sweet, earthy scent of dirt and moss filled my nostrils. I had flashbacks to the caves I’d been in on Eos. We walked in without hesitation.

It was much bigger than I expected. Instead of winding passages that inflicted slight claustrophobia, it was a wide expanse of paths branching and intersecting among stalactites and stalagmites. The rock formations I saw were worthy of a few pictures.

_Shit, the flash is on._

The camera on my phone sent out a quick flash of light. Vayne stopped in his tracks.

“What… was that?” he asked me slowly. I shrunk into my hoodie sheepishly.

“Sorry,” I squeaked with a shy smile. “Just taking a picture. Forgot the flash was on.”

“Do be cautious. We don’t want to attract any unwanted attention.”

“Not to worry: all attention is unwanted to me.”

_Except for yours._

I received a concerned glance but he continued on with me right on his heels.

Not long into our impromptu spelunking session, Vayne came to another slow stop. His hand went to his transceiver. I couldn’t hear anything on the other end, so I waited patiently.

“The crystal core…” he said quietly after several moments. “So there is where I will find my answer.”

“You mean ‘we,’ right?” I asked. He chuckled softly.

“Yes, of course. Whatever is causing the rifts lies in the center of this world. That is where Materia’s warriors are traveling.”

“So we’re going to follow them?”

“In a sense. I hope to reach it before, however, but if not, it will be no matter.”

“...And then what?”

“...Then I will make my final decision.”

He didn’t say anything after that. His silence worried me. What wasn’t he telling me?

Our journey through the cave ended abruptly several minutes later. The end of the passages opened up into more junkyard, although this area was much more fortified. Walls wrapped around it, pipes and tubes running this way and that. My heartbeat picked up with anticipation.

“We’re getting closer,” I muttered. Vayne nodded “...What exactly _are_ you planning to do?”

He opened his mouth to speak, but we were interrupted by Garland’s sudden appearance.

“There you are!” he boomed. I started shaking nervously when his head turned to me. “I have been waiting. You’ve done well to bring your master to me.”

My eye twitched in annoyance as Vayne gave us both a perplexed look.

“How many times do I have to tell you?” I said flatly. “We’re friends.”

“No honorable woman would dress in such a casual manner.”

I looked down at my T-shirt, jeans, hoodie, and sneakers. Was he referring to my obvious lack of armor?

“This is _normal_ where I’m from!” I protested.

“Attire matters not,” Vayne cut in. “What is it you wished to speak to me about?”

“Spiritus has told me of your quest. You have information.”

“...I do. I have met one of Materia’s and struck a bargain. What of it?”

“...You are intimate with a warrior of Materia?”

_Holy. Shit._

My outburst of laughter startled them. Vayne sighed in annoyance. I gasped for breath between laughs and giggles. Given that Garland didn’t know who Cait Sith was, the image his words gave me had me in _stitches._

“We are exchanging information,” Vayne said, turning away from both of us. “I would you choose your words more carefully.”

“Is it not the girl, then?”

My giggles were cut short. Heat shot through my body to my cheeks.

“W-what?” I stammered. I looked to Vayne for help. He refused to meet my gaze. “What- why- what gives you the- that impression?”

“You are fond of each other,” Garland observed. “Forgive my assumptions.”

Vayne cleared his throat. “Yes, well, insinuations aside…”

He recounted his conversation with Cait Sith. I stood, listening and awkwardly warm. My terrible, _terrible_ brain decided to feed on Garland’s words. The wondering of what Vayne looked like beneath all those layers forced its way to the forefront of my mind. Given his prowess in battle, I assumed he’d be…

I swallowed thickly.

_Fuck you, Garland, and your stupid implied ideas._

_And fuck Vayne. Please._

_**Stop.** _

“Warriors are summoned here from worlds over,” Vayne said, drawing me and my blushing cheeks back to Earth- er, what was this world called again? “The perfect feeding ground for that which devours energy. This world’s existence is a threat to mine own.”

_Oh man. That’s a good point. If Eos is destroyed… What would happen to **me?**_

“You plan to destroy the crystal,” Garland said, “and with it this world.”

_Wait, what?!_

My head jerked to look at Vayne directly.

“What…?” I whispered.

_Is that the right thing to do?_

“I even have a guide to lead me,” Vayne continued, ignoring my distress. “Far wiser than challenging gods with unmeasured powers.”

_“What?”_

He continued to ignore me.

_Who is he talking about? It’s definitely not_ me.

“Your tongue may be silken,” Garland said accusingly, “but your fist chooses war. You are as much a slave to bloodshed as I.”

“Well, that’s not true,” I found myself saying _to myself_ out loud. Everyone has flaws, but he’d offered to stay his hand to travel with Vaan and the others. That was the _opposite_ of violent, if you ask me.

_But he still fought them anyway._

_But for good reason. They refused to see something was wrong with Mog._

_What am I supposed to do?_

“I dirty my hands to fulfill my duties,” Vayne countered, shaking his head. His voice took on a more hostile tone. “Do _not_ confuse me with a bloodthirsty warrior like yourself.”

My anxiety had skyrocketed. They weren’t going to fight… were they?

“There is strength to be gained in being true to oneself,” Garland told him. Neither of us bought it. Vayne turned away.

“A weak excuse,” he said. He began to walk away. I was stuck in place, unmoving. His head twitched toward me. “Are you coming?”

I found myself following him anyway. Garland watched us until we were no longer in sight. Once I was sure no one was around…

“Wait…” I swallowed. “You’re not… _actually_ going to destroy this world… right?”

“Would you not find it reasonable?” he asked.

_“Reasonable? Destroying a **world?**_ You want me to think that’s _reasonable?”_

“There is nothing here, nothing to preserve-.”

“I’ll give you that, but-”

“But nothing. Whatever is causing the rifts must be destroyed, the world along with it, if that is it takes.”

“But- But- What about the other people here? They’re from different worlds, worlds that _need_ them. What will happen to _them?”_

“It matters not.”

_“‘It matters not’?!”_

Vayne paused to observe me. I must have looked very, very worried and stricken. His own eyes did not hold concern or annoyance, however. No. They held _curiosity._

“Do you even _hear_ yourself?! How would you feel if the roles were switched? If they threatened to destroy this world and possibly _you_ along with it? Doesn’t your world _need_ you or something?”

“Were our positions reversed, I would _understand.”_

I let out a breath of disbelief. Then I shook my head.

“That’s _insane,”_ I breathed. “That’s- I don’t even know.”

“Then what would you propose?” Vayne argued. “That we _let_ the beast consume everything?”

“Of _course_ not. But- I can’t even _comprehend_ why that’s your _first_ choice of action.”

“Again, what would _you_ propose?”

“I don’t know- Something a little less black and white? Why don’t we _talk_ to everyone first and use destroying this place as a _last resort?”_

Something flashed through his eyes and his composure almost broke. It wasn’t anger, though. I didn’t know _what_ it was.

“You don’t understand,” he said. I didn’t like the belittling tone in his voice. “I’d hardly expect a _common_ woman to know what would be best for her country.”

“Oh and _you_ do?”

_Shut. Up. You’re making him mad and you don’t even know what you’re talking about._

_Where is his hostility coming from?_

_I thought the people in his world **chose** their leaders? Wouldn’t that mean they at least know **something** about what might be best?_

So I made the mistake of asking him.

_“Do not_ bring Archadia into this,” he hissed, stepping up and almost closing the distance between us. It was an effective intimidation move. He _towered_ over me. “You know _nothing_ of my world, of my _nation._ What I do, I do for _them._ ...No, I do it for _all_ of Ivalice.”

I couldn’t argue with that. And I _did_ admire his drive, his _passion._ But I had to push it aside. It somehow _hurt_ to think about.

_Why does this make me sad?_

“Well?”

My stricken expression fell to one of hopelessness. My eyes were devoid of any emotion but a sad understanding. Yes, I knew why he did it, that much was extremely clear. But still...

“Nothing, then. No smart remarks?”

“At least you _have_ somewhere to protect,” I said quietly. It surprised me. Eos was still new to me and as far as I knew, Noctis wasn’t here. So why would I talk of Earth like it no longer existed?

That one statement left us both in silence. All feeling had left me. I stared at him as his searched my eyes for something. One moment passed. Then another.

“...You truly _do_ not understand, then,” he said softly. “Whatever memories you are missing come forth in the worst of situations.”

I finally lowered my gaze.

“I don’t even know what I meant by that,” I whispered. I was scared. I was _terrified._ What did he mean my memories were coming forth? I couldn’t remember _anything_ that had happened after Cape Caem.

“Whenever I look at you and our eyes meet, your subconscious _screams_ at me that something is very, very _wrong.”_

“Is that why you keep me around?”

“...In part, yes.”

“What’re the other parts?”

“Something I once told your brother. And I will reluctantly admit that up until this point, you’ve had a slight charm to you.”

“So Garland was right. We like each other. We’re friends.”

“That is one way of interpreting it, yes. You remind me… well, it doesn’t matter, does it…?”

I allowed myself to glance up questioningly.

“I presume this is where we part ways?”

My heart dropped. He was leaving me? _Alone?_

“Oh,” I murmured. “If… ...If that’s what you want…”

His eyebrows furrowed. “I’d assume it is what _you_ want.”

“Why would I want to leave you? You’re my friend.”

A sigh left him. “You continue to make absolutely no sense to me.”

I grinned. “I am under no obligation to make sense to you.”

One second passed… Five seconds passed… Ten seconds passed…

Vayne laughed. No chuckle, no slight smile. He really _laughed._

“Well, then,” he said, shaking his head. “Despite our differences, you would remain with me. Your loyalty is… astounding, I must admit.”

I shrugged. My grin had stretched into a real smile. “I try.”

“Come, then. We have a crystal to find.”

No words can describe the relief I felt. Wandering the space between shelves upon _shelves_ of machine parts side by side reassured me everything was fine now. Well, not exactly, but our conflict had been resolved. A weight on my chest lifted.

“I should probably apologize for shouting at you,” I said, awkwardly and shyly tilting my head.

“There is no need,” Vayne told me. “Your concern for others is moving.”

“You… You don’t think it’s…”

I licked my lips thoughtfully.

“I don’t know, weak or something…?”

“A soft heart in a cruel world is strength, not weakness, yes?”

I blinked in surprise.

_Where did he hear that?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It isn’t _too_ often a game leaves me speechless for a moment and unable to continue for a minute, but when I was playing through the Interlude, that cutscene with Vayne and Cait Sith came up. I just sat there for a good while when Vayne said “A man is human by the societies he builds” because I’ve never thought of it that way before. It really struck deep and I will never forget it.
> 
> ALSO - Garland saying “you are intimate with a warrior of Materia” actually HAPPENED and I _DIED_.
> 
> I swear Noct is coming. You’ll get a glimpse eventually I swEAR-


	45. Faber est suae quisque fortunae

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Si vis pacem, para bellum...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! *waves*
> 
> Title: “Every man is the artisan of his own fortune”
> 
> Also warning: minor Lord of the Rings spoilers

Getting to the crystal core was a real hassle. Sure, it hadn’t been _that_ long since the confrontation between me and Vayne. But… Whatever fortress we were in was a maze. Everything looked the same and not once we did we pass anything or anyone that could be used as a landmark. We didn’t even see _Garland_ again.

“I wish our quest,” I muttered quietly to myself, “was to travel across the world to deliver a ring to a darkened land and destroy it in a volcano.”

Vayne chuckled next to me. “You _would_ make a suitable Samwise.”

It was my turn to suddenly stop. I stared at him with wide eyes.

“You…” I scrambled for a way to voice my ever rising excitement. An idiotic grin forced its way to face. “You know- You have- I…”

_Think, think!!!_

“Middle-earth???”

_Idiot._

_“The Lord of the Rings_ does exist on Ivalice, yes,” Vayne said, chuckling. “And on…? Forgive me.”

“Earth,” I said, bouncing slightly. “I’m from Earth. It’s not the most creative name, but I love it. And Lord of the Rings is, like, one of my special interests!”

_I think I’m officially in love._

_Oh, **come** on!_

“Special interest…?” he trailed. I nodded earnestly.

“It means I really, really, really, really, _**really**_ like something. Like a hyperfocus. It’s an autism thing.”

The image of Vayne in that small forest by the field of flowers came into my thoughts. Now that I thought about it: was that what Beren was like when he met Luthien? Utterly enchanted? Vayne was certainly handsome enough to be an elf.

“Your passion is just as moving as your loyalty,” he said with a small smile. Oh. Oh no. He was _smiling._ I was _ruined._

We continued walking as my excited, fangirl brain bombarded him with questions.

“So Tolkien exists in your world?” I asked frantically. “What do you think it? Do you have a favorite character? I actually have a plushie of Gandalf back home.”

“Hmm…” Vayne thought it over. “I’ve always been partial to Boromir. I relate to him in many senses.”

“Oh _yeah!_ Boromir’s such an underrated character. It’s a shame he’s usually remembered for just succumbing to the Ring’s temptation, I mean, even _Aragorn’s ancestors_ did. He’s so much more than that.”

“It is a great relief to hear someone shares that same sentiment.”

“He was a man who wanted to protect his country and he was willing to do anything for it. And he was damn proud of it, too. And I love how he cared for the hobbits, especially Merry and Pippin. I took a class on Lord of the Rings last semester and we went over Boromir and his character and the significance of his death. How it made up for trying to take the Ring from Frodo. It’s tragic, but he was still a good man in the end.

“Sorry for small paragraph. I don’t really have anyone else to talk to about this seeing as no one I know has ever actually read the books.”

“Really? They’re magnificently written.”

“I know, right?! I was maybe twelve when I first got into and even though she didn’t read the books, I got my friend to watch the movies. I mean, the movies have to cut a lot out to save time but they’re still pretty good. We went as Merry and Pippin for Halloween that year.”

“Halloween?”

“All Hallow’s Eve. It’s this- well, I’ll call it a tradition. It’s a holiday we celebrate, though its history is slightly more sinister. It’s supposedly the time of year when the veil between worlds is thinnest and monsters and ghosts and all manner of scary and evil things come out to cause mischief and whatnot. Back in the day, people - mainly children - would dress up as these monsters to sort of blend in so they wouldn’t become victims. Nowadays, it’s just a time for dressing up in costumes and going Trick or Treating. That’s when kids go around neighbors knocking on people’s doors and saying ‘trick or treat’ and they receive candy.”

“That is… quite the tradition, I must say.”

I beamed at him. “It’s fun. Although…”

I looked away.

“...it gets less exciting the older you are. Like I said, it’s mainly for kids. Or maybe that’s just the depression talking.”

“Growing up has its consequences. Sometimes things we once enjoyed no longer give us that same spark of excitement.”

“True. But… there’s only one holiday I can think of that never gets old. It’s practically its own state of mind. We call it Christmas.”

She needed this, he told himself. After her breakdown in the Labyrinth and their argument, she needed to be happy. Something was wrong and even though she couldn’t remember what it was, he wouldn’t let it get to her.

After all, Vayne had told her brother that he could leave her in his care while he was gone.

However… The tales she spun of the birth of the son of God and a saint named Nicholas did seem rather farfetched. Vayne supposed it was a cultural difference. Yet… When she looked up at him to make sure he was following along, the sparkling in her eyes told him this was a tradition she held dear.

“But most importantly,” she finally got the general point, “Christmas is a time of giving and being with family. We put gifts under a decorated tree and on Christmas morning we open them. My own family lets me open one gift on Christmas Eve. I’ve been doing that since I was little.”

“A wonderful time of year,” Vayne said, “from your descriptions and passion alone.”

“Correction: it’s the _most_ wonderful time of the year. Christmas songs are pretty much their own genre and that is the name of one of the songs.”

Stars above, they had _songs_ for this?

“During World War One, actually, one Christmas they stopped fighting and just celebrated. Being so far from home must’ve been hard…”

“World War… One?”

“Don’t get me started on that. Let’s just say: it was meant to be the ‘war to end all wars’ but then we had a second one that was a lot worse.”

He needed to find the time to ask her more about this. Her homeworld was positively fascinating.

“How did we go from talking about Lord of the Rings to World War One?”

Vayne chuckled. “Well, when the conversation is this riveting, one tends to get carried away.”

“Huh. I guess so. I’m not… boring you?”

“Of course not.” He glanced at her curiously. She seemed sheepish, hesitant. Was she not used to being heard for such a long time? “If it distracts you from your emotions, then by all means, chatter away. But I do find - ah… Earth, was it? - to be a source of interest.”

That made her unbelievably happy. That smile as she thanked him…

Vayne swallowed and managed to keep his composure.

 

“So,” Vayne said. We had reached the end of the fortress of machinery, “the center of the world lies just ahead.”

“I still think we should wait a bit,” I muttered bitterly. “Find a gray area in the middle?”

“In the matter of life or death, I will choose life. Though it be not for me, or anyone else here, at the very least the people of Ivalice will live on.”

“Your heart’s in the right place, I’ll give you that.”

As we talked, footsteps approached. Several someones rapidly ran toward us. Vayne and I situated ourselves to face them. Vaan, Cloud, Warrior, and Cait Sith hurried to either meet or attack us.

“You were waiting to ambush us!” Vaan accused. My eyes widened and I looked at Vayne.

“We were?” I asked. A Torsion opened and out came Garland. “Oh, _fantastic…”_

“You knew it would come to this,” he said to the others. A slight pause occurred before Vayne spoke.

“Indeed,” he said. “I never expected the road to open without some dirt on my hands.”

I sighed, frustrated, and crossed my arms at his stubbornness.

“I dinnae like the sound of that,” Cait Sith said. “Just what are you planning to do?”

“You came here to protect the crystal core and the world. I have no such desire.”

“Why does he know about the core?!” Vaan demanded, looking at Cait. “What did you tell him?!”

“Calm down,” Cloud told him. “Cait Sith gave us information on him, too.”

“That arrangement ends here,” Vayne said.

“You got that right!” Cait Sith agreed. I sighed again.

“Cait Sith,” Cloud said, “tell us later about everything you learned from this guy.”

“Will you continue to fight for us?” Warrior asked.

“Certainly!” Cait Sith said. “I dinnae particularly care for reckless measures like destroying worlds.”

I elbowed Vayne. Hard. He sent me an annoyed glare.

“Yes, yes, I’ve heard,” he said. “But I would say it is reasonable.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Vaan cut in. “Why do you want to destroy this world anyway?!”

“His heart’s in the right place,” I muttered. “I just wish he would _listen.”_

“So you’re telling me he won’t even listen to _you?”_

“This is where the planesgorger has made its base,” Vayne explained coolly.

_There’s that word again. Planesgorger. What does that even mean?_

“With a path to every world, it is the perfect feeding ground. Think rationally if you wish to save Ivalice.”

“What will happen to us and the gods if this world is destroyed?” Warrior asked.

“That is none of my concern.”

“Well, it should be,” I countered quietly.

“This man does not care if the warriors who walk this earth-” Garland said.

A pang of emotional pain shot through my heart.

“-are annihilated along with the world’s destruction.”

“A small price to pay,” Vayne reasoned, “for the people of Archadia- nay, the peoples of Ivalice.”

Pause. Then Cloud spoke up.

“That’s your idea of ‘reasonable’?” he said. “Putting a price on the heads of others?”

He jumped into a fighting stance. His friends joined him. I stepped back.

“You’ll save nothing that way!” Warrior declared. “These warriors have people waiting for them to come home, too!”

“_______,” Vaan looked at me, “don’t tell me you actually _agree_ with him?”

“I tried to talk some sense into him,” I said nervously. “It ended rather depressingly…”

“And yet you’re _still_ blindly following him!”

I opened my mouth but he cut me off.

“Don’t you have your own home to go back to?!”

Utter silence. Everyone was staring at me, waiting. My gaze dropped to the floor.

“Not exactly,” I said simply. “I was on Eos for maybe a month and that’s it. And Noctis isn’t here, so I don’t even know if this place is tied to there.”

“So you’d rather us feel your pain instead of helping us to prevent the same thing happening to us?” Cloud said.

“No, that’s not what I said. I see pros and cons on both sides. So, that is _why-”_

I glared at Vayne.

“-I thought we should talk it out and _then_ use destruction as a final resort.”

“There is no time for debate,” Vayne countered. “Any time lost is more time for the planesgorger to grow stronger.”

“You’re just not going to listen,” Vaan stated, angry yet slightly drained. He and his friends resumed their fighting poses.

“Hmph,” Garland finally spoke up. “At last the sword is drawn.”

“Let’s say I don’t like your way of doing things either,” Cloud said.

“There may…” Warrior said, _“must_ be a way to protect both those here and the people in worlds we came from. I refuse to give up no matter how small the spark of hope may be!”

“So that’s how your light shines, I see,” Garland said. “At last, a warrior worthy of my blade. Vayne, ______, we fight together.”

“If we must,” Vayne said resignedly.

“I’m not fighting,” I clarified. “But I _will_ heal whoever I must.”

“How can you stand there and just _watch?”_ Vaan shouted.

“We’re past the point of talking,” Warrior said. “Focus!”

The whole time they fought, I stood there. I was worried for Vayne, but nothing else filled my heart. I was otherwise empty. Why?

_Why do I feel like… Why am I treating home like its gone? Did I learn I can’t go back?_

_That must be it._

_You don’t have anything to fight for anymore._

_You’re all alone._

_You have **no one.**_

Noctis. I had Noctis. And even if I died, he wasn’t here. He was still on Eos, living and breathing with his friends. They still had a chance of taking their own homes back. They wouldn’t miss me for long.

_But the others… What about their homes?_

_You can’t be selfish._

_How is this being selfish?_

_What am I supposed to do?_

_What would Noctis do?_

_...What **would** Noctis do…?_

“Stop,” I croaked, drawing Ithilcalad. No one heard me. “Stop!”

They continued to clash. Garland assaulted Warrior with power strokes of his blade. Cloud fought him back with a loud clash. Cait Sith supported the party, helping where he could as Vaan, filled with rage, attacked Vayne.

_Where do I go in?_

Cloud left Garland to Warrior. The slashes of his own sword had Vayne jumping to dodge them. Cait Sith was a friend of Cloud’s, so he teamed up with him.

_No. Vayne’s been nice to me. So have the others, but for some reason I trust him more. He’s stable, consistent. Sure of himself. Everything that I’m… not._

I darted forward and intercepted Vaan’s sword with my own.

“I can’t believe you,” he hissed. “I thought you’d see reason more than him.”

I ignored Vaan and pushed him back. Then, I brought my hands in.

_F W I P_

Everyone halted as a foot and a half of snow _whapped_ right onto them.

“I will take it!” I shouted as their conflict ended. “I will take the Ring to Mordor!”

“What are you _doing?”_ Vayne asked. He readied himself to fight again. I marched right up to him, Ithilcalad pointing at his chest.

_“Stop,”_ I said sternly. “And _listen.”_

He dropped his hands after a long moment’s pause.

“What is the meaning of this?” Garland gnarled. “You said you wouldn’t fight and yet you interfere-!”

“Shut the _fuck_ up,” I demanded. I shot my glare to Vaan, pointing my sword at him, too. “You, too.”

“What’re you doing?” Cloud asked somewhat calmly.

“Wha- _honestly._ What part of ‘shut up’ don’t you understand? Ugh…”

I dropped my sword and let it dissipate.

_“Look._ Go to Materia and go to Spiritus and demand you go home. Let _me_ destroy the world.”

“What?” Warrior asked. “You can’t possibly-”

“Oh I can.”

I swallowed a growing lump in my throat and spoke with a tight voice as I tried not to cry at my admittance.

“I have nothing left. Noctis isn’t here and neither are our friends. If they have a shot at helping their world and claiming their home back, then I want them to _take it._ And I want you to take yours, too. So let me destroy this one while you go back to your homes.”

No one spoke for a long while. Finally, someone crunched through the snow behind me. A hand rested on my shoulder. Vayne’s voice sliced the silence in half.

“You would really do that for all of us?” he asked solemnly. I nodded.

“No way I’m letting you do that,” Vaan piped up. I sent him another glare.

“Just because you don’t like him doesn’t mean you always have to take the opposite side,” I lectured. “And I’ll do it if you can work together for once and get _home.”_

“Just because you don’t have a home doesn’t mean you sacrifice yourself,” Cloud said. “Isn’t Noctis waiting for you?”

“He’ll live. That’s what matters.”

Why did it hurt to say that?

“I won’t allow it,” Warrior declared. “No one should have to die for this. I won’t let it happen.”

I said nothing, not knowing _what_ to say.

“If that is it,” Garland said, “then let us resume the battle!”

“No,” I pleased. _“Please_ stop fighting.”

My words fell on deaf ears. The battle completed itself in record time with me standing devoid of emotion in the center.

_Why do they never listen?_

 

“Don’t say it.”

“I _told_ you.”

Vayne groaned and reluctantly allowed me to heal him. No panic attack this time. Good. But it did hurt.

“And did you listen? No. Why does no one ever _listen_ to me…?”

“Your offer was tempting,” Vayne said, standing at full height now. “And it touched everyone in the room, I believe. What would make you come to such a decision?”

I absent-mindedly reached out and took one of his gloved hands and examined it as I thought.

“It was the only way to save everyone,” I said quietly. “And I meant what I said. I have nothing, and I want Noct to save his own world. I love him and his friends. Ignis, Gladio, Prompto… But we’ve only known each other for about a month. I doubt they’ll miss me for long.”

_I turned the object in my hands over and continued to examine it._

“With the way you and Noctis bicker,” Vayne said, “I’d say he would miss you for a lot longer.”

I shrugged. What was I looking at, again?

“Oh!” I dropped his hand. “Sorry… I don’t- I don’t have an excuse…”

“You don’t like conflict, do you?”

I glanced up at Vayne. “Not really, no. Why?”

“That’s twice now you’ve thrown yourself in front of me to fight that urchin.”

I blinked, confused. “Um… We’re… nowhere near the ocean…?”

He chuckled. “The boy. What was his name…?”

“Vaan?”

“Yes, that was it. But as I said, you not only defended me, but stopped everyone from fighting by making it snow.”

“It’s not the first time I’ve made the stupid decision to defend a friend against a strong enemy.”

“Really?”

I nodded. “The empire stole our car and we finally located it at a base. During the night, we snuck in to take it back, but then we were attacked. Ramuh came in and obliterated all the MTs. When we got back to the car, Ravus, the high commander and the Oracle’s _brother,_ came out to challenge Noctis. He kinda… blamed him for the stuff happening to his sister.

“Then, Gladio, who is Noctis’ shield, stepped up to defend him but he got thrown back and almost totaled our newly retrieved car. So instead of staying quiet like a good, combat-inexperienced bean, I put myself in front of Noctis. Someone came in to stop Ravus, but… they still got mad.”

“I don’t blame them,” Vayne said. “You’re rather self-destructive, I gather. No wonder he worries so.”

I grinned sheepishly. “That was a bad day in general.”

“Ah, consul, there you are,” a familiar voice said, interrupting our discussion. Ultimecia and three others walked in our direction.

“So the little magey’s here as well!” a floating clown guy said in a _really_ obnoxious voice. I tugged on Vayne’s sleeve.

“Who is that and what did he call me?” I whispered.

“Come,” said a nearly naked woman with two yellow snakes coming from her back. “The crystal core is near.”

Blue Armor laughed ominously. “Devourer… Open the Rift that all may return to the Void.”

A Torsion opened.

“Hiding something so delicious from us,” Clown Guy said, “Ooooh, what naughty gods!”

I decided quickly that I didn’t like him.

“Where the balance is disrupted,” Snake Lady said cryptically, “that is where we exist.”

_Hi yes what the actual fuck does that mean?_

“Time… Space…” Ultimecia said. “Compress it all and deliver it to me!”

They walked through the Torsion. I stared after them in horror.

“How can they just let it happen?” I whispered in shock. Vayne shook his head, also appalled.

“Monsters…!” he hissed.

“You think you are any different?” an accented voice said. Spiritus stood behind us.

_Oh dear. This isn’t good..._

“I answer to no god,” Vayne said, lifting his chin up. “I am ruled by no one.”

“Then show me as you go against the order of this world.”

“Spiritus, why do you stand by as they destroy your creation? If you had a duty to protect your world, you would not have summoned those with minds of destruction.”

“This is not ‘my world’.”

_...What?_

“Mine is another world, one of unending strife. That is what maintains my world. This world was to be a place of respite for those warriors. Or so it was made to appear…”

Spiritus closed his eyes.

“If those warriors wish to continue their battles here, so be it.”

“Another world?” Vayne repeated. “Made to appear?”

“You have _got_ to be _kidding_ me,” I growled. “You couldn’t have told us this _beforehand?!”_

“But would you have fought as hard?” Spiritus asked me. I huffed.

“I fight for the people I care about, and sure as hell not _you.”_

“If this world is not your own,” Vayne started, “why defend it?”

“Yeah,” I added, “why not just destroy it and then recreate it. Why do you need _us?”_

“Mine is a parallel world,” Spiritus explained, “in which warriors fight endlessly of their own volition. This world is merely its counterbalance.”

“...Preposterous!” Vayne seethed. “I have a _home_ to return to! As does the urchin and all the others! Who do you think are?!”

“What will you do?” Spiritus asked, almost mockingly.

“I will destroy this world. And then I will destroy everything. I will take back my life with my own hands.”

Vayne looked at me.

“Come. We have a planet to destroy.”

He began to walk away. I looked from him to Spiritus and then back again.

“You cry for justice,” Spiritus said after Vayne, “and in the end follow the order of this world. Fight, my warriors! And feed my world!”

I glared at Spiritus before rushing off after Vayne.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually did take that class on LOTR. Best class I’ve ever had 😊
> 
> and ye i still headcanon that it exists in Ivalice. For some reason it makes sense to me.
> 
> Aaannyway..... This has been your weekly fill! I’ll see about getting that Noctis POV...


	46. Meminerunt omnia amantes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader’s odd day gets worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yoooooooo
> 
> Title: “Love remembers all”

Inside the Torsion, Vayne and I met the harbingers of destruction. With no other choice, we followed them. The portal opened up into a bright, light blue room. Tiles and pillars of the same color made up the decor. And there, in the center… The crystal core was right there. A large, golden snake had wrapped itself around it. Something was pulsing under.

_It’s… absorbing the crystal’s power…!_

As I watched the golden serpent, Materia’s warriors and Spiritus’ argued about whatever the planesgorger was.

“This one is but an infant,” Ultimecia said. “Planesgorgers devour everything… They devour light and power, and once full, they await to hatch.”

“An infant, kupo?!” Mog was here, too. “How did that make its way in here?!”

“The new larvae gathered using the power of the Blackened Will as a guide…”

“The planesgorgers,” Blue Armor said, “wish to grow and devour the world! And give birth to nothingness!”

“Kupo…” Mog looked down guiltily. “This is all my fault, kupo…”

“Don’t say that!” Vaan said quickly. “Let’s just focus on defeating that thing, ‘kay?”

“Booooring!” Clown Guy cut in. “This crystal is on a one-way trip to roughed up one side and back down the other! Oh, in case you didn’t know, the Blackened Will was also an itty-bitty teensy-weensy part of a planesgorger!”

“It used the moogle to consume the energy it needed to mature!” Blue Armor said. “There must have been a problem with the host. That it would hatch in that form was unexpected.”

“A planegorger was in me, kupo?” Mog said, shocked.

“But thanks to you, moogle, its larvae made its way to this world. I applaud you.”

_How do we get rid of it…?_

_There probably isn’t a simple way to do it. And if everyone starts fighting, it will feed off that energy as well as the crystal’s._

_They’re going to fight. And I can’t stop this one._

“We can resolve this from our respective worlds,” Vayne said next to me. I payed attention once more.

“Who asked you?!” Vaan shouted back.

“I have no desire to be a tool for these gods. Once the crystal is destroyed, we will be free.”

“Hold!” Cecil said. “The crystal won’t last much longer!”

_I have to do **something.**_

“We can make a break for it!” Firion said.

“Stay outta our way!” Vaan demanded.

When Vayne rushed forward to stop them, my heart and body jumped into action. But I didn’t go for Vaan or anyone else.

I went for the crystal.

“No!”

“Don’t do it!”

I sprinted up the steps and summoned Ithilcalad. With a stroke Gladio would’ve been proud of, I struck the stone. It shattered into a million, sparkling pieces. A rush of energy washed through my entire being as my body lit up with light and then calmed. The planesgorger larvae shrieked. I stared up at it. I couldn’t move. My legs wouldn’t work. I was petrified.

With a thud, I was launched down the stairs by the tail of the snake and hit the ground. My glasses flew off my face upon impact. I landed on the shards of the crystal, whimpering in pain. Footsteps hurried over to where I was lying. I heard a shuffle of fabric as someone knelt down next to me.

“______…” I heard Vayne mutter. A hand tried to turn me over. “Self-destructive, indeed.”

“Is she okay?”

“She’ll be fine.”

_It hurts. Everything hurts. Why do I do this to myself?_

“The crystal…!” Someone exclaimed.

“No…” Someone else said. “What’ll happen to this world now?”

I didn’t even try to get up. My eyes remained closed and the exhaustion from the day’s events caught up to me. I drifted into an uneasy sleep.

Something… strange was going on inside my mind. I ignored the hostile conversation going on outside my dreams and focused. A shimmering light appeared in the darkness of my thoughts. It wasn’t everything, but memories burst forth, flooding back into my mind.

 

_“Uhhh… Noct?”_

_“Where the hell are we?”_

_“Nevermind.”_

 

_“I beseech you, both of you, defeat Spiritus. That will be all.”_

 

_“Cecil. Nice to meet you.”_

 

_“Ever have someone you didn’t understand…” Cecil started to say._

_“Hmm?” That was Noctis._

_“And yet you find that what is important to them… suddenly becomes important to you?”_

_My own voice piped up. “Yeah! That’s how I feel with Noct! And his friends, of course.”_

 

_Are we… really just doing as a random goddess asked? No, **demanded?**_

 

_“Vayne Solidor. And I believe your name is ______, yes?”_

 

_“Well… As dramatic as that is,” I said, “there’s nothing I can find to counter that, I guess. I’ve never destroyed a world before, so… Sounds fun in theory. I’d join you if I could.”_

 

_“We’ve seen this destroyer of dimensions before.” That’s Cecil. “And it went by many a sonorous name.”_

 

_“Do the goddess’ blind faithful come to do her bidding?”_

 

_“Not now, Iris,” I muttered._

_“Um, my name is Terra…”_

 

_She smiled and introduced herself as Y’shtola._

 

_“Pray tell, for what purpose do you fight - or would you fight - were you back home?”_

_“I just want to help them as best I can. And it isn’t much I can do, but…”_

_That’s me..._

_“They’re like family to me now.”_

 

_“A soul of kindness,” Vayne said slowly, “of such compassion… has hardly any place in such ruthless worlds.”_

_“A soft heart in a cruel world is strength, not weakness.”_

 

_“Are you sure? If you carry it around with you, isn’t it important to you?”_

_“I’d rather you have it.”_

 

_“I wish… I had something to give you… To… remember me…”_

 

I jerked awake. A dark blue sky met my eyes. Thin clouds had been dashed here and there. Stars twinkled, a cosmic array of stardust and nebulae painting the black expanse above. I groaned, trying to sit up. Pain rippled through my back and I lied back down.

“Don’t move. Your reckless actions have rendered you immobile for the time being.”

I tilted my head back. Vayne Solidor stood over me. His towering height would have had me shrinking back if I hadn’t been lying on the ground.

“Hey,” I said with a pained grin. “Good to see you again.”

His eyebrows lifted.

“You have your memories back…?” he asked. I made a so-so movement with my hand.

“Not everything, but I definitely remember this… ah, where are we?”

“The dark world. It would seem there is one more core, the dark core, to destroy.”

“Greeeaaat… Can I please get up? It hurts down here…”

He walked around to my other side and held out a hand. I took it with my own, arm aching. _Everything_ ached as he lifted me onto my feet. I wobbled and he helped to stabilize me.

“Careful, now,” he muttered. “I’m surprised that snake didn’t kill you.”

“I think I took the crystal’s power.”

“You did, that’s why it was so enraged.”

“But really, it’s good to see you again. You look great. I mean, you always look great - not that you don’t look- I mean- You’re just…”

Heat was creeping up my cheeks to my ears.

“I mean, you’re, uh, really hands- ugh…”

I buried my face in my hands. A small laugh met my ears.

“Good to see you haven’t changed a bit,” Vayne said. He brought my hands down. “And it is wonderful to see you, as well.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Would you have preferred I did?”

I thought it over.

“Actually, it probably would have confused me more,” I admitted. “Thanks for taking me along. Um, will you tell me why, now?”

“You do remember I gave your brother my word to leave you in my care?” Vayne said. I blinked.

“That… extends this far?”

He nodded. The heat in my cheeks increased. I probably looked like a cherry.

“Well, thank you. Glad we got to destroying that world like we said we would.”

Another chuckle lit the air.

“Yet you argued with me,” he said, amused. I burrowed into my hoodie, hair hiding my face.

“Sorry,” I said in a small voice.

“Don’t be. You stood up against what you believed to be wrong. It is good you don’t blindly follow someone without question.”

I shrugged. “But I still stayed with you.”

“And I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

My eyes widened. Another smile stretched slowly across my face.

“I missed you,” I found myself saying, fiddling with the rook in my pocket. Vayne blinked.

“Did you?” he said in a slightly teasing voice.

I hid in my hair again. “Yes.”

A hand slipped under my hair and pushed it back.

“There’s no reason to be ashamed,” he said.

“Not ashamed. Embarrassed.”

“No need for that, either.”

I glanced up at him shyly and then around at where we were. We stood in what seemed to be a middle ground between a moor and the highlands. Bushes sprouted up around the long faded pathway. The sky above was a dark blue like dawn had just broken. No animals scurried about. All was quiet.

“Are we… in Scotland or something?” I muttered. “Where are the sheep?”

Another slight laugh broke through the air.

“Witty as ever,” Vayne said. “Materia’s warriors are a ways ahead. They seek what they call ‘brilliance’ to regain their memories.”

“So… I just need to get my hands on some of that?” I asked. He nodded. I sighed. “Okay. I didn’t expect it to be easy.”

“Nothing ever is, is it? Everything is easier said than done.”

“Except for silence, which is easier done than said.”

I grinned up at his surprised but impressed expression. He shook his head.

“Come,” he said. “There’s a city up ahead.”

I looked in the same direction he was looking. A glittering city as grand as New York stretched up high in the distance. Skyscrapers towered over silver streets. Nothing moved among the buildings. Like the moor, it was empty. A ghost city.

“Man,” I muttered as I followed him over the hills, “I missed New York, but seeing it so empty is… This is like some post-apocalyptic setting and it’s throwing me off.”

“Hmm, it is, isn’t it?” Vayne said. “I assume this ‘New York’ looks like our destination?”

“Yep. It’s one of the biggest cities where I’m from, and known worldwide. The Statue of Liberty is there.”

“And what would that be?”

“A huuuge statue made of copper of a woman holding a torch and… a tablet, I think. It was a gift from France, who helped us in the Revolutionary War.”

“So your country is the product of a resistance?”

“Yep.”

“Interesting… You received outside help to win?”

“Yep.”

“Are you capable of saying anything other than that?”

“...Yep.”

He sighed. “Tell me more about this revolution.”

So I did. I told Vayne, the son of an emperor, the basics of how my own country broke free from the British Empire. I couldn’t tell him everything, seeing as my knowledge was limited, but it was enough to satisfy him and fill the silence for a good portion of the trip as his questions continued. I wondered when I’d get to ask him about his own world.

“If you weren’t so vibrant in your summary, I’d think you were telling me a joke.”

“Whaaat? How is this a joke?”

“There is no way thirteen _colonies_ could beat an empire, even with outside help. Not if you were an ocean away _and_ against the best naval forces.”

“Welcome to Earth. We have nothing if not determination and a strong will to piss everybody off. Or maybe that’s just America. I dunno.”

“And how exactly did the government work _after_ the war? I’d expect it to collapse.”

“It almost did. Before we had the Bill of Rights and the current Constitution, there was another thing - I can’t remember its name - but it didn’t work so they reformed it and that is what we now have: a system of checks and balances with three branches.”

“For someone who claims to dislike political matters, you certainly know an awful lot about them.”

“Eh, I had to learn this almost every year in school before high school.”

I glanced up at the sky.

“Or maybe I just don’t like corruption.”

When my gaze rested on Vayne once again, I noticed his usual cold eyes had reverted to something… not warmer, but they were different somehow. Truly calmer.

_I can’t I believe couldn’t remember him._

I didn’t realize we had come to a stop. Our eyes were still locked together. His were so green. It wasn’t a dark green, though. It was a light, pale green whose color you wouldn’t be able to determine unless you were close. The same shade as…

“Is something the matter...?”

I jerked out of my lovestruck trance. I shook myself before looking down at the bracelet on my hand.

_Where did I get this…?_

It was silver wire wrapped around pieces of seaglass. Some of the glass… was the same color as Vayne’s eyes.

_Oh no. I’m gone already._

“______…?”

I jumped. “Sorry… Just trying to figure out what I’m missing…”

He nodded in understanding. “You said not all of your memories returned?”

I nodded.

“Hmm…”

He turned toward the city I had dubbed New New York.

“Perhaps we can find answers down there.”

 

_Man, why couldn’t this world conjure up some benches? My feet **hurt** like hell._

Vayne and I had finally made it to New New York. Varying shades of gray stone made up most of everything in sight. It wasn’t as bright as the machinery fortress, but it wasn’t pretty to look at for long. The buildings were even taller than they looked from far away. The streets weren’t designed for cars. It was like an eternal stone sidewalk that never ended.

“Should we look inside the buildings?” I asked. “Maybe we’ll find stuff like in that castle.”

“We should keep moving,” Vayne said. “We have much ground to cover.”

I sighed helplessly and slightly drooped over myself.

“Come now, we haven’t been here for long.”

“Yeah, but _you_ didn’t get launched across a room.”

“A fair point.”

He stopped and analyzed the various structures around us. The large, wide building to our right must have suited him because he beckoned me to follow him. Writing had been etched into the stone above the entrance, but it wasn’t anything I could read. I trailed Vayne inside. Stairs led us down two flights to an open area. At the far end of the room was another staircase that mirrored where we were. Along the walls were various out-of-service terminals. In the center of the room was a round information booth with a clock resting on top.

We came to a stop at the bottom of the stairs. This room screamed familiarity at me. I knew it. I had been here once before, but it wasn’t gray, it was golden.

“I think this is Grand Central Station,” I said, still looking around. “But it's all silver instead of gold.”

“A train station?” Vayne asked. I nodded. “Very impressive.”

I glanced up at the ceiling. Instead of the blue it should have been, it was a very light gray with the images painted on it in a darker gray.

“Oh hey!” I said, happy to recognize something else. “Those are the Zodiac signs!”

Vayne looked up with me.

“Zodiac signs…?” he said quietly. “So those exist elsewhere?”

“You have some, too?”

“Yes, there are twelve.”

“Hey, same here! Let’s see…”

I pointed at the image of a bull and then to one of a ram.

“That’s Taurus, my sign. And that’s Aries. Probably Gladio’s.”

I glanced over the others.

“Not all of these are Zodiac… But I see Pisces, as well. And that guy with the spear is Orion! Three stars make up his belt, so he’s easy to spot at night.”

“...Your signs are… the same as ours.”

I blinked in surprise. “Really?”

Vayne nodded. “How strange… I almost wonder if it means something.”

I gasped with epiphany and gave Vayne a very excited look.

“What if our planets are close to each other?!” I gushed. “Well, I mean, not _too_ close or we’d have gotten signals from each other already, BUT: what if they’re in the same galaxy, at least? That would be _so cool!”_

“It… is a tad far fetched…” Vayne said slowly, dampening my spirits. “But I cannot say for certain whether or not it has true merit.”

“I’ll take what I can get. _Galaxy buddy.”_

“Don’t… Please don’t call me that.”

I felt an overwhelming need to hug him. He didn’t strike me as someone who would allow that, though. So I kept my hands close to my chest, folded over each other and gazing at my companion longingly.

_Why do I feel so homesick?_

_Probably because you are away from home. **Very** far away from home._

Vayne let me lead for once and I found myself walked through the halls of the station. High vaulted ceilings reached way up over our heads. The windows were tall and let light stream in from above. In several large corridors, chandeliers hung. The gray color combined with the daylight made for a light and airy feeling all around.

And then I found a piano. And gasped.

_“Yes,”_ I hissed excitedly. I practically ran to the instrument. It was black and pristine, in perfect condition. I didn’t recognize the name of its creator but it would probably sound beautiful anyway. I lifted the fallboard. The keys were smooth and sleek. I ran my fingers over them. Hardly any scratches were there. “It’s _perfect.”_

_We are friends now._

“You play?” Vayne said behind me. I jumped, having forgotten he was there.

“O-oh, yeah,” I breathed. “Sorry. I got excited.”

He looked from me to the piano and then back.

“Play me something,” he said. I perked up and scrambled to sit down on the bench. There was one song I loved so much that I hadn’t played on Eos yet. So I began to trill the notes.

As usual, I warmed up with the Mii Channel theme. And then I moved on to the song I _actually_ wanted to play.

The start of the song was just two little notes. I could feel Vayne’s gaze on me and did my best to ignore it. My left hand began its part, the right dipping down for a series of tied notes. My right foot pressed down on the damper pedal, releasing at the right moments so the different notes didn’t stick together. Soon my left hand was moving steadily as my right played a pretty, nostalgic tune. The fluttering of the octaves and the repeated eighth notes helped set a rhythm. I poured myself right into the song.

The sweet melody gave way to a melancholic roll. It repeated and repeated, with some slight variation. The creation of a somber mood made a crescendo into something more wistful. My hands played the chords, lilting them just right. The deft fingers danced their way up the keys together and ended with the tune from the beginning.

It was cute, short and sweet. A memory of stars and stargazing. The moon was our only friend. Up and up it went until my right hand swayed out a dramatic intensity. It grew louder and louder still, until the soft notes broke in. The motif from the start played again, more mature and sure this time. I played the descending notes, clear and strong. Slowly the song came back to its pensive mood. The two keys dwindled out into the ending chord.

“Absolutely stunning,” Vayne said softly, voice laced with awe. “Wherever did you learn to play like that?”

“My grandfather taught me when I was little,” I told him. “And then when I was six or seven, I took lessons. Then I took a break and just made up my own little songs and then when I was thirteen, I think, I took lessons again.”

“It certainly shows. Would you mind telling me the name of that song?”

“It’s a medley, actually, from a game called ‘To The Moon’.”

He nodded. A moment passed. “Well, as much as I’d like to stay here and listen to you play…”

“We got shit to do.”

He sighed at my cursing. “That is one way to put it.”

We made our way back through the halls of the station and back into the main room. As we reached the staircase to go back up to the city, I glanced back up at the painted ceiling.

“Hey, if our Zodiac is the same,” I said, “what’s your sign?”

“Capricorn,” Vayne answered. “And I’m afraid I don't really invest myself in such matters.”

“Alright, that’s cool.”

_He’s, like, the definition of a Capricorn, though._

The world the dark core maintained didn’t seem all that different from the light one. It was just, well, darker. The light coming from the sky wasn’t that of day or night. It was like this part of the world lived in eternal dawn or twilight. I could see the stars so clearly. There was nothing I recognized, but seeing that we were still somewhere in the known universe was comforting enough.

I’m not sure for how long we walked. Everything looked the same. Every so often we’d hear voices from Materia’s warriors and stayed out of sight accordingly. Once they were further ahead, we kept going. Twists and turns always took us right back to them. So, we went our own way and nearly got lost.

A small square surrounded by quaint, silver structures served as our resting point. While Vayne pondered a direction to go, I sat down, giving my aching feet a break.

_I could sleep forever._

Something began tugging at my conscious. It wasn’t the kind that felt like a string in my chest was being pulled like it did toward Noctis, no. But I had a feeling there was something in our vicinity that I just had to see. Looking around at the buildings, I wondered where to go. What looked like a small theater stood out to me. Vayne was still standing and thinking. I got up and walked to the theater.

“And just where do you think you’re going?” my friend called out.

“I feel like there’s something in there,” I said, looking back at him. “You can stay here. I’ll be right back!”

I opened the door. Everything was nearly pitch black inside except for the light coming through the door and windows. I heard Vayne’s footsteps follow me, and held the door open for him. Once both of us had entered the theater, we went further in. I could just make out an entryway on the other end of the room. It was right between two desks.

_There. That’s where it’s coming from._

Vayne followed me and my weird trance. There were curtains blocking the doorway, so I pushed them aside and slipped through.

I gasped in disbelief.

“No…”

An almost perfect model of the solar system hovered in a dark, empty room. The planets were made of swirling particles, color corresponding to what each looked like.

I nearly cried and rushed to the model of Earth, which was just big enough for me to hug. So I did. It was strangely solid. I gripped it tightly, not willing to let go. I heard Vayne coming up behind me slowly. I turned around and reluctantly released my home planet. It hovered and bobbed over my hands.

“Isn’t it beautiful?” I choked. The white, green, and blue particles swirled and mixed together happily. “This is my home. I haven’t seen it in so long…”

Vayne’s gaze moved down from me to the world in my hands.

“It’s like a big, blue marble.”

“It is beautiful,” he agreed. “But why is it here?”

“Who cares? I don’t wanna leave.”

I put Earth back in its space and went around to the other side of the line of planets so I could give Vayne an astronomy lesson.

“This is Mercury,” I said, gesturing to the small, gray planet in front. “He was the messenger of the Roman gods. Mercury is closest to the Sun.”

I looked to Venus.

“And that’s Venus. Roman goddess of love and beauty.”

My loving gaze fell to Earth.

“And that’s Earth. My home, and the only inhabitable planet in our solar system.”

I pointed to a nearly Earth-sized, red planet.

“That’s Mars, Roman god of war. We sent rovers to Mars to explore and gather scientific data.”

I stepped over to a line of small rocks.

“That’s the asteroid belt.”

My hand pointed to the largest planet.

“That’s Jupiter, the king of the Roman gods. It’s the biggest planet in our solar system and is made up of gas.”

I smiled at the one with visible rings.

“That’s Saturn, known for its rings. It is also a gas planet. I can’t remember what god it was named for, though.”

Next a planet whose color was a mix of deep blue and indigo.

“That’s Uranus. People like to make fun of its name. It and Neptune-”

I pointed to the blue one next to it.

“-were hard to differentiate because their magnetic fields are lopsided and for a while, we thought they were the same planet. Oh! And Uranus is actually tilted on its side, so its rings are vertical instead of horizontal like Saturn’s.”

I noticed a small, darker planet right outside Neptune’s reach.

“Oh, and that’s Pluto. God of the Underworld. Pluto was rejected as a planet some odd years ago and reclassified as a dwarf planet because it’s too small and its orbit is wacky.”

Proud of myself, I smiled up at Vayne. His eyes ran down the line of planets and back and then up to mine.

“You’re quite knowledgeable about the workings of the space around you,” he said.

“I like astronomy,” I said. “When I was little, my dad got me a telescope and then at night, my mom and I would lay out a blanket in the front yard and look at the stars.”

“Not your father as well?”

“He worked the night shift, so no.”

“Hmm.”

We shuffled back over to Earth. I brought back into my arms and rested my head on it.

“I miss it,” I whispered. “I miss it so much.”

“I’m sure you do,” Vayne said quietly. “I don’t believe I’ve ever expressed my sympathies.”

I shrugged. “It’s all good. I get enough from Noct and his friends. Er, _my_ friends, too, now.”

“Still, no one deserves such a fate. Least of all, you.”

That left a warm feeling in my chest.

“Thank you,” I said.

“You’re quite welcome.”

He let me spend a while in the company of the model planets, watching from a distance. I pushed them around their orbits, made them spin. Sometimes I’d ramble on abouts moons and fun facts about each world. But I was most drawn to Earth. I traced the outlines of the continents. I found the general area of my home city in its river valley. I smiled at the memories.

_I could stay here forever._

The planet crumbled into dust at my fingertips. My heart dropped, a pang of worry rushing through me.

“What…?” I whispered in shock. I frantically tried to grab all of it that I could. “No. No, no, no. No, no, no, please don’t go. Please don’t leave me…”

The dust drifted to the floor. I fell to my knees with my hands scrabbling to scrape up each particle.

“No, no, no, no, no. This can’t be happening. Please. Don’t. Please.”

“Wouldn’t it be easier to forget?” a deep voice sounded from the darkness. Vayne came hurrying over.

“No, it can’t be gone…”

“To live free of the burden of grief?”

I looked up as someone stepped out of the shadows and into the light of the model Sun, which was all that was left. He was tall with long, purple hair and dressed all in purple as well.

“What do you mean, ‘forget’?” I croaked. “Why would I want to forget my home?”

“There are people here from a land called ‘Orience.’ Crystals there grant them powers which in turn causes them to forget the dead. You, _______, seem like someone who could make use of such a gift.”

I slowly got to my feet. I spoke before Vayne could.

“Why the _hell_ would I want to forget?” I hissed. “Who the hell do you think you are?!”

A hand rested on my shoulder. I calmed slightly.

“My name is Caius Ballad,” Purple Man introduced himself. “And my new objective in this world is utilize the gift of Orience and bring it to all worlds.”

“That’s… insane,” I said with wide, confused eyes. “Why would anyone want to forget where they came from?”

“Doesn’t being away from your home hurt you? Does it not bring you immense pain?”

“Of _course_ it does!”

“Then why not forget? If you do not remember the pain or its source, you will be happy-”

_“Like hell I’ll be happy.”_

I took a few steps forward.

“I’ve already forgotten some things that have happened and it’s tearing me apart inside. And here you stand, asking me to _completely forget_ my home.”

Caius also stepped forward.

“Would you not argue it would relieve you of the burden?” he tried to reason. “Of grief? Of the loved ones you’ve lost?”

“This is ridiculous,” Vayne growled. “History should remain untouched. Should it be forgotten, we would be _lost.”_

“But we would be free-”

“No,” I cut in. “No, we sure as fuck wouldn’t be. I don’t care who you are or where you come from, but you just messed with my _home.”_

I drew Ithilcalad. Its blade shimmered in the model Sun’s light.

“That’s unforgivable.”

“So hostile,” Caius sighed. “I thought you would agree with me, seeing as your home was destroyed.”

_……What?_

“What does he mean by ‘destroyed’?” Vayne asked me.

“I don’t…” I swallowed thickly. “I don’t know. As far as I know, it’s still there.”

_No. It can’t be gone._

“So your memories are missing as well,” Caius said. “Perhaps it is better this way.”

“It sure as hell isn’t,” I countered, covering up the welling emotional tension inside of me. “Whether or not this is about me, where we come from is a huge part of who we are. If we were to forget everyone who died, what would the point of living? Living with so many gaps in your memories? Who would write the history books? Who would write _anything?”_

Tears pricked my eyes.

“You say you want to prevent the pain of losing a loved one. But in trying to undo that, you’re messing with a whole lotta shit that shouldn’t be messed with. So what if something bad happens? That’s an event. If we forget it, then we forget who we are. It’s not the event that matters, it’s how it affects _individual people_ that makes a difference.”

_I can’t forget home. Not after all it's done for me and for my family and friends._

Caius had no words for a moment. I did my best to swallow the lump forming in my throat. This man had done something unbelievably cruel.

“If that’s what you believe,” he said with a sigh. “But when you shall regain your memories, you will know I am right.”

He turned to walk away.

“How undeniably despicable you are,” Vayne said after him. His voice was filled with calm venom. Caius turned back to look at him. “Showing this poor woman something she’s lost only to have it crumble in her hands before her eyes. Have you no remorse? Not only for that, but suggesting she forget? That’s rather selfish of you, wanting to change the course of history so you can hide your own pain.”

“You know nothing of me,” Caius warned.

“I would argue against you, but she has already made the exact same points. You’d do well to think on them instead of blindly following your own whims.”

They stared each other down for a moment before Caius finally left. My mental state was crumbling like the model of Earth had before.

“It can’t be…” I whispered. “It just can’t be gone…”

“Shhhh,” Vayne hushed me, pulling me away from where Caius had been standing. “He wanted nothing more than to convince you to join him.”

“But what if it is gone? What if that’s what I’m not remembering? How could I just _forget?_ Am I a hypocrite?”

“It would be best not to think on it. If you dwell on it now, you’ll only hurt yourself more.”

He was right. I knew he was right. It was just so hard to take.

“Come. I don’t believe there’s anything for us in this part of the world.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ve never played FFXIII so idk Caius. He was the villain for Act 2, Chapter 1, so I rolled with it. However, I did read his wiki page and he seems as unreasonable as any other villain when it comes to his beliefs. So idk - the Solar System model didn’t exactly come from him - it was a manifestation of Reader’s suppressed thoughts. The crumbling was Caius tho
> 
> Anyway - two more chapters till Noctis makes a cameo!!!
> 
> Here’s the song Reader played on the piano:  
> https://youtu.be/IN8soKGjiGg


	47. Requiem

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And it all comes flooding back...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go - the one we’ve all been waiting for. I decided to upload slightly early just ‘cause. Enjoy!

“Whatcha thinkin’ about?”

We were in a Torsion, heading to the next part of the Dark World that could possibly hold whatever ‘brilliance’ was. Vayne glanced at me.

“Does it matter?” he asked. I shrugged.

“It’s just been quiet for a while,” I said. “I was wondering if you were okay.”

He almost smiled. “I appreciate the sentiment, but I assure you, I am perfectly fine.”

_Damn right you are._

_Stop._

Vayne spoke again, but I didn’t hear what he said. My eyes watched the movement of his lips.

_I wonder how soft they are. They look so full and plush! What would they feel like against mine?_

_...Why am I thinking about this…_

“______?”

I jerked out of my trance. “Huh?”

“Do pay attention for once, if you don’t mind.”

“Sorry… What were you saying?”

“I was thinking about what you said in that room. About how events and their effects differ in meaning to each person.”

“Oh yeah. What about it?”

“I simply found myself agreeing. I could’ve come to that conclusion, myself, in time. But you worded it perfectly. I shan’t forget it.”

I hummed. “Guess we’ve both learned something from each other, then.”

“Oh?”

“Yep.”

“And what is it that I have taught you?”

I hesitated. Slight heat crept up my cheeks as I recalled his wording from what felt like forever ago.

“That…” I licked my lips, “people are human by the societies they build. I’ve never thought of it that way before, but I do kinda agree… I don’t think… I don’t think I’ll ever forget that.”

“Good to know I can influence at least one mind. History is made by mankind and thus, should stay that way. But I suppose the tone of certain events changes depending on who is telling the story.”

“Winners write the stories. They make themselves out to be the heroes. You never hear the other side straight from the source.”

“Very true. And so, the world is in the grasp of the powerful, as it should be.”

I gaze up at him. “Why?”

“...‘Why’? The weak cannot lead or they would not be weak.”

“Then why not help them to be strong?”

“It wouldn’t be worth the trouble-”

“Are you sure?”

He glanced down at me, waiting for me to argue my point.

“I couldn’t wield a sword until recently and didn’t have magic prior to that, either. I’m too shy to stand up for myself most of the time, too anxious to do things by myself. Look at me now.”

“Your circumstances have changed. That’s hardly your doing.”

“Exactly. I couldn’t have gotten here without help. In order to make progress, you need to have help from all sides, and that includes someone from the inside of what you’re trying to change.”

“Hmm…”

“If you don’t give people a chance to improve themselves, nothing would ever change. My world knows that pretty well. Racism, sexism, xenophobia… They’re all _still_ around because people refuse to change their views on there being a ‘superior’ something or other.”

“I’m inclined to believe you, but I doubt you’ve been trained in the matter.”

“I haven’t. I’m definitely not claiming to be an expert. Just thought I’d leave my own thoughts out there for ya.”

“You are an utter enigma.”

“I thought we established I have no obligation to make sense you.”

I grinned at him.

“If that is the case,” he teased, “then I am under no obligation to make sense to _you.”_

“Touché. But I’ll give you that. And for the record, I _do_ understand where you’re coming from. ‘Survival of the fittest’ and all that.”

“You’re rather open minded.”

“It’s hard for me to make up my mind on stuff, so I just take things as they are.”

“I wasn’t criticizing. It’s admirable.”

I blushed lightly and shielded my face with my hair. Not knowing how to respond, I stayed that way for a minute before peering back up at him. Vayne was rather regal, looking ahead and chin held high. My heart swelled just admiring him. If hadn’t been so far gone already… I couldn’t imagine _not_ being attracted to such a man.

_Okay, seriously, that’s enough. There’s only so much about this guy you can gush about._

_I can do whatever the hell I want, thanks._

When I saw his head move to see why I was staring, I stared back to the other end of the purple, dimensional tunnel. Instead of letting myself get wound up into a lovestruck mess of nervousness, I thought back to what Caius had said.

_“I thought you would agree with me, seeing as your home was destroyed.”_

I’d ask what that meant, but it was self-explanatory. He thought Earth had been… had been…

I couldn’t finish that thought. Just thinking about it nearly had me in tears. I had to shake my head to clear it away. Continuing to let it bother me wouldn’t help anyone.

Eyes downcast and mood having been dropped significantly, I followed Vayne through the end of the Torsion. It opened up to an enormous mountain. I couldn’t see the top. Clouds dashed the sky here and there. The stars still peeked out. I longed to touch them, fly through space, and go straight back home. But it wouldn't happen.

There was, conveniently, a path leading up. We could see several people already up the mountain, moving along it. I looked to Vayne, silently asking if we should follow them.

“We should stay hidden,” he said. “If they see us, it will pose a problem.”

I nodded. We would stick to remaining under what trees were along the mountainside. There weren’t many, but there were other forms of cover. Large bushes were also fun to hide behind. The walkway itself was almost carved into the stone, so the boulders and formations making it up covered our tracks rather well anyway.

Walking up a steep incline was rather taxing. My legs were aching more than they already had been. The heartbeat going wild in my chest had me concerned. I wondered if this was how Noctis, Gladio, and Prompto felt while they were on the Rock of Ravatogh. Maybe Vayne let would me take a break…?

“Are you stalling on purpose?” he called from up ahead.

“Sorry, I’m not much of a hiker,” I coughed. “You can go on ahead. I’ll just…”

I stopped and looked around. There was a small boulder that seemed good enough to sit on.

“I’ll be there in a minute.”

I heard him sigh as I sat down. His footsteps came closer as I tried to calm my breathing.

“If you want to improve yourself,” he said. A hand gripped my arm. I was suddenly lurched to my feet. I bumped into his chest trying to stabilize myself, “you need to keep moving.”

“I literally feel like I’m about to _die,”_ I breathed. He scoffed.

“I seriously doubt that. Now, hurry. I have a feeling that there is something waiting for us up ahead.”

_You may be attractive, but this isn’t okay._

I trudged behind him bitterly the rest of the way.

Finally, we came to an entrance of some kind. A great, light blue door had been opened before us. Materia’s bunch must’ve been through here already. I took a peek inside. There was a series of hallways the same color as the door. Columns and mirrors lined the way down to a room that light was flowing from. It seemed safe enough. I tried pushing the door further open. It hardly budged.

“Here,” Vayne said. We both managed to open the door enough for a person to slip through. Well, I say ‘we.’ It was mostly Vayne. “This seems a sacred space.”

I got a weird feeling while traversing the blue hallways. My heart jumped into action, nervously fluttering. Something was waiting to be discovered here. I wasn’t sure what and I wasn’t sure whether it was good or bad.

“My, what a marvel…”

Finally, we came to the room at the back. It was full of mirrors and columns. Warrior and the others must have come this way. Scorch marks and scratches lined the floor near the mirror at the back. Speaking of the mirror at the back… A person was staring out from it. Only one person. I walked forward as Vayne inspected the rest of the room for signs of clues about the crystal core.

_Is that… me?_

I curiously approached the mirror. The Me on the other side wasn’t smiling. No, she was… depressed. Devoid of emotion. Her eyes were empty of everything but hopelessness. I tilted my head. She didn’t. Fear rose up in me. I took a step back.

“Curious…” Vayne muttered nearby. “This mirror doesn’t seem to be working.”

Vayne’s reflection was nonexistent. All that was there was the very depressed Me and the mirror of the room we were in. I refused to get closer.

“I don’t like this…” I whispered.

“You’ll like what you came here for even less, then,” Me said, voice misty from the other side of the mirror. I jumped back. Two hands found my shoulders and I flinched. Vayne had caught me before I turned and bolted. I knew better than to mess with a talking mirror.

“Would you mind being more specific?” he asked politely. Me just blinked at him. Then her gaze fell back to me.

“You look so happy…” she choked. Now she looked like she was about to cry. “I wish I could feel that way.”

“Wh- what do you want…?” I managed to squeak.

“I have what you’re looking for. But you won’t like what you find.”

“You have brilliance?” Vayne asked. Me nodded. “Your memories… You should take them.”

“No, you really shouldn’t.”

“Why?” I asked. “I’m missing so much.”

If _myself_ was advising me not to do something… then I wasn’t sure _what_ to do.

“Just stay this way a little longer,” Me pleaded. “Come back later when you… When your curiosity gets the better of you. Like it always does.”

“Just tell me what happened.”

She shook her head. “Go. Come back later.”

“No.”

“Don’t be stubborn.”

“Funny, coming from you.”

She was quiet for a moment. Then she sighed.

“This is why I hate you so much,” she said, “among other reasons.”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it,” I said impatiently. “Can I have my memories back?”

“Come get them, then.”

I gazed up at Vayne. To say he was concerned would be an understatement. His green eyes met mine.

“I would say to wait…” he said. “But this _is_ what we’ve been looking for.”

He released my shoulders.

“Just be careful. It would seem the others had a problem with this mirror, judging from the marks on the floor.”

“I won’t attack you,” Me said. “Cecil was at war with himself about the stuff he’d done. I just needed reprieve.”

_I **chose** to forget?_

“Go on,” Vayne said softly. I stepped forward with a hand reaching out to the glass. One touch, and I was inside. It wasn’t any different from the outside. Instead of Vayne next to me, I faced myself. I never thought talking to myself would be so terrifying.

“So… now what?” I asked. Me closed her eyes.

“I don’t think I can-” she cut herself off. Then she whispered, “You’ll hate yourself more.”

“Been there, done that… Please…”

“No.”

_“Please.”_

“Not in front of him.”

I glanced at Vayne on the other side, who respectively turned away.

“Why not?”

“...There’s no telling how you might react. I wouldn’t want you to… well… break down.”

“Is it… that bad?”

“Worse.”

“So I can’t get home. I still have Noctis and Ignis and Prompto and Gladio.”

A tear ran down her face.

“...I… _will_ still have them… Right?”

“Keep telling yourself that.”

I said nothing for a moment and closed my eyes. When I reopened them, Me looked so… empty. She stared at me blankly, like she wasn’t even looking _at_ me. Like she was staring into space.

“Please just hand them over,” I said.

She sighed and looked away and then back.

“Really,” she said. “You don’t want them right now.”

“Yes, I do.”

“No, you don’t.”

_“Yes, I do!”_

“And what will you do then, huh? Cry about it? Stand there and ignore it until it's too much? Pretend it’s all a dream until one day-”

Her voice cracked. I could see the beginnings of tears forming in her eyes.

“...until one day you realize you really _won’t_ see anyone ever again…? That they’re all… all…”

I let her compose herself.

“So no,” she said, shaking off her emotions as best she could. “I will not give them to you. Not yet. Just be happy for a little while longer.”

“But I’m _not_ happy! Not without my memories! I can’t even remember what Ignis made for breakfast this morning!”

She grimaced at the mention of Iggy. My own expression contorted into one of horrified confusion.

“What happened to Ignis?” I demanded somewhat quietly.

“He’s fine now.”

Panic lit my heart up like a burst of flame.

“WHAT HAPPENED-?!” I started loudly. With a deep breath, I swiftly calmed myself, “...to Ignis…?”

“Please stop,” Me said, voice tight. “I don’t want to think about it. _Any_ of it.”

“Why won’t you just tell me…?!”

“Because!!”

Her outburst caught me off guard.

“Because you’ll react horribly!” she shouted, looking angry now. “Because you won’t know what to do with yourself! Because you won’t know how to move forward! Because you won’t know how to _live…_ Because… Because you might… _kill yourself…_ Because…”

A tear fell from her eyes.

“Because you might turn against them.”

_What?!_

“Why…?” I gasped. “Why would I…?”

My hands curled into fists as anger boiled up inside me.

“You’re _me,”_ I hissed distraughtly through my teeth. “You know I would _never_ do something like that to my friends. You- _How **dare** you think I’d do such a thing-!”_

“But your predisposition to get home, to figure why you were sent there… If you figure out _who,_ you could… I’m afraid of what will happen if they disagree.”

“Disagree with _what?!”_

“With _you!_ With your instincts! You and I both know the five stages of grief. You’ll reach depression and anger at the same time. Or in reverse order. It won’t be pretty.”

 _“Did_ I act on these instincts?”

“Well, no, but still-...”

“Then you have _no_ right to keep these from me if we haven’t turned against each other.”

“But you still _could-”_

“Well, if I _haven’t_ yet, then hand them over. You’re past me. Let present me and future me make the decisions now.”

“You know damn well neither of us trusts future us with anything let alone… _this.”_

I let out a groan. She was trying to get me off topic and stall some more.

“Just give me the brilliance,” I said sternly. “And we’ll be out of here, easy-peasy.”

“I’m telling you: it’s _not_ that _simple.”_

“I didn’t _say it was!”_

“Just enjoy your time with Vayne some more… And Terra and Cecil and Y’shtola… Just have _fun_ with this.”

I growled. “Dammit! I _am!_ So stop being so fucking stubborn and give me the _fucking memories!”_

 _“Fine!_ You want them?”

She held out a hand. Something invisible sparkled in it, like the power I had absorbed from the crystal.

“Come and get them. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

I blacked out.

 

_“You should know, we have Lady Lunafreya in our care. And… the empire demands we surrender her.”_

 

_“Who are you, where did you come from, and what are you doing here?”_

_That’s Ardyn…_

_“_______, Hammerhead, traveling with friends.” And that’s me._

_“Your **full** name, please.”_

_Give him a fake name._

_He already knows my name._

_Fake last name, then._

_“________ Solidor.”_

_Wow._

 

_“But there’s six of them, right, and like, millions of you! Not to mention they’ve been asleep for thousands of years, doing nothing. Why should Noctis need their **permission** to take Lucis back?”_

_“______…” Ignis began. “Did… something else occur last night for you to suddenly become so passionate about this?”_

 

_“Um, I hate to bring down the mood,” I said, “but you know that’s a _narwhal,_ right?”_

 

_“Woah, woah, woah,” Gladio said. “Easy. I didn’t mean to rile you up that much.”_

_“Huh? What did I do?”_

_“You just about set stone on fire. Look.”_

 

_When Prompto found me later, I had been crowned with a ring of golden flowers._

 

_“This one is called the Lovers card. It’s name and meaning are pretty straightforward at first glance. However, the relationship in question doesn’t have to be romantic. Someone you’re close with feels that same deep connection.”_

_“Noctis, perhaps?” Ignis prompted._

_“In the days to come, you’ll both be in a vulnerable state. Your bond will be given an opportunity to strengthen. ...But perhaps… It’s more than one person?”_

 

_“The Lovers also represent values and beliefs. You’ve recently established yours and it might pay off to bring you closer to the people you care for. Two forces in opposition will need to be brought together and your beliefs and kind heart will aid in that process.”_

 

_When I was finished, I gave Noctis the biggest smile. It was instantly returned._

 

_“The point is,” Ignis said, “we each wished to give you something to remember us by. I have a feeling we’re reaching a point of no return.”_

_“You…” I swallowed. “You guys didn’t have to… You didn’t have to do that.”_

_“I know,” Noctis said. “But we wanted to.”_

 

My visions took a turn.

 

_Ardyn Izunia was kneeling beside a fallen Lunafreya. The same knife he had threatened me with was in his hand. He didn’t seem to have seen me._

_“On second thought, you let him have it,” he snarled. The knife plunged into Luna’s gut._

 

_“Yet you know **nothing** of the consequences.”_

_Was… was communing with the gods killing her? No wonder he was so upset!_

_Can I help?_

_“No, ______, please don’t,” Luna managed to say. “I cannot be healed. Not from this. It’s too much.”_

_“No, no, no, I’m not letting you die,” I said sternly. “I’ve come too damn far for that and you have a Noctis to console and reunite with. If you die, I will actually follow you into the afterlife and kick your ass.”_

 

_“How could she be healed from a wound like **that?”**_

_I was shoved aside as Ignis pushed me out of harm’s way. His daggers held Ravus back._

_“Ravus, listen to me,” he said. “______ was blessed by the gods to have unbelievable abilities. One of those abilities is healing. Check the wound yourself. You won’t find one.”_

_“Please, Ravus…” I whispered. His eyes flitted to me. “Noct is like my brother. I wouldn’t just let his beloved **die.”**_

 

_“Stop,” I croaked. No answer._

_Ignis shoved Ravus back, falling himself before doing so again. He looked so weak against Ravus, but he kept trying._

_“Stop!”_

 

_“And ______, bless her soul. She’s from a different planet, Ravus. She’s lost more than all of us combined and yet she still remains strong and caring.”_

_“Lies.”_

_“It is the truth! She has lost her home, her family, her friends, her culture, and her history, and you stand here wanting to take away the only thing she has left!”_

_“And what would that be?”_

_“Noctis! They are as brother and sister, a healer and a ruler destined to sacrifice all for the masses. Surely you understand **that.”**_

_Ravus brought his sword up in rage. The darkening sky lit up with energy. Just as he charged his next blow, electricity zapped through the air. I had absorbed it. His eyes met mine._

_“_______, what are you doing?!”_

 

_I was forced to my feet and restrained. I thrashed against them as I watched them shove Ignis to the ground. Ardyn made sure to keep me in his sight._

_Noctis was just lying there on the ground, defenseless._

_“Let him go!” I pleaded. “Please him go! Let them all go!”_

_Ignis was completely helpless as well. The MTs’ hold would not let up and he had no room to even wiggle. Ardyn ignored me._

_“The game’s up, my boy,” he said lightly, knocking Ignis unconscious with his foot._

 

_“I… swore… an oath,” Ignis declared. He had something in his hand, “to stand with Noct and keep him safe. Whatever it takes, I will protect him!”_

_Lunafreya had the Ring._

_**No.** _

 

_Ardyn was hardly even fighting back._

 

_“The gods care not for you or your friends.”_

_“There’s no changing fate, _______, you of all people should know that.”_

_“It is most perverted that you should require the gods’ **approval** to make history.”_

_“Should you stand in the way of destiny, I **will** cut you down.”_

_They did this. They did this to all of us. If you trace it all back, it just comes to the gods and their sick way of torturing my friends._

_An explosion of white fire erupted into the night. A shriek pierced the air. My hands had reached their destination. Ardyn didn’t even have time to dodge._

_“Stop. Hurting. My. Friends.”_

 

_“Um, so… There’s something I’ve been needing to talk to you about.”_

_“I know,” Luna rasped. Her eyes narrowed as she struggled to keep tears back. “I know, and yet…”_

_She let out a choked breath._

_“I wish I was not the one to tell you.”_

 

_“So I…” I licked my lips. “I can’t go home…?”_

_“No,” she whispered. “It isn’t possible. But I must tell you why.”_

 

_“...Just know this: it is not your fault, and it could not be helped.”_

 

_“It was a meteor- an asteroid. It…”_

_A heartbreaking gasp left her as she tried to stop crying._

_**No.** _

_“There was nothing they could do,” she sobbed._

_**No.** _

_“It hit the surface and then… They had no Archaean to break its fall.”_

_**No.** _

_“I’m sorry, ______.”_

 

_“A power greater than even that of the Six, purifying all by the light and the glaives of rulers past. Only at the throne can the Chosen receive it, and only at the cost of two lives: his own and his twin’s.”_

 

_The waking world flashed back into view. Pryna sat before me, ears drooping._

_Silence._

_“Are you telling me…”_

_“...that we’re, like, soulmates, or something?”_

_With a piercing, **heart** wrenching sob, I flung my arms around the dog, and cried._

 

When I came back to consciousness, I was standing just outside the mirror. I must’ve just come out because Vayne turned to face me. He looked expectant. My face was expressionless. We stared at each other for a while.

“Well…?” he broke the silence. That was all it took. “How did it-?”

My sobbing gasp met his ears. I brought my hands up to grip my hair and tried to calm myself.

_No, no, no there’s no way. It’s not possible. There’s no way._

_You know it is. It did. **It’s gone.**_

Everything suddenly disappeared. I couldn’t see anything but my own tears and all I could hear was my frantic thoughts and the distant sound of Vayne being very worried. I repeated the word ‘no’ over and over. Another panic attack violently swept over me.

_No, no, no, not here, not here. Not in front of Vayne. Not again._

A deep breath forced its way into my lungs. I held it and let go. Then it happened again. And again. My breathing slowed at its own pace. Once I was in control of myself, I searched for the nearest source of comfort I could find.

A shocked breath left Vayne as my arms gripped him tight. His own were lifted but were confused about what to do. He didn’t move. So I just stood there, unwilling to let go.

“It can’t, it can’t,” I gasped quietly. “It can’t. It _can’t.”_

 _“What_ can’t?” Vayne’s voice reached a level of softness I never would have expected from him. “Speak to me, _______. Tell me what’s wrong.”

“It’s _gone._ It’s gone and I can’t- _I can’t.”_

“So Caius was correct…”

_“They destroyed it.”_

My sad embrace was hesitantly returned.

_**“Why?!”** _

“Shh…”

_“They killed it and they’re gonna kill **me.”**_

“Hush. Talking like that will make it worse. Look at it from a critical view.”

“They want me dead, Vayne. They want me _dead, and Noctis, too!”_

“Who wants you dead?”

_**“The Astrals!”** _

My voice cracked. His own steady breathing hitched for a moment. I could feel the rage boiling up and shaking inside him now. I gripped him tighter.

“Please don’t get mad,” I whispered pleadingly. The last thing I needed was someone’s anger directed at me, even if it was unintentional.

“A bit difficult, but I will try.”

A hand found its way to my hair.

“Let it out, _____. You deserve that much.”

 

I don’t know how long I stood there, crying in Vayne’s arms. The surrealness of it had me wondering if this was nothing but a dream. Vayne Solidor of all people? Comforting me? _Again?_ I wish I could say it was too good to be true. But the reason I was crying was far from good.

He didn’t say much. I’m fairly certain he stood there letting his anger at the gods build a bonfire inside of him. Thankfully he had the sense not to make my situation worse by commenting on it. Every so often I could feel him trembling with rage. At least, that’s what I think it was.

Calming down left me completely emotionally drained. I focused on the feeling of a hand absentmindedly running through my hair. I sighed, relieved my breakdown was now over, and let my head truly rest on his chest. Then I began to tell him in the simplest way I could what had happened in Altissia. And then, my tears returned during my short account of the aftermath and the Oracle’s decrees. And lastly, through shaky gasps of breath, I managed a few sentences of what Pryna had showed me. It was something I hadn’t even told Noctis. Not once did either of us let go of the other.

“So small a thing…” Vayne sighed when I was done. “So fragile and yet so strong. I never would have guessed…”

I sniffed and kept my eyes closed.

“______, listen to me.”

“Mm?”

“Everything you have faced, of what you have told me, at the very least, would be traumatic and heartbreaking for anyone. To be the last of your kind, the only one who remembers… I cannot even _imagine_ how broken you must feel.

“But you are strong. At first glance, I never would have guessed someone so innocent had been through such horrors. In fact, when I first laid eyes on you, I admit all I saw was a girl frightened of conflict with an abnormal amount of compassion. Forgive me for thinking you weak. It is not often I make such a misjudgment.

“And here you stand, mourning the only world you’ve ever known, crying for a fate that is not easily changed. But know that it is _not_ the end. You’re allowed to scream, you’re allowed to cry…”

One of his arms retreated to lift my chin up. His peridot gaze bore right into mine.

“But do _not_ give up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man some of this was hard to write - not because it hurt to think about - well, I guess it did - but I also had to think about what would happen if I argued with myself about something so important. And this happened! Yay...  
> Anyway, @ElijahAlexander thanks for voicing Vayne and making him into the character we see before us :D  
> ALSO  
> I would like to announce that two stories for both Vayne’s and Noctis’ POVs are up. I forgot to mention that last week, sorry >w< So if you’re interested, go ahead and take a look!


	48. Last of the Real Ones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noctis and Vayne worry about _______.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) Yes, the title is a Fall Out Boy reference  
> 2) This chapter is entirely from Vayne’s and Noctis’ POVs  
> 3) One or two FFXII spoilers  
> 4) Hi!!!

To say their journey took a turn in atmosphere would be the understatement of the year. Vayne had been worried about what the mirror would reveal as soon as _______ 's Reflection declared her hatred for herself. He knew she was rather insecure and her anxiety often got the better of her, but he certainly hadn’t expected such a claim so suddenly. And when she had come _out_ of the mirror…

Vayne prided himself on his composure. There was not much he cared for other than a handful of things. Namely, his nation, his lineage, and his brother. He never imagined he had room for anything else. Oh, how wrong he was.

Being incorrect was a feeling he loathed. It embarrassed him; it was humiliating in the presence of others. And here was this woman, surely not much younger than himself, who had repeatedly shown him his judgment wasn’t always right.

_A soft heart in a cruel world, indeed,_ he thought to himself. After she had regained her memories of him, he decided that finding the rest of them was more important than the crystal. Or rather, he felt it wouldn’t be too bad of an idea to change course to add it in along the way. He almost regretted his decision the moment she broke down for the second time.

When last they’d met, not once had she shown signs of a fragile state of mind. Seeing it again frightened him. Yes, it _frightened_ him and he didn’t know _why._ The first time had merely been a slight annoyance in their hurry to dispose of Mog. She hadn’t _meant_ to break down and it was clear she felt a hindrance to him and was willing to stay away if he so wanted. That alone erased his thoughts of leaving her behind. She was much more considerate than anyone else in that world. That he knew of, at least.

Now that he thought about it, it should have been obvious that her mind was not in a good place. After all, being forced to a world not her own and then having it happen not once, not twice, but _thrice,_ now, would take a toll on anyone. He wondered why he didn’t think her a nuisance because of it. Usually he would. But then… Her bond with Noctis touched his heart in a way he wasn’t expecting. Perhaps they reminded him of the earlier days with Larsa. Back when things were less complicated, less demanding… Surprisingly, it didn’t surprise _him_ when she told him that she and Noctis were apparently soul mates.

_There’s that burning feeling again,_ he told himself. He didn’t know what it was. It occurred at the thought of her and someone else. At the thought of how little he truly knew of her and how little she knew of him. She had told him much more about herself than he had of himself. Well, he was a private man. She was an open book that had been turned over on the table while someone saved their place. All you had to do was ask and she’d answer.

She sniffed. He let her continue her sorrows. For once, he was speechless. Her… predicament, her fate, and everything in between was a problem he should have avoided and not wanted anything to do with. And yet… He felt drawn to it, to her. Like a man starved of attention, of _proper_ attention. He found he enjoyed her odd demeanor, her whims, her passions. He wasn’t sure he liked the feeling. The last thing he needed was a distraction.

But no, he would not distance himself. Not when she needed him most. He wasn’t even entirely sure why she stayed with him when Materia’s warriors were much more accommodating and accepting. Her loyalty was unwavering and both his mind and the heart he kept so secretly hidden and well guarded fed on it. They _gorged_ themselves on what she gave them.

He could not abandon her now, as much as he told himself he should. As much as he almost _wanted_ to, merely to save himself the time and pain of becoming somewhat close to someone only to have to leave them so soon.

Or he could simply take her with him. That seemed a logical option. She’d be far away from the abominations the people of Eos deemed ‘the Astrals.’ They would not harm her there, he’d make sure of it. And not only that, but she would be given the proper time to mourn her home and her family, her history and culture. Perhaps in time, she would come to see Ivalice as he did. Perhaps she would love Archadia as dearly as he.

...Would she? Her mind was a maze, a labyrinth as deep and wide as the sea. Every time he thought he had her figured out, she would do something that utterly baffled him. Such as their argument about the destruction of the Crystal Core of Light. She had argued with him, nearly cried again, angered him further, and then destroyed it herself anyway. Granted, she’d had good reason to do so. The power of the crystal could either go to her or to the planesgorger and he’d much rather it be her any day.

Who was he kidding? Certainly not himself. He _liked_ her. He _liked_ having her around. He _liked_ the way she confused him in the most puzzling of ways and he _liked_ that she stayed with him no matter how much she may disagree with him. He liked her kindness, her open mindedness, her willing to talk things out rather than immediately resort to unnecessary fighting. She reminded him of his brother in those ways, but she also reminded him of himself. Back when he had been just a bit younger, right before the war with his own brothers. Before his own innocence had been truly stripped away as he killed them.

That took a turn. But still… She held his views, most of his beliefs, and had taught him a thing or two in return. They weren’t completely alike and that relieved him. It was satisfactory. The last person he’d want to conspire with was himself. He prided himself on not being corrupt like the rest of Archadia before he stepped in in his brother’s stead. But that did not mean he would work well with himself. Two like ends of a magnet repel each other. It would be infuriating.

Like her. Like her endless knowledge of things she deemed unimportant but meant the world to her. Like her undying devotion to whatever gained the privilege of being her passion. Like the way she looked at him so happily when she realized he was listening to her, _truly_ listening to her. That joyful smile… The looks she gave him that she thought he didn’t see. He liked them all, but it was infuriating. He didn’t know _why_ he liked it so much. He didn’t know _why_ he kept her around when she infuriated him so. He didn’t know _why_ he _liked_ her in such a manner-

Oh.

Oh no.

Oh no, no, no.

“Vayne?”

Oh dear. He should _not_ like the way she said his name.

“...Vayne?”

No, it was not right. She was a _commoner._ He was the son of the _emperor himself._ Hell, he _was_ the emperor now! They were not compatible!

“...Um… Hmm.”

And then there was the feeling of her in his arms. Oh, how he loved the sensation though it was during the worst situation possible.

“Are you okay?”

She may be caring and protective of those she loved, but did she not know it was she that needed protection?

“Vayne???”

He had to stop. This was getting ridiculous. It was nothing more than a passing fancy, a fleeting feeling. It would be gone as soon as he returned to Ivalice.

“Okay, well, I think I’m ready to go now.”

_No, no, you’re not, and you know that much better than I do._

“...You’re scaring me. Please don’t tell me you’re so angry you can’t talk.”

_Angry? How could I be angry when you are near? How could anyone be?_

“...I know what the Astrals did is unforgivable, but there isn’t much we can do about that at the moment.”

Oh. Right. The _Astrals._ Vayne sighed.

“And yet they deserve all manner of righteous vengeance,” he said. She looked down at her hands.

“I know,” she said quietly. “I’m just trying not to think about it.”

_Please… Continue to lean on me. Tell me what it is that troubles you so._

She said nothing else. He needed to do something about the anxious state his heart was in. Did he have a heart? Yes, he did. There were not many that knew that, but he was one of them. And he was _not accustomed_ to feeling like a schoolboy who had just discovered he fancied a girl. He was a Solidor, dammit. He should act like one!

“Are you sure you’re alright?” He asked, voice thankfully steady.

“I’m never alright,” she said with a joking grin. He frowned. The closer to her he became, the more concerning traits she displayed. “But yeah. I’m emotionally exhausted, but that’s nothing new.”

...Stars above, she was going to give him a heart attack. Were Noctis and his companions not taking care of her emotional needs?

_Why does it even come to mind? Why should I care?_

“Depression and all that. But that’s nothing new, either.”

This girl needed his protection and he and his bloodline would be damned if she didn’t receive it.

 

Of all the things Noctis was expecting to happen after the shitshow with Leviathan, being transported to Nonsense Land was not one of them.

It had been a few days after _____ 's revelation of her home’s destruction, maybe about a week. He remembered how quickly he had rushed to her room after Luna calmed down enough to tell them what had happened. Ignis had caught him just in time as he almost wrenched the door open when she didn’t answer his knocking.

“Leave her be,” Ignis had said. “She needs time to process this and cope.”

Though Noct’s room was right next to hers, he hadn’t left his sister’s doorside all night.

A week of depression passed. Luna wasn’t doing any better and ______ hardly ever came out of her room. She only ate when Ignis made her and when anyone asked her a question even remotely related to Earth, she broke down crying. It was heartbreaking.

Still, she insisted on coming with them to Gralea. She didn’t want Noctis out of her sight, and he didn’t want her out of his. Unfortunately, Gladio wasn’t helping. Luna had also told them of ______ 's fate to help Noctis purge the world of darkness. While he did try to keep his frustrations in check, Gladio wasn’t all too happy with her ‘moping about the train.’ His words, not Noctis’. Even if she offered to stay back in one of the rooms, he’d get picky. A sort of tension had risen between them. Their first stop at an abandoned quarry made for a good reconciliation point. But all that had happened was… Well, this.

Noctis had found his way to a small field while they waited and then some kids had gotten in some trouble with a monster. He’d helped out, but they insisted on staying. He instantly realized something wasn’t right when they began using magic of all things.

“Thank you very much,” another kid with platinum blond hair said. His name was Hope.

“I’m not sure they needed it,” Noct said. “Those battle-hardened kids are something else.”

“Kids have to fight sometimes in their worlds,” said another guy, Zell. He and Hope had come running over with a few others when they saw the battle.

“‘Their worlds?’ Oh don’t tell me…”

“Indeed,” said a man who looked a tad like Ignis. “You’ve stumbled into a junction of sorts, connecting multiple worlds to each other.”

“We’ve got folks from all over,” Zell said.

“I wonder if anyone I know is here, too,” Noct wondered. He desperately hoped _____ hadn’t gotten wrapped up in this again. He wasn’t sure it’d be good for her. What if it broke her completely? He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if something happened and he couldn’t do anything to stop it.

“I don’t think we’ve run into anyone else with your fashion sense.”

“...What did you say your name was again?” asked a sandy blonde girl named Penelo.

“Just call me Noctis.”

She gasped and looked at Not-Ignis, who looked back. Both of them did not seem happy.

“What? What happened?”

“You’re not going to like it,” Not-Ignis (Balthier) said slowly.

“Just tell me!”

“Alright, calm down. We ran into your friend, _____.”

_“What?”_

“She’s missing her memories,” Penelo said. “She asked about you. Then… she went with _Vayne.”_

“Oh, thank the gods.”

A wave of relief washed over him. At least someone she knew was here to look after her.

“‘Thank the gods’?” Balthier looked almost disgusted. “For _Vayne?”_

“He’s not exactly good news…” Penelo said. “He’s from our world, and…”

“You should ask Vaan about it. He was there for most of it.”

“So you’ll come with us?” Zell asked. Right, he was there, too.

“Sure, why not?” Noct said. “Now tell me what happened to my sister.”

Finding Vaan was the easy part. They remembered each other and then Cecil appeared to greet him. Warrior, too. It was good to see them again, but…

“I have nothing all that nice to say about _____,” Vaan said. “If she sides with Vayne, then that’s that.”

“Will someone please just tell me what the hell is going on?” Noctis asked. He looked at Cecil and Warrior.

“I was there, too,” Cloud said, coming over. “She’s got a good heart, I’ll give her that.”

Then a strange cat riding a stuffed animal joined in.

“Oh, are you talking about Vayne and ______?” he asked. “Sad fate, the poor girl. I gave her her fortune.”

Noctis did not like the story they told him. He wasn’t completely appalled by his sister’s reckless actions - they were nothing new - but learning more about Vayne and his way of thinking nearly had him in a mood for a headhunt.

“And you just _let_ her go?” he said loudly.

“It was her choice, Noct,” Cecil said.

“She wasn’t too pleased with Vayne’s actions, either,” Warrior added. “Seeing her upset was rather unsettling to all of us, including him.”

“She was rather attached to him,” Cait Sith said. “A mite hard to let go of a fancy that strong.”

“Fancy?” Vaan chimed in. “Don’t tell me she’s still… I can’t even say it.”

“Infatuated?” Noct said. “Yeah. Well, maybe not _that_ much, but still… I thought I could trust him with her. He told me I could.”

“I remember,” Cecil said. Warrior nodded.

“He had taken good care of her,” he said. “She wasn't harmed or scared.”

“Not until the crystal core,” Vaan bitterly put. Noct sighed, exasperated.

“What did she do?” he asked. They told him. “She _what-?_ Of course she did. But… It sounds like there wasn’t any other choice.”

“She could’ve stopped Vayne!”

“All by herself?” Cloud asked.

“It was either the planesgorger,” Warrior said, “or her, and I’d much rather it be her that took its power.”

“Seconded,” Cecil said. “Vaan, ______ is much more responsible and reasonable than you know. She’s attached to Vayne because they share an emotional history. She and I did not remember each other, and neither did she nor Warrior recall their own meeting. But Vayne did, and he took responsibility for her like he said he would.”

“I still can’t believe it,” Noctis said. “Her memories are gone? How much is she missing?”

“We’re not sure,” Warrior said. “She left before we could discern it.”

“Did she- did she… mention anything about her home world?”

“Other than being taken from it?”

“Yeah.”

“No, I don’t believe so.”

“You sure? Nothing about it… being… _gone?”_

“Gone?” Cecil asked, shocked. “Her home world is gone?”

“...Not really my place to say, but yeah. She’s been super depressed for the past week. Hardly leaves her room.”

Cecil, Warrior, and Vaan all exchanged various, worried glances.

“She seemed the same as I last met her,” Cecil said. “That must be what she’s missing.”

_“Dammit.”_

 

“Mog, are you sure you can’t sense her?”

“Kupo… She’s really hard to find, even with all that power coming off her, kupo… When I was separated from everyone, I had been trying to find her.”

“What about Vayne?” Noctis asked. “Can you find him?”

Mog reached out with the power Materia had granted him.

“They must be inside a Torsion, kupo,” he said. “But my light sensing abilities only go so far…”

“It was worth a try,” Cecil said. He glanced at Noctis. “I’m sure we’ll find them, Noct. And while he might have his share of flaws, I’m sure Vayne wouldn’t let any harm come to her.”

“He better not,” Noctis growled.

“Noctis?” a female voice said. He turned around. It was the green haired girl ______ had made friends with. “Is that really you?”

“Oh, uh, hey…”

_What was her name again?_

“Sorry.”

She giggled. “It’s fine. I’m Terra.”

“You were ______ 's friend, right? Along with the… cat girl.”

“Y’shtola.”

Terra came closer.

“You must be worried about her. I am, too.”

“Yeah,” Noct said, rubbing his neck. “I heard she got herself in some deep shit…”

“The others said she seemed fine the last time they saw her. As much as Vaan and his friends distrust Vayne, I think he really cares about her.”

“You think so?” Cecil said. “That was also my conclusion.”

“And mine,” Warrior added. “He dropped his fists when she confronted him during our battle.”

“I just don’t want her getting hurt,” Noctis said. “We’re- She and I have this weird connection. And we’re both reckless. It doesn’t sound like Vayne’s all that keen on stopping her from doing something stupid.”

“That is because she is an unstoppable force, Noctis. She had vowed her neutrality and interfered when she couldn’t take the fighting anymore.”

“I understand her power,” Cecil said almost grimly. “Being a warrior of both the light and the dark is no easy burden. Sometimes it causes us to make rash decisions. But understand our hearts are in the right place.”

“But she’s _not_ a _warrior._ No matter how much power she has, it doesn’t guarantee she’ll know what to do with it. Hell, I know for a fact it _terrifies_ her.”

“She was made to be a weapon, kupo…” Mog said suddenly. “All that light, all the dark…”

“It was forced into her,” Cecil finished. “None of us like it, I promise you. I wish there was a way we could revert it somehow.”

“A weapon?” Noctis said in disbelief. “A weapon for _what?”_

“That would be your own to answer,” Warrior said. “We know not of your world.”

Noctis gave a smileless laugh. “That’s… That’s bullshit…”

“What is?”

“It’s like some kind of sick joke. She was designed as the weapon… But for some reason, it’s _me_ fighting to protect _her.”_

 

She had been quiet for a very long time. Granted, both of them had their long bouts of silence. But Vayne knew her curiosity often got the better of her. She hadn’t asked him anything in well over an hour. He let her think, but he wasn’t sure if she should stay in her thoughts for much longer. Her eyes were empty, their beautiful color almost dulled. He did, of course, have the option of prying, but he didn’t want her to be any more upset than she already had been.

They were inside yet another Torsion. Vayne wasn’t sure where to take them. The castle was a good option. Surely there were bedrooms she could rest in. But then… they had to hurry to the Crystal Core of Darkness. His heart was torn. Should he work to help her emotional and mental wellbeing or should he continue to look for a way to save Ivalice?

_“It’s not the event that matters, it’s how it affects individual people that makes a difference.”_

_Insufferable woman, saying something that makes sense._

If he destroyed this world, how would it affect the others? Not Materia’s warriors; he hardly gave a damn about them except for _______ 's sake lest she argue with him again. But she had been right: if he disappeared, what would happen to Archadia? What would happen to Larsa without his guidance? He couldn’t bear the thought of everything they had worked for falling through and crashing and burning.

She stumbled. He immediately turned his attention back to the present. Her eyelids covered half her eyes. She swayed slightly as they kept walking. She was practically falling asleep on her feet. Then she shook her head to wake herself up.

“I suppose we should find you somewhere to rest,” Vayne suggested.

“No, no, I’m good,” she protested. “I’m fine. Let’s keep going.”

He sighed. “If you keep going the way you are now, you’ll end up hurting yourself.”

“What about the core?”

“I’ll leave you someplace safe and continue the search.”

She thought it over. “You don’t need me for anything?”

“I’m not abandoning you now.”

“No, that’s not- I mean, I know you’re more than capable…”

...Was she… blushing?

“...But still, what if you get hurt?”

“Then I’ll come straight back.”

She looked up at him with wide, innocent eyes. He swallowed.

“You promise?” she asked sleepily. He brought his fist to his heart and nodded.

“You have my word.”

“Okay, then.”

_Thank the stars._

The Torsion opened back into the world. ______ and Vayne stepped back into the castle they had been in earlier. They were on the second floor, near the library. If Vayne remembered correctly, there were several hallways of bedrooms up there. He let her lead him to whichever one she wanted. It didn’t take long. She chose the second from the left in the right corridor from the staircase. It had a green and black theme.

Slowly, she stripped off her jacket, her shoes, and then her glasses, which she placed on the nightstand. Then she pulled the intricate comforter and dark green sheets back and flopped down.

“Oh my god,” she whispered. Vayne lifted a brow. “This is the softest bed I’ve ever had the privilege of lying on. It’s so _cushy.”_

She gently pulled the covers over her and tucked herself in so only her head was peeking out. Her eyes peered up at him innocently, half lidded in her exhaustion.

“You look cozy,” he said. She grinned sleepily. He was then surprised by tears making an appearance.

“Will you stay?” she asked quietly. “At least until I fall asleep?”

He dipped his head deeply in a nod. “Of course.”

It didn’t take her long to fall into dreams. He wished there was a way for him to take away any night terrors she might be plagued with. He could, at least, ward the room to make sure nothing and nobody came in. It took him a few minutes, but once a shimmering glamour had rested around the walls, he was satisfied with his work.

“I trust you’re asleep now?”

She didn’t answer. He pulled the covers further over her and opened a Torsion. He’d do his best to return before she woke this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good news!!! Vayne’s event in Opera Omnia starts this Thursday!! :D :D  
> You can probably guess how _fucking_ excited I am~!


	49. Of All the Places and Of All the People...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the universe decides to toy with Reader even more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> STOP!!! Important Note!!!  
> Okay, now that I’ve got your attention: this chapter contains references to a work of a friend of mine’s. You know her as Pippiuscattius. She comments sometimes. Anyway, she has a short series over on her account where Reader/OC is someone with a special power to visit other universes. This causes her to befriend Sam, Dean, and Castiel from the Supernatural world. She and Castiel make an appearance in THIS chapter because I have absolutely no self control.  
> So if you’re a SPN fan, I recommend checking her stories out. She’s a fantastic writer with a heart of gold :D (she is the Sam to my Dean)  
> So read on! You have been told.

Something had changed in Vayne after my full mental break down. He was still as hardened as ever, but his demeanor towards me had begun to differ. He was more attentive, his gaze softening just the slightest when he voiced his concerns. It was a nice change, but I couldn’t help but wonder if he was getting ready to leave me behind. I wouldn’t blame him if he did, but I was terrified of being alone. It was my worst fear.

I recalled the Melina’s words from my tarot reading.

_“Someone you’re close with feels that same deep connection. . . . ...But perhaps… It’s more than one person?”_

Did she mean Vayne? I wished I could find her again and ask. Noctis was clearly the first person, though, after what Luna had told us. ...Luna...

_No, don’t think about that._

_I can’t believe I’m the last one. The last human from Earth._

_Don’t think about it._

_I’m all alone. Everyone I know is gone…_

_Mom, Dad…_

_Stop._

_Laura, Pippi…_

_I said stop._

Tears welled up again. I was tired of crying.

_Lukas, Sammy…_

_STOP._

_Everyone else…_

I sniffed and brought a hand up to wipe at my eyes. How long had I been asleep? Was Vayne back? I opened my eyes right as a Torsion opened. In stepped Vayne, who looked drained. I guess he hadn’t found anything. I stayed in place, watching him with dull eyes. He waited a moment with closed eyes before walking over to me.

“I hope you weren’t waiting long,” he said softly. He looked just as tired as I felt.

“I just woke up,” I croaked. He nodded in approval.

“Good. It’s been about an hour and a half, I believe. Did you sleep well?”

I shrugged. “Dreams are better than my own thoughts.”

“I would assume so.”

“Why’s the room glowing?”

“I warded it so nothing would harm you whilst I was away.”

“Thank you.”

He moved to lean against the bed, his back to me.

“Find anything?”

“Several of Spiritus’ warriors have made deals with Materia’s to assist them when they need it. It would seem our goals will end up aligning with theirs soon.”

“So we’re… _not_ destroying the world?”

“I’m not sure. Without the second crystal core, we have nothing else to do but gather more information. I’m thinking perhaps that scavenger hunt we stumbled across might hold some secrets worth knowing.”

“Oh, okay! That sounds fun.”

“Still…” His gaze fell on me. “How are you feeling? If you need more rest, don’t hesitate to tell me.”

“...You’re…”

_Are you sweet or looking for an opportunity?_

“You’re not gonna leave me, are you…?”

He situated himself to face me, confusion evident on his face.

“Do you really think I would?” he asked. I looked down and grasped the rune on the necklace Noctis had given me.

“I just don’t want to lose anyone else… I know I might be annoying and kind of a hindrance, but… Um… Hmm. You… You’re nice to me and it… Um… It just… means a lot right now.”

He was quiet for a moment, fueling my suspicions. Fear kept me from glancing at him. I continued to fiddle with necklace and the sheets. When he exhaled, I dared to face him.

“Do you really think of yourself that way?” he muttered. “Do you think my opinion of you so low?”

Guilt settled on my shoulders. My eyes fell to my lap. I’d said something wrong. He didn’t want me to talk like this. I should be quiet.

A tear fell. Dammit.

“Please don’t leave me…” I whispered pitifully. He sighed. I took it the wrong way. More tears welled up. I tried to wipe them away, but they just wouldn’t stop. He moved, standing, and I expected him not to do anything.

A hand lifted my chin, fingers gently coming in to wipe the tears away.

“Do you remember what I told you?” Vayne said softly. “About not giving up?”

I nodded, refusing to look him in the eye lest I break again.

“I meant what I said. I do not you find you weak, quite the opposite. Nor do I find you a hindrance, whatever you may believe. I am not a man who is used to caring for individuals, so I apologize if I have given you the impression that I would abandon you at a moment’s notice. I do not think you annoying, and while you do frustrate me at times, I do consider you a friend. With you, that is not something I take lightly, do you understand?”

I nodded.

_“Do you understand?”_

“Yes.”

“Good. Then there is nothing more to say.”

“But why me?”

“What do you mean?”

“Why… you said with me it’s not something you take lightly. So why am _I…_ the exception?”

“I can only imagine what you must be going through, how you must feel. Being on this forsaken planet gives me some idea, but the idea of not returning to Archadia is unthinkable to me. Were I told it was _destroyed,_ that _all of Ivalice_ had been destroyed, I…”

He looked conflicted, downcast suddenly.

“I cannot even _fathom_ how you’re still functioning. How you’re not frothing at the mouth and out for the Astrals’ _divine_ blood. If I were you, I’d want to tear everything they’d created apart, just as a start.”

“But they created Earth, apparently. And they destroyed it themselves.”

“It sounds to me as if they’re trying to _rid_ their worlds of humanity. Killing off one and then condemning the king of the second to death after putting the capital cities to ruin… I’m enraged just _thinking_ about it.”

He was, I could feel it. His arms were shaking as he tried to keep himself in check.

“It is an _injustice_ that must be _corrected._ Corruption _must_ be purged.”

I didn’t know what else to do besides wrap my arms around him again. It caught him off guard.

“Again with the hugging…”

“Thank you,” I murmured, voice muffled. He patted my shoulder. “It’s the thought that counts.”

“-there’s something in here,” said another voice. Vayne and I froze. It was coming from outside the door. “It’s warded, heavily, with magic I have never seen before.”

_That voice… It sounds familiar._

“You heard that, yes?” Vayne asked quietly. I nodded, slightly retracting my arms. He pulled away and approached the door. “Someone is outside.”

“Is it a manikin?” I asked. Another voice came from the outside, quieter and unintelligible.

“I don’t believe so. Their voices sound normal, from what I can gather.”

“...going to try removing it,” Gruff Voice said. “It will just take… a second…”

Vayne activated his own magic as a blue light began to pour in. His hands sparked and glowed with brilliant light. The wards he had placed strengthened. The blue light seeped back out.

“It’s fighting back. I may need to break down the door.”

“Fools,” Vayne muttered. “I plan for everything.”

“Is that… necessary?” said the second voice. My heart lurched.

“No. No, no, no. It can’t be…” I whispered. “Please, no. Not _here._ Not _now.”_

Vayne sent me a questioning look. He powered his wards again. Light illuminated the doorway, but it was not his own. Vayne fought it with all he had. His sword, Sephira, appeared then, but there were multiple copies of it circling him.

“It’s…” Gruff Voice strained. “Too… Strong…”

“Too strong for an angel?” Familiar asked.

“Of course not. I merely wish to not harm whatever’s inside lest it attack _us.”_

“Vayne, open the door,” I said. He glanced at me, teeth gritted. “They won’t let up.”

The light disappeared. Vayne exchanged a look with me, questioning my thought process. I nodded.

“Trust me.”

He sighed and stopped the circle of swords, though they did not dissipate. The wards dropped enough for the door to open slightly. Vayne stood guard. I slipped my glasses and jacket back on. The door opened a little more. My mouth dropped.

Standing there, right before my eyes, living and breathing, was an angel of the Lord…

...and my best friend from Earth.

 

“______…?”

I was frozen. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t move. My eyes were locked to the thin redhead in front me. She hadn’t changed at all since I last her saw a month ago, on our vacation to Italy and Greece. Thick, red glasses rested on her nose. She wore her thin, light pink hoodie and her Homestuck Rosemary T-shirt.

_She hasn’t changed a bit._

_Why is she here?!_

Luckily, Vayne was still functioning.

“I will give you ten seconds to explain yourselves,” he warned. “Who are you and what is it that you want?”

“My name is Castiel,” the man in a business suit and trench coat said. “And this is Laura. We somehow wound up wherever this is by accident.”

Vayne’s shoulders dropped slightly. “So you’re some of Materia’s warriors, then?”

“Uh, who?”

“Materia, the goddess in opposition to Spiritus. Or have you not met with the others yet?”

“I don’t understand…”

Castiel turned to Laura.

“Is this a reference I’m not getting?”

She shook her head, staring at me as I stared at her. Vayne glanced at me and then to her.

“Do you two know each other?” he asked. I nodded as she spoke.

“I know her in my universe,” she choked. “But this one is… I don’t know. It’s…”

Castiel patted her shoulder comfortingly. She was trying not to cry.

“She’s been missing for _weeks.”_

Vayne looked back to me. I stood slowly, not taking my eyes off Laura. I walked forward to stand in the middle of the room.

“Is it really you?” I asked in a whisper. “Please tell me it is.”

“You- so you…” she swallowed. “This version of you knows me, too?”

“What do you mean, ‘this version’? If I’ve been missing for weeks, then we’re from the same world.”

She shook her head. “No, that’s… That’s impossible. There’s no way you could-”

“Would I _really_ just leave everyone? Just like _that?_ Without any warning?”

She didn’t say anything. I waited patiently as Vayne and Castiel watched, both confused and wondering how to help.

“I… I guess not,” she said. “But… how are you _here?”_

 _“You’re_ asking _me,_ that?” I joked. “It’s a long story. We’ll explain everything.”

I closed the distance and hugged her. She instantly returned it.

_“I’ve missed you **so much,** Sammy.”_

She gasped lightly. “Dean…”

The tears rose up again, that tingling feeling resting in my nose as I tried not to cry and failed miserably.

“I think about you _everyday,”_ I whispered. “I miss everyone _so much. It hurts.”_

“We miss you, too,” she croaked. “You have no idea how relieved I am…”

“I don’t want to let go.”

“Should we give them a moment?” Castiel asked awkwardly.

“Forgive me, but I’d rather not leave her alone,” Vayne said, eyeing the angel bitterly.

“Of course.”

I slowly detracted myself from Laura. Looking over her, I shook my head.

“There’s no way,” I said. “There’s _no way._ It _can’t_ be you.”

“What- what do you mean? What happened in your world?”

I choked on the growing lump in my throat. I couldn’t say it. I couldn’t tell her what happened. What was I supposed to do? Vayne cleared his throat.

“That is a sensitive subject,” he said professionally. “However, we _can_ provide you with a summary of our situation.”

“Is that _Castiel?”_ I asked. She grew flustered.

“Oh, uh, yeah,” she said. “Cas, this is ______. She’s also a fan of the show. ______, this is Cas.”

“Hi.” I waved at him. He did the same, but his wave shook awkwardly. “Usually I’d fangirl more, but I’m emotionally exhausted, so…”

“Understandable,” he said. I couldn’t help but smile.

“How do you know _Castiel?”_ I asked Laura. She averted her gaze.

“I… can’t… tell you.”

“What? Why not?”

“It’s confidential,” Castiel said. I blinked at him. “It’s a very long story.”

“O-oh, okay…”

I must have looked really downtrodden because Laura was quick to say, “I really wish I could tell you, though. It’s just… I’ll get in trouble if I do.”

“Gotcha. So… Oh!”

I moved over to Vayne.

“Laura, Cas, this is Vayne Solidor, my friend. Vayne, this is Castiel, an angel of the Lord, and my best friend from Earth, Laura. She’s like my little sister.”

“Is that why you called her ‘Sammy’?” Castiel asked. I nodded.

“An _angel?”_ Vayne questioned, skeptical. “Really?”

“He’s good,” I said. “He’s part of Team Free Will. He’s not going to try to get us to do things.”

“Hmm…”

“You said you had information?” Castiel asked. “We don’t… know exactly why it is we’re here. Or how we got here.”

I gestured to the round table with four chairs in the corner.

“Sit down,” I said. “You’re not gonna believe this.”

 

“So you’re saying we got pulled here by an interdimensional goddess?”

Vayne and I nodded.

“And…”

Laura looked at me.

“You _destroyed_ part of the world???”

“Uh, well,” I said, scratching my head, “‘s’not like I had a choice.”

“You _did_ have a choice,” Vayne corrected. “You chose to act instead of letting the beast take the crystal’s power.”

I shrugged. “Sounds like a no-brainer to me.”

“Why am I not surprised?” Laura said exasperatedly. Vayne lifted a brow.

“I am aware of her self-destructive tendencies,” he said. “But… Has something similar occurred before…?”

Laura shook her head. “No, but she’s always had this weird, kind of joking apocalypse fever.”

 _“Super_ hyped for the apocalypse,” I said with finger guns. My smile became strained. “Or at least that’s what I used to say.”

“Did one happen on _your_ Earth, too?” Castiel inquired curiously.

 _“As_ we were saying,” Vayne cut in, “Materia’s warriors are currently roaming through the dark world as we speak. You were most likely brought here by her, so I can take you to them if you so wish.”

Laura had started to catch on to us hiding something.

“Where have you been?” she asked me. “If you’ve been missing for weeks on your world, too…”

“That’s… a long story,” I said solemnly. “A _very_ long story that I can tell you when we have this figured out.”

“...Okay. If you’re sure…”

“Let’s just say I got dumped onto another world by some inconsiderate gods who want me dead.”

_“What?!”_

I grinned slightly, hoping she’d think I was joking. No way was I telling her what Pryna had shown me.

 _“Please_ tell me you’re joking!”

“I _did_ get dumped onto another world,” I said. “And met some really nice guys who are like my brothers now.”

“So… You’re not alone?”

“No. I’m good.”

“Okay… You worried me there for a second.”

I glanced at Vayne, who seemed conflicted at my aversion to telling her the truth.

“This… Materia,” Castiel said. “She wants us to stop this world from being destroyed by a _planesgorger,_ of all things.”

“Yes,” Vayne answered. “I’d always advise against doing as the gods tell you to do, but there isn’t any other way to get back to our homes.”

He looked at me.

“Ah, well… Most of us, anyway.”

I shrugged again. He sent me a disapproving glance. Castiel and Laura also exchanged one, but it was uneasy and hard to read.

“I actually have a way of getting home,” Laura said slowly. “But like I said, I can’t tell you about it, and I wouldn’t know how to get everyone else home either.”

“Then I suggest you take whatever way you can,” Vayne said smoothly.

“But what about the planegorger?” Castiel said. “If that thing grows any stronger, it will devour _everything.”_

“I am aware. It is why we are on our own quest to rid the universe of it. You should go home whilst you can.”

A thought struck me. Ramza and Vaan were from the same world, but at two different points in time. What if Laura was here from just a couple weeks ago, before Earth… Before it…

“Don’t go,” I whispered. “Please don’t go.”

“They must,” Vayne said. “If I had a way to return to Ivalice, I would.”

“I’m not leaving until you tell me where you’ve been,” Laura said to me.

“This has been a source of anxiety for her lately,” Castiel added. “She’s been worried sick.”

I sighed. “Just… promise me you won’t… Please just believe me, okay?”

She nodded. “We’re on a different planet. I don’t think I have any room to deny it.”

So my story began. Vayne had heard bits and pieces, but the whole story had him on edge. He hated what the gods had put us through, what they’d put _me_ through. And he didn’t much like Niflheim, either. Then again, who did?

Laura, on the other hand, hardly believed my accounts of learning magic until I demonstrated. Then she became obsessed with it, asking me all manner of questions from what my limitations were to my favorite parts about using it is. As for the story itself, she was just as in awe as Vayne, but for different reasons.

“So these gods just _yeeted_ you into a _modern fantasy world?”_ she said excitedly.

“They what?” Vayne and Castiel chorused.

“Yep,” I said, “but it gets worse.”

“Right, sorry,” Laura said sheepishly. I smiled.

“It’s fine. The majority of it might be pretty depressing, but there were good moments.”

I held up the rune necklace.

“Like this. Noctis gave me this.”

“The Norse rune Othala,” Castiel recognized. “Interesting.”

“What does that mean?” Laura asked.

“It stands for family and inheritance. Noctis must think highly of you to consider you that close to him.”

“He’s my brother,” I said proudly. “And I have more on that subject once we get to Altissia. So…”

I told them about Costlemark and scared the hell out of Pippi with my second and third brushes with death. Then I explained how I met Vayne and our encounter with the planesgorger. The tale of Altissia reached a peak at the altar. Castiel hadn’t said much, but Laura got more and more worried about my well being.

“Is using that much power good for you?” she asked when I finished what had happened with Ardyn and Ignis.

“I don’t know,” I said. “I could hardly move after it, though.”

“Once again,” Vayne said, “your abilities overwhelm you. You should use them sparingly when you aren’t training. Building up endurance is a must.”

“I agree with Vayne,” Castiel said. “I may not heal the same way you do, but it still uses up my grace and can be tiring if used too much.”

I lowered my head like a dog being scolded.

“Okay,” I said. “I’ll try to be careful.”

“So what happened with Ignis?” Laura asked. “Is he alright?”

My story came to a close as I hesitantly told them about Noctis’ and my soul bond and what Luna had told me. Only, I couldn’t finish it myself. Vayne had to fill in what he could from what I’d already told him.

“Earth is…” Laura gasped, horrified. “But- I was just _there.”_

“I _know,”_ I said, choking my back my emotions. “Please don’t go back. _Please.”_

“But- what about-? That’s just- _Why?”_

I shook my head. “I don’t know. I don’t know…”

Laura looked to Castiel. “Cas, we… we need to check to make sure.”

“Right,” the angel replied. “If what she said is true, you can always stay with us.”

“Thank you, Cas. I mean it.”

“You mean too much to us, all of us, for us to not do such a thing for you.”

I stared at the table. The old wood had been polished. It shone in what little light came in. I could make out all the little lines and dents. I traced the edge with my finger.

“I would get out while you still can,” Vayne said to my friend. “This is no place for someone who cannot fight.”

“He’s right,” Castiel agreed. He looked to Vayne. “Tell this ‘Materia’ to think before acting next time. If something happened, if she got hurt…”

“I’m fine, Cas,” Laura said, laughing.

“Still… I’d never forgive myself if something awful occurred and I could have prevented it.”

Vayne glanced at me. I met his gaze and he nodded. My eyes widened.

_Oh. I see. So he **does** care about me. I mean, why else would he comfort me and help me take care of myself?_

I gave him a small smile. That satisfied him and he turned back to our (his) new friends.

“You’ll be leaving, then?” he asked.

“We should,” Castiel responded. “Laura, maybe find a place they can’t see?”

“Wait,” I said, voice cracking. “You’re leaving? Just like that? You won’t even tell me what you’ve been up to? How you met _Castiel?”_

“W-well, I already told you I can’t…”

“Why _not?”_

“It’s a bound contract,” Castiel explained. “If she tells you, she will be in a world of trouble. Again.”

“Again???”

I sighed. This wasn’t _fair._ This- I couldn’t- I couldn’t even _comprehend_ how unfair this was. Was this a sick joke? Did the universe just go ‘here’s your best friend from Earth, which was destroyed, but you can’t know anything about her latest shenanigans because reasons’?

“Um, but…” she spoke, voice wavering slightly at my betrayed expression. “Sam, Dean, Cas, and I went to Dominica last year.”

“You said you were with friends, with Leah,” I countered frustratedly. Had she _lied_ to me?

“That’s what I told everyone! I couldn’t exactly say ‘here’s Castiel and the Winchesters.’”

I bit back any disbelief I had. Her reasoning was fine, I supposed. “Okay, fair enough…”

“Apologies,” Vayne cut in, “but this hardly strikes me as fair. Contract or no, she has believed you _dead_ for the last week, at the very least. She has told you what has happened to her. Does she not deserve to know what really has been going on?”

“Vayne…”

“I’m not entirely sure our dimensions are lining up,” Castiel said analytically. “There are some similarities, but there are also some holes I’ve noticed. I don’t think, and this is just my observation, that they are from the same universe. This world we are in now gathers people from worlds over, you said. It is entirely plausible that interdimensional travel is in the works as well.”

Vayne muttered something about that being a possibility with slightly gritted teeth. I had a feeling he didn’t like an _angel_ of all things telling him off.

“Anyway,” I said, still ignoring the heartbreak in my soul, “how was the trip?”

“Oh, um,” Laura thought, “it was really fun. Cas made Dean a nest and Sam found a dog.”

“Sam, I get,” I said with a grin. “But… a nest?”

“OH! You’ll _never_ guess what happened about a year before that.”

She was completely energized. My grin widened as she bounced excitedly in her seat.

“What?” I prompted. The biggest, dorkiest smile lit up her entire face as she tried to calm herself.

“I made Destiel canon. Well, not exactly, BUT: I did get _this_ Cas and Dean together!”

I narrowed my eyes. Was she joking? Should I believe her? I glanced at Castiel. He smiled a little at the memory. I raised an eyebrow at him.

“It is true,” he said. My eyes widened. “We were married not long after our trip to Dominica.”

“They’d been dating a year before then,” Laura clarified. I slammed my hands down on the table, earning disdainful look from Vayne.

 _“You didn’t,”_ I said with a smile as equally dorky as hers. _“You **didn’t!”**_

_“I did!”_

My hands flailed around the table’s surface, looking for something to hold on to as my heart danced a joyful jig. Both Laura and I giggled like we were insane.

“You must be so damn _happy,”_ I beamed. _“They_ must be so damn happy! And _married?”_

“Chuck himself officiated it.”

_“YOU MET GOD?!”_

“Are…” Vayne swallowed as Laura fervently told me what details she could concerning meeting Chuck. “Are they… of sound mind?”

“I wonder that often, myself,” Castiel muttered. “I’m used to this from Laura, but… now there’s _two_ of them.”

A few minutes later and we had calmed down significantly. We smiled still.

“Alright,” I said. “That’s good enough for me. Sounds like you’ve had quite the adventures. I gotta admit, though, I’m a bit jealous.”

“Aww…” Laura said. “I really wish I _could_ take you to meet Sam and Dean…”

“Eh, I’ll live. I’ve got Noctis and the others.”

I glanced at the regal man sitting next to me.

“And Vayne.”

He blinked at me. The mood grew back into what it had been once more. My heart ached at the thought of letting go so soon. I did my best to ignore it.

“As much as I hate to break your reunion,” Castiel said, standing awkwardly. “We shouldn’t stay here longer than we should.”

“You’re…” I bit my lip, trying to keep tears from welling up. “You’re leaving already?”

“Well, I mean…” Laura swallowed. I stood with her. “You said it’s dangerous here, so…”

“But I- I can’t- No…”

_No, please. Please don’t leave me. Not again. I can’t take much more._

The lump in my throat returned in full force. A hand placed itself on my shoulder.

“Sometimes it is best to let go,” Vayne said to me, “for things to get better. _If_ her Earth is gone, she still has someone to look after her, just as you do.”

My heartbroken look wouldn’t diminish. I kept staring at Laura, wishing I could take her with me and at the same time, knowing I shouldn’t.

“______?” she said quietly. With a small sob, I threw my arms around her again. The gesture was returned.

“I don’t want you to go,” I whispered. _“Not right when I got you back.”_

“I know… I… It’s… _so good…_ to see you again.”

“You, too. I’m not going to let go for a minute, by the way.”

“That’s fine with me.”

Behind us, Vayne and Castiel occupied themselves with quiet conversation.

“So you’re an _angel?”_ Vayne inquired. Castiel nodded. “And… do you do _everything_ the gods demand of you? Even if it isn’t right?”

“There is only one God,” Castiel explained. “My Father created everything, and soon after that, he left.”

“And… Who is it that rules the heavens, then?”

“Archangels did, for a while. I _did_ used to obey the higher angels as I didn’t know anything else. But then I learned that everything was not as it seemed and rebelled to save the Earth from the Apocalypse.”

“I see… A very interesting tale. Tell me, what happens when you disobey?”

“Punishment, torture, imprisonment. It depends on how horrible the crime is. Humans get off a lot easier than angels as we know more than they do.”

Oh dear.

 _“Do_ they, now?” Vayne said, his voice starting to spark with anger. “And why would that be?”

“It is just the way things are. I have been alive for millennia, and there are still things I do not know. But of heaven’s and the world’s inner workings, that I do know.”

“And why has man not received such knowledge? Are they not the ones who make history? The ones who worship this god, who created them? Do they not receive anything in return?”

“Um, Vayne?” I called. “I can explain Christianity later. I was raised Catholic.”

“So you answer to a god who expects you to give and only takes?”

“I told you,” Castiel said, now slightly angered. “God left a long time ago. And though I have met him within the past year, he still stays away. So I don’t exactly follow his orders other than to love humanity as he asked us to do. All the other angels lost sight of that. All of them, but me.”

Vayne stood there for a moment, stunned.

“What I did, I did for Sam and Dean and for the world they love. I would not _hesitate_ to do it again, even if it means making the same catastrophic mistakes.”

Laura and I had detached ourselves a minute ago. We watched their conversation warily. I was worried Vayne would anger Castiel to the point that they’d start fighting.

“Sometimes dirtying our hands is necessary,” Vayne said. “But it is for our people that we do it, as long as they are safe and prospering. Mistakes or not, you did what you could. In the end, the result will have meant more than the means to achieve it.”

“If that’s what you believe,” Castiel said. “But you don’t know anything about me.”

“True, but I, too, have done what was necessary for my people. If it includes a massacre for the sake of the masses, then so be it. If no one else does it, I _will._ For Archadia. For Ivalice.”

“Then I suppose we have something in common.”

Vayne nodded, glad that hadn’t ended poorly. Hearing a divine being claiming love for humanity and how he defended it with his life didn’t change his views, exactly, but it did give him a new perspective from a different world.

He looked to me.

“We should let them depart,” he said. My head and shoulders dropped.

“Do they have to?” I asked.

“You know they must.”

I gave Laura one last hug as they moved out the door. As I did so, I told Castiel that it was nice to meet him.

“Same to you,” he said. “And… I _am_ really sorry about your Earth. I wish we could have been there to stop it.”

“You saved your own world,” I told him. “That’s enough for me. Say hi to Sam and Dean for me?”

“We both will.”

I looked back to Laura. “Please be careful. And don’t do anything stupid. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do and- make sure to stay with Sam and Dean when you’re with them and…”

She laughed slightly. “_______, I’ll be fine. Really.”

“I know, but- I just- You- Just remember, no business with demons and always keep some salt on hand. And also remember…”

I made myself look her in the eye.

“I’ll never forget any of you. Not again, not ever. I promise.”

When they closed the door, I felt empty once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *pours entire bag of salt into wound* Here ya go!! Enjoy!!
> 
> By the way, the idea for a crossover between our two fics was about 90% my idea. I thought it would be fun to hurt poor Reader _just_ a little more.  
> So please be kind.
> 
> Also, whether Laura and Reader are from the same universe is entirely up to you~!


	50. Fidelitas sempiterna

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The scavenger yields little results but emotions are felt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “Everlasting (Undying) fidelity”
> 
> Chapter 50!!! A MILESTONE!!!  
> Thank you all so much for continuing to read this mess of a story of mine. It means so much to me that I’ve been able to continue for this long and that is all thanks you~ I do hope you still enjoy what I’ve written. Thank you very much again 😊

I walked with Vayne despondently through the halls of the castle. Every so often he’d glance at me, but he respectfully kept quiet. I fiddled with the chess piece and papers in my pocket. What could I say that let him know I needed to be distracted right now? That I needed to talk and think about anything other than home?

“Laura was her name, yes?” Vayne answered my question in a less than welcome way. That was the last thing I wanted to think about lest I break down _again._

“Yep,” I said shortly.

“It sounds like my brother’s name. And with the way you worried about her…”

“What’s your brother’s name?”

_Please take my mind off this._

“Larsa,” Vayne answered fondly.

“They do sound similar,” I agreed. I said nothing else. He caught my cue to leave the subject for a while. We continued our stroll in silence until we came to the stairwell and headed downwards. At the bottom, we headed a different direction than we went the last time we were here. I couldn’t help but wonder if what had just happened was a dream.

_Was that really her? From a different universe?_

_Stop thinking about it._

_But I miss her so much. And I miss Mom and Dad, too…_

_Please just stop._

_And the lake... The river valley…_

I sniffed and quickly wiped away the newly forming tears.

“Vayne?” I asked quietly.

“Hmm?”

“Can… Can you… Can you tell me about Archadia?”

“...What would you like to know?”

“Anything. Everything.”

The gaze I sent him was a plea for help. His own softened a bit. Then he looked back ahead and began to tell me about his nation and its capital, Archades. His pride came through in his passionate explanations. He was incredibly proud of being from an esteemed empire, and he was even prouder of being a son of its royal family. He told me, very passionately, that no matter what it took, he would do anything, and I mean _anything,_ to preserve his family’s legacy. If he had to dirty his hands, so be it. As long as his brother was safe and his lineage was secure, he would do it. I didn’t doubt him for a second.

Apparently, since we had last met, Vayne had ascended the ranks and now held the position of emperor. My eyes had widened at that, but he told me I needn’t treat him any differently. However, he did leave out the details of _how_ that came about. I assumed he had been elected like he had told me. But, that also meant that his father had passed away. I felt a bit bad for him for that. On the other hand, he seemed to like the idea of being emperor, and I was sure he’d be good at it, however, he confessed that he agreed with his father and some of the other members of the government that his brother should be the one to take up the title. He even had plans to remove the corruption of the political system and at the same time remove Larsa’s political opponents. In fact, many of these plans were already in the works.

I’d never really been one for politics. Like Vayne, I also loathed any corruption in its works and the drama that resulted both intrigued me and repulsed me. But the passion with which Vayne spoke of what he was doing and planned to do had me hanging on his every word. I supposed it helped that we came from different planets, so my level of curiosity was already pretty high. I had a feeling Vayne didn’t usually speak of such plans to anyone. I hoped this was as therapeutic for him as it was for me. He struck me as a very private person and I appreciated his willingness to give me insight into his own mind when I needed a distraction. Although… It wasn’t like there was anything I could do to thwart his plans. Not that I’d want to, anyway.

_I can’t believe I’m friends with an **emperor.** How crazy is that? My life has become **so wild** in these last few weeks, damn…_

By the time his passion laced speech ended, we had reached the front entrance of the castle. Large, double oak doors towered over us. I had no idea how we were supposed to open it. Luckily, Vayne was used to such extravagance and showed me the best way to pry the doors open on our own.

“Thank you,” I said as we stepped out into the somewhat cool air. “For distracting me.”

“Of course,” Vayne said. “However, it still baffles me how you aren’t completely dysfunctional.”

We turned right into a cute garden courtyard. A fountain of a woman standing amidst sea foam rested in the center with paths branching out to different patches of various beautiful flowers, some of which I didn’t recognize.

“Eh.” I shrugged. “I like to ignore my problems until they become too much for me to bear. _Then_ I break down and can’t function.”

“Again,” Vayne said, “How that isn’t happening now is still incomprehensible. Is that why you chose to forget?”

I shook my head. “I purposely meant for it to be temporary. I just…”

My gaze averted to the side.

“I just wanted to remember what having hope felt like.”

We came to a standstill. Vayne was, as per usual, unreadable. His eyes bore into me like a drill. I refused to meet them. We stayed like that for maybe a minute.

“You know,” he finally said, one hand on his hip. “My offer still stands.”

I managed a quick glance at him and then back down.

“It is reasonable, generous. I’m very capable and used to acting on my own accord. I have _never_ offered someone a comfortable place at my side.”

_At… ‘At his side’? He wants me to be his equal?_

_But what about Noctis?_

_He’ll understand._

_But does he know he has to **die?** That **I** have to die? I can’t just let him take my place-_

_You know he’ll insist that he does._

“I’ll think about it,” I said, quiet and expressionless. Vaybe blinked in surprise. He thought I’d make excuses again.

“Very well,” he responded, resigned. “Your unwavering loyalty is to be admired, at the very least.”

“Same to you.”

I examined the fountain statue after looking around at the numerous species of flowers.

“Hey, I think this is Venus,” I said, pointing to the fountain. “Aphrodite is her Greek counterpart. She was born from sea foam after- well, I’ll spare you the details. But this might be what we’re looking for!”

Vayne joined me by the fountain. We searched around it for any slips of paper or clues. Engraved into the stone in the water on the other side was a Latin phrase I knew I had seen before.

“‘In wine, there is truth’,” Vayne translated. “And now we must find the wine cellar.”

My shoulders dropped.

“But this place is _huge,”_ I protested, extending my arm and gesturing to the entire castle.

“Wine _cellar,”_ Vayne emphasized. “It would be on the lowest floor, in or near the kitchens.”

“...Oh. Uh, right. I don’t see castles often, so…”

“Come, let us find it.”

_I keep forgetting our class difference, even though he’s so… regal and elegant. Gotta remember he’s probably lived in a place like this his whole life._

That thought was intimidating. I was travelling with the sovereign of an _empire._ Hell, he was the fucking _emperor._ Our lives, both now and growing up, were very, very different from each other. I wondered how they compared. Were they at all similar?

_Surely they must be, since you share a few ideals._

_Ugh, let’s stay away from politics for now._

We entered the castle once again. Opening the door was a bit more difficult this time, but we managed to crack it open enough to slip in. The red and gold interior hadn’t changed. I waited for Vayne make a move.

“I admit,” he said, arms crossed, “I’ve never been in the kitchens in Archades’ palace before… That being said, I’ve no clue where to start looking.”

“You’ve never been in a kitchen before?” I asked, bewildered. He sent me a look that challenged ‘what of it?’. “Uh, okay. Bit weird. Buuuut… I don’t know much about castle planning, but maybe we should find the dining room first. The kitchen wouldn’t be too far from there, would it?”

“An astute observation.”

I perked up at his praise.

“I believe I found something of the sort during our last visit. This way.”

I followed him down the corridor to our left. We abandoned the light of the hallway chandelier for dimly lit sconces. The worn yet colorful red carpet stretched the whole length of the hall until it turned another right at the end. Vayne led the way along the left wall until we came to a set of thin, wooden doors. He opened them easily and we stepped inside.

A long table and many chairs had been pushed up against the wall. All of them were covered with white tarp and a layer of dust. The exquisite chandelier held both electric lights and candles as well as sparkling crystals hanging down from its layers. The walls were a beige with darker gold trim. About three-fourths of the way down was a strip of mahogany that ran all around the room and under that, the wall had been painted a deep red.

“Wow!” I said, walking out to the middle of the room. My voice echoed slightly. “It’s so _big!_ People actually eat in here?”

Vayne watched me with amusement.

“Yes,” he said, coming to stand next to me. “It is most likely, however, that this room is reserved for larger gatherings. There must be a smaller room higher up for the family who lives here when there are no guests to entertain.”

My dropped in disappointment. “Oh, okay. Still cool, though. Hey, do you think there are any secret passageways?”

I drifted over to an uncovered table at the end of the room near the door. Two, long candles were at either end of it. Two big sconces had been situated on both sides, as well.

“If this was a real mystery, this would be a good place for an entryway for one.”

I fiddled with the candles and then with the lights.

“You are caught up in fiction,” Vayne said, shaking his head. “Were there a series of passages, they’d be for the maids and servants to traverse the castle swiftly as needed, not an elaborate coverup of some sort.”

I pouted. “The coverup would be cooler.”

Vayne led me out of the dining room by the arm before I got carried away with fictitious tropes. We walked down to the end of the corridor, where several entryways stood. To the right was a small staircase leading up. On the left was another staircase, but this one went down. Warmer air wafted up from it and drifted down the next hallway.

I pointed at the stairs on the left. “Underground is where cellar is.”

Vayne gave me an odd look. “Why, yes, it is.”

“We check?”

He nodded and we began the short descent.

“Your speech pattern has grown to be…” Vayne searched for the right wording, “even more simplified…”

“Autism brain says ‘be exceedingly obvious with the English lexicon so you can clarify whether or not this strategy of ours to pursue the scavenger hunt is too convoluted for you to comprehend’.”

“I suppose there was little point in commenting.”

 

The kitchen did indeed lie at the bottom of the staircase. It was probably the largest kitchen I’d ever seen. Several ovens were situated at the other end. Tables, stoves, and all manner of cooking stations filled the empty space between the ovens and us. Sacks and barrels of several different kinds of ingredients lined the walls and mostly empty spice jars filled the shelves. The musty scent of dust and burnt pans had my nose shriveling. This place had seen better days than the rest of the castle. Rust grew on all the pots and pans left out and mold and cobwebs shadowed the corners of the rooms. I felt the sudden need to justify this space.

“Most kitchens aren’t this… um…” I wracked my brain for the right word. “Decrepit.”

“I should hope not,” Vayne said. He eyed the doorway to our left. “That looks to be promising.”

It was a storage closet. Another door was to our right and barrels upons barrels and many, many boxes filled the rest of the space. A rickety, dusty table lied to the left. A single, grayed plate lied on it. A knife blade had been slipped through the forks prongs. I stared at it.

“Does this mean something?” I asked. Vayne came over to inspect the plate.

“Oh, dear,” he muttered amusedly. “It would appear someone did not enjoy their meal.”

I gave him a confused look.

“How did you get that from a _plate?”_ I asked. He raised a brow.

“Plate etiquette, of course,” he said, like it obvious.

“...There’s etiquette for _plates?”_

“Of course there is. Manners during meals are very important, especially when one has company.”

“But… Why a plate language? If someone didn’t like their meal, why not just say so…?”

Vayne gave me an incredulous look.

“Why say it _aloud_ when you can discreetly tell the chef?” he questioned. “I’ve certainly used it for second plates.”

“Second pla- The fuck is wrong with rich people?”

“Come now, there’s no need for such language and hostility-...”

“‘Hey do you want a second plate?’ No, I want to make up a _passive aggressive fork language_ so we can all _titter mockingly_ at that rube from the country who says he enjoyed the meal with his fucking _mouth.”_

I ended with a very deadpan look at Vayne. He observed me with an interesting expression for a moment.

And then he began chuckling. My own gaze turned into one of confused awe. His chuckles morphed into laughs.

“‘Passive aggressive fork language’,” he breathed. He raised a fist to his mouth and cleared his throat, regaining his composure. “I don’t believe I’ve _ever_ encountered someone so incredibly amusing as you.”

Heat flared up my cheeks.

“You…” I tapped my fingers together. “You think I’m funny…?”

“But of course,” Vayne said politely. “Unless that wasn’t your intention.”

“Oh, it was! I’m just glad you liked it instead of getting offended.”

“I may be well composed, but that does not mean I can’t enjoy a good joke.”

I smiled widely. “I’m glad you liked it. I prize myself on my sense of humor.”

This puzzled him. I asked why.

“You don’t prize yourself on your grasp of magic?” He countered. “Or your wide array of knowledge? Or your loyalty or kindness?”

My whole head felt like it was sitting by a lit fireplace. I probably looked like a faded tomato.

“O-oh, um…” I stuttered. How do I respond to so many compliments at once? “Hey, look, a door!”

I slipped around him to the door we had yet to open. When he didn’t follow, I turned back to Vayne. He had a troubled look on his face.

“You coming…?”

He shook his head. “You should not belittle yourself.”

“I don’t know how to handle compliments,” I said, opening the door and peering through the dark. A staircase led down. A sign on the right read ‘Vino.’ Must be the wine cellar we were looking for.

“That is not the problem at hand.”

“Then what is?”

“How you continuously _avoid_ talking about yourself. _Especially_ concerning your current mental conditions.”

“...I talk about myself all the time…?”

“You speak of your home, those you deem your friends, our current situation, and anything _but_ your innermost thoughts.”

“Why do you care about my inner problems? Not that I don’t appreciate it, but…”

I placed a foot on the first step.

“...Wouldn’t you rather… bother yourself with something else?”

Vayne stopped me by placing a hand on my shoulder and turning me. My sad, hopeless eyes met his.

“So, um, yeah… Let’s go.”

“_______.”

I averted my gaze. He brought it back with his other hand. The cloth of his white gloves was soft. I wanted to nuzzle it, but I refrained.

“May I… express my concerns?”

“Which concerns? There are a lot. You mean my home being gone or being here where there’s no history, or-?”

“_______, don’t. Don’t talk over me so you can’t hear.”

I tried looking to the side.

“Look at me.”

“No.”

“Please.”

I did so reluctantly. His gaze had softened considerably.

“Who was it that affected you so that you cannot find confidence in yourself?”

I froze. My eyes widened. He was digging too deep, and it scared me. An attractive man I was absolutely drawn to was showing _interest_ in my inner workings.

_And I was terrified._

I began to squirm.

“You’ve done enough for me,” I said frantically. “Why add my real emotions into it? Why do you care?”

“Because I-!” He sighed. Vayne’s arms dropped from me. A frustrated yet disappointed emotion flitted through his eyes. He closed them. “Perhaps you’re right. Maybe I am getting too attached.”

I blinked in surprise. “Attached?”

His eyes opened and bore into mine.

“It matters not,” he said coolly.

_Shit, shit, we’re losing him! Do something!!_

“A-Attach- You’re attached to… me?” I asked nervously. Vayne turned away. “Wait, I- I’m attached to me, too- no, wait, I mean, I’m attached to _you._ More than I should be. Um, I mean- Shit, uh…”

I grasped at my arm.

“Sorry…” I muttered. “I’m just… not really used to people… _asking_ about how I really feel… I panicked. Um, do you really… care about me?”

“Did you think that I don’t?” Vayne asked quietly. “Why on earth would I let you accompany me if I did not care for you?”

“That’s- that’s what- I mean, I wondered about that, but if you haven’t guessed by now, I’m _incredibly_ insecure…”

Vayne stepped closer. I could feel warmth coming from him. A weird kind of warmth I had never experienced before. One of a promise of protection. Of acceptance. Of unbridled loyalty and devotion. And… it was aimed at _me._

A hand tilted my chin up.

“You have no reason to be,” Vayne said softly.

“Thanks,” I murmured, “but that’s not going to cure my anxiety.”

“I don’t expect it to.”

“But, um…”

My sheepishness intensified.

“If I may ask…”

He nodded.

“Why… _do_ you keep me with you?”

A low hum left him.

“A good question,” he said. He made sure I stayed facing him. “I don’t exactly know, myself.”

“O-oh…”

“In truth… It worries me, how _connected_ I feel… How _open.”_

“Yeah, same. It’s different with Noctis. He’s my brother. But you… you’re… I don’t know.”

I did know, but I wasn’t going to tell him that just yet.

“When I first met you,” he began, “I didn’t think much of you. I was intrigued to a worrisome extent, but I wouldn’t go out of my way to learn more. And then you involuntarily showed your true emotions during our second meeting. Being an unwilling pawn sits well with no one. And our walk to the dome solidified that. Being taken without your _consent,_ with _no warning whatsoever…_ And what the gods did to you… You, who is so innocent and good hearted… Pure, untouched by the hatred of the cruelest things the worlds have to offer… Or so it seemed… I have this unswerving resolve to keep you safe.”

My eyes widened. Did he… just confess to wanting to _protect me?_

“This is starting to feel one-sided…” I muttered, feeling bad I couldn’t offer him anything in return. “How do I help _you?”_

“You don’t have to,” Vayne said. He pushed my hair back. “I am well put together, stable, consistent. Your whole life has just been turned upside down. You _need_ stability, protection. Somewhere safe to turn to when no one else offers. I am perfectly willing to be that source of comfort.”

The sting of salt met my eyes. Tears started to form.

“You…” I sniffed. “No, I couldn’t ask that of you…”

“I am _offering_ it _to_ you,” Vayne said insistently. “You are asking nothing of me. Simply accept, and should ever you need me, there I will be.”

“But you’re so busy. I can’t take you away from what you’re doing.”

He sighed. “You’re not listening.”

“Is this another way to get me to come with you?”

“No. _Listen_ to my words. It matters not what I’ll be doing when you call. If you call, I will come. I do not offer this to _anyone_ else. It is so uncharacteristic of me that it worries me greatly. I bend the knee to no one. But for you, I will at least extend my hand and allow you to join me, be it physically at my side or in spirit.”

I didn’t know what else to do but hug him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got the “passive aggressive fork language” thing from a Tumblr post about plate etiquette.  
> The scavenger hunt will continue~!


	51. In A Castle On An Island, There Lived A Scavenger Hunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The hunt continues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of my favorite chapters, tbh

I sneezed. The wine cellar was full of dust and dusty barrels. I’d never been in a wine cellar before. I wasn’t old enough to drink (just a year away) but even if I was, I still wouldn’t want anything to do with alcohol. I hated how it affected people, made them act ridiculously. How it caused to do unbelievable things they wouldn’t even _remember._ I _loathed_ the idea of not being consciously in control of myself.

And yet here I was in a wine cellar. It was dark. A small ring of candles hung from the ceiling but none of them were lit. I lit a flame in my palm and used it to see. I handed another to Vayne. All the barrels were on their sides and further into the room were shelves upon shelves of wine bottles, all ready to be drunk. It smelled like dust and moldy earth with a slight hint of grapes.

Nothing seemed to be out of the ordinary. We split up and explored opposite sections. I fiddled around with the bottles, pushing some aside to see if there was anything behind them. I recognized some of the labels from hearing my mother and her friends order at restaurants, but besides that, I didn’t see anything meaningful. I straightened back up, stretching my arms. I’d looked through all the shelves. Nothing.

_Better find Vayne, then._

He was inspecting the area behind the barrels. I came up behind him and glanced around his shoulder. There was a small desk against the wall in front of us. Vayne was pouring through an old, faded book with yellow pages and a collapsing spine.

“Whatcha got there?” I asked. He twitched slightly, like I’d startled him. “Sorry.”

“It’s a roster of some sort,” he answered. “The ink is worn. It’s hardly legible.”

“I haven’t an _ink-ling_ of what to do, then,” I said with the widest grin on my face. Vayne stared at me for a moment. Then he closed his eyes and the most resigned sigh I’d ever heard left him.

“Yes, well… Hopefully this is the penultimate step before we find whatever it is this hunt is leading us to.”

He gazed back at me. He wasn’t smiling, but his eyes were alight with amusement. It took me a second to realize what he was waiting for.

“...Oh!” I started giggling. _“Pen-_ ultimate-! I get it.”

He looked pleased with himself. Once I had stopped laughing, I looked at the roster he had found. It was full of various words and numbers. I noticed a list of last names and specific wines that must have been bought from them. As I read down the list, one in particular caught my eye. I pointed at it excitedly.

“Hey, that’s _my_ last name!” I said enthusiastically. Vayne looked over my shoulder to where I was pointing. “And there’re numbers. Three… And three hundred sixty four. That’s… a lot of wine.”

“That… might _not_ be how much wine they ordered,” Vayne deduced. “It looks like a room number. See?”

His own gloved hand pointed out the words next to 364.

“Vena Wing. It must be part of the castle.”

“Why _the fuck_ is my family staying in a castle? _Without me?”_

“Keep in mind this is most likely copied from wherever the gods found this place.”

“Oh. Right…”

My heart sank. There went that bit of hope.

“Ah, but still,” my friend scrambled to figure out how to cheer me up. “It is a clue.”

“Says who?” I asked. “It’s just a name in a book along with a bunch of other names.”

“Yes, but this is the only legible and noteworthy one.”

I scanned over the other names. Vayne was right. If the names could be read (and most were smudged or faded beyond belief), then the room numbers couldn’t be. Still, my excitement had faded at the remembrance of not seeing my family again. My throat felt tight.

“I miss them,” I whispered. Vayne closed the book and kept his hand on my shoulder to guide me out of the cellar.

“I know,” he muttered quietly. “I would, too, if I were you.”

Finding the room was relatively easy. I did not, however, like climbing three flights of stairs all at once and then continuing walking for another fifteen minutes while we looked for the room. Thankfully (or perhaps not), Vayne was there to keep verbally pushing me forward.

“For goodness’ sake…” he muttered as I hauled myself up the last few stairs. “How long are you going to take?”

_“Excuse me,”_ I panted, “for still not being used to this.”

“I had assumed you to be in better shape.”

I wheezed a laugh. My body bent forward slightly to catch my breath. “I have lost… a _lot_ of weight thanks to Gladio and the others. But that does not mean I’m used to climbing a million flights of stairs. Heck, I’m sensitive to heat; I threw up one day after training because of how fucking _hot_ it was.”

Vayne brought a hand to his forehead. Meanwhile, heat overtook me. It was pretty stuffy the further up the castle we went and the heat from the rest of the planet was _not_ helping my case. My skin was crawling; I needed something cold. My stomach felt weird.

“If we continue at this pace, we’ll never finish this little hunt of ours,” he scolded.

“Alright, alright, come on let’s-”

My stomach lurched. Oh no.

“What?” Vayne asked, noticing my worried look. “What is it?”

“‘Mr. Stark, I don’t feel so good’,” I quoted. I immediately regretted speaking. I covered my stomach with my arms. “Oh, this is awful.”

Vayne made a face. _“Please_ do not retch here.”

“Well, I’m _trying_ not to. It’s a genetic trait. My mom also got heatsick.”

I let frost dust my hands and crawl upwards. A relieved breath left me. The frost worked its way up my skin to my neck and down to my stomach. The excess heat slowly ebbed away. I still felt slightly nauseous, but otherwise was good. I gave Vayne a shaky thumbs up.

“Better?” he asked, arms now crossed and waiting. I nodded. “Good. Let us see where this room is.”

The more we walked around slowly, looking at the plaques beside each door, the more I cooled down. I dismissed the frost. I was actually kind of cold now.

“Ah, here it is,” Vayne said. He tried the door and sighed. “It appears to be locked.”

My shoulders dropped. “Well, now what?”

“I’m debating whether or not this scavenger hunt is worth our time.”

“What else do we have to do?”

“...Our search for the Dark Crystal Core is waning. Would we were to follow Materia’s bunch, but they’re rather focused on brilliance and eradicating the larvae that damned planesgorger left…”

“Hmmm…”

I stepped forward. I placed my hand on the doorknob to Room 364. On my command, it froze over.

“Well, now it’s even more useless,” Vayne commented. I held out a hand to stop him.

“Stand back.” I summoned Ithilcalad.

“What are you doing…?”

“‘You have my sword.’” I places both hands on the hilt and gripped it firmly. “‘And you have my bow.’” I brought the sword over my head.

“Now, _______, wait just a moment, this is-!”

“-‘AND _MY **AXE!”**_

I swung Ithilcalad down on the iced doorknob. I expected it to shatter like the MTs had down when I froze them over, but no. This was a more precise stroke and I was lucky that I had hit it at all.

My sword reverberating off the now chipped ice, throwing my hands back to smack me in the face. It dissipated.

“-a ludicrous idea…” Vayne finished. I whimpered in pain from how hard own hands with a _sword hilt_ in them had hit me. My glasses disappeared to Noct’s inventory for the time being. Vayne sighed. “Let me see.”

I tried to pull back, but he gripped my arm with his left hand and raised my chin up with the other. I closed my eyes so I wouldn’t embarrass and fluster myself further as he examined my forehead and nose closely.

“Sorry,” I said quietly.

“You’re lucky the blade didn’t split your scalp in half…” he muttered. I shuddered at the thought and dared to peek. He was so close now. Heat crept up my cheeks.

_Don’t look at his lips._

_Don’t look at his lips._

_Don’t look at his lips._

I swallowed and steeled myself against his light green gaze. We stayed that way for one moment longer than necessary.

“Hi…” I whispered shyly.

He blinked, stepped back, and turned his head to the side so his hair blocked his face. I could've sworn his cheeks were dusted the lightest shade of pink. “It looks fine. Hopefully it won’t bruise. So much for your ‘bright’ ideas.”

“I have another, actually.”

“Oh, dear…”

With my glasses back in place, I melted the ice and gripped the doorknob with my hand. I mustered all the fiery magical strength I could. It was channeled into the knob. I brought my other to join it as it heated up. It stung my hands but I persisted. I let out a short breath and groaned smally.

“Just _what_ are you doing _this_ time?”

A tiny mix between a groan and a whine began from the back of my throat. As I kept pouring heat into the doorknob, it became louder. My arms shook. I was putting all my physical strength into this as well.

Finally, with a gasping breath, I let go. The handle wasn’t even glowing.

“Seriously?” I breathed, shaking my hands to get the heat out.

“And what is it you were trying to accomplish?”

“I was trying to melt it…”

Vayne sighed and sarcastically said, “A valiant effort.”

“Well, do you have any _better_ ideas?”

“I do, but I’ll need _you_ to stand back this time.”

_…He’s gonna break down the door, isn’t he?_

My thoughts were correct. I trusted Vayne’s physical strength after seeing him fight, but… This door was _stubborn._ It _**would not**_ budge. I gazed on as he tried using his shoulder to slam into it. A few tries of that did not work. Next he kicking the handle in. He had as little luck as I had.

“Alright, fine,” he huffed. Sephira emerged from nowhere and copied itself. They circled around him, spinning and awaiting his command. Two of his fingers crooked toward the door. The blades shot out at full speed, crashing into the door and breaking through the wood. I had flashbacks to _the Shining._

_Vandalism. Who knew an imperial noble would do such a thing? Who knew the emperor would do such a thing?_

“Okay,” I muttered. “That was worse than what I did.”

“Just getting some frustration out,” he said, walking to the now butchered door. He reached arm through to unlock the door and let us inside. “This whole planet has me on edge.”

“You and me both, pal.”

“Please don’t call me that.”

“You and me both, _Your Imperial Majesty.”_

“Hmm… Much better.”

I straightened up and looked at him. He wasn’t smiling or even grinning, but that same amused glint from earlier was in his eyes.

“I am _not_ calling you that,” I half-laughed.

“And whyever not?” he said, amusement now clear through his voice.

“First, it’s way too long. And second, you’re my friend, so to me that means we’re equal.”

“Still, it is my proper title.”

“Well, same for Noct and I only call him ‘Majesty’ as a joke.”

He hummed and scanned the room with his eyes. Nothing seemed out of place. It was similar to the room I had slept in earlier. We both crept in, quiet now. I subconsciously slinked closer to Vayne. All the Markiplier videos I had watched on Earth started to catch up to me.

_What if something jumps out at us? What if something attacks us? What if it’s a ghost? I’ll never make it onto Buzzfeed Unsolved this way!_

_Is that really the thing to be worried about right now?_

My hand reached out and lightly latched onto his sleeve. He glanced at me.

“Is something the matter?” he asked.

I didn’t like the feeling the room gave me. It felt eerie and desolate. Hollow.

“Don’t tell me you’re _scared.”_

I nodded. “It’s dark in here. I don’t like how it feels.”

“...Would this be more of that disorder you told me of?”

I shrugged. “It just feels like something died in here.”

“I can assure you, I will let _nothing_ harm you.”

His emphasis on ‘nothing’ eased me slightly. I still stayed close to him as we explored the room. A shiver ran down my spine when we neared the wardrobe and bathroom. The bathroom door was stained with something dark. It looked like ash or the weird mist that comes off daemons. It had been there a long time, leaving residue around it and on the floor.

“Let’s _not_ go in there,” I whimpered. Vayne looked at me and then the door. He eyed the door and glanced back at the rest of the room. I don’t know what he was thinking, but he began to steadily walk towards the bathroom. I started to sing my words. “Oh-I-don’t-like-this-one-bit-at-all~!”

My voice lowered.

“Can-we-please-not-do-this-now-or-ever~?”

“Hush.”

Vayne placed a white gloved hand on the doorknob and turned it. I quickly hid behind him. The door creaked slightly as it opened. It hadn’t been used in a while. I couldn’t see around my friend but he stood in the door for a moment, leaning in to look further inside. I trembled behind him, gripping his coat.

Time passed as he checked the bathroom from every corner he could see to the next. I waited stiffly until he finally sighed.

“There’s nothing in here,” he said. “Nothing that shouldn’t be, at least.”

He flipped the lightswitch on. I stared dumbly as he walked forward. My hands slipped from his back. He analyzed the small room as I still stood.

_Stupid instincts. Why can’t you work when I need you to and then work when I **don’t** need you to?!_

The whole bathroom floor seemed to be made of white marble, including the large tub and sinks. I stepped onto it carefully, not wanting to leave marks on the otherwise unstained surface. A long mirror was built into the wall over the sink. I didn’t look at it. My memories from the other mirror and the other Me were still fresh.

“Nothing seems to be out of order,” Vayne said. “So whatever we are looking for must be out in the bedroom.”

_Don’t take it out of context Don’t take it out of context Don’t take it out of context Don’t take it out of context-_

He passed me by to make his way to the other room. His arm brushed mine. Goosebumps took over. I watched him walk to the small area between the bed and a door leading to a balcony.

_Ooh, balcony!_

As Vayne investigated the night stand and checked its drawers, I struggled to open the balcony door. It wasn’t locked, but it was so old that it had a hard time moving. I managed to force the handle down. The door moved outwards. A gust of wind blew by as I stepped out onto the small platform. Walking to the railing, I could see the cove of the island here. It was surrounded by vibrant shades of green as the forest grew around it. The castle was situated on a tall cliff. Water sloshed against the cove walls. A few boulders jutted out from the water. The sun cast its light on the waves, sparkles dancing on the surface.

“It’s so beautiful…” I muttered, taking a picture with my phone. Footsteps came up behind me. I leaned against the walled railing.

“It is, isn’t it?” Vayne said quietly, now beside me. “This world, as troublesome as it is, does have rather lovely sights.”

_And you, you’re the main attraction._

_**Stop.** _

_Say it. Flirt with him._

_**No.** I’ll make a fool of myself._

_Do it._

_NO._

_**Do it.** _

“And you’re one of them,” I whispered _extremely_ quietly. There was hope that he hadn’t heard me, and hope that he _had._

_God, what is wrong with me?_

“What was that?” he asked. I froze.

“U-uh… Um… I… wish something from Earth was one of them…?”

I glanced at him to see if he bought it. His eyes narrowed slightly. A silence reigned between us.

_What do I do?_

 

Her clarified sentence had been longer than what she had said. If only he had paid more attention when he first heard her whisper. But now… Now he had a choice to make. He knew it in his mind. He knew it in his _heart._ Had he ever been this nervous before?

He shouldn’t. He _really_ shouldn’t. This summoning would most likely be the last they see of each other. But then again… They should make the most of it, yes?

But he didn’t want to get her hopes up. Hell, he didn’t want to get _his own_ hopes up. He closed his eyes and sighed. The last thing he wanted was to break her heart. But he didn’t want to break his own, either. He knew he’d regret not even _trying._ So…

“Well, my dear,” he found himself saying, “you forget that you are here.”

It took a moment for her to process what he’d said. She was very perplexed. Confusion clouded her eyes and she looked away to ponder the meaning of his words. He saw a puzzled realization. And then her eyebrows lifted at the same time a faint red exploded in her cheeks.

“O-oh, um…” Her fingers began to tap at each other. “I… Oh… Um…”

 

_My, how adorable._

_Did he really just say what I thought he said?! **Please** tell me he did!!_

_How do I respond? What do I say? I didn’t think I’d make it this far._

“Th-... Thank-”

_Come on, tongue, work!!_

“Um, thank- you-...”

A soft laugh sounded from him.

“You really _do not_ give yourself enough credit,” he said. I stared straight ahead at the ocean. “As far as we know, you are the only thing from Earth here, besides that book. And that means that, naturally, you are the most radiant.”

My mind went completely blank and my heart swelled in my chest. It fluttered gently. I could feel his presence beside me, but other than that, I didn’t really register anything else.

“_______…?”

Silence. I still didn’t know how to respond. So I stood there, staring directly ahead, still processing his words.

“...When you said you don’t know how to handle compliments, I didn’t think you meant…”

Silence.

“How do I fix this…?”

_Come on, snap out of it!_

“S-sorry…” Slowly, I came back to my senses. “I, uh… Thank… you… I think…”

He turned to face me. My eyes kept flickering over to him. Keeping eye contact was incredibly difficult now. I didn’t know what to feel and I didn’t know how to deal with how I already felt.

“I mean every word,” he said honestly. “You should think more highly of yourself.”

“Uhh… I, um… Well, I mean…”

I scratched my head. He waited patiently.

“You know… It’s… Um, well, I… I mean I’m not…”

My shoulders slumped as I sighed. I now stared at the floor.

“I have no idea what to say…”

“That’s perfectly fine,” he chuckled. “But do not forget your true worth, yes?”

“...What _is_ my true worth?”

He was quiet for a moment. I assumed the worst and started to sink into self doubt once more. Had he just been improvising? Not knowing what to say? Not wanting to hurt my feelings?

“More than you think it is,” he promised.

 

We scoured the room from top to bottom. I reached behind the few clothes in the wardrobe to see if I could find Narnia. Nothing happened. Vayne checked all the drawers he could find. We found nothing under the pillows, nothing besides unlit candles on the table, and nothing between the cushions of the small sofa. I was starting to think that maybe we had reached a dead end after looking over the floorboards and walls for signs of secret compartments.

I perched myself on the bed and let myself fall back. It was so soft and sunk under my weight. So cushy! I could’ve fallen asleep again right there.

“It would appear we’ve come to a halt,” Vayne said, hands on his hips. “This was a _complete_ waste of time.”

“So now what?” I asked, cleaning my glasses with my shirt.

“Now, we continue our survey of the Dark World.”

“Yay…”

He chuckled. “You sound less than enthused.”

“All we’ve been doing is walking in circles.” I sat up, hands in my lap. “I’m tired. I just wanna wait until something actually _happens.”_

“If all you do is _wait,_ then what you seek will never be found.”

At that moment, something fluttered down from the ceiling. We watched it curiously as it fell, dancing in the air. I don’t know how it got stuck there, but a slip of paper landed in my hands. I stared at it for a long moment. Then I looked up at Vayne with the widest grin on my face.

“Don’t you dare,” he warned. My smile grew.

“What was that?” I teased. “Waiting gets me nothing?”

“A coincidence, at most.”

“Oh yeah? Perfect comedic timing, too. Maybe it heard you and thought ‘I’m about to end this man’s whole career’.”

“It is a piece of paper. It cannot think.”

“It was a joke, yeesh…”

I glanced at the paper. More Latin. I brought up the dictionary on my phone. When Vayne tried to take the paper away to translate it himself (read: much quicker), I batted his hand away.

_Inquire quod confirmat scientiam._

“Seek that…” I thought aloud. “Seek that knowledge… Seek that which strengthens knowledge.”

“Back to the library,” Vayne muttered.

_Librī terrae inter fluminem ostendent ianuam apsconditam._

“The books…” I kept going, “the lands… The books of the land… between rivers… The books of the land between rivers… will show the door… The _hidden_ door.”

“‘Land between…’?” Vayne huffed. “It will take an _absurd_ amount of time to scour through all those books for that.”

“It might mean Mesopotamia. That’s what that means. ‘Between the rivers.’ That’s where civilization started.”

Vayne blinked. We locked gazes for a moment. I waited patiently for him to react. Then he sighed and looked at the floor.

“If you were not here,” he said, “I don’t I ever would have started this… scavenger hunt of ours.”

“Is… is that a good thing or a bad thing?” I asked, confused. My head tilted to the side.

“In truth, it is both. I see it as a waste of time. We have more _important_ things to be doing, and yet, this could very well lead to a big discovery.”

“All discoveries have risks attached to them.”

He glanced up at me, an impressed light in his eyes. “...Indeed they do. Come, let us find these books…”

 

Finding the library wasn’t hard. It hadn’t changed at all since we last were there. Finding the section we were looking for, though… That was going to be much more difficult.

“Alright,” I said. “I don’t think this world has the Dewey Decimal System, so… Do we split up, or…?”

“I believe remaining together would yield better results,” Vayne said, somewhat hesitantly. “You know your world better than anyone else here.”

“There’s more people here?” I asked. I perked up. “Where? Are they ghosts? I’ve never seen a ghost!”

“No, there are no ghosts here. I meant the other warriors.”

“I know. I just like haunted things.”

My legs carried me through the middle section of the room. We walked between dusty tables and chairs that hadn’t been used in who knows how long. I decided to start with the area to the left of the staircase.

“Not too long ago,” Vayne said, “you were cowering behind me as we inspected a _bathroom.”_

“I wasn’t cowering,” I protested. “It’s called being cautious!”

“You were muttering to yourself.”

_“Singing,_ and yes, I was scared, but spooky things are cool - at least when you’re not experiencing them yourself.”

“This conversation is going nowhere.”

The next thirty minutes were spent scouring all the bookshelves along the left wall and between that and the tables. My feet ached incessantly. I was ready to collapse at one of the tables or comfy looking armchairs. Then my friend got my attention.

“Over here,” he called. I trudged over to where he was standing at the back of the room. “This one here…”

He pointed to a book on a high shelf. I was barely able to read its title.

“‘The Beginnings of Civilization.’ It is all I could find.”

I glanced between Vayne and the book and shrugged. He went to pull it from its place when I told him I couldn’t reach it. It got stuck halfway. He gripped it tighter and tugged.

“What, is it stuck?” I asked, confused as to why he wouldn’t just pull it out.

_Don’t say it don’t say it-_

_That’s what she said._

_Ugh._

“It won’t- budge-...” Vayne grunted. He gripped it with both hands and pulled. A clank of machinery sounded from somewhere nearby. The book shot back to its place. I nearly jumped three feet in the air when the bookshelf began moving. The floor shook slightly. A loud rumbling caused me to consider covering my ears. We watched as it slowly swung open, revealing a dark passage. When it was done, the shaking and rumbling stopped.

A few seconds passed. Then I turned to Vayne with a very wide grin.

_“Secret passage,”_ I whispered excitedly. I bounced on my feet. “Can we go in? Please??”

The light amusement returned to his eyes.

“As long as I have time to think,” he said. I tilted my head.

“Think about what?”

“...Our next move.”

“Oh, okay. I, um, just- just tell me if you need anything, okay?”

He dipped his head and we began the descent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I’m about halfway through XII and I am both slightly embarrassed and happy to say the Vayne I have given you is significantly softer than he has shown thus far. Mostly because all of his scenes in the game have been important and Dramatic™️ and Reader both reminds him of his brother and is at the same time her own endearing person. I have yet to see him interact with Larsa but I look forward to that :D


	52. Ad iustitium... ad nunc.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, some headway is made in the way of alliances...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “At a standstill... for now.”
> 
> Note: What Reader and Vayne find in the secret passageway is NOT in the game. It’s really just a fun “what if” thing for me so I hope you like it :D  
> Also this chapter features Vayne’s event “Conqueror’s Duty.” (finally)

Descending the stairs in the passageway was a lot scarier than in all the Nancy Drew games I played growing up. The long hallway was only lit by my phone’s flashlight, which wasn’t bad, but still… Cobwebs brushed my arm every few steps. It smelled weird, like mold and dust. The sound of our footsteps and breathing at least reminded me that I wasn’t alone. Vayne was quiet, _really_ quiet. I wanted to know what he was thinking. But I knew I shouldn’t ask. That was his business.

I sighed as another minute of nothing passed. The passage was long and narrow. We would have been squished together had we stood side by side, so I led the way with my phone in hand. Vayne loomed over my shoulder, staying close so he could see. Thankfully he was warm. The rest of the tunnel was cold and getting colder.

There was nothing to see. Nothing to comment on. Whenever the path curved, I’d get my hopes up that it was finally ending but nope. It’d straighten in a few seconds. So much for that.

Finally, _finally,_ we came to an iron door. It was padlocked and rusted. Neither of us had a key. My heart sank.

“Please don’t tell me we came all this way for nothing,” I muttered. Vayne emerged from his thoughts and moved in front of me. I held the light steady as he inspected the door.

“Another impasse…” he said. “Fitting, given the circumstances.”

“So what now? I really don’t want to walk all the way back up.”

“Well, you see, this door is _old. Very_ old.”

He nudged the padlock with his covered fingers. It slightly dropped due to its own weight.

“With enough force, it could come undone and crumble.”

I glanced at him. He seemed sure of that statement.

_Alright then. Iron’s a good conductor. Let’s hope even rusted iron can withstand this._

My hand clenched into a fist. A sharp spurt of lightning burst from the ceiling and - hit… Vayne…

I clapped my hands to my mouth as he twitched violently and then turned to glare at me.

“I assume…” he said slowly in a low voice, “that you didn’t mean to do that?”

“I’m sorry,” I squeaked. “Um, here, lemme just try-”

“I think you’ve tried enough. That’s three times now you’ve failed to open a door with magic.”

I shrunk back. “Sorry.”

At the very least, I had the right idea. We stood back and he let a spell go flying into the padlock. As expected, it caved and fell to the ground. I stared at it as Vayne opened the door. Such a disappointment of a lock.

“Coming?”

“Right!”

The iron door led to a circular room. Half of it was bathed in blue light while the other was illuminated in red. A pattern that oddly reminded me of a Pokeball led to the center. Where the ‘Pokeball’s’ clasp would be was a pedestal sprouting up from the floor. Pure, white light hovered over it. Its sparkling flooded out from it, pulsing and alternating between sky blue and scarlet. I waved my hand through the sparkles around us.

“How peculiar…” my friend said quietly. “That our hunt would lead here.”

“What is it?”

“I’ve no idea.”

We cautiously approached the pedestal. I noticed it had a basin, which was filled with water. The light danced on its otherwise peaceful surface.

_Touchy touchy._

I pressed a finger to the water. When it made contact, the hovering light pulsed brightly. I was pulled back. We watched it sink into the water and merge with the water. The light faded. We waited a few more seconds before approaching again. In the water was a landscape. A barren wasteland gave short way to trees and grass in the distance. The blue sky was accompanied by fluffy clouds.

_Touchy… touchy…?_

I peered up at Vayne. His eyes met mine.

“Touch…?” I asked. His eyes narrowed. He glanced around the room. There was nothing else to inspect. The basin was the only thing here.

“We’d have no way of returning,” he said.

“Torsion.”

“Besides those, yes. I have a feeling this area wasn’t meant to be seen.”

“All the more reason to go, then.”

He chuckled. “It would be wise to be cautious. We know nothing about where this leads.”

“Well, we’ll continue to not know unless we investigate.”

“Still… I’d rather be prudent than reckless.”

I side-eyed him. “Says the guy who wanted to destroy the world first thing.”

He sighed.

“Very well. It may provide us with information, at the least.” He gestured to the watery image. “Ladies first.”

I grinned.

_Touchy!!_

 

“Uhhh… I think I know why they said it was a counterbalance world now.”

I recognized the tower in the distance quite clearly. It had not welcomed me. Hopefully we wouldn’t have to go there. I had no desire to talk to Materia any time soon.

“I see…” Vayne said as he appeared next to me. He seemed fine. Neither of us had gotten lost between worlds. “At least they have tried to reform the atmosphere.”

“Yep. They still need better decorators, though.”

“I wonder if they know there’s a portal leading straight here.”

“Probably not. Should we do something about that?”

“These worlds are linked. It isn’t outside the realm of possibility that the planesgorger used the world of so-called ‘respite’ as a hideout when we defeated it.”

“I thought we killed it.”

“It left offspring. What we fight now is too weak to leave young of its own-”

“What, does it reproduce asexually through mitosis?”

Vayne sighed heavily.

“The _point,”_ he said, hands on his hips, “I am _trying_ to make is that we need to kill that thing now before it runs off to infect this world as well. We cannot have two interdimensional worlds threatening our homes.”

_“Your_ home.”

“I speak for everyone.”

“I don’t think they appreciate the sentiment but good on ya.”

He shook his head. _“Please_ take this seriously. Ivalice is of utmost importance to me. Its fate is not something I take _lightly.”_

“I know. I am. I just… don’t know how to help.”

He considered me for a moment. I stood awkwardly as he watched me carefully. My gaze and stance shifted as the quiet lengthened.

“Your support is enough,” he said finally. “It is what we need from someone who may not view this as dire a situation as we do.”

“...Okay. I mean,” I stuck my hands in my pockets, “it’s not that I _don’t_ think it’s a crisis situation…”

_I didn’t mean to come off that way._

“Yes, I know.” He huffed, irritated not at me, but what was going on. “But we don’t have any more time for fooling around. The longer we stay motionless, the more time that _snake_ has to manifest.”

He opened a Torsion.

“I do not think we should tell anyone about this just yet. Not even the _gods_ themselves.”

“Right.”

When we stepped into the portal, we were surrounded by purple cosmic light once more. Swirling nebulae and stars streaked across all the empty space between galaxies and stardust… I admired its aesthetic. As a person who _loves_ space, it was an amazing sight.

Vayne turned to me with a stern expression.

“You are to stay here,” he said firmly. I made to protest. _“Please.”_

“Where are you going?”

“...To offer my assistance.”

I perked up. “Really?”

He nodded.

_Why can’t I come with you?_

“It would be best without unnecessary complications,” he clarified. I sank back down and agreed quietly. Vaan would most likely be there and both of us were vocal about our opinions of the other’s actions. Or at least when the situation called for it.

“So do I just stay here?” I asked.

“You may go where you like. It’s easy to open a portal. You just have to feel it.”

“So you, too,” a voice interrupted us, “are siding with them? Those worthless worms…”

I jumped back at the sudden intrusion. The regal man in yellow from when we had taken Mog had returned. Luckily, Vayne has words for all occasions.

“How to keep the peace,” he said smoothly, the politician making its way back to his handsome features, “is an integral part of the upbringing of the men of House Solidor.”

My brows furrowed and I shot him a Glance™️.

_What about the women?_

“Those who stand above exist for those below them,” he continued.

“You didn’t say that in our debate earlier…” I muttered, crossing my arms. He gave me a glance that said ‘later.’

“We must now reassess our duties with the crystal core of light gone.”

Vayne opened a Torsion, ready to leave. He turned to me.

“Find somewhere safe. Stay there until I return, yes?”

“Okay…” I answered uneasily. I was afraid of how Vaan would react. Vayne nodded and left. I sighed.

_Time to try to open a portal thing._

“Hmph…” Oh right, that other guy was still there. “What role has duty when one has dominion?”

I glanced at him, not sure of what to say. I didn’t want to get in trouble with someone more powerful than me. I was _not_ ready to die _yet._

“And you, you agree with him?”

“Uh…” My body shivered as I tried not to panic. “I mean, it’s a sound argument to me.”

He scoffed. “I’d expect as much.”

My head tilted. “Uh, okay?”

_Don’t panic. It’s just a person. Just converse your way out._

_But I’m not **good** at conversing!!_

“With the way you follow him around like a scared, lost, little kitten.”

I blinked. Was that… supposed to be an insult?

_But I like kittens…_

“I mean, that’s not an inaccurate description,” I said awkwardly. “Um, did you _want_ something, or…?”

“Just remember your power is wanted by all of us here. Such potent magic, and _blind obedience,_ would be well rewarded…”

I didn’t like the look in his eyes. Panicking, I stuck my hand out and thought of the first place in this world I could think of. My hand shook. A Torsion opened. I scrambled for the opportunity to _leave._

“For the record,” I squeaked, “and you can ask Vayne himself, I _will_ argue against you.”

Feeling brave now that I had an escape, I stuck one foot into the portal.

“And by the way, you miss the _whole fucking point_ of ruling. Bye!”

His protests were cut off by my rapid scene exeunt.

 

The flowery meadow. The island where I first came here. Not a bad choice, I guess. Wouldn’t be too hard to find me later. I briefly wondered if I could view Vayne’s conversation and confrontation through a portal. Determination concentrated into magic. Focus…

A smaller Torsion appeared, giving me a nice view of the machinery area where we had met Cait Sith. Vaan, Firion, Onion Knight, Mog, and a Sandy Blonde Girl (SBG) I didn’t recognize were standing around, talking.

“It feels…” Vaan was saying, “imperial…”

_Does it? I guess it reminds me of that base we raided._

“It seems places like this are normal in other worlds,” SBG said.

“Normal, huh…”

At that moment, Vayne made his big appearance. He emerged through a Torsion with perfect timing. Mog went on high alert. I didn’t blame him.

“Why are you here, kupo?!” he exclaimed. Everyone turned to see who he was talking to.

“I understand you’re distrustful of me,” Vayne began. SBG looked _pissed._

“What are _you_ doing here, Vayne?!” she demanded.

_Oh shit._

If only I had some anxiety-reducing popcorn. Vayne continued his appeal.

“...I would like you to think of my appearance as my way of showing you my resolve. If we continue to focus on our petty grudges, we will all miss out on the larger problem at hand.”

_Good, good. Come on, Vaan, do me one solid here…_

“However, I do not expect you to readily comprehend my meaning.”

_No, you’re gonna piss ‘em off more!!_

“Well, of course not,” Onion Knight said sassily. “You need to tell us what you’re talking about before we can understand it.”

_You’ve got to be fucking kidding me._

“But considering how things got this way,” Firion backed him up, “it may not be easy.”

“Like _we_ could ever see eye to eye!” Vaan shouted.

“...Kupo…?” Mog had a realization.

“We don’t have to listen to you!”

“What is it, Mog?” Firion asked.

“Kupo…” Mog pushed through his fear. “Where’s ______, kupo?”

_At least **someone** is worried about me…_

Pause. Then Vaan was visibly upset. He had already drawn his sword, but someone would soon have to hold him back with iron fists to restrain him from throwing hands with Vayne.

_“You abandoned her already?!”_ he bellowed. Now _Vayne_ was visibly frustrated if not insulted. He took a step forward.

“Of _course_ I didn’t,” he said firmly. “She is safe and secure and much more capable than you give her credit for.”

He calmed himself, which is more than can be said for Vaan.

“My aim is to protect my home, nothing more.”

“Do you know how much blood has been shed for that very reason?!” SBG said.

_This isn’t going as I hoped…_

“Not just the boy, but the princess, too…” Vayne trailed. “I suppose we cannot talk like civilized people with all that blood rushing to your head.”

_Please don’t attack him, guys…_

“Be that as it may… I’m afraid I must insist on you seeing the larger problem looming above us. ...And to that aim, I will first give you the fight you want.”

“Are you fucking _insane?!”_ I blurted at the portal screen. For a moment Vayne looked distracted, like he had heard me. He paid it no mind.

“You’ll pay for what you’ve done, Vayne!” Vaan shouted.

_Note to self: ask Vayne just what the fuck he’s done to make these people so fucking **angry.**_

I watched Vayne send a pulse of blue magic through the ground at Princess SBG. She fell to her knees. Seeing as I had no emotional attachment to her, I continued to watch in earnest. And without popcorn.

“Ashe! Are you okay?!” Vaan quickly rushed to her aid.

“Is this your way of insisting?” Onion Knight asked. “Just what _is_ your purpose here?”

I facepalmed. This was going horribly.

“I’ve already told you,” Vayne reiterated, “I must protect my home. This is for that purpose alone.”

“Is it?!” Vaan asked, still unbelievably angry. “Is that why you got ______ to destroy the crystal core?!”

“That was her _own_ decision. Believe me, it surprised _me_ as much as it did you.”

“Who is this _______?” Ashe asked.

“I’ll tell you later,” Vaan said. “It’s a long story.”

“...Mog, summon our allies,” Firion said.

_For fuck’s sake, guys. **Honestly.**_

“I will discern for myself whether your strength is of any use to me,” Vayne said.

_He **meant** to fight them?!_

No wonder he left me behind for this.

 

The fight was… a fight. Not very fair, since they had a lot of allies and it was pretty uneven. But still, I had to stop myself from bursting head first through the Torsion to _stop them._ I had been told to wait and I could see why. Me getting in the way would just make things worse this time round.

Not-Ignis (I forgot his name) and Cait Sith joined them. Despite the uneven numbers, Vayne’s power was enough to take them on for a good while at least. I watched anxiously the whole time. Finally, Vaan was forced to his knees, hurt. But he stood again, unmoving.

“Just what do you want?!” he asked loudly.

_Jesus fucking Christ, he’s told you **twice** already!_

“I have already obtained what I want,” Vayne told him.

“What do you mean?” Onion Knight asked. He was a good mediator, at least. “Are you going to run away again?”

“Spirit moogle. These are my dimensional coordinates.”

“You mean you’ll be our ally, kupo?!” Mog asked, surprised.

_No, it can’t be that simple. He would’ve brought me along for that._

“Call me freely should the need arise,” Vayne said.

“Just what are you scheming?!” Vaan asked, still very loud. “And where’s _____? Why hasn’t she come to heal you?”

_“Heal_ him?” Ashe muttered, clearly disapproving of my choice of friends.

“I have told you,” Vayne said, “she is safe. I promised her brother once that I would look after her in his absence. I will not go back on my word.

“As for your first question… I no longer wish to play puppet to the gods.”

“Answer the question!” Vaan said impatiently.

“Let’s settle down a bit, Vaan, hm?” Cait Sith piped up.

_Yeah, Vaan, calm the fuck down._

“Why?” Vaan asked. “Do you know something, Cait Sith?”

“No,” Cait said. “But if you don’t let Vayne explain, none of us will ever know. ‘Cept maybe ______. And I trust she’s in good care.”

“I see… So he hasn’t even told you.”

“I have discerned this: the danger present in this world is a threat to Ivalice,” Vayne said. “However, despite the shattering of the crystal core of light, everything here remains unchanged.”

His gaze shifted downward.

“How things fare in our own worlds is yet a mystery to me.”

“...Materia said the crystal core of darkness is sustaining the world,” Onion Knight explained. “...For now.”

“I am looking for the crystal core of darkness. Ah-”

He looked to Vaan to correct himself.

_“We_ are looking for the crystal core of darkness. ______ does remain with me, of _her own decision._ I cannot grasp the size of the threat looming over my homeworld. It is an unfortunately grave state of affairs.”

He paused, giving a short sigh only I could hear. I recognized the annoyed look in his eyes he got when I was right about something.

“We need more information before we decide a course of action.”

_ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!??! YOU LISTEN TO ME **NOW?!?!?**_

Someone started chuckling.

“Ah, forgive me, Vayne,” Cait Sith said, still laughing slightly, “but you do realize that when ______ hears about you saying this, she’ll probably hand your arse to ya.”

Vayne closed his eyes and sighed more audibly.

“Yes, I am aware,” he said. “I wouldn’t be surprised if she was watching right now.”

“YOU’RE GODDAMN FUCKING RIGHT I AM,” I shouted at the screen. His eyes widened ever so slightly and he suddenly looked a tad weary. Oops…

“But I am not your enemy. Nor am I your ally. However, this arrangement works to our mutual advantage.”

_Kill me now._

“You certainly are a lad who loves his world,” Cait Sith said admittedly. “Even coming this far for it…”

_I know? Isn’t it sweet? In an almost… twisted sort of way…_

“It doesn’t exactly feel pleasant, but,” Onion Knight said, “I’ve got a friend like him.”

“I can’t accept this,” Vaan said, finally a little calmer. “I just _know_ he'll get in our way again.”

_For fuck’s sake…_

“Throw those coordinates away, Mog. I refuse to fight alongside him.”

_FOR FUCK’S SAKE._

“That’s enough, Vaan.” Oh right, I forgot the other guy was here. Thanks, Not-Ignis. “We’re not throwing anything away. _His Majesty_ went out of his way to present us a gift. We ought to accept it.”

“In that case, I’ll hold onto it,” Mog said uneasily. “If not for ______ 's sake… She did show me some mercy, kupo…”

_Undertale has taught me well._

“It will be an honor to be of service,” Vayne said. Not-Ignis turned to him.

“Don’t think this means we like it, though,” he said pointedly.

“It matters not to me. I wholeheartedly accept your hatred. I use my powers for Ivalice, not for the sake of friendship.”

_Betrayal._

“But there are objectives I cannot fulfill with those summoned by Spiritus.”

_**Betrayal.** _

“Which is why I offer my power to you in exchange for information.”

“Understand that we’re not the ones being used,” Not-Ignis clarified. “You are.”

“Then I pray you use my power well.”

_So humble. So polite. Come on, Vaan, why can’t you be like that?_

Vayne swiveled around and opened a Torsion.

“But what about ______?” Vaan asked. “I get she’s safe or whatever, but don’t we get her coordinates, too?”

“If you think you can withstand her wrath,” Vayne said almost teasingly. I knew it was aimed at me. Vaan went a bit pale. Vayne walked briskly through the Torsion. I closed the screen I had made and sighed.

_Well, that went well!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I also like to call this chapter: the one where no one is happy and Reader commentates.
> 
> Also yes, I remember Balthier’s name but Reader didn’t and also calling him Not-Ignis is really funny to me. (don’t they look alike though???)
> 
> And yes, Vaan really _was_ that uncooperative in Vayne’s event. *cue my extreme frustration*


	53. A Soft Heart In A Cruel World

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, a secure support group.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A guilty pleasure of mine is imagining Reader actually in the games. Her event in OO would be a few days after Vayne’s and this chapter title is the same as its.  
> Anyway, continuing on...  
> I think it’s a safe bet to say that Ashe and Reader aren’t going to get along well. Hopefully their little confrontation isn’t too over the top but oh well here it is *yeets chapter at you*  
> This one’s a little longer, so enjoy!  
> (also @eravanthia, enjoy some more Balthier ;) )

It took Vayne a while to locate me. I supposed I wasn’t where he thought I’d be. That was fine. Some time alone was always good for me. I spent the minutes I had trying to recreate the flower crown Aerith had given me. It didn’t work very well. Oh well. Maybe she’d make me another one.

_But where is Noctis? Did he ever get summoned? Or is it just me…?_

I missed him. Being with Vayne was fun, but… I missed the stupid arguments Noct and I had. It was nice knowing there was someone out there who understood me, who was a part of me. Who always finished my sentences. Who would awkwardly comfort me and tell me about the stars if I asked. Who was fiercely protective of me and who I was fiercely protective of. Yes, Vayne was nice and it was clear I was smitten with him, but…

_I miss my brother._

Standing, my eyes scanned the flower field. Nothing here looked similar to Eos. No beach like Galdin or desert grassland with scorching heat. No cities as beautiful as Altissia. At least I’d gotten that New York lookalike earlier.

Whirring sounds came from behind me. I figured it was the wind or some birds. The few steps forward did nothing to help my growing longing. The tug in my chest began again.

_I hope he’s somewhere safe, at least. With the others… I hope they haven’t forgotten me already…_

I made myself sad. Being forgotten is my worst fear. My throat tightened at the thought of them not even noticing I was gone.

_Click!_

Who would remember me if they forgot? Luna? Iris? Earth was gone, so…

_Hiss…_

“Hmm?” I looked over my shoulder.

_BOOM._

My body was flung forward as several rockets launched straight at me. When I landed, my head was ringing. _Everything_ hurt. It was like crashing into hard stone. I had flashbacks to Costlemark. The ground trembled as whatever was shooting at me stomped forward. I forced myself to my knees. My glasses were gone.

_**Shit.** _

_Click! Whir…_

**Bullets.**

 

“You _what?!”_ Noctis demanded. “Why the hell didn’t you _tell me?!”_

“We were a bit _preoccupied,”_ the princess, Ashe, and Vaan’s friend, said.

“Not to worry, Noctis,” Not-Ignis said. “I’m sure Mog can summon Vayne back here for you.”

“Kupo!” Mog twirled in the air. “Can do! Just a second, kupo…”

A few seconds later, a Torsion opened. Vayne came storming out, fire in his eyes.

“Forgive my anger,” he said through gritted teeth, “but your first summoning could not have _worse timing.”_

 _“Where is she?”_ Noctis hissed. Vayne’s eyes lit up with recognition. He looked relieved.

“Noctis… Come. We must hurry: she’s in danger.”

 

The Magitek unit began open fire before I could scramble to find my glasses. With a yelp, I struggled to my feet and sprinted away. The MT armor - which I recognized _very_ well - followed after me slowly. It had a wide range, though. I was lucky I didn’t get hit. Ithilcalad appeared in my hand. Ice shimmered over its blade, fueled by my fear. But my vision was still blurry.

_Aim’s not gonna do much like this…_

Still, I could either run or fight.

…

…

…I could only take one of these down if I had help. I ran.

My legs carried me as fast as they possibly could in a zigzag pattern across the open field. I saw a line of trees and headed straight for it. The Magitek armor gained speed. It rumbled after me, its larger size covering more ground. My breath started to get panicky. I was shaking. Every step felt like the ground would suddenly give way beneath me. I just had to make it to the trees.

_I just have to make it to the trees._

_Whir… Shnk!_

The rumbling stopped. I kept running but slowed down to hear what was happening.

 _The Magitek armor landed **right on top of me.**_ I was forced to the ground with a loud, pained scream.

 _“NOCTIS!”_ I called. I didn’t know what to do. I summoned my sword and tried to swing up, but my arms wouldn’t move. The armor raised one of its legs to stamp down and readied its rockets once more. _“Noctis, **please!”**_

_I can’t move I can’t move I can’t move I can’t move_

_Noctis isn’t here._

_**Noctis isn’t here.** _

_Noctis isn’t here and there’s no one here to help you._

Frost shot out on both sides of me, both lines at least twelve feet long. I tried grasping for my magic. It wasn’t under control. I managed to freeze one of the thing’s legs but it didn’t stick to the ground for long.

_Noctis isn’t here._

_NOCTIS ISN’T HERE._

_“VAYNE!”_ I screeched. _“Please! Someone! Vayne, please!”_

_Fshwhoohp!_

A shattering of light blue crystal burst over me. I would know that sound anywhere. My heart sang with joy. Flashes of blue and the sound of metal on metal lit my sense aflame. Another pulse of blue indicated his Armiger. More weapons joined in the fight. Sephira, a spear I didn’t know, more swords I’d never seen. Gunshots could be heard from a distance.

The Magitek armor shifted off of me, now focused on Noctis and the others. I still lay curled on the ground, in shock from the completely unexpected attack and escape. As people jumped into further action to put the thing down, one person rushed to my side and pulled me up.

“Why is it,” Vayne began, out of breath, “that whenever I leave, you get into trouble?”

I clung to him like a lifeline. He reluctantly allowed himself to show comfort in the presence of others and returned the gesture, though very loosely.

“Please don’t leave me again,” I whispered, still terrified. His grip tightened when he felt me shaking in his arms. “Please… Please…”

“Shh… It will all be over soon.”

A loud _crash_ indicated the unit had been put in its place. Cheers met my ears. Vayne went to release me, but I held on tighter.

“No, don’t leave,” I whimpered. He cleared his throat.

“Really, I think it would be best if they didn’t-”

_“________!”_

My eyes opened.

_Was that really…? So I wasn’t seeing things?_

I looked up. It _was._ Noctis. Noctis was running towards me, looking a little roughed up but otherwise fine. Vayne let go and I took off.

_“NOCT!”_

I nearly tackled him in my remaining fear-fueled adrenaline rush. Thankfully, he was just as worried as me and we canceled each other out. He did stumble a bit, though.

“Thanks the _Astrals_ you’re alright,” he said breathlessly. “I’ve been worried _sick.”_

“I didn’t know you were here,” I choked. “I’m really, _really_ glad you are.”

Both of us refused to part for several moments. When we did finally feel awkward about hugging for so long, he gripped my shoulders with both hands.

“What the _hell_ have you been doing?!” he asked. “Hanging around with people you don’t know, trying to _destroy worlds._ What the fuck’s gotten into you?!”

“Uh, Noct-?”

“Do you have any idea the things they’ve told me about him?”

“Well, I-”

“And you just _went off_ with him! Are you insane?! Didn’t your parents ever tell you about stranger danger?!”

“Noctis!” I managed to say. “What the hell are you talking about?”

He paused. “What do you mean, what am I- You don’t _know_ any of these people.”

“...Yes, I do…? Don’t tell me _your_ memories are gone…”

Noctis blinked. “Wait… So… You… _didn’t_ lose yours?”

“I did, but I got them back.”

Everyone started to gather around us now that the work was done.

“Had a mental breakdown- Actually I had _two_ mental breakdowns, three if you count the one I _just_ had. But hey, those have been the norm for me this past month, heh… Oh! And don’t worry about Vayne - he’s cool. Helped me with all three breakdowns. So… no need to worry about that, okay?”

I had never seen Noctis looked more relieved than in that moment. His whole body relaxed. It was then that I realized what had just happened. I recognized most of the people around me: Cait Sith, Vaan, Not-Ignis, Penelo, Ashe (who I hadn’t formally met yet), Cecil, Terra, the Warrior of Light, and Y’shtola. They also looked like that Magitek unit had given them some trouble.

“Um, is everyone okay? Thanks for saving me, by the way. I can help whoever’s hurt-...”

A hand grabbed my shoulder and pulled me back.

“For _goodness’ sake,”_ Vayne started frustratedly. “You _cannot_ take it upon yourself to heal everyone when you look like hell _yourself.”_

“But I-” I was cut off.

“Yeah,” Noctis said, surprising everyone by agreeing with their supposed once-enemy not-ally. “How many times do I have to tell you-?”

 _“You’re going to end up hurting yourself,”_ both Noctis and Vayne said very sternly at the same time. I winced and sank into my hoodie.

“Okay, okay,” I said with a sheepish grin. “But I _am_ glad you’re all okay.”

“Did that really just happen?” I heard Vaan say.

_**Anger.** _

My eyes narrowed at him.

 _“You,”_ I hissed. Ithilcalad shimmered into existence.

“Me?” Vaan gulped. I started forward.

“Uh, ______?” Noctis said. Silence.

“The _fuck,”_ I emphasized, “is _wrong with you?”_

“What is that supposed to mean?” Vaan said, confused. “I just _helped_ you!”

“And? Is that supposed to erase the _shitshow_ I saw earlier when you wouldn’t even listen for _five **fucking** seconds?”_

“Hey, I had plenty of reason-!”

“No, you fucking didn’t. Now listen _now.”_

“_______…” Noctis still went unheard.

“We’re all stuck in this stupid excuse of a world with no people and no animals and _nothing_ and _none_ of us can return to where we came from until we _fix it_ and _you_ wouldn’t even _consider_ working with someone you hate when I know damn well other people here have agreed to accept help from _their own_ enemies.”

I took a deep breath.

“You’re _lucky…_ I’m _nice.”_

“Um, ______?” Penelo managed to say, a tad amused Vaan was being put in his place. “I think you’re scaring him.”

I probably was. I was cut up and scratched all over from being underneath the Magitek armor. My clothes were slightly singed from the explosion earlier. The anger radiating off me did not help that image.

“What?” Vaan protested. “I’m not scared!”

“Yeah, you are,” Penelo said shortly.

“Yeah, right!”

Someone cleared their throat.

“If I may,” Vayne said behind me. I turned on him, the tip of my blade right between his chin and his chest.

“And as for _you,”_ I said. He didn’t look scared, just annoyed. “You certainly may _not._ Don’t get me _started_ on _you._ Where _would_ I even start? The ‘why the fuck didn’t you _listen_ to me’? The ‘there’s a lot I still don’t know about you’? The backwards way you go about doing things? _The ‘why the fuck didn’t you **listen to me’?”**_

“You know _well_ why I did what I did.”

“That doesn’t make it _right.”_

He sighed and lowered my sword. “At the very least, we _both_ got what we wanted.”

My eye twitched. I dropped Ithilcalad, letting it dissipate. Then I turned to Noctis and gestured dramatically to Vayne.

“Do you see what I’ve had to put up with?” I complained. Most everyone laughed. It helped to convert my anger back to the excitement of seeing Noctis again.

“I was under the impression you _enjoyed_ my company,” Vayne said, miffed but amused.

“I _did_ and still do but _still.”_

I looked back to Noct.

“I missed you.”

He grinned. “Heh, figured.”

“Wha- hey! You didn’t miss me?”

“Well, it was nice not being zapped by electricity whenever you get bored.”

His point was made when I did so just to annoy him.

“Do you really have your memories back?” a familiar voice said. I finally realized how many people were around.

_Talkativeness Level decreasing…_

It was Terra. I managed to give her a grin.

“Hey,” I said awkwardly. “Uh, sorry… And… Yeah…”

“That’s good to hear,” Y’shtola said. My happy eyes flitted to her. “We’ve all been a bit troubled over you joining strangers on their journeys.”

I laughed nervously. “Ah, well, n-no- no offense but… Ah…”

“Vayne shouted familiarity?” Cecil chuckled. “Figuratively, of course.”

“The most, yeah, but all of you did. It was kind of off putting, to be honest. You, uh, you all good now? That mirror was something else…”

He nodded. “I am, thank you.”

“It’s good to see you’re all in one piece,” Warrior said cordially. “As everyone else has said, we’ve been worried.”

“Noctis told us some things that could’ve affected you a lot more if left alone,” Cecil explained.

“Ah,” I said, leaning awkwardly to the side. “Did he now?”

“What?” Noct said, crossing his arms. “I heard some bad things about the guy you ran away with. Forgive me for being _concerned.”_

“Don’t say it like that! It makes it sound weird!”

“It’s pretty weird regardless…” Penelo jutted in.

“But why?” Terra asked, coming forward. “Why did you forget? Did you _choose_ to?”

I nodded. “I, uh, I’ve… _been_ through some stuff in the past few weeks, the last of which was the worst. So, I, ah… just wanted to, uh, temporarily forget for a bit. I didn’t mean to erase the ones of you guys, though… Sorry about that.”

“But _why?”_ Noctis said. “I mean, I get _why_ but they don’t.”

“I, uh, really don’t want to bother you all with it.”

“It may be a bit too late for that,” Y’shtola said.

“We were in that mirror together,” Cecil said. “I’m sure we can understand.”

“It’s not that- it’s not that I- I don’t…” I stuttered. “I mean, I’m _pretty_ sure you’ll understand, but I don’t want you to _worry_ more than you already have, you know?”

“That is for us to decide,” Warrior said.

“Even Vaan’s been worried!” Cait Sith chimed in. “And that fortune I gave ya… It didn’t sound too pretty.”

I gazed down at the ground.

“It’s, um…” I tried to think of how to phrase it. “It’s like…”

Noctis laid a hand on my shoulder.

“It’s okay,” he said. “We’re here now.”

Tears pricked my ears.

“I just wanted to remember what having hope felt like,” I croaked. “I learned a terrible truth that I knew would end up breaking me. It took a week to process it. And then I got summoned here and… The opportunity presented itself so…”

I sighed.

“I knew it was going to happen. I shut down so I wouldn’t experience the full horror of it.”

 

We managed to find my glasses in the grass and flowers. They were surprisingly fine. It was nice to see everyone’s not blurry faces. And by not blurry, I mean from both bad eyesight and tears. A few were shed at my admittance. Everyone was sweet about it, though. I received several (awkward on my part) hugs and declarations of support. That caused more tears to fall and I found myself wanting to die from how much crying I’d been doing in the past few hours.

Noctis and I stayed side by side after that. We traveled through a Torsion back to where Mog and everyone else was. The machinery place I hated. It still wasn’t easy on the eyes.

“This place is killing my eyesight,” Noct complained. “Can’t look at it for long before they start burning.”

“Saaame,” I said, looking at the ground. “Imagine going on a scouting mission in here.”

“Is that what you spent your time doing?”

“That and a scavenger hunt.”

“A what? Really?”

“Yep.”

Vayne cleared his throat. I looked up at him.

“I do believe I’ve overstayed my welcome,” he said.

“Oh…” My heart sank. “We’re leaving already?”

He blinked. “We?”

We stared at each other for a moment. Noctis turned to the side to give us a little space.

“Well, yeah,” I said, confused. “What…?”

“Forgive me. I assumed this was where we parted ways.”

My heart sank even lower. “O-oh… You’re… not staying?”

“I have no reason to. If you saw the ‘discussion’ I had with the boy and his friends, then you know our agreement.”

“...Oh… Okay…”

More tears welled up.

_Dammit, stop!_

“Um… Mm…”

_What do I say?_

“Please don’t go…”

His gaze softened. “For the sake of peace, I don’t believe I would be welcome along the entire journey.”

“Then I’ll come with you!”

He shook his head. “You should remain here. You have better support here.”

“Is this about that promise you made?”

“No, but I do think it best-”

“Then why?”

“_______.” Our gazes met. “You _know_ why.”

I wrapped my arms around myself. It felt like a part of my heart suddenly went missing. I didn’t like the hollow feeling it left.

“Do you _have_ to?” I asked in a whisper. He closed his eyes for a moment before opening them.

“Yes,” he said. “I think it would help both of us to focus if we spent some time apart.”

“Oh…” I swallowed a large lump in my throat. “O- Okay… If that’s… what you want…”

_Why does it sound like he’s breaking up with me? We’re not even a couple??_

But that thought worsened the pain.

“Do you get off on breaking her heart or something?” Noct suddenly sassed.

“I beg your pardon?” Vayne asked, offended.

“You guys spent all that time together and now you’re just gonna leave? Like last time?”

“Noctis…” I muttered warningly.

“It is not as if I won’t return,” Vayne said matter-of-factly.

“Yeah?” Noct said, crossing his arms. “With the way I heard your talk with them went, you don’t really know that.”

“If they did not need my power, they would not have accepted, however reluctantly.”

“Alright. Then you’ve got to make another promise.”

“Noct!” My protests went ignored.

“And what would that be?” Vayne asked, not very satisfied with how this conversation was going. Noct pulled him away from me to talk privately. I huffed.

“You gotta check in,” Noctis told him quietly. “Not frequently, but often enough. Not just when they call you.”

“And why, pray tell, would I do that? That will only serve to drive the wedge further between myself and the other Ivaliceans.”

“It’s not for that. It’s for _______. You two obviously care for each other and I don’t want her moping around for another hour. I don’t like the stuff I heard about you but you make her happy. Just… check in once in a while, alright?”

Vayne sighed. “I had already considered it. But I do need space to think without distractions.”

“I don’t… need to know how she distracts you.” Noctis cringed inwardly. He continued before Vayne could protest that somewhat inappropriate thought. “But I’m her brother and I _will_ kick your ass if you make her sad, got it?”

From one protective older brother to another, Vayne understood. Was he that obvious with his feelings? Or was Noctis just making assumptions?

“Then for her sake,” he said amicably, “I will do as you ask.”

“Good. Now go tell her.”

I was gazing depressingly at the ground. It was nice to see my other friends, but I really did like traveling with Vayne. We made a good team. However, I also wanted to stay with Noctis. We understood each other. We were family. I felt more comfortable around Noctis than I did anyone else.

_Why can’t I be with both of them?_

Someone cleared their throat. Vayne stood before me, looking very purposeful. I blinked.

“Do not despair,” he told me. I tilted my head. “I would not leave you for long.”

My eyes brightened. He took a deep breath.

“Thus, if it would please you, I will visit between summons. Especially considering your loss, I believe it would do well to make sure you are holding up well enough now that you have been reunited with your brother.”

All of me lit up. “Really? You’d do that for me?”

“Of course. It would be dishonorable of me to neglect you whilst you mourn.”

I stood on my toes to wrap my arms around him. An ‘oof’ left him and one hand patted my back awkwardly.

“Thank you,” I whispered. “That means a lot, even if Noctis made you do it.”

I let go and gave him a wide smile.

“Well, I had already been considering it,” Vayne said. He straightened himself. “He merely swayed me in that direction. Now, I believe I shall depart.”

“Don’t take too long…”

Noctis and I watched him disappear into a portal.

 

“Uhh… We’re supposed to get _in that?”_

Materia’s warriors traveled on foot. Or at least, that’s what I had _thought._ And they did! But when it came to island hopping, they got a bit of rest for their feet. On an airship. That _flies._ And it wasn’t like the empire’s airships, either. It was more like a _flying boat_. But for the _sky._

“Pretty cool, right?” Noctis said. “We don’t have anything like this in Lucis.”

I swallowed. “It’s, uh, well, it’s _something,_ alright…”

He glanced at me. “I thought you were fine with heights.”

“Well, I mean, I’ve been on planes before but they’re not giant, flying _boats._ They’re like… air-buses. This is a _boat._ With an _open top._ Is it… safe?”

“‘Safe?’” Not-Ignis’ voice came from behind us. He stood with an excited Vaan and Penelo. “It’s perfectly safe.”

“What, you don’t have airships where you’re from?” Vaan asked, like _I_ was the weird one.

I gestured to the ship, which was floating lazily in the sky. The top part already had people walking around on it. Wouldn’t they get blown off?

 _“That,”_ I said, “is an airline safety regulation _violation, **surely.**_ There’s no cover. How do people not get sucked _off_ the plane?”

“Plane?” Vaan questioned. I glared at Noctis.

“Why does _no one_ know what a plane is?” I muttered frustratingly. “That’s a _boat._ Won’t the wind and air friction send people flying _off it?”_

“Goodness, no,” Not-Ignis said. He corralled us forward to the ladder that was waiting to be climbed. “What kind of flight experiences have you had?”

“Ones where if you opened the emergency door, you’d get sucked out of the vehicle so fast, no one’d be able to catch you or save you.”

“How fast are these things going?” Vaan asked.

“I dunno, maybe, like, five-hundred miles per hour?”

 _“Five-hundred?!”_ they both chorused, looking appalled.

“Yeah, no,” Vaan said. “We’re not going _that_ fast.”

“What sort of people are flying at such speeds?” Not-Ignis accused. “Speed devils, I’d bet.”

“Well, I mean, how else are you supposed to cross the ocean as fast as you safely can?” I countered. “And we don’t just use planes for travel. Military’s got them as well. Some people collect model kits and build really tiny ones as a hobby.”

“That sounds cool,” Vaan admitted.

“Don’t get any ideas,” Penelo warned him.

“What _kind_ of ideas?”

“Don’t go off trying to _build_ your own airship.”

“Well, now that you mention it…”

As they began to bicker, I glanced at the ladder. Not-Ignis said ‘ladies first’ and I swallowed. It was a _long_ way up. I didn’t like the look of that climb.

“Don’t worry,” Noct assured me. “If you fall, I’ll catch ya.”

“Can you…” I licked my lips nervously. “Can you warp to catch me?”

“Yeah. It’ll be fine. Go on up.”

Panic set in as the ladder began to wobble as soon as I had one foot on it. I tried to swallow it as I didn’t want to cause any problems or setbacks for my new friends. The feeling of leaning back slightly as I hesitantly began to climb wasn't welcome. It didn’t feel right, like the ladder was broken and would snap at any moment. I paused after a few rungs of shakily holding my balance. My head tilted back.

There was still at least a hundred feet to go. I let out a complaining groan. My hand left its rung and shook its way up to the next. It was a slow process, but I decided to go one by one so I wouldn’t scare myself.

And then someone else got on, making the whole thing try to twirl. I held on tightly and refused to look down.

“Are you okay?” Penelo was beneath me. “Just focus on the ladder. You’ll be fine.”

I nodded slightly and tried to continue. My hands were starting to get sweaty. I ignored that and tried to hurry.

_See? You’re holding them back. This is why you didn’t stay before._

_Oh, come on, you couldn’t have stayed away for a little bit longer?_

_They’ll see how worthless you are soon enough. The last thing they need is an inexperienced, mourning girl delaying them._

_Please go away. I preferred when you were gone._

Keeping to my thoughts was a good way to go, though. It helped me to focus on something other than my panic.

About halfway up, the wind could be felt swishing by. It rattled the ladder. Waiting for it to stop yielded little results so I made myself push on.

_What they must think of me already… I’m too slow, friends with their mortal enemy, and have no world experience (at least according to their worlds)._

I desperately wanted to close my eyes until I reached the top. Unfortunately, I needed my eyes to see where the top was. My arms ached by this point from supporting my weight for so long. When I neared the ship, I sighed in relief. I picked up my pace, ready to feel something solid beneath me.

Once inside, I flopped down against the wall, legs not feeling like heading out to work. They had wobbled like a newborn lamb when I tried to stand. My eyes closed and I took a deep breath.

“Kupo…?”

I opened to see Mog hovering over me. My body jerked in surprise.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to startle you, kupo…”

“Oh, hey, it’s you,” I said, running a hand through my wind tousled hair. “Um, sorry about the way me and my friend treated you before. He was just really worried about his home.”

I could barely hear someone scoff nearby.

“I forgive you, kupo!” Mog said happily. “You were really nice. Thanks for calming him down, kupo.”

I shrugged. “Hey, no need for unnecessary conflict, right?”

“Agreed, kupo!”

“Hey, you okay?” Noctis came walking over to us. I nodded.

“Just a bit, uh… unsettled,” I explained. “I never want to do that again. At least it doesn’t _feel_ like it’s in the air.”

At that moment, the airship lurched forward to begin its flight. I was knocked over by this movement.

“Nevermind.”

“Here.” Cecil came over to lend a hand. “I’m used to traveling by airship. It takes some getting used to.”

He and Noct helped me up.

“Thanks,” I said. The ship swayed under our feet.

“It’s better up top,” Cecil said. “And the view is spectacular.”

We followed him to the top, where lots of people were now hanging out. The wind _was_ pretty wild up there, but it wasn’t enough to knock someone off unless they were being stupid and reckless. And the view _was_ amazing. The ocean below shimmered in the light. The islands looked so much smaller. I didn’t dare to lean on the railing, but I did snap a few pictures for Prompto.

“So what are we doing next?” Noctis asked.

“Kupo!” Mog bounced in the air. “Looking for more allies, kupo! The monsters are getting stronger, so we need all the help we can get!”

“What we have isn’t enough?” I asked. I glanced over the small _crowd_ of people up top.

“Unfortunately, no, kupo… The planesgorger is very strong. We’re destroying all the larvae we find, kupo, but there seem to be more than we bargained for…”

“Pandora’s Box…”

“Pan-what?” Noct asked.

“Just an old myth about a woman who opened a box full of evil things that came spilling out. I mean, it was an innocent looking box, so… This is just like that.”

“I’ll say.”

I decided to sit on the floor against the railing. Whoever was driving the ship said we had some time so I wasn’t going to waste it by exhausting myself further. Noctis plopped down next to me.

“How are you holding up?” he asked. The spot we were in was generally open with a few people here and there, so no one overheard. “I mean, how are you _really_ holding up?”

“Um, well…” I thought of how to phrase it. “Better than I expected. It’s nice to have something to distract me. I still can’t tell whether erasing my memories helped at all, though… Vayne was a big help. He’s really sweet under all that cold and calculated stuff.”

“Figures. Guess I should’ve thanked him for that. I mean, he didn’t _have_ to take that one promise so far, so… I owe him one.”

We sat in comfortable silence for a while. I wanted to say something, but I didn’t know what to say. I wanted to tell Noctis everything that had happened. Would he want me to? Should I? Even if not, I was still thankful he was there. Being so nervous around Vayne got a bit taxing.

“I’m really glad you’re here,” I said quietly. I leaned my head on him. He shifted to accommodate me.

_Warm._

“Yeah, me too.”

 

When conversation grew null and we didn’t have anything to do, one of Noctis’ new friends called him over. I don’t remember what for - I wasn’t really paying attention - but I did know that my continued alone time felt both nice and empty. I wanted someone to fill the space next to me. I wanted _comfort._ I wanted _physical touch._

_What is happening to me? I’ve never liked that before!_

_You’ve lost everything. I think that accounts for wishing there was something to fill the void._

_I wish Noctis would come back…_

And then someone _did_ come along. Only, what they wanted was a confrontation, not to help me.

I was trying to distract myself by looking through the pictures I’d taken on my phone. I _had_ managed to get a picture of Vayne for Iris (when he wasn't looking). It was a good shot, too. The lighting was perfect. Then there were the ones of Altissia and Cape Caem. Those happy times… Someone came walking towards me. I thought they’d go right past, so I didn’t bother looking up. Then a partial shadow crossed over me.

Princess Ashe stared down at me accusingly.

“Um, hi…” I said awkwardly. I didn’t know her. How should I _talk_ to her?

 _“You’re_ the one who was with Vayne.” The way she spat his name did not rest well with me.

“Uh, yeah. Did you… Did you need something…?”

“I would like to know _why.”_

I blinked twice. “What do you mean, why?”

It was her turn to looked puzzled.

“I mean _why_ would you want to travel with _him_ of all people?” she clarified. “Vaan told me he’s tried to tell you of the horrendous things that man has done. Why wouldn’t you _listen?”_

“Um… I don’t know. I like to keep an open mind?”

“An open mind… Even against someone as ruthless as an _imperial?_ An imperial who’s caused so much _harm_ and _suffering?”_

“Uh, well, I try not to discriminate, y’know?”

Wrong answer.

“‘Discriminate’? Discrimination has _nothing_ to do with it! Vayne has committed terrible crimes: he’s started so many wars in the name of his _home._ All they brought were death and destruction!”

I stared at her. “And?”

 _“And?!_ I think that speaks for itself!”

“You… I mean, I assume you know how empires work, right? I’m not saying I approve, but they do like their conquest. And it’s not like I have any place to comment - I’m not _from_ your world.”

“But I would assume he’s been filling your head with _lies_ about his motives. All Vayne wants is _power.”_

“I… well, I mean yes. Not the lies part - But! That’s not all he wants.”

“As far as _I_ know, it _is._ That’s all he’s _ever_ wanted.”

“And why would he want it? To protect what he loves. If you’ve even spent five minutes with the guy, which you have by now, you’d know that.”

“I can’t believe this.” She didn’t seemed pleased with my stance. “You're actually _defending_ him.”

“...Yeah…?”

“I was assured you were more _reasonable.”_

“I try to be. He’s my friend and I support my friends. That doesn’t mean I approve of all their actions, though. But I do wish him well in his endeavors, be it peace or war.”

“How… _dare_ you…!”

“Hey, you were the one who came up to me.”

“It was because of _Vayne_ that my home was invaded. It was because of _Vayne_ that my husband and father were _killed._ They took _everything_ from me, including my right to the throne with no evidence of my birthright to claim it back. And you, the way you talk to and act around him; it’s like you don’t even _care_ about the atrocities he’s put into place.”

My skin felt uncomfortable. I had figured Vayne had a lot of blood on his hands. I wasn’t going to let that deter my feelings. Ashe, though, was accusing me of… _something._ I didn’t like it. I didn’t like the accusatory tone in her voice. Like I’d done something _wrong._

“And… what exactly have I done wrong?” I asked, nervous now. She was working hard to call herself down.

“You’ve _associated_ yourself with him,” she said, collecting her thoughts. “I already could not believe we’d have to work _with_ him, but to be around someone who openly _defends_ and _idolizes_ him is even worse. He is nothing but a _villain.”_

I narrowed my eyes. “I don’t _idolize_ him. He’s my friend. He’s got flaws, believe me, I _know._ But he’s helped me through some things. If you think that all he is is some power-hungry dick, think again. He’s a _person._ A _human being._ He has layers, like anybody else. To think otherwise would be shallow.”

“How dare you talk to me that way…! I am the _Princess_ of Dalmasca. I will _not_ be treated with such disrespect.”

I blinked, unimpressed. “Is that supposed to mean something to me? Noctis is a _king_ and I treat him like anybody else. I do the same with Vayne. He doesn’t mind.”

“You have no _idea_ the things that I have lost,” she said slowly, rage seeping out into her voice. “All of it, because of Vayne.”

“Yes, you’ve said that. Is that all, then?”

“I know you’ve lost something dear to you.”

Anger poured into my chest.

“But it could _never_ be as much as I’ve lost to the heathen of a man you call your _friend.”_

I shot to my feet as fast as I could.

_Calm down._

“Let’s not compare our problems, hmm?” I said lowly. She had _one_ chance to resolve this peacefully. “Things affect people in different ways.”

“If you could even _feel_ the pain that he has caused me, you would hate him just as the rest of us do.”

“Then let’s leave it at that. I’ll agree to disagree, but he is still my friend. I will _not_ turn my back on him.”

She shook her head like she had been betrayed. I guessed she assumed I’d side with her. Nope. Not today, not ever.

“Don’t you have a family?” she asked. So persistent! “A _home?_ Imagine it being taken away by Vayne. He’d do it in a _heartbeat_ and with _no_ concern for _you._ Wouldn’t that break you? Wouldn’t you want _vengeance?_ Do you not care for your home? Your _country?”_

“You don’t know a thing about me,” I warned. My fingers curled and uncurled. There was static in the air. “And it’s not as if Vayne could actually invade my home. And I do believe he does care for me. We shouldn’t compare grievances. I’d really like to talk about something else.”

“Then why don’t we talk about the home you apparently don’t care for?”

A sharp step forward. My sword flashed to my hand.

“You have _one_ chance,” I growled. “Leave it be. Walk away.”

“Are you threatening me?” Ashe demanded.

“I’m warning you. Leave my home _alone.”_

“Then why aren’t you _fighting_ for it? If you cared about your home and your people, you’d work to _get home._ Why are you wasting time with _Vayne_ and your _friends?”_

“That’s none of your business.”

“It is if there’s an injustice. I worked _hard_ to find a way to destroy the empire and claim Dalmasca as free once more. You’re just wallowing in self pity, waiting for _Vayne_ of all people to come _rescue you!”_

“I am _not._ I love my home, my world. I’d go back in an instant if I could.”

“Well, if you love it so much, why not _take it back?”_

_“There’s nothing **to** take back!!”_

Lightning cracked, nearly hitting the ship. I gasped. _Shit._ There was no smoke, so no fire, but… Everyone was looking at us now.

Noctis came running over.

“What’s going on?” he asked. I was shaking now, gripping Ithilcalad tightly. Ashe looked conflicted, realizing she’d gone too far but also still filled with hatred for Vayne and his _friend._ “What just happened?”

I stared Ashe right in the eyes. “My home… was _destroyed._ An entire planet… _gone._ And you have the _audacity_ to compare my problems to yours? Vayne has _helped_ with this. He’s been comforting and _sweet_ and yes, a little awkward. But don’t forget that there’s _always_ someone out there who has it worse than you. You shouldn’t compare yourself to them. Things affect people in different ways. Everyone has _some_ sort of problem.”

I stepped back, letting Ithilcalad shimmer back to Noct’s inventory, and sighed.

“So can we start over?”

Her eyes hardened. “I could _never_ be friends with someone who openly defends Vayne.”

“What about Larsa?” Not-Ignis asked. He and Vaan and Penelo had come running, as well. “Is he not to be counted as a friend?”

Ashe glanced to the side, uneasy. “Larsa at least is willing to work for _peace_ rather than _war.”_

“And just because this young lady fancies Vayne-”

I squeaked in defiance. He shot me a look.

“Oh, don’t bother denying it. It’s written all over your face when he’s even _mentioned.”_

He looked back at Ashe and then to Vaan.

“But it doesn’t mean she always agrees with and endorses everything he does.”

I nodded.

“Uh, can I cut in here?” Noct scratched the back of his neck. “If we’re doing this, then… He’s not all bad. He’s taken care of _______ for me. She’s my sister and I _know_ we both care about her.”

“Well, obviously,” Not-Ignis said matter-of-factly. “Vayne’s first priority fighting that robot was _her,_ not the glory of battle. He ran right over to her.”

Ashe was starting to look guilty.

“I still don’t like it,” Vaan said, crossing his arms. His gaze landed on me. “Why’d it have to be _him?”_

“She’s got a type,” Noct answered casually as I sputtered embarrassingly.

“A _type,_ eh?” Not-Ignis did not look impressed. “You fancy the elegant yet _dominant_ type, then?”

 _“Noctis!”_ I said helplessly, blushing furiously.

“What’re you getting mad at _me_ for?” he shouted back.

 _“Why_ did you have to say that?!”

“He asked a question and I answered it!”

“It’s none of your damn _business!”_

“Oh dear, now there’s four of them,” Not-Ignis muttered, glancing at Penelo and Vaan.

“I have been called out,” I cried, now hiding behind Noctis. “I have been called out and rightfully so.”

“Get _off me,”_ Noctis said through gritted teeth. I was clinging to him, trying to hide my red and warm face. He bent over slightly.

“I _am_ sorry,” Ashe broke through our brotherly-sisterly bonding. I peeked over Noctis’ shoulder. “I shouldn’t have lost my temper. I wouldn’t wish what happened to me on anyone, especially what happened to you.”

“O-oh, uh…” I stuttered, still embarrassed that Not-Ignis had read me so easily. “Water under the bridge, y’know?”

“Still, I don’t approve of your… _attraction_ to Vayne. I don’t trust him and neither should you.”

“Too late for that, I’m afraid. I get attached real quickly.”

“Didn’t you say he was your…” Vaan searched for the phrase, “‘emotional support consul’?”

“Not you, too…”

“There we have it,” Not-Ignis said. He tried to lead his friends elsewhere. “Let the girl pine in peace.”

“I will boil your bones, Not-Ignis.”

He gave me a slightly disturbed look and then glanced to Noctis.

“Keep an eye on her,” he said. “I’m not sure another confrontation between these two would be good for either of them.”

Noctis nodded awkwardly. “Right. Will do.” He looked at me. “Come on. Let’s find you some place to cool down.”

I followed him with my arms crossed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You already know about my infatuation with Vayne, but it’s time to focus on the bond between Noct and Reader again. Here’s to hoping I can balance the two relationships.  
> Act 2, Ch. 4 is coming soon, right on schedule! This little upload schedule seems to be working :D So expect that chapter to come soon!


	54. In Memoriā

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader’s first stops with Materia’s warriors make for another culture shock and good ties with others.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter’s late!! I promise the next one won’t be - Act 2, Ch. 4 finally got released so we’re making good time.

After witnessing the almost-fight between me and Ashe, Y’shtola managed to convince me to join her and a few others on a small trip into the woods to get away from any more confrontation. Our group was fairly small, though most of Materia’s warriors had come down. Those of us going into the forest were better at ranged attacks. There was a purple haired child named Prishe, a tad obnoxious but bearable, another purple haired girl named Maria (she carried a bow), a white, dragonesque lady called Freya, a weather warrior named Auron, Vanille who had orangish-pink hair, Y’shtola, and I. Mog had told us beforehand that a potential ally was somewhere on this particular island. After he directed us, we went off.

The forest was rich with all shades of green. Brown branches and brambles coiled in and around the path we forged. As I was telling my cat-like friend about the things Vayne and I had witnessed on our journey, Prishe bounced from this tree to that, eager to explore. Vanille seemed to share her enthusiasm while Auron hung near the back with Freya, who occasionally made comments on our conversation.

Halfway through my tale of the Latin Scavenger Hunt, the hairs on the back of my neck stood up straight.

“I was hoping for a secret passage, y’know, ‘cause they’re super cool and then-” A switch flipped in my brain. I went on high alert and came to an abrupt halt.

“_______?” Y’shtola asked. “Are you alright?”

I paused before answering, head moving slightly to the right. Something wasn’t right. There was another presence somewhere in our vicinity.

“Do you guys feel that?” I asked quietly. Prishe’s head turned to look back at us.

“Feel what?” she asked.

“It’s like…” I waited for a sound. Nothing. “Wait, where are we?”

No one answered. A breeze drifted by, rustling the leaves of the trees. I wished a bird would chirp so the place would feel less empty. Silence reigned.

“We’re not lost…” Vanille said nervously. “Are we?”

“...It’s possible,” Maria said, gazing around at the small clearing we’d come into.

“Well, then we’ll just go back the way we came!” Prishe decided for us. “Come on, hurry! I’m pretty sure it was this way!”

“Wait, I don’t think-!” I began when she turned left instead of a full one-eighty degrees. She was gone before I could finish. “...that’s the right way…”

“It would fare well to catch up before she loses all of us,” Freya said. Several nods lead to our following Prishe’s lead.

_I wish Gladio was here. Bet he’d know the way out-_

Eyes were on me. When I looked around, I saw no one but my new acquaintances. Anxiety crept up my back and into my chest. I quickened my pace and hurried to Y’shtola.

“How are you feeling?” she asked. “I pray you haven’t exhausted yourself once more.”

“I think someone’s watching us,” I whispered. Auron glanced behind us. “That, or my anxiety decided to make a guest appearance.”

“Maybe our new ally?” Vanille suggested.

“Or a monster,” Freya said. “Stay on your guard.”

_Instincts, don’t fail me now._

Following Prishe had us going in circles. We’d come to one dead end of thick trees and thorny underbrush, turn around, and find another. I began to notice the same tree every other time we’d make another round. It didn’t look much different from the rest of the forest, but it did seem like it had a face. That did nothing to quell my rising fears. Anxiety decided to break out my old middle school fear of Slenderman. Every branch, every thin trunk, anything that took a remotely human form now had me shivering and huddling close to Y’shtola.

All throughout this, the feeling of being watched continued. It was like knowing someone had planted a camera in your room but you couldn’t figure out _where._ As I grew more scared, Vanille grew more exasperated. As the intense feeling of eyes boring into my head went on, Prishe became more frustrated.

Finally, we’d had enough.

“Not again…!” Prishe exclaimed. We had come to another deadend. “No matter which way we go, we just can’t get through!”

I sighed and leaned against a tree.

“It seems like we’re in the depths of the forest now,” Maria said.

“Indeed,” Freya said. “The structure has become unexpectedly complex.”

“We’ve walked quite a distance,” Auron observed. “Have we lost anyone?”

Y’shtola did a quick head count. “...No. Everyone is accounted for.”

“I’ve had enough of this place!” Prishe said, stomping her foot. “It’s taking ages just to find the way out.”

My mind suddenly made me away of ticks and bugs that could fall into my hair. I pulled my hood over my head.

“Let’s just knock these trees down and friggin’ make our _own_ path!”

Just as I was thinking of summoning some lightning so Noct would come and get us, a voice wafted out from the trees behind us.

“I would not do that,” it said. A… _something_ stepped out from the shadows. They must have been the one watching us. “You will only anger the wood.”

_What the fuck am I looking at._

She - they _looked_ like a she - stood taller than most women I’d seen. A very slender frame was clothed extremely lightly in what could be mistaken for lingerie. Her tan skin stretched all over her, ending in claws at her fingertips. However, none of those features was nearly as prominent as the two large _bunny ears_ protruding from the top of her head.

_What the fuck._

“Who are you?” Prishe asked. My eyebrows had furrowed into the same expression I’d had when I met Cait Sith.

“Are you familiar with these woods?” Y’shtola asked. She nudged me gently, as though reminding me to mind my manners. I did my best to seem _not_ confused.

“These are not the woods I know,” Bunny Lady said in an oddly accented voice. “But I can show you the way out.”

She turned and gestured to the path behind her.

“Walk that way and you will be free of this place.”

After she spoke, her eyes landed on me. A judging stare dug into my soul. I tensed.

“Just who are you?” Maria questioned, taking Bunny Lady’s attention away from me.

“You need not believe me if you wish not to do so,” she said. Her eyes flitted to me.

“I don’t feel like you would lead us astray…” Auron trailed.

“Such a feeling is for you to decide.”

“Well, let’s give it a try!” Prishe decided eagerly. “Not like we have any other choices.”

“You make a fair point,” Freya said. “Let us put our faith in this woman’s words.”

_So it_ is _a girl. She, I mean._

“Then I will be on my way,” Bunny Lady said.

“Why don’t you come with us?” Maria asked her. “There’s safety in numbers.”

“I must decline.”

“...I see,” Freya said respectfully. “Thank you for your help.”

“Are you sure?” Maria asked her. “Don't you think she could be a friend of someone? Is it okay for us to just leave her?”

“...I think she’ll be fine on her own,” Y’shtola said.

Freya nodded. “...Then we will take our leave. Until our paths meet again.”

“Yes,” Bunny Lady said cordially. “Until that time.”

With one last look at me, she disappeared into the woods. I stared after her, still utterly confused as to what I had just seen.

Blink, blink.

_What has my life become?_

“I take it you’ve not seen a viera before?” Y’shtola dragged me from my shocked thoughts. My cheeks heated up.

“Um, not really…” I muttered, turning away. I probably shouldn’t have stared at her like that. Oops…

“There are a manner of creatures and races on other worlds. On mine, we have many. The viera are one of them.”

“I feel blessed to live in such a diverse universe,” Freya said. Come to think of it, why wasn’t I shocked at seeing a _dragon lady?_

“It’s nice to know Earth wasn’t alone,” I said with a sad grin. Everyone began the trek back to the airship. “We spent so much time and research going into space exploration.”

My smile fell.

“I guess they’ll never get to find anything.”

“Space exploration?!” Prishe sounded amazed. “No way!”

“Well, yeah.” I blinked. “Do you guys… Is that not… What?”

“I wouldn’t call it something everyone strives for,” Y’shtola said with a slight laugh. “Though it does sound fascinating.”

“How would you even go up into space?” Maria questioned.

“Big spaceship,” I answered. I received several confused glances. “Like an airlocked airship but built for space and much stronger to withstand insane gravitational forces.”

“Common speak please?” Prishe asked.

“Big ship with extremely strong metal can withstand pretty much anything. With rocket boosters.”

“You should talk to Cid,” Y’shtola said. “One of Cloud’s friends. I’ve heard he strives to be the first man in space.”

“...It’s so weird to think about a world that _hasn’t_ been to the moon.”

“What?!” “No way!” “The moon?”

“Well, yeah. And _lots_ of satellites to neighboring planets.”

I received more astonished outbursts and exclamations. We spent the whole walk back with me doing my best to explain what I knew of the first moon landing and various planetary facts, all with a smile on my face.

 

Getting back felt great. I couldn’t wait to sit down and rest again. Everyone was glad to see us - we’d been gone for a while and they were close to trying to look for us. As my friends told them about the strange, ah, _viera,_ I looked around for the ship. I was only half-listening to the conversation.

And then Bunny Lady returned.

“It seems you made it out fine,” she said. I zoned back in, ready to _not_ stare so awkwardly. Her accented voice was one I could never mistake another for.

“Are you the mysterious lady who helped them out?” Zidane asked.

“Aha,” Not-Ignis said. “So it was you, Fran.”

_Oh great - another Ivalicean here to judge my choice in friends._

“You know her?” Cid asked. I had yet to approach him about space travel.

“But of course,” Not-Ignis said. “She’s my partner.”

I squinted.

_Wait a second._

“Huh?” Cid sounded stunned as well, but for other reasons. “This lady, _your_ partner?”

_I’m starting to see patterns…_

“If we had known you were partners,” Vanille said, “we would have brought you along!”

“I did not think you one to wander the earth so,” Fran teased Not-Ignis. “A sky-pirate flies, doesn’t he?”

_Sky-pirate… Animal-themed partner…_

“It’s nice to gaze up at the heavens once in a while,” Not-Ignis replied.

“What's the point in lyin'?” Cid said roughly. “Ain't got one fit for flyin' is all…”

“But if Balthier’s a sky pirate…” Zidane started.

“And Fran's his partner,” Vanille finished, “then that makes her one, too!”

_An empire and a princess…_

Edgar cut in, “If you knew Balthier was here, why didn't you join him?”

“You did not take Materia on her word,” Not-Ignis answered for her, “and were biding your time observing us until you were sure.”

“That's right,” Fran said.

_Princess travels with the vagabond thieves with a resistance behind her to fight the empire…_

“Well, if you're a friend of Balthier's, you're a friend of ours,” Zidane decided.

“That is up to Fran to decide,” Not-Ignis said.

“What is this?” I muttered to myself. _“Star Wars?”_

Fran’s eyes were on me instantly. Once more, they bore into me mercilessly. I swallowed and shrunk back.

“There is a foul stench about that one,” she said to Not-Ignis, not breaking her line of sight. He glanced to where she was looking. My uneasy and slightly frightened face amused him.

“Ah, yes,” he said. “She’s not from Ivalice but she _has_ made friends with a certain _emperor_ we know.”

Fran’s eyes narrowed. I got ready to step back.

“But there’s no need to worry! She’s perfectly safe as long as we keep her away from Ashe.”

“Any friend of _Vayne’s_ is not to be trusted,” Fran said simply. I stood frozen, unsure of how to react here. An alien humanoid with _rabbit ears_ was giving me the silent judgment treatment with her eyes.

“Yes, well, her brother is with us and I trust _him,_ at the least.”

“Wha- Hey!” I suddenly snapped out of it. I glared at him. “I will _steal_ your femurs, Not-Ignis.”

He sighed. “My name is _Balthier._ Whoever this ‘Ignis’ is, we are nothing alike.”

_Well, obviously. Ignis is a blessing and you are just… I don’t know but it weirds me out, otherworldly Han Solo._

It was at that moment some monsters decided to attack us. They were no match for us and it was then that Fran decided to join us. It made me even more uneasy and slightly guilty, having so many people disapprove of my presence simply for associating with one person.

_Time to spend all my time with Noctis so I seem fine again._

Once everyone loaded back up into the airship, Mog declared that we heading back to the Dark World. A planesgorger had been sensed there. I think he was hoping I’d be able to absorb its power again because he glanced in my direction. Or at least it looked like he did. I couldn’t tell; his eyes always seemed to be closed.

“So how’d the foresting go?” Noctis said, plopping down next to me. “They as good as Gladio?”

“Not really,” I said. “We got lost.”

I looked over at the Ivaliceans.

“Then that rabbit lady showed the way out and later judged me for my choice in friends.”

Noctis’ expression went from curious to complete bewilderment.

“Yep. Same.”

“Huh… She didn’t give you any trouble, did she?”

“Nope.”

“Good. Hey, I asked Mog how long it’d take to get where we’re goin’. I think we’ve got time for a quick nap.”

“Hell yes.”

 

I was woken up by Terra, Mog, and a nice girl named Yuna. She was very sweet and dressed in what I _think_ was a traditional Japanese dress. They informed us we had arrived. It felt strange to fall asleep during the day and be active in the dark. On Eos we had spent so much time trying to make sure we weren’t out at night.

The airship dropped us off within the limits of a desolate, broken city. There was rubble as far as the eye could see. What buildings still stood did not stand proudly, but gravely, ashamed. The only colors were grays and blacks and a faint blue outline along the architecture. Something about it made me think I’d seen it before.

The clouds hung heavy in the sky. Noctis and I walked not far behind Mog, Lightning, Yuna, and a few others. Once he got his bearings, a blank look overtook Noctis’ face. he was hiding something, some emotion. I could see the weight of it in his eyes.

“They’ve got poor taste,” Lightning criticized up ahead.

“You know this place?” a nice guy named Zack asked. He looked like a cross between Cloud and Noctis with spiky, black hair. “I feel like I’ve seen it before, too.”

He gazed around at the barren streets. Not even ghosts walked down them. An air of solemn depression made up the atmosphere of the city.

“I guess it reminds me of the slums… No, the slums were different. It wasn’t deserted like this. It was full of life.”

“It _used_ to be…” Noctis whispered. I gave him a worried glance. His fingers curled in and out.

_I wonder what’s wrong…_

“Maybe it’s part of the enemy’s plan,” a blond guy called Tidus suggested. His dad, Jecht, and a fellow warrior of Spiritus, stood behind him. “They might be trying to scare us.”

“Back in my world,” Lightning said, turning around to face them, “it took _years_ to reach this level of destruction. Even if someone purposefully made it this way, I won’t be shaken by it. What do you think?”

“Hmm… It’s complicated.”

“We have a city like this, too,” Jecht said. “But still… to look at ruins like these after all this time…”

“This is… a fake, right?” Yuna asked.

“If you’re asking about the shape of this world,” Mog answered, “that cloud over there is causing a huge distortion, kupo.”

My attention turned to the distance. What I thought were storm clouds were actually much closer to the ground. It was a mass of misty, dark gray. I didn’t like the feeling it gave me, like bugs crawling over my skin. I pulled my jacket tighter around me.

“This storm looks dangerous, kupo. Let’s search this town first!”

Mog then picked up the signal of another potential ally somewhere in the city. With them in mind, everyone headed out to explore. I turned to Noctis.

“Hey, you okay?” I asked. He had calmed down but now showed little to no emotion. Well, littler than usual. “Er, sorry, stupid question. How’re you feeling?”

He was silent for a moment, staring at the ground. Then he shook his head.

“It’s nothing,” he said. “I’m alright.”

He raised his head.

“Come on, let’s go before they leave us behind.”

As he walked forward, I sighed. Great. Just great. Noct was back to retracting his feelings.

_Back to square one._

 

We spread out in our efforts to explore the city. Noct and I followed the others to one end and back. He didn’t say much, though neither did I. The depressed mood grew over both of us until I anxiety crept along my skin. I did my best to ignore it.

Along the way, we found the ally Mog mentioned: Paine. She was a friend of Yuna’s, though no one remembered her. She wasn’t the most sociable person (relatable) and didn’t like others crowding her. Unfortunately that was people tried to do. This only caused more problems for Yuna, who felt awful that she couldn’t remember who Paine was or why she was so important to her. I wasn’t there when they found her, but I heard about it when Yuna came to talk to me. That was when I realized a difference between my own memory problems and everyone else’s.

“Um, _______?”

I had been watching Noctis as he gazed around solemnly. He said nothing and stood a ways away. Yuna had approached me quietly. I gave her a questioning blink.

“I wanted to ask you… about your own missing memories…”

“Oh, uh, sure,” I said, awkwardly shifting my weight. “What about ‘em?”

She paused. “...You regained them, right?”

“Yep.”

“And before that, you didn’t remember the friends you had here. Did it… Did it bother you? Did you know they were important to you?”

I stuck my hands in my pockets. “Ah, well… Kinda, yeah. I knew some people were familiar. But honestly, it scared me more than anything - er, well, not _scared,_ but unnerved. It’s like… trying to recall something from early childhood.”

She nodded. “That’s how it feels to me, too. But I feel terrible I’ve forgotten. I never even noticed how much was missing.”

“Yeah… It’s hard to see until it’s right in front of you. And even then, you might not even see it until something happens to _make_ you see it.”

I pulled out the rook from my pocket.

“Vayne gave me this last time we met. When I saw him again, my memories were shot but… when I noticed it in my pocket, I _knew_ it was really important to me. I just couldn’t remember _why._ ...Then later everyone kept referencing the last time we were here. It made me think ‘hmm, well, maybe I _have_ been here?’ But then…”

“You thought you would’ve remembered it.”

“Exactly. I hate to think how hurt he might’ve felt…”

“I feel the same with Paine. She seems nice, and I know she knows me, but… I don’t know _her.”_

“It’s rough, huh…”

“But I’ve also noticed… You’re the only one of Spiritus’ warriors who has had their memories taken. I can't help but wonder… why you and why the rest of us?”

“...Y’know, I probably should’ve asked that when I saw him. I’ll add it to the list of complaints I want to file.”

She laughed. “I am glad you and Cecil and Hope regained yours, though. I do hope to find my own brilliance soon…”

I gave her a smile. “Patience is key. Trust me.”

“I’ll try to remember that. Thank you.”

Once she had left to return to her friends, my attention switched back to Noctis. To everyone else he seemed his usual aloof self. To me, though, well… I could see the heaviness in his eyes. It wasn’t from lack of sleep. Did this city remind him of what had happened in Altissia? It did the same to me. Unfortunately, there was no changing the past, however much I wanted to.

Still, I hadn’t seen Noctis like this since Niflheim took over all of Lucis. Concern and compassion filled my heart and I made my way through the rubble and settled dust.

“Noct,” I said softly. We were far enough away from people that they wouldn’t hear.

“Yeah?” he answered dully. I gathered my courage to press the issue gently.

“I won’t push you, but… Something’s clearly bothering you. Do you wanna talk about it?”

“...”

His silence caused my worry to grow. I waited patiently, fiddling with a piece of stone from a nearby falling building corner.

“...It’s just… Everyone here seems to know this place. And I… I’m not exactly excluded, y’know?”

_...Oh. Right._

“It just… reminds me of… Insomnia.”

My heart ached when he spoke. My hand reached out to grab his gloved left one. I squeezed it. He gave me a half-hearted squeeze in return.

_What would Prompto do to cheer him up?_

_Should I cheer him up?_

_What would Ignis do…? Hmm…_

“Do you…” I paused to make sure I was doing the right thing. “Do you need some time to… Do you need to be alone for a bit? Process seeing it all again?”

He thought it over and nodded slowly.

“Yeah…” he answered quietly. “That- That’d be good. Will you, uh, cover for me?”

I sent him an encouraging smile. “Of course. Just don’t go too far, okay? Be careful.”

“I know, I know. I will. I won’t be long. It’s just… hard, seeing it all again so sudden.”

“I know… We’re all here for you if you need us, okay? Or just me, if you don’t want to talk to them. Or if you don’t want to talk at all.”

“Yeah, I know. And, thanks.”

“You need a hug, or…?”

“...Nah, I’m good. I’ll just… I won’t be long. I’ll catch up.”

“Okay... Be careful.”

“I will.”


	55. The Thing About Materia and Spiritus...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots of people are having problems with their memories...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter features several cutscenes from Act 2, Chapter 4. Reader's reactions are my own thoughts that I had while I watched them :D  
> (hopefully I'm on time with uploading this time 'round lol)  
> Note: Silver Boy is Hope from FFXIII

Leaving Noctis behind set a pit in my stomach. With every step, I felt more and more that I needed to hurry back to him. I knew he wanted to be left alone for a bit, though, so I let him be. Even so, it didn’t _feel_ like he should be alone. That notion was pushed to the back of my mind along with the sense that if I left him for too long, something bad would happen. I trusted Noct. He was capable. He would make it back.

Walking through the ruined city seemed to leave everyone with a feeling of melancholy. It reminded me of my home, my planet, my world. All gone, destroyed, left to crumble like this city. I sighed and tried to think of something else before I started crying again.

Up ahead, I spotted a group of my new friends. I only recognized Yuna. When I got near them, a Torsion opened. A strange man with cerulean blue hair stepped out. His attire reminded me of several of Yuna’s friends, who looked tropical. I didn’t know who he was either. Everyone went on their guard. I assumed he wasn’t exactly a friend.

“...doubt anyone called you,” a blond kid said. “To what do we owe the pleasure?”

“I came to tell you about this woman,” Tropical Blue said. “Who she is and her connection to you.”

I joined the group and quietly stood behind a small child with purple hair.

_My life has become an anime._

“Well, you’re no friend of mine,” a woman with gray hair retorted. “...Though I guess I know as much about you than anyone else…”

_That must be Paine. Interesting name._

“Spiritus told me about what happened after I perished,” Tropical Blue continued.

Wait, “perished?” There are dead people here?

“After defeating Sin, the legendary summoner cast aside her responsibilities… And embarked on a journey with you. All for the purpose of fulfilling a selfish wish.”

Tropical Blue shook his head as though disappointed with Yuna and her friend.

“Though the people were counting on her to be their strength, she betrayed their hopes.”

I nearly got whiplash as the memories of Caius and the model solar system crumbling to the ground around me came sprinting to the front of my mind.

“Just how many despaired, I wonder...”

_No... I swear I didn’t abandon them!! It was the Astrals who took me away!!_

“I would _never...!”_ Yuna protested.

“And what’s worse...” Tropical Blue kept going. “You’ve completely forgotten and have immersed yourself in self-sacrifice once more.”

_Shut up. Don’t talk to my friend like that._

“Don’t listen to him, Yuna,” Laguna told her. He was one of the people who came across Noct, so I knew his name, at least. “I have a bad feeling about what he’s saying.”

“You came here just to say that?” Blond Kid accused Tropical Blue. “Don’t you have anything better to do?”

_Yeah! Get lost!!_

“Do you think anyone will believe what you’re saying?”

Trop. Blue’s eyes flickered to me and then back to Yuna. “She knows this to be truth.”

Yuna gasped, appalled at herself. “What?! Did I _do_ something like that?!”

Paine was quick to draw her sword. “Wanna get hurt?”

Small Purple Child piped up, “That’s right! If you bully Yuna, I won’t forgive you.”

Everyone else drew their weapons. My eyes narrowed at Trop. Blue.

_Choose your next words wisely, you fucking **wet** sock._

“That’s fine with me...” Tropical Blue said coolly. “Let chaos consume you.”

This time, I joined in the fighting.

 

Honestly, despite how many of us there were, this guy _still_ put up a good fight. No wonder Spiritus had brought him back from the dead. Somehow. I didn’t get how that worked. Anyway, I stayed mostly out of the way when I could, slashing at monsters and Manikins that Trop. Blue called to his side. I kept an eye on him, though, when I could. I didn’t like him picking on Yuna like that, not when I knew how it felt.

He lost, thankfully. In his defeat, he stood once more to face my friend.

“You are strong, Lady Yuna,” he said. “Your will is still firm. To you, I’m someone who should not exist, aren’t I?”

“What do you mean?” Yuna asked bravely.

“You think some people deserve to exist, while others don’t. That man, for example, is one you believe should exist.”

_Isn’t that how everyone thinks, deep down?_

“What are you rambling on about, Seymour?” Tidus demanded.

“Let me remind you what happened,” Seymour suggested. “You went on a journey with her to save him.”

He was, of course, referring to Paine.

“You selfishly decided who deserved to live and did not. “You cared not for the others who perished and thought only of your own emotions.”

“He’s wrong,” Paine cut in. “Don’t listen to him.”

“Am I? Did the grand summoner not embark on a journey to find clues of this man’s whereabouts?”

“So what? In the end, Yuna-”

She paused, conflicted on what to let Yuna know. I took the opportunity to overcome my anxiety.

“How is that selfish?” I asked. My voice sounded more solid than I felt. My heart pounded at directly challenging a strong enemy I didn’t know very well. I did my best to quell the shaking in my limbs. “How is trying to save someone you care about selfish?”

Seymour’s eyes trained themselves on me. I awkwardly glanced at a devastated Yuna and back.

“Like, I get that she traded in responsibility for it, but everyone needs a break once in a while, y’know? There's nothing wrong with thinking of your own needs.”

I fully looked to Yuna.

“There’s nothing wrong with caring for you own happiness. _Especially_ if it affects your everyday life. Yuna, I don’t... really know what exactly’s going on, but I _do_ know that it’s perfectly okay to prioritize your own happiness every damn once in a while. It’s not selfish. It’s healthy, even.”

I fired my best glare at Seymour.

“So who the hell are you to tell someone what they should and shouldn’t do? You’re _dead,_ right? Why the hell should _you_ care?”

He said nothing to address most of what I’d just said. He only smirked and said, “Well, I suppose you would know all about that, wouldn’t you, __________?”

Anger boiling up, I summoned Ithilcalad, held it with both hands, and pointed the tip at him. _“Don’t. Even. Think about it.”_

“Dammit!” Paine joined me in the exclamations. “I’m gonna _hurt you!”_

“But of course,” Seymour waved her off. “Next we meet.”

He disappeared in a quick flash. I growled quietly and let my sword dissipate. Now I was shaking for another reason.

_Coward. Running away before I can tear you a new one._

“Taking advantage of the blanks in someone’s memories…” Ramza and some others had joined us during the fight. “How knavish. And there’s nothing we can do about it.”

“You were…” Tidus turned to Yuna, “looking for me?”

“I don’t know,” Yuna whispered. “I can’t remember. Did I really do something for my own sake?”

“No!” Paine was quick to jump in. “He’s wrong!”

“Calm down, Paine,” a nice teacher lady said. Her name was Quistis, if I recall correctly. “There’s no point in pushing yourself.”

“H-hey,” I shakily brought up. “Remember what I said?”

Paine turned on us. “You guys have _no idea_ what’s going on here.”

“But it is because of that,” Freya said calmly, “we can be of help.”

“Why not explain it to us?” Ramza suggested. “If we understand what’s going on, there might be something we can do.”

Ramza, Freya, and Quistis were led some feet away to quietly get their explanation. I was more concerned with Yuna, seeing as I understood how she might be feeling. Somewhat. I waited until everyone was gathered around Paine before gently approaching her.

“Yuna...?” I said softly. She was staring at the ground, lost in thought and the words of a man I just _knew_ was trying to get under her skin. “You okay?”

“How... could I?” she muttered. “Surely I wouldn’t do something like... ...Would I?”

“Hey, remember: your own happiness is just as important as anyone else’s. ...But I get how you feel. Really.”

She raised her head to look at me. I noticed her eyes were two different colors, one green, one blue.

“Did you feel this way?” she asked quietly. “When you realized your memories were missing?”

I shifted my weight, trying to figure out how best to phrase my own little tale.

“I think...” I licked my lips. “I think my situation was a bit different... but...”

_Just admit already. If you keep it up, you’ll come to accept it._

I sighed. “My home was destroyed. I had spent a month looking forward to getting back only to be told it was gone. It probably would’ve killed me if I hadn’t come here. But still... This guy on Spiritus’ side decided it would be nice to show me a model solar system of my world only to have it literally crumble in my arms.”

“That’s awful...!”

“Yeah...” I looked up at the sky. “Our conversation let on a lot about what I was missing. I kept wondering why I would forget such a thing. Why would I? _How_ could I? It would’ve torn me apart had Vayne not been there.”

Yuna nodded. “I see... That’s exactly how I feel, but there’s more. How could I just abandon the people like that? Was finding Tidus... really that important? And where had he gone? Did I ever find out? I can’t... And Paine, seeing her just makes my heart ache. How could I forget someone so important to me?”

“It’s hard, I know. But you’ll get those memories back or I will fight Materia, I swear.”

She laughed weakly. “Thank you, ________. It’s nice to have such good friends as you and the others.”

I couldn’t help the smile that forced its way onto my face.

 

“...Paine does not want you to rush to get your memories of her back. Regaining one’s lost memories is no easy feat.”

Freya and the others had returned with a message Paine could not voice herself. Which, to be honest, was a _whole mood._

“Moreover, it is difficult to bear the sight of someone trying so hard...”

_Huh? Is that why Vayne was always so melancholy when I had my episodes?_

“She wishes for you to be positive. That is all.”

Be positive...” Yuna stared at the ground. “But is that enough...?”

She sent me a pleading glance. I gave her a supportive thumbs-up and a small smile.

“Seymour’s story is extreme,” Ramza said. “You ought not to put too much thought into it.”

“My head hurts just remembering it...” Tidus shook his head frustratedly. “There’s no point in thinking at a time like this.”

With a reluctant resolve, Yuna stood up straight.

“I understand it won’t be easy, but...” she paused. “I’ll give it a try.”

I cheerfully clapped my hands. “That’s the spirit!”

Satisfied that everyone had come to an agreement, we decided to continue on our way.

“Uh, hey, _______?” Laguna stopped. “Where’s Noctis?”

_...Shit._

I hadn’t had time to come up with a cover story.

“O-oh, he, uh...” I fiddled with the ends of my jacket. “He had... something to do. Just, uh, looking around. It’s an interesting city. He said he’d catch up. I trust him.”

“...Oh, okay. Uh, you sure he should be out there alone?”

“Yeah! Noct’s capable. You’ve seen him in action.”

“Well, alright then. If you say so...”

_Please don’t be suspicious and think I killed him or something._

Waiting for Noctis to return sent me into a wave of fresh anxiety. I didn’t like being on my own. Yes, I had Terra and Y’shtola - even Yuna - but I didn’t know them as well as Noct. I didn’t fully know how to interact with them; what I could say, what I shouldn’t. And Vayne had visit. With both of them gone, I felt alone again. It didn’t help that I’d be singled out even more.

As we furthered our way into the abandoned city, I kept to myself. ...Okay, maybe not exactly. I kept somewhat close to Yuna to make sure she was alright. Even so, I stayed away from the group, unsure of how welcome I’d be. Awkwardness practically dripped off of me if I got too close. Even thinking about actively joining in the socialization sent my heart into nervous flips. So, I remained on the outskirts of each clump of people.

And then I heard some of them talking about me.

“...-en there’s Noctis’ friend,” a boy with silver hair was saying solemnly. Everyone in his little group looked pretty serious at that moment. “She’s the only one of Spiritus’ warriors that’s had her memories erased, right?”

“...It is rather odd,” a guy in purple, dragonesque armor said. He was Cecil’s friend. Kain, I think.

“...She _is_ one of Spiritus’, right?”

No one answered. My stomach dropped. That didn’t strike me as a good reaction.

“Maybe we should ask her? She seems nice enough.”

_Oh no. No, no, please don’t interrogate. I don’t know anything, okay? Other than that there’s a portal to Spiritus and Materia’s world in the big castle... That’s kind of important..._

_But Vayne said not to tell anyone._

_But we can tell Noctis, right?_

_I don’t think so._

_...But it wouldn’t hurt to... Right?_

“Hey! __________!”

I jumped. Jecht was, of course, the loudest of the four guys gathered.

“Get over here! We’ve got somethin’ to ask ya.”

I shuffled my way over. My feet parked me next to Silver Boy as he seemed the nicest.

“We were talking about the deal with everyone’s memories,” Silver Boy began, “And we were wondering... about which god summoned you here.”

“Oh, uh,” I shifted myself a little. “Honestly, lately, I’ve been questioning that, but Spiritus told me _he_ summoned me. Of course, he could be lying, but...”

“That’s kinda the opposite of the rest of us,” Jecht told me. I tilted my head in confusion.

“Jecht and myself are also belonging to Spiritus,” Kain explained. “But our memories have been completely filled in. They are not all good things. ...Within them lie resentment, hatred, a longing for unfulfilled wishes... It seems Spiritus thinks those things give us power in battle.”

“...In this world,” Silver Boy said, “a person’s emotional strength becomes their power. I wonder if it’s the same for negative emotions, too.”

“You, though,” Jecht added, speaking to me, “you’re somethin’ else.”

“Oh, well that’s easy,” I said. “My own strife just makes me less motivated and really depressed.”

Squall turned his head to look a couple of his own friends before looking back to us.

“Maybe it’s better to fight without any memories,” he said thoughtfully.

I shrugged. “It helped me. Though, I guess it is kinda weird for Spiritus. I hitched a ride with Noct last time I was here, so... I don’t really know what happened this time around. Maybe I made an impression on Spiritus or something.”

“He seems to be very good at using people’s emotions,” Kain said.

The memory of Spiritus repeatedly pissing me and Vayne off surfaced. “Yeah... I’ll say...”

“What about Materia?” Jecht asked. “Were you told anything?”

“I think a lot of our comrades were already in this world when they came to,” Silver Boy said. “But it seems Materia’s become more cautious since the World of Light’s crystal core shattered,” he awkwardly glanced at me, “telling everyone about the situation since.”

“Uh, sorry, not sorry about that...” I said nervously, scratching my head.

“...The gods originally made this world as a place of respite for us,” Kain said.

“So does she think losing our memories is going to make us happy?” Jecht questioned. “...And here _I_ thought I was a dunce at emotions! This is like Ace’s world where you have to fight even after you’ve forgotten things.”

“Well, _______ 's story checks out,” Silver Boy said. “I think.”

“I guess?” I said. “I feel a lot better for some reason now, though. Having everything together feels a lot nicer.”

“Forgetting... makes you happier...” Silver Boy seemed lost in thought. Then he perked up. “That reminds me!”

“What?”

“...But there’s no way... No. If that’s the case...”

“We can’t hear you when you mumble,” Jecht accused. “Care to share with the rest of the class?”

“Um... I might have told you that I’m a lot older than I look...”

_Oh yeah, I heard about that. Some people are in their younger bodies. Which is weird. Can’t say I like that thought._

“You said you chose that appearance,” Squall said further.

“Yes,” Silver Boy said. “And at that time...”

He looked down.

“I remember Materia helping me...”

The silence was nearly suffocating to me. I suddenly felt like I was missing a very _important_ memory. _Again._

_What the hell? What **is** this place?_

“Are you suggesting,” Kain started, “Spiritus has the power to give memories, and Materia has the power to take them, and give respite?”

_No. There’s no way. Then who the hell summoned me?!_

Thankfully, I wasn’t the only one who was enraged by this.

“So what then?!” Jecht suddenly demanded. “Are we supposed to just leave her be even when Yuna’s suffering?!”

“I concur,” I said through gritted teeth. A deep breath drifted into my lungs and back out.

_Don’t cause another storm._

“It’s just a theory,” Silver Boy said calmly, “but maybe the memories Materia took from us were being held by Spiritus. And now those memories are manifesting themselves in this world as brilliance.”

A switch went off in my brain for the millionth time since coming here. The missing piece returned as a flood. My mind tuned everything out as they continued talking...

 

_“As much as I hate to admit it...” Materia said. “You had use in the last cycle.”_

_I crossed my arms, eye twitching. “Okay...? So... what, you willingly summoned me this time...?”_

_Materia’s pride caused her to pause for a moment._

_“I know we’ve had our differences,” she said, “but I know you care about others’ wellbeing just as I do.”_

_“I guess, yeah...”_

_“So I would like to make you an offer.”_

_I tilted my head and blinked._

_“I had suspicions that Spiritus was planning to summon you himself. And seeing as you and I are not on the best of terms, I would you go to him. But I have a favor to ask.”_

_I nodded for her to keep going. Was this really worth my time?_

_“Fight for both of us. I hate to ask it, merely for my distaste of Spiritus himself, but... I think it would work better that way. If I could help you retain your happiness, you could go where you please as his command.”_

_“‘Retain my happiness’?” I repeated, angry tears coming to my eyes. “The hell does that mean?! What happiness do I even **have?!”**_

_“A fitting question, for both of you,” another voice shuddered through the dome. Spiritus’ face came up by way of the interdimensional Skype call. “But I’d rather my little healer not be **your** agent, Materia.”_

_“Spiritus...!” Materia’s voice shivered with hatred. “What is it you want this time?”_

_Have they seriously not learned to get along? God, just fuck already. Or fight, Whatever, I don’t care._

_“I have called to demand you hand one of my warriors over.”_

_“She is not **yours,** Spiritus!” Materia argued. “Since the last time she was here, she has been mine.”_

_“Oh really? And what, pray tell, must have caused her to join my side, then? Fighting against those you deem yours?”_

_“It was your own warrior that turned her!”_

_“Precisely, which is why I am here. ________, he is here, if you wish to see him.”_

_My heart jumped. I must’ve visibly brightened because Spiritus laughed._

_“I thought as such. And if you have no other tie to Materia, then I believe we have business to discuss.”_

_“You would not want her in the state she is in,” Materia growled. “Only I can fix it.”_

_“And what state would that be? Angry and in despair at such devastating loss?”_

_My heart sank at the reminder. More tears burned in the corner of my eyes._

_“She could use that to her advantage.”_

_“If she continues as she is now, she will break even further!”_

_“Then let her! Let her use that hatred, that boiling resentment for those who committed such a heinous crime.”_

_Spiritus looked to me._

_“You could have revenge, if you wanted. I can give you that power.”_

_“For what?” I said with a dull voice. “It’s not going to bring my home back. It will feel good for, what, ten seconds, and everything I lost will still be gone.”_

_“But you will have saved your brother’s world.”_

_“...Why should I listen to you? Either of you? All you do is fight and it’s **fucking** annoying. I know you just want my power. You want as much power as you can. And for what? To save this world? What’s the fucking point? You’re the only ones here.”_

_“Your brother has yet appear,” Spiritus said. “You could potentially save him two times over should you join me. Once with this world, twice with the power to destroy the Astrals once and for all. Peace would be on Eos once you have done so. Ardyn will be no match for you and Noctis at the same time. The empire would fall. Noctis could unite everyone under one flag. With ‘liberty and justice for all.’”_

_It was like a knife had just twisted into my heart. I didn’t like Spiritus using something from home against me. I didn’t like it **one bit.**_

_“And what can you give me?” I asked Materia hopelessly. “More fighting? A chance to see friends again? Friends who will have to deal with this?”_

_I gestured to myself. Materia gripped her staff more tightly and gave me her best dignified look._

_“I can you respite from the pain in your heart, in your soul,” she said kindly. “I can give you_ **hope.”**

 

“________? Are you okay? We’re continuing on. Don’t think too much about what I said. It was just a theory.”

I resurfaced from my thoughts in a panic. I jolted from the memory with a newfound urgency. My heart started pumping adrenaline. Someone _needed_ to know what I had just remembered. I needed to tell someone. I knew exactly who to tell, but he was far away. Time to start the search. I took a stance like I was about to run off.

“Woah, hey, you good?” Jecht asked.

“I have to find Noctis,” I said. “I have to find him. I’ll be right back!”

Without looking back, I began sprinting back the way we came.

“Where are you going?!” someone shouted. “You can’t go off alone!”

“I’ll portal back!!” I called back. “If I’m not back in two hours, call Vayne!”

Thankfully, no one chased after me.


	56. How To Not Train Your Dragon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The search for Noctis is... uh... well, it’s going, that’s for sure.

“Noctiiiis!!! Nooooct!”

I’m fairly certain I took a wrong turn at some point during my run through the city. I mean, I’d been looking for _at least_ fifteen minutes. Surely Noct would have heard me by then.

“Noctiiiis!” I called for the umpteenth time. “Noooct!”

_Still_ nothing. Juuust great.

_Dammit, he couldn’t have gotten that far, right? He would know not to get too far away from the group… right?_

Everything looked the same. Every building had the same pattern. The streets were littered with rubble and laid out the same way. Various squares and centers had long since crumbled. There weren’t any landmarks to recognize. All the while, the storm in the distance Mog had been wary of grew and grew. I kept my eye on it as I searched. Hopefully Noctis had enough sense to stay away from it.

Several times I was set upon by monsters. They varied in form and none of them really made an impression in my mind. I was able to fend them off by myself, though it did leave me a little more weary than before. Or at least, I did at first.

I had made it to a much bigger square than I had seen thus far. Other than its size, it didn’t look much different than anything else in this damned city. Rubble lied at the base of the buildings surrounding it. Matted, dying grass grew in the center where some landscapers tried to put some bushes and benches to make the place seem nicer. Those bushes were now dead and the benches were slightly cracked. I walked to the center and gazed around. Some of the streetlights here still stood, prompting a famous Journey song to pop into my head.

I began humming “Don’t Stop Believing,” afraid someone (or some _thing)_ would hear me. As the song went on, I grew more confident. After all, everyone else was far ahead. Only Noctis would hear me if he was nearby. So, bit by bit, I let the lyrics flow out into the dusty air.

“Workin’ hard to get my fill!” I sang quietly as I continued my way down a narrow alley. “Everybody _wants_ a thriiill… Payin’ anything to roll the dice, just one more time…!”

I performed my only little magic show as I went along. I let the bursts of fire, ice, and storm climb higher and higher. Maybe Noctis would see it and come investigating.

“Some’ll win… Some will lose…”

Now I was dancing slightly. But only _slightly._ It was mostly just shimmying my way down the streets and waving my arms to the (lack of) music.

I sharply turned on my heel and pointed behind me. “Some are born to _sing_ the bluuuees…”

I righted myself and kept bouncing on my feet down the rest of the street.

“Oh, the movie never ends. It goes on and on and on and on.”

I heard a growl. Enemies nearby. I pointed in their direction, continuing my music video.

“Strangers… waitin’...”

I moved my arm from behind me to to gesture ahead.

“Up and down the boulevard. Their shadows… searchin’ in the niiight…”

The guitar riff played in my head as the monsters emerged from their hiding spots.

“Streetlights…” I pointed to the dumbed down mindflayers. “People…”

They prepared their life-taking magic.

“Livin’ just to _find emotion!_ Hidin’ somewhere in the _niiiighhht!”_

I launched myself at the not-daemon mindflayers as I sang the last word of that lyric. Steep met gray flesh as I started the chorus.

_“Don’t_ stop-!” I drew my sword back and stabbed into another flayer. “Bel _ievin’!”_

I spun around, swinging my sword in a wide half circle to hit the first one again.

“Hold on to that- ugh… just die already, damn it.”

It perished and I turned on the second, setting upon it with a frozen blade.

_“Feel_ iiiingg…”

This one lasted a bit longer, long enough to hit me with dark magic. I coughed at the smoky magic cloud and brought Ithilcalad down on it in one fell blow. Boom. Dead.

I sighed. “Streetlights… People… Guess the moment’s over, huh? You guys _ruined_ my mini concert!”

No answer.

“I’d expect an answer, but you’re dead. Alright… Let’s find Noctis…”

Not bad, right? I survived that one. But my luck wouldn’t last.

I turned down another street, trying to remember where I left Noctis to join the others. Occasionally I’d call his name, but it was drawing enemies to me and I wasn’t about that. I did crack down a bolt of lightning. Hopefully Noct saw _that._

As I strolled past an alley, happy to be alone, myself, I heard rustling. I paused. More rustling. Taking a peek into the alley wouldn’t hurt. What if it led to Noct? So my feet cautiously approached the opening.

“Noct?” I asked. “You there? Are you hurt?”

No one answered. There was no groaning or other sounds of pain, so I assumed it wasn’t a person.

“Hello…?”

Something burst from the stone bricks that filled the alley. I took one look at it… And…

“Awww…!”

I stepped forward. Two, green, mini dinosaurs had emerged, shaking off themselves the dust on their scales. They were small, maybe about half my height, and didn’t look all that dangerous.

“Hello there! You’re so _cute!”_

I crouched down and held my left hand out. They eyed me curiously. I stretched my arm out a little further.

“It’s okay! I won’t bite! Man, I wish I’d known sooner this place doubled as Jurassic Park or I would’ve come looking for you sooner!”

One sniffed my hand, coaxing the other to come forward as well.

“Life finds a way, huh, little guy? I can sing you the Jurassic Park theme if you want.”

They made little trilling dinosaur sounds, like they were talking to each other.

“Man, life finds a way. Even in a place like this it still does- _OW.”_

_Sharp teeth_ dug into my hand. I swear I felt something tear. The pain had my eyes watering. Unwilling to get my hand _shredded,_ I pushed the dino off me and scrambled to my feet. My hand was bleeding, bite marks oozing.

“Shit, that _hurt._ What the hell-? Oh sHIT-!”

I was set upon by tiny dinosaur babies. At least they weren't full-sized T-rexes. I did have to run, though. Using a sword would be difficult with an injured hand. But the dinos were fast and brought friends. I sprinted down the street, narrowly avoiding tripping over stones and fallen bricks.

_Oh, this isn’t good, this isn’t good!!_

I stumbled past a fallen column, losing a bit of speed. Those things had turned rabid _fast._ Just as I turned right to lose those little gremlins, I was set upon by much scarier foes. They reminded me of the claw daemons from Costlemark. I halted immediately. This was all happening much too quickly. Taking a few steps back, my mind tried to get a grasp on just _what_ was going on.

“U-um…” I stuttered, starting to get really scared. “S-sorry to- to b-b-bother y- sorry to both- sorry…”

The monster growled. I turned to dash away right as it pounced, claws extended towards me. I tripped on a rock and couldn’t keep my balance. Instincts took over and my body rolled to the left right as the creature made contact. I inhaled sharply. More stinging pain pierced my side. Somehow the monster had managed to get right between myself and my jacket. Though my hand still hurt from being bitten, I summoned Ithilcalad and used to shove the thing off me. Ice _blew_ out from my hands as I scrambled to get to my feet. My heart felt like it was going to give out.

I tripped again, but held myself somehow. When I glanced back, I noticed the monster’s feet had been frozen to the ground. Without thinking, I fled again, this time wincing with every step from the gash in my side. Tears pricked my eyes.

_It hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts._

_Just. Keep. GOING._

With an abrupt turn left, I forced myself down an alleyway and into the next street over. I began to slow down, thinking that was a good enough distance from those _things._

A loud _bang!_ went off near me. I panicked and picked up my pace again, starting to sprint down the road. Only it wasn’t exactly unoccupied. I slammed into someone, nearly barreling over them. Thankfully he steadied himself in time. The wind was knocked out of me though.

“I’m so sorry!” My Apology Spiel began. “I’m sorry; I wasn’t looking where I was going and there were monsters chasing me and-!”

“You need to slow down, darling. You are perfectly safe with me.”

_“Oh, thank GOD.”_

My arms latched themselves to Vayne instantly. His were left open, waiting for me to be done. He sighed impatiently.

“Yes, well…” he muttered. “Whenever you are finished…”

When I tried to squeeze him tighter my hand stung. I hissed at the pain and retracted my hands. The left was the bitten one. It did not look good. As soon as Vayne saw it, he took it in his own two gloved ones to inspect it. Blood stained my palm and fingers, everywhere, especially around the wound itself. The dinosaur had left a fairly deep bite mark and by that I mean, it wasn’t _too_ deep, but it wasn’t shallow either. I could only look at for so long before feeling panic at the sight of a hand wound, one of my worst fears.

Vayne sighed again. “I’m beginning to think I should steal you away again. Every time I leave, you get into trouble. _Every_ time.”

“I wish Ignis was here,” I said, taking my hand back. “He’s, like, eighty-five percent of Noct and I’s impulse control.”

Vayne did not look impressed. “And the other fifteen percent?”

“Gladio.”

He sighed for the third time.

“And where exactly _is_ your brother?” he asked. My mind went blank. It was quiet for a solid five seconds before I remembered what I had been doing.

“...Has it been two hours already?” I asked, finally looking up at him. He sent me a confused expression.

“Whatever do you mean?”

“I told the other people to call you if I wasn’t back in two hours. Noct wasn’t doing so good with the city here so I asked him if he wanted some time alone and he said yes. He’s been gone for too long, though. I went looking for him.”

_“Alone?”_

“Um… Yes…?”

Vayne brought a hand to his forehead, trying to comprehend my actions.

“Do you _ever_ think before you act?” he asked.

“Um… Yes. Usually. I like to call my ‘cautiously reckless,’ though. Noct is just normal reckless. Together we form exactly Two brain cells.”

“Reckless is still _reckless._ You ought to _think_ more thoroughly of your actions _beforehand._ You could have _easily_ been overwhelmed by monsters. I’ve no idea what happens if we were to perish. _Do_ be more _considerate_ next time…!”

If I was an animal, my ears would have flattened back on my head in shame at being scolded. He was right, as per usual, but…

“Noct’s out here all alone,” I said quietly. “I didn’t want anyone to worry and I didn’t want to get in the way, so… I didn’t want to stop the whole caravan just to search for one person…”

Vayne’s stare bore down on me like the sun in a heat wave. I felt myself begin to slowly shrunk back. We stayed like that for a moment. Then, he closed his eyes and turned his head slightly.

“From what I know of them,” he told me, “they would have gladly stopped to help you find him. That is no excuse for putting yourself in harm’s way.”

“But - _anxiety-”_

“Is an _obstacle_ you must _force_ yourself to push past.” His eyes found mine again. “I understand it is difficult, but you _must_ give thought to _yourself_ every now and again. It would do no good to anyone if you were hurt in a situation that could have been easily preventable.”

…Yuna’s whole ordeal with finding Tidus suddenly made a _lot_ more sense. I mean, I still didn’t know what happened but… Vayne’s words reminded me of what I’d said to her.

“I’m sorry…” I whispered, head down. He quickly used his hand to bring it up again.

_“I_ am not who you should be apologizing to,” he said softly yet sternly. “Apologize to _yourself.”_

“...Why?”

A stricken gleam flashed through his eyes like lightning, gone as soon as it had come. It was like he couldn’t understand how I couldn’t be nice to myself.

“I see…” he said slowly, as if he had come to a grave realization. “So the only person your kindness does _not_ extend to is yourself.”

I blinked several times, unsure of how to feel about him reading me so easily.

“Uhhh… I mean don’t really like Kefka all that much…” I deflected. Vayne sighed.

“That is _not_ the _point,”_ he emphasized. “But this is not something that can be fixed easily.”

Still embarrassed, I shifted my weight only to be met with the pain of my other injury. I winced and subconsciously tried to put pressure on the gash through my jacket. The material of it wasn’t thin but the cut fabric of my shirt could be felt through it. That let me know it was worse than I thought. Yet… I didn’t want Vayne to worry more than he already was. If I found Noctis, he’d give me a potion (hopefully) and that would fix everything.

“So can we find Noct?” I asked quietly. “I don’t know where he is and I’ve been searching for, like, thirty minutes.”

“I suppose,” Vayne said, still looking sterner than usual. “Just promise me you will take care of yourself from now on.”

Now it was my turn to sigh. “I’ll try…”

Knowing that would be as far as he would get, Vayne led me in the direction he said he’d heard activity in earlier. Every other step I took pained me just a little more each time. We made it maybe halfway down the street before I remembered I had sort of promised to take care of myself.

_But what if he thinks I’m slowing us down?_

_YOU LITERALLY. HAVE HAD AN EMOTIONAL ATTACK. **THREE TIMES.** IN FRONT OF HIM. CALM THE FUCK DOWN._

It took me another minute to gather my courage since I was technically hiding something from him that I knew he wouldn’t like.

_Okay. All you have to do is speak. That’s not hard!_

_Yes, it is._

_If you keep bleeding, you will PASS OUT and that will be even WORSE._

_Okay, okay! I’ll say something!_

“Um…? Hmm…”

He turned his head slightly toward me. And at that moment my heart decided it wanted to take on ballet _yet again_ in his presence. I ended up misstepping on a small rock. The foot that slipped was on the same side as my hidden wound. Needless to say, I flinched _hard_ at the sharp pain that pierced my side as I righted myself. The yelp that escaped me had my friend on high alert.

“What? What is it?” he asked. I clutched at where the cut was, hissing at the discomfort.

“I was- _trying_ to say,” I said, voice straining, “that it’s not just my hand that’s hurt…”

“Let me see.”

I reluctantly let off the wound and opened my jacket for us both to inspect what was there.”

The gash was on the same side as the scars I got from Costlemark. It actually wasn’t that bad. I mean, it wasn’t _good,_ but it wasn’t too deep either. It hurt like hell, though. I tried not to cry at the thought of being so injured (I was not used to cuts and gashes, just bruises). Unfortunately there wasn’t really anything either of us could do.

“I’m afraid healing magic is not my strong suit,” Vayne said. “Do you have anything on you that could serve as a bandage?”

I thought for a moment. Trying to tear a strip off my shirt was always an option. But that would take strength I did not have. Maybe one of my unused shirts? No, too big… What else did I have? What little belongings did I have on Eos.

“Oh!” I perked up with an epiphany. “I have this!”

The red scarf I’d gotten on my first night on Eos shimmered into my hand, fresh from my share of Noct’s inventory. Unfortunately, I had never thought to store a supply of potions there.

“Good.” Vayne nodded. “That will work.”

Tying the scarf around me by myself didn’t work very well. I ended up making the knot on the wrong side and had to start over again. Even so, it was loose.

“Here, let me.”

Heat flushed up my cheeks. “What…? No, it’s okay! I’ve got it!”

Deciding to ignore my protests, Vayne crossed to my other side and the scarf was soon wrapped around me again. He made sure the makeshift bandage would be tight enough as I kept my shirt as low as I could without getting in the way. My whole face must’ve been tomato red by that point. A couple times I managed to glance his way. Then I caught him eyeing the clawed scars below the new wound.

“There,” he said, straightening himself. “That should be good enough to find your brother with.”

“...Thank you,” I said meekly, hands in front of me, one clasping the other.

“Of course. Now, we shall continue.”

The next few moments were spent in a comfortable silence. My eyes spent their time teaming up with my ears to find any sign of Noctis. So far, nothing. Where could he be?

_Please don’t tell me he did something stupid._

_Google search: my brother is an idiot please help._

Occasionally I’d look up at Vayne. He was mostly trained on the space in front of us. Sometimes I caught him looking at me. He didn’t say anything, just smoothly turned his head and kept walking. If only I knew what to say.

“Those scars…” But he spoke for me. “On your abdomen. I assume they aren’t from an accident…?”

“From Costlemark,” I told him. “Got slashed by a daemon because the sword I had before Ithilcalad wasn’t exactly… built for me. Ended up tilting over sideways.”

He nodded understandingly. “I remember you speaking of it before. I had no idea how fatal a wound it could have been.”

“Yeah, I thought it was over for a good few moments, there. Then I fell asleep after Noct gave me a hi-elixir. You saw the scene when I woke up.”

A thoughtful hum left him.

“So strange a thing,” he mused quietly, “that two people could become so close after so short a time.”

“...You’re one to talk,” I half-laughed. He allowed a single chuckle to leave him.

“I suppose there is some truth to that statement.”

He moved his head to directly look at me.

“You’re rather different from most of the people I’ve known.”

“Well, I’m not like other girls.”

“Oh?”

I whipped out the finger guns. “I’m a whole lot worse!”

He tried not to laugh, he really did. But when I started giggling, he couldn’t help but join me.

“I cannot say I agree with that notion,” he said. “And you shouldn’t speak of yourself in such a way.”

Though his words sounded like a scolding, his tone and eyes held a sort of softness in them, cradled it gently, subtly. A dimmed sort of softness, like he would let himself show only so much. Still, I was grateful I got to see any at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Every time Vayne shows up there’s a conversation somehow pertaining to mental health. I swear I’m not doing that on purpose! I guess my subconscious is trying to tell me something, ha ha.
> 
> Remember: it is perfectly okay to think of your favorite character helping you and comforting you, even in everyday life! You are not alone!! Lots of people do it! Myself included~ So don’t think of yourself any less because of your coping mechanisms as long as they aren’t unhealthy! Please take care of yourselves <3  
> Have a good day, guys!


	57. Affectionēs pro medicā ā tutoribus contexuntur

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reunion and separation...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “The affections for the healer are entwined by the guardians.”
> 
> I sure had fun writing this one! This chapter contains a surprising amount of foreshadowing >:D

“Hey, you didn’t hear any singing earlier, did you?”

“Singing? No, I don’t believe I did. Why do you ask?”

A small amount of embarrassment crept into my cheeks.

“Oh, n-no- no reason,” I said, waving it off. “I just, ah, um… Nevermind…”

“If you were singing,” Vayne deduced, “it is no wonder you attracted so many monsters.”

“Hey, Earth tunes are pretty sweet, dude. We got a _plethora_ of genres.”

“I do not doubt it.”

We had already walked the length of an entire street with no sign of Noctis anywhere. Whenever we encountered monsters, Vayne took care of them himself. I was strictly set to Watch Mode. Not my choice, by the way.

“He couldn't have gotten that far,” I muttered, gazing around at the crumbling buildings. Ignoring the flinching pain in my side was getting annoying. “We weren’t gone for that long- oh _shit,_ what if Seymour got him?!”

“Seymour?” Vayne looked at me. He narrowed his eyes. “Has he been terrorizing you like that Caius fellow?”

“Um, not me specifically, but Yuna and her friends. She’s missing memories, too. Which, by the way, reminds me that I need to tell you and Noct something later when we find him.”

“You are not missing _more_ memories, are you?”

“Nope. They are all present and accounted for.”

He nodded in approval. We turned a corner, slipping through a wall of fallen brick. My head swiveled left and right, searching for any sign of my brother.

“Noooctiiiis!”

No answer. I tried again.

“...Now I’m really starting to worry. What if something got him? What if he’s hurt? What if he’s been mortally wounded?” My hands clasped the sides of my head. “Oh, God, _why the hell did I leave him alone?”_

_What if he’s scared? He’s all alone, by himself, with no one nearby to help and I just **left him** like that! What the hell is WRONG with me?!_

Anxiety welled up in my throat, affecting my lungs which began to pick up their pace.

“Darling, you need to calm down,” Vayne said. He placed one hand on my back and began leading me down the next street. “We will find him, I promise you.”

“Ignis is going to _kill me.”_ My chest felt tight. “And _Gladio_ isn’t here which means- _Fuck,_ Noctis doesn’t have his Shield!”

Vayne stopped and pulled me a tad closer as panic set in. “Shh…”

“And- and his Sword just fucking abandoned him and his Best Friend isn’t here-! God, what if he _hates me?”_

With a sigh, I was pulled into a tight embrace by strong arms. The effect was instant: any form of a rising panic attack quelled and was replaced by comfort. I let out a long breath. Most of the tension left my small form.

“It would appear squeezing you is the best way to calm you,” Vayne quietly observed.

“It feels nice…” I said, voice muffled. “Reminds me of the Temple Grandin movie with the contraption she made to calm herself. She was autistic, too.”

“Did this machine squeeze her?”

“Mmhmm… Like the cows in the ranch when they got upset. That’s where she got it from. Weighted blankets are nice, too. One of my friends had one.”

He let me take as much time as I needed. I relished in the feeling of being in his arms as I calmed myself down. Several deep breaths went in… ...And out. In… And out. In…

“How are you feeling?” Vayne asked. I felt his grip loosen.

_No… I like being here! It’s warm and safe!_

“Better,” I mumbled. I was extracted from his arms. “Thank you.”

_Emotional support consul strikes again._

At that exact moment, a _burst_ of black goop and mist was expelled from an alleyway across the street. I stared, confused, as I recognized the telltale signs of a daemon infestation. The inhuman sounds of roaring and groaning melded with the faint clashing of a sword. There was only one person I could I could imagine daemons seeking out.

With a shaky breath, I gasped, “Noctis!”

Ignoring the wounds I had, I sprinted in their direction. Vayne followed close behind. When I reached the miasma, I halted to assess the situation.

Tentacled beasts with wings had Noctis surrounded, four of them, to be precise. He fought with all his power, but these particular monsters excelled in sapping all the energy out of their victims. Noct was reduced to frantically swinging as best he could and point-blank warp-striking each one. The disgusting, misty goop from their bodies had wafted out into the street as the fight continued on.

“What… _are_ those?” Vayne asked in a whisper.

“Daemons…” I answered. _“Mindflayers…”_

Noctis lashed out with a sword. One of the daemons caught his leg, causing him to trip. They promptly swept him up and he warped away as quick as he could before swiftly retaliating.

“We have to help him!”

“Wait, _______-!”

Ithilcalad shimmered into being. I held it reverently with two hands and tried to recall a charge Gladio had taught me. My hands lifted the sword to point towards the daemons. Before Vayne could stop me, I was running down the alley at top speed, trying not to slip on the miasma the damn things were excreting.

A tentacle shot out to grab Noct. My feet carried me there just in time. I slashed left and then swung right as Noct regained his footing. The blade of my sword cut through it cleanly. The bite on my hand burned painfully but I ignored it.

_“_______?!”_ Noctis gasped. “Where the hell did _you_ come from?”

“You’ve been gone for too long, dumbass,” I grunted as I froze my sword over and swung out again. “I was _worried.”_

“And you brought a friend. Great.”

Vayne joined us, keeping his distance to send Sephira out as he studied the mindflayers curiously. Now that he had help on his side, Noctis was performing much better. We took down one flayer together as Vayne finished off another. The daemons screeched in outrage and began to target me, the weak link. I stuck my hand out in fear and covered one in ice as Noct warped in from the side. All three of us teamed up on the fourth. It perished in seconds.

Something sticky had gotten on my hand. I smirked.

“Hey, Noct,” I said, trying to conceal a laugh.

“Don’t ask it-”

I stuck my hand out to him. “Want some ectoplasm?”

“Eugh, yuck, no. Get it away.”

“Vayne?” I spun around to my friend who was inspecting the black misty residue on his armor. He glanced up. “Ectoplasm?”

A grossed look flickered through him before his features reached a deapan “if you dare put that near me, something bad will happen” expression. I wiped my hand off on my pants. Then I rounded on Noctis.

“What the _hell_ were you thinking?!” I marched right toward him. He scrambled back.

“What’re you getting mad at _me_ for?” he protested.

“You weren’t supposed to be gone this long, you idiot. It’s been _hours!_ Do have any idea how worried I was? Vayne had to calm me down from a _panic attack.”_

“I- uh, has it… been that long already?”

I growled. “I oughtta slap you for making me worry and almost getting…! Yourself… killed…”

I could _feel_ Vayne’s accusing gaze burning through my back. My head shook it off before I began my tirade again.

“And Gladio’s not here, Noctis! I, as your Sword, can only do so much. You _need_ your Shield. We’re a package deal! _Please_ don’t get yourself killed!”

I was done and out of breath. Noctis recovered from my surprisingly Ignis-level scolding. We both relaxed.

“You… know I was kidding when I said that, right?” he said. I blinked at him.

“Said what?”

“About… the sword and the shield? I was joking.”

“Yeah, well, Gladio and I take it very seriously.”

“...Uh, okay.”

Silence. We stared at each other awkwardly for a moment. Pain was swimming achingly in the wounds I had accumulated but I hardly registered it. I was just happy to have Noctis back.

Then Vayne cleared his throat. “Noctis?”

“Uh, yeah?”

“In your absence, your sister has gotten herself into trouble once more and requires _assistance.”_

The last word ended with Vayne standing right next to me and eyeing me accusingly once more.

“Oh!” I started. “Right. Elixir, please.”

“Is it _that_ bad?” Noctis asked, summoning the aforementioned elixir. I loosened the scarf around my middle and banished it to inventory. “The _hell happened_ while I was gone?”

“I ask myself the same whenever I return,” Vayne sighed.

“Singing attracted monsters and the monsters didn’t like me,” I answered simply. I crushed the elixir and happily let the feeling of healing take over.

“Wait,” Noct said. “You came out looking for me _alone?”_

“Well, yeah, what’d you expect me to do? And how’d you know?”

“I’m pretty sure you’d only sing if you were alone, so…”

“I encountered her as she fled from said monsters,” Vayne said, shifting to rest his arms behind his back. “I have already spoken to her on the account of _safety.”_

“Man, I owe you big time.”

I crossed my arms and pouted. “I’m not _that_ much of a handful… Am I?”

_“Yes,”_ they both answered. I shrunk back.

“Okay, sorry, I’ll try to be good.”

My gaze shifted to Noctis.

“Are you okay? I know you were… kinda depressed back there.”

He shrugged. “I guess, yeah. Didn’t mean to be gone for so long, though. ...Sorry about that.”

“I believe you had something to tell us…?” Vayne prompted. My mind went blank for a moment. “Concerning the missing memories…?”

“Oh!” I straightened up. “Okay, basically…”

I did my best to shorten the explanation for what happened with Yuna and how me and those other guys determined that Materia and Spiritus could control our memories. Then I told them about the final piece to the puzzle that was my mind.

“So… Spiritus lied?” Noctis said, not surprised. “Makes sense if they both wanted you.”

I shrugged. “I don’t mind too much. As long as I know what I’m supposed to be doing, I’m good.”

“It would make sense,” Vayne reasoned, “that he would take advantage of the state Materia left you in. If it was your own choice to temporarily forget, he would use your new mindset to manipulate the playing field.”

He looked at me directly.

“As the Queen moves where she pleases on a chessboard, so will you, and the gods here know it well. While there are others here not from the same world as their friends, you are different from them. These worlds, _our_ worlds are connected by the same force, otherwise they would not be able to come here. Your own does not fall in the same plane. It is curious that the gods allow you to remain when they cannot control you.”

“Is that why my memories of _you_ got erased by accident?” I asked. “Because the magic didn’t work as it should have?”

“I would not rule it out.”

“It’s _weird_ to think of a world without magic,” Noctis said, shifting his weight. “And how that fact has basically fucked you over big time.”

“Ehh… I like having magic, though,” I said, shuffling my fingers together. “It’s fun. Besides the coughing…”

We stayed in the quiet for a few moments. It was nice, I thought. My two favorite people in the universe were with me, standing in a comfortable silence. A cool breeze lazily brushed by us and through the city. I relaxed and asked what we should do now.

“I feel the faint connection of a call,” Vayne said. “We should reunite you with the rest of Materia’s warriors.”

“Perfect timing,” Noct said. A Torsion opened, and we walked on through.

 

“Yuna!” I called, darting out of the Torsion. “Guys, we’re back!”

“________!” “Hey, it’s Noctis!” “You found him!”

Yuna and her friends greeted us happily, glad we were safe. Mog welcomed us back, glad Vayne had found us before they had even called. They were standing before a giant, purple fortress. It stretched up to the sky, looming ominously in the night. The dark clouds we had seen earlier came from here. They looked heavy and ready to burst.

“Please don’t run off again,” Silver Boy said. “We were worried.”

My body slanted to the side. “Don’t worry - I’ve already received a scolding for that.”

“I certainly understand,” Yuna told me warmly. “We have all our memories back. It would seem we both went on a journey to find someone close to us, though yours was much shorter.”

I half-laughed. “Yeah, but it didn’t feel shorter. And that’s great, about your memories! You feeling better?”

“Much better. Thank you for your words earlier.”

“No problem.”

“So, uh, what _is_ this place?” Noctis asked, looking up at the fortress.

“The Emperor’s Pandaemonium,” Firion answered. He didn’t sound too happy. A bit angry, actually. “And that’s where we’re headed.”

“And it is here that I leave you be,” Vayne told me. As everyone prepared to enter the castle, he pulled me aside. “Be very, _very_ cautious inside. I have reason to believe the Emperor is after your power.”

I cocked my head. “Why? I thought he didn’t like me?”

“Whether or not he truly likes you does not matter. What he wants, he will pursue. I fear for your safety.”

“Then why don’t you _stay?”_

He was quiet. I stared at him helplessly. What was it he wasn’t telling me? Didn’t he trust me? Did he think I’d tell the others? I’m good at keeping secrets!

“There would be far too much conflict should I come with you,” he finally said. “Not only between myself and the Emperor, but between myself and the other Ivaliceans, and they and you. I would rather not tear your merry band apart, not through you. That would be terribly cruel to you.”

I looked down, disappointed.

“Okay,” I said sadly. “I’ll be careful.”

“No running off without your brother.”

“Right.”

“And take care of _yourself,_ please.”

Sigh. “I _will.”_

“And let the other healers do their jobs. It would not do for you to hurt yourself unnecessarily.”

“Gah! Okay, okay! I’ll be good, I promise!”

“Good. Then I shall check in once this is all over.”

“Okay… Be good, yourself, okay?”

He laughed lightly. “If it pleases you.”

“It _does.”_

I waved goodbye and joined my brother as everyone entered the fortress.

“Y’know,” I said to Noct, “I know this place belongs to a villain but you gotta admit… It looks damn fine.”

The inside had tiled flooring. The walls looked the same, and so did the ceiling. The floor was a deep blue, the walls, a royal purple. Sky blue crystals jutted out in clusters in the corners of the rooms. Patterned glass windows streamed in light from outside, making each room feel like a cathedral.

“I guess, yeah,” Noct said. “It’s pretty alright. Pretty _disturbing.”_

He had a point. Despite the gorgeous interior, the palace had an intimidating air about it. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but whenever we entered another hall it I could tell we were getting closer and closer to something dangerous. This castle had a great purpose. Terrible, yes, but _great._

“Don’t go too far. I don’t wanna lose you again.”

We stuck together as we traversed each corridor. I was aware of the conflicted sentiments Firion and his friend, Maria, had. Still, I decided to stay out of that. Getting caught up in more complicated emotions would not do well for my psyche. Besides, Yuna was tagging along with them. She’d be good help.

“So how are you doing?” I asked. “Did you get enough quiet time?”

“Yeah…” Noct answered. “Uh, just… solemn, I guess.”

_And that means “I don’t really wanna talk about it._ “Gotcha.”

Besides the general regal design, there wasn’t much decoration. I poke a few of the crystals. They pulsed and glowed and tried to sap my magic. I thought ‘how ‘bout no’ and backed away. The patterned windows didn’t vary. The walls remained the same. Hallways twisted and turned like a maze so we stuck close to the others when we had to. Even despite the little variation, I took a few pictures for Prompto anyway.

“Wait, you have your phone?” Noct asked, surprised. “Lucky you.”

“Where’s yours?” I asked back.

“Think I left it in the room car on the train.”

“Guess it’s up to me to keep track of everything.”

And by that, I meant: ‘I’ll take more pictures for Prompto.’

We were maybe halfway through the place when we finally came to an area with more depth in decor. It flourished as a crystal flower garden. Gem-like roses and vines of thorns twisted overhead through trellises. I followed the long lines of crystalline carnations until I reached the back of the room. A brilliant stained glass window bathed a small bunch of tuberoses that seemed to be cut from white quartz. My feet carried me slowly, my eyes fixated on the precious blossoms.

“Hey, Noct, look at these. They’re so pretty!” I reached out a hand. “I probably shouldn’t touch them… but I _really_ want to…”

Vayne’s words echoed in my mind…

_“Take care of yourself…”_

My hand paused right as I was about to touch the small petals. Doing so wouldn’t end well. I could _feel_ it. My hand dropped back to its place at my side.

_I **really** wanna touch it, though!_

“Is that…” Noct came up behind me, “a flower made out of crystals?”

“Looks like it,” I said. “It looks so smooth. What do you think it feels like?”

“I don’t know, probably… a _rock?”_

“Very funny.”

“This whole place screams ‘trap’ but… you’re right, it is pretty nice. Just don’t touch anything.”

“I won’t.”

As Noctis stepped away to examine other things in the room, I noticed that the crystal tuberoses were emitting their own light. It began to repeatedly glow, pulsing like forbidden magic. I wanted to lean forward to look closer, but my feet stepped back.

_Be careful…_

But the flowers grew brighter. For every step back that I took, the light spread more and more. It was blinding. I couldn’t see anything. I tried to scramble away. But when the light calmed down, I was close to the flowers once more. I tried again. The same happened. And again. ...And again.

“Noctis!” I called. He spun around, eyes wide.

“_______?!” he shouted. He began running my way. I tried to reach but…

Bright white light burst in my vision.

And then it faded…

And then a sharp pain took over my body. My anguished cries caught the attention of everyone nearby as purple orbs materialized around me. They made a cage and lifted me into the air.

_No, no, no, no! Please stop! STOP! I’ve had ENOUGH!_

“NOCTIS!”

The pain faded but the cage was climbing higher.

“What’s going on?” I heard Yuna’s worried voice.

“That looks like one of the Emperor’s spells…!” Firion realized loudly.

“Shit!” Noctis said, panicking. “Don’t worry! We’ll get you down! I promise!”

A real cage formed around me, the orbs dissipating.

“Just hold on! _______!”

And I disappeared.

 

“So, the little bird returns to me.”

“I don’t know who the _hell_ you think you are, but you are in _so_ much trouble!” I rattled the cage my both hands before I’d completely appeared in wherever the cage had brought me. “My brother’s gonna kick your ass and he’ll _smile_ while he does it!”

Creepy laughter filled my ears. I froze, my veins running cold.

_This is exactly what Vayne warned me about._

The cage had taken me to a throne room. It didn’t look much different from the rest of the palace in terms of architecture. The whole place was colored indigo. More, larger crystals had sprouted up around the throne, cloaking it in whatever magic they had. And there, in the throne itself, was the Emperor. My cage now hovered in the corner to his left, my right.

“How cute that she thinks she can defy me,” he said with an equally creepy smile. He stood, magic making him float right up to me. I inched back, curling up in the back corner of the cage. “Did I not tell you your magic is to be coveted?”

“It’s not for sale,” I managed to said solidly and deadpan.

“I did not purchase it, for it is priceless. It is to be _taken.”_

I flinched at his tone and brought my knees further up to shield myself.

“...What do you want…?” I said, knowing that trying to get out of here was going to be fruitless. “I’m not licensing my power out to people. I’m my own person.”

“You certainly seem fond of the _other man_ who dares call himself _‘emperor.’”_

The freezing fear inside me warmed slightly with anger at him targeting Vayne.

“The man who believes duty to be over the power he holds. Do you not lend your magic to him?”

“He’s my friend.”

“That makes no difference to me. Power is power, and the fact of the matter is: you hold god-given magic, far greater than you know how to use.”

“Yeah, people keep telling me that… Doesn’t mean I like it.”

He neared my cage. “And now _I_ rightly hold it, hold _you_ in my grasp to use as I please.”

I suppressed a scared whimper.

“I require your obedience, that beautifully _blind_ obedience you show your superiors. To think such a powerful being submissive… What luck have I!”

“...I’d rather not.” I whispered.

“And just what do you think you can do? Your either answer to me, or those maggots you call friends die a horrible death. That _brother_ of yours is no match for me.”

Anger boiled up in my chest. _“Don’t. Talk. About Noctis.”_

“And _you_ will be the one to finish them all. Do I make myself clear, little bird?”

I narrowed my eyes. “I’m _not_ a bird.”

“Were you not singing your little heart out in the city before you arrived here?”

My face paled. “Th-that’s not… That’s none of your business…”

“It _is_ when I am concerned. Your will is now forfeit. Either you do as I command, or the new world you’ve come to love will become _hell_ when my armies have reached through each dimension.”

_“...What?”_

“This world… is a _goldmine_ of opportunity. Here I shall make my domain, and _you,_ little songbird, will help me raze each world to the ground. I shall have dominion over all of them through you! Perhaps, if you’re good, I will give you Eos as a reward for you work.”

Now I _surged_ forward at the Emperor, hitting the cage bars with my hands.

_“You wouldn’t **dare!”**_ I shouted. He didn’t even flinch. “You _fucking bastard!_ There is no way I would _ever_ let you touch _Noctis’ home!”_

Now it was his turn to shake the cage, pushing it back so I fell forward. He grabbed my arm via magic, pulling me to him painfully.

“I will _not,”_ the Emperor emphasized, “tolerate such _foul language_ in my presence.”

_“Fuck you,”_ I spat.

“Then you shall be silenced for your insolence!”

He let go of the cage and it swung violently back and forth. He observed me with a sadistic smile as my body crashed against the cage bars. When I regained my balance and senses, head still reeling, I tried swearing at him again.

Nothing came from my lips. Not a sound. I paused, shocked. I looked at my hands and then back up. I tried mouthing ‘what did you do?’ but no real words came out. My eyes narrowed angrily.

_Fine. I don’t need words to communicate anyway._

My arms whipped back and shoved forward. A raging blizzard of ice and snow burst forward from my hands. The Emperor was quick to summon a magical shield. But instead of anger, he showed signs of fascination.

“So you do not need your words to cast your magic,” he observed. “How _splendid…!”_

My eyes widened in fear as a scepter appeared in his hand. He brought it forward.

“I don’t even require your reluctant consent to use such magic. What a _perfect_ slave you will make, little songbird!”

_No. Please. I don’t want this! Noctis, please hurry!_

The scepter pulsed with magic. He gave it a short wave. My body jolted as the darkness within me sprang forth at his summons. Black mist swirled around me, coming from my skin, my _soul._ With another wave of the scepter, I collapsed, curling in on myself as the pain of the light and dark warring took over. White hot pain, causing my vision to wane, filled every inch of me. Tears pricked my eyes.

_“...Stop…”_ I tried to say. But no words came forth. The pain grew and grew. I was as curled up as I could be. Fate would not even allow me to scream as my consciousness faded.

 

_“Where the hell is Mog?!”_ Noctis demanded.

“Noctis, you need to calm down,” Cecil said. “We’ll find _______, don’t worry.”

“This is the millionth time this has happened! I’m gonna tear that fucker a new one when I find him…!”

“But why do you need Mog?” Yuna asked. “She’s most likely somewhere in this castle.”

“Because I’m not the only one who’s gonna be _pissed_ when he finds out what happened. That son of a bitch isn’t gonna survive both me _and_ Vayne…!”

“Are you sure summoning Vayne is a wise idea?” Warrior of Light asked. “The others from his world may not agree.”

“They agreed to work with him, didn’t they? And why the hell does it matter when someone just got _kidnapped?!”_

“Alright, we’ll find Mog,” Cecil said. “But you need to calm down. Getting angry isn’t going to help anyone right now.”

Noctis’ hands formed fists as he tried to force himself to cool off.

“Why don’t you go find Mog and take the time to calm your thoughts?” Yuna suggested with a reassuring smile. “We’ll find the throne room and Mog can lead you both to us.”

“...Fine,” Noct agreed. “As long as _something_ is being done…!”

 

“Hmph… So the worms have squirmed all the way into my castle,” the Emperor said, unamused. Firion, Maria, Celes, Yuna, and Paine faced him bravely.

“Who’s this guy?” Paine asked.

“The Emperor,” Yuna answered. “Even still, I just can’t respect him.”

“He’s the one responsible for destroying my home,” Firion said, trying to curb his growing rage.

“He’s a man who craves dominion over all,” Celes continued, “including other worlds. His greed knows no bounds.”

“What do you plan to do after you’ve invaded the other worlds?” Maria interrogated. “Will you try and control them with monsters and servants as you did with us?”

“And where is _______?” Yuna asked firmly.

“And if I do?” the Emperor questioned, not even concerned with their worries. “I have no need for those who refuse to submit to my rule. The lives of the insubordinate have no value to me. They are worthless and deserve to be crushed like the worms they are. As for the little songbird, she has, shall we say, submitted.”

“Do you know just how many lives will be lost to that logic of yours?!” Firion defied. “_______ is not a _tool_ to be _used!”_

“What use have I for such sentiment?”

“...What’s wrong with sentiment?” said a voice from the back of the room. A purple haired man began his march to the front. _“You_ have nothing to protect. No one will willingly obey the commands of someone whose only power is to take lived. Sentiment has the power to _save_ lives-!” The man reached the front, two more men at his side. “Though it’s not something I’d expect _you_ to understand!”

“Leon!” Maria gasped.

“He’s nothing more than a monster. I doubt we’ll ever reach an agreement with him.

“And monsters deserve to be _put down,”_ Noctis joined in. “Hand over ______ and I’ll _consider_ going easy on you.”

“I do not believe he deserves mercy,” Vayne countered, extending his arm to challenge the Emperor. “The right of the powerful is serve the ones they lead!”

“I have nothing to say to traitors,” the Emperor said to Leon, “and you are no different.”

“You may be right,” Leon said. “Perhaps I am a traitor… But as such, I will fight you with all I have!”

As everyone rallied behind Leon, determined to fight against the incarnation of greed, the Emperor stood.

“It is time to rid my castle of you pests,” he announced. “In the end, that man proved to be very useful. But before I crush you myself, see whether you can defeat my newest slave. She has a _passion_ about her you may find _difficult_ to counter.”

In a short flare of dark particles, a figure appeared before the throne. Her form held itself in a zombified manner, head drooping, arms limp. The dark mist reminded Noctis of daemons. His rage reached a peak and he nearly _cried_ at how helpless and forlorn she looked.

_“_______!”_ He tried to rocket forward, but Leon caught him. “Get the hell out of my way! That’s _my sister!”_

“That is not your sister anymore,” Leon said. “We must do what we must to stop him.”

“No way in hell am I _fighting_ her!”

“What do we do…?” Yuna whispered, horrified. “He’s controlling her body!”

“Noctis,” Vayne said, surprisingly calm. Though if ______ were fully aware of her surroundings, she would hear the suppressed fury within his words. “Allow me to remedy the issue.”

The Sephira shimmered into existence, gliding around him elegantly.

“What’re you…?” Noctis questioned. “No way in hell am I gonna have to fight _you,_ either!”

“I have no intention to harm her,” Vayne said, raising his hand in the air. “It is merely a matter of neutralizing her powers.”

The glorious array of swords brightened as a small, cerulean stone appeared in Vayne’s hand.

“What… _is_ that?” Maria asked.

“Manufactured nethicite,” Vayne answered simply. “It has the power to absorb magic. Whatever she aims at us will be negated. It will not hurt her. You have my word.”

“Dammit, how many times are you gonna do something I owe you for?” Noctis asked exasperatedly.

“We can discuss terms later. I believe she requires our assistance in regaining her awareness.”

_“You,”_ the Emperor seethed. “If you want her power, then I suggest you prove you deserve it justly.”

“It is not her _power_ I desire. It has surprised even I, how someone’s affections can be so rewarding.”

“Then consider it an honor to be crushed by my hand!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe another XV character will come in next...?


	58. Just What Happened To Me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader is exhausted but is determined to learn just what the hell happened while she was out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUESS WHAT  
> You: ...what?  
> THIS IS A DOUBLE UPDATE!!!  
> And by that, I mean that you’re getting TWO chapters instead of one!! I’ll upload the next one later tonight or tomorrow.
> 
> But before you get to readin’, I just want to say thank you. This story has reached over _two hundred thousand words._ And I couldn’t have kept going if not for you!! Yes, you! :D My motivation level is a freakin’ roulette wheel and this story hit the jackpot!! (please knock on all the wood you can so I don’t jinx myself)  
> So thank you so very much for reading and supporting Reader and her crazy antics 💖 None of this has been possible without you! <3

The mind is suspended in a deep, black void. No light, no sound, no touch. In a trance, the body moves on its own, flexing the fingers, feeling them work. The head rotates, stretching the shoulders. The legs twitch and jolt. One hand raises up, fingers curling, flurries of snowflakes ready to be commanded. The mind has no control.

There is an explosion of distant sound, warped as if underwater. The mind continues its rest, not heeding the commotion. There is no conflict in the void. All is well here. Nothing can hurt here.

The arms start a dance. The feeling of weighted metal dips the right as the left comes to support it. The feet perform a running motion. The arms swing in tandem, a short spurt of flame erupting from the hands. It ceases it, absorbed by the void, feeds into nothingness.

 

Vayne knew rage, knew it well. Following the deaths of his brothers, at his own hands - nay, the _demand_ of his father to slay them had sent him off the deep end, had stripped him of every remaining _speck_ of innocence he had left. Rage at the Senate, rage at the gods, the damned _Occuria,_ rage for the state of the world and looming threat of war. He raged against everything that dare try to control his family and tarnish its history. Burning through his veins, his soul, his very essence, he knew it well. Rage was familiar. Rage had been kinder to him than anything else had been in years. Rage was _comforting_ even, even after his failure to stop the rebellion in Rabanastre.

Time flows differently there. Knowledge had been given to him that he should not have had. He learned of his eventual fate, his downfall, his last moments. Why…? Why would it end up that way? He had good intentions. He merely wished to bring peace to Ivalice, to the people of Archadia. And what did they care? They didn’t appreciate his efforts. Even his own _brother_ had joined in to strike him down. _Him, Vayne Carudas Solidor,_ the sword of House Solidor, he would have been a hero, righteous and just. History would praise his name, praise his House’s! Both would be remembered as the greatest dynasty Ivalice had ever known! And yet he had somehow done wrong. He had made a mistake. Something hadn’t gone as planned and it came back to condemn him for the crimes he committed, all in the name of his House, his nation, his brother. And that mistake would kill him.

And then… He was awake, brought to a new world by a god he didn’t care for, who made him fight for the sake of fighting. What a miserable existence that would have been. He raged internally at his new circumstances, unable to think of what his next step should be. So he had complied, knowing he would not be permitted to return to Ivalice unless he did so. His heart had ached, cried out at him to demand he be brought back. It _screamed_ at him to find a way home. To search for what he had done incorrectly, that he may correct his mistakes and turn to the right path.

And he had been denied.

And then he had met _her._ She reminded him so much of Larsa, so much of _himself._ A perfect blend of everything he held dear and her own personality. He had been drawn to it, unable to comprehend why. He recalled his mother once telling him that feelings could not always be explained, that sometimes they were just there and figuring out what they meant would be up to him. He remembered thinking how ridiculous that sounded. How could someone not have control over their own emotions? He always had and always will have. But she had been right. His heart had masqueraded these emotions as wanting her power, even knowing full well he may never get a chance to use them. This strange woman set before him had made him want things he’d never wanted before: to know true happiness, to complete his portion of his family tree, to have a happy family dedicated to making the world a better place, to bed the same woman more than once or twice, to keep her close and warm and _safe_ from the horrors of the world. How fleeting their interactions had been. She wouldn’t even grant him the privilege of bringing her home. Not that he blamed her.

Then he returned to Ivalice. His fate had come true. What the gods had told him came into being and he perished at the hands of his own brother, an irony he wished had never come to fruition. His soul had raged again, fueling his power, turning him into something he was not. That had been his mistake. His lust for power to protect his people had been his downfall. He should have known to be careful with the nethicite lest it drive him mad as it did all the others. He had not heeded the warning signs. And so he failed in that respect and it brought him to his knees. To his death. His raged once more, his soul unhappy with the circumstances. Why couldn’t fate show him mercy? He did not deserve it, yet he had still done good, had he not? Had he not rid the Empire of the corrupt Senate? Had he not secured the leadership of the nation to the House that cared the most? Had he not finally freed the world from the clutches of meddlesome gods who wanted naught from humanity but entertainment and a playing board that was easy to manipulate? Vayne had not found peace in life. He would not find peace in death. He accepted his mistakes and though he vowed to do better, he disappeared into the Mist.

And then he awoke again. The same world as before, not Ivalice, but different. Full of life yet empty all at once. He found _her_ again. His heart ached when she did not remember. Like a _dagger_ to his chest, it had felt. He had hid his emotions, promised to protect her, this strange woman from worlds away who had captured his heart unsuspectingly. He would channel his rage into something tangible, something worthwhile now that he could not return home. Her protection was of utmost importance, right after Ivalice’s.

She was peace incarnate. Her very essence calmed him, relaxed him. Her presence quelled his violent thoughts, the vengeful storm in his heart died down. Every minute with her called him to question himself, his actions. Had he truly been moral in his efforts for peace? He believed he had but then she had come and questioned him herself. Would it have been worth it? Millions dying in the pursuit of peace? Was that what peace truly was? He did not know anymore. What he did know was that peace and innocence should be protected. She exhibited both. Her shattered heart had not changed her. She refused to submit to the world’s whims. Her own had been destroyed yet she found the will to keep going, the drive to help those who had saved her. To heal them of their wounds, physical and emotional. She would not stop, even at the cost of her own pain. Her determination set his own soul aflame. Very well, then. She had his attention, his heart. He would not fail this time.

Every punch into the Emperor’s body made his chest sing with satisfaction. The tyrant did not deserve life, did not deserve _her_ loyalties and affections. This man, this _monster_ who only cared for himself would not be allowed to continue. He and Noctis would make sure he was brought to justice.

The Sephira glinted in the castle’s light. They cut the Emperor down as Noctis’ armiger joined in, striking him blow by blow with crystalline weapons as sharp as Leviathan’s razor teeth. Neither of them held back as soon as _______ had been taken away from the battlefield by Yuna so she could rest.

By the end, the Emperor was a bloody mess who never stood a chance. Leon, Noctis, and Vayne had done the most work, Firion and Maria following them closely. Everyone else had chipped in but did not get in their way. The feel of the monster’s soft, easily tearable skin against Vayne’s gloves sent waves of insane pleasure down his spine as he exacted revenge for what the man had done to what little happiness he had left. Both he and Noctis landed the final blow, two long slashes of swords making an X into the Emperor’s chest. He fell. He fell, and for now, all was well. All was well… except for _______.

 

I am weightless in my head. I am trapped in my own mind. It’s a nice break from the horrors of the universe. A short respite in the steady shattering of my heart. I do not want to leave this feeling. Cool, comforting darkness. There are no worries here, no thoughts of judgment, no anxieties, no fears. For the first time in a lifetime, I am really, truly… calm…

Another loud noise breaks the silence. My thoughts ignore it. My consciousness does not. Like the morning sun rising, dawn reaching its golden peak, my mind took notice of my body moving by itself. Something had taken my consciousness and stuffed something else in my head. Cotton, maybe. Marshmallows.

The sapping of energy gently woke me. Bit by bit, the magic my hands expelled lost its touch. As the power ebbed away, the light came pouring in. I couldn’t remember what had happened.

_Where am I? What’s going on?_

My eyes slowly blinked open. All I could see was a royal purple, blurred and fuzzy.

_Where did my glasses go?_

The sounds of chaos whirled in my ears. Clashing of swords, magic, and the gunshots set my whole being on high alert. I jolted at the cacophonous noise. A hand laid itself on my shoulder, gently pushing me back down.

“You should rest,” a soft voice said. “The Emperor’s magic was harder to lift than we thought.”

“What…” I coughed weakly. “What happened…?”

“Vayne used something called nethicite to weaken your power so we wouldn’t have to hurt you. He, Noctis, and everyone else are teaching the Emperor his lesson. You have nothing to worry about. They’ll be done soon.”

_Yuna… Thank you…_

I slipped back into a dreamless sleep.

 

Noctis’ life had been a sheltered one. He had attended public schools, yes, but social interaction was never his forte. His father was too protective of him for him to develop lasting social skills. Still, Noctis didn’t mind as long as he had his friends. But sometimes… Sometimes he still felt lonely. Prompto was his best friend, but sometimes he couldn’t always understand Noct. Ignis was lovely and had always been by his side. Still, Ignis could not fix everything, could not always provide the solution. Gladio was a whirlwind of emotions for Noct. His tough love often left their relationship strained. And after leaving the Crown City, after bidding his father a final farewell, for the first time in his life, Noctis had wished for a sibling.

He wanted someone who shared his life. Who knew how he felt, could comfort him when no one else could. He wanted someone to tease without having to be afraid of overdoing it, to stick by him through thick and thin. And his friends did all of that and he loved them for it. He was eternally grateful for everything they had done for him. They were family. And yet… they were not. They were not the hole in his heart, the final piece he’d been missing his whole life. For the longest time, he had thought Luna would be the one to fill it.

And then he had met ________. She had fallen for him, literally, and he could not have been more confused. The tie they shared was not obvious, but there was a connection he couldn’t explain. As she joined his little family, he readily accepted her. It took her time, but she settled in, settled in to the teasing, the tough love, the banter, the friendship. Everything he shared with his friends, he wanted to share with her. She became one of them, the missing piece to his heart, the sibling he’d never known he wanted.

She was there for him, though they were not very close. She tried her best to give him the space he needed but still be nearby in case he wanted comfort. He did the same. They didn’t understand those mutual feelings, but every night when they’d stare at the stars, he felt at peace. It was a peace he’d never known, a peace of the times when you don’t have to worry about the future. A peace where all that matters is you and the people who stand with you. A peace where good times and bad are reflected upon in tandem in a nostalgic light.

Seeing her heart break broke his own. It tore him apart to see her health deteriorate. It flayed the walls of his mind to know there was nothing he could do to stop her pain, to keep her from the horrors of the universe, to tell fate to fuck off and leave her be. He could feel her emotions through their connection. He could feel her empty heart, her heavy soul. Their beings had been joined since the universe’s dawn and now he could feel her sadness, her suffering. He couldn’t bear it. She didn’t deserve to know such tragedy. Someone so sweet and caring did not deserve such heartbreak, such torment. She should never had any of this thrust upon her and yet the Astrals didn’t care. They didn’t care about her wellbeing, they didn’t care how she was unless it somehow pertained to whatever it was they had brought her there for. He wished they’d left her alone. He didn’t need her to bring back the light, he could do it himself. She didn’t need to be included in his own misfortune.

So sweet is pain when all we know is emptiness. So sweet is the sugar of love when the bitterness of life runs out. Her hope had been restored by a man of questionable background. Her hope had returned through the saving graces of a goddess she had not always favored. Her hope had _returned_ to her eyes and her face. Her life had been granted back to her as the light of hope poured in. Noctis had never been happier to see someone else happy. He had never known such relief. She now was doing well, motivated and back to her old self. Noctis would never be more thankful.

And then it was stripped away. Her good mood had been devoured by the one thing Noctis hated most: the tyranny of an empire that knew nothing more than taking and taking. Having her snatched away drove him wild, sent him into a rage. Had any of his other friends have been in her place, he would have been the same. _No one_ fucked with Noctis’ family. This ‘Emperor’ would not get away with this.

His armiger flashed into being, a brilliant array of sky blue light. He slashed and hacked away at any bit of the Emperor he could reach. Warping had never been more satisfactory. Every time his blade plunged into the tyrant’s flesh, he felt more and more justified. This man should not be allowed to live, not after the things he had done to others. Not after taking away his sister. Not after taking away her _hope._

Vayne had been a saving grace. Their feelings for ______ same and yet different. Together they sliced at the monster’s body, their coordination unbelievable. It was beautiful, in a way, the dance of combat, the graceful strokes of a sword backed by the fierce blows of steeled punches. Mercy was in Noctis’ nature, but at that moment, it had vanished.

He would not lose her again.

 

No one understood just what the Emperor had done to me. No one… but Vayne and Noctis. When my brain shimmered back into wakefulness, I could hear them trying to explain it to several people. Something about the darkness being taken and amplified, causing light to… expand, I think. I would’ve opened my eyes to see them, but…

Warm arms carried me tenderly, my head resting on a firm shoulder, nestled beneath someone’s chin. It was… so warm… Like a peaceful Christmas morning, spending time with loved ones, curled up on the couch with fuzzy blankets and soft pillows. I yawned and snuggled closer to whoever was now caring for me.

“...-s she awake?” Noctis’ voice asked quietly. “She’s not lookin’ too good… Pretty pale…”

The chest my head rested on rumbled as a deep voice answered him, “Whether she is or not, she will not be ready for excessively strenuous activity.”

“Vayne…” my own voice drifted out, a whisper they could barely hear. I situated my head a bit closer to him.

“Hmm…?”

I remained quiet, half asleep. Noctis snickered quietly.

“She’s dreaming about you,” he teased. Vayne’s disdain nearly resonated with my soul. “Oh c’mon, don’t look at me like that. Ignis gives me enough of that already…”

“Rightfully so…” Vayne muttered.

“Man, you even _sound_ like him…”

I had to fight back a smile. Despite his complaints, I could tell Noct missed our friends. I hoped they’d end up joining us sooner or later. But for now…

_So sleepy…_

“Any idea where we should let her sleep?” Noct asked.

“Nowhere close by,” Vayne said. “I do not trust this forsaken city to be of comfort to her.”

“Yeah, same. ...I’ve got an idea, but I’ll have to ask one of the captains first. Just wait here. I’ll be right back.”

 

I finally awoke, _really_ awoke, in the airship. I have no idea how they managed to get me there. Noctis had draped my favorite blue blanket over me, letting me use his leg as a pillow. The buzzing of whatever powered the ship was both annoying and comforting, shaking the floor like a cat’s purr but otherwise ringing in my ears. I couldn’t hear any conversation. Where was everyone?

My head stirred, fixing myself on Noctis to get comfortable. We were in a small room, the cockpit, I think. There were controls to our left as well as a chair for the pilot. I couldn’t tell whose turn it was to fly the ship. It was nice of them to let us have some quiet space away from noisy people. I pulled the blanket closer.

“...You awake…?” Noct asked quietly. I hummed in response. “How you feelin’? Does… Are you hurt?”

“Mm mm…”

“You sure? Vayne said the dark and light magic in your soul got _really_ unbalanced. Like, _could-have-killed-you_ unbalanced.”

“...I’m good. It hurt at first. Now I’m warm and safe. Want sleep.”

“Alright. You can sleep, then. We’re heading back to the World of Light. I’ll wake you up when we get there, okay?”

“‘Kay…”

I fell into a restful sleep for another thirty minutes. Or maybe it was an hour, I couldn’t tell. When I got back to Eos I was going to beg Ignis to let me sleep for an entire day. That sounded really nice…

Yawning, I slowly lifted my head. Nothing had changed except for the lighting: it was much brighter now.

_We must be back in the World of Light. Sorry about your crystal, dude._

I allowed myself to sit up, yawning again. Noctis was nodding off to my right. I curled up against his side and he stirred with noise that sounded like a startled cat.

“H- what?” he mumbled. “I’m awake…”

“Mmhm… Sure,” I muttered, tugging my blanket closer.

“Oh, you’re awake. I think we’re almost there. You still tired?”

“Yeah, but I don’t know if I can fall back asleep.”

“Right. Gotcha.”

“So… ...What happened?”

Noctis adjusted himself against the airship wall. “I was gonna ask _you_ that.”

I blinked sleepily. “The Emperor… kidnapped me and when I… when I wouldn’t comply - I mean, he threatened Eos so I got mad and cursed and he didn’t like that…”

My gaze darted away.

“So he used magic to make me be quiet and then… I tried sending ice at him but that just made him realize my magic can be used without incantations so… Um… The last thing I remember is… misty darkness and… a lot of pain.”

Noctis was quiet for a moment, quelling the rage within. He’d already bested that tyrant. There was no need to beat him to a pulp again just yet. But still… He wanted him dead, not just incapacitated. And the way he’d used her… Death would not suffice for taking control of her body and soul.

“Noct…?”

“You were really strong…” Noctis managed to get out. _“Terrifyingly_ strong. Like, ‘terrifying’ doesn’t even begin to cover it.”

“I’ll say,” said a voice from the captain’s chair. It was Balthier’s turn to drive. _“Explosive_ would be better.”

As I processed their words, Fran came in. She walked past us, glancing at me, and settled against the window on the opposite wall next to Not-Ignis.

“I see Vayne’s _little one_ has recovered,” she commented.

“Fran, tell us,” Balthier asked, “what did you think of that display of magic…?”

She observed my anxious frame. “Only a lethal amount of Mist could produce those sorts of magicks. Nethicite, even.”

“...What did I…?” My head jerked to see Noctis. “I didn’t hurt anyone, did I?!”

“Uh, well…” he scratched at his head. “I mean, no one’s _dead,_ but…”

“Noctis, _what did I do?!”_

“Hey, hey, take it easy. It’s not your fault.”

“But I-!”

Noct used the blanket to quiet me by fixing it so it was fully wrapped around me. “You weren’t in your right mind. You couldn’t even control yourself. So don’t think it’s your fault, got it? I won’t accept anything else. It’s not even an excuse.”

I stared at the floor. “...Is everyone okay…? No one… no one… _died?”_

“No, everyone’s alive. You were the worst off after what that _monster_ did to you. There’s no way you could’ve handled that much magic without extensive training.”

“...What exactly… _did_ I do?”

“Well…”

_Leon rushed forward to strike _______ down. Noctis ran forward to stop him. She couldn’t get hurt, he wouldn’t allow it. No one was going to hurt his friend, his **sister.**_

_Blue flames lit up around her sword, hotter than she’d ever achieved. Her movements were jerky and unskilled, like a puppet with stiff strings. She forced herself to counter Leon, managing to block his blows. Then she attacked him directly with a wide swing over her head. It was parried. Noctis warped in to help, making sure she wouldn’t be physically harmed. The others in the room had no idea what to do, fighting one of their own who had no idea what she was doing, but one by one they began to back them up. With a few varied hits, Ithilcalad fell from her hands. She paid it no mind. The Emperor laughed as his magic caused her to build up her own. Noctis and Vayne rushed to stop her._

_The whole room lit up with white-hot flames. They filled half the room, nearly crashing through the walls. Several of their allies flew backwards and hit the walls, taking heavy damage._

_“I thought that thing was supposed to absorb her magic!” Noct shouted, darting to contain her by forcing her arms behind her back._

_“Just-! A moment, if you please!” Vayne called back, now trying to fight her off without touching her. The nethicite appeared in his hand. “We’ll need to trigger her power.”_

_“Right. Hey! ______!”_

_Her head whipped to face Noct, hair flying into her face, making her look wild. The hollowness of her eyes tugged at his heartstrings. She twirled her hands around each other, snowflakes and frost whirling around before she attempted to freeze the whole room over. A flash of white and light blue summoned a large, ice crystal, no, a gigantic **icicle.** She created more and more, each long, thick, and sharp enough to impale several people at once. Her hands flicked to send them at Noctis as he poised to warp away._

_With a glint, the remaining flames and the ice flickered away, their energy seeping into the strange stone Vayne held._

_“Is that good?” Noctis asked loudly. _______ went to move again. “Shit!”_

_Wind that should not have been inside a castle nearly knocked him off his feet. Everyone struggled to keep on their toes. Noct glanced at _______. Her arms were raised at the ceiling. Gray clouds began to form, thunder faintly hitting their ears. Sparks of electricity flashed through them. The clouds gathered power. The wind grew stronger, it howled and began to blow in two different directions. A few people almost got sucked up into a forming tornado. The clouds showed no mercy. She gave them the command to strike._

_Nothing happened. The nethicite took this magic as well. The half formed tornado disappeared, causing those near it to drop to the floor. _______ was enraged. Her sword appeared in her hand, erupting into flames once more. She charged at Vayne, whose nethicite soaked up the magic in her sword. In a split second, Noctis saw a shred of light in her eyes._

_“Now!” he commanded. Vayne joined him in racing to ______, who was now steadily collapsing from exhaustion. Vayne was closer, and he caught her before she hit the ground. As the Emperor let out shouts of anger, Noctis knelt by his sister. Vayne cradled her gently, brushing her hair back to inspect her. “Is… Is she okay?!”_

_“...I believe so,” Vayne said quietly. “Though perhaps not for long. I dread seeing how such unbalanced magic could have affected her…”_

_As Firion and Maria challenged the Emperor, Yuna came rushing over._

_“How is she?” she asked. “Is she hurt?”_

_“Not too severely, physically,” Vayne answered. “But spiritually, I’ve no idea.”_

_Yuna nodded. “Let me take care of her. You two can go help with the Emperor. I’m sure you’d like vengeance.”_

_“She needs to be somewhere safe,” Noctis said. “Away from the fighting.”_

_“That alcove should suffice,” Vayne said, looking to the left of the hall. He stood, _______ still in his arms._

_“And then we can kick some tyrannical ass.”_

_“Yes. For her.”_

_“For _______.”_

My body felt numb. I’d summoned a whole _tornado?_ From lightning magic? And… I’d hurt people, burned them, sent them flying across the room, nearly froze them to death or impaled them on icicles…

“How could I…?” I croaked. “I- I didn’t… I didn’t mean to…! I didn’t know-!”

“Hey, it’s okay, you’re okay,” Noctis comforted. “What happened in there? That wasn’t you. That was what the Emperor put _in place_ of you. You can’t be at fault if you weren’t even consciously aware of what was going on.”

“But… But what if… What if they all hate me now? Or what if they’re _scared?_ I don’t want people to be scared of me!”

“No one’s scared of you,” Balthier said matter-of-factly. “You’re far too docile for that.”

“...Exactly,” Noctis said. “They know you well enough by now to know that you’d never do that willingly. It was the Emperor, not you. He messed with your soul.”

“What… _did_ he do…?” I asked smally. “All I could see was black…”

“Well, uh…” Noctis rubbed the back of his neck. “From what I got from Vayne, it’s like… He tried to separate the dark magic from your soul and used that to control your body. Since he was possessing the dark, the light took over _you,_ but since it feeds off your soul when there’s no balance…”

“That’s why it hurt so much… He used my magic like puppet strings.”

“Yeah, pretty much.”

I leaned back against the wall and brought my knees up. “This is getting to be too much…”

“...I know. I’m sorry, really. I wish I could take it away from you. You never deserved anything of the terrible things that happened to you.”

Feeling another wave of sadness coming over me and my eyes warning me of possible tears, I shifted to try and wrap my arms around Noctis. It was too easy and felt a little anticlimactic. He was smaller than I’d thought. I sighed with a small, unsatisfied groan, slightly miffed.

“What?” Noct asked. “What’re you even doing…?”

“Vayne’s better for cuddling…” I muttered. “You’re too scrawny.”

“Wha-? _Hey!_ I’m not scrawny! What’s that even supposed to mean?”

“It means you’re too small for cuddling.”

“Oh yeah? And what’s so different ‘bout Vayne?”

My cheeks flushed with heat. “U-um… Well, y’know, he’s, uh… Um…”

I tried to desperately search for the right word without conveying my vast amount of thirst for the man.

_Thicker? No, definitely not. Bigger? Nope. Dammit, what will make it sound not so sexual?!_

“He’s just more… fleshed out…?” I whispered, suddenly remembering there were other people in the room.

“Seriously?” Noctis asked, annoyed. “‘Fleshed out’? That’s all you can say?”

“Shh! And no, I can’t say anything else without it sounding weird.”

“You know you can just say he’s more muscular, right?”

“Don’t say it so loud! And I didn’t want to… make you feel bad…”

Noct’s eyes narrowed. “Feel bad about what? I mean, I’m not Gladio, but I’m sure as hell not weak either.”

“No, I know that! I just- this- I can’t-!”

“You should know, _______,” Balthier amusedly commented, “you should never insult a man’s masculinity.”

I huffed, rolling my eyes. “Well, it’s not _my_ fault a man’s ego is about as fragile as a thin piece of glass.”

“Okay, _ouch,”_ Noctis said as they both made protests. “That was uncalled for.”

“Point made.”

A small exhale left Fran.

“By the gods…” Balthier said, now bewildered. “I think you just managed to make Fran _laugh.”_

I let myself smile just a little bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vayne’s favorite method of coping is suppressed rage :) I could write a whole paper on my characterization of him, like damn. And Noctis - Noctis and I are too much alike, not completely but enough to the point that I understand him on an almost spiritual level.
> 
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> Someone please tell Larsa that his brother loves him and just wants what’s best for him, even if what he thinks is what’s best actually isn’t. Also someone needs to get Vayne some family counseling sessions. Please, for the love of God just d o i t . .. .


	59. You’re Here, Too?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A friend appears!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s Prompto!!!!

We finally arrived at our destination: a grassy field cliff surrounding a forest. It was bright and sunny. A perfect day for exploring and finding more allies. Why we still needed more, I didn’t know. Even so, Noctis and I stood looking out at the forest with a few other people. We were preparing to split up to explore and train a bit.

“_______!” I turned to see Yuna approaching. “Terra, Y’shtola, and some other girls are going to go for a walk, maybe train a bit with our magic. Would you like to come?”

I contemplated it for a few seconds before thinking:

_Fuck it. I don’t want them to think I don’t like them._

“Oh, okay,” I said a tad shyly. The wariness in my chest came from how they might feel about my explosive display of power in the Emperor’s throne room. “Sure.”

“You sure?” Noctis asked. “You’re not too tired?”

“A little, but I don’t think I’ll be able to fall asleep again for a while.”

“We’ll keep a good eye on her.” Yuna’s smile became even more gentle. “Besides, this might be good for her! Fresh air always helps.”

“Alright…” Noct said. “...I don’t really want you to leave my sight just yet, though…”

“I’ll be okay,” I assured him. “I won’t approach any suspicious flowers. Not after Undertale. I’ll be careful.”

“...Right. Take care of yourself, and don’t go too far. I wanna be able to hear you if something goes wrong.”

“Alright, I will. Er, won’t? Eh, you get it. I’ll be back in one piece, I promise!”

And that is how I found myself in the midst of an all girl outing with the few friends I had and some others. Namely, a nice princess named Garnet, an enthusiastic girl called Rinoa, and a girl named Eiko who despite being a small child was headstrong and not afraid to speak her mind.

“So, ______!” Rinoa addressed me cheerfully. “I heard your world doesn’t have magic. Is that true?”

“No magic?” Garnet questioned. “So there are no mages?”

“Um, yes, it’s true,” I said, somewhat awkwardly. “And no, we don’t. Only in fiction.”

“What about moogles?” Eiko asked. “You’ve gotta have moogles!”

“Um, nope…”

“What?!”

“I do believe humans are the only sapient species on Earth, yes?” Y’shtola said.

I nodded. “Yep. Just us and billions of species of animals.”

“It’s kinda like that in my world, too!” Rinoa said. “But we still have magic. If magic didn’t exist, I wonder if everything that happened would’ve gone differently, or if it would’ve even happened at all…”

I decided not to pry. “A lot can still be done without magic. For example: trying to take over the world, going to the moon, trying to go to the bottom of the ocean, which we never finished because of all the pressure underwater.”

“The moon?” Yuna asked. “How does one go to the moon?”

“Um, well, I’m not a rocket scientist so I don't know the specifics, but basically…”

I tried telling them most of what I knew about the history of space travel. Once more, it shocked them all to the core.

“I want to see the stars, too!” Eiko exclaimed.

“The view of Alexandria and the Iifa tree from so far away would be beautiful,” Garnet said.

“Hey, ______!” Rinoa got my attention. “Your magic is powerful. Think you can send a shard of ice that far up?”

I grinned. “Well, I can try.”

“Be careful not to stress yourself too much,” Yuna warned me gently. I nodded and readied my arm. The girls stepped back as my fingers curled, snowy flurries appearing around them. I curled them as much as I could. Now how to get that amount of power… Hmm…

I tapped into the black magic in my soul. An icicle shot into the air like a bullet. It traveled up and up and up… For a few seconds I lost sight of it.

“Woah…”

Then it almost hit me on the way back down.

“That was amazing!” Rinoa said. “Betcha I can do better!”

“Oh, can you?” Y’shtola teased. “You might as well put that Sorceress’ magic to good use.”

“I wonder how far I could go…?” Terra thought as she gazed up at the sky.

And thus, our competition began. Rinoa’s shard nearly reached the height my icicle got to. She cheered loudly as she almost outdid me. Garnet’s went high, but not too high. Maybe three fourths of mine. Y’shtola’s nearly matched Rinoa’s and Eiko’s was on par with Garnet. Terra’s went just a _little bit_ farther than mine. I laughed when it burst into snowflakes. Yuna started out watching but joined in at the end, making the middle point between Garnet’s and mine.

“And Terra is the winner!” Rinoa commentated happily. “And _______ and I are the runner-ups!”

My giggles came from Rinoa’s outspoken personality and the happy thought that no one was scared of me after my possessed episode in the throne room.

 

“So, Noct,” Zidane asked. “How’s your sister doing? I heard she got messed up pretty bad.”

“Yeah…” Noct answered awkwardly. “She’s alright now. I think. At least, it _seems_ like she is… But…”

“She strikes me as the type to mask her own feelings,” Auron commented, “so she doesn’t worry anybody.”

“Yeah, exactly. You know someone like that?”

“She and Yuna get along well for a reason.”

“Ah, gotcha.”

“Noooct!” a familiar voice called. It wasn’t _______. Noctis almost couldn’t believe it as the figure of a happy-go-lucky blond entered his vision at top speed.

“Prompto?! You’re here, too?!”

“A friend of yours, Noct?” Zidane asked.

“Yeah,” Noctis said with a ghost of a smile. “His name is Prompto.”

“Woah! You look great, Noct!” Prompto said. “And here I was shaking in my boots! I can’t believe you’re doing just fine.”

“Well, things have died down _just_ a little. I can tell you all about what just happened later. But if you have any questions about this place, just ask.”

“I seem to recall someone from home sulking about not having friends from home around,” Auron teased. “Now who was that?”

“I don’t know,” Noctis said coolly. “You must be imagining things, Auron.”

“So you’re close friends,” Vincent said. He was a friend of Cloud’s. “It seems to put him at ease, like _______.”

“I have that effect on people!” Prompto said proudly. “But I’m happy to see him, too. And ______ is here? Where is she?”

“She’s with some friends she made,” Noct answered. “Terra, Yuna, the cat girl…”

“Uh, ‘cat girl’...?”

“Y’shtola.”

“That… doesn’t help.”

“If you’re a friend of Noct and _______ 's,” Kain cut in, “you must be quite formidable in battle. Can we count on you in a fight?”

“Sure can,” Noctis answered for Prompto. “He’ll be fine.”

“H-hold on a sec, Noct!” Prompto said nervously. “I mean, I heard what’s going on in this world: we were summoned by some gods to fight. But isn’t it a little suspicious? Why are you helping them?”

“Because they’re counting on me,” Noctis said simply.

“...That’s just like you, isn’t it? And with ______ here, I can’t just run on home, can I?”

“You couldn’t run on home even if you wanted to, so why not lend a hand here?”

“If you’ve got any doubts,” Vincent said, “it’s best to sort those out first.”

“N-no, I’m fine!” Prompto decided. “If Noct is going to help, I will, too!”

“Are you sure?” Zidane asked.

“Yeah. I want to help Noct. And ______.”

“You’re a kind soul,” Kain said, “just like them.”

“But aren’t we all the same in wanting to help a friend?” Zidane pointed out.

“Exactly,” Noctis said. Prompto laughed and punched the air.

“Well, here’s to new friends in a new world!”

Noctis chuckled with him.

“But seriously, where is ______?”

“C’mon, I’ll take you to her.”

 

“_____________!”

I jolted at the sound of my name being called. After our magic height competition ended, my new friends and I decided to compare magic from world to world. Y’shtola got to examine my magic like she did before, and I told her all the stuff Vayne and Noct had told me. But now we were being interrupted.

I spun around to see a yellow blur running at full speed. At first I thought it was a chocobo, but then-

“Oof!”

Someone crashed into me.

“Oh thank the gods you’re okay!” Prompto cried, holding onto me like a worried mother to her child. “Noct told me what happened! I can’t believe an empire finally managed to capture you!”

“P-Prompto?!” I exclaimed. “What’re- You’re here, too?!”

“Ha ha, Noct said the exact same thing! You really are siblings!”

“U-um, Prom…? Can you… let me go…?”

“Oh! Right, sorry!”

“Are you a friend of ______ 's?” Terra asked curiously.

“Yep!” Prompto gave them his famous, golden retriever smile. “Name’s Prompto! You must be… Hmm…”

“I’m Terra. It’s nice to meet you!”

One by one I introduced my new friends. Prompto was almost overwhelmed by all the girls around him. He managed to keep his composure.

“So… Which one of you is Vayne…?” he questioned teasingly. My shoulders dropped.

“Seriously?” I muttered. “Is _everyone_ going to tease me about that?”

“You set yourself up for it,” Noct said, arms crossed.

“...Hmph…” I crossed my own arms.

“Aw, man!” Prompto complained. “I wanted to meet him! Maybe give him that talking-to since Gladio isn’t here.”

“No offense, Prom, but it’s kinda hard to imagine you being aggressive or super angry.”

“I know, I know. I try to stay positive since Noct can’t seem to do that sometimes.”

“H-hey,” Noct said, taken aback. “I… I can be positive!”

“Oh yeah? I bet your emo ass can’t say _one nice thing_ about this place!”

“I-I’m not… I’m _not_ emo.”

“Mmm you kinda are…” I let him down slowly. “And that’s not positive.”

“Alright. I’m _positive_ I’m not an emo.”

All three of us laughed.

“Oh, and speaking of Vayne… I meant to ask, Noct: where did Vayne go earlier? Wasn’t he with you?”

“You don’t remember?” Noctis asked. I tilted my head. “You woke up to say goodbye…”

“I… did?” I trailed off. I didn’t remember that happening. “What did I say?”

“Ah, well… Not much…”

“...What did I do.”

Noctis tried to suppress a snigger. “Well, you wouldn’t let go of him for a start.”

As my cheeks flushed a little, he laughed. Prompto joined him.

“And you kept calling him your ‘emotional support consul,’ and that there are laws in place so you can keep him with you in public places.”

Prompto’s laughter increased. I stayed quiet.

“...________?”

_“Go on,”_ I whispered, thoroughly embarrassed. Prompto calmed down enough to listen. _“Tell me what else I did. I can take it.”_

“And you, uh, kissed him-...”

_“WHAT?!”_

“...-on the cheek…”

Prompto was cackling now. I corrected myself, “Oh… But _still._ Why did you let me do that?!”

“Hey, you think _I_ know what’s goin’ on in your head when you’re half asleep? And besides, it was kinda cute.”

My face felt like I was sitting next to a furnace. Noctis laughed loudly.

“Man, you should’ve seen his face! I don’t think anyone’s ever seen him that surprised or clueless before!”

My dipped to let my hair curtain my face. “What did he say…?”

“Nothing, really. He just sort of patted your head and continued to try and extract himself from your arms around his neck.”

“Man, I can’t wait to meet this guy!” Prompto said, wiping tears from his eyes. “It’s so gonna be worth it when he turns out to be the stern, serious type.”

“...Okay, you can stop now,” I said, still quiet. “That’s good. I’m good.”

“Oh, and also-” Noctis started.

“Noct.”

“What?”

_“Stop.”_

“...I managed to get a few photos if you wanna see.”

I lunged towards his phone as it appeared in his hand. _“Noctis! Delete them! Please!”_

He jumped away. “No way! Not a chance! You’ve got enough fodder about me and Luna, and fair is fair.”

“I didn’t take _pictures!”_

“You did to! I saw both you _and_ Prompto try to sneakily take your phones out!”

“Noctis. _Delete them.”_

“Don’t you wanna see them?”

“I do!” Prompto jumped in. “Give ‘em here, Noct!”

_“No!”_ I shouted, half laughing at our shenanigans. “Don’t you _dare!”_

“Oh, yeah?” Noct backed up farther into the field and near a patch of trees. “You want them deleted? Come and get ‘em!”

I summoned my sword. _“Noctis… I’m warning you…”_

“Twenty bucks says you can’t get it!” Prompto tried provoking me. I growled and launched myself at Noctis. “Gladio’d be pissed you aren’t training, anyway!”

“Noctis,” I grunted as he blocked my hit with his own blade.

“Yeah?” he taunted.

“I’m going to _hurt you_ since you technically saved me earlier so I won’t _kill_ you-!”

I attacked again, diagonally swinging up from left to right. Noct jumped back and dodged before rushing me. I quickly pivoted to the side and he missed. Prompto cheered us on in the background.

“Why do you keep teasing me?” I demanded to know. Noctis chuckled as we exchanged blows and parries. Clink! Clang! _Shnk!_ Our swords bounced off one another’s.

“Uh, ‘cause it’s fun?” he said mockingly. “And your reactions are so funny.”

“Well, so are _yours_ when I talk about you and _Luna!”_

His cheeks tinged pink and he lunged, striking three times: up, down, middle. I barely countered them all and dashed away to where he couldn’t reach me. As he warped forward, I readied a burst of snow. It hit him right as he materialized in front of me.

“That was a dirty trick!” he growled.

“Never said we can’t use magic!” I said, satisfied with my work as he suddenly switched from a sword to a lance. “Woah! _Watch it!”_

“Never said we couldn’t change weapons, either!”

“You _jerk!”_

Dodging Noctis’ practiced dragoon moves was a workout in and of itself. My magic attacks hit him nearly every time as I’d let the energy out as soon as I saw him coming in to land. His warping ability threw me off, though. I’d have to wait until he was on the ground to knock him over.

_When in doubt, just tackle ‘im._

Cue me frantically running around our little training area as Noctis repeatedly took to the skies to slam back down to the earth. We had caught the attention of several spectators, including the little groups we had been in before the whole fight started. Prompto had one foot out in front of him, close to jumping in to either join us or to stop us.

Then, Noctis threw his spear, warping gracefully with it. I paused and slowed down to watch him. He aimed carefully. I backed up, eyes glued to him. He threw the lance. I dodged it scarcely and then whipped around. He was ready to warp again but my body took control of itself and _lunged_ at him. He nearly missed blocking me by a hair.

Fire was in both our eyes, not so much from anger, but from the thrill of a _finally somewhat even_ spar between us. His hands had stabilized me, gripping my arms tightly. I knew he wouldn’t let go. We were at an impasse.

“Noct, let go,” I said lowly.

“No chance in hell,” he growled back.

“I’m warning you.”

“Oh yeah? And what’re you gonna do if I don’t?”

_“This.”_

I tore myself away from him, drew my arm back, and just barely remembered one of my hand-to-hand combat lessons with Gladio. My arm dipped down to come back up and my fist met his stomach. Adrenaline still flowing strongly, an explosion of ice sent him flying. My hands flew up to cover my mouth. I had _not_ meant to use that much power. Thankfully, Noctis knew how to handle himself and warped back down.

“Holy shit!” He jogged back laughing. “Man, we _gotta_ show that to Gladio and Ignis! You finally managed to almost beat me!”

“What do you mean, _almost?”_ I cried, clearly distressed from my ever apparent lack of control. “I could have _killed you!”_

“Woah, hey, it’s okay. That was amazing, _______. I could’ve used the armiger against you, y’know.”

“...But still…”

“No buts. You should be proud of yourself. You’re getting a lot better.”

_“That. Was. AWESOME!”_ Prompto came prancing over - with Noctis’ phone in hand. “I got the whole thing! Man, I wish I had my camera! Can you imagine the quality?!”

He turned to me.

“Since when could you do _that?”_

He meant the ice explosion. My body chilled at the memory of what Noct had told me about me being possessed.

“_______…?”

“I’m sorry…!” I whisper-sobbed, clutching at my hair with both hands. “I’m so sorry, Noctis. I’m sorry!”

“Hey, no, don’t-!” Noctis tried to get me to calm down. “That wasn’t- This has no connection to what happened earlier! Okay? You’re good. We’re _happy_ about it, see?”

I glanced up at them. Prompto was bouncing on his feet with excitement. Noctis looked concerned but otherwise proud with a half smile on his face.

“And honestly, that’s absolutely nothing compared to Leviathan and Titan.”

_Right… He’s been through a lot worse…_

“Okay…” I breathed slowly. “I’ll… try to remember that.”

“Good. You better.”

“I must say,” said someone behind me, “that passion of yours does fuel your technique _significantly._ When you are riled up properly, that is.”

Instantly, my whole being brightened like a glimpse of the sun on a heavy, cloudy day. I twirled around to see Vayne making his way out to us. With a happy, giggly gasp, I bounded over to greet him.

“You’re back!” I said with a wide smile. I grabbed his arm and began to pull him over to Noctis. He jerked forward with a huff before giving in to my antics. “There’s someone I want you to meet!”

“Oh?” he asked, amused at how quickly I’d recovered. “And who would this be?”

“Prompto!” I called out to my friend as we reached them. “Prompto, this is Vayne!”

“Whaaat?” Prompto said, eyes shining as he recognized the name. He glanced Vayne over. “No way. Really?”

“Yeah, that’s him,” Noctis said. “The others can say what they want, but he’s been a big help to ______.”

“Ah,” Vayne reached a revelation. “One of your friends from Eos?”

“Yep!” My arms subconsciously stayed latched around Vayne’s left. “He’s Noct’s and my best friend.”

Vayne brought his right hand to his chest and gave a short bow. “It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

Prompto cocked his head. “Hmm… Youuu’re… exactly how I thought you’d be, to be honest.”

“And how would that be?” Noctis asked.

“Kinda like Ignis but, like, more _regal._ The hair’s a surprise, though. Didn’t imagine it’d be _that long.”_ Prompto stuttered as he noticed he was rambling. “Uh, I mean, it looks great on _you._ Don’t know about me, heheh…”

Vayne thankfully didn’t stare at him weirdly. Instead, he just laughed quietly.

“I see you and _______ share similar nervous dispositions,” he said amicably.

“Uh, not really,” Prompto said. He perked up again. “I’m a _lot_ more outgoing!”

“I’ll say…” I muttered. I glanced down and jolted back, releasing Vayne’s arm. “O-oh, sorry…”

Prompto and Noctis snickered.

“It’s like watching you and Luna all over again,” Prompto said. Noctis elbowed him. Hard. “Owww…! That hurt!”

“Sh-shut up…” Noctis mumbled. “‘Least I didn’t attack you, like _______ did.”

That agitated me. “Hey, _I_ didn’t take photos of someone while they weren’t even consciously aware!”

“It- It was cute! ...And for blackmail.”

“Aha! He _admits_ it!”

“...Photographs?” Vayne intervened. “Of what, exactly?”

_“Don’t. Answer. That.”_

“Of… you and _______, I think,” Prompto answered anyway. “Right?”

My hands slapped to cover my face. Embarrassed warmth washed over me like a heatwave. Vayne shifted next to me.

“Noctis,” he said smoothly, steeling his gaze to quietly reprimand Noctis for photographing him without his knowledge. “Do you recall what I said about _‘no strenuous activity’?”_

“O-oh, um…” Noct rubbed the back of his neck. “I-I mean, she lunged at me first.”

I glared at him over my fingers. Vayne’s arms were behind his back.

“That is hardly an excuse,” Vayne said sternly.

“Oh, yeah,” Prompto whispered, watching the scolding unfold. “He’s Ignis Two-point-Oh.”

Vayne’s eyes flashed from Noct to Prompto, who gulped.

“I will assume you are new to our ‘situation’,” Vayne said, “and thus will not hold you accountable. _However.”_

He regarded Noctis again.

“She is in no state to be involved in such intensive training. Not spiritually, not mentally.”

He rounded on _me._

“And as for you… I _told_ you to take care of yourself.”

“I-I didn’t-!” I protested, shrinking back. “No one told me I shouldn’t be doing things…”

Vayne glared at Noctis, who swallowed, and huffed, irritated.

“I cannot leave you three to your own devices, can I?” he sighed.

“Not without Ignis,” we chorused, somewhat shamefully and amusedly at once.

“Then I pray he shows up soon or dearest _______ shall be coming with me.”

_D-dearest…?_

Noctis did not look amused. “I’m not letting her out of my sight again.”

“Uh, why?” Prompto asked. “I mean, why’s she gotta with you? Not that there’s anything wrong with that.”

“Because every time I leave, she gets herself into trouble,” Vayne explained, giving me a disciplinary look. I gazed at the ground, one hand gripping the other. “I’d rather not risk any other dangers finding their way to her, as I’m sure you understand. So unless you begin to implement more prudent measures to ensure her safety…”

“She’s getting ‘kidnapped’ again,” Noctis finished. “Got it. We’ll be more careful.”

“I’m not going to be _kidnapped,”_ I pouted, crossing my arms. “As long as I can check in with you guys, I’ll go willingly.”

Satisfied, Vayne said, “There we have it. Now that we have settled that…”

He turned to face me with a gentler expression.

“Might I trouble the lady for a stroll?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear I’m trying to get us back to the main plot but Opera Omnia is fucking _endless..._ And I tried looking up translations of the chapters that haven’t been released (on YouTube and nothing has subtitles...) and they’re not on the wiki so... I guess we’ll have to either wait or I can keep looking :/
> 
> Anyway, more Vayne!! Because I can’t help myself...


	60. Mellitus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vayne and Reader go for a walk!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “Sweetened with honey”
> 
> Be prepared for fLUFF
> 
>  
> 
> you’re gonna hate me lol

There was something strange about being alone with Vayne after having been kidnapped and used for ill purposes. He was a tad overprotective (maybe more than a tad), and now seemed almost solely dedicated to keeping me safe. The energy between us had somehow changed. Walking next to him, the air felt charged with anticipation. I wanted to ask him what he thought of what happened in the throne room. At the same time, I was worried I’d receive another earful about being careful.

We strolled along in a somewhat comfortable silence for a few minutes. Perhaps he wanted to get away from Noctis and Prompto’s teasing looks before any conversation began. My thoughts worked me into a small fit of anxiety. It felt like there were bees in my chest, buzzing around in a frenzy. My fingers flexed instinctively, wanting something to stim with. Usually playing with the end of my jacket or its zipper worked but this time… I had to keep my hand from seeking his so I could hold it.

My body wanted to be pressed up against him. Hand holding would suffice, though. Any sort of contact would be nice. I wasn’t used to craving physical affection. It had never been something I enjoyed. People used to find hugs from me special because I rarely gave them. Now, I _needed_ to cuddle. I needed all the snuggles in the world and no one but Vayne would fit the criteria. No one.

_What do I do…? According to Noctis, I already got a free demo of affection from him earlier… No wonder I want more._

I sighed helplessly and tried my best to be satisfied with simply walking next to him.

“I trust you are feeling better…?” Vayne asked quietly once we breached the forest we had been walking towards. The shade from the trees calmed me ever so slightly. I hummed a yes in response. “I have never seen your brother so enraged. I feared the worst.”

“...I’m sorry…”

He came to a slow stop and turned to face me. “Whatever for?”

I stared ahead at the trees. “...I wasn’t as careful as I should've been…”

“I believe you did your best to uphold your promise. From what I heard, you hadn’t even touched anything.”

“...Mm…” I couldn’t meet his eyes. Two hands pushed my hair back to cup my face, lifting it so I could see him.

“_______, _none_ of what occurred was your fault. That flower was a well-placed ploy. Even Noctis told me he felt compelled by it.”

“But he still resisted it.”

“Because it was not for him. ..._______, do you know what tuberoses symbolize?”

“...I didn’t know they _had_ a meaning.”

His eyes darkened and he took a small step forward. “They symbolize _dangerous, forbidden pleasures._ To the right person, you could certainly be considered one of them.”

I felt numb when those words left his lips. The Emperor wanted my magic, I knew that much. But to think me a _pleasure?_ A _forbidden_ pleasure? The thought of what he could’ve been thinking of me, what he could've _done_ to me after taking my consciousness… My stomach did a small, uncomfortable flip.

_I think I’m gonna be sick._

_“I feel violated,”_ I whispered, terrified. A thumb gently stroked my cheek. His gloves were soft. “I don't know what happened after… I…”

I bit my lip to keep from panicking at what could have happened after I fell unconscious.

“Neither do I,” Vayne said lowly. “Noctis showed both me and the spirit moogle where you had been taken. As I said, I feared the worst when I saw the crystal flower.”

“It was so pretty, though…”

“Did he attempt anything, _______? Did he touch you, take advantage of you?”

I shook my head. “I was in a cage. He couldn’t really reach me. Only his magic could. Nothing hurt in, um, _that…_ way…”

A long, relieved sigh exited him. “I thought for a moment I would have to start yet another head hunt.”

“...Thank you for helping me…” I would’ve tried to shyly hide away in my hair if he hadn’t been holding me.

“You needn’t thank me, darling.” His hands moved down a tiny bit so they touched my neck. “I promised you I will always be there when you need me.”

His hands slowly slipped off of me, but for some reason my own decided to catch them.

_Please don’t stop. It feels nice._

I brought our paired hands between us and held them there. Vayne’s head tipped a hair to the side, eyebrows somewhat furrowed in confusion.

“_______…?”

_Please don’t leave me again._

But I couldn’t say it. It didn’t seem fair for him to constantly have to be by my side. I had Noctis, after all, and Prompto. ...But I’d still have them when I returned to Eos. I wouldn’t have Vayne.

_I’ll miss you._

_What’s the matter with you? It’s not like you’re leaving just yet!_

“Noct told me most of what happened…” I choked, forcing my sad emotions down. “But I don’t… really trust him to tell me whether or not I hurt someone…”

An understanding hum left Vayne. “Nothing severe. I managed to negate the effects of your magic before any real harm could be done.”

It was my turn to tilt my head. “Yeah, he told me. Um… How…?”

“It is called nethicite,” Vayne explained, somewhat proudly. “An energy source similar to magicite.”

I blinked, confused, but let him talk.

“It has the power to absorb magic. Thankfully, I had some on my person. However, I did not expect to use it as I did with you.”

“What happened to it?”

His gaze shifted to the side. I detected that his grit teeth meant he was frustrated.

“I was forced to destroy it,” he said simply. “The other Ivaliceans do not trust me with it, rightfully so, considering our history. They deemed it - and correctly, I suppose - to be far too dangerous when exposed to your magic.”

“Why?”

“Your magic is incredibly potent. A chunk of nethicite filled with it would be a bomb waiting to burst. A significant supply of power.”

“...Is that what you were originally going to use me for?”

A short breath left him at my distrust of his previous intentions.

“______, I was never going to _use_ you for anything,” he said. I raised a brow, not quite believing that bullshit. “...Though I _will_ admit, I am rather curious to see how powerful you would he when exposed to the Mist.”

I decided to be honest with him. “I don’t know what any of this is. Like, Mist, magicite. ...Is it just… magic energy?”

His eyes lit up proudly at my quick deduction. “Yes, precisely.”

“Oh. Okay. All I know is the Magitek stuff Niflheim uses.”

He let out an exhalation of laughter. “Perhaps they are similar.”

“...I don’t know. They use daemons, I think. Those aren’t… They aren’t exactly… safe, y’know?”

“Well, if it is effective…”

“Coal’s effective. Doesn’t mean it’s good for the environment. But that’s a whole other story for another day…”

“True.” He shifted to stand up a tad straighter, as if that we possible. “Nethicite aside, what I truly wish to know is your wellbeing. The way that tyrant separated the magicks in your soul left you exhausted. I’m actually surprised you weren’t left with physical manifestations of the light taking over. No coughing, no blood… Just an unconscious body.”

“...I think my mind was separated, too.” My thumbs ran over the backs of his hands. “There was just darkness. I could feel myself moving, but… It was like the ultimate coziness, where you don’t care about what’s going on. You just want to be comfortable.”

“A dangerous state to be in.”

I nodded. “A recurring problem in my life.”

A solemn silence fell over us. I could tell we both wanted to say something, but… I didn’t know _what_ to say. I just wanted to keep talking to him, to keep hearing how much he cared for me because I couldn’t get enough of it. I’d never known this sort of feeling before. Romantic love. It was… Well, it’s no wonder everyone loves it so much. It’s like the joyous feeling you get eating your favorite dessert. A sort of sweet, savoury feeling swirling around in your chest. I didn’t want it to go, didn’t want _him_ to go.

_How do I make him stay?_

“Will you ever travel with us again?” I asked shyly, peering up at him sheepishly. Our hands were still connected. He thought for a moment, face betraying no emotion.

“We shall see,” he finally answered. “It depends on the information I discover and that which I receive from your comrades. Though, I’d rather take you _with_ me than the other way around.”

“Mm…” I didn’t think Noctis would like that. “I miss you when you’re gone…”

I hadn’t really meant to say it out loud. It was more of a spoken thought than an active confession. Even so, I instantly regretted opening my stupid mouth.

He chuckled, his right hand leaving my left to come and tilt my chin up. “Do you…?”

Heat blossomed over my cheeks for the millionth time that day. My eyes rapidly glanced everywhere to avoid eye contact. “U-um, w-well, I mean… I… Um… Kind of…?”

“________. Please be honest with me.”

I sighed, heart sinking and knowing I couldn’t get out of it this time. “Yes… I don’t mean to be clingy… I’m trying to… _not_ be…”

“I never thought you to be.” His thumb swiped from my chin to my jaw. “I enjoy indulging in your reliance on me.”

The furnace heat had returned to my face.

“Perhaps I am simply the type to enjoy taking care of those dear to me.”

_Dear to him…?_

“And ensuring their safety and protection.”

_Is this a confession?!_

“And given your penchant for mischief, I have my work cut out for me.”

_Oh… Right…_

“I swear I’ve never been this high maintenance before…” I cringed at myself. “But then someone put a sword and magic in my hands.”

“Indulging in your own fantasies never hurts,” Vayne encouraged before saying more seriously, “as long as you don’t overdo it.”

“I know… I’m trying!”

I glanced back down.

“I really do miss you, though…”

“There is no reason to sadden yourself. If you need me, just call.”

“...But I don’t want to bother you. What if you're busy?”

He sighed. “For goodness’ sake…” His other hand left my grasp. “We have been over this.”

“I know, but… I can’t help it…!”

His free hand made sure I couldn’t hide in my hair. “What must I do to prove to you that you are in no way a nuisance or a burden to me?”

“...” I tried to think straight, but he was so close… His warmth infiltrated my mind. I couldn’t think of anything else. “I don’t… I don’t know…”

“Then what must I do to show you I _care?”_

“You have! ...I remember… waking up… when, um… after the… battle…”

“You are mischief incarnate, aren’t you?” he teased gently. “We had our suspicions. ...You should have said something.”

“...You were really warm… And…” I tried bowing my head to escape his intense yet soft gaze. “Comforting…”

“...Were you dreaming of me?”

My heart fluttered. “I wasn’t really… dreaming of anything… I just woke up, heard voices, and when I realized you were… um… holding me, I just… It felt… nice…”

All was quiet. All was quiet except for our nervous breaths. Unspoken words of questioning traveled between us as I timidly looked up at him. His eyes were heavy as he attempted to mask his emotions and failed. I was worried about what he would say next. He already had me close, warm and safe. What would happen now?

He tenderly pulled me into a full embrace. My entire being jumped into Happiness Mode as I readily returned the gesture. I was getting my cuddles!! Finally!!

_He’s warm…_

I felt his chin rest on the top of my head.

“Please do not scare me like that again,” he whispered. “I do not know what would happen were we to lose you for good.”

“I’ll be more careful…” I snuggled closer. If I was a kitten, I would’ve won the Guinness World Record for loudest purr. His light armor made the hug a bit stiff, but I dealt with it anyway. My Aspie senses were in heaven.

_I don’t want to let go…_

Slowly, in the midst of comfort, I closed my eyes instinctively began to hum one of my favorite tunes. I had discovered Undertale music to be an auditory stim and thus used it when I was comfortable enough to. That being said, the leitmotif from His Theme and Memory calmly drifted from my vocal chords and into our ears. Since it was a repeated few measures, I only sang it a handful of times before stopping.

“...What have you done to me…?” I heard him mutter to himself as I continued. I didn’t answer, thinking he was probably talking to himself. My eyelids felt heavy, like I could drift off into sleep again. Maybe Noct and I could take another nap on the airship… “_______…?”

“Mmm…?”

“Do try not to fall asleep.”

I yawned and sleepily gazed up at him. “What’ll happen if I do?”

“Then I will be forced to carry you all the way back when we return to your friends.”

I groaned. “Do I _have_ to go back? They’ll just tease me again.”

“Tease you?” He laughed. I could feel the chuckles rumbling through his chest. “Is _that_ why you and Noctis were fighting?”

I pouted. “He’s a jerk.”

“Brothers often are. Though I must say, whoever taught you the technique for the ending explosive must be proud.”

“I’ll tell Gladio you send your regards. He’s my primary teacher.”

“Well, he has done well in teaching you the basics of hand to hand combat.”

Since he was an expert in that field, I felt the heat of embarrassment come back with his compliment. I hid my face back in his chest. My next words were muffled. “Well, I’m glad because it _hurt.”_

“Your hard work will pay off in the end.”

“It better or I’ll be peeved.”

I righted myself to look at him and propped my chin on his chest. He was now extremely close and gazing down at me with a soft sort of seriousness. A soothing calm poured over us. I tugged him a bit closer. The anticipation from before returned. It was less intense but still noticeable. His eyes held a light in them that hinted he was refraining from something.

_...Vayne…?_

The longer I watched him, the nearer he became. Was he really getting closer or was I dreaming? What would happen?

_Will he kiss me?_

Would I be able to handle it?

_I hope he does…_

What should I wish?

_Please kiss me…_

To be friends or to have the fleeting romance my heart was yearning for?

_...I’ll probably only have this as my only romantic experience before Noct and I… Before we…_

I felt myself stiffen as he used his hands to adjust me properly. The very tops of our foreheads now rested together. The jade of his eyes bore into my own. A sliver of fear went through me at being so open and vulnerable to someone. I shoved it down.

_Please…_

A moment passed. So did another. I recalled a scientific study about how gazing into someone’s eyes can make you fall in love with them. My heart desperately wished that would happen now.

One of his hands came to rest on my cheek, stroking it gently. My eyes closed. The warmth, the safety, the love in my heart was so comforting. I wanted to drown in it. Bury me in it so I never have to leave. Let me make a cocoon to burrow into. Make sure I never have to go anywhere without it.

Something brushed my nose. Oh. It was his. ...Was he _that close?_ I didn’t dare open my eyes as the arm around my waist tugged me flush against him. He felt firm under me, hot. It was safe here. I was protected. Slowly but surely I felt his breath meet mine. Was he hesitating? Was something wrong? Did he not want to or did he think it wasn’t a good idea? Right as his lips almost touched mine…

...My phone went off.

 

My mind _screeched_ at me to ignore it as music graced our ears. Vayne’s lips were gently, just _barely_ brushing mine and I did _not_ want the moment to be ruined. Neither of us moved for a few seconds. Then I cracked my eyes open. A disappointed but resigned emotion rested in his eyes. Like he knew this would happen and that it wasn’t _meant_ to happen. No. Like _hell_ I would let my phone be a dick.

My right hand went for my pocket to tell my phone to _shut the hell up_ as my left reached up to hook around Vayne’s neck. I got to feel his soft, brown hair as I did so. At the same time, he tried to straighten himself up to respectfully let me see what was going on. Due to our own actions, we ended up separating an inch or two but were still very close.

An awkward air settled over us. He cleared his throat.

“Should you… not check that device of yours?” he asked lowly.

“Ignore it,” I said, voice wavering slightly as my nerves returned. What if he changed his mind? He said nothing. “...Vayne?”

Nothing.

“...Vayne…?”

His eyes darkened. That wasn’t an expression I was familiar with. Had I said something wrong?

“We shouldn’t…” he said thickly. His teeth ground together. He was restraining himself again. “I shouldn’t have…”

He swallowed. My heart sank.

_He changed his mind._

Still, instead of pushing me away, he pulled me closer again. My eyes sparkled with joy and hope as he leaned down, his hand now angling me the right way, and… softly kissed my forehead.

I tried so damn hard not to be disappointed. I really did. His eyes met my confused ones as he gently detached himself from me.

“Vayne…?”

“You should return to your brother,” he said, voice still thick. “I’m sure that was him contacting you.”

“But-...”

“We will have plenty of time for…” He composed him. “We will have plenty of time to talk later.”

“...Oh…” My gaze dropped. “Okay… If… if that’s what… If that’s what you want…”

He tilted my chin up. “I promise you that we will.”

There was something shimmering in his eyes that told me to trust him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Told ya. I wanted them to finally kiss this chapter but then I was like “hmmm kinda wanna wait until Ignis gets here” so then _that_ happened.  
> Please don’t hate me too much XD


	61. Ashe, Dust, and Sand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time with our traveling companions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Eravanthia for giving me the idea for Reader using Let It Go from Frozen to mess with Ashe :D

_“Noctis!”_ I hissed. Vayne had released me back to my brother’s care after departing in a Torsion once he made sure I got back safely. “What the _hell_ is _wrong with you?!”_

“‘The hell’s wrong with me’?” he shot back. “The hell’s wrong with _you?”_

“You _idiot._ You just _ruined_ what _would have_ been my _first kiss,_ you- ugH-!”

I summoned one of my books and began to whack him with it. He attempted to defend himself while Prompto tried to get the book away from me.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” Noctis choked out as I continued to wail on him with a hardback history _textbook._ “Dammit, that actually _hurts!”_

Prompto went for my hands and managed to snatch the book. I whined and crossed my arms. “Fuck you guys.”

“I, uh, am sorry…” Noctis scratched his head. “But the airship’s all ready to go. We’re heading back to the Dark World. ...I, uh, I guess I didn’t realize you’d actually… act on your feelings just yet.”

I huffed, annoyed. “It was a heat of the moment kinda thing.”

“Still… It’s a start.”

We headed to the airship and proceeded to board it. Prompto thought it was amazing. As usual, he was all bouncy and happy and just generally having a blast now that we were on an adventure together again. We made our way to the top where the wind blew chilly, cooling my heated skin down. I will never get used to climbing that rope.

We found a spot to hang out in, not too near other people but not too far. I found a place to sit and plopped down, breathing heavily from the last few hours’ activities. Prompto was taking in the airship, desperately wishing he had his camera.

“Man, I can’t believe I forgot it!” he complained to himself. “Can you imagine showing Gladio and Ignis pictures of _another world?”_

“Well it’s not like you knew you were coming here,” Noctis commented.

“I took some for you, actually,” I said, patting the spot to my right. “Figured you like that.”

“Aw, sweet!” Prompto cheered. “Thanks! Lemme see!”

I pulled up the Photos app and let him take all the time he needed to view the places I’d captured. As he did that, Noctis took the opportunity to tease me yet again, though more gently this time.

“So, first kiss, huh?” he said lightly. “I’m actually surprised you haven’t had one yet.”

“Same here!” Prompto added, glancing up for a split second. “I mean, I see you as a friend, but like - you’re not _not_ attractive.”

My cheeks tinged pink. I pulled my legs up and hugged them. “Well, I mean, no one’s ever… um… y-y’know…”

“No one’s ever what?” Noctis asked. “Shown interest in you?”

“Not really, no.” I forced a smile. “But that’s okay. I’ll be fine with just friends and fam- with just friends.”

“Well, I call bullshit on that.”

“How is that possible?!” Prompto finally looked up. “You’re a really great person, _______! All the guys on Earth must be _blind_ or something. Or deaf, ‘cause you play a mean piano. No taste whatsoever!”

I giggled. “Thanks.”

“But on another yet similar note: if you _almost_ got your first kiss, just what _were_ you guys talkin’ ‘bout? Hmmmm…?”

Prompto waggled his eyebrows. I half-laughed, flustered. “Um, just about various things concerning my kidnapping. I learned about nethicite and Mist. And also about tuberoses, which symbolize dangerous pleasures.”

“Tuberoses?” Noct repeated. “That the flower that caught you?”

I nodded. Noctis’ gaze steeled.

“If we see that tyrant again, he’s gonna have _another_ reckoning.”

“Buuuut what about Vayne?” Prompto redirected the conversation towards something much more pleasant. “You’ve been pining over him for, like, _weeks.”_

I blushed fully this time and rested my head on my knees. “I, um… I got…” I averted my eyes to the floor. “I got a forehead kiss.”

“Awwww!!”

Noctis chuckled. “Of course you did. ...He really cares about you, y’know. He told me himself and his actions speak pretty damn loudly, if you ask me.”

The furnace returned to my face. “Yeah, I know… It’s still hard to believe…”

“As it should be.” We all glanced up to see Ashe standing there. “I’ve never known Vayne to use such a cruel ploy but I wouldn’t hold it past him.”

“Uh, who are you?” Prompto asked before Noct or I could respond. Both our eyes were narrow. Prom was just confused.

“Princess Ashelia B’nargin Dalmasca.”

I coughed. “Gesundheit.” She glared at me.

“What do you want?” Noctis asked flatly. “And why should we care?”

“Forgive me,” she said. I didn’t think she was actually sorry. “But I couldn’t help but overhear your… _conversation.”_

“Isn’t that called eavesdropping?” Prompto quickly picked up on our distaste towards this person. Ashe was ever so slightly taken aback by his straightforwardness.

“I… Not exactly… It didn’t sound like you were trying to keep quiet…”

“Doesn’t matter if we were or not,” Noctis said, arms crossed. “Listening in on other people’s business is considered rude where I’m from.”

I raised my hand. “Seconded.”

“Look,” Ashe said to me, clearly frustrated. “I honestly am trying to help you. Vayne isn’t to be trusted. It doesn’t matter how many nice things he does. His hands are soaked in blood and he'll use your magic to further cleanse them in it.”

I blinked. “Why doesn’t he just wash them off, then?”

“Wash them o-?” She stiffened, irate. “Of all the _insensitive-!”_

“I don’t get how it’s impossible for you to consider that people have more than one side to them,” Noctis said. “If all you came to do is cause trouble, then I’ll have to ask you to leave.”

“I’m not here to stir up conflict! I’m here to tell _her-”_ She gestured to me. “-that the man she is so _clearly_ infatuated with isn’t what she’s dreamed him to be.”

I quelled the bubbling anger threatening to enter my veins. Instead, a brilliant thought popped into my head. I’d just have to hope she wouldn’t yeet me off the airship.

“I don’t know, man,” I said, feigning a chill expression. “Sounds like you really need to _let it go.”_

“‘Let it go’?” Ashe repeated angrily. “You want me to _let go_ of all the horrendous things Vayne has done? To other nations _and_ my own?”

I lifted one hand and summoned a single flurry of a snowflake. “Conceal, don’t feel, my friend.”

“You and I are _not_ **friends.”**

“Uh, maybe we should end this conversation now…?” Prompto suggested.

“Don’t let them know…” I stood. “Well. Now we know. You really need to just let it go.”

A puff of snow and ice sprouted from my open palm like fireworks.

“Let it go!”

I did the same with my other hand.

“I really can’t hold it back anymore.” I looked her in her bewildered eyes. _“Let it go._ Let it go. Just turn away and slam the door.”

She flinched as a spiral of flaky ice shot out and nearly hit her.

_“I_ don’t _care…_ What you’re going to say… Let my storm rage on.”

I sent one final burst of magic into the air, light blue sparks of ice crystals glinting in the sun.

“The cold and calculated type never bothered me anyway.”

The small area around us went quiet. Ashe was staring at me like I was insane. Prompto was desperately trying to hold back his giggles and failing. Noctis glanced back and forth between us, amused but otherwise expressionless. I, myself, stood waiting for Ashe for respond.

“I-I…” she stammered. She regained her senses, giving me the Angry Eyes. “I have _never_ met someone so _insensitive_ and _childish._ I thought you might understand what it’s like to have your home taken from you, but it would appear that I stand corrected.”

I frowned, fingers twitching with crackling electricity.

_Deep breaths… ...Good._

My shoulders relaxed. I had a good comeback ready for fire.

“First of all-” I began.

“The hell is wrong with you?” Noctis cut me off. Prompto was standing now, too. It wasn’t often I saw him without a smile. The sight of it was pretty frightening. “You really got that much of a problem with her being friends with someone?”

“My ‘problem’,” Ashe stated, “is who she is friends _with._ Though it _sounds_ like they’re _more than friends_ at this point…!”

“And how is that bad, exactly?” Prompto asked. “I know some people have screwed up morals, but Vayne seems nice enough to me. And sometimes bad people can do good things!” He glanced at me and Noct. “Like Ardyn!”

“Ardyn tried to _kill Luna,”_ Noct growled. “Vayne has literally saved ________ 's life - _several_ times over by now.”

“Okay!” I interrupted. “Guys, I can handle myself.”

“Can you?” Ashe mocked, getting angrier by the second at our apparent hypocrisy. “Or do you need _Vayne_ to do everything for you? I worked _hard_ to free Dalmasca from the Empire, to bring _justice_ to them for their crimes. _Two years_ it took, but I was _not_ going to relent. And what do you do? You’re just-! _Joking around_ with your friends!”

“Imma stop you right there.” I shifted my weight and began fiddling with my jacket zipper. “First of all, the differences between our situations are _massive.”_

“Oh, are they?”

My eyes narrowed. “Yes. They are. I’m from another fucking _planet_ than Noct’s, in case you’ve forgotten. Tell me: how exactly the _fuck_ am I supposed to even _get_ home let alone avenge it?”

She was silent.

“Second of all: you must have a _really_ hard time letting things go because the average time it takes someone to get over the loss of a loved one is six months to two years. I’m surprised you didn’t die from all the stress you put yourself under if think you having fun with friends and _occasionally distracting yourself_ is a death penalty crime.”

“I never said-!”

“Excuse you, I’m not done. _Third._ Vayne told me your country is _literally_ sitting right between two giant empires. Is that correct?”

“...Yes… And…?”

I gave her my best contorted face of bewilderment. “Then what the fuck did you _expect_ to happen? ‘Oh we’re sitting between two empires, it's not like we’ll get invaded or anything!’ Seriously? What kind of logic is that?”

_“How dare you make such mockery of Dalmasca!”_ Ashe drew her sword. “I will not stand for this! You have _no right_ to be in this group after following Vayne!”

I didn’t bother summoning Ithilcalad. Noctis and Prompto braced themselves for a fight.

“I’m gonna give you one chance to leave her alone,” Prompto warned. “I get you’ve been through some pretty bad stuff, but at least you can return home. ________ can’t.”_

“What he said,” Noctis agreed. “And didn’t you technically agree to _work with_ Vayne? That’s pretty unfair.”

“Unfair?” Ashe repeated, outraged. _“Unfair?_ You’re calling _me_ unfair when you apparently know _exactly_ what it’s like to deal with dangerous but outwardly nice people?”

Noctis’ sword glimmered into his hand as he stepped forward angrily. I shook my head.

“The difference between Ardyn and Vayne,” I said, “is that Ardyn has unknown, malicious motives. Vayne just wants to protect what he loves. I _know_ that doesn’t excuse the things he’s done, but his _intentions_ are somewhat good, wouldn’t you say?”

“I think that’s enough for one day,” Balthier, Vaan, Fran, and Penelo came walking over, having realized Ashe and I were butting heads again. “Why don’t we agree to disagree? And from what little we heard, I’d say they’ve made some rather rational points.”

“I don’t like it either,” Vaan said to Ashe. “But… It’s kinda hard to believe Vayne _doesn’t_ at least care for her a _little_ bit after we finally got to see them together.”

He glanced at me.

“But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be careful!”

“Alright, alright,” Balthier stopped him. “We'll be taking Ashe from here. I’ll try to talk some sense into her.”

“Sense?!” she exclaimed. _“She’s_ the one who needs _sense!”_

“Um, Ashe?” Penelo said cautiously. “Don’t you think they’re… a _little_ cute together? I bet if Larsa was here-...”

“If Larsa was here, he’d be warning her, too!”

“Actually, I’m not sure that he would,” Balthier countered. “Given that Vayne seems… somewhat assuaged by ______, here, he might believe her to be a good influence.”

“I can’t believe this…”

“As I said before, let the girl pine in peace. If Larsa _does_ show up at some point, I’m sure he can give us all the correct way to be thinking about all this.”

As they pulled her away, Noctis hissed under his breath.

“If she does this again, I can’t be held responsible for my actions,” he seethed. “At least _your_ loss was recent!”

“So was yours,” I said lowly.

“Still… She doesn’t have to be a bitch about it.”

“I don’t think she really _gets_ ______,” Prompto added. “Like, she isn’t even _trying.”_

Noctis dropped to the floor to sit. “I wish Ignis was here. He’d know how to handle this.”

“That’s why I call that guy Not-Ignis,” I said, joining him. “Besides the odd resemblance.”

“...Oh my gods, he _does_ look like Ignis!” Prompto realized loudly. A second passed. And then we burst into laughter.

 

“Alright! This is the last one!”

Prompto had managed to drag me on a quick adventure with a handful of people. We had reached the ruined city I had been kidnapped in only to be ambushed by some larger monsters that wouldn’t let us pass. We spread out to rid the area of them before continuing to our next destination in the Dark World. Prompto and I found ourselves fighting off daemonic imps with a small handful of people.

“Wicked cool!” Prompto said cheerfully. “I gotta get this shot…!”

He paused and his shoulders fell.

“Oh, that’s right. I don’t have it…”

“What’s the matter?” Maria asked. “Did you lose something?”

“No… I was looking for my camera, but I guess I left it back home.”

I could practically feel the disappointment radiating off him.

“Your camera?” a nice girl named Tifa asked. “Why now?”

“Well, everyone looks so cool when fighting!” Prompto explained enthusiastically. “So I wanted to take a few pictures.”

“I am pretty cool, aren’t I?” Jecht came walking over. “I can’t argue with you there.”

“But in the middle of a fight?” Tifa inquired, concerned. “Isn’t that dangerous?”

“Prompto’s actually really good at that,” I praised. “He’s got dedication.”

“Aww, thanks, _______!” Prompto laughed.

“That’s how much he loves taking photos!” a man in a cowboy hat said. “I have a video camera, so I know how much fun it can be.”

“You’re a video guy, Irvine? Sometimes you just can’t control the urge to record something, right?”

“Sounds like a sphere,” Jecht commented. “People were crazy about those back home.”

_Weird how camera exist on so many different worlds._

“Art thou perhaps talking about machines?” a knight called Cyan asked curiously.

“Sorry!” Prompto said, somewhat embarrassed. “I guess cameras don’t really exist in your world…”

“Are cameras and pictures… fun?” Maria asked.

“Cameras can make instant portraits,” Irvine explained patiently. “Some can even record movement.”

“That sounds quite convenient,” Cyan said. “In that case, I had best prepare my finest attire…”

“Oh! We’re not making portraits!” Prompto jumped in. “I just wanted to make a record of the fight…”

I hummed, thoughtful.

“But you can record the moment in your heart,” Maria said, confused. “Or is that not enough…?”

“Indeed,” Cyan agreed. “If thou can record those in thy heart, then there’s no need to endanger thyself further.”

His way of speaking reminded me of all the medieval tapestry memes I had seen on Earth.

_Thar goes! Last fuck I giveth._

“It’s difficult to explain,” Irvine said. “I guess the excitement of photography just doesn’t come across in words…”

“But…” Prompto began. “If you have a picture, then you can show it to other people!”

“Why would you do that?” Maria asked.

“So the people who weren’t there can see what you saw. That way you can share your memories.”

“That sounds wonderful! If you can make a moving portrait right away, then you can show people things that can’t be described in words!”

“A picture paints a thousand words,” I added.

“Exactly!” Prompto said, getting energized now that Maria and Cyan were catching on. “And not just things like a battle, but everyday things, too.”

“Everyday things…” Cyan said wistfully. “Such as one’s family?”

“Yeah, of course! There are loads of people who keep photos of their children! And _______ has shown me pictures of her pets before, too! They’re so cute!”

I smiled.

“I see…” Cyan’s gaze lowered to the ground. “I would like to have one of those, too…”

“Well, why don’t we take pictures of each other home, then?” Prompto suggested happily.

“But you don’t have a camera, do you?” Jecht reminded him.

“Oh, you’re right...! Guess I’ll just have to keep the memories of you folks in my heart!”

I sighed and slipped my phone out of my pocket. “Here. Go nuts. Just don’t break it.”

Prompto gasped. “Seriously?! Are you sure?”

“Yeah, just be careful. If you break it…”

“I’m dead meat, got it. Thanks, _______!”

 

Our next stop was rather intriguing. It looked to be another city, empty and desolate, but wasn't nearly as ruined. It reminded me of Egypt, actually. All around us was a desert, hot and dry. The city itself seemed to be ancient. The walls of the buildings were tan with a few intricate, colored patterns painted onto them. It was enough to make me think of Solheim, though their architectural styles weren’t _too_ similar. Maybe if the people of Solheim had lived in a desert…

I found myself walking alongside Terra, a few of her friends, and Mog. Noctis and a friend of Y’shtola’s, Alisaie, tagged along, as well, making up the rear. Prompto had given me my phone back - I had decided to give it to him only when he really needed it - and now snapped my own photos of the city.

In a decently sized square, we came to a stop. The ground beneath us had been molded and colored to look like an exotic rug but without the actual rug. Mog was scanning the area for anything useful. I gazed around at the turrets of the high walls that enclosed us. It must be a fortress of some kind.

“Is there really something here, kupo?” Mog finally said.

“You don’t see anything, Mog?” Terra asked. I let my ears zoom in on their conversation. The others came to gather round, Noctis taking a place next to me.

“That doesn’t sound good, now does it?” said a treasure hunter by the name of Locke.

“Huh?” Noctis zoned in. “Well… If you guys think something’s up, I guess there must be.”

“I have nothing but bad memories of this town,” grumbled a long haired man. His name was Setzer. “The goddess said that this world was meant to be a respite for us, and yet…”

“There’s no respite for my heart here,” Terra said solemnly. That really told me something was wrong. She was usually so positive and kind.

“Meaning this place might be yet another summoned by the enemy,” Alisaie observed. Great. Another long conflict to resolve.

“Kupo…” Mog trailed. “You might be right. But, but…!”

He straightened himself up.

“I can’t sense any brilliance or larvae around!”

“How weird…” said a red haired woman I hadn’t noticed. She was dressed like a cultural dancer of some sort. “That doesn’t usually happen, does it?”

“I don’t know, kupo… Maybe something’s wrong with my pompom?”

“What do you think?” Locke asked Setzer.

_If there’s a Locke, then there must also be a Keye…_

“This may be a dangerous gamble,” Setzer answered, “but we can’t just leave it like this.”

_What happened here for you all to dislike it so much?_

_I could ask Terra, but… I don’t want to bring up bad memories…_

“Please, Mog,” Speaking of Terra… “let us pass through here.”

“We might just find some treasure, too!” Locke chimed in.

“If you believe it worth the risk,” Alisaie said, “I shall follow. This is an unknown world, after all.”

“Hey, Prince,” Setzer got Noct’s attention. “If you’ve got something to say, now’s the time.”

“I’ve got nothing,” Noctis said casually. “I’ll leave it up to you guys.”

I nodded in agreement and glanced at Terra, who looked a bit wary.

“...Wait. ‘Prince?’ I don’t remember telling you guys that.”

_Oops… That might be on me…_

Setzer laughed, somewhat maliciously. “I thought you were just some spoiled kid, but it turns out you really are a prince.”

_Oh. He was joking._

“We’re not on vacation, so stop staring. There’s no one to babysit you here.”

_The fuck is **his** problem?!_

I gave him my best glare.

“Or your ‘Princess’ there.”

“I’m not a princess,” I ground out. “And if you’ve got a problem with Noctis, it’s not _his_ fault he was born royalty.”

“Leave her out of it,” Noctis said exasperatedly. “And I’m not staring! …We can leave if we’re in the way, though.”

I reluctantly agreed.

“Don’t go, kupo!” Mog pleaded. “We’ve got strength in numbers! It doesn’t matter if you're highborn or a high roller! We can all work together!”

“You know what else happens in numbers, Mog?” I asked lowly so only he and Noct (and maybe Terra) could hear. _“Massacres.”_

Mog audibly gulped.

“Just call him a gambler,” Locke said. “Anyway, I’m with you, Mog.”

“Yes!” Terra said. “I agree!”

“There’s no need to be so anxious.”

_Easy for you to say…_

“It’s hard to keep our eyes on the prize if we’re all worked up like this.”

_Seriously, what does Setzer have against Noct? I know Noct can be standoffish, but… he’s really nice once you get to know him!!_

“Let’s take a moment to calm ourselves before moving forward,” Alisaie suggested. I liked already. Setzer turned to look at her.

“Yet another noble, I suspect…” he mumbled. I kept myself from steaming and played with my jacket zipper. His gaze fell back to Noctis. “My apologies. I had no intention of prying.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Noct brushed it off. “Let’s just find some good treasure and get out of here.”

I sighed as we followed Mog and Terra as they began to walk. “Really? Do we have to?”

“C’mon, it’ll be fun!”

“Just wait: I bet there’ll be a royal tomb _here,_ too!”

“Man, that’d be wild!”

We ended up splitting up from the group a while later. Prompto was off hanging out with some of his new friends, so that left me and Noct. We left mostly because I was getting overheated and needed to find someplace to cool down. Unfortunately, there wasn’t any water we could find, so we opted to find some good shade instead. I was vaguely aware of a new ally we’d picked up, but he wasn’t anyone we knew. So, we found a nice spot to rest in another square. I plopped down against the wall of one of the buildings as Noct contemplated using his phone.

“Think we’ll get any signal out here?” he asked.

“You literally interrupted me earlier!” I said, crossing my arms. Vayne’s lips had been… so close to mine. If Noct had waited just a _second_ longer…

“Right, sorry. I meant, like… Could we contact someone who’s still on Eos?”

“No idea. Haven’t tried it yet. I didn’t think it’d be possible.”

“I wonder if I could make a call…”

I pulled my knees up to hug and rested my head on them.

“Then again, I’d have nothing to say. We don’t even know how to get back…”

I hummed sadly. Ignis and Gladio must be worried sick…

“We could let them know we’re okay,” I suggested. “And safe.”

“Is this a bad time?” a new voice joined the party. I glanced up to see a brown haired young man wearing blue and black standing behind Noctis. I was too tired to stand, but thankfully, Noct knew how to handle this.

“Not at all,” he said calmly. “Are you taking a break, too? Why don’t we sit there?”

He meant where I was sitting, of course. I waved. Our new friend nodded at me amicably.

“Actually, I wanted to go hunting,” he said. “But I couldn’t find any big prey here in town… Or is it just this world doesn’t have anything to hunt?”

“Wouldn’t doubt it…” I muttered. “No one actually lives here but the gods.”

“Don’t listen to her,” Noctis said, shrugging me off. “We’ve even hunted behemoth before. She wasn’t there.”

“Behemoth?!” New Friend stepped back in shock. _“You_ can eat those?!”

“You eat them in your world?”

“In my time, people did. But it might be different for Serah and the others. The monsters didn’t look very edible there, though.”

“Yeah, I guess there weren’t many of those.” Noctis rubbed at his neck.

“You dress like Lightning and the others, so I thought you might be from their time.”

_‘Their’ time? And what time does that make **you** from?_

“Sorry if I was wrong. Are you a hunter, too?”

“Yeah, it’s a part-time-” Noct stopped. “Well, a way to make money.”

“You can just say it’s a part-time job,” I muttered. He ignored me.

“And a way to gather ingredients for dinner.”

My stomach threatened to rumble at the thought of Ignis’ cooking.

“Same here,” New Friend said. It seemed he and Noct had some things in common.

“But I specialize in hunting,” Noctis clarified. A few seconds passed. “Someone else did the cooking.”

“When I said adamantoise was delicious, Serah looked so surprised. So I think I understand.”

“You manage to catch one of those turtles? Impressive.”

_“...Turtles?”_ I cut in. “That’s so mean! Why would you kill and eat an innocent turtle?”

“These ones are huge. Like, _mountain-sized_ huge. Not very safe for people.”

“Noctis, your world is terrifying.”

“Have you ever tried it?” New Friend asked us. “If not, let’s snag one here.”

Noctis seemed a bit put off. “Seriously?”

“Yeah. Let’s give it a try next time. Your name is Noctis, right? I think you can do it.”

“Alright. If you’re sure. What was your name again?”

“Noel. Noel Kreiss.”

My heart got shot by a tiny, metaphorical arrow. His name reminded me of Christmas… Would I ever get to celebrate Christmas again…?

_Great. One person joins in and you’re depressed again. Why does this keep happening? One moment I’m happy, the next, I’m sad._

“Hey, _______, you comin’?” I glanced up to see Noctis waiting for me. I stood slowly and tied my jacket around my waist. “Noel, this is _______. She technically came here from my world, but she’s actually from a different one.”

“Nice to meet you, _______.”

“Hi,” I said awkwardly. “As for eating a turtle, I’ll pass but thanks.”

I followed them out of the square.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re moving on into Act 2, Chapter 5~


	62. From All Walks Of Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompto and Reader stalk Noctis :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey sorry this one’s late. I’ve been having a lil trouble with filling in the moments between plots points :/ If anyone has suggestions for more shenanigans with Noct, Prom, and Read, lemme know and I’ll see what I can do!

I copped out of hunting with Noel and Noctis. Hunting could be pretty fun when all five of us were there (that is, me, Noct, and our friends), but without Gladio and Ignis, it didn’t feel like it would be as productive. Sure, we could get some food to cook but if Ignis wasn’t there, who would cook it? And if everyone but Gladio was here, it’d still feel weird as we’d be one person short (again). So instead, I thought I’d find Prompto and/or go explore the empty city, not alone for once.

My feet carried me along the painted stone streets. The desert sun beat down on me like Hephaestus at his forge. I had forgone my jacket a while ago. Still, that didn’t help much. I tried my best to ignore the sweltering heat and think. After hearing what Terra and her friends had said about this place, a small, red flag waved in my head. On the outside, the sandy walls and pretty patterns along the streets made for a beautiful setting. Deep down, however, I felt like there was something there, something missing. What had happened here that they didn’t want to talk about? Should I ask Terra?

I passed several groups on my search for Prompto. They seemed either thoughtful or playful, training and conversing freely. As I observed them, I felt a slight tug. It wasn’t one the kind I sometimes felt around Noctis. This wasn’t spiritual. It felt like someone had somehow wrapped a hand around the magic flowing through my veins and was trying to tug on it like Remy the rat from Ratatouille.

_Fuck, not again. Not today, thanks._

I was _not_ going to be taking hostage again.

_Ask Mog to call Vayne. He can help!_

_I don’t want to bother him, especially if it’s just a fleeting feeling. How do I even know that’s a person or magical being? Maybe this world is just getting to me…_

_Yeah, that would make sense. And I’m tired of being rescued all the time… Can I please get a break?_

I continued down the street, turning into a little courtyard. At the end, I could see Prompto hanging around with a handful of people. I recognized Vaan and Penelo, and Prompto, obviously, but not anyone else. At the sight of the two Ivaliceans, I slowed down. Arguing over my relationship with Vayne did not seem appealing at the moment. My feet came to a hesitant amble, trying to pretend like I was leisurely strolling. I stared up at the sky and the tops of the walls around us, inching towards Prompto.

The clashing sounds of combat broke my careful concentration. It was a tad hard to hear, but the beginning had been very loud. The noise of metal on metal and gunfire could be heard in the next street down. I would’ve gone to investigate but the heat was unbearable. I already felt sluggish. Besides, there were plenty more people to take care of whatever was going on. Maybe some of them were training and there wasn’t any real emergency.

A roaring _clang!_ shuddered through the air, right into my ears. I shivered at how loud it was.

_You’d think they’d tone it down, but no._

The tugging from before started up again but worse. Something invisible yanked me forward. The faint noise of someone calling for help resounded in my mind. No one had actually spoken, and yet I could hear them.

_‘Kupo!’_

_Is that… Mog?_

_Oh shit **this** is what being called feels like!_

_Ugh, fine. I’ll go. Someone might be hurt._

I power walked my way to wherever the tugging led. My brain cursed the sun and its stupid, scorching rays. Did this world have an ozone layer? It didn’t _feel_ like it did. It was so hot that in some places my vision swam. I was never visiting another desert. Ever.

“_______!”

I begrudgingly glanced up. A worried Terra gestured for me to hurry. She was standing with a few of her friends in another square identical to all the others. Dark Manikins lay broken and beaten on the tiles, though there air around them set the hair on my arms on point. Something was off.

“What’s up?” I asked. “And… what’s with those guys?”

“We found them already hurt,” Terra explained. “In order to collect brilliance, we have to fight them, but…”

“They were already badly beaten. You think I can heal them?”

“That’s what I was going to ask.”

“Kupo!” Mog spun around in his place at seeing me approach. “We have a healer! Quick!”

I lifted my dominant hand. It glowed a faint turquoise.

“No,” said one of the Dark Manikins. It spoke for them all. “We cannot… be healed… There is not much time left.”

“Bullshit if I’ve ever heard it,” I muttered, stepping forward. A beautiful blonde woman raised her hand and told me to stop. The Manikin continued its speech.

“We were captured by Kefka and put into a medium meant to create something.”

_Kefka? The crazy clown guy? I can’t stand that guy._

“He called it the Blackened Will.”

“The Blackened Will…?” Terra questioned. “Isn’t that what possessed Mog before?”

My skin began to crawl as shivers and goosebumps shot up and down my body. I did not have pleasant memories concerning that monstrosity.

“Kupo?!” Mog backed up in shock. “But the Blackened Will takes time to be born, kupo!”

_S u s p i c i o u s._

“...Indeed,” said the Dark Manikin. “In order for any of us to become its incubator, a certain aptitude was necessary.”

_FUCK. I swear if ANOTHER villain comes after me, I’m begging Materia - no, I’m **DEMANDING** Materia let me fucking **leave.**_

“But we weren’t suitable… We couldn’t propagate the Blackened Will. But Celes and Terra from the World of Darkness…”

“Their dark manikins are still prisoners?!” Locke finished.

“Yes. They were implanted with the Blackened Will and it continued to absorb their magic. In time they will give birth to evil…”

I stepped back, continuing to shiver. There was no way I was going anywhere near that thing. With the way my magic was connected to my soul, it could very well kill me _and/or_ become insanely powerful by generating energy from my near limitless soul power.

_I need to find Noctis…_

As I worried in place, the Dark Manikins began to emit a mist almost similar to the ones daemons gave off. It was much more purple, though. We all watched as it consumed them and they faded away into nothing. A moment of silence passed by.

“...It looks like Kefka was connected to this town after all,” Terra said quietly.

“Then there’s a good reason there’s no brilliance here, kupo…” Mog said solemnly. “If Kefka is incubating a Blackened Will, it takes an enormous amount of energy, kupo.”

I shuddered at the memory of the one inside Mog desperately latching onto me in the Dimensional Rift.

“So he took the brilliance to use as material?” Pretty Blonde Lady asked.

“Unforgivable!” That was Edgar. He’d been the one talking to the Dark Manikin, who had his same likeness. “He’s violating the existence of others!”

“Where is Kefka?” Locke asked. “Can you locate him?”

“I’m afraid I can’t sense him right now, kupo…” Mog answered. “But if he needs the brilliance here, I can’t imagine he’s too far, kupo.”

_I need to keep an eye out. Or maybe two. Or three._

 

“Hey, Prom, have you seen Noct anywhere?”

I had found my way back to the square he and his new friends were hanging out in. My body was ready to cave under the heat of the desert but I promised I’d take care of myself. Potentially getting captured by Kefka was the exact opposite of that.

“Noct?” Prompto echoed. “Uhh… No, actually. Why? Is everything okay?”

I glanced awkwardly at Vaan, Penelo, and the others surrounding him in succession. Should I tell them all what I’d heard? Or just Prompto?

_They should know, too. The more everyone’s informed, the better._

“So, uh, we got a problem…” I said, attempting to lift my voice so the other people could hear me.

“Well, what is it?” Vaan asked. I sucked in a deep breath.

“Kekfa.” I let it sit. There wasn’t really a reason to elaborate immediately. Kefka on his own was a problem in general.

“Who?” Prompto asked. Oh! Right, he didn’t know.

“One of Spiritus’ warriors,” Vaan explained. “From Terra’s world, right?”

I nodded. “Remember the clown guy I told you about?”

“Oooh, that guy,” Prompto stretched. “The, uh, insane one?”

“Insane doesn’t even begin to cover it. But basically…”

I relayed the short but informative scene I had witnessed.

“And Terra told me this place we’re in is basically the big imperial city where he's from. So that’s why it’s here. They’re trying to figure out where he is.”

“Oh,” Prompto said, cheerful mood slowly diminishing. “Well, that’s not good.”

“I’ll go see if they need help!” Vaan volunteered determinedly. He started up from his place along the back wall of the square.

“And do what, exactly?” Penelo asked him as she followed. Prompto and I watched as they bickered along their way to find Terra and her friends.

“They’re not the only ones who’re used to the desert!”

Prompto laughed lightheartedly despite the news I’d told him. “You guys have really made some good friends here, huh?”

I grinned. “Yeah, I guess. Ashe and I might not see eye to eye, but Vaan’s getting better.”

My smile faltered.

“But seriously, we need to find Noct. I know Kefka already has test subjects to use but I don’t want to take any chances of getting kidnapped again.”

“Me neither, and I wasn’t even there the first time!”

“Let us hope it is also the last.”

Finding Noctis took longer than expected. First, everything around us looked the same and we accidentally kept going in circles. Second, if we asked anyone if they’d seen him, they usually said no. If they said yes, however, it was a while ago and they could only point us in a vague direction. Third, it turned out Kefka wasn’t the only menace to deal with. Ultimecia was back, Rinoa told me. Squall had dealt with her directly. She had been the one talking to Noel. I hadn’t even known Noel was hearing voices.

“Did that not… bother anyone?” I asked as we continued the search for Noct. “Like, seriously, some new guy tells you he’s hearing things and you _don’t_ automatically think it’s a psychological issue instead of a supernatural entity?”

“Maybe it’s something they’ve already dealt with,” Prompto suggested. “I’m guessing not _too_ many worlds think of schizophrenia as a mental illness.”

“Ah, yes, because they’re possessed by demons. But auditory hallucinations are a thing, too, right? Did no one think to get him help?”

“Help from who?” said a voice I knew well by now. “I don’t think there are any licensed psychologists here. Like, at all.”

“Noctis, there you are…!”

“Lookin’ for me?”

My shoulders relaxed at the sight of my friend-turned-brother standing in the wake of towering buildings that stretched up higher than the clouds. His all black clothing stuck out like a sore thumb among the sandy colors of everything else.

“Did you hear about Kefka?” Prompto asked. “I mean, I haven’t seen him yet, but…”

“Yeah, I heard,” Noct said sharply. “I was looking for you guys, too. Can’t be too careful. Neither of you are getting experimented on on my watch.”

Prompto stepped back. “You think he’d take _me?”_

“I think he’d use anyone, to be honest. With a mind out of whack like that… And one of you has powerful magic while the other has optimism for days. Who knows? Maybe the Blackened Will would like either of those?”

He was half teasing but I could hear the worry underneath his words. He’d almost lost me. He couldn’t lose me again, or Prompto. God forbid he lost both of us.

_Man, he’d completely snap if we both got kidnapped and manipulated._

“Stay close, alright?” he said casually. “And if I’m not around… stay close to each other.”

Prompto and I nodded in tandem. Then I said, “Same for you two.”

“And you,” Prompto completed the circle. “I just got here and I _really_ don’t want to be by myself. Like, be the only one from Eos, I mean.”

“I getcha,” Noct said lightly. Though… That was exactly what he felt before we had our reunion.

“Hey, Noctis!” called another, different voice. We turned to see Locke leading Squall and Noel our way. “And ________ and Prompto!”

“Hey,” Noct said smoothly. “What’s up?”

“Squall, Noel, and I are takin’ a break. Wanna join us?”

Noctis glanced at me and Prompto. “All three of us, or…?”

“Actually, I was thinking just you, me and these guys.”

_...He’s up to something. I can feel it._

“Oh, uh…” Noctis switched to awkward mode. “Weeell…”

“You can go on ahead, Noct!” Prompto said, not quite getting the hidden hint that I was. “______ and I can stick together! Like you said.”

“...Are you sure? Didn’t you spend a bunch of time trying to find me?”

“Just to make sure you knew what was going on,” I told him. I, myself, was forming a plan. Hopefully Prompto could play along. “I’ve Prompto. I’ll be fine.”

“...I don’t know…”

“I think they’ll be alright,” Noel assured Noctis. “The others aren’t too far. If something happens, I’m sure they’ll be able to help.”

Noctis thought it over. “I… guess, as long as we don’t go _too_ far…”

“Don’t worry about us!” Prompto said as Noctis left with them, both worried and curious. “We’ll be chillin’ with our new friends!”

And with that, group by group, everyone entered the towers. Once Noctis was a little ways away, I began to go after him.

“Uh, _______, wait, where are you going?”

I glanced back at Prompto. “I’m following Noctis.”

He was quick to catch up to me. “...Why? I thought we said we’d stick together.”

“We are! But… I have a feeling they’re up to something. And the only way to find out if they’re up to something is if we get up to something as well.”

“...Uh, okay. Are you sure we should, like _stalk_ them?”

“Think of as a super secret spy mission. Be quiet. Don’t let them see you!”

“Oh! You got it.” His voice lowered to a whisper. “Mission: Impossible is a go.”

I gave him a very confused look. “Where did you hear that?”

“Hear what?”

“Mission: Impossible?”

“Nowhere! I made it up! Why?”

My heart sank. “...No reason. Come on.”

The tower Kefka was hiding in was much different than the city below. The light sandstone floor was cut into by an intricate blue marble pattern. Along the slope leading up was a channel of some misty sort of energy. When I tapped into my magic to fight a few monsters along the way, I found it was much easier to use stronger bursts of power.

_Is this that Mist stuff Vayne was telling me about? Does it exist in other worlds, too? Is it dangerous? Maybe I should ask someone from Ivalice…_

Before I could make the next turn, a hand halted me abruptly. “Hey, they’ve stopped!”

Prompto was peering around the edge of the next ‘flight’ - it was all one slope leading up but thinking of it as a staircase without stairs made more sense. I shushed Prompto before anyone heard us.

“...’m sorry if you feel rushed,” Locke was saying. “Treasure hunters should be free. I’m sure you understand if you’re really a hunter.”

“I hunted for food,” Noel explained to him. “Things like treasure didn’t exist anymore.”

“What’s he mean?” Prompto whispered.

“I think he’s from, like, a post-apocalyptic world or something,” I answered quietly.

“Oh cool!”

_Not exactly…_

“...Oh, right, sorry.”

“You’re good.”

“I studied the sword so I could save them,” Noel spoke of his loved ones, “but in the end… it was useless…”

_...I guess I kinda know how that feels…_

“You really think so?” Locke asked him. “Lightning told me Serah said you’re very reliable.”

“Serah was my partner,” Noel clarified. He paused, now emotionally conflicted. “But here, she has Snow and Lightning, her family…”

“Do you think you’re alone, even in this world?”

“...I’m not used to being around so many people. Ever since I was born, I’ve been able to count the number of people in my village.”

“Man, I can’t even imagine…” Prompto muttered. “That would be so lonely…”

_...It hurts, huh… I get that our situations are very different, but… I guess I also know what it feels like to be the last one of a people now…_

My heart clenched at the thought.

_Don’t think about it._

“We are a pretty big party now…” Locke said. “Can’t be easy on Squall either.”

“Don’t bring me into this,” Squall grumbled.

_There are a lot of us now, though. I don’t know or even think I can guess how many…_

“...The friends I’ve made here remind me of my friends back home,” Locke said.

“You mean like Terra and Edgar?” Noel asked.

“From kings and former imperial soldiers… We had all kinds of allies from all walks of life. We had different reasons for fighting. I don’t know if I fully understood them even at the end.”

“Even still, you fought as one?”

“Of course. We’re all adults, and we all have a past. It’s good to surround yourself with all kinds. It doesn’t matter if your reasons for fighting aren’t the same. I think it’s important to treasure your bonds with friends and family while you’re young.”

_Maybe the real treasure was the friends we made along the way._

“Even if their way of thinking is different, you can still stand by each other’s sides and fight.”

Prompto gave me a playful yet knowing nudge. I giggled silently and gently elbowed him back.

“...I get what you’re saying,” Noctis spoke up.

_Our boy speaks!_

“You, too,” Locke said to him. “You might be uneasy not knowing many people here, but… Don’t hesitate to rely on us! We’ve done our growing up.”

“...Does he think Noct’s a kid or something?” I muttered. Prompto stifled a laugh.

“It’s not really that serious, but… thanks,” Noctis said.

“You’re a lot better off than when I was a kid!” Locke said teasingly but amazedly.

“...I am twenty, you know.”

“Woah, my bad!”

Prompto and I dissolved into giggles. I’m fairly certain Squall heard us as his head twitched in our direction but he said nothing.

“If there’s anything you need, let me know. I'll protect my friends with my life!”

...I liked this Locke guy already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In light of the new Opera Omnia Enhancement Campaign, I have decided to give you guys my player code so we can be friends, if you like!  
> My support character is Vayne (obviously) and I am dedicated to making him as OP as I possibly can :)
> 
> My ID: 207080921
> 
> Go nuts~


	63. Medica crepusculī

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is time Reader comes to terms with something she has been avidly avoiding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title: “Healer of twilight”
> 
> This chapter is brought to you by Eravanthia, who recently got me into FFXIV. Era, this one’s for you :D

“Oh, hey,” Noctis said, “didn’t realize you were so close by.”

Prompto and I had stopped our stalking of Noct a few minutes ago. Some of the gunmen had offered to train with Prompto and he had accepted, leaving me to stick by Noctis, who noticed me not long after.

“Just staying close,” I said. My gaze slipped to the side. “I don’t really… want to be alone. But I don’t really feel like talking either.”

“I getcha. I feel like that most days. But, uh, if Prompto and I aren’t around, just latch onto someone else.”

“Right. ...So, where did Locke and Noel go?”

“Right here,” said Noel, coming up behind Noctis. “You need something?”

I shook my head. “Just wondering.”

“Hey!” We looked to see Zidane, Prishe, and an oddly shaped knight called Steiner approaching us. Zidane spoke, “You guys finish that break yet?”

“Not really,” Noct said simply. “Just takin’ it easy.”

_But why? They weren’t plotting much while we were following them. What exactly is their objective?_

“So Locke is a treasure hunter,” Zidane said, “and Noel is a monster hunter. Yuffie is a self-proclaimed materia hunter…

_I’m sorry, a **what?**_

I had to cut my laughter off quickly.

“We’ve got all kinds of hunters,” Zidane finished. “It makes me think of the Festival of the Hunt back home…”

“What’s that?” Noel asked.

“It’s an event where the more you hunt, the more points you get. Vivi and Freya participated, too.”

_Wait, Vivi? Shy, soft spoken Vivi took part in a hunting festival?_

_Everyone’s got their hobbies and interests, I guess._

“Sounds awesome,” Noct said. Of course he’d like the sound of that.

“Is it true that you only ate monster meat, Sir Noel?” Steiner asked.

“Yeah,” Noel told us. “The ground was infertile, so you couldn’t grow anything. There weren’t any vegetables.”

Noctis’ and my eyes lit up.

“Even if there were, you couldn’t cultivate them. The techniques were long gone.”

“Sounds like a harsh future to live in…” Zidane said.

_That part sounds wonderful. Not sure about the rest of it._

“What a cruel life!” Steiner proclaimed. “I’d be happy to share some of my pickles with you.”

_...Well, I do like pickles…_

_He wasn’t offering to you, you idiot._

“Maybe it’s better not to start him off with those pickles…” Prishe commented.

“So you mean there were no veggies at all?” Noctis asked, trying to mask his eagerness.

“Absolutely none,” Noel said. “Even grass withered.”

_...Now **that** doesn’t sound good._

Noctis hummed, deep in thought. I thought along with him.

“What’s up with you two?” Prishe asked us. “Do you hate vegetables?”

As I nodded, Noct protested, “What?! I don’t remember telling you that!”

“Even if you didn’t,” Steiner said, “it’s clear on your face.”

“It’s not like I hate them…”

“Ignis would say otherwise,” I muttered. Noctis half-heartedly nudged me.

“No, I do hate them, but…”

“This is painful to watch,” Zidane mused, slightly concerned. “Vegetables are good for you health.”

I let out a low whine. “I know but we both have sensory issues.”

“And somehow,” Noctis said bitterly, “they found their way into the food I’d always eat.”

“That’s just Ignis.”

Steiner laughed. “You had an excellent chef!”

“...That’s Ignis.”

“Even without him around,” Prishe said, “you shouldn’t be so picky.”

Noctis and I exchanged a glance, uncomfortable with that thought.

“They look upset,” Zidane came to our rescue. “Don’t tease them so much, Prishe.”

“I heard that you like meat,” Noel said to us. “But I didn’t know you hated vegetables.”

“I definitely prefer my meals without them,” Noctis said. I nodded in tandem.

“Those two seem to get along great,” Prishe said, speaking of Noctis and Noel.

“I don’t get it,” Zidane said. “They seem like complete opposites.”

I giggled. “You haven’t seen him with Prompto yet!”

“People’s hearts a funny thing,” Prishe said. “I’m just happy that they can be friends!”

 

At the top of the tower lay a wasteland colored in a sickening dull, tannish gray. Lumps of organic material covered the ground, large piles of them resting along what little, disorganized paths there were. I didn’t like the smell, either. It wasn’t exactly bad, per se, but… It made my stomach feel slightly queasy. I wasn’t even sure what I was stepping on; the weird crunching sound reminded me of rock but at the same time, it felt almost soft under my feet.

“Hey, Noct,” I got his attention, “since Kefka already has test subjects, can I go off by myself to explore?”

It wasn’t the best idea, honestly. But being around so many people for such a long was getting to be pretty draining.

“...I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Noctis said. “Why? What happened to ‘stick together’?”

“...I’m just tired of socializing.”

“Right. I get that. Well, if you really have to… just stay in sight, alright? Don’t go too far. I don’t trust anything in this place.”

“That makes two of us.”

_And together, our dumbasses conjure up exactly two (2) brain cells._

_Ignis is going to blow a fucking gasket when we get back and tell him how much trouble we got into._

_God, don’t get me started on Gladio._

I shivered.

_I wonder if I could find a good place to nap until everyone’s done._

And thus my stupid excuse of an expedition began.

I did my best not to stray too far. I generally stayed close to the various groups that had formed, though on their outskirts rather than within. As we went along, I scoured high and low for a good rest stop. Absolutely nothing changed in the scenery and I was left feeling hot from the desert and tired from this never ending journey.

At one point, I did notice flickers of gray in the distance. It caught my eye as everything else was a weird mesh of every other color. A light gray would be easy to spot, especially when it wasn’t trying to be sneaky. And so, I found myself ambling towards no particular place, straying farther from the group, chasing nothing. The closer I got, the more scurrying I heard. Someone _was_ trying to hide from us. How Kefka hadn’t found them, I don’t know.

Humming a little tune to feign innocence, I snuck up to some of the lumps of odd matter. I crept around them, fully aware my humming my might scare whatever it was away. Finally, I peeked around the corner.

Dark manikins were standing there, hunched over. The same misty darkness from earlier wafted up from them. It was like if a person was becoming a daemon.

_Like you saw with Ardyn._

My song stopped in my throat as one of them lifted its head. Its eyes were empty, dull. It stared at me, somewhat angrily, before trying to step forward. The other few caught wind of me. Ithilcalad sparkled into my grasp. I raised my other hand, magic swirling around it.

“The pain…” the manikin whispered. “Make it… stop…”

I stepped back, unable to speak.

“Hurts…”

It lunged at me, jerkily. I stepped to the side just in time. Its friends decided to leap in, as well. Heart jumping in fear, I ran around them and thrust my arm back, letting ice and snow attempt to freeze them solid. Unfortunately, my control still wasn’t completely developed and all it did was slow them. I whipped around and let the blade of my sword freeze to a point. The closest manikin swung at me. I blocked it. It swung again. I blocked again. The others joined in. Magic and steel assaulted me from all sides. Gritting my teeth through the pain, I tried sweeping through them in a large circle. That managed to make some of them stumble back. I rushed the closest one, blade pointing straight at him. Before it could sink into him, he dodged and I fell forward.

I barely managed to catch myself as I let my balance pull me ahead. I ran again, this time trapping myself against the piles of organic matter. My eyes stared at it as I panicked. Never again would I wander alone. What was I going to do now?

...Wait.

I turned to see three people now backing me up. No wonder the manikins hadn’t gotten to mr yet. They were occupied! Well, might as well help.

I leaped in, slashing at the first one with wild abandon to let out the pent up adrenaline from being terrified. The second got a back full of icicles. The third was gone by the time I came back to my full senses. I leaned forward, hunched over to catch my breath.

“Well, well,” Y’shtola mused. “You certainly do have a knack for getting yourself into trouble.”

I froze for a second before straightening myself up and laughing nervously.

“Uh, oops?” I breathed. “Sorry… And thanks.”

“Your dear brother asked me to keep an eye on you,” my feline friend said. “And I think we’re both glad he did.”

I sighed loudly for longer than necessary. “I knew I should’ve taken Prompto with me…”

“I trust you’re not injured?”

I paused, feeling inwardly for anything seemingly permanent. With a blink I shook my head.

“Good. I shudder to think what Noctis would do if you were kidnapped again.”

I shuddered, too.

“And who might this lovely lady be?” said the man standing next to her. I had hardly registered the other two.

“Oh don’t bother,” Y'shtola teased. “Her heart is _rather taken_ with another man already.”

I stiffened instantly. “Th-that’s- that’s not-! I- We’re not-... Um-!”

“And _you_ shouldn’t bother denying it!”

My cheeks must’ve been bright red for the millionth time that day.

“Are you sure I wouldn’t be able to change your mind?” the man gave me a charming smile. Blink, blink.

“Yeah, no, I’m good,” I said, managing to keep the awkwardness from my voice. He seemed shocked.

“As I said,” Y’shtola said with a sly smile, “don’t even bother.”

And that’s how I was introduced to two of her friends, Thancred and Yda. They were kind enough to help me find the rest of the group. I had wandered farther away than I had intended. To be fair, everything on this floating slab of gray looked the same.

I was starting to feel sluggish again. This journey was wearing me out, thinning me down to what little strength I could I muster to continue. Yes, I slept quite a bit already, but they were quick bouts and nothing to get me to feeling one hundred percent.

“What _were_ you doing out here all by yourself?” Yda asked me.

“I’m also curious,” Y’shtola said, “seeing as the last time you wandered off, you almost got yourself _killed.”_

“Aha… Well…” I glanced away, wrist twisting to keep my nerves at bay. “Let’s just say this place doesn’t look like a good place for a nap.”

A few seconds passed before my friend sighed.

“Perhaps I should keep a count of how many of those you and your brother have taken.”

“And which of our friends _is_ this brother?” Thancred inquired.

“Noctis!” I declared. “He’s a dark boy, all in black, with black hair. But his soul-!”

I clapped my hands together.

“His soul is light.”

“You must be quite close.” Yda smiled. I tilted my head.

“Actually I’ve only known him for a month. We’re not actually related but… We just kinda clicked. Like we’ve known each other forever.”

_“There you are.”_ That wasn’t me. Just up ahead was yet another dark manikin. She looked just like me. _“I’ve been looking for you. Everywhere.”_

“________…?” Y’shtola’s puzzled tone flew right over my head.

“What do you want?” I asked flatly. “You gave me my brilliance already.”

“That was another me. I’m different.”

“Okay, well, good for you. Goodby-!”

She stalked over to us, stopped about seven feet away. No one said a word. Other Me watched me closely, glancing me over angrily.

“You okay?” I finally said. “Um, there’s no need to be angry-...”

“‘Angry’?” she mocked. A bitter laugh left her. “Angry doesn’t even _begin_ to cover it. You don’t have enough anger inside you, so this world gave it all to _me._ You have _any_ idea what this feels like? _Do you?!”_

My voice grew smaller. “Um… No…”

“He’s going to die, you know,” she hissed, shaking with rage. “He’s going to _die_ and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

I was shaking now, too. “Don’t.”

“Don’t _what?_ Don’t remind you of what you’ve been avoiding for a week? Don’t let you remember that _your_ fate goes hand in hand with his?”

_“No._ I _mean,_ don’t do this while there are other people around! It’s… I-...”

“You ‘don’t want to _bother them with it’?_ Yeah, I _know._ You think I care?”

“Well, you _are me,_ so-”

“Well, I _don’t!_ I don’t while _you_ are standing around goofing off and not trying to cherish what little time with him you have left! You think I care about that _at all?_ No, I don’t. _Not when you could very well deliver the killing blow-!”_

I jumped into a fighting stance, my sword flickering to my hands. My body burned with anger. It pooled in my chest, flowed into my arms, and reach all the way to my head.

_“How **dare** you think I’d do such a thing!”_ I managed to say in a whisper. I had to stop myself from crying as the threat of tears burned my eyes and throat. _“I would never, **ever** hurt Noctis like that!”_

“WELL, IT’S _POSSIBLE!”_

The dark mist rose from her, too. The sight caused me calm a bit. She looked rabid, ready for a fight I knew she couldn’t win. My ears picked up her heavy breathing. She was so close to snarling.

“I say we put the poor thing out of her misery,” Thancred suggested. I hadn’t noticed my new friends were just as irate at Other Me’s words.

“I suppose that makes four of us,” Y’shtola said fiercely. She raised her staff and held it in front of her. “_______, would you like the honors of delivering the first blow?”

I raised my hand, and I snapped. We were so high up in the sky that the usually flash of lightning was twice as short now. It hit Other Me dead on. The battle began. As I clashed with myself, the other three occupied themselves with the monsters that showed up as reinforcements.

“You’ll _never_ save him,” Other Me seethed. “And how you mope about, I hope you can’t even save _yourself!”_

With a loud growl, I shoved her back and swung _hard._ A blade lit up with flames lashed out and she blocked it just in time. I tried again. And again. Slash after slash, I pushed her back, ready to take her down and stop tormenting me. She only barely blocked each blow. Both of our hands were full trying to keep our swords still so magic was nowhere in sight. Or at least, not until Y'shtola was free to help me. A burst of flame flared up from underneath us, only harming the manikin, whose eyes widened. It was no longer one on one.

And then Other Me turned and ran. I braced myself to give chase only to have a hand rest itself on my shoulder.

“It would be best to conserve your strength,” Thancred said lowly. “I don’t believe she deserves our attention at the moment if all she wishes to do is cause torment.”

Ithilcalad dissipated into crystalline sparkles. I inhaled sharply, still shaking at her words…

_Because she was right._

There was nothing I could do about Noctis’ fate to save Eos and die for it. I had been adamantly avoiding even _thinking_ about it because of how much pain it caused me. Not only would it hurt to be reminded of losing one of the best people I’d ever known, but I’d also remember that there had been no conceivable reason for Earth to be destroyed. There was no reason for anything that had happened other than to contribute to my own demise. I was reminded that my only purpose on Eos was to _die._

A tear escaped. I could vaguely head Y’shtola trying to get my attention. My shoulder started shivering as I tried to calm myself. Then someone was shouting. I heard someone rushing over.

_Why…?_

The footsteps got closer and closer now.

_Why me? Why my home? What reason could there be for destroying it all?_

Voices danced around me, explaining what had happened. A hand wrapped around my arm.

_Why…_

_I don’t understand…_

I was pulled into a warm embrace as the person holding me told the others to find Noctis. As I gently shook, now cold and empty, whoever held me hushed me softly.

_“Did I not tell you I would be here when you need me?”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter started out going where I wanted it to, and then it didn’t. At the very least, I have a mini subplot for Act 2, Ch. 5!  
> Also I didn’t expect you-know-who to show up at the end either but here we are. Guess he got paranoid about leaving us on our own :P


	64. The Interdimensional Troubles of a King’s Adopted Witch Sister And Her Beloved Consul

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reader finally learns about dear Vayne...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final Fantasy XII spoilers!

 “How am I supposed to tell him…”

 The arms around me tightened. A choked sob left me.

 “How am I supposed to tell him we’re supposed to _die…?”_

 I was hushed softly, trembling pitifully, unknowing what to do.

 “Noctis does not _know_ of his fate?” Vayne’s rich voice met my ears like a song.

 “He’s never mentioned it. I… I wouldn’t be surprised if his dad didn’t tell him that either…”

 A gloved hand stroked my hair as I did my best to calm down from the tingly, rising panic attack forming in my chest. Y’shtola and her friends… If they hadn’t been there, I’d be slightly better but they just _had_ to witness every sentence.

 “They must… I don’t want them to think of me any differently.”

 “I’m sure they don’t.”

 “And- and- I just- I…”

 I sniffed and swallowed.

 “I’m so _tired_ of _crying…!”_

 “You have every reason to. In your circumstances, it would do you no good to hide your feelings away.”

 “But how do I…” I glanced to the left. “How do I _tell_ him?!”

 A hand lifted my chin. Pale green eyes locked with mine.

 “You will know when the time comes,” he said. “There is no need to rush whilst we are here, on another world. _Enjoy_ yourself, while you can. It would do you no good to dwell on the plans of the future if there is no perceivable way to change it in this moment.”

  _“All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”_

  _Thank you, Gandalf._

 Sniffing, I nodded sorrowfully. “It’s hard, though.”

 “I know. Death is not something to be taken lightly.”

 He glanced to the side.

 “Especially when one’s family is involved.”

 I blinked. Was he talking about his brothers?

 He looked back to me. “At the very least, you and Noctis have each other. I do not often place such value on overly person relationships, yet… Your bond is strong. When you return, you may very well be able to find an alternative to your supposedly decided fates.”

 I hummed lowly and thoughtfully.

 “Promise me one thing.”

 “Again?”

 “_______.”

 “...What is it?”

 His eyes dulled with an emotion I couldn’t place. It wasn’t a happy one. More haunted, if anything. Like a man who had seen and done terrible things and felt little remorse, though they were not entirely proud of their actions.

 “Give me your word that you will never war with each other,” Vayne said solemnly. I straightened up stiffly, and stared at him, puzzled and taken aback.

 “What?” I asked. “What- I- What makes you think we _would?”_

 “You both have a knack for getting yourselves into trouble, time and time again. ...I would hate to see something come between you.”

  _Why is he saying that?_

 “And after that spar you had with him, there is no telling who would emerge the victor.”

 Fear stirred in my chest. Why would he even _think_ of that?

  _...Is this… what happened to him? What happened to his family? How did his brothers die? Did-... Did he…?_

_No. There’s no way._

 “I’m…” My foot moved back. “Vayne, you’re scaring me. Noctis and I wouldn’t… Why…?”

 He stepped forward, leaving nigh an inch between us.

 “I don’t… What?”

  _War with each other?_

 “Is this… coming from…”

  _Don’t ask him, don’t ask him, don’t ask him-_

 “-experience…?”

  _You_ **_fucking_ ** _idiot._

 He closed his eyes and sighed quietly. “Mayhaps. But I would be loathe to see you tear each other apart because of an asinine prophecy.”

 “Vayne…?”

 He opened his eyes.

 “...What aren’t you telling me? Why… Why would you think Noctis and I would ever… We _couldn’t.”_

 “It is very much possible, particularly in such stressful circumstances as you find yourselves.”

 “But…” I snapped out of it and shook my head. “No. We wouldn’t. I _won’t_ let that happen. And neither would Noct.”

 A glimpse of grief flashed through his eyes before he turned and stepped away. He took another few steps as he spoke. “You are much like my younger brother. Speaking of peace, and keeping it… And yet it was you that told me that if you want peace, prepare for war.”

 “But that’s not _always_ the answer!” I tilted my head. “Please just tell me why you even _thought_ to ask me to promise that.”

 His arms folded behind his back. “You would not understand.”

 “Then help me to…”

 He bowed his head. “You would think me a monster.”

 “It’s not like you committed genocide… ...Right…?”

 “Hmm…” He chuckled darkly. “I suppose not, though it could well be debated.”

 I breathed a sigh of relief.

 “However…”

 I sucked that sigh back in.

 “Were I to tell you who I really am, you would want nothing more to do with me. I’d rather not have that.”

 I walked closer to him. “Can I please be the one to decide that?”

 He was silent. I continued moving around him until we were face to face.

 “Are you as bad as Sauron?” It sounded ridiculous, but… Sauron did horrible things. “Melkor?”

 “So you know the Silmarillion as well.”

 “Please just tell me so we can get this over with and go back to whatever we were before.”

 He raised his gaze to me. A second passed before he moved forward, cupping my face with both hands. His gloves were soft.

 “You are too trusting,” he said quietly.

 “Vayne, I once liked a character that destroyed an entire dimension and everyone in it and felt no remorse,” I said flatly. “Probably reveled in it, too, and wreaked havoc across the entire multiverse. And yes, technically he was fictional, but still.”

 As I spoke, he regarded me seriously.

 “And… people can always change, right? If you want to.”

 “My hands,” he told me, “are stained with blood. There is little point in staying them now.”

 I kept my deadpan expression. “Yes, I’ve heard. Just wash them off! It’s not hard. Do you know how many times I’ve had to wash blood off my hands? _Every month.”_

 He looked confused.

 “Ah- nevermind; women’s joke. But… Really. I can handle it. You know I’m tougher than I look. And I’ve been meaning to ask you anyway. Ashe has been giving me a lot of shit for hanging around with you.”

 Realizing I wouldn’t let it go, he began his long explanation. He told me lots of things. He was quiet, serious, ready for me to turn tail and ditch him. Or slap him. Which I wanted to do. Several times. Some things he told me I could understand. Some things were unforgivable. And some things… Some things were…

 “What kind of father tells his own son to _kill his own brothers?”_ I hissed. “What sort of _John Winchester_ **_bullshit_ ** is that?!”

 “It has long since passed.”

 “That’s _no excuse!_ No _wonder_ you’re so caught up in the whole ‘war for peace’ thing! It’s the only thing you’ve ever been taught!”

 “_______.”

 “As for the refugees, I can’t forgive that. That’s just- I can’t- Why? What was the point? And as for the Occurria, good on you for what you did but-”

 I gave him a shove. He looked slightly offended.

 “Did you seriously have to go all power crazy?! That sounds nothing like you at all! No wonder Vaan and his friends hate that nethicite stuff! It drove you insane!”

 “________.”

 “And why the hell didn’t you listen to your brother?! He sounds like a damn smart kid!”

 “________.”

 “What?!”

 “Are you finished?”

 I crossed my arms and huffed. “...Yes.”

 “Good. Well. I suppose I can rule out you wanting absolutely nothing to do with me.”

 I let myself relax a little. “I told you I could never hate you.”

 Tears burned my eyes.

 “But why didn’t you tell me you’re technically dead?”

 It hurt to think about. It was like someone had cut into my chest and tried to tear my heart out. My heartbroken look broke his own heart. I gazed up at him with sad puppy eyes brimming with tears and love. All I wanted was to be with him for as long as I could… And it would seem that there was a possibility I couldn’t even have _that._

 “I did not wish to hurt you more,” Vayne said softly. He stepped forward to bring me closer to him, hands respectfully at my waist. “You have lost enough.”

 “I would have preferred honesty…”

 “In my defense, you never asked.”

 I glanced away. “But it’s not like I could loathe you. I don’t share the same experiences as Vaan and his friends. My views are pretty subjective and you seem- no, you’re… I _know_ you’re a good man deep down.”

 A smileless laugh left him. “Those of House Solidor are taught to put the needs of others before their own. It would seem I lost sight of that in the end. My brother is proof enough that I at least mangled the meaning to fit my own agenda.”

 “Vayne, I… I’m not going to stop liking you just because you’ve got a rocky moral compass and rough past.”

 Another half-hearted chuckle graced my ears.

 “Believe it or not, I…” I looked at his chest, unable to meet his eyes. “I wouldn’t have you any other way…”

 He inhaled deeply. “________… That is…”

 “Don’t. Don’t you dare push me away!” My own clapped to his neck and he flinched. “You promised you’ll always be here for me!”

 “...That I did.”

 “And even if you’ve done so much bad, no one can say your heart wasn’t in the right place. You’re not a villain. Just an antagonist.”

 

 Vayne walked me back to where Y’shtola was now speaking to Noctis. I prayed to whatever gods were listening that she didn’t tell him exactly what my dark manikin had said. When we neared them, I slowed down. My heart was fluttering nervously at what might happen now. Hopefully I wouldn’t need to tell Noctis about our fates early. When I came to an almost stop, Vayne placed his hand on my back and gently nudged me forward.

 “...rather disturbing things,” Y’shtola was saying as we joined them. “I’m not sure it is my place to tell you exactly what, but she was very upset afterward.”

 “I do hope we aren’t interrupting,” Vayne cut in. I couldn’t bring myself to speak. “All is well.”

 “_______…” Noctis came forward. “You okay?”

 I nodded, subconsciously reaching for his hand. He hesitantly gave it and squeezed back when I did so first.

 “Can’t talk?”

 I nodded again.

 “Alright.” He glanced at Vayne. “Thanks again.”

 “It is of no consequence,” Vayne said amenably. “I admit I’ve been overly concerned after the Emperor’s little stunt. When I heard Kefka was planning something, I came immediately. I am thankful she was not even considered as a test subject.”

 “Who told you?”

 “Ultimecia. ...Though I still struggle to understand why she specifically mentioned _______ 's name…”

 “Well, for once she has done us a small service,” Y’shtola said. “Though that by no means makes up for the rest of the atrocities she has committed, be it here or elsewhere.”

 “They actually found him,” Noctis said. “Locke, Noel, and I were going to catch up, but I can stay back here with you, if you want.”

 I shook my head. “I’m okay…”

 “It would be wise to keep _______ away from that abominable man,” Vayne fumed. “If he could even be _considered_ a man.”

 “So, you stayin’ or…?” Noct asked, shifting his weight. Vayne thought it over. It may very well be that they would call him in the case that the Blackened Will _was_ spawned.

 “If the others will have me.”

 “Good. Keep an eye on _______.”

 I hummed resignedly. Y’shtola eyed me as our small group began its walk towards Kefka’s “nursery,” where the Blackened Will was being birthed. I dropped back a few steps to answer the unspoken question she asked. We walked side by side, Vayne glancing back at me to make sure I wasn’t taking a detour.

 “I trust you are well?” she asked.

 “Mmhm,” I hummed with a nod. “Just trying to block it from memory.”

 The next few steps were taken in silence. The air around us tensed with foreboding. I braced myself for whatever else she’d say next

 “_______…” she said slowly. “I know this is a sore subject, and I’d hate to pour salt in the wound, but… Does Noctis know of your shared destiny?”

 My feet faltered and I nearly stopped completely. “W-what? What do you mean? What- What destiny?”

 She sent me a look that told me not to deny the issue. “You know well what I mean. We could all hear what that puppet was saying.”

 I froze, coming to a halt. Up ahead, Vayne noticed and stopped as well, but he did not move to see what was going on. Panic lit up every part of me, making my arms feel barely tingly, almost numb.

 “We will, of course, keep it secret, however… I merely wished to make sure you’re alright.”

 “I…” I swallowed thickly. In a higher voice, I said, “I’m fine…!”

 Y’shtola did not look amused. She crossed her arms. “________. If you were ‘fine,’ that battle would have gone _much_ differently.”

 My gaze moved to the side. I didn't know what to say. I didn’t know what to _do._ My whole being stood there, stiff, with its mouth opening and closing repeatedly. I clamped it shut and my line of sight fell to the ground.

 “You needn’t tell me everything,” Y’shtola murmured. “But I thought I would make sure you knew that _we_ know.”

 Footsteps from the front came walking back. Armored legs and feet came into view. I only bothered to glance up.

 “I trust everything is well?” Vayne said, eyes narrowing in suspicion. Y’shtola looked at me.

 “I am not entirely sure,” she told him. “Perhaps I should not have brought up what I did.”

 “I’m okay,” I croaked. “It, um… It’s… Thanks for… caring…”

 She gave me a deep nod and let Vayne lead me away.

 

 Approaching Kefka was the easy part, surprisingly. The Blackened Will was right begin him, looking as monstrous as ever. Its tall body stretched up to the sky, two bony wing-like limbs protruding from its back. It didn’t possess hands or distinguishable feet, but on both sides of its torso, there were four long, ribbonesque tentacles that ended in what reminded me of a bow. What could be counted as the “head” was a circular pattern of thin red lines and dots. As Terra, Noctis, Locke, and Celes moved forward, I hung back, clinging to Vayne once again.

 The amount of _power_ this thing possessed was practically _tangible._ I fought hard against eyes drooping as one its ribbon arms flexed and twitched in my direction. It felt like the breath was sapped right out of me. My grip on Vayne’s arm tightened and I whimpered.

  _So sleepy…_

 We could hear Kefka talking to himself as we finally reached him.

 “...different from those plain gorgers,” he was saying. “Dimensions it munches on’ll be the energy to get to other worlds!”

 Vayne bristled. I hugged his arm a little tighter, perhaps too tightly because he shook me off. I elected to hug myself. It was getting a bit chilly this high up. We were level with the clouds.

 “It’s waaaaay better than that sorry, moogle-sucking excuse for a parasite!”

 Kefka spun around.

 “Don’t you think?”

 “Kefka!” Terra accused.

 “I don’t have words for you anymore,” Locke spat. “We came here to defeat you!”

 “Have a cigar!” Kefka said lightly. “A birth is a joyous occasion! And it’s all thanks to those wonderful magitek mamas!”

 In my strength-sapping sleepiness, I felt frustration being kindled.

 “Even as empty dolls, they were still able to give birth to something this _magnifico!”_

 “What’re you?” I muttered. “Italian?”

 “Because I stuffed those hollow noggins of theirs with the darkest of dark emotions!”

 Well, that explained my dark manikin.

 “This guy is just the worst of all worlds,” Noel said, rightly so.

 “He has nothing but thoughts of destruction in his head,” Celes told him. “You don’t need to sympathize with him.”

 “You don’t need to tell me twice,” Noctis agreed.

 “I get it,” Noel said. “I know which side I stand on.”

 “What’s this?” Kefka cut in. “Were you thinking to bully my bouncing baby Blackened Wilbur?”

 “Seriously…?” I muttered. Vayne exhaled in annoyance.

 “Well sucks to be you! I also had my own little buff-fest this time!”

 The dark, cloudy mist we had seen countless times before wafted up from Kefka’s body. Had we been on Eos, I would’ve thought he was turning into a daemon.

 “I went ahead and stuffed all the brilliance, magic, will, et cetera I gathered for my little bundle of joy into myself, too!”

 He readied an attack. As it powered up and blasted towards us, Noel dashed forward to intercept it. He stayed in a defensive position, flinching.

 “Are you okay?” Noctis asked him.

 “I may have been too rash,” Noel grunted, “but look!”

 Kefka floated to the ground, where he knelt.

 “You worms are always, always, _always_ getting in my way…!” he growled. He stood up, and a small horde of dark manikins joined him. Mine was nowhere to be found.

 “Again?!” Noct exclaimed.

  _Damn there are a lot of these…_

 “Dammit, he’s not messing around anymore!” Locke said. “Are you guys ready?”

 “I can go anytime!” Noctis said determinedly. “I won’t let him have his way.”

 “Same,” Noel said. “I won’t forgive anyone who tries to take the future away from others.”

 “Perfect,” Locke said. “I won’t stand by and let this clown go free. Let’s get him!”

  _So that’s what they were doing. Noctis always does better when he’s more relaxed. Clever boyyos._

 I did my best to spring into action, but… The ground wobbled underneath me. A shortness of breath found its way to my lungs and my head spun.

 “Mr. Stark, I don’t feel so good…” I mumbled, stumbling over my head. “Oh God…”

 My stomach flipped and turned inside out. The nauseous feeling reached my throat. I fought to keep down whatever food was left inside me.

 “_______…?” Vayne’s voice was a million miles away. He glanced from me to the Blackened Will and back repeatedly. “Damn…”

 Something shiny appeared in his hand.

 “Here, take this.”

 A handle of some sort was pushed into my hold. I stared down at what I now held.

 “But- But this is yours-!” He silenced my protests.

 “I have one or two more sets,” he assured me. “That will keep you stable for now.”

 He took a quick step forward and but stopped as soon as he’d started. A conflicted grimace was reflected upon his face. With a sigh, he turned back to me, held my face with both hands, and planted a chaste kiss on my forehead.

 “Do take care of yourself.”

 And with that, he rushed into battle. It took me a moment to recover from the sleepy yet fluttery feelings of affection. Then I straightened up and looked down at the sword he’d given me.

 “I can’t even _use_ a two-handed sword!” I called back. My words fell on deaf ears. I sighed and sent my other hand to grip the hilt of the Sephira. An immediate reaction met me: raw _power_ seeped into my body, jumpstarting my heart, and clearing my vision. It was a misty feeling, hardly noticeable if I wasn’t looking for it, and it coursed through me along with the magic of Eos. “Woah…”

 I tried to lift the sword. And almost dropped it.

 “Oh, this is _heavy…”_

 I heaved the sword onto its round yet sharp point. Couldn’t Vayne make them float? How did he do that? Like a conductor?

 I thrust my hand forward. Nothing. I did it again. Nope. With a groan, I dragged the sword towards the battle. Its weight held me back. I felt exceedingly guilty for not doing anything useful, but… If I let go of this sword, I could collapse again.

 A shout broke the air and my heart nearly stopped. I knew that voice. I knew it well. My head snapped up to where Kefka was facing off against Noel, Locke, and… _Noctis._

 “No…!”

 I dropped the sword and _sprinted._ I ran past everyone on the battlefield. Something swished around in the air behind me, but I didn’t care, didn’t pay it any mind. My legs carried me right past Terra and another manikin of her. They shot me towards my brother, bypassing Vayne and Y’shtola and her friends. I was so close to Noct. I was so close to helping him, healing him. I was _so close_ to _ripping_ Kefka apart for even _daring_ to touch Noct-!

 As soon as I reached them, my arms curved back like a left-handed batter. Sephira appeared in my hands with a strength I didn’t know I had and I _swung_ the sword straight at Kefka, letting go and letting the damn thing travel like a missle straight towards him.

 “What the-?” The clown’s distracted protest was cut off by a crossed, red and gold longsword hitting him square in the middle. Something happened then. It was as swift as lightning. I was in one place, and then… Then I was right in front of him, a burst of light blue lighting my path. But I didn’t care at that moment.

 Ithilcalad appeared in my hand and I began whacking away at the damn clown. _“You. Piece. Of._ **_Shit.”_ **

 “Ow, ow, ow!” His cries did not deter me. I kept slicing and slashing away with all the might at I had. No one even tried to stop me. Then, with a growl, I mustered my strength and blasted him with ice. Sephira appeared in my hand. I pointed it straight down.

  _“Kill him.”_

 I breathed hard and deep.

  _“Did you not hear me? I said_ **_kill him.”_ **

_Not today, Chara._

The sword hit its mark.

My shoulders were heaving. My arms screamed for a break, aching. Kefka was all cut up and worse for wear. Sephira’s point was in the ground, next to his head.

  _“Don’t,”_ I whispered. _“Hurt. Noctis. Again.”_

 “_______…?” I whipped around. Noctis was slowly sitting up from the ground. “The hell…?”

 “Noct!” I abandoned the sword and ran right for him. Something followed in the air behind me. I fell to my knees and threw my arms around him. “You’re okay!”

 I tapped into my magic. I didn’t care. He was healed within the few seconds our hug lasted. He pushed me off, utterly bewildered.

 “What?”

 “Did you… Did you not _see that?!”_

 “See what?”

 “_______?!”

  _“What?”_

  _“You just_ **_warped.”_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will be taking a break - the next chapter will be uploaded after Thanksgiving (which is next Thursday for non-Americans). This chapter took a while to get out, as you know, so I need the extra time as well as a break in general. Make no mistake, I’m keeping this thing going. I will force myself, damn it!!  
> Inspiration is not lost on me. I just need to wait until Act 2, Ch. 6 is at least _announced._


	65. Dimension to the End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who is this strange voice...?

_ “You just  _ **_warped.”_ **

 

Had I? Had I  _ really? _ I had been so angry, so pent up and upset from my dark manikin mocking me about Noctis  _ dying _ that nothing had gotten in my way to at least avenge him.

“I… did…?” I echoed my own thoughts. “I didn’t even notice.”

“You definitely did,” Noctis said. We slowly got to our feet. “I mean… I’d know. There was the- the flash, the sound, everything.”

“What is  _ that?” _ Terra pointed at something behind me. It wasn’t Kefka - he was still processing what the hell had just happened; his life had probably flashed before his eyes. I turned to see only one of the Sephira twirling in the air at my shoulder. “Isn’t that Vayne’s?”

“Oh yeah,” I trailed off. “How did  _ that _ get there…?”

“Well,” Vayne came briskly walking, pride in his eyes, evident in his voice. “It is not what I expected, but I am no less impressed.”

“What? What happened? I didn’t black out, but like: that wasn’t there before.”

Vayne shook his head. “You dashed right past me. Sephira was at your heels.”

I blinked at him several times.  _ “Huh?” _ I shook it off. “Vayne, your sword is fucking  _ possessed.” _

It was his turn to look confused. “Whatever do you mean?”

“There was this voice… Telling me to  _ kill _ Kefka.”

“I mean,” Locke piped up and I glanced at him, “we wouldn’t have minded if you did.”

I looked back to Vayne, whose proud air had dropped from him. He… Was he going pale?

“Ow, ow, ow!!! It  _ hurts!” _

We all turned around. Kefka was on his knees, banging the ground with his fists like a child throwing a tantrum.

“My stomach hurts!!”

“Well, I  _ did _ practically  _ impale _ you,” I muttered, crossing my arms. Vayne recovered and came to wrap an arm around me, not trusting the clown in front of us. Said clown then began laughing hysterically.

“Hehehe! You made me laugh so hard my sides are splitting!” Kefka cackled. “Did you think Willy was going to wait around while you were busy hitting me?”

_ Shit. The Blackened Will was  _ **_gone._ **

At that moment, the ground beneath began to shake violently. We all struggled to keep our footing. The air shook, wobbling incredulously. When I couldn’t hold myself up, Vayne ignored the blood draining from his face and moved to support both of us. My bones bounced repeatedly and very quickly against the rest of my insides. I briefly wondered if this was what maracas felt like.

“The air is shaking?” I heard someone cry out.

“The Blackened Will is moving!” said someone else.

“How despicable…” came a third voice. “I can’t move. Is this the end?!”

“And now a little bug is about snuggle under this continent’s rug!” Kefka laughed. The voice in my head returned.

_ “If you do not act, he will destroy everything you have come to love.” _

I ignored my increasing inability to hold myself up, whipped around, and stuck my hand out towards Kefka. Sephira shot towards him, a glistening missile in the air. Kefka jumped to hover in the air and deflected the sword with magic. Growling, I tried to dart forward but Vayne stopped me.

“There is a time and place for everything,” he said lowly. The amount of  _ affection _ in his voice froze me in place. “There are more important matters at hand.”

There was pure, unadulterated pride in his voice. It calmed me for a few seconds before I remembered:  _ there was a voice speaking to me that was not my own. _

“Vayne, I-...” I was cut off by Mog’s exclamation.

“Kupo!” he was saying. “If we don’t stop it, the Blackened Will will go on a rampage!”

“If what he said is true,” said Alisaie, who I hadn’t noticed until then, “then it had unlimited energy to run rampant!”

Vayne fumed quietly, his chest rising and falling with the rage to protect his home world.

“Is there no way to detect it?” Warrior of Light asked Mog.

“No, kupo!” Mog explained. “The entire world is jumbled! It’s like being in a storm, kupo!”

The ground and air continued to shake. I stumbled to straighten myself so I could hear everyone talk more clearly. Warm arms pulled me closer.

“There’s no way I can trace its movements with just my pompom, kupo!”

“So we have no way of finding it!” Locke declared. “This world is in danger!”

“In any case, let’s evacuate to the airship, kupo! This place might collapse at any minute!”

I found that not only was the ground vibrating at alarming speeds, I was also shivering in fear. The airship arrived not long after Noel saved Mog from a Torsion that opened up to suck him in. Torsions were appearing everywhere. The Blackened Will was out of control.

Once we were safely inside the airship, I found myself in a corner with Vayne, Noctis, and a Prompto who had no idea what the hell was going on. We explained what had happened and now both Prompto and I were shivering in our little corner, huddled together. Sephira still hovered in the air, waiting to be claimed by either Vayne of myself. I refrained from looking at it for fear of the creepy voice that made my skin crawl.

“So what do we do now?” Prompto asked, subconsciously inching closer. “Is that… Is that it? Did- Did we fail?”

“Not yet, we haven’t,” Vayne ground out. He was glaring at Prompto for some reason. “Where there is a Blackened Will, there is a way…”

I would’ve laughed, but… that voice in my head still scared the hell out of me.

“I think they’re planning to ask Materia what the hell’s going on,” Noctis said, arms crossed. “She better have a good answer…”

“I wouldn’t count on it,” Vayne and I said nearly at the same time. I continued to say, “Not even Spiritus knew what’s going on, so I mean…”

A large gust of air hit the airship. We stumbled to keep our footing as it swayed to stabilize itself. I grabbed onto Prompto, hoping the turbulence wouldn’t last long. When I looked back up, Vayne’s eyes were locked onto Prompto, filled with rage.

“Oh, and uh, ________?” Noctis attracted my attention. “What were you saying about a… possessed sword…?”

...1...2...3…

“Oh!” I perked up and looked at Vayne. “Yeah, your sword is in dire need of an exorcism.”

Prompto giggled at the hidden innuendo I wish I had gone to great lengths to avoid. Vayne’s sour expression flashed to a stricken one and then to his usual calm demeanor. He reached out to take Sephira down from midair. I watched in awe.

“How are you lifting that with  _ one hand?!” _ I demanded. Noctis raised a brow.

“Gladio does that all the time,” he said. I sputtered in utter bewilderment.

“That-that doesn’t-! I mean-  _ look at that. _ I couldn’t even lift it with  _ two _ hands!”

“So? You’re still learning. It’s not hard.”

My eye twitched. “Oh yeah? Bet  _ you _ couldn’t.”

Noct stepped forward angrily. “Hey. I  _ can _ . Just ‘cause I don’t look like Gladio doesn’t mean I’m not strong”

“I dunno, Noct. I’d like to see you try.”

Prompto glanced back and forth between us in amusement.

“I don’t have anything to prove to you!” Noct scoffed.

“Mmhm.” I nodded. “Just as I thought. You  _ can't.” _

“Take that back!”

“No. It’s kinda funny, in a weird way.”

“Well, neither can you!”

“Neither can I  _ what?” _

“You can’t- hey, where’d Vayne go?”

“Oh? Trying to change the subject, are… we…?”

The spot Vayne had once been been standing in was now vacant. Prompto was looking much more relaxed, as well.

“Where  _ did _ he go?”

It only took a few minutes to find him, but when I did… That’s when I began to worry.

Vayne was standing in an empty doorway that led to an even emptier room. The gentle sway of the airship did nothing to deter him from talking to thin air as I came up behind him.

“...ve her be,” he was saying. I pressed myself up against the wall and listened. “If you’ve been watching, you know more sorrow is the last thing she needs. I will  _ not _ have you-...”

He fell quiet for a second.

“...Of course I do. I always have. I did not think you able to reach us once the Suncryst was destroyed and the last of your power gone… But even so… I will only trust a god so far with her.”

_ Who the hell is he talking to? A god? Other than Spiritus and Materia??? What does that even mean?! _

_ “Yes, _ I care for her. That does not mean, however, that you can  _ use _ her to whatever goal you may have in mind here.  _ I will not allow it. _ She must be safe from those who would use her for ill will. ...Yes, even if that means me…”

I heard the soft clinking of his light armor as he turned abruptly.

“_______?”

_ Shit. _

I poked my head around the doorway. “Um. Hi.”

“Whatever are you doing?” He walked to where I was now half-hiding. His expression was calm but his eyes held alarm.

“Um… Well…” Do I tell him I think he’s insane? “You just kinda… disappeared. We were worried.”

“Ah…” His eyes softened. “There is no need to panic just yet, my dear.”

_ No! Don’t let the pet names fool you! _

I tilted my head. “Who were you talking to?”

His eyes widened slightly. “Talking to?”

“Yeah.” I glanced to the room and back. “Do you have, like - oh, do you still have that transmissions thing?”

_ Please be the comm, please be the comm. _

He cleared his throat. “Ah, well, yes, of a sort.”

That did nothing to assuage my worries. I stepped closer. “Vayne, are you feeling alright? If you’re hearing voices…”

He shook his head. “No, do not worry yourself with me, ________.”

I quickly straightened up. “Is it the sword? It’s your possessed sword, isn’t it!”

“Possess-? No, it isn’t possessed… It is simply… the  _ manner _ in which Sephira received its blessing of Mist.”

“...So it’s possessed.”

“No.”

“You gave me a  _ possessed sword?” _

“It is  _ not _ possessed.”

“Then why are we both hearing voices?!”

“________, are you sure  _ you _ are feeling well?”

That stopped me for a moment. “Well, yeah. I mean, internally I’m dying from the stress of life and the weight of Noctis’ world on my shoulders, but other than that, I’m good.”

He sighed and stepped closer. “_______, truly, I assure you I am perfectly fine.”

“But… the sword-”

“Will be completely functional should you desire to use it again.”

This was not a fight I could win. I let my shoulders relax and pushed the issue to the back of my mind.

“You scared Prompto, you know,” I told him. He raised an eyebrow. “Why were you glaring at him like that?”

He opened his mouth but then thought better and closed it. With yet another sigh, he said resignedly, “Honestly, I’ve no idea. Perhaps it was simply the leftover anger from combatting Kefka. That sad excuse for a jester is quite possibly the most excruciating man I’ve ever had the  _ pleasure _ of meeting.”

_ Yeah, Kefka isn’t a pleasure in any case. _

“However, there is another matter I wish to discuss.”

I tilted my head again. “What is it?”

He placed his hands on his hips. “You seem rather adamant to avoid acknowledging your newfound ability.”

Oh. Right. “Well, I mean… I didn’t even notice. I don’t even know if I could do it again. I was just worried about Noctis…”

“Practice makes perfect, dear ________, and I’m sure your brother would be more than willing to teach you.”

 

We never got the chance to practice. As soon as some of Materia’s warriors had talked to the goddess herself - and Spiritus, apparently - we were told that Kefka had been located. Or rather, we were close to finding him. Materia and Spiritus had, surprisingly, worked together to use a Torsion to find him in some place called the World of Illusions. I hadn’t been there before, but it belonged to the summons. Noctis had told me about  _ them. _ They were like the Astrals but different; not quite gods but powerful beings that lent us their power when we needed it. Some of them even had the same names as a few of the Astrals.

The place we found ourselves inside looked almost exactly like the inside of a normal Torsion. We determined we’d need to find Kefka as soon as possible. As Noctis, Prompto, Vayne, and I stepped through the dark portal, I felt it: the Blackened Will. Its presence was as gravity, a force bearing down on the magic and determination inside me. It was strong, pulling and tugging on my whole body. My stomach flipped and twisted.

“Noctis,” I groaned.

“Yeah?”

“Can- Can I stay in the airship? Please?”

“What?” He stopped to examine me. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t… I don’t feel very good…”

“You gonna be okay?” Prompto asked. “Should we find a healer or something?”

Vayne tilted my head up. After a thorough examination of my very tired demeanor, he spoke. “It would seem the Blackened Will has an effect on ________. It is similar to the spirit moogle’s, I believe.”

“Dammit,” Noctis hissed. “What now?”

“We… find a healer?” Prompto suggested again. Vayne shook his head.

“Her condition will worsen the stronger the beast grows,” he said. “We need to hunt it down and kill it.”

Finding Kefka, and by extension the Blackened Will, was harder than expected. Materia had helped by giving exact coordinates to the world between worlds they were now in. Unfortunately, it would seem we had to lure them out. And how did we do that?

“Ugh, more of these,” I muttered. Dark manikins were everywhere. I prayed any gods listening, Materia, Spiritus, or otherwise, that the one I had fought earlier wasn’t here. “They’re so creepy.”

“I know, right?” Prompto said. “They’re so empty. I can’t imagine being  _ not _ full of life!”

“Like MT’s…” Noctis added. “But they can talk.”

The three of shuddered. The last thing we needed here was a ton of MTs. Not after the Magitek Unit that had attacked me earlier. Never again.

“M-T’s?” Vayne repeated.

“They’re these…” Noctis searched for the right word. “Humanoid… robot… things… Niflheim mass produces them as soldiers so they don’t have to send their own citizens into battle. They follow us everywhere.”

“Like the bases we raided!” Prompto said. “Or all the ones near Steyliff Grove!”

“To be fair,” I said, “the bases were  _ imperial _ bases, so of course they’d be there.”

“Good point.”

“Mass produced…” Vayne faced forward, staring into the dark purple abyss in front of us. I whacked his arm with my hand and then pointed at him.

“Don’t get any ideas!” I started. He opened his mouth to speak but I cut him off.

“Idea-?”

“Bad Vayne!” I tried to bonk him on the head but he dodged it. “No mass producing armies!”

I tried to whack him again but he sidestepped me. “For goodness’ sake, will you  _ please _ train her before you set her loose?”

**_“Train me?!”_ ** That set me in an irate stance. Fire appeared in my curled hand. Vayne stepped back. “You wanna say that  _ again, _ pretty boy?”

“Prett-?”

“I’ve gotten stronger.” We halted for a moment. My dark manikin now stood behind us, a twin of Noctis by her side. “And it would seem you’re angry enough to  _ want _ to partake this time.”

I whimpered silently, hoping she wouldn’t say anything about Noctis dying this time.

“Ready to face your fate now? And his?”

She tilted her head towards Dark Noctis, who addressed his own predecessor.

“Deep down, you know what’ll happen,” he said. His voice was a garbled mumble. “You think you’re ready? You think you could ever  _ be _ ready?”

“Shut up.” Noctis stepped forward. “Do I need to kick your ass, too?”

“You’re going to die, ________,” Dark Me said. Her eyebrows furrowed angrily. Her hands curled into fists. “Damn it, why won’t you just  _ get angry for once?!” _

This time I whimpered for real. Several swords whipped forward, shimmering. They nearly hit their target at top speed. She dodged.

“I think that is enough  _ chatter _ for now,” Vayne growled. “You’ve upset her once and that is more than enough reason to see to your demise.”

“Oh please.” Dark Me rolled her eyes.  _ “You’re _ the reason I can hardly feel any love. Do you even  _ know _ what you do to her?”

“Sh-shut up please,” I sputtered. Dark Noctis growled.

“Can we get this show on the road already?” he asked.

“You remind her of Earth,” Dark Me continued, ignoring her brother. “Of everything Earth was, what it could've been…”

My heart ached and hurt as she spoke. It was… surprisingly true, the more I thought about it. But I also knew that I wasn’t projecting that love onto him: I liked him for  _ him _ , not because he reminded me of home.

“Hey,” the real Noctis cut in. “We gonna dance or what?”

Prompto was loading his gun. Neither of them were happy with Dark Me using Earth to taunt us.

“You got two choices!” Prompto said somewhat confidently. “Run, or face my bullets of fury!”

“Oh, we’ll fight alright,” Dark Noctis said lowly. A sword appeared in his hands. Dark Me raised her own dominant one. Dark purple flames flickered in it.

“Finally,” she said. “All that power juice I stole  from Kefka will to go to good use.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I’m sorry to say this one’s a lil shorter. I‘ll be taking yet another break, maybe till after Christmas. Act 2, Ch. 6 won’t be coming until the 19th, and I’d like to be ahead in the story (in my Docs file) before I start posting again so I’m not always rushing to finish the latest chapter. I hope you can understand. In the meantime, I’m sure the Vayne POV (Last of the Real Ones) and the Larsa Scenario will be updated within this time frame, so if you need more content, feel free to check those out. Maybe I’ll even update the Noctis POV!  
> And before I forget! Eravanthia is writing her own fanfic based on this one!! I’m honestly speechless and didn’t think this fic would gain as much traction as it has but, like... Thank you, all of you. It... You have no idea how much all of your support has meant to the these past months. It’s really helped me with some personal stuff and I can never thank you enough. Geez, it feels so short a time since I first posted this story but it’s actual been a while, huh...  
> Anyway! Era’s story can be found on her author page thing - it’s called When Angels of Eden Fall to the Dark of You and takes place in Final Fantasy XII. It’s also a Not-Ignis/Reader so if you like Balthier, I recommend it! Thanks again to all of you and thanks to Era for... well, everything these past few weeks lol.  
> Happy Holidays everyone! Hope you have a great December! Fear not, I will  
> return!  
> -Aspie


	66. When Your Alternate Dark Self Spills The Beans And You Think Everything’s Okay For A Split Second

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fight begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m aliiiive! Merry Christmas to everyone! ^w^ and Happy New Year! I hope you all have had a good holiday break and happy holidays all around! The story’s been picked up once again and I am READY.  
> So read on if you dare lol

When Dark Me leaped forward, flaming sword in hand, Vayne was the first one to meet her. It only took a handful of hard punches to send her flying. She righted herself in midair and dashed back to us as Dark Noctis and Real Noctis clashed with their Airstep Swords. There were flashes of sky blue and dark purple as they lit up the air as Noctis rushed to make sure his doppelganger couldn’t speak for much longer. I stood in place for a moment, still feeling the effects of the Blackened Will feeding on my magic. I could feel myself swaying slightly.

“I _said,”_ Dark Me growled as she continued to clash with Vayne, “why won’t you: _Get. Angry.”_

She managed to temporarily push him back. Her fingers curled and she made a throwing motion in my direction. Before I could move, fiery blast lit up the space around me. My body was launched into the air. I began to fall.

My memories flashed before my eyes, starting with my fall to Eos. I didn’t even realize my mouth was open and making noise. The purple cosmos underneath me seemed endless but I knew if I kept going, I’d hit the ground eventually. Subconsciously, I called out for Noctis.

There was another bright flash of light and an arm wrapped itself around me.

“I gotcha,” Noctis said. “I’m not gonna let you fall again.”

He warped us back to the invisible floor. More dark manikins had joined in the fight. I hadn’t even seen them coming. Prompto was backed up against us by a Dark Y’shtola and Locke while Dark Me managed to turn Vayne around. My sword appeared in my hand, though my vision was beginning to ever-so-slightly swim. We were surrounded.

_How did they manage to do that so quickly?_

“You think you could ever be king?” Dark Noctis said in his scratchy voice. “Do you think you’ll _ever_ be even _half_ as good as Dad?”

_“Shut up!”_ Noctis, himself, jerked his hand to the right. His armiger sparkled into being, circling around him. “Whatever I can do has got to be enough. It _has_ to be!”

“O _King of Light,”_ Dark Me mocked, “don’t you know your _fate?”_

The dark mist began to waft out from and around her body. Her hand held the dark flames once more.

“What’s it to you?” Noct snapped. My heart leapt in fear.

“Don’t,” I said weakly. “Please.”

When I stepped forward, every manikin pointed their weapons at me. I halted.

“We won’t fail,” Noctis whispered to himself. “We _can’t.”_

I mustered up every bit of my courage to lift Ithilcalad to point right at Dark Me. “And we don’t.”

I didn’t say any more. I didn’t get a chance to. The Sephira glinted in the air in the light of the stars as they shot through every dark manikin while they were distracted. Several of them fell, some remained standing. Dark Me took the chance and charged me. Gunshots rang through the air as I blocked.

Swing, slash, _clang!_ I met every one of her hits with carefully practiced movements. Her blade slid off mine and she jerked back. She used both hands to deliver a wide slash. I shoved my hands up to catch her sword in a block of ice. She raged and blasted it with fire. I dashed to the left and swung round. She barely blocked it. I pushed her back with swing after swing. I had no idea where she was going but I kept moving her there.

“Just,” she tried to distract me, _“Tell. Him.”_

_“No,”_ I grunted. A bolt of lightning struck down from nowhere. _“Not._ **_Yet._ ** _”_

_“You’re going-!”_ She thrusted forward. The point of her sword nicked me where I already had scars. I winced. _“-To_ **_DIE!”_ **

I swung Ithilcalad like a golf club. She grew angrier. Her slashes came in torrents and I couldn’t block them all. Cuts littered my skin and clothes. I forced myself to ignore the pain as she kept coming at me.

_“Dammit, why won’t you just_ **_end it already?!_ ** _”_

She jumped back and I took the opening. I rushed her. The Blackened Will decided at that moment to suck up a big chunk of my magic. I flimsily swung at her as my feet stumbled.  She was still backing away. I didn’t get why.

In my weakened state, I giggled breathlessly to myself. Ithilcalad dissipated. I spread my arms. “It’s over, ___-kin! I have the high ground!”

Her rage grew ever stronger. “You fucking assho-”

Her chest suddenly burst open. The darkness took over, replications of the same sword slicing their way through until she was so full of them, she might as well have been a knife holder. She fell to her knees.

“I believe we have reached a point of surrender,” Vayne said behind me.

_He’d make a good Jedi turned Sith._

_Will you PLEASE focus?!_

Dark Me coughed. “Bet you like this position, huh…?”

Vayne rolled his eyes. “That’s _enough._ Your brother has since expired. It is time to see to _your_ end.”

The Sephira made a circle in midair, all aiming for her head.

“________, dear, come here.”

I inched closer to him, shuffling awkwardly as my head swam. An arm pulled me to him. I couldn’t stop staring at the gaping hole in her chest where the swords had been. The hand attached to the arm around me rested on my head, gently pressing down so I couldn’t see anything but Vayne’s armor.

“Do it at your own peril,” Dark Me rasped in her garbled voice. Vayne hesiated. “You think I’m not prepared to die?”

Vayne said nothing. He kept my head against his chest.

“Well?” 

Nothing. I could hear Noctis and Prompto fighting in the background.

“Are you gonna do it or not?”

Vayne took a deep breath. The one he let out was somewhat shaky.

“Well, Noct’s ancestors won’t hesitate. Neither should you, you mur-”

Vayne’s other arm twitched in my vision. I heard Sephira whistle through the air and the squelching of their blades ripping through skin. I shivered. The arm holding me tightened its grip. Dark Me turned to full darkness and dissipated into sparkles. Vayne’s free hand fell to his side. He took another deep breath. A moment passed. I let my head finally rest itself on him. The conflict behind us ended. All was quiet.

_I hope they’re okay…_

“________!” Prompto called. “You okay?”

I tried nodding but he couldn’t see me.

“________?!”

“Necessity…” I heard Vayne mutter to himself before he turned his head. “She is alright. A bit worse for wear, but I assume _someone_ can remedy that.”

“_______?” That was Noctis. “You okay?”

My head peeked out from Vayne’s arm. “Yeh.”

Noct nodded. I slunk out from Vayne’s embrace, giving him a thankful smile before walking to my brother.

“She scratched me up, though,” I said sheepishly. My feet half-slid on the ground. “Also I feel woozy.”

It was then I noticed others had come to help

Terra and Edgar were standing nearby. Y’shtola was slowly making her way to us, probably in case anyone needed healing.

“By the Twelve,” she sighed as she neared us, “you _do_ attract trouble like no one I’ve ever seen. ...Well, there could be _one_ other who could compare.”

“Like a moth to the flame,” Vayne said.

“What would Ignis say?” Prompto shook his head teasingly. A cold shiver ran down my spine.

“Oh god, don’t remind me,” I said. Everyone chuckled before Y’shtola graciously healed us all. I continued to shiver in my weakened state. A strange pulse began in my head, like someone was knocking rhythmically on my subconscious. I didn’t like it.

“_________?” Noctis asked. “You sure you’re okay?”

“I don’t…” I searched for the right words. “It’s… feeding on me…”

“The Blackened Will?” Edgar asked. I nodded. “We need to find it. Quickly!”

We didn’t get very far before Kefka caught up to us.

“Well, well!” he said in his obnoxious voice. “The fighting energy here sure is intense!”

“Hey!” called someone else. Materia’s other warriors were gathering round. “There he is!”

“Looks like he’s out of luck,” said Cloud.

“Not even death would be enough punishment for his deeds,” Edgar decreed. “Perhaps we could imprison him between dimensions.”

“Nice thinking!” said someone I didn’t know. “You’re gonna pay for all you’ve put us through!”

Kefka cackled. “All I’ve put you through us generated the energy I wanted! And I took, thankyouverymucho!”

“Do you think this guy is using our battle energy to feed the Blackened Will?” Zidane asked.

“It’s not just that,” Noctis growled. “That thing’s sucking ________ 's magic energy, too.”

“Dingdingdingding!” Kefka exclaimed. “I _also_ nibble on some of it to keep my super-ultra-maximum buff-fest rolling!”

The darkness began to emanate from him.

“Which makes you soggy paper straws before my drink bar of ruin! The one who’s outta luck is YOUSE!”

“Don’t expect your petty insults to suddenly get a rise out of us,” Edgar told him firmly. “We’re prepared to fight. No matter how strong you’ve become, we _shall_ defeat you!”

“Ooh, what a riveting speech,” Kefka said sarcastically. “I’m shaking in my boots. Well then, let’s leave everything else behind and drink to ruin! Bottoms up!”

As everyone entered a fighting stance, Noctis called out to Vayne. “Hey, I’m gonna have to ask you to take a raincheck on this one.”

“I beg your pardon?” Vayne was poised and ready to tear Kefka a new one.

“Get _______ back to the airship! The last thing she needs is the Blackened Will sucking up more of her power!”

With a sigh, Vayne nodded and turned to gesture for me to follow him. My head was too foggy to think of any protests. I followed behind him slowly, feet sliding on the ground. His pace was brisk and I couldn’t keep up. He got ten feet away. I couldn’t speak. The stars looked blurry now.

I hadn’t realized I’d stopped until there were two arms scooping me up into the air. I jolted and clung to the neck attached to their shoulders.

“Shh, I will not let you fall,” Vayne said quietly. I could hear the sounds of combat behind me.

“Why am I always the target…?” I slurred. “Why _me?_ There are plenty of people here with powerful… power. Like Noctis!”

“You are easy to take advantage of, my dear. Your magic is quite different, easy to recognize and latch onto. A bit like the spirit moogle, in a way. You both exude a powerful aura of magic to those who are attuned to it. It is a wonder the Blackened Will did not feed on you before.”

_This is what I get for Earth not having magic._

_Fucking… magicless worlds…_

Fortunately, the Torsion leading to the airship was still open. Vayne set me down gently once we were inside. I wished he hadn’t. It was… nice… being held like that…

“Now what?” I asked, voice thick.

“You need rest,” Vayne said. “Your adventures thus far have proven to be rather tiring, as it were.”

Well, I certainly wasn’t going to complain about more sleep.

We were in a little corner of the airship’s main interior. I summoned a blanket from Noct’s inventory, slipped my jacket off to use as a pillow, and lied down. Vayne watched me, his expression unreadable. Once I was comfortably tucked into my blanket he turned to stand with his back to the wall. The dizziness in my head began to settle as I closed my eyes. Sleep was well within reach…

But it just would not come. The next few moments were filled with tossing and turning and the pulse in my head returning. I didn’t like how it felt. The Blackened Will was trying to influence me, it was knocking at my door. I couldn’t let in. I _could not_ let it in. ...Would sleeping allow it to enter my thoughts…?

“Vayne…?” I whispered. He hummed. “I’m scared to sleep… What… What if it comes in when I’m… when I’m…”

“Vulnerable?” Vayne finished for me. I nodded and snuggled into my blanket. He thought it over. “...No, I do not believe it could. Your powers lie somewhat dormant whilst asleep. I’m sure you would be fine.”

“But what if it comes in anyway?”

“It _won’t._ I will make sure of that.”

“...Can you come sit by me?”

He did so reluctantly, probably not wanting to sit on the floor. When he was situated by my head, I lifted myself up and moved my jacket to cover his leg. Then I let my head rest in his lap. A small noise of protest left him as I snuggled closer.

“_-_______, this- this really isn’t…” he stammered. “This is hardly… _appropriate…!”_

“Sleepy…” I mumbled, pulling my blanket further over me. “Noct lets me…”

“Maybe so, but he is your _brother._ This-... This is rather… _intimate…_ ”

My brain did not fully register his words. The floor may have been cold and hard, but Vayne was the opposite. His warmth was the push I needed to drift off into dreamland.

“________?”

I didn’t reply. 

“________…?”

Nothing. He sighed and let his fingers run through my hair. I exhaled softly at the feeling.

“Sleep well… my love…”

 

Waking up was a bit jarring. Not only was my head finally clear, but I had been moved to a different part of the airship. Vayne was nowhere in sight. In fact, _no one_ was in sight. I forced myself to sit up. My neck felt stiff. I carefully tipped my head from side to side. When my neck felt stretched enough, I stood. There was no wobbling, no dizziness, no sick stomach…!

No, I couldn’t get my hopes up just yet. I needed to find Noctis first. Voices were coming from the other side of the closed door. It was as good a place as any to start. I opened it hesitantly and peeked out.

Various people of all races, species, and worlds were standing and sitting together. Chatter filled the air. The sound caused some anxiety to rise up. I swallowed. They were just people. No big deal. Only people. Yep. That’s it. Nothing more, though I would’ve preferred something less.

I slid out of my napping room and closed the door quietly. No one had noticed me yet. They were distracted by exiting the airship. Good. Blinking the remainder of my sleepiness away, I started to look through all the rooms for Noctis, Prompto, or _someone_ I trusted well enough to talk to.

Needless to say, I found no one. Time to check topside.

The wind was blowing fiercely in the skies of the World of Darkness. The airship had been stopped over a quaint forest. I could see people moving through the trees if I leaned over the railing. Buuut that wasn’t safe so I backed away after one glance. When my eyes scanned the top of the ship, I found it was relatively empty. Only a few people I didn’t recognize had stayed behind. Back downstairs we go…

As soon as I came into the main hallway, I heard someone call out my name. Prompto was exiting the room I had been sleeping in,

“There you are!” He said, jogging over to me. “You scared me for a sec!”

I smiled apologetically. “Sorry. I was looking for either you or Noct. How’d the fight go?”

“We won!” Prompto punched the air, “They locked Kefka away in another dimension - _with_ the Blackened Will! Man, that thing is scary…”

I nodded, remembering watching people fight it on one of Spiritus’ magic surveillance screens.

“Are _you_ okay, though? Vayne said you were _super_ out of it.”

“I’m alright,” I said. “I was more worried about you guys, though. Where’s Noct?”

“Oh, right! He and a bunch of other guys are training in the forest right now. He asked me to get you when you woke up so you work on your _awesome_ new warping skills!”

And so, Prompto led me to Noctis. There was a small ruin out on the outskirts of the forest. Noctis was using a few fallen pillars for target practice. Every throw of his sword was a practiced movement I wasn’t sure I’d be able to replicate. How could I learn to do that so quickly?

“Hey,” Noct greeted us casually. “You ready to learn to warp?”

I gulped. “Not really…”

“It’s not as hard as it looks. You just throw something… and you’re there.”

“Yeah, but you’ve had years of practice. How the fuck do you even _throw_ a _sword?”_

“Well come here and I’ll show you.”

I knew Noctis had various ways he threw his weapons. It probably depends on a lot of factors, but for _me,_ he was focusing on Ithilcalad’s weight. I had the hilt in my dominant hand, holding it like I would any other time. Noctis was standing next to me, holding said hand and helping me draw my arm into the air.

“It’s just like throwing anything else. You pull your arm back,” He guided my arm back, “and throw. Make sure you’re conscious of balance, though, or you might fall over.”

I made the motion of throwing my sword but slowly and without letting go. Its weight was completely dependent on me holding it up. My arm didn’t like that. I couldn’t hold it straight up for very long.

“Okay, now throw it.”

“I can’t believe you want me to _throw_ a _sword,”_ I muttered. “Okay… Here we go…”

I pulled my arm back again, ignoring my increasingly weary muscles.

_Just yeet it… It’s not as hard as it looks._

_This bitch empty…_

“yEET-!” I launched the sword in the air and watched as it clanged against a fallen pillar. My arm relished in its relief. “I… I did it!”

I grinned at Noctis, who was half pleased, half confused.

“Yeah, you… sure did…” he trailed off. He went to pick the sword up.

“What about the warping?” Prompto called from the sidelines. “I’ve got my camera ready!”

I checked my pockets for my phone. _“Prompto!”_

“Whaaat? I thought you’d want a picture of your first warping session!”

“Did you forget?” Noctis asked, handing me Ithilcalad.

“Kinda…” I let its tip balance on the ground. “Again?”

“Yeah. Let’s try again.”

_Okay… I can do this…_

I searched for the magic inside of me. To make sure I had a hold of it, I let the hilt frost over. When I was ready, I drew my arm back and threw.

Ithilcalad clanged against the pillar again. I opened eyes I didn’t remember closing. Nothing had moved except my sword. My shoulders dropped.

“Ooookaaay…” Prompto sounded confused. “How come it didn’t work?”

“I dunno…” Noctis answered, just as bewildered. “Most magic isn’t really my thing, but warping always came naturally.”

“Maybe we’re opposites?” I suggested.

“Maybe… I guess that would kind of make sense. ...We should keep trying, though. It’s not like you’ve had an accident that restricted your power.”

And with that, we continued our training. Several times Noctis would demonstrate by warping for me. I kept throwing Ithilcalad with no results but slowly better aim. Since I couldn’t throw with my other arm, I copped out after a while. My dominant one was aching and screaming for rest.

“Well, we’ll just have to keep on trying,” Noctis said, scratching his neck. “Maybe when we see Gladio again he can help you. I’m not… really the best teacher…”

“You’re not that bad,” I said. “I mean, I can _throw_ a _sword_ now.”

“Mannn,” Prompto whined, disappointed. “I was so hoping we’d get to see you warp.”

His tone was the definition of the sad face emoji.

“I’ll get it one day,” I said. “Hopefully.”

“We can always dream!”

“Oh, by the way,” Noctis crossed his arms, “_______?”

“Yeah?” I didn’t like the look in his eyes.

“I meant to ask earlier: what did your dark manikin mean earlier by ‘you’re going to die’?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you’re interested, I’ve also uploaded a Christmas Special feat. FFXV cast and Vayne. It’s a bit late but I least I got it out before 2020 lol. It’s called “If Only In My Dreams” and dear Reader is trying to introduce Christmas to everyone.


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